J^TcHu^rfX   Sf. 


'A- 


.  V 


«/^J 


An 

Account  of  the 

LIFE 

Of  the  late  Reverend 

Mr.  David  Brainerd^ 

Minifter  of  the  Golpel, 

Miffio7tary  to  the  Indians,  from  the 
honourable  Society  in  Scotland^  for 
the  Propagation  of  Chriftian  Know- 
ledge, and  Paftor  of  a  Church  of 
Chriftian  Indians  in  New-Jerfey. 

Who  died  at  Northampton  in  New-England, 
OHoh,  oth  1747.  ^"  ^^^  3°^^  ^^^^  ^^  ^'^  -^S^  • 

Chiefly  taken  from  his  own  Diary,  and  other  private 
Writings,  written  for  his  own  life  j  and  now 
publilhed, 


By  Jonathan  Edwards,  A.  M. 

Minifter  of  the  Gofpel  at  Northampton, 

BOSTON:      N  E. 

Printed  for  and  Sgld  by  D,  Henchman,  in  CornhiH. 
1749^ 


,#^>-  -g? 


The  PREFACE, 


THERE  are  two  Ways  oF  rcprcfenting and 
recommending  true  Religion  and  Virtue  to 
the  World,  which  God  hath  made  Ufe  of; 
The  one  is  by  Do6lrine  and  Precept ;  the 
other  is  by  Inftance  and  Example  :  Both  are  abundantly 
ufed  in  the  holy  Scriptures,  Not  only  are  the  Grounds^ 
Nature,  Defign  and  Importance  of  Religion  clearly  ex- 
hibited in  the  Doctrines  of  Scripture,  and  it's  Exercife 
andPradlice  plainly  delineated  and  abundantly  cnjoin'd 
and  enforced  in  it's  Commands  and  Counfcls  :  But  there 
we  have  many  excellent  Examples  of  Religion,  in  it's 
Power  and  Pradice,  fet  before  us,  in  the  Hiftories  both 
of  the  Old  Teftament  and  New.  — -  Jesus  Christ^ 
the  great  Prophet  of  God, when  he  came  into  the  World 
to  be  the  Light  of  the  iVorld^  to  teach  and  enforce  true 
Religion,  in  a  greaterDegree  than  ever  had  been  before, 
he  made  Ufe  of  both  thefe  Methods  :  In  his  Dodrine 
he  declared  rhe  Mind  and  Will  of  God,  and  the  Nature 
and  Properties  of  that  Vcrtue  which  becomes  Creatures 
of  ourMake  and  in  ourCircumftances,  more  clearly  and 
fully  than  ever  it  had  been  beforejand  more  powerfull/ 
enforced  it  by  what  he  declared  of  the  Obligations  and 
Inducements  to  Holinefs  ;  and  he  alfo  in  his  own  Prac- 
tice gave  a  mod  perfcdl  Example  of  the  Vertue  hs 
taught.  He  exhibited  to  the  World  fuch  an  illuilrious 
Pattern  of  Humility,  divine  LoVe,  difcreet  Zeal,  Self- 
deaial,  Qbed/ence, '  Patience,   Refignation,   Fortitude^ 

A  2  Mceknefs^ 


ii  fhe  PREF ace: 

Meeknefs,  Forgivenefs,  Compafiion,  Benevolence,  and 
univerfal  Holinefs,  as  neither  Men  nor  Angels  ever  faw 
before.     God  alfo  in  his  Providence   has  been  wont  to 
make  Ufe  of  both  thefe  Methods  to  hold  forth  Light  to 
Mankind,  and  Inducement  to  their  Duty,   in  all  Ages : 
Hr  has  from  Time  toTime  raifcd  up  eminent  Teachers, 
to  exhibit  and  bear   Tcftimony  to  the  Truth   in  their 
DoSrine,  and  oppofe  the  Errors,  D.rknefs  and  Wicked- 
m\s  of  the  World  ;  and    alfo  has,    from  Age  to  Age, 
raifcd  up  fome  eminent  Perfons  that  havefet  bright  £;^- 
(jiw/)/(?j  of  that  Religion  that  is  taught  and  prefcnbed  in 
the  Word  of  God  ;  whofe  Examples  have   in  divine 
Providence  been  fct  forth  to  publickView.     Thefe  have 
3  great  Tendency   to  engage   the  Attention  of  Men  to 
the  Dodtrines  and  Rules  that  are  taught,  and  greatly  to 
confirm  and  enforce  them  ;  and   efpecially  when  thefe 
bright  Examples  have   been  exhibited   in  the  fame  Per- 
sons that  have  been  eminent  teachers,  fo  that  the  World 
has  had  Opportunity  to  fee  fuch  a  Confirmation  of  the 
Truth, Efficacy,  andAmiablenefsof  the  Religion  taught, 
in  the  FrfiCtice  of   the    fame  Perfons   that   have   moft 
dearly   and  forceabjy  taught   it  ;  and  above  all,  when 
thefe  bright  Examples  have  been  fet  by  eminentTeach- 
ers  in  a  variety  of  unufual  Circumflances  of  remarkable 
"Trial  •,  and  God  has   Vvithal    remarkably  diftinguifli'd 
them  with  wonderful  Succefs  of  their   Inflrudlions    and 
Labours,  confiiling  in  glorious  Events   that  have  been 
in  many  Refpeds  new  and  firange. 

Such  an  Inftance  we  have  in  the  excellenlP^r/off.whofQ 
pfe  is  publifned  in  the  following  Pages.  HisExampIe 
is  attended  with  a  great  Variety  of  Circum(iances,tend- 
ing  to  engage  the  Attention  of  religious  People,  efpeci- 
ally in  thefe  Parrs  of  the  World  ;  He  was  one  of  dif- 
tinguii^M  natural  Abilities ;  as  all  arc  fenfjble,  that  had 
Acquaintance  with  him  :  He  was  a  Miniller  of  the 
Golpel,  and  one  who  was  called  to  unufual  Services  \(\ 
ihu  Wcrjc,  whofe  Mini/tr/  v/as  artendcd  with   very  re, 

markab!^ 


ne  F  REF  AC  E'  iu 

markable  and  unufual  Events,  an  Account  of  which 
has  already  been  given  to  thePublick  ;  one  whofeCourfe 
of  Religion  began  before  the  lateTimes  of  extraordinary 
religious  Commotion,  but  yet  one  that  lived  in  thofc 
Times,  and  went  through  them,  and  was  very  much  in 
the  Way  of  the  various  extraordinary  Effedls  and  unuijal 
Appearances  of  that  Day,  and  was  not  an  idleSpedlator, 
but  had  a  near  Concern  in  many  Things  that  pafs'd  at 
that  Time  j  one  that  had  a  very  extenfiveAcquaintance 
with  thofe  that  have  been  the  Subjcds  of  the  hit  reli- 
gious Operations,  in  many  of  thcfe  Britifh  Colonies,  in 
Places  far  diftant  one  from  another,  in  People  of  many 
different  Nations,  of  difFereat  Educations,  Manners  and 
Cuftoms  ;  one  who  had  peculiar  Opportunity  of  Ac- 
quaintance with  the  falfe  Appearances  and  Counterfeits 
of  Religion  :  One  who  himfelf  was  the  Tnflrument  of  a 
mod  remarkableAwakening,  and  an  exceeding  wonder- 
ful and  abiding  Alteration  and  moral  Transformation  of 
fuch  Subjedls  as  do  peculiarly  render  the  Change  rare  and 
aftonifliing. 

In  the  following  Account,  the  Reader  will  have  Op- 
portunity to  fee,  not  only  what  were  the  external  Cir- 
cumftances  and  remarkable  Incidents  of  the  Life  of  this 
Perfon,  and  how  he  fpent  his  Time  from  Day  to  Day, 
as  to  his  external  Behaviour  •,  butalfo  what  pafs'd  in  his 
own  Heart,  Vat  wonderful  Change  that  he  experienced 
in  his  Mind  and  Difpofition,  the  Manner  in  which  that 
Change  was  bro't  to  pafs,  how  it  continued,  what  were 
it's  Confequences  in  his  inward  Frames,  Thoughts,  Af- 
fedions  and  fecret  Exercifes,  through  many  Vicifiitudes 
and  Trials,  from  thenceforth  for  more  than  eightYears, 
*till  his  Death  ;  and  alfo  to  fee  how  all  ended  at  laft,  in 
his  Sentiments,  Frame  and  Behaviour,  during  a  long 
Seafon  of  the  gradual  and  fenfible  Approach  of  Death, 
under  a  lingring  lllnefs,  and  what  were  the  Effeds  of 
his  Religion  in  dying  Circumftanccs,  or  in  the  laft 
Stages  of  his  dying  llinefs.     The  Account  being  writi- 

^ tej3, 


iV  ne  PREFACMl 

ten,  the  Reader  may  have  Opportunity  at  his  Leifure  to 
compare  the  various  Parts  of  the  Story,  and  deliberately 
to  view  and  weigh  the  whole,  and  confider  how  far 
what  is  related  is  agreeable  to  the  Didlates  of  right  Rea- 
fon  and  the  holy  Word  of  God. 

I  am  far  from  fuppofing,  that  Mr.  Brainerd'%  inward 
Exercifes  andExperiences,  or  his  external  Conduf!-,  were 
free  from  all  Imperfedion  :  TheExample  of  JeJuiCbrifi 
is  the  only  Example  that  ever  was  fee  in  the  human 
Nature,  that  was  altogether  perfedl  ;  which  therefore  is 
a  Rule,  to  try  all  other  Examples  by  ;  and  the  Difpofi- 
tions,Frames,  andPradicesof  others  muft  be  commend- 
ed and  followed  no  further,  than  they  were  Followers 
cf  Cbriji. 

There  is  one  Thing  in  Mr.  Braifterd,QSifi]y  difcerna- 
ble  by  the  following  Account  of  his  Life,  that  may  be 
called  an  Imperfcdion  in  him,  which  tho*  not  properly 
an  Imperfedtion  of  a  moral  Nature,  yet  may  pofiibly  be 
made  anObjedtion  againft  the  extraordinaryAppearanccs 
of  Religion  and  Devotion  in  him,  by  fuch  as  feek  for 
Objections  againft  every  Thing  that  can  be  produced 
in  Favour  of  true  vital  Religion  ;  and  that  is,  that  he 
was  one  who  by  his  Conftitution  and  natural  Temper 
was  fo  prone  to  Melancholy  and  Dejcftion  of  Spirit. 
There  are  feme  who  think  that  all  ferious  ftridlRfligion 
is  a  melancholy  Thing,  and  that  what  is  callcdChriftian 
Experience,  is  little  dk  b&fides  melancholy  Vapours 
difturbing  the  Brain,  and  exciting  cnthufiaftical  Imagi- 
nations. But  that  Mr.  Brainerd's  Temper  or  Confti- 
tution  inclined  him  to  Defpondency,  is  no  jufl  Ground 
to  fufpeft  his  extraordinary  Devotion,  as  being  only  the 
Fruit  of  a  vvarm  Imagination.  I  doubt  not  but  that  ail 
who  have  well  oblervedMankind,  will  readily  grant  this, 
that  it  is  not  all  thofe  who  by  their  natural  Conftitution 
or  Temper  are  moft  difpofcd  to  BejeBion,  (hat  are  the 
Perfons  who  are  the  moft  fufceptive  of  lively  and  ftrong 
Imprcflions  on  their  Imagin^tiong  or  the  moft  fubj^fdlto 

thofe 


rhe  PREFACE.  f 

ihofc  vehement   impetuous  AfFedlions,   which  are  the 
Fruits  of  fuch  Impreffions ;  but  that  many  who  are  of  z 
very  gay  and  /anguine  naturalTcmper  are  vaftly  more  fo, 
and  if  their  AfFedions  are  turned  into  a  religious  Chan- 
nel, are  much   iRore  cxpofed  to  Enthufiafmj  than  many 
of  the  former.     And  as   to  Mr.  Brainerd  in  particular, 
notwichftanding  his  Inclination  toDcfpondency,  he  was 
evidently  one  of  that  Sort  of  Perfons  who  ufualiy^arc  the 
furtheft  from  a  teeming  Imagination  ;  being  one  ©f  a 
penetrating  Genius,  of  clear  Thought,  of  clofe  Reafon- 
ing,  and  a  very  cxa6l Judgment ;  as  all  know,  that  knew 
him.     As  he  had  a  great  Infight  into  human  Nature, 
and  was  very  difcerning  and  judicieus   in  Things  in  ge- 
neral, fo  he  exccird  in  his  Judgment  and  Knowledge  of 
Things  inDivinity,but  efpecially  ihThings  appertaining 
to  inwardcxperimentalRcligion;  moft  accurately  dillin- 
guifhing  between  real  folid    Piety  and  Enthufiafm,  be- 
tween thofe  Affedlions  that  are  rational  and  fcriptural, 
having   their  Foundation  in  Light  and  Judgment,  and 
thofe  that  are   founded   in  whimfical  Conceits,  ftrong 
Imprcffions  on   the  Imagination,   and  thofe  vehement 
Emotions  of   the  animal    Spirits    that  arife  from  them. 
He  was  exceeding  fenfible  of  Men'sExpofcdnefs  to  thefe 
Things,  how  much  they  had  prevailed,  and  what  Mul- 
titudes had    been   deceived  by  them,  of  the  pernicious 
Coafequences  of  them,  and  the  fearfulMifchief  they  had 
done  in  the  Chriftian  World.     He  greatly  abhor'd  fuch 
a  Sort  of  Religion,  and  was  abundant  in  bearing  Tefti- 
mony  againft  it,  living  and  dying  ;  and  was  quick  to 
difcern  when  any  Thing  of  that  Nature  arofe,  tho*  in 
it's  firft  Buddings,  and  appearing   under  the  moft  fair 
and  plaufiblc  Difguifes  ;  and  had  that  Talent  at  defcrib- 
ing  the   various  Workings  of    this   imaginary  Enlbu" 
fiajtical  Religion,  evincing   the  Falfenefs  and  Vanity  of 
It,  and  demonftratiog  the  great  Difference  between  this 
and  true  fpiriiual  Devotion,  which  I  fcarcely  ever  knevr 
equalled  in  any  other  Pcrfon,  '^^^  And  hisjudicioufneft 

did 


Vi  "Ihi   PREFACE. 

did  not  only  appear  in  diftinguifhing  among  the  Expe-^ 
rienccs  of  others^  but  alfo  among  the  various  Exercifes 
of  his  own  Mind  %  and  particularly  in  difccrning  what 
within  himlelf  was  to  be  laid  to  the  Score  o^Mdanchoiy, 
in  which  he  exceeded  ail  melancholy  Perfons  that  ever 
I  was  acquainted  with  (tho'Ihave  been  in  the  Way  of 
Acquaintance  with  very  many  ;  )  which  was  doubtlefs 
owing  to  a  peculiar  Strength  in  his  Judgment :  'Tis  a 
rare  Thing  indeed,  that  melancholy  People  are  well  fen- 
fible  of  their  own  Difeafe,  and  fully  convinced  that  fuch 
and  fuch  Things  are   to  be  afcribed  to  it,  as  are  indeed 

it's  genuine  Operations  and  Fruits. Mr,  Eraineri 

did  not  fjbtain  that  Degree  of  Skill,  which  he  had  in 
this  Matter,  at  once,  but  gain'd  it  gradually  ;  as  the 
Reader  may  difcern  by  the  following  Account  of  his 
Life.  In  the  former  Part  of  his  religious  Courfe,  he 
imputed  much  of  that  Kind  of  Gloomincfs  of  Mind  and 
thofe  dark  Thoughts,  to  fpiritual  Defertion^  which  in 
the  latter  Part  of  his  Life,  he  was  abundantly  fenfible, 
were  owing  to  the  Difeafe  of  Melancholy  ;  accordingly 
he  often  cxprefly  fpeaks  of  them  in  his  Diary  as  arifing 
fromthisCaufe  ;  and  he  was  often  inConverfation  fpeak- 
ing  of  the  Difference  between  Melancholy  and  godly 
Sorrow,  true  Humiliation  and  fpiritual  Defertion,  and 
the  great  Danger  of  miltaking  the  one  for  the  other, 
and  the  very  hurtful  Nature  of  Melancholy,  difcourfing 
with  great  Judgment  upon  it,  and  doubtlefs  much  more 
judicioufly  for  what  he  knew  by  his  own  Experience. 
But  bcfides  what  may  be  argued  from  Mr.  Br<iinerd'5 
Strength  of  Judgment,  'tis  apparent  in  FaM,  that  he 
was  not  a  Perlbn  of  a  warm  Imagination.  His  inward 
Experiences,  either  in  hisConvidlions  or  his  Converfionj 
and  his  religious  Views  2nd  Impxefiions  thro'  the  Courfe 
of  his  Life  to  his  Death  (  of  which  he  has  left  a  very 
particular  Account )  none  of  them  ^onfifted  in,  or  were 
excited  by,ftrong  and  lively  Images  formed  in  his  Ima- 
gination ^  there  is  nothing  at  all  appears  of  it  in  his 

Diarj^ 


nt  PREFACE.  vii 

Diary^  from  Bcgirinirg  fo  End  :  Ye;»,  he  told  me  on 
hisDeath  Bed,  that,  alvho'  once  when  hf  was  very  ycung 
in  Years  and  in  Experience^he  was  deceived  into  a  high 
Opinion  (jffuch  Thirgs,  looking  on  them  as  fuperiour 
Atrainments  in  Religion,  beyond  what  he  had  ever 
arrived  to,  and  was  ambitious  of  them  and  earneftly 
fought  them,  yet  he  never  could  obtain  them  •,  and  that 
he  never  in  his  Life  had  a  ftrong  ImprelHon  on  his  Ima- 
ginaiion,  of  any  V.fage,  outward  Form,  external  Glory, 
or  any  other  Thing  of  that  Nature  ;  which  Kind  of 
Impreffions  abound  among  the  wild  enthufiaftic  Peo- 
ple of  the  late  and  prcfent  Day, 

As  Mr.  Brainerdh  Religious  Impreffions,  Views  and 
Aff^cStions  in  theirNature  were  vaftly  different  fromEn- 
thufiahn,  fo  were  their  EffeEls  in  him  as  contrary  as 
poffibie  to  the  ordinary  hfieds  of  that.  Nothing  fo 
puffs  Men  up,  as  Enthufiajm^  with  a  high  Conceit  of 
their  own  Wil'dom,  Holinefs,  Eminency  and  Sufficien- 
cy, and  makes  'em  fo  bold,  forward,  affuming,  and 
arrogant  :  But  the  Reader  will  fee,  that  Mr.  Braimrd'% 
Religion  condantly  difpofed  him  to  a  molt  meanTho'c 
of  himfelf,  an  abafing  Senfe  of  his  own  exceeding  Sin- 
fulnefs.  Deficiency,  Unprcfitabienefs,  and  Ignorance  ; 
looking  on  himfelf  as  worfe  than  others  ;  difpoiing  him 
to  univcrfai  Benevolence,  Meeknefs,  and  m  Honour  to 
prefer  others,  and  to  treat  all  with  Kindnefs  andRefpedi:, 
And  when  Melancholy  prevailed,  tho'  the  Efffdls  of  it 
were  very  prejudicial  lo  him, yet  it  had  notthofeEffeds  of 
Enth>:fi^Jm  ;  but  operated  by  dark  and  difcouraging 
Thoug()i.s  of  himfelf,  as  ignorantj  wicked  and  wholly 
Unfit  for  the  Work  of  the  Mini  dry,  or  even  to  be  feca 

among  Mankind,  ^c,  Indeed  at  the  Time  fore- 

fnentioned,  when  he  had  not  learn'd  well  to  diftinguifh 
bctweenEnthufiafm  &rolidRe]igion,he  joining  and  keep- 
ing Company  with  Lme  that  were  tinged  with  no  fmaJl 
Degree  of  the  former,  for  a  Seafon  partook  wiih  them 
in  a  Degrre  of  their  D.fpoucions  and  Behaviours;  tho* 
as  was  obferved  before,  he  could  nut  obuin  thofcThings 

a  a  wheicin 


^iii  r^e  preface: 

l^herein  their  Enthujiafm  It  felf  confided,  and  {6  could 
tiot  become  like  'em  in  that  Refped,  however  he  ef- 
roncouriy  defired  and  fought  it.  But  certainly  it  is  not 
at  all  to  be  wondered  at,  that  a  Youth  and  a  young 
Convert^  cne  that  had  his  Heart  fo  fwaliowed  up  inRe- 
ligion,  and  fo  earneftly  defired  the  flourifhing  of  ir,  but 
had  had  To  little  Opportunity  for  Reading, Obfervatioa 
find  Experience,  fhould  for  a  while  be  dazzled  and  de- 
ceived with  the  glaring  Appearances  of  that  miftaken 
Devotion  and  Zeal  ;  cfpecially  confidering  what  the 
extraordinary  Circumftances  of  that  Day  were.  He  told 
me  on  his  Death- Bed,  that  while  he  was  in  thefe  Cir- 
cumftances he  was  out  of  his  Element,  and  didViolence 
to  himfelf,  while  complying,  in  his  Condufl,  with  Per- 
fons  of  a  fierce  and  imprudent  Zeal,  from  his  great 
Veneration  of  fome  that  he  looked  upon  much  bettef 
than  himfelf.  So  that  it  would  be  very  unreafonablejthat 
his  Error  at  that  Time  (hould  neverthelefs  be  efteemed 
a  juft  Ground  of  Prv-judice  againft  the  whole  of  his  Re- 
ligion, and  his  Charadter  in  general  •,  efpecially  confi- 
dering, how  greatly  his  Mind  was  foon  changed,  and 
how  exceedingly  he  afterwards  lamented  his  Error,  and 
abhor'd  himfelf  for  his  imprudentZealandMifcondud  at 
that  Time,  even  to  the  breaking  of  his  Heart,  and  al- 
moft  to  the  overbearing  and  breaking  theStrength  of  his 
Nature  %  and  how  much  of  a  Chriftian  Spirit  he  (hew- 
ed, in  his  condemning  himfelf  for  that  Mifconduft,  as 
the  Reader  will  lee. 

What  has  been  now  mentioned  cf  Mr.  Bra!r,erd,h  fo 
far  from  being  jtifl  Ground  of  Prejudice  again  ft  what  is 
related  in  the  following  Account  of  his  Life,  that,  if 
duly  confidcred,  it  will  render  the  Hiftory  the  more 
Ssrviceabie,  For  by  his  thus  joining  for  a  Seafon  with 
Enthufia^s.ht  had  a  more  full  &  intimateAcquaintance 
with  what  belonged  to  thatSort  of  Religion,  and  fo  was 
under  better  Advantages  to  judge  of  the  Difference  be- 
tween that,and  the  other,  which  he  finally  approved  and 
drove  to  his  utmoft   to  promote,    in  Oppofuioa  to  it : 

And 


The  PREFACE.  H 

And  hereby  the  Reader  has  the  more  to  demonflrate  to 
him,  that  Mr.  Brainerd  in  his  Tellimony  againft  it  and 
the  Spirit  and  Behaviour  of  thofe  that  are  influenced  by 
it,  fpeaks  from  impartial  Ccnvidlion,  and  not  from  Pre- 
judice ;  becaufe  therein  he  openly  condemns  his  own  for- 
mer Opinion  and  Condud,  on  Account  of  which 
he  had  greatly  fuffcred  from  hisOppofers,and  for  which 
fome  continued  to  Reproach  him  as  long  as  he  lived. 

Another  Imperfection  in  Mr.  Brainerd,vi\\\ch  maybe 
obferved  in  the  following  Account  of  his  Life,  was  his 
being  eitcejftve  in  his  Labours  ;   not  taking  due  Care  to 
Proportion   his  Fatigues  to  his   Strength.     Indeed  the 
Cafe  was  very  often  fo,   and  fuch  the  feeming  Calls  of 
Providence,   that  it  was  extremely  difficult  for  him  to 
avoid  doing  more  than  his  Strength  would  well  admic 
of;  yea,   his  Circumftances,  and  the  Bufinefs  of  his 
Mifiion  among  the  Indians,    were  fuch,  that  great  Fa-^ 
tigues  and  Hardffiips  were  altogether  inevitable.   How- 
ever, he  was  finally  convinced,  that  he  had  err'd  in  this 
Marrer,  and  that  he  ought  to  have  taken    more  thoro* 
Care,  and  been  more  refolute  to  withftand  Temptations 
to  fuch  Degrees  of  Labour  as  injur'd  his  Health  ;  and 
accordingly  warned  his  Brother^   who   fucceeds   him  in 
his  Miflion,  to  be  careful  to  avoid  this  Error. 

Befides  thelmperfedions  already  mentioned,  it  is  rca^ 
dily  allowed,  that  there  were  fome  Imperfeftions  that 
ran  through  his  whole  Life,  and  were  mixed  with  all 
his  religious  Affedions  and  Exercifes,  fome  Mixture  of 
what  was  natural  with  that  which  was  fpiritual  ',  as  it 
evermore  is  in  the  bed  Saints  m  this  World.  Doubtlefs 
there  was  fome  Influence  that  natural  Temper  had  in  the 
religious  Exercifes  and  Experiences  of  Mr.  Brainerd^^% 
there  moft  apparently  was  in  the  Exercifes  of  devout 
David,  and  the  Apoftles  Peter,  John  and  Paul;  There 
-was  undoubtedly  very  often  fome  Influence  of  l;ii§  natural 
Difpofition  to  Dejedion  in  his  religious  Mourning,fom@ 
Mixture  of  Melancholy  with  truly  godly  Sorrow  and  real 
Cbriftian  Humility,  and  fome  Mixture  of  the  natural 

a  a  a  f  iJ^e 


X  T^e  P  RE  F  AC  E. 

Fire  oF  Youth  with  bis  holy  Zeal   for  God,   and  fome 
Influence  of  n.itural  Principles  mixM  with  Grace  in  va- 
rious other  Refpeds,  as  it  ever  was  and  ever  wil!  be  with 
the  Saints    while   on  this  Side   Heaven.      Perhaps  none 
were  more  fenfibie  of  Mr.  BrainercTs  Imperfedions  than 
hehimfelf;  or  could  difl:inguifh  more  accurately,   than 
he,    between  what  was  natural   and  what  was    Ip^ritual. 
*Tis  eafy  for  the  judicious  Reader  to  oblerve,    that  his 
Graces  ripen'd,  and  the  religious  Exercifes  of  his  Heart 
became   more  and  more  pure,  and   he   more  and  more 
diftinguiHiing    in   his  Judgment,    the  longer  he  liv'd  : 
He  had  much  to  teach  and  purify  him,and  he  failed  not 
to  make  his  Advantage  thereby. 

But  notwithftanding  all  thefe  imperfedions,  lam  per- 
fwaded,  every  pious  and  judicious  Reader  will  acknow- 
ledge, that  what  is  here  let  btfore  him  is  indeed  a  re- 
markable Inftance  of  true  and  eminent  Chriftian  Pictv  in 
Heart  and  Pravftice  ;  tending  greatly  to  conrirm  theReali- 
ty  of  vital  Religion  and  the  Power  of  Godlinefs,  moil 
v/orthy  of  Imitation,  and  many  Ways  tending  to  the 
fpiritua!  Bcnefic  of  the  careful  Obferver. 

Tis  fit,  the  Reader  fliould  be  avvsre,  that  what  Mr* 
Brainerd  wrote  in  his  7D/V?rv,  out  of  which  tl^e  following 
Account  of  his  L'Fe  is  chiefly   taken,  was  written  only 
for  his  own  private  Ull%  and  not   to    get  Honour  and 
Applaufe  in  the  World,    nor  with   any  Defign  that  the 
World  fliould  ever  fee   ir,  eitlier  while  he  lived  or  after 
his  Death,  excepting  fome  few  Things  that  he  v/rote  in 
a  dying  State,  after  he  had  been  perfwaded  (vvith  Diffi- 
culty) not  entirely  to  fdpprefs  all  his  private  Writings. 
He  fliewed  himfclf  almod  invincibly  averfe  to  the  Ptib- 
lifljing  of  any  Part  of  hisD/"rv  after  hjsDeath  ;  and  when 
he  was  thought  to   be    dy !-;.[<  at  Rofton^    pave  the  moft 
find  peremptory  Orders  to  the  Contrary  :  but  being  by 
fome  of   his  Friends  tliere  prevailed  upon  to  withdraw 
fo  ftrid  and  abfolure  a  Prohibition, he  was  pleafed  finally 
to  yield  {o  far  as  that  bisP.'ip'rs  /boutd  he  left  in  myHands^ 
tbat  I  m'^gbf  difo^fe  of  th:m  a^.  Itbcv^hi.  zvould  be  mofl  fcr 


^'be  P  RE  F  AC  E^  ^i 

God's  Glory  and  the  Inter  efl  of  Religion  —But  afewDayi 
before  his  Deacii,  he  ordered  Tome  Part  of  his  Diary  to 
be  deftroyed(as  will  afterwards  be  obfervedj  which  ren- 
ders thcAccount  of  hi^Life  the  lefs  comp!eat.  And  there 
are  Tjiiie  Parts  of  hisD/^ryare  here  left  out  for  Brevity's 
Sake,  that  would  ( 1  am  fenfible)  have  been  a  great  Ad- 
vantage to  the  Hiftory,  if  they  had  been  inferted  ;  par- 
ticularly the  Account  of  his  wonderful  SuccefTes  among 
the  Indians  ;  which  for  Subftance  is  the  fame  in  his  pri- 
vate Diary  with  that  which  has  already  been  made  pub- 
lick,  in  the  Journal  he  kept  by.  order  of  the  Society  in 
Scotland^  for  their  Information.  That  Account,  I  am  of 
Opinion, would  be  more  entertaining  and  more  profitable, 
if  ic  were  publifhed  as  it  is  written  in  his  Diary,  in  Con- 
nexion with  his  fccret  Religion  and  the  inward Exercifes 
of  his  Mind,  and  alfo  with  the  preceedingand  following 
Parts  of  the  Story  of  his  Life.  But  becaufe  thatAccounc 
has  been  Publiihed  already,  and  becaufe  the  adding  ic 
here  would  make  the  Book  much  more  bulky  and  more 
cofllyjwhich  m^ght  tend  to  difcourage  the  Purchafe  and 
Pcrufal  of  It,  and  fo  render  it  Irfs  extenlively  ufeful,  I  have 
therefore  omitted  that  Part.  However,  this  Defcd  may 
in  a  great  Meaftire  be  made  up  to  the  Reader,  by  his 
purchcsfiiig  his  poblickJournal.iLnd  reading  it  in  its  Place, 
with  this  Hiftory  of  his  Life  ;  which  undoubtedly  would 
be  well  worth  the  while  for  every  Reader,  and  would 
richly  recompenfe  the  additional  coil  of  the  Purchafe.  I 
hope  therefore,  that  thofe  of  my  Readers  who  are  ejoc 
furniOied  with  that  Book,  will,  for  their  ov/n  Profit  and 
Entertainment,  and  that  they  may  have  the  Story  of  this 
excellent  Perfon  more  compleac,  procure  one  of  thofe 
Books  ;  without  v/nich  he  mufl:  have  a  very  imperfedb 
View  of  the  mod  important  Part  of  his  Life,  and  (  on 
feme  Accounts^  of  the  mofl  remarkable  and  wonderful 
Things  in  it.-- 1  fhould  alfo  obferve,  that  bcfides  that 
Book,  and  antecedent  to  it,  there  is  a  Narrative  relating 
to  the  /wi^/^?-/ Affairs,  annexed  to  Mr. Pemkrlon's  Sermon 
3t  Mr.  Brainerd*s  Ordination  j  which  likewife  may  the 


ri)  rhe  PREFACE. 

more  profitably  be  read  in  Conjundtion  with  his  Diary 
previous  to  Nov.  5.  1 744. 

But  it  is  Time  to  end  this  Preface,  that  the  Reader 
may  be  no  longer  detain'd  from  the  Hiftory  it  fclf. 

JV.  B.  Thofe  Parts  of  the  following  Hiftory,  that  are 
included  between  Brackets  thus  [  J  are  the 
Words  of  the  Publifher^ox  the  moft  Part,  fumma- 
rily  reprefenting  (  for  Brevity's  Sake)  the  fubftance 
or  chief  Things  contained  in  Mr.  iBm«^r^'s  Diary, 
for  fuch  a  certain  Space  of  Time  as  is  there  fpeci- 
fifd  :  The  reft  is  theAccount  that  he  gives  of  him-^ 
felf  in  his  private  Writings,  in  his  own  Words. 

I  prefump,  fcarce  any  Reader  needs  to  be  told,  that 
[  A  Mt.  ]  on  the  top  of  the  Page,  fignifies  ^he 
Tear  of  his  A^e^  and  [  A.  D.  ]  ^he  Tear  of  our 
Lord. 


^l^'^'^l^'^W^hs'ik^mi 


Befides  the  Errqta  at  the  End  of  the  Life,  the  Reader  is  defu'd 
to  corredl  the  following. 

Page  69.  1.  36.  r.  cries,  p.  77.  I.  35.  r.  wringout.  p.  i?2. 1.  3?. 
r.  have  more.  p.  124.  1.  24,  25.  r.  and  often  feel.  p.  128, 
J.  12.  r.  Bleiled  be  God.  p.  154.  I.  16.  r.  Nejhaminy,  p, 
177.  1.  22.  r.  any  Spirit,  p.  311.  J,  14.  r,  to  a^it.  p.  315, 
J.  29.  r.  tfckea  fiofii. 


si^^ip^sii^^^^sisi8ii^ai^.si^ 


The  Names  of  Subfcribers  to 
the  Rev.  Mr.  i^mw^r^  s  Life. 

Province  of  ihs  Maffachufctts-Bay. 

His  Excellency  Jonathan  Belcker,  Efq;  lace 
Governour  of  the  Majfacbujeits,  now  Govcrnouf 
©f  Newjerfey, 

The  Hon.  Sir  William  Pepperrell,  Baronee, 


A 

HOn.  JohnAIford, 
Erq; 
Daniel  App]eton,Erq; 
Rev.  Nafh.  Appleion 
Rev.  Hull  Abbot 
Rev.  J  )reph  Afhley 
Joffph  Appleton 
i>amuel  Adams,  A.M. 
Capt.  William  Ayres 
Capt.  J^ob  Abbot 
Aaron  Auftin 
Elifha  Allis 
Jofeph  Alien 
bamuel  Adams 
Samuel  Adams,  jun, 
David  Adams 
John  Applen 
Capt.  Noah  Afhley 
Rictiard  Atweli 
IS/lz-y  Aufiin 
Samuel  Allen 
John  Adams 
Feter  Adams 
irrae)  Afhley 
John  Afhley 
Benjamin  AuftiD 
Sarah  Alien 


B 

HOn.  Tho.  Berry 
Efq; 
Hon.  Sylv.BournEfq; 
Rev.  John  Barnard 
Andrew  Burley,  Efq; 
Rev.  Daniel  Blifs 
Rev.  Thomas  Balch 
Rev.  Simon  Bradftreet 
Edward  Bromfield 
John  Barret 
Jeremiah  Belknap 
Jofeph  Be'knap 
Jer.  Belknap  jun. 
Thomas  Baxter 
Mary  Bennet 
Thomas  Bromfield 
Epharim  Brown 
John  Bearton 
John  Barnard 
Jonathan  Burt 
Fellows  Billings 
Reuben  Belding 
Jofeph  Billings 
Jofeph  Bacon 
Preferved  Bartlet 
Jofeph  Baldwin 
Elkanah  Bun 


Samuel  Brett 
Capt.  —  -  Browrt 
Samuel  Bancroft  juR« 
Abigail  Beck 
Mofes  Bradfireet 
Spencer  Bennet 
VViiiiam  Brown  jun< 
Samuel  Bafs 
John  Bjllentinc 
Cotton  Bradbury 
Jofeph  B  agdon  jun« 
Tabitha  Hragdon 
Samuel  Bragdon 
Jeremiah  Hragdon 
Ivlary  Rulman 
Ifraei  Butler 
Jofeph  f^iCiop 
Jofeph  nucklin 
William  Browa 
Jacob  hurgis 
Jaccib  Barnev 
Edward  f:lake 
Grmfill  Blake 
James  Brigs 
WiiliamBrettuf 
John  Brigs 
James  Bliike 

David 


Suhfcrihsrs  Names* 


Benjamin  Blancy 
David  Blood 
William  Bartlet 
Jobn  Bulkley 
Jofliua  Barton 
Kobcft  BJake 
Samuel  Blifs 
Stephen  Badger 
fienjamin  Belknap 
Samuel  Bafcumb 
David  Biair 
Daniel  Bucknam 
Noah  Brooks 
Jonathan  Baker 
JonaihanBakcr 
C 

HOnJohnChand- 
Icr,  Efq; 
Hon.Ez.ChecveiEfq; 
Jolhua  CheeverjEfq; 
Rev.  Ames  Cheever 
Rev.  Peter.Cjark 
Joh.   Ghoatc,  Efq; 
Roland  Cotton,  Efq; 
Jonas  Clark,  Efq; 
Rev.  Sam.  Checkley 
Berj.  Crocker  M.  A. 
Rev.  AaronCicveland 
Rev.  Samuel  Cooper 
Rev.S.  Check'ey.jun 
Rev.  JamesChandler 
Rev.  John  Chandler 
Rev.  Jofiah  Crocker 
Rev.  SvlvanusConan 
Berj.  Church, M. A, t 
Capt.  John  Codman 
Nathan  Cheever 
^Villiam  Cooper 
The  mas  Cufliing 
John  Call 
Ralph  (rofs 
Richard  Cary 
Bejanmin  Chapin 


John  Chamberlain 
Capt.  Mofes  Curtii 
John  Clement 
E  eazer  Clark 
Blilha  Cook 
Noah  Cook,  juHt 
David  V.  iark 
Charles  Clap 
Selah  Clark 
Ithamar  Clark 
Eliphalet  Clap 
Jofiah  Clark,  jun. 
Mofes  Clark 
Daniel  Clark 
Aaron  Cook 
Jofiah  V  hauncey 


D 

HOn.  Sara,  l>^r\' 
forth,  E.'q; 
Hon.Jor.DwighfEiq; 
Timoihv  DwightEfq; 
WiliiamDownCjEfq; 
Rev.  Jufeph  Davis 
btephen  Dean 
Samuel  Dtming 
John  Dcming 
Nathaniel  Davis 
C  apt.  Eliphalet  Day 
Col. Thomas  Dunnell 
Hannah  Dyer 
Simeon  Dwight 
John  Deman 


apt   JonathanClark  (  hriflopher  Dyer 


Eliakim  Claik 

Jofiah  Clark 

John  Clap 

Jofeph  Clark 

JiaacChild 

Samuel  Colburn 

Abraham  Cumings 

Jofeph  C  apron 

bamuel  Cufhman 

Cap^Elca. Carpenter  Samuel  Dakin 

Benjamin  C  rabtree      Be/j^minDay 

John  Crabtree  bamuel  \^^\ 

James  Coding  Ephraim  Dean 

Nathaniel  Carver         David  Deaa 

Samuel  C  afwell  Ei*j.h  Dean 

C  apt.  Thomas  Cobb  Ebenezer  Dean 


William  Dunning 
Ifaac  Dodge 
Ezekiel  Dodge 
Samuel  Dwighc 
Obadiah  Dickinfun 
John  Dckiffon 
Thomas  Dickmron 
Jonathan  Dickmfon 
Azariah  Dickinfcn 


Eber.ezer  Crane 
J>  fiuh  Lonnant 
Jfrael  Cheever 
John  Croxford 
Stephen  Crawfoot 
Laniberton  K  6oper 
Z  chcus  Crocker 
Ebcnezer  Child 
Jonathan  Church 
Mofts  Coffin, 


John  Dexter. 
£ 

REv.  JofEmerfcn 
Rev.  Andr.Eiiot 
Rev.  Jofliua  Eitcn 
RevJor.Emerfon,jun;.. 
Andrev!'  Eliot 
iJrt'Wn  Emerfon 
Jacob  Emmcna 
Jofeph  Edwards 


Suhfcrikrs  Namssl 


Bf  rj  min  Edwards 
Jchfi  Eli 
Samue!  Edwards 
Jofir.h  £  Ton 
Joi.isr:.ja  £veret. 
F 

HOu.  Frances  F.  x 
cra't  Efq 
Bc.i.Wm  Fo,t,K(q, 
JohnFairwearhci  k  q; 
Rev.  John  Fox 
Rev.  Tho.  Fcxcroft 
John  Fuller,  Efq; 
William  Fenwick 
William  Fairfield 
Andrew  Frifwel 
James  Fofter 
Samuel  Frothlngham 
Ebenezer  Fifher 
James  Fofdick 
Phil'p  Freeman 

iofeph  Fofter 
lalph  Farnam 
Matthew  Farnam 
Jofeph  Farnam 
Grafton  Feveryear 
Benjamin  Fofter 
ElifoaFifh 
Eli  Forbufh 
Obadiah  Frary 
Jacob  French 
John  Field 
Gerflinm  Fletcher 
Ifaae  Farnfworfh 
Timothy  Fuller 
Edward  Foftgr 
Jonathan  Freeman 
^tephen  Fu!;er 
Jonathan  Fox 
Jabez  Fifher 
JEbenezer  Freefe. 
G 

HOii.  Tohn  Green 
reafc,  Ef^i 


Rev.Dan.Greenleafe  Rev.Samjuel  Mopkint 
David  Goiham   Efqi  Rev.  Abraham  Hill 
Rev.  Ebe«itzer  Gay    R^v.^hi  Hemingway 


Rev    Elias  Haven 
Ab  ah  Hvlbrook 
J<  hn  Hiilier 
Capt.  J  hn  Harmon 
Capt.  Dan.  Ha V  ward 


Rev.  Ellis  Gray 

Rev.  J.  hn  Graham 

John  Greeiileafe 

Jofeph  Green 

iamuel  Grant 

L  enjamin  Greenleafe  Reuben  Hermon 

J.mes  Grten  Daniel  Hubbard 

.-.mucl  Green  Aaron  H.chcock 

Ezekiel  Goluthwait    Enoch  Holcomb 

Thomas  Greenough    bimon  Hunt 

BenjaminGoldthwait  John  Hammond 


Abicl  Goodwin 
Daniel  Grove 
Robert  Garden 
JabtzGay 
William  George 
Jofeph  Gilifen 
Benjamin  Gott 
James  Grey 
Edward  Goodwin 
Samuel  Gay  ford 
John  Gunn 
Ebenezer  Guild 
Robert  Grev 
Chauncey  Graham 
Robert  Grey 
Ichabod  Ooodin. 
H 


Lawrence  Hart 
Nehemiah  Hall 
David  HalJ 
Stephen  Hofking 
William  Hodges 
Jofeph  Hall 
Abigail  Hall 
Jofeph  Hall,  jun. 
William  Hack 
John  Hall 

Shad.  Hathway  M.A« 
Jacob  Hayward 
Thomas  Hayward 
Nehemiah  Hobart 
Jofeph  Hews 
Nath  Healy 
Aaron  Haws 
Capt.  Eli&a  Hedge 


OOn.  Ed.  Hutch^ 

*-  -*•  infon,  Elqj  Jonathan  Hale 

Edw.Holyoke,  Prefi.  John  Hacks 

of  Harvard-College  Stephen  Hall 
Robert  Hale,  Etq;       Elifha  Hill 
ThomasHubbariiEfq  Henry  Hayward 
ThomasHancockE%  Samuel  Waven 
John  Hill,  Efq;  MofesHale 

Edw.Hayward,  Efq;  Benjamin  Holt 
Rev.  NathHincbman  Nehemiah Harrendsn 
Rev.  William  Hobby  Jofeph  Holt 
Rev.  Ivory  Hovey      Caleb  Hopkins 

a  a  a  John 


John  Harburt 
William  Homes 

iofeph  Hidden 
;phraim  Hayward 
John  Hart 
John  Hay 
Nicholas  Hopping 

John  Hancock 
tenjamin  Hurd,  jun^ 
Aaron  Hutchinfon. 


Suijcrlhers  Kamssl 
L 

HOn  EzekielLewis 
Efq; 
Hon.GeoLeonardElq 
Jofeph  Lemmon  Efq; 
Samuel  Leonard, Efq; 
Rev.  Dudley  Leavit 
ThomasLambertEfq; 
Maj.  Zeph.  Leonard 
Caleb  Lyman 
Noah  Lyman 
Gad  Lyman 


I 

HOn. John  Jeffries,  Elias  Lyman 
Efq;  Caleb  Lampfon 
Thomas  Jenner,Erq;  Samuel  Lord 
Rev.  Jedidiah  Jewet   John  Langdon 
Rev.  Samuel  JefFcrdg  Ebenezer  Little 


Rev.  Ifaac  Jones 
Rev.  Jonathan  Judd 
Thomas  Judd 
Samuel  [ones 

Jonathan  Ingram 
lenjamin  Ingott 
Daniel  JohnfoB 
£Ii  Ingraham 
John  Johnfon 
iiamuel  Johnfon 
Edward  Ingraham. 
K 


EdwardLangdonjun, 
Jofeph  Lyman 
Ifaac  Lyman 
William  Lyman 
Nathaniel  Lewis 
Robert  Lufcomb 
Jabez  Lothrop 
James  Leonard 
Jonathan  Lincoln 
Jonathan  Lilley 
James  Leland 
Jeremiah  Lawrence 


'Amuel  KentjEfq;  John  Longley,  jun. 


*^Rev.  Sam.Kcndall  Pclcg  Lawrence 
John  Knight  Ebenezer  Lane 

John  Kneeland 
John  Kneeland,  jun 
Jonathan  Kettle 


William  Kettle 
Dudley  Kent 
Samuel  Kinfley 
David  Kennedy 
Bcnjaroin  King 
Ebenezer  Kendall 
John  Kendall 
Nathaniel  Kimball 
RicharH  Kimball 
Caleb  Kimball. 


Capt.Eliph.  Leonard 
John  Littlefield 
John  Littlelieldj  jun. 
Daniel  Little 
Jofeph  Low 
William  Lam^on 
Jofeph  Lord 
Robert  Lawtiidge 
Ebenezer  Luce. 

M 
LjOn.Jer.  Moulton 
hr  q; 
HonJamesMin»iE'q 


Rev.  Hen.  MciTengcr 
DanielMouIton,Efq5 
Capt,  Jer.  Moulton 
Rev.  John  Moorhead 
Rev.Thad.  Maccarty 
Tim.  Minot  M.  A. 
Daniel  Marfh 
Buriah  Man 
Capt.  EleazerMelvin 
Capt.  SamMountagu 
James  Mears 
Mofes  Marfh 
Richard  Millberry 
Samuel  Marih 
Ebenezer  Marfh  jun* 
Daniel  Marfli 
John  Mountagu 
Jonathan  Moody 
Edward  Mackard 
John  Mitchcl 
Michael  Metcalf 
John  Mountgomerj 
Benjamin  Mors 
Moody  Mora 
John  Mudge 
Sarah  Martyn 
Richard  Martyn 
Gerfhom  Makepelce 
Nathaniel  Metcalf 
Cutting  Moody 
Samuel  Millberry 
Jofeph  Main 
Robert  Martyn 
Michael  Metcalf 
Samuel  Meriam 
Edward  Martindale. 
N 

FRancis  Nicholfon 
Afa  Noble 
Thomas  Norton 
Daniel  Novcc 
Jonathan  Nichols 
John  Nichols 
John  Noyce  9 


Suhfcribers  Namesl 


O 

XJOnJohnOiborn, 
51  Efq; 

Hon.Andr.OlivcrEfq 
William  Owen 
Jonathan  Oakes. 
P 

HOnJof.Pynchon 
Efq; 
John  Phillips,  Efq; 
Timothy  Prout,  Efq; 
Rev.  Thomas  Prince 
Charles  Pcirce,  Efq; 
01iverPartridge,Erq; 
Samuel  Pool,  Efq; 
Thomas  Pain,  M.  A. 
Rev.  Samuel  Phillips 
Rev.  Jona.  Parfons 
Rev.  Tho.  Prentice 
Rev.  Solo.  Prentics 
Rev.  John  Porter 
Rev.  Eben.  Parkman 
Rev.  John  Parker 
Rev.  Mofes  Parfons 
Rev.  Samuel  Porter 
Charles  Phelps 
Martin  Phelps 
Elifha  Pomroy 
William  Phillips 
SamPhillipsjun.M.A. 
Mofes  Peck 
Elidii  Pomroy 
John  Perry 
Benjamin  Parker 
William  Prefect 
James  Pullen 
William  Pullen 
Abiel  Packard 
Lydia  Packard 
James  Packard 
Ifaac  Packard 
Ebenczer  Pitts 
Petsr  Pf^tt 


John  Pickens 
Zechariah  Padeford 
Cornelius  Putrtam 
Jacob  Parker 
Eleazar  Pearce 
Jjhn  Parker 
Jeraihmeel  Pierce 
Jofeph  Phipps 
Elijah  Phipps 
Lemuel  Powers 
Edward  Putnam 
Stephen  Prentice 
John  PearfoR 
John  Powers 
Jofiah  Putnam 
Nathan  Peabody 
Timothy  Prat 
Jofeph  Parker 
Jacob  Porter 
Thomas  Payne 
John  Prober 
Daniel  Pomroy 
Ifaac  Parfons 
Jofuh  Parfons 
Jacob  Parker 
William  Patten. 

Q. 

HOn.  John  Qiiin- 
cy,  Efq; 
R 

HOn.DanielRufTel 
Efq; 
Syl V.Richmond,  Efq; 
Rev.  Nath.  Rogers 
Ifaac  Royal,  Efq; 
Rev.  Solomon  Reed 
Capt.  Obadiah  Reed 
Capt.  William  Reed 
Jofeph  RobertsM.A" 
Jofeph  Robey,  M.A. 
James  Rankin 
John  Robbing 
Noah  Robinfon 
&  a  a^s 


Daniel  Reed 
Benjamin  Rockwood 
Ifaac  Rand 
Nathaniel  Rand 
George  Robinfon 
Thomas  Rich 
Jacob  Reed 
James  Reed 
John  Robbins 
Simeon  Root. 
S 

REvJof.SewallD.® 
Rev.  Nath.Stone 
Samuel  Sewall,  Efq; 
John  Storer,  Efq; 
Jofeph  Sawyer,  ECe^i 
John  Steel,  Efqj 
Nathaniel  StonCjEfq; 
Rev.  John  Shaw 
Rev.  Nathan  Stone 
Capt.EbenezerStorer 
Jofeph  Sherburn 
Malachi  Salter 
John  Symmes 
John  Scollay 
Capt.  Edward  Sheaf 
Samuel  Phil.  Savage 
Thomas  Symmes 
Zechariah  Symmes 
Abigail  Stevens 
Capt.Jonatii,  Sheldon 
Jonathan  Sheldon  jun, 
Elijah  Sheldon 
Obadiah  Smith 
Thomas  Smith 
Samuel  Smith 
Ichabod  Strong 
Noah  Strong 
Caleb  Strong 
Eliflia  Scarl 
Caleb  Sheldon 
Elizabeth  Strong 
Jqha  §  trickled 

Sim 


Sulfcrihers  Namssl 


Samuel  Sm'th 
Daniel  '^m  th 
Aaron  Smith 
Conftant  Southwor*h 
^echanah  Snell 
Ma* hew  Smi:h 
Simon  Slocomb 
Benj;»mjn  Slack 
Ruh  Slack 
Noah  Sabin 
Simue!  Shackley 
Capt.  J.ihn  btevens 
John  btifd 
Jeremiah  Shuttack 
John  .'i wallow 
John  SpafFjrd 
John  Scott 
Thomas  Strowbridge 
Samuel  Samner 
NathanieiSnell  M.A. 
Capr.  JohnStockwell 
John  btoekwell  jun, 
William  Shepard 
Francis  Stratien 
Richard  Stratcen 
S;ephenSewa!!,M,A. 
Michael  Shute 
Abraham  Smiih 
Ifaac  Sm;;h 
Be  j  min  v^mith 
J  h:i  Smith 
ifaac  Smith  j UP. 
Sp.muel  Sari^ent 
Dsniel  Shaw 
Jofeph  Swain 
James  SavwarJ 
i^amuel  Sewall 
Jiamuel  Sewall,  jun. 
S.^mne!  Sewall,  Ter- 
Benjjmm  Stone 
Jonarhan  Savward 
jofeph  Simi:\fan,  jji), 
Benjaaiifl  ^Uak 


Ruth  Slack 
Thomas  Stanley 
Luke  St  bbins 
Elhanan  Spear 
Jofeph  Swain. 
T 

OXenbridge  That- 
cher, Efq; 
Rev.  Samuel  Tobey 
Rev.  Row).  Thacher 
Rev.  f'eter  Thacher 
William  Thjmfon 
Maj.  Na'h.  Thwing 
Jofeph  Torry 
Richard  Thompfon 
Stephen  Titcomb 
Samuel  Treadwel! 
William  Thomas 
Henry  True 
Peter  Thayer 
Gerftiom  Tinney 
Archibald  Thomas 
Ifrael  T.fdale 
John  Tifdale 
Birth'^Iemew  Town 
John  Town 
bolomon  Townfend 
David  Trail 
Divid  Taylor 
Richard  T.ippen 
Timofhv  T^ppen 
Samuel  Tiicon^b 
Cjpc.  Samuel  Tyler 
Capt. Samuel  Tingley 
J  mcs  Tillfon 
John  Titus 
William  Tenill 
VVigplefsvorthTapen 
Mofes  Turtle 
Eld^Tavior. 

U 
J-lUgh  V.^s 
Jabez  Upham 


Richard  Upham 
Nathaniel  Upbara< 

W 
J^On.    Jofiah  Wil- 
lardjE.q; 
Hon.  Jacob  Wendell, 
Efq; 
Hon.Sam.Welles.Eiq 
Hon. S'.m.  Watts  Efq; 
Rev.  Edward    Wig- 
glefworth,  D.  Di 
Rev.  Nehe.    Walter 
Edward  Winflow, Efq 
l\ev.  Jeremiah  Wife 
Pev.  Wm.  Williami 
Jefhu  a  W  mfloWjEfq; 
Rev. Samuel  Wigglef- 
worth, 
Niihum  Ward,  Efqj 
Rev.  John  Webb 
Rev.  Abjah  Weld 
Rev.  John  Walts 
Rer.  J  hn  W.'cv 
RevChefter  Wjjjj.pns 
Peleg  Wfvvall  A.M. 
Ifaac  Walker 
Jan.uhan   Wills 
Thr>m?is  Wait 
John  Winflow 
John  Weft 
Daniel  Wair 
Capt.  D^vid  Wyer 
David  Wood 
Thomas  Wood 
Bezaliel  Wilder 
Jofeph  Whitney 
Jonathan  Wells 
Thomas  Wyer 
Stephen  Wright 
Oliver  Warner 
Jofliua  Wells 
Nathaniel  Wells 
Icabod  Ward 

Artcmii 


Suhfcrihers  Names'^ 


Arteroas  Ward 
Benjamin  White 
Jeremiah  Whipple 
Nathaniel  Whitney 
Benjamin  Wheeler 
Francis  Wheeler 
Nath.  Whiftemore 
Hezekiah  Ward 
Obadiah  Walker 
Sarah  Williams 
Simeon  Williams 
James  Walker 


Peter  Walker 
Ifaac  Whitney 
Nath.  Williams 
Abiel  Williams 
Jofiah  Waters 
William  Whitwell 
Jonathan  White 
John  W^)ods 
Ifaac  Woods 
Obadiah  Wright 
James  Wilfon 
Jonathan  Wheelock 


OHver  Waffon 
Ebeneier  War;eit 
John  Watfon,jun. 
Joibam  Walton 
Jabcz  Weaze 
John  Whiting 
Jonathan  Whiting 
Jofhua  Winter 
Ephraim  Weffen. 
Y 
Enajah  Young. 


B 


COLONTOF  CONNECTICUTT. 


CHrlftopherAvory, 
Efg; 

Capt.  John  Avered 
Abraham  Avery 
John  Allen 
Jofliua  Avered 
Jofeph  Allen 
Jafon  Allen 
Richard  Andrews 
Jofeph  Arnold 
Enoch  Arnold 
Samuel  Andrews 
John  Abbie 
Phillip  Abbot 
Samuel  A(hley,  jun. 

B 
•T*Heophilus  Bald- 
-*  win,  Efq 

Col.  AaronBrownfon 
William  Buel,  Efq; 
J^hn  B  y^%    Erq; 
ii^muel  B  iffet,  Efq; 
Rev.  Wm.  B'jrnham 
Rev.  Jofeph  Bellamy 
Rev.  Gef»,  B^ckwith 
Ecv.  Nchcm,  Barker 


Jofeph  Bird,  Efq; 
RevDan  Buckingham 
Capt.  [onathanBaker 
Capr.  fohn  Bebee 
Timothy  Brownfon 
Richard  Brownfon 
Matthew  Bellamy 
MatlhewBdlamyjun. 
Samuel  Bellamy 
Abel  Bains 
Jonathan  Benedick 
Thomas  Benedick 
Thomas  Betts 
Ifaac  Brownfon 
Jofiah  B:own(on 
Thomas  Brownfon 
James  Baldwin 
Jofiah  Bjmb 
James  Bradford 
H;z 'kiah  B  ITel 
Daniel  Butt 
Ebenezer  Balch 
Capt.  Samuel  Bebee 
Enoch  Bayer 
Benjamin  Baldwin 
Theophilus  Baldwin 
Benjamin  Blackman 
Ichabpd  Brown 


Jonathan  Brownfon 
The»p.  Baldwin  jun* 
Jonathan  Billings 
Jonathan  Bradford 
Pclatiah  BHfs 
William  Bennet 
Capt.  Samuel  Bifhop 
Samuel  Batl 
Ebenezer  Baldwin 
Nathaniel  Brown 
Mofes  tarret 
Elijah  Belcher 
Jonathan  Brewfter 
Samuel  Branch 
Benjamin  Blogget 
Tho.  Benedick,  jut!. 
James  Baldwin 
Abraham  Bennet 
Caleb  Baldwin 
Jonathan  Botsford 
Jacob  Bunee 
James  Bebee 
Abel  Beech 
Jonathan  Burr 
Noah  Baldwin 
Joel  Baldwin 
Nathaniel  Brownfon 
,  Charles  Brownfon 

Nath, 


Suhfcrihers  "Names. 


William  Bebce 
Daniel  Brainerd 
Azar  Beech 
Jonathan  Badger 
Jonathan  Bingham 
Jofeph  Bingham 
Malichi  Butler 
Solomon  Bill 
OlivcrBrcwftcr. 
C 

COL— ConantEfq; 
Maj  Samuel  Colt 
Jofeph  Clark,  Efqj 
Rev  ThomasCanficld 
John  Crery,  E^q; 
Capt.  Eleazer  Carey 
Jofiah  Conant 
Jofeph  Clark 
Hczekiah  Camp 
Charles  Chopen 
Nathaniel  Compalk 
James  Ciap 
John  Comftock 
ZebadiahComftock 
Samuel  Comftock 
Gideon  Comftock 
JohnCopp 
Nathaniel  Cufhman 
Deindams  Curtifs 
J«nathan  Cafs 
Nathaniel  Cone 
Jofeph  Cone 
John  Church 
Capt.  Samuel  Cowles 
Matthew  Cole 
George  Clark,  AM. 
Matthew  Cadwell 
Capt.  Tho.  Curtifs 
Ebcnezer  Coe 
Azariab  Curtifs 
Jofeph  Clark 
Eleazer  Clark 
Daniel  Curtifs 


Obadiah  Cook 
Jonathan  Clark,jun, 
Seih  Cutler 
John  Clark 
Benjamin  Chaplin 
BcnjaminChaplinjun. 
Samuel  Coburn. 

D 

ELiphalct  Dyer, 
Efq; 
Rev.  MofesDickinfon 
Samuel  Dorrance 
George  Dorrance 
Robert  Denifon 
Avery  Denifon 
Capt.  John  Douglafs 
SethDean,  A.  M. 
William  Dcnifoa 
Adam  Denifon 
Jonathan  Dean 
Ebenezer  Dains 
Jedidiah  Dana 
Abi  Dammon 
Daniel  Dudley 
John  Down 
Eleazer  Dickinfon 
Afa  Douglafs 
Jofiah  Dean 
Jonathan  Devereux 
Nathaniel  Dean 
William  Dean 
Benjamin  Denton 
Benjamin  Duning 
Ebenezer  Downs 
Ebenezer  Dains 
Silas   Doan 
Jedidifah  Dana. 

E 

SAmuel  Emmons 
Ebenezer  Everit 
John  Englilb 


IOfephFowlerjEfij; 
Rev.  Jofeph  Fifh 
Capt.  Benjamin  Fcnn 
Amos  Fuller 
Nathaniel  Fifh 
John  Flower 
Ephraim  Fellows 
Nathaniel  Ford 
William  Farnaia 
Ezekiel  Fox 
Thomas  Fargo 
Stephen  Fuller 
Zebediah  Farnam 
Phineas  Ford 
Eiifha  Fitch 
Pelatiab  Fitch 
Ruth  Fobes 
Simon  Fobei 
Daniel  Fitch 
Jofiah  Finney 
John  Finney 
Abigail  Falmon 
Ebenezer  Fuller 
Samuel  Fielding 
James  Flini 
Matthias  Fuller 
Thomas  Fitch,  juot 
G 

REv.  John  Gra- 
ham 
Math.  Grifwold  Efq; 
Capt.NathanGiddens 
Rev.  Jacob  Green 
Obadiah  Gore 
Jofeph  Gennings 
Henry  Gibbs 
Thomas  Goodwin 
John  Gourdon 
John  Groman 
John  Gillet 
Francis  Guitcau 
Timothy  Goodwin 
Benj. 


Suifcrilers  Names] 


Ebenezer  Grant 
Benjamin  Graves 
Lemuel  Griffin 
Jedidiah  Graves 
iJamuel  Gillet 
Ifaac  Grifworth 
Alexander  Gordon 
Daniel  Gates. 
H 

HOn  Hezek.Hun- 
tingtonjEfq; 
JabezHantingtonEfq 
Rev,  Dan.  Humphry 
Noah  Hinman,  Efq; 
Capt.Ele.Mutchinfon 
John  Hutchinfon 
James  Hanes,  jun, 
Samuel  Hare 
Barnabas  Hall 
Nathaniel  Hall 
William  Holt 
Robert  Holt 
Jofiah  Hammon 
NAthaniel  Hovey 
NathanielHovey  jun. 
Zebediah  Holt 
John  Houfe 
Stephen  Hutchinfon 
Samuel  Houfe 
Lebuit  Harrii 
Ifaac  Higley 
Ifaac  HofFord 
Jafeph  Hinfdcll 
Jofiah  Hurlburt 
i)aniel  Hoffjrd 
Jofiah  Hooker 
Capt.Mofes  Hawkins 
Benjamin  Hicock 
Eleazer  Hinman 
Stephen  Hicock 
Andrew  Hinraan 
Juftus  Hicock 
John  Hovey 


JamesHurlburtM.D. 
Jofhua  Holt 
Paul  Holt 
John  Hibbard 
Henry  Hewit 
Daniel  Holt 
Nehem.  Huntington 
Richard  Hide 
Obadiah  Heath 
David  How 
Robert  Hebard 
Jamei  Mc'Hillhoufe 
Abel  Holbr«ok 
John  Hall 
Nathaniel  Hide 
Jonathan  Hinckley 
Thomas  Harvey 
Jofeph  Huntington 
Jofhua  Hendie 
Chrifto.  Huntington 
Reuben  Hubbard 
William  Hamblcton 
Ifaac  Hill,  jun. 
James  Hooker 
Hczck.  Hooker,  jun. 
William  Hooker 
Hugh  Hanna 
Ahira   Hill- 
1 

REv.  David  Jewit 
Rev  David  Judfon 
Jacobjohnfon,  A.M. 
James  Ingalls 
William  Johnfon 
Jofeph  Jacobs,  jun. 
Nathaniel  Jewit 
James  Jud 
Abel  Judfon 
Ebenezer  Junes 
Calebjohnfjn. 
K 

Jonathan  Kelfey 
Robert  Ktjnnedy 


Dennifon  Kingiberry 
Jonathan  Kingfbcrry 
Thomas  Kenny 
Azariah  Kenny 
Timothy  Kimball 
Jofiah  Kingfley 
James  KafTon 
Samuel  Knowles 
£ldad  King 
John  Kafen 
Benjamin  Kellogg 
Samuel  Kellogg; 

5J  On.SamuclLynde 
*^  Efq; 

Rev.  Henry  Lord 
Rev.  Jonathan  Lee 
Rev.  Mark  Leaven- 
worth 
Sam .  Lock  wood  A.  M* 
James  Lockwood 
Jofeph  Lee 
Jofeph  Lee,  jun, 
Simeon  Lyman 
John  Landon 
Ebenezer  Leach 
Nathaniel  Loomis 
Jacob  Lyman 
David  Lynian 
Ifaac  Lawrence 
Jofeph  Lcckwood 
Peter  Lockwood 
Nehemiah  Lewi* 
Hezekiah  Lee 
John  Led  yard 
Ebenezer  Lymaa 
Jofiah  Lyman 
Benoni  Loomis 
Jofeph  Loomis 
Benjamin  Lothrcp 
Thomas  Lyraan 
Nathaniel  Loomis 
Thom:i3  L*omis 

SaraucI 


Sui^fcrihers  Names'^ 


Samuel  Lcc 
Ifaac  Lawrence 
Be  pj  am  in  Lord, 
M 

Simeon  Minor, Efq; 
Rev.  GideonMjlls 
RevEvanderMorrifeB 
Capt  Richard  Munfoa 
Daniel  Mecks 
Samuel  More 
Joaaihan  Mearitt 
Hczekiah  May 
Samuel  Miner 
John  Meigs 
John  Meigs,  juji. 
isamuel  Marlhall 
James  Morris 
Jonathan  Munger 
Ephraim  Minor 
CUment  Minor 
Matthew  Minor 
Matthew  Mitchel 
Simon  Miichel 
Jonathan  Martin 
Sarah  Millaid 
David  Miller 
Thomas  Millard 
Jonathan  Maliby 
JcHah  Mack 
William  Morgan 
Daniel  Morgan 
Jofeph  Morgan 
Thomas  tdarilial 
Rev.  SajnucJ  Mofely 
Nathaniel  Mofely 
George  Martin 
Cieorgc  Martin,  jun. 
Ebenezef  Martin. 

N 
lOhn  Ncwcomb 
.1  Obadiah.Newcom 
Nathaniel  Newell 
.  Rutji  Newell 


Hezekiah  Newcomb 
Jfaac  Norton,  jun. 
T*mes  Norton 
J  inathar.  North 
Ebenezcr  North 
O 

CApt.  SarauelOlm- 
{tead 
J»hn  Owen 
J^feph  Otis 
William  Ofgood 
Daniel  Ofgood 
James  Occom. 
P 

SAmuelPrenliceEfq 
JofephPitkin,  Efq; 
JofephPerkin5,A.M. 
John  Porter 
Experience  Porter 
Btnjamin  Paine 
Jofepb  Prcflon 
John  Potwine 
John  Paine 
VVilliam  Peai)ody 
Samuel  Plumb 
Jonathan  Prentice 
Peter  Powers 
Thomas  Phelps 
Nathaniel  Porter 
Richard  Pcet 
Nathaniel  Porterjun* 
Ifaac  Peck 
Henry  Peck 
Mic4J^h  Pride 
David  Palmer 
Joftn  Palmer 
Rufus  Piicc 
John  Phelps 
Eztrkiel  Feirce 
James  Pinnes 
Mary  Pierce 
Capt.  Edward  Phelps 
i^\^i}  Ptiice 


Theodore  Prefton ' 
Timothy  Pearl 
Capt.  ifaac  Parilh 
Edward  Paine 
J..leph  Porter 
Abraham  Pcirfon 
Gerftiom  Palmer 
Benjamin  Pomroy 
Timothy  Porter 
William  Porter 
John  Peck 
Jacob  Prcfton 
William  Prefton.- 
R 

REv.Dav,Rowland 
Rev.NathRibertS 
Rev.  A  (her  Rofuer 
John  Robinfon 
ichabod  Robinfon 
Elifha  Rockwell 
Nathan  Randall 
Jofhua  Raymond 
Jofiah  Rofe 
Rufus  Rude 
George  Richards 
Ebenezer  Riclwdfoa 
David  Ripley 
Azariah  Rood 
Jgfeph  Richards 
Samuel  Raymond 
Jonathan  RufTell 
Samuel  Robbins 
Eliakim  Raymond 
Jofeph  Rofts 
SarauclRindle* 
S 

THomasStofrsE'*q; 
Rcv.Rich.  Salter 
BenjaminStiles  A.M. 
Jofeph  Spencer 
William  Stewardj 
James  Steward 
Pcicr  Speocer 

Jofepb 


Suhfcrihers  Names] 


Joff  pTi  SkfF 

NifhiiniC'  Shattock 
JofephSulLird 
If  -tel  Shdv 
Eliakiiii  Smith 
Dihie  S   Jyiin 
Thomas    eymour 
W  llijm  •»u<niier 
Sa  nuel  ^eei 
ACi  St/o  g 
N^rh^niel  >kfnner 
El'(h-^  Sheldi^n 
AzirS-nith 
Cap^  Jjhn  Sprague 
HuGhrns  .'^torrs 
Cape.  Samuel  Storrs 
Capr.  Jof.  Sweetland 
Recompcnce  Smith 
Joi.  Svveetland,  jun. 

Thofnas  Siiaw 

Jacob  Stebbins 

Jonathan  bmith 

John  >teel 

Samuel  Strong 

John  Sherman 

Giles  Slaughter 

Ifaac  Scudder 

Jofeph  St.  John 

Daniel  St.J  .'h« 

Samuel  Sanford 

John  Sanford 

Andrew  Sanford 

David  Sanford 

EphraimStrnng  A.M 

Jofeph  ^afford 

Solomon  S<.fford 

Ezekie)  Story 

Jofeph  Sntord 

Ephraim  Smich 

Jacob  Strong 

John  Shepard 

Zebolon  Scvmour 

bamuel  Smtdlcy 


Capr.  Elifha  Stoddard  J'if.Wilcockfon,Erq{ 


J'fiah  btrong 
Jumes  Stoddard 
David  Stowell 
Ebc  >ezer  Stowell 
David  Smith 
Ann  Seldin 
Samuel  Spencer 
Benjamin  Smallcy 
Elj^h  Sprague 
Elizabeth  Swiff. 
T 


Roger  Wolcott,  Efq; 
David  Whitney,E  q; 
ReVoSolom  Williami 
Ebenezer  Wales, Efqj 
NaihanielWales,E  ^ 
Rev.  Stephen  Whi 
Rev.  Jabez  Wrigl 
Rev.Ebcn.WheeK 
Warham  Wi'liams 
Tut.  Yale  C 
Peletiah  Webfter 


pAp 


t.  James  Tyler  Elftia  Wane.i 
~  Benoni  Wnght 

William  W.'- 
Ebenez 
John 
i 


Mofe'  Tyler 
Stephen  Tucker 
Jedidiah  Tracy 
H'^peftil  Tayler 
Nathaniel  Tracy 
Daniel  Tracey 
Joel  Thrall 
Samuel  Tracey 
EliOia  Tracey 
Philip  Turner 
Nathaniel  Tracey 
J  feph  Tracey 
EliakimTupper 
Ec*mond  Tompkins 
Nathaniel  Thornton 
Samuel  Tonfly 


*£lea%ei 
1 Nathaniel    »» 
J  feph  VVarne? 
Katharine  V\'ebf!\'r 
Ilimuef  Woodv/aid 
Ifracl  Wcodwjrd 
Preftrved  Wright 


Capt.  JofialiThatrVer  Ich*bod  Warner 


James  Tompfon 
William  Trumhall 
Jonathan  T\vi?s 
Ebentzer  Tor^.ipfon 
Ebenezer  T?ylor 
John  Twec^dy 
Tames  T'.if  .le. 

I^Apt.  jamesUdey. 

W' 
r^OlEliih.  Williams 


Benjamin  Winchoi 
Charles  WoodruJfF 
Beijimin  Wouoiiifi^ 
Elriathaf>  Wh'j(fij»fi 
Jofliua  Wniriify,jun. 
Daniel  Williams 
Samuel  Warner 
Sibylla  Whitehead,. 


Frsi^imt 


Suifcrihers  Namesl 


Province   of  N  ElV-TO  RK, 


A  F 

tJ^UIiam    Adams,  CTephen  Fofler 
*^  A.  M.  ^  G 

^f  B  Ik  f  AJ.Abra.Garner 

''^  'aac  Barnes,   Efq;   ^^  William  Glean 
Eliao  Bailey,  Efq;   Fhomzs  Golcifmith 
>  David  BoftA'ick  Daniel  Gcldfmith 
^;  Ifaac   Brown      Ja  per  Griffin, 
v*.  S?»muel  Biid  H 

;a.  Batbcr.  A,  M.  pLifhaHutchinfon, 


t.  WilliamBryant 


je)  Brown 
n  Bailey 
•ey 


Efq; 


Rob.  Hempfted,  Efq; 
Jofiah  Howell,  Efq; 
Rev.  Azar.  Horton 
Jon. Hunting,  A.  M 
William  Hedges 
Jofeph  Hicks 
Snmuel  Hazard 
'eh^       JonathanHazard,jun 

\     Nathaniel  Hazard 
Chat-i  JohnHuBting 
.eld,  Efqi    Ezekiel  Hedges 


ob.  Conk!  in 
JoiepU  ConkiinTer 
Samuel  Cux 
Thc^mas  Cooper 
John  Cook 
D^vid  Cor  with 
N<ihem)ah  Carpenter  Cap 
J>j(tph  Carpenter 
Jacob  Carle 
Ana  Carle. 
D 

Sx'Vrnuc!  L)cnton 
J   kph  Dcvis 
M»:gu;ct  Du  Bo  is 
Daniel  Di^^iton. 
E 

E 


Zckici  Everet 


Everet 


J.jhn  Hedges 
Benjamin  Hutchinfon 
Abigail  Flull 
Ojnftant  Havens 
SaTiuel  Howell 
Sari^uel  Hunting 

I.  Theo.  Howell 
Eli'fh^^  Howell 
Ifiael  Halley 
Ciipr.E'eaz.  Hawkins 
E'c-ze-.-fawkinfjjun. 
Ch:.ries  Fi.well 
Abi?>h^m  Howell 
Ezel<i<i  H«  well 
Bcrjui  in  K 'ichman 
Saii)ue  Higbci,  jun. 

1 
lOhn  Jennings 


CAmuelLondonErr; 
^   Willi.  Lawrence 
Benjamin  Lawrence 
Capt.BenjLhomedieti 
PVBLevingftonA.M 
Jam6«Lc'por. 

M 
OOn.E.  Miller  Efq 
^•*  Andrew  Miller 
Samu€l  Mulroid 
Daniel  Miller 
Thomas  Mulford 
Lemuel  Mulford 
Ifracl  More 
Thomas  More 
John  Mackie 
Capt.  —  Merfey 
Daniel  More 
John  MitcheW 
John  Marfton 
Zebuion  Mills 
Ifaac  Mills 
V/iliiam  Miller 
Hanr*ah  Menilh. 

N 
/^Ecrge  Nprton 


R 


Ey.  Ebenez.Pem- 
bertori 
R 
Ohn  Rhe 


"fobn  Evcrcc 
-;>iion  E.i 


J   The  mas  J;,  i'np 
Nathan  Jagga:. 


VyflliamJrn^idi.Efqs 
Capf.VVm.  Smith 
WilliamPcmithA.M. 
Nicholas  Smith  .   : 
Elizabtih  vStJtwcii 
Gilbcit  omifh 

Richard 


Suhfcrihers  Names] 


Richard  Smith 
Job  Smiih 
Bsnjamiu  Strong 
Selah  Strong 
Be.iajah  Strong 
Thomas  Strong^ 


T  W 

r>  Ev.Wm.Throcp  jOfeph  Wi^kam, 

Rev.  Sylvahus  While 
Ejnathan  White 
Richard  Wiggins 


Jonathan  Toniplon, 
U 


*YOfcph  Valentine. 


Benjamin  Wright 
Richard  Woodhull 
Rich.  Woodhull  jun^ 
Obadiah  Wells, 


PROVINCE    OF  NEPF'JERSEr. 


REv.Tho.Ahthur 
JohnAyrcSjEf.,; 
William  Allen 

John  Anderfon 
anet  Aikoirm 
Hannah  Anderfon 
Mofes  Ayres 
William  Axtell 
Jonathan  Arrifon 
Henry  Axtell 
Thomas  Applegate 
James  Afhton; 
William  Aline. 
B 

REv.Aa,BurrPrefi. 
of  N.JerfeyCol 
Rev,  Eliab  Byram 
Robert  Bar kley 
Henerica  Bennom 
Samuel  Brown 
Daniel  Bayles,  jun, 
Caleb  Baldwin 
Ifaac  Ba bbet 
Ebenezsr  Byram,jun. 
William  Boyd 
Samuel  Bealy 
Solomon  Brown 
Frederick  Buchelow 
John  Bu€kelow 


Samuel  Barren 
Timothy  Ball 
John  Black 
Francis  Brewfter 
Robert  Breden 
Peter  Booth 
Robert  B'air. 
C 

REv.JaraCampbell 
fames  Crumnoe 
Mary  Craig 
Thomas  Commy 
Barnabas  Curtifs 
Jonathan  Comes 
John  Carr,  jun. 
William  Collwell 
Elizabeth  Crawford 
William  Cruckaiank 
Jean  Cathcart 
John  Chambers 
William  Covenhaven 
Alexandria  Craig 
Ezra  Cary 
John  Cary 
Daniel  Cary 
Jacob  Coaaocart 
Thomas  Cock 
Samuel  Clark. 


a  a  a  a  2 


D 
O  Ev.  James  Da- 
•■■^  venport 

Nathaniel  Dotey 
Henry  Dfbroy 
Lucus  Dwedt 
William  Davifon 
WiiliamDavifon,  juji 
Samuel  Daiyhigh 
Duncan  Dove, 

E 

MAfkell  Ervin 
D^vid  Englii^ 
James  Ertglifo 
NoahEley. 
F 
TAmes  Fullertow 
•^   Jeremiah  Field 
Michael  Field 
Katharine  Frazler 
Charles  Ford 
Jonathan  Fiazee 
JVilliam  Ford 
Sarah  Francis 
Nathaniel^'Fofter. 
JchnFinley. 
G 

William  Ga.%ii 
David  (^somtt 
Bknof  Gili^gnd 


Subfcrihers  Names] 


Jofcph  Gallon 
Hendrtcjc  Cialock 
Jocham  Gulock. 
H 

JOnath.H>>lmes,Erq, 
Rev.  Andr.  Hunter 
Thomas  Hambim 
Jonas  Hoey 
Adam  H.ll 
Klofes  Hemb 
Mary  Head 
Francis  Hall 
James  Hamilton 
Simon  Horn 
William  Horn 
Hannah  Horn 
Wilham  Hugan 
John  Hendcribn 
John  Hill 
Michael  Henary 
William  Henary 
Uanicl  Henary 
John  Hoey. 
I 

SAmuel  Johnfon, 
Efq; 
Richard  Jewdl 
William  Jones 
Stephen  Jefup, 
K 

John  King 
John  Kelly 
Aiexande'  Killp^trlck 
William  \Uk 
Samuel  Ker , 
Jofe^jii  KerJ 
"Li 

REv.  Jofej-jh  Lamb 
Kev,  Tho.  Lewis 
Ephr.^ini  Li>cliheart 
P.-.i^Y  Lecort  e,M.D» 
Ka  harine  Llord 
£j^an;,JUisiiy 


James  Lvan 
Lt'Ji  Lewis 
J^mes  Lefley 
R  ger  Liiwfon 
Eliphalet  Lewis 
Mijy  Leffjrs 
Abraham  La  Rue 
Thomas  Lake 
Samuel  Lowden. 

M 
"D  ev.Charles  Mac- 
■^^  knight 

Samuel  Mac'Conkey 
Mary  Millikin 
El  zabeth  Mslhkin 
James  Moore 
Robert  Mc*Fee 
Mary  Maitifon 
Aaron  Mattifon 
J  'hn  Macferran 
J:^eter  Mac'Dowel 
David  .Mac*Cowin 
M^t'hias  Mount 
Anne  Mount 
John  Morehead 
Thomas  Merfhon 
Jofeph  Monow 
J  hn  Macombs 
Mary  Macombs 
Samuel  Macomaly 
Andrew  Mackmakin 
James  Magee 
Sarah  Macalafter 
James  Martin 

John  Mac*Gillird 
Jeorge  Mills 
Ifaac  Mill* 
Her.ja.  Mackfarling 
George  Mac*K:(kin 
Jacob  Mattifon 
Hugh  Martin 
James  Martin 


N 

WIlliamNorcrofs 
Rob  Newell 
Samuel  Ne^ifun 
Thomas  Newman. 

O 
TOhn  O  ivantl 
^   S.ephen  Ogdem 
P 

REv   John  Peirfon 
Tho.  Paget.Efq; 
J.'feph  Peck,  E^q; 
JohnPeirfonjun.M.D 
Tobias  Poiemus 
Ephraim  Phillips 
Peier  Parine 
Howell  P  .well 
Heiberi  Peck 
James  Pitney 
John  Porter. 
R 

HOn  JjhnReading 
Efgs 
Martin  Ryerfan^Elcii 
Rvjbert  Roife 
James  Rufs 
Sarah  Read 
Brice  Rihy    ' 
John  Roy 

Nath.  bw-z.  Randolph 
Matthew  Rue 
Samuel  Rolfe 
Robert  Roe] 
Abraham  Reeves 
John  R(jfbrugh 
John  Rancy 

Robert  Renolds* 
c 

RAIph  Smith,  E% 
Rev.TirrtSymmv'3 
Rev.  Eiihu  Spenccn 
Michael  Sweetm>A 
Derick  Sutvan  { 

Jacob  Sutphen   John 


Suhfcribers  Names, 


John  Stockton 
John  Sodon 
Dtrick  vSutvan 
Alburt  Shank 
William  Suobey 
Luke  Scank 
Heni)  S  oan 
Jjmes  S  out 
Henr>'  Scaly. 


T  Koarl  Van  Toorhaag 

Wm  Tenncnt  Henrick  Voorhaa 


J  ihn  Tomfon 
Ruih  Toweftiend 
Aartm  Tomfon 
J(>fHh  Throope. 
U 

THomas  Vandike 
Art  Vankirk 


Thomas  Urmftone 
Tobiaj  Van-Norden. 
W 

REv  EleazerWalcs 
J.Wetherill,Ef<|| 
Agnis  Watfon 
James  Wales. 


P  ENNS2^L  J^ANIA. 


A 

VVTHliam  Adams 

'^  Arch.  Anderfon 
Thomas  Armitrong 
Davjd  Allen. 

B 
fl  E\'.  Char,  Beatty 
*-^Rev.  SamuelBlair 
Rev.  John  Blair 
Thomas  Brown 
Hugh  Bartley 
J^  hn  Howrlen 
Stephen  Bower 
Ifaac  Billien 
Nathaniel  Britten 
Robert  Bredcn 
George  Bradley 
John  Blakly 
Edmond  Beach 
William  Biddle 
£.  Boudinot 
Thomas  Bourne 
Jofeph  Biddome 
Andrew  Blackburn 
Jofeph  Browne 
John  Bi^y^o 

C 

WM.  Crajg,  Efq; 
Tho.CraigEfq; 
.Rev.  Alex. Gumming 
Al«;ga»der  Colbieth 


Matthew  (  larkfon 
Th<.mas  Clark 
John  Carfen 
J^mes  Craig 
Kitharme  Culley 
David  Chambers 
Jacob  Cooper 
Samuel  Cheefeman 
John  Campbel 
Mary  Campbel 
William  Clingan 
George  Clingan 
Mofes  Crawford 
Jimes  Cumings 
James  Craven 
Daniel  Craig 
John  Crawford, 
D 

Robert  Downgy 
Thomas  Davis 
Tr  ftram  Davis 
John  Davis 
Jonathan  Drewrel 
Mary  Dobin. 
E 

DAvid  Edmifton 
John  Edward 
Robert  Eaftburn 
William  Edmifton, 
F 
Ev,  Sam.  Finley 
Magnui  Falconaf 


John  Finley 
Hugh  Fargufon 
John  Fullerlawn 
Thomas  Francis 
John  Fifher 
Robert  Finley 
ManafTeh  Finley 
William  Falconer 
John  Freenjan 
Jofeph  Fox 
Samuel  Fifher 
John  Frazier. 
G 

C^Apt.  Wm.  Grant 
^  John  Grey 
Hugh  Gunning. 
H 

A  Lex.  Hunta-jEfq; 
CaptJam.Hufton 
Samusl  Hazard 
Jofeph  Hair 
Benjamin  Hair 
Hugh  Hamiltoi* 
Robert  Henry 
Alexander  Hannah 
William  Hodge 
Andrew  Hodgc^ 
Hugh  Hodge 
Ka<hrine  Harrifon 

Jofeph  Hall 

Mary 


^uhjcrthers  Names 


c 


Abel  Marple  S 

John  Mac'Coombs     CAm.  Smith,  E!ij; 
Alexander  Magec       *^  Samuel  Sniiih 
Hugh  Mc'CuHough   William  ^.hippen 
James  Mc'Cullough  Jofeph  Sh.ppen 
Anthony  Morris         John  bmith 
John  Mc'Nair  James  Simpson 

Apt.Rob  Jamifon  jaSmes  Martin  Abraham  Scott 

Samuel  Johnfcn  ThomasMc'Cracke«  benjamin  Snodgrafs 


Mary  Heron 
Pcnn  Hoale 
James  Horner 
Thomas  Hutchinfon 
Thomas  Herrcn 
William  Hellet 
I 


Henry  Jamifon 
Henry  Jotenfton. 
K 

THoraas  Kid 
MzYy  K«i)g 
Henry  Kelfey 
Jams?  Kt^lly 
Jci.Tj  Kukpatrick 
Jdmes  Ker 
jofeph  Ktr, 


Alexander  Miller       Thomas  Smiil^ 

Jahn  Miller  Robert  Stewart 

Tho.  Mountgomery  Anthony  Scout 


James  Mc'Kee 
Alex.  Mc\  hntock 
John  Mufhet 
lohn  Mackmath. 

N 
gAmuel  Ncilfon 
James  Neilfon 
Thomas  Ncfmith. 

O 


REvDanLawrencc 
^Fhr.t^zs  Logan   O  Annah  Owen 


Thom 
Thomas  Lewis 
Francis  Lmfii 
Archibald  Leard 
Robert  Lyle 
Quarks  Lyons 
Jofeph  Leech. 
M 


npHomas  Poe 
•''•     John  Poak 
John  Potter 
James  Pethorea 
Jeremiah  Peck 


CApt.  Nath  Mageeisarah  Prichard 
Alexander  Moore  Jol^n  Pcet. 
John  Mc'Ferren 
Robert  Mc'Cracken 
John  Mc'Cullock 
John  Mitchell 
Kabel  Mc'Donnel 
MaiihewMc'Min 
Thomas  Miller 


John  Man 
jfolhua  Maddox 
John  Mc'Call 
Sarah    Moore 
C9llcn  Mac'Sy/e?iy 


R 

JjEv.  John  Roan 

William  Rankin 
Francis  Richley 
Evan  Rawland 
John  Riddle 
Thomas  Ruddy 


Adnari  Scout 
George  Sp^iFoi« 
Mary  Stevens 
Thwnas  Sloan, 

T 
TJEv.Gilb.Tennent 
•^^  Rev.  Rich.  Treat 
Mofes  1  hompfon 
Tunis  7'itui) 
Joftiua  Thomas 
Hugh  ToDenccp 

U 

HEnry  Vernor 
Henry  VanDyke 
Ifaiah  Vi^nfandt. 
W 

CApt.Rich.Walker 
Cornel.  Wynkoop 
Nicholas  Wynkoop 
John  VVi{2ton 
fames  Wyer 
VVilliam  Walker 
Robert  Wyer 
Mofcs  White 
Hugh  Wilfon 
John  Walker 


Elizabeth  Roberdeau  Edward  Warner 


S.  Robertfon 
James  Ralfion 
William  R^fh 
Sarah  Reynolds. 


Rachal  Wallace 
l^honus  VVelfti* 
Y 

Wmim  Yong. 


Suhjcrthers  Namesl 

Provim  of  NEW-  HAMPS  HIRE. 

A  Capt.  Daniel  Oilman  ThOmas  Patch 

JOfeph  Adams.        Jofiah  Oilman  M.  D.  William  Pottle 
John   Oilman  John  Purmet 

3  Samuel  Gbodhue        J  fiah  Pyper 

EZra  Barker  Griffis.  James  Pike. 

Ebenezer  Barker  I  R 

Mofes  Boynton  n  Enjamin  JewLt,      J(Ev.  Dan.  Rogers* 

Samuel  Brown  *^ 

Jofiah  Brown  L  S 

Benj.  Blanchardjun.  TkJOfes  Leavitt,       OEnry  Sherburne, 
Joftiu  a  Boynton.  ^-^  Efq,  *- *  jun, 

C  Mar.  Livermore,E{q;  Job  Strong,  B,  A . 

REv.  WardCotton  Jonathan  Low.  Theophilus  Smith 

VVm.  Cummings  M  Elias  Smith 

Jj'mesCate  DEv.  David  Mc'      Jacob  Smith. 

Nathaniel  Clement  Gregore  for  him-  T 

Jofiah  Conant.  fel^  &  30  ar  hisParifli  DEnjamin  Thing 

D  Wir.iamMoore  *^  Jonathan  Tayloi 

ZEdckiah  Drury.    Daniel  Mafun  Ed  ward  Taylor. 

John  Mead.  W 

E  N  pO).  And.  Wiggins 

jy  Ev.  Dan.  Emer-  TPfJomas  Neivins     V-/  Simon  VViggins 
*^  fon  -^    JoIhuaNeal.        Thomas  Wiggins 

John  Eliot.  P  Anvh.  Wiggins,  jun, 

G  gCOim  Phillips,  A.M.  Frap.cis  Woreeftsr. 

P  Eter  GilmanjErqjy  Cap.t.  Peter  Powers 
*•  Col,  Sam.  Giiman 

Cabny  of  R  H  0  D  E- 1  S  L  A  N  D. 

A  Narhaniel  Coggefhall       ^        G 

/^Cl.  Jeb  Almy.       Tnomas  Coggeihall  T^  Bbenezer  Grey 

,  Martha  Church  ••-'Nath.  GreenhilK 

6  Hrary  Co^zdhill  H 

LJErmione  Baniiler  James  Caheon.  Xy/M.  Hall,  Efq; 

*-■■'  JofephBaylcy  D  ^^    Jof.  Howland. 

Conitant  ijayley  "pv  Anici  Djnbam  K 

Timothy  Balch  -L^  Jacob  Dehane.  p  Benezer  Knight, 

Alexander  Bradford.  F  ^ 

C  -C^BenczerFlfher  M 

J^Ev.  Ofh  Campbell  ^  Peter  Fraiikim.  r"^Avid  Moore 

Tkumas  LratideJi  A-*'  John  Morris.     P 


Suhfcrihers  Namis» 


p  s  w 

BEnjamin  Peabodic  Vj  Afh.  Sear]es,Erq;  TOfeph  Wood.E^q; 
Simeon  Price.       -^-^  John  Sawyer.       J  Rcnjamin  Wyai 
R  T  John  WiiKon 

William  Rich-       OEnry  Tifdale         Bei  j  ^min  V\  illfon 
mond 5  Efqj  "^  Jame^  Tanner.     Abigail  V\  anton, 
Ichabod  Richmond  U  Y 

Samuel  Rhodes  -n  E v.  William Vinal,  CAmuclYeats. 

Jeremiah  Rofs,  ''^  ^ 


The  Names  of  the  following  Suhfcrihers^  not  hing  received  tn  Sea  forty 
we  have  tho't  it  proper  to  injert  them  he-e. 


D 


Avid  Burt  ThomasHibbertB.A. 

Dr.JonathanBlifsDr.  Charles  Pyrcb  n 


Nathaniel  Burt 
Alexander  Bolckum 
Simon  Colton 
Obadiah  Caipenter 
William  Carpenter 
Thomas  Cooper 
Nathaniel  Ely 
Ajiios  Dennifoa 


Rtv.  John  Sergeaiit 
Capt.  Beij.  Savage 

So.  Carolina. 
William  Stcbb  ns 
Robert  Sanccilun 
Henr)  Sweet 
John  Sweet 


Thomas  Sweet 
^'ofes  Stetb'r  s 
Rev,  PeferTh^cher 
Rev.  Benj.  Tappen 
John  7  \ 'er 
Henry  Tolman 
Rev.Steph.  Williams 
Rfchard  Woolworih 
Jofiah  Wclman. 


The  Names  of  many  others  who  have  fubfcribV,  are  not  yet 
C:}me  to  Hand.  And  in  the  ioregoing  Lilrs,  where  any  (jen- 
tiemcn  are  mention'd  witnout  their  proper  Addition  or  Title, 
or  out  of  their  proper  Place,  th*"  Publifher  rely's  on  their 
Candour  to  excufe  it. 


^1SII?I^^PI^I§lll^i1?lSII??l?^?S?iSIS 


An  Account 

Of    the   Life   of 
The  Reverend 

Mr-  David  Brainerd. 

Part     I. 

From  his  Birth,  to  the  'Time,  when  he  hegan 
to  devote  hi^nfelf  to  the  Study  of  Divi- 
nity, ill  order  to  his  being  fitted  for  theL 
Work  oj  the  Miniftry* 


M 


[  yk  TBF  R.  David  Brairurd  was  horn  Jpril  10.  lyi?. 
at  Haddam,  a  Town  belonging  to  the  Count/ 
of  Hartford^  in  the  Colony  of  Conne^icut^ 
New-England.  His  i^a/A^r,  who  died  wl^en 
this  his  Son  was  about  nine  Years  of  Age,  was 
the  Worfhipful  Hezekiah  Brainerd  Efq;  an  Affiftant,  or  one 
of  his  Majdty's  Council  for  that  CoJony,  and  the  Son  oi  Daniel 
Brainerd  Efq;  ajufticc  of  the  Peace,  and  a  Deacon  of  theChur ch 
of  Chrift  in  Haddam.  His  Mother  was  Mrs.  Dorothy  Hobart^ 
Daughter  to  the  Rev.  Mr.  Jeremiah  Hobart,  who  prcachM  a 
vhile  at  Topifieldy  and  then  removed  to  Hempftead  on  Long-' 
Jfond^  and  afterwards  removed  from  Hempjiead  (  by  Reafon  of 
Numbers  turning  QuaK?is,and  many  Qlhws  being  fg  Irreligious, 


2  ne   LIFE 

that  they  would  (3o  nothing  towards  the  Support  of  theMlniftryJf 
and  came  and  fettled  in  the  Work  of  the  Miniftry  at  Haddam  : 
Where  he  died  in  the  85th  Year  of  his  Age  :  Of  whom  it  is 
remarkablcjthathewent  to  the  publickWorfhipin  theForenoon, 
and  died  in  his  Chair  between  Meetings.  And  this  Rev.  Gen- 
tleman was  Son  of  ihe  Rev.  Mr.  Pater  Hohart^  who  was,  firft, 
Minifter  of  the  Gofpel  at  Hinghaniy  in  the  County  of  Norfolk  in 
England^  and  by  Reafon  of  the  Perfecution  of  the  Puritans,  re- 
moved with  his  Family  to  New-England^  and  was  fettled  in  the 
Miniftry  at  Hin^ham^  in  the  MaJfachufetU,  He  had  five  Sons, 
viz.  Jc/hua,  Jeremiah^  Gerjham^  japheth,  and  Nehemiah,  His 
Son  Jofljua  v/as  Minifter  at  S outho Id o:\Lofig- Ifland  ;  -—'Jeremiah 
Wis  M.T,  David  Brainerd*s  GrsLndfzther,  Minifter  at  Haddam^ 
Sec.  as  was  before  obferved  :  Gerfhom  was  Minifter  o^Groton  in 
ConneSfirut  :  Japheih  was  a  Phyfician,  and  went  in  the  Quality 
of  a  Do£lor  of  a  Ship,  to  England^  {  before  theTime  for  the  tak- 
ing his  fecond Degree  a^College  )  and  defigned  to  go  from  thence 
to  the  Ea/i-lndies,  and  never  was  heard  of  more  :  Nehemiah'W2s 
fometime  Fellow  of //<7ri;<2r^  College,  and  afterwards  Minifler 
at  Newton  in  the  MaJJachufetis.  The  Mother  of  Mrs.  Dorothy 
Hohart  (  who  was  afterwards  U^ainerd )  was  Daughter  to  the 
Rev.  Mr.  Samuel  IVhiting,  Minifler  of  the  Gofpel,  firftat  Bofton 
in  Lincoln(Inre\^^^  afterwards  2.t  Lynn  in  the  MaJJachujetti^Nevo* 
England :  He  had  three  Sons  that  were  Minifters  of  the  Gofpe/- 

Mr.  David  Brainerd  vfz.^  the  third  Son  of  his  Parents.  They 
had  five  Sons  and  four  Daughters  :  Their  eldeft  Son  is  Hezekiah 
Brainerd  Efq;  a  Jufllce  of  the  Peace,  and  for  feveral  Years  pafl 
a  Reprcfentative  of  theTown  of  Haddam,  in  the  GeneralAflem- 
h\y  oiCoine£iicutCQ\ony  :  Thefecond  was  theRev.Mr.A^^^^w/^^ 
Brainerdt  a  worthy  Minifter  at  Ea/ibury  in  Conne^icut,  who 
.died  of  a  Confumption  Nov.  10.  1742.  The  fourth  is  Mr- 
John  Brninerd,  who  fuccecds  his  Bvoihzv  David,  as  Miilionary 
to  the  Indians,  and  Paftor  of  the  fame  Church  of  Chriftian  /«- 
dians  m  New-Jerfey  :  And  the  fifth  was  Ijrael,  lately  Student 
at  2^/^-College  in  New- Haven,  and  died  fmce  his  Brother 
David,—  Mrs.  Dorothy  Brainerd  having  lived  feveral  Years  a 
"Widow,  died,  when  her  Son,  vvhofe  Life  I  am  about  to  give  an 
Account  of,  was  about  fourteen  Years  of  Age  :  So  that  in  his 
Youth  he  was  left  both  Fatherlefs  and  Motherlefs.— What  Ac- 
count he  has  given  of  Himfdf,  Juid  his  own  Life,  may  be  feea  in 
what  follows,  j 

I 


A./Ei.i-'iS'  of  iWir.DavidBralnerd.  A  D  i732-i;33'  3 

I  Was,  I  think,  from  my  Youth,  fomething  fober,  and  inclined 
rather  to  Melancholy,  than  the  contraryExtreme  ;  bat  don't 
remember  any  Thing  of  Convi6tion  of  Sin,  worthy  o^Rsmdrk, 
"till  1  was,  I  believe,  about  feven  or  eight  Years  of  Age  ;   when  I 
became  fomething  concern'd   for  my  Soul,  and  terrified  at  ths 
Thoughts  of  Death,  and  was  driven  to  the  Performance  of  Du- 
ties :  But  it  appeared  a  melancholy  Bulinefs,   and  del^roycd  my 
Eagernefs  for  Play,     ^d  alas  !  This  religiousConcern  was  but 
fliort-lived.     However,  I  fometimes  attended  fecretPrayer  ;  and 
thus  lived  at  Ea[e  in  X'lon^  without  God  in  the  World,  and  with- 
out much  Concern,  as  Ireinembcr,  'till  I    was   above  thirteea 
Years  of  Age.     But  fometime  in  the  Winter  1732,  I  wasfome-" 
thing  roufed  out  of  carnal  Security,  by  Ifcarce  knew  whatMeans 
at/y//  ;  but  was  much  excited   by   the   prevailing  of  a  rnortal 
Sicknefs  in  Haddatn  :  I  was  frequent,  conftant  and  foirjething 
fervent  in  Duties,   and  took  Delight  in  reading,  efpecially  Mr. 
'Janeway'i  Token  for  Children  ;  I  felt  fometimes  much  melted  in 
Duties,  and  took  great  Delight  in  thePerformance  of  'em  :  And 
1  fometimes  hoped,  that  I  was  converted,  or  atleaft  in  a  good  and 
hopeful  Way  for  Heaven  and   Happinefs,    not  knowing  what 
Converfion  was.     The  Spirit  of  God  at  this  Time  proceeded 
far  with  me  ;  I  was   remarkably  dead  to  the  World,  and  my 
Thoughts  were  almoft  wholly  employed  about   my  Soul's  Con- 
cerns ;  and  [may   indeed  fay,  almofi  1  zvas -perfwaded  to  be  a 
Cnrijlian,     I  was  aifo  exceedingly  diftrefled   and   melancholy  at 
the  Death  of  my  Mother,   in  March  1732.    But  afterwards  fny 
religious  Concern  began  to  decline,  and  1  by  Degrees   fell  back 
into  a  confiderab'e  Degree  of  Security;    tho'    I  fiill   attended 
fecret  Prayer  frequently. 

About  the  15th  of  April  1733,  I  removed  from  my  Father's 
Houfe  to  Eaji-Haddam,  where  1  fpent  four  Years,  but  ftiil 
without  God  in  theWorld  ;  tho'  for  the  moft  Parti  went  a  Round 
of  fecret  Duty,  I  was  not  exceedingly  addidted  to^oung  Com- 
pany, or  Frolicking  (as  it  is  called)  But  this  I  know,  that  when 
I  did  go  into  Company,  I  never  returned  from  a  P'roiick  in  my 
Life,  with  fo  good  a  Confcience  as  I  went  with  ;  It  always  add- 
ed new  Guilt  to  me,  and  made  m.e  afraid  to  come  to  the  Throne 
of  Grace,  and  fpoiled  thofe  good  Frames,  I  was  wont  fome- 
times to  pleafe  my  felf  with.  But  alas  !  all  my  good  Frame* 
•were  but  Self-Righteoufnefs^  not  bottomed  on  a  Defire  for  the 
Glory  of  God, 

B  3  Abcut 


5    ^/.  I9--2I.      5^/&^  LIFE       A.D.i737y  1738: 

About  the  latter  End  of  April  1737,  being  full  19  Years  of 
Age,  I  removed  to  Durham^  and  began  to  work  on  my  Farm, 
and  (o  continued  the  Year  out,  or  near,  'till  I  was  20  Years 
r>ld  ;  frequently  longing,  from  a  natural  Inclination,  after  2 
liberal  Education.  When  1  was  about  twenty  Years  of  Age,  I 
lipplied  my  felf  to  Study  ;  and  fometime  before,  was  more  than* 
%  rdinarily  excited  to  and  in  Duty  :  But  now  engaged  more  than 
ever  in  the  Duties  of  Religior .  1  became  very  ftrift,  and  watch- 
ful over  my  Thoughts,  Words,  and  Anions  ;  and  thought  I 
iiiufl  be  fober  indeed,  becaufe  I  dtfigned  to  devore  my  felf  to  the 
Ivliniftry  ;  and  imagined  I  did  dcditate  my  felf  to  the  Lord. 

Some  Time  in  ^pril  1738,   I  went  to  Mr.  Fijke's^  and  lived 
with  him,  during  his  Life.  *    And  I  remember.  He  adviled  me 
wholly  to  abandon  young  Company,   and  afibciate  m}felf  with 
grave  elderly  People  :  which  Coanfel  I  followed  ;  and  my  Man- 
lier of  Life  was  now  exceeding  regular,   and    full   of  Religion, 
iuch  as  it  was  :  For  1  read  my  Bible  more  than  twice  through 
in  lefs  than  a  Year,  I  fpent  much  Time  every  Day  in  fecret  Pray- 
er, and  other  fecret  Duties  j  I  gave  greatAttention  to  the  Word 
preached,  and  endeavoured  to  my  uimoft  to  retain  it :  So  much 
concerned  was  I  about  R-eligion,  that  I  agreed  v/ith  fome  young 
Perfons  to  meet  i^x\v?iiQ.\y  gu  Sabbath- Evening s  tot  xtWgious   Ex- 
crcife?,  and  thought  my  felf  fmcere  in   thefc  Duties  ;  and  after 
our  Meeting  w^s  ended,  I  ufed  to  repeat  the  Difcourfes  of  •the 
Day  to  my  felf,  and  recollect  what  I  could,  tho'    fometimes  it 
was  verv  late  in  the  Night.     Again,  ov\Mond<.y-Mcrnii7gs^  1  ufed 
fometimes  to  recollecSt  the  fam6  Sermons.    And  I  hafi  fon.rtimes 
confiderable  Movings  of  AfFe6iions  ifiDuties,and  mucbPleaiii-e, 
and  had  many  Thoughts  of  joining  to  the  Church.     Li  f?!-..  t,  I 
had  a  very  good  outfide,  and  refted  entirely  on  my  Duties,   tho* 
1  was  not  fenlible  of  it. 

After  Mr.  Fijke*'^  Death,  I  proceeded  in  my  Learning  with 
my  Brother  ;  and  was  fiill  very  conftant  in  religious  Duties, and 
oJien  wondered  at  the  Levity  of  Profefi'ors  ;  *iwas  a  Trouble  to 
me,  (hat  they  were  fo  carelefs  in  religious  Matters.---  Thus  I 
proceeded  a  coniidciab'e  Length  on  z  felf-righteous  Foundation  ; 
and  fliould  have  been  entirely  loft  and  undone, had  not  the  mccr 
Mercy  ot  God  prevented. 


Mr.  I-ifie  was  the  Paftor  of  the  Church  in  Haddam. 

•Some 


^/.  2  f .       of  Mr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1738.     5 

Some  Time  in  the  Beginninc:  of  Winter, ^/2W5  I738,itpleared 
God,    on  one  Sabbath-day  Morning,    as  I  was  walking  out 
for  fome  fecret  Duties  (  as  I  remember  )  to  give  me  on  a  Suddca 
fuch  a  Senfe  of  my  Danger  and  the  Wrath  of  God,  that  I  ftood 
amazed,  and  my  former  good   Frames,  that  1  had  pleafed  myfelf 
with,  all  prefently  vanifhed  ;  and  from  the  View,   that  I  had  of 
my  Sin  and  Vilenefs,  I  was  much  diftrefTed  all  that  Day,   fear- 
ing the  Vengeance  of  God  would  foon  overtake  me  ;  I  was  much 
dejeded,  and  kept  much  alone,  and  fometimes  begrutched  the 
Birds  and  Beafts  their  Happinefs,  becaufe  they  were  not  expofed 
to  eternal  Mifery,  as  I  evidently  faw  I  was.     And  thus  I  lived 
from  Day  to  Day, being  frequently  in  greatDiftrefs :   Sometimes 
there  appeared  Mountains  before  me  to  obftrudt  my  Hopes  of 
Mercy  ;   and  the   Work   of  Converfion   appeared  fo  great,  I 
thought  I  fhould  never  be  the  Subje(5t  of  it :  But  ufed,  however, 
to  pray  and  cry  to  God,  and  perform  other  Duties   with  great 
Earneftnefs,  and  hoped  by  fome  Means  to  make  theCafe  better. 
And  tho'  I  Hundreds  of  Times  renounced  all  Pretences  of  any 
Worth  in  my  Duties  (  as  I  thought )  even  in  the  Seafon  of  the 
Ferformance  of  them,  and  often  confefTed  to  God  that  I  deferv- 
ed  nothing  for  the  very  beft  of  them, but  eternal  Condemnation  : 
Yet  ftill  1  had  a  fecret  latent  Hope  of  recommending  my    felf  to 
God  by  my  religious  Duties  ;  and  when  I  prayed  afFedionately, 
and  my  Heart  feemed  in  fome  Meafure  to  melt,  I  hoped  God 
would  be  thereby  moved  to  pity  me, my  Prayers  then  look'd  with 
fome  Appearance  oiGoodnefs  in  *em,&  I  feemed  to  mournioT'^m  I 
and  then  I  could  in  fome  Meafure  venture  on  the  Mercy  of  God 
in  Chriit  (  as  I  tho't;  )  Tho'  the  preponderatiog  Thought  and 
Foundation  of  my  Hope  was  fome  Imagination  of  Goodnejs  in 
my  Heart  Meltings,   and  Flowing  of  Affections  in  Duty,  and 
(  fometimes)  extraordinary  Enlargements  therein,  k^c.  Tho*  at 
fome  Times  the  Gate  appeared  fo  very  firait^  that  it  look'd  next 
to  impoffibleto  enter ^  yet  at  other  Times  1  flittered  my  felf  that 
it  was  not  fo  very  difficult,  and  hoped  I  (huuld  by  Diligence  and 
Watchfulnefs  foon  gain  the  Point.     Sometimes  after  Enlarge- 
ment in  Duty  and.confiderable  AfFe6tion,   I  hoped  I  had  made  a 
good  Step  towards  Heaven,  and  imagined  that  God  was  afFe£led 
as  I  was,    and  that  he  would  hear  fuch  fmcere  Cries  (  as  I  called 
them)  and   fo.  fometimes  when  I  withdrew  for  fecret  Duties  in 
greatDiftrefs,!  returned  fomething  comfortable  i  and  thusheal'd 
niy  fcif  with  my  Duties. 


6        ^t.  22.  r&5  LIFE  A.  D.  1739? 

Some  Time  in  February  1738,9.  I  fet  apart  a  Day  for  fecret 
Fafting  and  Prayer,  and  fpent  the  Day  in  almoft  incefiant  Cries 
to  God  for  Mercy,  that  he  would  open  my  Eyes  to  fee  the  Evil 
of  Sin,  and  the  Way  of  Life  by  Jefus  Chrift.  And  God  was 
pleafed  that  Day  to  make  confiderable  Difcoveries  of  my  Heart 
tome  :  But.ftill  1 /rw/?^^  in  ail  the  Duties  I  performed;  tho' 
there  wa's  no  Manner  of  Goodnefs  in  theDuties  I  then  performed, 
there  being  no  Manner  of  Refpedt  to  theGlory  of  God  in  them, 
nor  any  fuch  Principle  in  my  Heart  :  yet  God  was  pleafed  to 
make  my  Endeavours  that  Y^^'y  a  Means  to  {hew  me  my  Help- 
lefsnefs  in  fome  Meafurc. 

Sometimes  I  was  greatly  encouraged^  and  imagined  that  God 
loved  me  and  was  pleafed  with  me,   and  thought  I  fhould  foon 
be  fully  reconciled  to  God  ;  while  the  Whole  was  founded  on 
meer  Prefumption,  aiifing  from  Enlargement  in  Duty,  or  Flow- 
ing of  Affe6lions,  or  fome  good  Refolutions,  and  the  like.    And 
when,  at  Times,  great  Dlftrefs  began  to  arife,  on  a  Sight  of  my 
Vilenefs  and  Nakednefs,  and  Inability  to  deliver  my  felf  from  a 
fovereign  God,  I  ufsd  to  put  oft  the  Difcovery,  as  what  I  couid 
not  bear.     Once,  I  rcmsmber,  a  terrible  Pang  of  Diftrefs  feized 
me,  and  ihe  Thoughts  of  renouncing   my  Self,    and  (landing 
naked  before  God,  ftripped  of  all  Goodnefs,   were  fa  dreadful 
to  me,  that  I  was   ready  to  fay  to  'em  as  Felix  to  Paul^    Go  thy 
JVay  for  this  Tims.     Thus,  tho'  I  daily  longM  for  greater  Con- 
viction of  Sin,  fuppofing  that  I  muft  fee  more  of  my  dreai^ful 
State  in  order  to  a  Remedy,  yet  when  the  Difcoveries  of  my 
vile  hellifli  Heart  were  made  to  me,  the  Sight  was  fo  dreadful, 
and  fliewed  me  {o  plainly  my  Expofednefs  to  Damnation,  that 
I  could   not  endure  it.—-   I  condantly  ftrove    after    whatever 
^ialifications^  1  imagined-others  obtained  before  the  Reception 
of  Chrilt,  in  order  to  recommend  me  to  his  Favour.     Sometimes 
I   felt  the  Power  of  an  hard  Heart,  and  fuppofed  it  miiit  be 
fo(ten'd  before  Chrift   would  accept   of  me  ;   and    when  I   felt 
any   Meltings  of  Heart,  I  hoped    now  the   Work  was   almofl 
done :  And   hence,    when    my  Diftrefs  ftill  remain'd,  I    was 
wont  to  murmur  at  God's  Dealings  with  me  ;  and   thought, 
when   others    felt  their  Hearts  foftened,   God   fliewed    them 
Mercy  :    But  my  Dilkefs  remained  ftill. 

Sometimes  1  grew  re?mfs  zndjlu^gi/h,  without  any  great  Con- 
victions of  Sin,  for  a  confiderable  Time  together  j  buX  after 
fuch  a  Seafon,  ConviSiions  fometimes  feized  me  more  violently. 
One  Night  I  remember  in  particular,  when  I  was  walking 
^litarily  Abroad,  I  had  opsn'd  [o  ms  Tuch  aViev7  of  iJiy  Sin;that 


JSl.22i         ^/ Ma  David  Brainerd.     A.D.1739;    7 

I  feared  the  Ground  would  cleave  afunder  under  my  Feet,  and 
become  my  Grave,  and  fend  my  Soul  quick  into  Hell,  before 
I  could  get  Home.  And  tho'  I  was  forced  to  go  to  Bed,  left 
my  Diltrefs  fhould  be  difcovcred  by  others,  which  I  much 
feared  5  yet  I  fcarce  durft  Sleep  at  all,  for  1  thought  it  would  be 
a  great  Wonder  if  I  fhould  be  out  of  Hell  in  the  Morning. 
And  tho*  my  Diftrefs  was  fometimes  thus  great,  yet  I  greatly 
dreaded  the  lofs  of  Convidions,  and  returning  back  to  a  State 
of  carnal  Security,  and  to  my  former  Infenfibility  of  impending 
Wrath  ;  which  mad€  me  exceeding  exa6t  in  my  Behaviour, 
left  I  fhould  flifle  the  Motions  of  God's  Spirit.  When  at  any 
Time  I  took  a  View  of  my  ConvitSlions  of  my  own  Sinfulnefs, 
and  thought  the  Degree  of  *em  to  be  confiderable,  I  was  wont 
to  trufl  in  my  Convidions  :  Bat  this  Confidence,  and  the  Hopes 
that  arofe  in  me  from  it,  of  foon  making  fome  notable  Ad- 
vances towards  Deliverance,  would  eaCe  my  Mind,  and  I  foon 
became  more  fenfelefs  and  remifs  :  But  then  again,  when  £ 
difcerned  my  Cor,vi(Slions  to  grow  languid,  and  I  tho't  them 
about  to  leave  me,  this  immediately  alarmed  and  diftrefled  me» 
Sometimes  I  expedled  to  take  a  large  Step,  and  get  very  far  to- 
wards Converfionj,  by  fome  particular  Opportunity  or  Means 
I  had  in  View. 

The  many  Difappointments,  and  great  DiftrelTes  and  Per- 
plexity I  met  with,  put  me  into  a  mqft  horrible  Frame  of  con^ 
iejling  with  the  Almighty;  with  an  inward  Vehemence 
and  Virulence,  finding  Fault  v/ith  his  Ways  of  Dealing  with 
Mankind.  I  found  great  Fault  with  the  Imputation  of  Adarri^ 
Sin  to  his  Pofterity  :  And  my  wicked  Heart  often  wifhed  for 
fome  other  Way  of  Salvation,  than  by  Jefus  Chrid  :  And  being 
itke  the  troubled  Sea^  and  my  Thoughts  confufed,  1  ufsd  to  con- 
trive to  efcape  the  Wrath  of  God  by  fome  other  Means,  and 
had  flrange  Projedllons,  full  of  Atheifm,  contriving  to  difappoint 
God's  Defigns  and  Decrees  concerning  me,  or  to  efcape  God's 
Notice,  and  hide  myfeif  from  him  :  But  when,  upon  Reflec- 
tion, I  faw  thefe  Projedlions  were  vain,  and  would  not  fervc 
me,  and  that  I  could  contrive  nothing  for  my  own  Relief,  this 
would  throw  my  Mind  into  the  mofi  horrid  Frame,  to  wifli 
there  was  no  God,  or  to  wifh  there  were  fome  other  God  that 
could  controul  him,  ^c.  Thefe  Thoughts  and  Defires  were 
the  fecret  Inclinations  of  my  Heait,  that  were  frequently 
2i€i'mg  before  1  was  aware ',  but  alas,  they  were  mine!  Altho* 
I  was  affrighted  with  t!^m,  when- [came  to  refled  on  thera  : 
When  I  confidered  of  it,  it  diftreiied  me,  to  t-hink,  that  my 

Heart 


8      ^t.  22.  1U  LIFE  A.a  1739: 

Heart  was  io  full  of  Enmity  afainft  God ;  and  it  made  me 
tremble,  left  God's  Vengeance  (hculd  fuddenly  fall  upon  me, 
I  ufed  before,  to  imagine  my  Heart  was  not  {o  bad,  as  the 
Scriptures  and  fome  other  Books  reprefcnted.  Sometimes  I 
ufed  to  take  much  Pains  to  work  it  up  into  a  good  Frame, 
a  humble  fubmiffive  Difpofition  \  and  hoped  there  was  then 
fomeGoodnefs  in  me  :  But  it  may  be  on  a  fuddenjthe  Thoughts 
of  the  Stridlnefe  of  the  Law,  or  the  Sovereignty  of  God,  would 
fo  irritate  the  Corruption  of  my  Heart,  that  I  had  io  watched 
over,  and  hoped  I  had  brought  to  a  good  Frame,  that  it 
would  break  over  all  Bounds,  and  burft  forth  on  all  Sides, 
like  Floods  of  Waters,  when  they  break  down  their  Damm. 
JBut  being  fenfibleof  the  NecefTity  of  a^eep  Humiliation  in 
order  to  a  faving  Clofe  with  Chrift,  1  ufed  to  fet  my  felf  to  work 
in  my  own  Heart  tho(eConvi^ions,  that  were  requifite  in  fuch  an 
Humiliation  :  As,  a  Convidlion,  that  God  would  be  juft,  if  he 
caft  me  off  for  ever :  And  that  if  ever  God  fhould  beftowMer- 
cy  on  me,  it  would  be  meer  Grace,  tho'  I  fhould  be  in  Diftrefs 
many  Years  firft,.  and  be  never  fo  much  engaged  in  Duty  ;  that 
God  was  not  in  the  leaft  obliged  to  pity  me  the  more  for  all  paft 
Duties,  Cries,  and  Tears,  i^fc.  Thefe  Things  I  ftrove  to  my 
utmoft  to  bring  my  felf  to  a -firm  belief  of,  and  hearty  aflentto  ; 
and  hoped  that  now  I  was  brought  off  from  my  felf,  and  truly 
humbled  and  bowed  to  the  divine  Sovereignty  -,  and  was  wont 
to  tell  God  in  my  Prayers,  that  now  1  had  thofe  veryDifpofitiona 
ofSoulthathe  required,  and  on  which  he  fliewed  Mercy  to 
others,  and  thereuj^on  to  beg  and  plead  for  Mercy  tome:  But 
when  I  found  no  Relief,  and  was  {till  opprefled  with  Guilt  and 
Fears  of  Wrath,  my  Soul  was  in  a  Tumult,  and  my  Heart  rofe 
againft  God, as  dealing  hardly  with  me.  Yet  then  myConfciencc 
flew  in  my  Face,  putting  me  in  Mirtd  of  my  late  Confeffion  to 
'God  of  his  JulHce  in  my  Condemnation,  ^c.  And  this,  giving 
me  a  Sight  of  the  Badnefs  of  my  Heart,  threw  me  ^gain  into 
Diftrefs,  and  I  wifhed  I  had  watched  my  Heart  more  narrowly, 
to  keep  it  from  breaking  out  againftGod'sDealings  with  me, and 
I  even  wifhed  1  bad  not  pleaded  for  Mercy  on  Account  of  my 
Humiliation,  becaufe  thereby  1  had  loft  all  my  feeming  Good- 
nefs. 

Thus,  Scores  of  Times,  I  vainly  imagined  my  felf  humbled 
and  prepared  for  faving  Mercy. 

While  1  was  in  this  diftreffed,  bcwilder'd,  and  tumultuous 
State  of  Mind,  the  Corruption  of  my  He^rt  was  cfpecially  /m- 
tated  with  ihc(c  17iings  following  : 

I.  The 


j^L  22l     a/ Mn  David  Bralnerd.     A.D.1739.       ^ 

I.  The /i r iSf ne/i  cJ:thed\v\ne  Law.  For  I  found  it  Was  >m- 
lioflible  for  me  (after  my  utraoftPains)  to  anfwer  iheDemandsof 
it.  1  often  made  new  Refolutions,  and  as  often  broke  thrm.  I 
imputed  the  whale  to  Carelefnefs,  and  the  Want  of  being  more 
VVacchfuI,  and  ufed  to  call  my  felf  a  Fool  for  my  Negligence  : 
But  when,  upon  a  ftronger  Refolution,  and  greater  Endeavours, 
and  clofe  Application  of  my  felf  to  Faftrng  and  Prayer,  I  found 
all  Attempts  fail,  then  I  quarrelled  with  the  Law  of  God,  as 
unreafonably  rigid.  I  thought,  if  it  extended  only  to  my  out- 
ward Adions  andBchaviours,  I  coujd  bear  with  it  :  But  I  found 
it  condemned  me  for  my  evil  Thoughts,  and  Sins  of  my 
Heart,  which  I  could  not  poflibly  prevent.  I  was  extreamly 
loth  to  give  out,  and  own  my  utter  Helplefnefs  in  this  Matter  : 
But  after  repeated  Difappointments,  thought  that,  rather  than 
perifh,  I  could  do  a  little  more  flill,  efpecially  if  fuch  ard  fuch 
Circumftances  might  but  attend  my  Endeavours  and  Strivings  5 
1  hoped,  that  I  fhould  ftrive  more  earneftly  than  ever,  if  the 
Matter  came  to  Extremity  (  iho'  I  never  could  find  the  Time  to 
do  my  utmoftjin  the  Manner  {  intended  :)  And  this  Hope  of  fu- 
ture more  favourable  Circumftance??.,  and  of  doing  fomethirg 
great  hereafter,  kept  me  from  utterDefpair  in  my  felf,  and  from 
feeing  my  felf  fallen  into  the  Hands  of  a  fovereign  God,  and 
dependent  on  nothing  but  free  and  boundlefs  Grace. 

2.  Another  Thing  was,  that  Faith  alone  was  the  Condition  ef 
Salvation  j  and  that  God  wouM  hot  come  down  to  lowerTerms ^ 
that  he  would  not  promife  Life  and  Salvation  upon  my  fincere 
and  hearty  Prayers  and  Endeavours,  That  Word,  Mark  xvi.  i6, 
iieihat  believeth  not^Jhall  be  damned,  cut  ofF  all  Hope  there  : 
And  1  found.  Faith  was  the  fovereign  Gift  of  God  ;  that  I 
could  not  get  it  as  of  my  felf,  and  could  not  obligeGod  to  beflow 
it  upon  me,  by  any  of  my  Performances.  (  Eph.  ii.  i,  5c  8.  ) 
Thisy  I  was  ready  to  fay,  //  a  hard  Sayings  who  can  hear  it  P  I 
could  not  bear,  that  all  1  had  done  fhould  ftand  for  mecr  nothing, 
t^ho  had  been  very  Confciencious  in  Duty,  and  had  been  ex- 
ceeding religious  a  great  while,-  and  had  (  as  f  thought  )  done 
much  more  than  niany  others  that  had  obtained  Mercy.  I  con- 
fefs'd  indeed  the  Vilenefs  of  my  Duties  ;  but  then,  what  made 
'em  at  that  Time  feem  vile,  was  my  wandring  Thoughts  in 
them  J  not  becaufe  I  was  all  over  defiled  like  a  Devil,  and 
the  Principle  corrupt  from  whence  they  flowed,  fo  that  I  cculd 
not  poflibly  do  any  Thing  that  was  Good.  And  therefore  I 
Called  whit  I  did,  by  the  Name  of  honeft  faithful  Endeavours  5 
and  could  ngtbear  it^thatGod  had  made  noPromifesof  Salvation' 
^  th^iay        -     -  g.  ^^  Another 


10      2Et.  22."         5^;^^  LIFE         A.D.  1739. 

3.  Another  Thing  was,  that  1  could  not  find  out  what  Faith 
was  ;  or  what  it  was  to  believe,  and  corrn  to  Chrijl,  \  read  the 
Calls  of  Chiift,  made  to  the  zveary  and  heav)  laden  ;  but  could 
£nd  no  IVay^  ihat  he  dirc6ted  them  to  come  in.  I  thought,  I 
would  gladly  come,  if  (  knew  how^  tho*  the  Path  of  Duty 
directed  to  were  never  fo  difficult.  I  read  Mr.  Stoddard*^ 
Guide  t  Chri/i  (  v/hich  1  truft  was,  in  the  Hand  of  God,  the 
h^'ppy  Means  of  my  Converfion  )  And  my  Heart  rofe  againft  the 
Author  ;  for  tho*  he  told  me  my  very  Heart  all  along  under 
Convidaions,  and  feem'd  to  be  very  beneficial  to  me  in  his  Di- 
re6lions  ;  yet  here  he  fail'd,  He  did  not  tell  me  any  Thing  I 
could  do,  that  would  bring  me  to  Chrift,  but  left  me  as  it  were 
with  a  great  Gulf  between  me  and  Chrift,  vi^ithout  any  Dire(5li- 
on  to  get  through.  For  I  was  not  yet  effedually  and  experi- 
mentally taught,  that  there  could  be  no  Way  prefcribed,  where- 
by a  natural  Man  could,  of  his  own  Strength,  obtain  that  which 
is  fupernatural,  and  which  the  highefi  Angel  cannot  give. 

4.  Another  Tl)ir!g  that  I  found  a  great  inward  Oppofition  to, 
was  the  Sovereignty  of  God.  I  could  not 'bear,  that  it  fhould  be 
wholly  at  God's  Pleafure,  to  fave  or  damn  me,  juft  as  he  would. 
That  Paflage,  Rom.  ix.ii,— -23.  was  aconftant  Vexation  tome, 
efpecially  Verfe  21.  The  reading  or  meditating  on  this  always 
deilroyed  my  Teeming  good  Frames  :  When  1  thought  I  was 
almoft  humbled,  and  almoft  refigned  to'  God's  Sovereignty,  the 
reading  or  thinking  on  this  PaiTage  would  make  my  Enmity 
againit  the  Sovereignty  of  God  appear.  And  v^hen  I  came  to 
n liv;6l  en  my  inward  Enmity  and  Blafphemy,  that  arofe  on 
this  Occafion,  I  was  the  more  afraid  of  God,  and  driven  further 
from  any  Hopes  of  Reconciliation  with  him  ;  and  it  gave  me 
fuch  a  dreadful  View  of  my  fclf,  that  I  dreaded  more  than  ever 
to  fee  myfclf  inGod'sFlancJs,and  at  his  fovereign  Difpofal,  and  it 
made  me  more  oppofite  than  ever  to  fubmit  to  his  Sovereignty  ; 
for  I  thoui;ht  God  defigned  my  Damnation.-— 

All  this  Time  the  Spirit  of  God  was  powerfully  at  work  with 
r^e  ;  and  I  was  inwardly  prefTcd  to  relinquiO>all  Self- Confidence, 
all  Hopes  of  ever  helping  mv  felf  by  any  Means  whatfoever  : 
And  the  Convic^iion  of  my  loji  Eftate  was  fometimes  {q  clear  and 
manifeft  before  my  P^yes,  that  it  was  a5  if  it  had  been  declared  to 
me  in  (bmany  Words,  "  'Tis  done,  'tis  done,  'tis  forever  im- 
polTible  to  deliver  your  {^\l  "  For  about  three  or  four  Days,  my 
iJoul  W3s  thus  diftrefred,  efpecially  at  fome  Turns,  when  for  a 
few  Moaienis  1  fcemed  to  my  k\l  loit  and  undone  \  but  then 

would 


J?/.  2  2.      c/ Mr.  David  Braincrd.     A.D.   1739.     11 

would  (brink  back  immediately  from  the  Sight,  becaufe  I  dared 
not  venture  my  felf  into  the  Hands  of  God,  as  wholly  hc]^)lcrb% 
and  at  the  Dirpofal  of  his  fovereign  Pleafure.  1  dared  net  (ee 
that  important  Truth  concerning  my  fclf.  That  I  was  ^/^<7^//;2 
Trefpajps  and  Sins.  But  when  I  had  as  it  were  thruft  away  thcfe 
Views  of  my  felf  at  any  Time,  I  felt  diftrelled  to  have  the  fame 
Difcoveries  of  my  felf  again;  for  I  greatly  feared  being  given 
over  of  God  to  final  Stupidity.  When  I  thought  of  putting  it 
oiF  to  a  msre  convenient  Sea/on,  the  Corwiaion  was  fo  clofe  and 
powerful  with  Regaid  to  the  prefent  Time,  that  it  was  the 
beft  Time,  and  probably  the  only  Time,  that  I  dared  not  put  it 
ofF.  It  was  the  Sight  of  Truth  concerning  my  felf,  Jruthjd- 
peding  my  State,  as  a  Creature  fallen  and  alienated  from  God, 
and  that  confequently  could  makenoDemands  onGod  forMercy, 
but  muft  fubfcfibe  to  the  abfolute  Sovereignty  of  the  divir.e  Be- 
ing ;  the  Sight  of  the  Truth,  I  fay,  my  Soul  fhrank  away  from, 
and  trembled  to  think  of  beholding.  Thus,  he  that  doth  Evil  (as 
all  unregenerate  Men  continually  do  )  hates  the  Light  of  Truths 
neither  cares  to  come  to  it,  becaufe  it  will  reprove  his  Deeds,  and 
(hew  him  his  juft  Deferts.  (  Joh,  iii.20.)  And  tho',  fome  Time 
before,  I  had  taken  much  Pains  (  as  I  thought )  to  fubmit  to  the 
Sovereignty  of  God,  yet  I  miflook  theThing  ;  and  did  not  once 
imagine,  that  feeing  and  being  made  experimentally  fenfible  of 
this  Truth,  which  my  Soul  now  fo  much  dreaded  and  trembled 
at  a  Senfeof,  was  the  Frame  of  Soul  that  I  had  bt^n  fo  ear- 
neft  in  purfuit  of  heretofore  :  For  I  had  ever  hoped,  that  whea 
I  had  attained  to  that  Humiliation,  which  I  fuppofed  necelTary  to 
go  before  Faith,  then  it  would  not  be  fair  forGod  to  caji  me  off% 
but  now  I  faw  it  was  fo  far  from  any  Goodnefs  in  me,  to  own 
my  felf  fplritually  dead,  and  deftitute  of  all  Goodnefs,  that,  en 
the  contrary,  my  Mouth  would  be  ^oxtwa  ftop'd  by  it  ;  and  it 
look'd  as  dreadful  to  me,  to  fee  my  fe]f,and  the  Relation  I  fiood 
in  to  God,  as  a  Sinner  and  a  Criminal,  and  he  a  great  Judge  and 
Severeian,  as  it  would  be  to  a  poor  trembling  Creature,  to  ven- 
ture ofFfo-ne  high  Precipice.  And  hence  1  put  it  oil' for  a  Mi- 
nute or  two,  and  tried  for  better  Circumftances  to  do  it  in  ;  ei- 
ther I  muft  read  a  PalTage  or  two,  or  pray  firfi,  or  fomething  of 
the  like  Nature  5  or  elfe  put  off  my  Submiffion  to  God*s  Sove- 
reignty, with  an  Objeaion,  that  I  did  not  know  how  to  fubmit  : 
But  the  Truth  was,  I  could  fee  no  Safety  in  owning  my  felf  m 
the  Hands  of  a  Sovereign  God,  and  that  i  could  lay  no  Claim  to 
any  Thing  better  than  Damnation. 

C  2  But 


j2     ^/.  22.  Ihs  LIFE  A.  D.  1739; 

But  after  a  confidcrablc  Time  fpent  In  fuch  like  Exercifes  an4 
Diftrefles,  oneMorning,  while  I  was  walking  in  a  folitary  Place 
as  ufual,  I  at  once  faw  that  all  my  Contrivances  and  Projedtionj 
%o  effcdl  or  procure  Deliverance  and  Salvation  for  mv  felf,  were 
Vtterly  in  vain  :  I  was  brought  <^uite  to  a  (land,  as  finding  my 
felf  totally  h/i.  J  had  thought  many  Times  before,  that  the 
Difficulties  in  my  Way  were  very  great  :  But  now  I  faw,  in  ano- 
ther and  very  different  Light,  that  it  w?s  forever  impoffible  for 
rne  to  do  any  Thing  towards  helping  or  delivering  my  felf.  I 
then  thought  of  blaming  my  felf,  that  I  had  not  done  more,  and 
been  more  engaged,  while  I  hadOpportunity  (  for  it  feemed  nov^ 
as  if  the  Seafon  of  doing  was  forever  over  and  gone  )  But  I  in- 
ihntly  faw,  that  let  me  have  done  what  I  would,  it  would  no 
rnore  have  tended  to  my  helping  my  felf ;  than  what  I  had  done  ; 
that  1  had  made  all  the  Pleas,  1  ever  could  have  made  to  all 
Eternity  j  and  that  all  my  Pleas  were"  vaiq.  The  Tumult  that 
had  been  before  in  my  Mind,  was  now  quieted  ;  and  I  was  fome- 
thing  eafed  of  that  Diftref^,  which  I  felt,  while  Itruggling  a- 
^ainfta  Sight  of  my  felf,  and  of  tb,e  divine  Sovereignty,  fhad 
the  greateft  Certainty,  that  my  State  was  forever  miferable,  for 
all  that  I  could  do  ;  and  wondered,  and  was  almoft  aftoniflied, 
that!  had  never  been  fenfible  of  it  before,  - 

Jn  the  Time  while  I  remainM    In  this  State,   njy  Notions  rcf- 
j^eaing  my  i>i///Vj,  were  quite  different   from  what  I   had  ever 
entertained  in  Times  pad.     Before  this,  the  more  I  did  inDuty, 
fhe  more  1  thought  God   was  obliged   to  me  ;  or  at  leaft  the 
more  hard  I  thought  it  would  be  for  God  to  caft  me  off  ;   *tho 
at  the  fame  Time  I  confeiltd,  and  thought  I  faw,  that  there  was 
no  Goodnefs  or  Merit  in  my  Duties :   But  now   the  morel  did 
in  Prayer  or  any  other  Duty,  the  more  I  faw  [  was  indebted   tor 
iiod  for  allowing  me  to  aft  lor  Mercy  ;  For  I  faw,  it  was' Self- -^ 
Intereft  had   led  me  to  pray,  and   that  I  had  never  once  prayed   . 
from  anv  Refpea  to  the  C^lon'  of  God.  Now  1  dw,   there  was 
no  neceflary  Conncaion   between  my  Pravers  and  the  Beftow- 
ment  of  divine  Mcrcv  ;   that   they  laid   not  the  leaft  Obligation 
upon  God  to  beffow  his  Grace  upon  mc  ;  and  that  there  was 
DO  more  Vertuc  or  Goodnefs  in  them,   than  there'  would  be  ia 
niy  paddling  with  my  Hand  in  the  Water  (  whxh  was  the  (Com- 
panion I  had  then  in  my  Mini)   and  this  becaufe  they  were  not 
performed  from  any  Love  or  Regard  to  God.     I  faw,  that  I  had 
l^ccn  heaping  up  my  Devotions  before  God,  Fa  ft  ing,  Praying  d5r><:,     ' 
prc;e::ding,  and  indeed  really    thinking,  at  fome  Times,   that  I 


W2S 


Mt.it'      ^/ iVfr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.1739.     13 

IBvas  aiming  at  the  Glory  of  God  ;  whereas  [  never  once  truly 
intended  it,  but  only  my  own  Happ'nefs.  I  faw,  that,  as  I  had 
never  done  any  Thing /cr  God,  1  had  no  Claim  to  lay  to  any 
Thing  from  him,  but  Perdition,  on  Account  of  my  Hypocrify 
and  Mockery.  Oh  how  different  did  my  Duties  now  appear 
from  what  they  ufed  to  do  !  I  ufed  to  chargt  them  with  Sin  and 
Imperfc<5lion  ;  But  this  was  only  onAccount  of  the  Wandrings 
and  vain  Thoughts  attending  them,  and  not  becaufe  I  had  no 
Kegard  to  God  in  them  ;  for  this  I  thought  I  had  :  But  when 
I  faw  evideiitly  that  1  had  Regard  to  nothing  but  Self-Intereft, 
then  they  appeared  vile  Mockery  of  God,  Sclf-Worfhip,  and  a 
continual  Courle  of  Lies  ;  {0  that  I  faw  now,  there  was  fome- 
thing  worfe  had  attended  my  Duties,  than  barely  a  few  Wan- 
drings &c.  For  the  whole  was  nothing  but  Self-Worfhip  and 
an  horrid  Abufe  of  God. 

I  continued,  as  I  remember,  in  this  State  of  Mind,  from  Fri- 
day-Morning *till  the  Sabbath-Evening  following,ya/y  12.  1739. 
when  I  was  walking  again  in  the  fame  folitary  Place  where  £ 
was  brought  to  fee  my  felf  loft  and  helplefs  (  as  was  before  men- 
tion'dj  and  here,  in  a  mournful  melancholy  State,  was  attempt- 
ing to  pray  ;  but  found  noHeart  to  engage  in  that,  or  any  other 
Duty  ;  my  former  Concern  and  Exercife  and  religious  Affe6ti- 
ons  were  now  gone.  I  thought, the  Spirit  of  God  had  quite  left 
me  ;  but  ftill  was  not  diftrefled  :  Yet  difconfolate,  as  if  there 
was  nothing  in  Heaven  or  Earth  could  nsake  me  happy.  And 
having  been  thus  endeavouring  to  pray  (tho'  being,  as  I  thought, 
very  ffupid  and  fenfelefs  )  for  near  haU  an  Hour,  (  and  by  this 
'  Time  the  Sun  was  about  half-an-hour-high,  as  I  remember  ) 
then,  as  I  was  walking  in  a  dark  thick  Grove,  unfpeakabk  Glory 
feemed  to  open  to  the  View  and  Apprehenfion  of  my  Soul :  I 
don't  ^nean  any  external  Brightnefs,  for  I  faw  no  fuch  Thing, 
nor  do  I  intend  any  Imagination  of  a  Body  of  Light,  fome 
where  away  in  the  third  Heavens,  or  any  Thing  of  thaiNature  j 
but  it  was  a  new  inward  Apprehenfion  or  View  that  I  had  of 
GODy  fuch  as  1  never  had  before,  nor  anyThing  which  had  the 
leaft  Refemblance  of  it.  I  flood  ftill,  and  wonder'd  and  ad- 
mired !  I  knew  that  1  never  had  feen  before  any  Thing  com- 
parable to  it  for  Excellency  and  Beauty  :  It  was  widely  different 
?roi?h  all  theConceptions,fhat  ever  I  had  had  of  God,  orThingg 
divjne.  I  had  no  particular  Apprehenfion  of  any  one  Perfon  in 
the' Trinity,  either  the  Father,  the  Son,  or  the  Holy  Ghoft  ; 
^lit  it  appeared  10  be  i^iyinf  Glory,  that  I  then  beheld  :  And  my 

Soi^ 


14     >S"/.  2  2.  5".^^  LIFE  A.D.1739; 

Soul  rejovced  with  Joy  unfpeakabley  to  fee  fuch  a  God,  fuch  a 
glorious  divine-Being  ;  and  1  was  inwardly  pleafed  and  fatisficd, 
that  he  fhould  be  God  over  all  forever  and  ever.  My  Soul  v^-as 
fo  captivated  and  delighted  with  the  Excellency,  Lovehnefs, 
Greatncfs,  and  other  Perfections  of  God,  that  I  was  even 
fwallowed  up  in  Him  ;  at  leaft  to  that  Degree,  that  1  had  no 
Thought  (  as  I  remember )  at  fr^^  about  my  own  Salvation, 
and  Icarce   rcflecSled  there  was  fuch  a  Creature  as  my  felf. 

ThusGod,  I  truft, brought  me  to  a  heartyDifpofnion  to  exalt 
himy  and  fet  him  on  the  Throne,  and  principally  and  ultimately 
to  aim  at  his  Honour  and  Glory,  as  King  of  the  Univerfe. 

I  continued  in  this  State  of  inward  Joy  2nd  Peace,  yet 
Aftonifhment,  'till  near  Dark,  without  any  fenfible  Abatement  i 
and  then  began  to  think  and  examine  what  I  had  feen  ;  and 
felt  fwcetly  compofed  in  my  Mind  ail  the  Evening  following  : 
I  felt  myfelf  in  a  new  World,  and  every  Thing  about  me  ap- 
peared with  a  different  Afpedt  from  what  it  was  wont  to  do. 

At  this  Time,  the  Way  of  Salvation  opened  to  me  with  fuch 
infinite  VVirdom,Suitableners  and  Excellency,  that  I  wondered 
I  fliould  ever  think  of  any  other  Way  of  Salvation  ;  was  a- 
mazed,  that  I  had  not  drop'd  my  own  Contrivances,  and  com- 
plied with  this  lovely  blcfled  and  excellent  Way  before.  If  I 
could  have  been  faved  by  my  own  Duties,  or  any  other  Way 
that  I  had  formerly  contrived,  my  whole  Soul  would  nov/ have 
refufed.  I  wondered,  that  all  theVVorld  did  not  fee  and  comply 
with  this  Way  of  Salvation,  intirely  by  the  Right eoujnejs  of 
Chrifi, 

The  fweet  Relifti  of  what  I  then  felt,  continued  with  me 
for  feveralDays,  almofl  conftantly,  in  a  greater  or  lefsDegree: 
I  could  not  but  fwcetly  rejoyce  in  God,  lying  down  and  ri- 
fing  up.  The  next  Lordi-Day  I  felt  fomething  of  the  fame 
Kind  ;  tho*  not  fo  powerful  as  before.  But,  not  long  after, 
was  again  involved  in  thick  Darknejs,2ind  under  great  Di^refs  : 
yet  not  of  the  fame  Kind  with  my  Diftrefs  under  Convittions. 
I  was  guilty,  afraid  and  afliamed  to  come  before  God,  was 
exceedingly  prefb'd  wirh  a  Senfc  of  Guilt  :  But  it  was  nof  long 
before  I   felt   (  I  trul^ )  true  Repentance  and  Joy   in  God. 

About  the  latter  End  of  Auguft^  I  again  fell  under  great  Dfark- 
nefs ;  It  feem'd  as  if  the  Prefence  of  God  yKZ%  clean  gone  foreVer. 
Tho'  I  was  not  fo  much  diftrefled  about  my  fpiritual  State,  ,as  I 
"was  at  my  being  (hut  out  from  God's  Prefence,  as  I  then  feijifi- 
blywas.  But  it  plcafed  the  Lord,  to  return  gracioufly  to  me, 
not  long  after. 

In 


uS"/.  22,23.    ^/ Mr.  David  Bralnerd.     A.D.1739;   '^5 

In  the  Beginning  of  Septemherl  went  to  College  J,  and  entred 
there  :  Hut  with  fume  Degree  of  Reludlancy, fearing  lefi  I  fhould 
not  be  able  to  lead  a  Life  of  ftridt  Religion,   in  the  midlt  of  fo 

many  Teniptations After  this,  in  the  Vacancy,  before  { 

went  to  tarry  at  College,  it  pleafed  God  ro  vific  my  Soul  with 
cIc'T  r  Manifeftations  of  himfelf  and  his  Grace.  I  was  fpending 
fomeTime  in  Prayerj&  Self-Examination  ;  and  the  Lord  by  his 
Grace  (o  (hined  into  my  Heart,  that  I  enjoyed  full  Affurance 
of  hii.  Favour,  for  that  Time  ;  and  my  Soul  was  unfpeakably 
refreflied  with  divine  and  heavenly  Enjoyments.  At  this  Time 
efpeciaily,  as  well  as  fome  others,  fundry  PafTages  of  God's 
fFord  open'c'^  to  my  Soul  with  divine  Clearnefs,  Power  and 
Sweetnefs,  fo  as  to  appear  exceeding  precious,  and  with  clear 
and  certain  Evidence  of  it's  being  tbe  ^Vord  of  God.  I  enjoy'd 
connderabieSweetnefs  in  Religion  all  the  Winter  following. 

In  Jan.  1739,40.  The  MeaJIei  fpread  much  in  College  ;  and 
I  having  taken  theDiflemper,  went  hometo  Haddam :  But  f.  ms 
Days  before  I  was  taken  Sick,  I  feem'd  to  be  greatly  deferted, 
and  my  Soul  mourned  the  Abfence  of  the  Comforter  exceedin:-;- 
ly  :  It  feem'd  to  me,  all  Comfort  was  forever  gone;  I  pray 'J 
and  cried  to  God  for  Help,  yet  found  no  prcfent  Comfort  or 
Relief.  But  thro' divine  Goodnefs,  a  Night  or  two  before  I 
was  taken  ill,  while  1  was  walking  alone  in  a  very  retired  Place, 
and  engaged  in  Meditation  and  Prayer,  I  enjoyed  a  fweet  re- 
freftiing  Vifit,  as  I  trufl,  from  above,  {o  that  my  Soul  wr.s  raifed 
far  above  the  Fears  oi  Death  ;  indeed  I  rather  longed  lorD?ath, 
than  feared  it.  O  how  much  more  refrefhing  this  one  Seafoa 
wa%  than  all  the  Pleafures  and  Delights  that  Earth  can  afF.-rd  \ 
After  a  Day  or  two  I  was  taken  with  the  Meafles,  and  was  very 
111  indeed,  fo  that  I  almofl  defpaired  of  Life:  But  had  no  di(- 
trefiin?.  Fears  of  Death  at  all.  However  thro'  divine  Gopdnefi 
I  foon  recovered  :  Yet,  by  Reafon  of  hard  and  clofe  Studies, and 
being  much  expofed  on  Account  of  my  Frefaman-fhip,  I  had 
but  little  Time  for  fpiritual  Duties;  my  Soul  often  mourned  foe 
Want  of  more  Time  and  Opportunity  to  be  alonevvith  God» 
Lt  the  Sprinj^  and  Summer  folloiving  f  h.id  better  A j vantages 
ior  Retirement,  and  enjoyed  more  Comfort  m  Religion  :  Tho' 
indeed  my  Ambition  in  mv  Studies  oreatlj,'  wronged  the  Activity 
and  Vigour  of  mv'fpiritual  Li/e  :  Yet  thi?  was  uTjally  the  Cafe 
with  me,  that  in  the  Multitude  of  tny  T'hcug'hts  vjithin  rrn,  God''s 
Ccmforts  principallv  dsiightedmy  Scul :  Thefe  were  my  gr&atefl 
Confolations  Day  by  Day. 

t  Yale- College  in  New-  Havm,  Ons 


1 6     J£t.  23:  lbs  LIFE  A.  a  174a: 

One  Day  I  remember  in  particular  (  I  think  it  was  in  Jun6 
1740.  )  I  walked  to  a  confidcrable  Diftance  from  the  Collegp, 
in  the  Fields  alone  at  Noon,  and  in  Prayer  found  fuch  unfpeak- 
able  Sweetnefs  and  Delight  in  God,  that  I  thought,  if  I  muft 
continue  ftill  in  this  evil  World,  I  wanted  always  to  be  there,  to' 
behold  God's  Glory  :  My  Soul  dearly  loved  all  Mankind,  and 
longed  exceedingly  that  they  fhould  enjoy  what  I  enjoyed. 
it  feem'd   to  be  a  little  Refemblance  of  f^eaven. 

On  Lord's- Day,  July  6.  being  Sacrament- Day,  I  found  fome 
divine  Life  and  fpiritual  Refrefhment  in  that  holy  Ordinance. 
When  i  came  from  the  Lord's  Table,  I  wondered  how  my  Fel- 
low-Students could  live  as  I   wzs  fenfible  moft  did •  Next 

Lord's-Day  July  13.  I  had  fome  fpecial  Sweetnefs  in  Religion — 
Again  Lord's-Day  July  20.  my  Soul  was  in  a  fwcet  and  preci- 
ous Frame. 

Sometime  in  Auguft  following,  I  became  {o  weakly  and 
difordered,  by  too  clofe  Application  to  my  Studies,  that  I  was 
advifed  by  my  Tutor  to  go  Home,  and  difengage  my  Mind  from 
Study,  as  much  as  I  could  ;  fori  was  grown  fo  Weak,  that  I 
began  to  fpit  Blood.  I  took  his  Advice,  and  endeavoured  to  lay 
afide  my  Studies.  But  being  brought  very  low,  I  look'd  Death 
in  the  Face  more  ftedfaftly  ;  and  the  Lord  was  pleafed  to  give 
me  renewedly  a  fweet  Senfe  and  Relifh  of  divine  Things ;  and 
particularly  in  O^ober  13,  I  found  divine  Help  and  Confolation 
in  the  precious  Duties  ot  fecret  Prayer  and  Self  Examination, 
and  mySoultookDelight  iniheblefled  God  :---fo  likewifeon  the 
lj[hof  O^oter. 

Saturday  OSfoher  18.  in  my  Morning-Devotions,  my  Soul 
tvas  exceedingly  melted  for  and  bitterly  mourned  over  my  ex- 
ceeding Sinfulnefi  and  P^iler.efs.  I  never  before  had  felt  fo  pun- 
gent and  deep  a  Senfe  of  the  odious  Nature  of  Sin, as  at  thisTimeo 
My  Soul  was  then  unufually  carry'd  forth  m  Lovs  to  God,  and 
had  a  lively  Senfe  of  God's  Love  to  me.  And  this  Love  and 
Hope,  at  that  Time,  caft  out  Fear.  Both  Morning  and  Even- 
ing I  fpent  fome  Time  in  S-^lf- Examination,  to  find  the  Truth  of 
Grace,  as  alfo  my  Fitntfs  to  approach  to  God  at  his  Table  ther 
next  Day  ;  and  through  infinite  Grace,  found  the  holy  Spirit 
irfluencin-g  my  Soul  with  Love  to  God,  as  a  PVitneJi  within  my 

Lord's- Day  OBqUt  19.  In  the  Morning,  I  felt  my  Soul  hun- 
gring  andthirji'wg  ofter  RightcQufnef,.  In  the  Fore-Noon,  while 
I  w,;s  locskina  on  the  SfxrajPcnui  Element?,  and  thinking  that 
Jejui  Chriji  would  foctt  be/^/  forth  crucij>(d  hsfifimi  tny  Soul' 


'^;,  23:    of  Mr,  David  Braineid.     A.D.  1741:     17 

■^as  fiird  with  Light  and  Love,  fo  that  I  was  almoft  m  an  Ex- 
tafy  ;  my  Body  was  fo  weak,  I  could  fcarcely  (hnd,  I  lelt  at 
the  fame  Time  an  exceeding  Tendernefs  and  moft  fervent  Love 
towards  all  Mankind  ;  fo  that  my  Soul  and  all  the  Powers  of 
it  feemed,  as  it' were,  to  melt  into  Softnefs  and  Sweetnefs. 
But  in  the  Seafon  of  theCommunion  there  was  feme  Abatement 
of  this  fweet  Life  and  Fervour.  This  Love  and  Joy  cafi  out 
Fear  5  and  my  Soul  longed  for  perfect  Grace  and  Glory,  Thii 
fweet  Frame  continued  'till  the  Evening,  when  my  Soul  was 
fweetly  fpiritual  in  fecret  Duties, 

Monday,  OSfober  20.  I  again  found  thefweet  Affiftanceof  the 
Jioly  Spirit  in  fecret  Duties,  both  Morning  and  Evenings  and 
Life  and  Comfort  in  Religion  through  the  whole  Day. 

Tuefday,  OSfober  21.  I  had  likewifeExperience  of  iheGood- 
nefs  of  God  in  Jhedding  abroad  his  Love  in  rhy  Hearty  and  giv- 
ing me  Delight  and  Confolation  in  religious  Duties.  And  all 
the  remaining  Part  of  the  Week,  my  Soul  feemed  to  be  taken 
up  with  divine  Things.  I  now  fo  longed  after  God,  and  to  be 
freed  from  Sin,  that  when  I  felt  myfelf  recovering,  and  thought 
!  muft  return  to  College  again,  which  had  proved  fo  hurtful 
to  my  fpiritual  Intereft  theYearpaft,  I  could  not  but  be  grieved, 
and  I  thought  I  had  much  rather  have  died  ;  for  it  diftrefs'd 
me,  to  think  of  getting  away  from  God.  But  before  I  went,  I 
enjoyed  feveral  other  fweet  and  precious  Seafons  of  Communiorj 
with  God  (  particularly  Oiiober  30,  and  Nov.  4.  )  wherein  my 
Soul  enjoyed  unfpeakable  Comfort. 

I  returned  to  College  about  November  6.  and  through  the 
Goodncfs  of  God  felt  the  Power  of  Religion  alraoft  daily,  for 
the  Space  of  fix  Weeks. 

November  28.  In  my  Evening-Devotion,  I  enjoyed  precious 
Difcoverics  of  God,  and  was  unfpeakably  refreflied  with  that 
Paflage  Heb,  xii.  22,  23,  24.  That  my  5oul  longed  to  wing 
away  for  the  Paradile  of  God  ;  I  longed  to  be  conformed  to 
God  in  all  Things.---  A  Day  or  two  after,  I  enjoyed  much 
of  the  Light  »f  God^s  Countenance^  moft  of  the  Day  3  and  my 
Soul  reftcd  in  God. 

Tuefday,  December  9.  I  was  in  a  comfortable  Frame  of  Soul 
snoft  of  the  Day  j  but  efpecially  in  Evening-Devotions,  when 
God  was  pleafed  wonderfully  to  affift  and  ftrengthen  me  ;  (o 
that  I  thought  nothing  fhould  ever  move  me  from  the  Love  of 
God  in  Chriftjefus  my  Lord. —-0  !  one  Hour  with  God  infinite- 
ly exceeds  all  the  Pleatures  and  Delights  of  this  lowei:  World. 

jt)  Jjome- 


i8   Alt.  23,2^.     ^'he  LIFE     A.D.  1741  &f  i'7;i2: 

Sometime  towards  thelatterEnd  oi  January  1740,41.  I  greY7 
more  fc/^  and  ^«// in  Matters  of  Religion,  by  Means  of  my 
old  Temptation,  viz.  Ambition  in  my  Studies.—  But  thro* 
divine  Goodnefs,  a  great  and  general  Awakening  fpread  it  feli 
over  the  College,  about  the  latter  End  of  February^  in  which  I 
was  much  quickned,and  more  abtartdantly  engaged  in  Religion^ 

[  This  Awakening  here  fpoken  of,  v/as  at  the  Beginning  of 
that  extraordinary  religious  Commotion  through  the  Land, 
which  is  frefh  in  every  one's  Memory.  This  Awakening  was 
for  a  Time  very  great  and  general  at  Jslew-Haven  ;  and  the 
College  had  no  fmall  Share  in  it  :  That  Society  was  greatly  re- 
formed, the  Students  in  general  became  ferious,  and  many  of 
<hem  remarkably  fo,and  much  engaged  in  the  Concerns  of  their 
eternal  Salvation.  And  however  undefirable  the  IlTue  of  the 
Awakenings  of  that  Day  have  appeared  in  many  others,  there 
have  been  manifeftly  happy  and  abiding  EiFedis  of  the  Impreili- 
cns  then  made  on  the  Minds  of  many  of  the  Members  of  that 
College,  And  by  all  that  1  can  learn  concerning  Mr.  Brainerdy 
there  can  be  no  Reafon  to  doubt  but  that  he  had  much  of  God's 
gracious  Prefence,  and  of  the  lively  Adings  of  true  Grace,  at 
that  Time  :  But  yet  he  was  afterwards  abundantly  fenfible,  that 
ills  religious  Experiences  and  AiFe6lions  at  that  Time  were  not 
free  from  a  corrupt  Mixture,  nor  his  Conduct  to  be  acquitte-d 
from  many  Things  that  were  imprudent  and  blamcable  ;  which 
he  greatly  lamented  himfelf,  and  was  willing  that  others  fliouid 
forget,  that  none  might  make  an  ill  Improvement  of  fuch  anEx- 
ampfe.  And  therefore  altho'  in  the  Time  of  it,  he  kept  a  con- 
ftant  Diary^  containing  a  very  particular  Account  of  what 
pafs'd  from  Day  to  Day,  for  the  next  thirteen  Months,  from 
the  latter  End  of  January^  1740,41.  foremention'd,  in  two 
fmall  Books,  which  he  called  the  two  firft Volumes  of  hisDiary, 
next  following  the  Account  before  given  of  his  Convictions, 
Converfion,  and  confequent  Comforts  5  yef,  when  he  lay  on  his 
Death-Bed,  he  gaveOrder  (unknown  to  me, 'till  after  hisDeatl>) 
that  tbefc  two  V^olumes  fhould  be  defiroyed,  and  in  the  Begin- 
ning of  the  third  Book  of  hisDiary,  he  wrote  thus,  (  by  the 
Hand  of  another, he  not  being  able  to  write  himfelf )  *  'The  two 
•*  preceeding  Volumes,  immediately  following  the  Account  of 
**  the  Author 'sConverfian, are  lofl.  If  any  are  detirous  to  know 
•*  how  the  AuthoY  lived,  in  general, during  that  Space  of  Time, 
"•'  let  them  read  the  fiill  thirty  Pages  of  this  Volume  j  whers 
•*  they  will  find  fgmething  of  a  Specimen  Qt  his  ordinary  Man- 


JEA23,24.   <7/iUr.DavidBraInerd  A.D.i74iCs?i742.  19 

*'^  ncr  of  Jiving,  through  that  whole  Spsrccof  Time,  which  wag 

*^  about  13  Months  ;  excepting  that  here  he  was  more  refined 

*'  from  fome  Imprudencies  and  indecent  Heats ^  than  there  ;   but 

*'  the  Spirit  of  Devotion  running  through  the  whole,   was  the 

''  fame." 

It  could  not  be  otherwife  than  that  One  whofe  Heart  had  been 
/b  prepared  and  drawn  to  God,  as  A4r.  Brainerdh  had  been, 
Ciould  be  mightily  enlarged,  animated  and  engaged,  at  the  5ight 
of  fuchan  Alteration  made  in  the  College,  the  Town  and  Land, 
and  fo  great  an  Appearance  of  Men's  reforming  theirLives,  and 
turning  from  their  Profanenefs  and  Immorality,  to  ^erioufnefs 
and  Concern  for  their  Salvation,  and  of  Religion's  reviving  and 
flourifhing  almoft  every  v/here.  But  as  an  intemperate  impru- 
dent Zeal,  and  a  Degree  of  Enthufiafm  foon  crept  in,  and  ming- 
led it  felf  with  that  Revival  of  Religion  ;  and  fo  great  and  gene- 
ral an  Awakening  being  quite  a  new  Thing  in  the  Land,  at  leaft 
as  to  all  the  living  Inhabitants  of  it  ;  neitherPeopie  norMinifters 
had  learn'd  thoroughly  to  diftinguifh  between  folid  Religion  and 
its  delufive  Counterfeits  ;  even  many  Minifters  of  the  Gofpel, 
of  long  (landing  and  the  beft  Reputation,  were  for  aTime  over- 
powered with  the  glaringAppearances  of  the  latter  :  And  there- 
fore furely  it  was  not  to  be  wondered  at,  thu  young  Brainerd^ 
but  a  Sophimore  at  College,  fliould  be  fo  ;  who  was  not  only 
young  in  Years,  but  very  young  in  Religion  and  Experience, 
and  had  had  but  little  Opportunity  for  the  Study  of  Divinity, 
and  ftill  lefs  for  Obfervation  of  the  Circumftances  and  Events 
of  fuchan  extraordinaryState  of  Things  ;  AManmuft  diveft  him- 
felf  of  allReafon,  to  make  ftrange  of  it.  In  thefe  diDdvantagious 
Circumftances,5rtf/«fr^had  the  Unhappinefs  to  have  aTinclure 
of  that  intemperate  indifcreet  Zeal,  which  v/as  at  that  Time  too 
prevalent;  and  was  led,  from  his  high  Opinion  of  others  that 
he  looked  upon  better  than  himfelf,  into  fuch  Errors  as  were 
really  contrary  to  the  habitual  Temper  of  his  Mind.  One  In- 
fiance  of  his  Mifcondudl  at  that  Time,  gave  greatOfFence  to  tha 
Rulers  of  the  College,  even  to  that  Degree  that  they  expelPd 
him  the  Society  ;  which  it  is  necelTary  fhould  here  be  particular- 
ly  related,  with  it's  Circumftances. 

In  the  Time  of  the  Awakening  at  College,  there  were  feveral 
religious  Students  that  aflbciated  themfelves  one  with  another 
for  mutual  Convcrfation  and  AlTiftance  in  fpiritual  Things,  who 
v;ere  wonc  freely  to  open  themfelves  @ne  to  another,  |s  fj^eciai 

D  2  and 


20      ^V.  24..  r^^^LIFE  A.D.  1742: 

2nd  intimate  Friends :  Brainerd  was  one  of  this  Company.  AncP 
it  once  happened,  that  he  and  two  or  three  more  of  thefe  his 
intimate  Friea^s  were  in  the  Hall  together,  after  Mr.  Whitieljey^ 
one  of  the  Tutors,  had  been  to  Prayer  there  with  the  Scholars  ; 
no  other  Perfon  now  remaining  in  the  Hall,  but  Brainerd  and 
thefe  his  Companions.  Mr.  jHittelfey  having  been  unufually 
pathetical  in  his  Prayer,  one  of  Brainerd's  Friends  on  this  Oc- 
cafion  afked  him  what  he  thought  of  Mr.  WhiUeljty  ;  He  made 
Anfwer,  He  hai  no  more  Grace  than  this  Chair.  One  of  the 
Fiefhmen  happening  at  that  Time  to  be  near  the  Hall  (tho*  not 
in  the  Room)  over-heard  thofe  Words  of  his  ;  tho*  he  heard 
no  Name  mentioned,  and  knew  not  who  the  Perfon  was,  which 
v/as  thus  cenfured  :  He  informed  a  certain  Woman  that  belonged 
to  the  Town,  withal  telJing  her  his  own  Sufpicion,  v;z.  that 
he  believ'd  Brainerd  faid  this  of  fome  one  or  other  of  the  Rulers 
of  the  College.  Whereupon  fhe  went  Sc  informed  the  Re£lor, 
who  ((^nt  for  tljis  Freftiman  and  examined  him  ;  and  he  told  the 
Redor  the  Words  that  he  heard  Brainerd  utter,  and  informed 
him  who  were  in  the  Hoom  with  him  at  that  Time.  Upoa 
which  the  Rcdtor  fent  for  them  :  They  were  very  backward  to 
inform  againft  their  Friend,  of  that  which  they  look'd  upon  gs 
private  Converfation,  and  efpecially  as  none  but  they  had  heard 
or  knev/  of  whom  he  had  uttered  thofe  Words ;  yet  the  Re£tor 
compell'd  them  to  declare  what  he  faid,  and  of  whom  he  faid 
it.—  Brainerd  look'd  on  himfelf  greatly  abufed  in  the  Manage- 
ment of  this  AfFair  ;  and  thought,  that  what  he  faid  in  private, 
vra§  injurioufiy  extorted  from  his  Friends,  and  that  then  it  was 
injurioufly  required  of  him  (as  it  was  wont  to  be  of  fuch  as  had 
been  guilty  ot  fome  open  notorious  Crime)  to  make  a  publick 
ConfefTun,   and  to  bumble  him.felf  before  the  whole  College  in 

the  Hall,  for  what  he  had  faid  only  in  private  Converfation. 

He  not  complying  with  this  Demand,  and  having  gone  once  to 
the  feparate  Wlteiin^  at  A^etu- Haven,  when  forbidden  by  the 
Rcdor,  and  alfo  hiving  been  sccufed  by  one  Perfon  of  faying 
concerning  the  Re6lor,  that  he  wondered  he  did  not  expert  to 
drop  down  dead  for  fining  the  Scholars  who  followed  Mr.  TV;?^^;?/ 
to  Mil  ford,  tho'  there  was  no  Proof  of  it  (and  Mr.  Brainend 
ever  profefs^d  that  he  did  not  remember  his  faying  any  Thing  to 
that  Purpofe)  for  thefe  Things  he  was  expell'd  the  College. 

Now,  how  far  the  Circumftances  and  Exigences  of  that  Day 
might  jultify  fach  great  Severity  in  the  Governors  of  iheColIege, 
1  will  UQt  undertaice  to  determine  j  it  being  my  Aim,  not  ta 

bring 


/E/.  24.-      cj  Mr.  David  Brainerd.      AD.  1742:    21^ 

bring  Reproach  on  the  Authority  of  the  College,  but  only  to  do 
Juftice  to  the  Memory  of  a  Perfon  who  1  think  to  be  eminently 

one  of  thofe  whofe  Memory  is  blejjed The  Reader  will  fee, 

in  the  Sequel  of  the  Story  of  Mr.  Brainerd^s  Life,  t  what  his 
own  Thoughts  afterwards  were  of  hisBehaviour  in  thcfeThings, 
and  in  how  Chriftian  a  Manner  he  condutSed  himfelf,  with  Ref- 
pe£l  to  this  Affair  ;  tho*  he  ever,  as  long  as  he  lived,  fuppofed 
himfelf  much  abufed,  in  the  Management  of  it,  and  in  what 
^e  fufFer'd  in  it, 

His  Expulfion  was  in  the  Winter  Anno  174X32.  while  he  yas 
in  his  tbird  Year  in  College.] 


%  Particglarly  under  the  Date,  Wtdnefday^^e^ti/^,  1743, 


?S*^iS^21S§fS^^SISSISS1^SS^? 


FARTj 


i^&V^lii^&i. 


22    ^/.  24.  ir^-^  LIFE  A.D.I 742: 


Part     II. 

From  ahoiit  the  T^i77te  that  he  jirjl  began  to 
devote  himfelf  mo?'e  efpecially  tothe^XM^j 
of  Divinity,  V/7/  he  ivas  exami?ied  a7id 
licenfed  to  preach,  by  the  AjJoctatio7i  of 
Mi?ttfters  belo7igi72g  to  the  Rafter 71  Dif 
triEi  of  the  Coimty  of  Fairfield  771  Con- 
nedicut. 


\\    J^^'  Bic'inerd,  the  5'pring  after  his  Expulfion,   went  to 

IT  I  ^^^'^  ^'^^  ^^'^  ^^^'*  ^^^'  ^^^''^  °^  Ripion,  to  follow  his 
^  -*-  Studies  with  him,  in  order  to  his  being  fitted  for  the 
V/crk  of  the  Miniftry  ;  where  he  fpent  the  greater  P^nt  of  the 
Time  'till  the  AfTociation  licenfed  him  to  preach  ;  but  fre- 
quently rode  to  vifu  the  neighbouring  Minifters,  particularly 
Jvlr.  Cocke  of  Stratficld^  Mr.  Grab^rn  of  Sauthbur^y  and  Air. 
Bellamy  of  Bcikkh'tm. 

Here  (at  Mr.  AJiih's)  he  began  the  third  Book  of  his  Diary, 
in  which  the  Account  he  wrote  of  himfelf,  is  as  follows.] 

1  hurfday,  ^prjl  i.  1742.  I  feem  to  be  declining  withRefpe£l 
to  my  Life  &  Warmth  in  divincTbings :  Had  not  fo  freeAccefs 
toGcd  in  Prayer,  as  ufjal  of  late.  O  that  God  would  humble 
me  deeply  in  the  Daft  before  him.  I  deferve  Hell  every  Day, 
for  not  loving  my  Lord  more,  who  has  (I  truft  )  /sved  me  and 
given  himfelf  fer  me  ;  and  every  Time  I  am  enabled  to  exercife 
anyGracc  rcnewedlyj  sm  rcnewedly  indebted  to  the  God  of  all 
Grace  for  fpecial  AfF,ft»nce.  Jf'hjre  ihea  is  Bsa/iing  ?  Surely  // 
7j  exiludtdf  when  we  think  how  we  are  dependent  on  God  for 
ihc  Being  and  every  Acl  of  Grace.  Oh, if  ever  I  get  to  Heaven, 
it  will  be  becaufe  God  will,  and  nothing  elfe  ;  fori  never  did 
any  thing  of  my  f«-if,  but  get  away  fro.m  God  !  My  Soul  will 
be  aftonifhed  at  the  unfearchable  Riches  of  divine  Grace,  when 
I  arrive  at  the  Mariilcr.s,  which  the  blcfTcd  Saviour  is  gone  be- 
fore to  prepare, 

Friday, 


•;gs/.  24*       (p/ Mr.  David  Bralnerd.     A.D.1742^   '2^ 

Friday,  j^prll  2.  In  the  Afternoon  I  felt  fomething  fweetly 
in  fecret  Prayer,  much  refigned,  calm  and  ferene.  What  are  all 
the  Storms  of  this  lower  World,  if  Jefus  by  his  Spirit  does  but 
come  walking  on  the  Seas  !  — SomeTime  paft,  I  had  much  Plea- 
fure  in  the  Profpe6l  of  the  Hsathens  being  brought  home  to 
Chrift,  and  defired  that  the  Lord  would  improve  me  in  that 
Work  : — But  now  my  5oul  more  frequently  defires  to  die,  to  he 
withChri/f,  O  that  my  5oul  were  wrapt  up  in  divineLove,  and 
my  longing  Defires  after  God  increafed,—  In  the  Evening,  was 
refre(h*d  in  Prayer,  with  the  Hopes  of  the  Advancement  of 
Chrift*s  Kingdom  in  the  World. 

Saturday,  j^prit  3,  Was  very  much  amifs  this  Morning,  and 
had  an  ill  Night  lalt  Night.  I  thought,  if  God  would  take  me 
to  himfelf  now,  my  5oul  would  exceedingly  rejoyce.  O  that  I 
may  be  always  humble  and  refign'd  to  God,  and  that  God  would 
caufe  my  5oul  to  be  more  fix'd  on  himfelf,  that  I  may  be  more 
fitted  both  for  doing  and  fufFering, 

Lords-Day,  Aprtl  4.  My  Heart  was  wandring  and  lifelefs.— - 
In  the  Evening  God  gave  me  Faith  in  Prayer,  and  made  my 
Som\  melt  in  fomeMeafure,  and  gave  me  to  tafte  a  divine  5weet- 
nefs.-—  O  my  bleflcd  God  !  Let  me  climb  up  near  to  hint, 
and  love,  and  long,  and  plead,  and  wreftle,  and  reach,  and 
ftretch  after  him,  and  for  Deliverance  from  the  Body  of  Sin  and 
Death.—  Alas,  my  .Soul  mourn'd  to  think  I  fhould  ever  lofe 
^ight  of  it's  Beloved  again  !  O  come^  Lord  Jesus  /  jimen, 

[  On  the  E'/ening  of  the  next  Day,  he  complains  that  he 
feem'd  to  be  void  of  all  Relifh  of  divineThings,  felt  much  of  ibg 
Prevalence  of  Corruption,  and  faw  in  himfelf  a  Difpofition  to 
all  Manner  cf  S\i\  ;  which  brought  a  very  great  Gloom  on  his 
Mind,  and  caft  him  down  into  the  Depths  of  Melancholy  5  fa 
that  he  fpeaks  of  himfelf,  as  aftonifhed,  amazed,  h? -ing  no 
Comfort,  being  filled  with  Horror,  feeing  no  Comfc  a  Hea- 
ven or  Earth. 

ruefday,y//>r/7  6.  I  walked  out  thisMorning  to  the  famePlace 
where  I  was  laftNight,and  felt  fomething  as  I  did  then  ;  But  was 
fomething  relieved  by  reading  fome  PaiTages  in  my  Diary,  and 
feem*d  to  feel  as  if  I  might  pray  to  the  great  God  again  with 
Freedom  ;  but  was  fuddenly  flruck  with  a  Damp,  from  tbe 
Senfe  I  had  of  my  own  Vilenefs.— -  Then  I  cry*d  to  God  to 
wafh  my  Soul  and  cleanfe  me  from  my  exceeding  Fiithinefs,  to 
give  me  Repentance  and  Pardon  ;  and  it  began  to  be  fome- 
thiiig  fvveetj  to  [^ray  :-—  And  I  could  think  0/  undergoing  the 

g^reafeft 


a?      ^t.24:  Tie  LIFfi  ^.0.1744.' 

greateft  SufFerings  in  the  Caufe  of  Chrift,  with  Pleafure  ;  and 
found  my  feU  willing  ( if  God  fhould  fo  order  it)  to  fuffcr  Ba- 
nifhment  from  my  native  Land,  among  the  Heatheriy  that  I 
might  do  fomething  for  their  Souls  Salvation j  in  Diftrefles  and 
Deaths  of  any  Kind.-—  Then  God  gave  me  to  wreftle  earneftly 
for  others,  for  the  Kingdom  of  Chrift  in  the  World,  and  for 
dear  Chriftian  Friends.  —  I  felt  wean'd  from  the  World  and 
from  my  ov^n  Reputation  amonglt  Men,  willing  to  be  defpifed, 
and  to  be  a  gazing  Stock  for  the  World  to  behold.—  'Tis  im- 
poflible  for  me  to  exprefs  how  I  then  felt  :  I  had  not  much  Joy^ 
but  fome  Senfe  of  the  Majefty  of  God,  which  made  me  as  it 
were  tremble  :  I  faw  my  felf  mean  and  vile,  which  made  me 
more  willing  that  God  fhould  do  what  he  would  with  me  s  it 
was  all  infinitely  reafonable. 

Wednefday,  Jpril  y.  I  had  not  fo  much  Fervency,  but  felt 
fomething  as  I  didYefterday- Morning, in  Prayer  : —  At  Noon  f 
fpent  fome  Time  in  fecret,  with  fome  Fervency,  but  fcarce  any 
Sweetnefs  :   And  felt  very  dull  in  the  Evening. 

Thurfday,  j^pril  8.—-  Had  raifed  Hopes  to  Day  refpe6ling 
the  Heathen,  O  that  God  would  bring  in  great  Numbers  of 'cmt 
to  Jefus  Chrift.  I  can't  but  hope  I  (hall  fee  that  glorious  Day.-- 
Every  Thing  in  this  World  feems  exceeding  vile  and  little  to 
me  :  I  look  fo  to  my  felf.— I  had  fome  littleDawn  of  Comfort  to 
Day  in  Prayer  :  But  efpecially  to  Night  I  think  I  had  fome 
Faith  and  Power  of  Interceifion  with  God,  was  enabled  to  plead 
with  God  for  the  Growth  of  Grace  in  my  felf ;  and  many  of  the 
dear  Children  of  God  then  lay  with  Weight  upon  my  Soul, 
Bkfled  be  the  Lord.     'Tis  good  to  wreftle  for  divine  Bleffings. 

Friday,  Jpril  9.  Moft  of  my  Time  in  Morning-Oevotiore 
was  fpcnt  without  fcnfible  Sweetnefs  ;  yet  I  had  one  delightful 
Profpeil  of  arriving  at  the  heavenly  World.  1  am  more  amaz'd 
than  ever  at  fuch  Thoughts  ;  for  1  fee  my  felf  infinitely  vile 
and  unworthy.  I  feel  very  heartlefs  and  dull  ;  and  tho'  1  long 
for  the  Prefence  of.  God,  and  feem  conftantly  to  reach  towards 
God  in  Defires,  yet  I  can't  feel  that  divine  and  heavenly  Sweet- 
nefs that  I  ufed  to  enjoy.-— No  poor  Creature  flands  in  Need  of 
divine  Grace  more  than  1,  and  none  abufe  it  more  than  I  have 
done,  and  ftill  do. 

Saturday,  yipril  10.  Spent  much  Time  in  fecret  Prayer  this 
Morning,  and  not  without  fome  Comfort  in  divine  Things,  and 
I  hope  had  feme  Faith  in  Exercife  :  But  am  fo  low,  and  feel  ^o 
little  of  the  fenfible  Prefence  of  God,  that  I  hardly  know  what 
to  call  Faith;  and  am  made  tp  pojjefi  tj>s  ^im  of  my  Tcuib,  and 


^/.  24.'    <?/ M-.  David  Bfairierd.    A.D.1742;    25 

the  dreadful  Sin  of  my  Nature,  and  ana  all  Sin  ;  I  can't  think, 
noradt,  but  every  Morion  is  Sin.  —  I  feel  fome  faint  Hopes, 
that  God  will,  of  his  infinite  Mercy,  return  again  withShowera 
of  converting  Grace  to  poor  Gofpel  abufing  Sinners  ;  and  my 
Hopes  of  being  improved  in  the  Caufe  of  God,  which  of  late 
have  been  almoft  extindl,  feem  now  a  little  revived.  O  that 
all  my  late  DiftrefTes  and  awful  Apprehenfions  might  prove  but 
Chrift's  School,  to  make  me  fit  for  greater  Service,  by  learning 
me  the  great  LciTon  of  Humility. 

Lord'sDay,  April  n.  In  the  Morning,  felt  but  littie  Life, 
excepting  that  myHeart  was  fomething  drawn  out  in  Thankful- 
nefs  to  God  for  his  amazing  Grace  and  Condefcenfion  to  me  in 
pafl  Influences  and  Afliftances  of  his  Spirit.  —  Afterwards  had 
ibme  Swcemefs  in  the  Thoughts  of  arriving  at  the  heavenly 
World.  O  Ifor  the  happy  Day  !—  After  publickWorfhip  God 
gave  me  fpecial  Affiflarice  in  Prayer  ;  I  wreftled  with  my  dear 
Lord,  with  much  Sweetnefs  ;  and  Interceilion  was  made  a  fwect 
and  delightful  Employment  to  me.-^ — In  the  Evening,  as  I  was 
viewing  the  Light  in  the  Norths  was  delighted  in  Contemplation 
on  the  glorious  Morning  of  the  Refurredtion. 

Monday,  April  12.  This  Morning  the  Lord  was  pleas'd  to 
lift  up  the  Light  of  his  Countenance  upon  me  in  fecret  Prayer,  and 
made  the  Seafon  very  precious  to  my  Soul.  And  tho*  I  have 
been  fo  deprefsM  of  late,  refpedting  my  Hopes  of  future  Servi^ 
ceablemfs  in  the  Caufe  of  God  ;  yet  now  I  had  much  En- 
couragement refpedling  that  Matter.  I  was  fpccially  affifted 
to  interceed  and  plead  for  poor  Souls,  and  for  the  Enlargement 
of  Chrifl's  Kingdom  in  the  World,  and  for  fpecial  Grace  foe 
my  felf,  to  fit  me  for  fpecial  Services.  I  felt  exceeding  calm, 
and  quite  refign'd  to  God,  refpedting  my  future  Improvement, 
when  and  where  he  pleafed  :  My  Faith  lifted  me  above  the 
World,  and  removed  all  thofe  Mountains,  that  I  could  not 
look  over  of  late  :  I  thought  I  wanted  not'  the  Favour  of  Man 
to  lean  upon  5  for  I  knew  Chrift's  Favour  was  infinitely  better, 
and  that  it  was  no  Matter  when^  nor  where^  nor  how  Chrilt 
fhould  fend  me,norwhat  Trials  he  fhould  (till  exercife  me  with, 
if  I  might  be  prepared  for  hisWork&Will.  I  now  found  (vr^ttXy 
revived  in  myMind  the  wonderful  Difcovcry,  of  infinite  Wifdom 
in  all  the  Difpenfations  of  God  towards  me,  which  I  had  a  lit- 
tle before  I  met  with  my  great  Trial  at  College  :  every  Thing 
appeared  full  of  the  IVifdom  of  God. 

Tuefday,  April  13.  Saw  my  felf  to  be  very  mean  and  vile  5 
pondered  at  thof«  th^it  ftt^wed  me  Kefpf dt.    Afterwards  wat 

S  f«m«* 


26    JEt.  24:        ne  L I  F  E  A:  D:  1 742^ 

fomething  comforted  in  fecret  Retircmcnf,  and  was  aflifted  to 
wreftle  with  God,  with  romc  Power,  Spirituality  and  Sweetnefs. 
"DlefTed  be  the  Lord,  he  is  never  unmindful  of  me,  but  always 
fends  me  needed  Supplies,  and  from  Time  to  Time,  when  I 
am  like  one  dead,  raifes  me  to  Life.  O  that  I  may  never 
diftruft  infinite  Goodnefs. 

Wednefday,  Jpril  14.  My  Soul  longed  for  Communion  with 
Chrift,  and  for  the  Mortification  of  indwelling  Corruption,  ef- 
pecially  fpiritual  Pride.  O  there  is  a  fweetDay  coming,  wherein 
the  weary  will  be  at  Refl,  My  Soul  has  enjoyed  muchSweetnefs 
this  Day  in  the  Hopes  of  its  fpeedy  arrival. 

Thurfday,  April  15.  My  Defires  apparently  centered  in 
God,  and  I  found  a  fenfible  Attraftion  of  Soul  after  him,  fun- 
dry  Times  to  Day  :  I  know  I  long  for  GOD,  and  a  Conformity 
to  bis  Will,  in  inward  Purity  and  Holinefs,  tenThoufandTimcs 
more  than  for  any  Thing  here  below. 

Friday  &  Saturday,  Jpril  16,  17.  Seldom  prayed  without 
fome  fenfible  Sweetnefs  and  Joy  in  the  Lord.  Sometimes  I 
longed  much  to  be  dljfahed  and  to  be  with  Chrijf,  O  that  God- 
would  enable  me  to  grow  in  Grace  every  Day.  Alas,  my  Bar- 
lennefs  is  fuch,  that  God  might  well  fay.  Cut  it  down.  —  I  am 
afraid  of  a  dead  Heart  on  the  Sabbath  now  begun  :  O  that  God 
would  quicken  me  by  his  Grace. 

Lord's-Day  Jpril  18.  Retir'd  early  this  Morning  into  the 
Woods  for  Prayer ;  had  the  Afliftance  of  God's  Spirit,  and 
Faith  in  Exercife,  and  was  enabled  to  plead  with  Fervency  for 
the  Advancement  of  Chrift's  Kingdom  in  the  World,  and  to 
interceed  for  dear  abfent  Friends.  —  At  Noon,  God  enabled 
me  to  wreftle  with  him,  and  to  feel  (as  I  trufl)  the  Power  of 
divine  Love  in  Prayer.  ---  At  Night,  faw  my  felf  infinitely  in- 
debted to  God,  and  had  a  View  of  my  Short- comings :  It 
feem'd  to  me,  that  I  had  done  as  it  were  nothing  for  God,  and 
that  I  never  had  lived  to  him  but  a  few  Hours  of  my  Life. 

Monday,  Jprii  19.  I  fet  apart  this  Day  for  Failing  &  Prayer 
to  God  for  his  Grace,  efpecially  to  prepare  me  for  the  Work  of 
the  A//77//?ry,  to  give  me  divine  Aid  and  Direction  in  myPrepa- 
rations  for  that  great  Work,  and  in  his  own  Time  to  fend  me 
into  his  Harve/i.  Accordingly,  in  the  Morning,  endeavoured 
to  plead  for  the  divine  Prefence  for  the  Day,  and  not  without 
feme  Life.  In  the  Forenoon,  I  felt  a  Power  of  InterceiTion  for 
precicus  immortal  Souls,  for  the  Advancement  of  the  Kingdom 
of  my  dear  Lord  and  Saviour  in  the  World  ;  and  withal,  a  moft 
fwect  Rcfignation,  and  even  Confolalion  and  Joy  in  (he  Tho'ts 

cf 


3lt.2,5'      o/JWr.  David  Brainerd.    A.D.174*.     a  7 

of  fuffering  Hardfhips,  Diftreffes,  and  even  Death  it  felf.  in  the 
Promotion  of  it;  and  had  fpecial  Enhrgemeut  m  plcadmg  for 
the  Enlightningand  Converfion  of  the  poor  Be^lheT,.  In  the 
Afternoon,  God  «><•>  wM  ""  0/ a  Truth.  O  'twas  bleffcd 
Company  indeed  !  God  enabled  me  fo  to  ^'6°"'", '"  J"^"* 
.hat  I  was  quite  wet  with  Sweat,  tho'  m  the  Shade,  and  he 
Wind  cool.  My  Soul  was  drawn  out  very  much  for  thelVorld , 
I  grafp'd  for  MuUitud,.  of  Souls.  I  think  I  had  7r<:  EnUrge- 
ment'for  Sinners,tha„  for  the  Children  of  God  ,  'h°  Jit  -  . 
I  could  fpend  my  Life  in  Cr.es  for  both.  I  •^''J^l'^^  g^"| 
Sweetnefs  in  Communion  with  my  dear  Saviour.  I  'hmk  I 
never  in  my  Life  felt  fuch  an  mt.re  Weanedneft  from  th^ 
World,  and  fo  much  ref.gn'd  noGod  '"  f  7J  Th.ng. --- O 
that!  may  always  live  /».  and  upon  my  blelTed  God.  Amen, 

^Tuefday,  Jpril  10.  This  Day  I  am  twenty- four  Years  of 
Age.  O  how  much  Mercy  have  I  received  the  Year  paft  !  -- 
How  often  has  God  caufid  his  Goodnefs  to  ff  before  me  !  And 
how  poorly  have  I  anfwered  theVows  I  made  thisT.me  twelve- 
month,  to  be  wholly /A^£»r^\  to  be  forever  devoted  to  his 
Service  !  The  Lord  help  me  to  live  niore  to  his  Glory  forTime 
to  come.—  This  has  been  a  fweet,  a  happy  Day  to  me  :  Blefled 
.  be  God.  I  think,  my  Soul  was  never  fo  drawa  out  in  Inter- 
ceffion  for  other,,  as  it  has  been  this  Night.  Had  a  moft  fer- 
vent Wreftle  with  the  Lord  to  Night  for  ^yE>""""-'^fJ 
hardly  ever  fo  longed  to  live  to  God,  and  to  be^'toaether  de- 
voted to  him ;  I  wanted  to  wear  out  my  Life  in  his  Service  and 

w'ednefday,  April  21.  Felt  much  Calninefsand  Refignation, 
and  God  again  enabled  me  to  wreftle  for  Numbers  of  Souls  and 
had  much  Fervency  in  the  fweet  Duty  of  Interceffion.  —  I  en- 
iov  of  late  more  Sweetnefs  in  htercejjion  for  others,  than  m  anr 
other  Part  of  Prayer.  My  blefled  Lord  really  let  me  come  near 
to  him,  and  plead  with  him. 

FThe  Frame  of  Mind,  and  Exercifes  of  Soul,  that  be  exj 
preVes  the  three  Days  next  following,  Thurfday,  Fnd.y  and 
Saturday,  are  much  of  the  fame  Kind  with  thofe  expre.s  d  the 
two  Days  paft.] 

Lord's- Day  April  i^.  This  Morning  fpent  about  two  Hours 
in  fecret  Duties,  and  was  enabled  more  than  ordinarily  to  ago- 
nize for  immortal  Souls  i  tho'  it  was  early  in  the  Morning.and 

E  a  the 


^2g    ^/.  25;         T^^  LIFE  A.  D.  1742:    ^ 

the  Sun  fcarcely  fhlncd  at  all,  yet  my  Body  was  quite  wet  with 
Sweat.  Felt  much  prefs'd  now,  as  frequently  of  late,  to  plead 
for  the  Meeknefs  and  Calmnefs  of  the  Lamb  of  God  in  mySoul : 
Thro'  divine  Goodnefs  felt  much  of  it  this  Morning.  O  'tis 
a  fweet  Difpofition,  heartily  to  forgive  all  Injuries  done  us  ;  to 
wi(h  our  greateft  Enemies  as  well  as  we  do  our  own  Souls  ! 
Blefledjefus,  may  I  daily  be  more  and  more  conformed  to  Thee. 
At  Night  was  exceedingly  melted  with  divine  Love,  and  had 
fome  feeling  Senfe  of  the  BlefTednefs  of  the  upper  World. 
Thofe  Words  hung  upon  me,with  much  divine  Sweetnefs,Pfal. 
Ixxxiv.  7.  They  go  f ram  Strength  to  Strength^  every  one  of  them  in 
Zion  appear 6th  before  God.  O  the  near  Accefs^  that  God  forae- 
times  gives  us  in  our  Addreflcs  to  him  !  This  may  well  be 
termed  appearing  before  God  :  *Tis  fo  mdeed,in  the  true  fpiritua! 

Senfe,  and  in  the  fweeteft  Senfe. 1  think  I  have  not  had  fuch 

Power  of  Interceffion,  thefe  many  Months,  both  for  God'$ 
Children,  and  for  dead  Sinners,  as  I  have  had  this  Evening. 
I  wifhed  and  longed  for  the  Coming  of  my  dear  Lord  :  I  long'd  to 
join  the  Angelick  Hofts  in  Praifes,  wholly  free  from  Imper- 
fesSlion.  O  the  blefTed  Moment  haftens  !  All  I  want  is  to  be 
more  holy,  more  like  my  dear  Lord.  O  for  Sandtification  ! 
My  very  Soul  pant?  for  the  compleat  Reftoratioq  of  the  blefTed 
Image  of  my  fweet  Saviour  ;  that  I  may  be  fit  for  the  blefTed 
Enjoyments  and  Employments  of  the  heavenly  World. 

Farewell^    vain  World  ;    my  Soul  can  hid  Mieu  : 
JHy  Saviour'j   taught  me    to  abandon  you* 
Tour  Charms  may  gratify  a  fenfual  Mind  ; 
Islot  pleafe  a  Soul  wholly  for  God   deftgh'd. 
Forbear  t^ entice,    ceafe  then  my  Soul  to   call : 
*Tis  fix^d,  through  Grace  ;   my  God  flM  he  my  All* 
JVhile   he  thus    lets  me  heavenly  Glories  view^ 
Tour  Beauties  fade,    my   Hearths  no  Room  for  you. 

The  Lord  refrefl:ied  my  Soul  with  many  fweet  FaiTages  of 
his  Word.  O  the  New  Jerufalem  I  My  Soul  longed  for  it. 
Q  the  Song  of  Mofei  and  the  Lamb  !  And  that  blefled  Song, 
that  no  Man  can  learn,  but  ihey  that  are  redeemed  from  the 
Martb  I  And  the  glorious  white  RoheSy  tha^  were  given  to  the 
Souls  under  ths  Altar  J 

Lord,  Vm  a  Stranger  here  alone  ; 
Earth  no  true    Comforts  ccn  afford  ; 
Xit,  cbjent  from  my  deareji  One^ 
My    Soul   delights  io  cry^    Mv  Lord  ! 


[/Et^  25^      of  Mr.  David  Brainerd;     A.D.  1742.    25 

Jesus,  wy  Lord^  my  only  Loviy 
Fojfefs  my  Soul,  nor  thence  depart : 
Grant  me  kind  F'tfits^   heavenly  Dove  ; 
My  God  Jhall  then  have  all  my  Heart, 

Monday,  April  26.  Continued  in  a  fweet  Frame  of  IVIInd  ; 
but  in  the  Afternoon  felt  fomethtng  of  fpiritual  Pride  ftirring, 
God  was  pleafed  to  make  it  a  humbling  Seafon  at  firft  ;  tho* 
afterwards  he  gave  me  Sweetnefs.  O  my  Soul  exceedingly 
longs  for  that  blefled  State  of  Perfe<Slion  of  Deliverance  from 
all  Sin  !— At  Night,  God  enabled  me  to  give  my  Soul  up  to 
him,  tocaft  my  felf  upon  him,  to  be  ordered  and  difpofed  of 
according  to  his  fovereign  PJeafure  ;  and  I  enjoyed  great  Peace 
andConfolation  in  fo  doing.  My  Soul  took  fwectDelight  in  God 
to  Night :  My  Thoughts  freely  and  fweetly  centred  in  him.  O 
that  1  could  fpend  every  Moment  of  my  Life  to  his  Glory. 

T\it(dzy^  April  27.  Retir'd  pretty  early  for  fecretDevotions  ; 
and  in  Prayer  God  was  pleafed  to  pour  fuch  ineffable  Comforts 
into  my  Soul,  that  I  couW  do  nothing  for  fome  Time  but  fay 
over  and  over,  O  my  fweet  Saviour  !  O  my  fweet  Saviour  f 
Whom  hav-e  lin  Heaven y  but  Thee  f  and  there  it  none  upon  Earthy 
that  Idefire  beftde  Thee,  If  I  had  had  a  Thoufand  Lives,  my  Soul 
would  gladly  have  laid  *em  all  down  at  once  to  have  been  with 
Christ.  My  Soul  never  enjoyed  fo  much  of  Heaven  before  ; 
'twas  the  moft  refined  and  mofl  fpiritual  Seafon  of  Communion 
with  God  I  ever  yet  felt :  I  never  felt  fo  great  a  Degree  of 
Refignation  in  my  Life  :  I  felt  very  fweetly  all  the  Forenoon. — 
In  the  Afternoon  I  withdrew  to  meet  with  my  God,  but  found 
my  felf  much  declined,  and  God  made  it  a  humbling  Seafon 
to  my  Soul :  I  mourned  over  the  Body  of  Deaths  that  is  in 
me  :  it  grieved  me  exceedingly,  that  I  could  not  pray  to 
and  praife  God  with  my  Heart  full  of  divine  heavenly  Love.— 
O  that  my  ScJul  might  never  offer  any  dead  cold  Services  to  my 
Cgod.—  In  the  Evening  had  not  fo  much  fweet  divine  Love,  as 
in  the  Morning  ;  but  had  a  fweet  Seafon  of  fervent  Interceffion. 

Wednefday,  April  28.  Withdrew  to  my  ufual  Place  of  Re- 
tirement in  great  Peace  and  Tranquillity,  and  fpent  about  two 
Hours  in  fecretDuties.  I  felt  much  as  I  didYefterday-Morning, 
only  weaker  and  more  overcome.  I  fecmed  to  hang  and  depend 
wholly  on  my  dearLord  ;  wholly  wean'd  from  all  otherDepen- 
dances.  I  knew  not  what  to  fay  to  myGod,but  only  lean  on  his 
Bojom,  as  it  were,  &  breathe  out  my Defircs  after  a  perfeftCon- 
formity  to  him  in  allThings.  ThirftingDefues&infatiableLong- 

ings 


§0    Mt.  25:  T/&^  L I  F  E  A.D.  1 742; 

ings  pofTefled  my  Soul, after  perfcdlHolinefs :  God  was  (o  preci- 
ous to  my  Soul,  that  the  World  with  all  its  Enjoyments  was  in- 
finitely vile  :  I  had  no  more  Value  for  the  Favour  of  Men,  thaa 
for  Pebbles :  The  Lord  was  my  All  ;  and  He  over-ruled  all  ; 
which  greatly  delighted  me.  I  think,  my  Faith  and  Depen- 
dance  on  God  fcarce  ever  rofe  fo  high.  I  law  Him  fuch  aFoun- 
tain  of  Goodnefs,  that  it  feem'd  impoiTible  I  Ihould  diftrufl  him 
again,  or  be  any  Way  anxious  about  any  Thing  that  fhould 
happen  to  me.  I  now  enjoyed  great  Sweetnefs  in  praying  for 
abfent  Friends,  and  for  the  Enlargement  of  Chrifl's  Kingdom 
in  the  World.— Much  of  the  Power  of  thefe  divine  Enjoyments 
remained  with  me  thro*  the  Day. —  In  the  Evening  my  Heart 
feem*d  fwcetly  to  melt,&I  truft,was  really  humbled  for  indwel- 
ling Corruption,  and  I  mourned  like  a  Dove,  I  felt  that  alLmy 
Unhappinefs  arofe  from  my  being  a  Sinner  ;  for  withRefignation 
I  could  bid  Welcome  all  other  Trials  ;  but  Sin  hung  heavy 
upon  me  ;  for  God  difcovered  to  me  the  Corruption  of  my 
Heart :  fo  that  I  went  to  Bed  with  a  heavy  Heart,  becaufc  I 
was  a  Sinner  ;  tho'  I  did  not  in  the  leaft  doubt  of  God's  Love* 
O  that  God  would  purge  away  my  Drofs^  and  take  away  my  Tin, 
and  make  me  feven  Times  refined. 

Thurfday,y^/>r//  29.  Was  kept  oiFat  aDiflance  from  God  j  — 
but  had  fome  Inlargement  in  Interccifion  for  precious  Souls. 

Friday,  Jprii  30.  Was  fomething  dejedled  in  Spirit  :  No- 
thing grieves  me  fo  much,  as  that  1  cannot  live  conftantly  to 
God's  Glory.  I  could  bear  any  Defertlon  or  fpiritual  Conflicts, 
if  I  could  but  have  my  Heart  all  the  while  burning  within  me 
with  Love  to  God  and  Defires  of  his  Glory  :  But  this  is  im- 
pofTible  ;  for  when  I  feel  thefe,  I  can't  be  dejeded  in  my  Soul, 
hu\oi\\y  rejoycein  my  Saviour^  who  has  delivered  me  from  the 
reigningPower,  and  will  fhortly  deliver  me  from  the  Indwelling 
of  Sin, 

Saturday,  May  i.  Was  enabled  to  cry  toGod  withFervency 
for  miniftcrial  Qualifications,  and  that  God  would  appear  for 
the  Advancement  of  his  own  Kingdom,  and  that  he  would 
bring  in  the  Heathen  World,  &c.  Had  much  Afliftance  in  my 
Studies.— This  has  been  a  profitable  Week  to  me  ;  I  have  en- 
joyed many  Communicatiojis  of  the  blefled  Spirit  in  my  Soul. 

Lord's-Day,  May  2.  God  was  pleafed  this  Morning  to  give 
mc  fuch  a  Sight  of  my  felf,  as  made  me  appear  very  vile  in  my 
own  Eyes  :  I  fell  Corruption  ftirring  in  myHeart, which  I  could 
by  no  Means  fupprefs  :  felt  more  and  more  deferted  ;  was  ex* 
ceeding  weak,  and  almoft  fick  with  my  inward  Trials. 

Monda^v, 


;a?/.  25;     ^f  ^^'  ^^^'^  Brainerd.     A.D.  1 742:       3 i 

Monday,  Ma^  3.  Had  a  Scnfc  of  vile  Ingratitude.  la  the 
Momine  I  withdrew  to  my  ufual  Place  of  Retirement,  and 
mourned  for  my  Abufe  of  my  dear  Lord  :  fpent  the  Day  in 
Faftine  and  Prayer  :  God  gave  me  much  Power  of  wreftling 
for  his  Caufc  and  Kingdom  :  And  it  was  a  happy  Day  to  my 
Soul.  God  was  with  me  all  the  Day,  and  I  was  more  above 
the  World,  than  ever  in  my  Life. 

rThrough  the  remaining  Part  of  this  Week,  he  compteina 
almoft  every  Day  of  Defertion  and  inward  Trials  and  Confliets, 
attended  with  dejeaion  of  Spirit ;  but  yet  fpcaks  of  Timefe  of 
Relief  and  Sweetnefs,  and  daily  rcfrcfhing  Vifits  of  the  divmc 
Soirit  afFording  fpecial  AfTiftanceandComfort,  and  enabling,  at 
fome  Times,  to  much  Fervency  and  Enlargement  m  religioua 
Duties.] 

Lord's-Day,  ^ay  9.  I  think,  I  never  felt  fo  much  of  the 
curfed  Pride  of  my  Heart,  as  well  as  the  Stubbornnefs  of  my 
Will  before.  Oh  dreadful  !  what  a  vile  Wretch  I  am  !  I 
could  not  fubmit  to  be  nothing,  and  to  lie  down  in  the  Duft  J 
Oh  that  God  would  humble  me  in  the  Duft.  I  felt  my  felt 
fuch  a  Sinner,  all  Day,  that  I  had  fcarce  any  Comfort.  Oh, 
when  ftiall  I  be  delivered  from  the  Body  of  this  Death  !  I  greatly 
fcar'd  left  thro'  Stupidity  and  .Carelcfnefs  I  (hould  lofe  the 
Benefit  of  thefe  Trials.  O  that  they  might  be  fana.fied  to 
Riy  Soul.  Nothing  feemed  to  touch  me  but  only  this,  that  I 
was  a  Sinner.  -—  Had  Fervency  and   Refrefhment  in  fecial 

Prayer  in  the  Evening.  r     r       r-x.  n- 

Monday,  May  lO.  Rode  to  iV^w-ii^z/^"  ;  WW  fomeLhriltian 
Friends  there  ;  hadComfort  in  joining  inPrayer  with  them,and 
hearing  of  the  Goodnefs  of  God  to  them  fmce  I  laft  law  them. 

Tuefday,  May  n.  Rode  Uom  New- Haven  toWeathers field -, 
was  very  dull  moft  of  the  Day  ;  bad  little  Spirituality  in  this 
Journey,  iho'  I  often  longed  to  be  alone  with  God  ;  was  much 
perplex'd  with  vile  Thoughts  ;  was  fometimes  afraid  of  every 
Thing  :  But  God  was  my  Helper,-'  Calch'd  a  little  Tifne_ foe 
Retirement  in  the  Evening,  to  mv  Comfort  and  Rejoycing, 
Alas,  I  can't  live  in  the  midft  of  a  Tumult !    I  long  to  enjoy 

God  alone.  ^^.         r    .     r.  -j 

Wedncfday,  Maf  12.  Had  a  dlftreiling  View  of  the  Pnde 
and  Enmity  and  Vilenefs  of  my  Heart.—  Afterwards  had  fwcec 
Refrefhment  in  converfmg,  k  worihipoing  God,  wuhChnftian 

Thurlday> 


^2      JSt.  2s:         ^^LIFE  A. D.  174a 

Thursday,  A<lay  13.  Saw  fo  much  of  the  Wickednefs  of  my 
Heart,  that  I  longed  to  get  away  from  my  felf.  1  never  before 
thought,  there  was  (o  much  fpiritual  Pride  in  my  Soul  :  I  felt 
almoft  prefs'd  to  Death  with  my  own  Vilencfs.  Oh,  what  a 
Body  of  Death  is  there  in  me  !  Lordy  deliver  my  Soul.  I  could 
not  find  any  convenient  Place  for  Retirement,  and  was  greatly 
cxercifed.— -Rode  to  Hartford  in  the  Afternoon  :  had  fomeRe- 
frefhment  and  Comfort  in  religious  Exercifes  with  Chriftian 
Friends  ;  but  longed  for  moreRetireraent.  O  the  clofeft  Walk 
with  God  is  the  fweeteftHeaven,that  can  be  enjoy'd  on  Earth  ! 

Friday,  May  14.  Waited  on  a  Council  of  Minifters  con- 
vened at  Hartford,  and  fpread  bfifore  them  the  Treatment  I  had 
met  with  from  the  Redlor  and  Tutors  of  Tale-College  ;  who 
thought  it  advifeable  to  interceed  for  me  with  the  Reaor  and 
Truftees,  and  to  intreat  them  to  reftore  me  to  my  former  Pri- 
vileges in  College,  f  — -  After  this,  fpent  fome  Time  in  reli- 
gious Exercifes  with  Chrifiian  Friends. 

Saturday,  May  15.  Rode  from  Hartford  to  Hebron  ;  was 
fomething  dejedled  on  the  Road  ;  appeared  exceeding  vile  in 
my  own  Eyes,  faw  much  Pride  and  Stubbornnefs  in  my  Heart. 
Indeed  I  never  faw  fuch  a  Week  before;  as  this  ;  for  I  have 
been  almoft  ready  to  die  with  the  View  of  the  Wickednefs  of 
my  Heart.  I  could  not  have  thought  I  had  fuch  a  Body  of  Death 
in  me.     Oh  that  God  would  deliver  my  Soul, 

[The  three  next  Days  (which  he  fpent  at  Hebron,  Lebanon^ 
and  Norwich)  he  complains  fiill  of  Dulncfs  and  Defertion,  and 
exprelTes  a  Scnfe  of  his  Vilenefs,  and  longing  to  hide  himfelf  in 
fome  Cave  or  Den  of  the  Earth  :  But  yet  fpeaks  of  fome  Inter- 
vals of  Comfort  and  Soul-Refrefhmeni  each  Day.] 

Wednefday,  A;ay  ic),  [At  AftUhgton']  I  was  fo  amazingly 
defertcd  this  iMcrning,  that  I  feem'd  to  feel  a  Sort  of  Horror 
in  my  Soul.  Aias,  when  God  withdraws, what  is  there  that  can 
afford  any  Comfort  to  the  Soul  I 

[Through  the  eight  Days  next  following,  he  exprefTes  more 
Calmnefs  ar)d  Ctmtort,  and  confiderable  Life,  Fervency  and 
Sweeinefs  in  Religion.] 


•f-  The  Application  which  was  then  m^de  on  his  Behalf,  had 
not  the  c'cfired  Succtfs. 

Friday, 


JEt.  2^,     (p/ M*.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.1742,    23 

Friday,  May  28.  [At  New-Havtn]  I  think,  I  fcarce  ever  felt 
fo  calm  in  my  Life  ;  I  rejoyced  in  Refignation,  and  giving 
my  felf  up  to  God,  to  be  wholly  and  intirely  devoted  to  hin\ 
forever. 

[On  the  three  following  Days,  there  was,  by  the  Account 
lie  gives,  a  Continuance  of  the  fame  excellent  Frame  uf  Mind, 
laft  exprefled  :  But  it  feems  not  to  be  altogether  to  fo  great 
a  Degree.] 

Tuefday,  June  i.  Had  much  of  the  Prefence  of  God  ia 
Faraily-Prayer,and  had  fopie  Comfort  in  Secret.  I  was  greatly 
refrefhed  from  the  Word  of  God,  thisMorning,  which  appeared 
exceeding  fweet  to  me  :  feme  Things  that  appeared  myfterious, 
were  opened  to  me.  O  that  the  Kingdom  of  the  dear  Saviour 
might  come  with  Power  ^  and  the  healing  Waters  of  the  San£fuarf 
fpread  far  and  wide  for  the  Healing  of  the  Nations.  —  Came  to 
Ripton  ;  but  was  very  weak  :  However,  being  vifited  by  a 
Number  of  young  People  in  the  Evening,  I  pray'd  with  thera. 

[The  remaining  Part  of  this  Week,  he  fpeaks  of  being  much 
diverted  and  hindered  in  the  Bufinefs  of  Religion,  by  great 
Weaknefs  of  Body,  and  neceffary  Affairs,  that  he  had  to  at- 
tend, and  complains  of  having  but  little  Power  in  Religion  5 
But  fignifies,  that  God  hereby  {hewed  him.  He  was  like  a  help- 
lefs  Infant  cafl  out  in  the  open  Field.] 

Lord's-Day,  June  6.—  I  feel  much  deferted  :  But  all  this 
leaches  me  my  Nothingnefs  and  Vilenefs  more  than  ever. 

Monday,  June  7.  Felt  ftill  powerlcfs  in  fecret  Prayer.— 
Afterwards  I  pray 'd, and  converfed,  with  fome  little  Life.  God 
feeds  me  with  Crumbs  :  BlefTed  be  his  Name  for  any  Thing. 
I  felt  a  great  Defire,  that  all  God's  People  might  know  how 
mean  and  little  and  vile  I  am  5  that  they  might  fee  I  am  nothing, 
that  fo  they  may  pray  for  me  aright,  and  not  have  the  leaft 
Dependance  upon  me. 

Tuefday,  June  8.  I  enjoyed  one  fweet  and  precious  Seafon 
this  Day  :  I  never  felt  it  fo  fweet  to  be  nothing,  and  lefs  than 
nothing,   and  to  be  accounted  nothing. 

[The  three  next  Days  he  complains  of  Defertion,  and  Want 
of  tcrvency  in  Religion  ;  but  yet  his  Diary  {hews  that  every 
Day  his  Heart  was  engaged  in  Rfligion,  as  his  great  and  as  it 
were  gnJy  Bufm^fs.] 

F  Saturday, 


34      -^/.2:5:  ira^   L I F  E  A.D.  1742; 

Saturday,  June  12.  Spent  much  Time  in  Prayer,  thisMorn- 
ing,  and  enjoyed  much  Sweetnefs  :  —  Felt  infatiable  Longings 
after  God,  much  of  the  Day  :  1  wonder'd  how  poor  Souls  do 
to  hve,  that  have  no  God.-"  The  World,  with  all  its  Enjcy- 
UienJs,  quite  vanifhcd.  I  fee  my  itM  very  helplefs  :  but  I  have 
a  blefled  God,  to  go  to.  I  long'd  exceedingly  to  he  dlffolvcd^ 
and  to  be  ivith  Chri/i,  to  behold  his  Glory.  Oh,  my  weak  weary 
Soul  iongs  to  airive  at  my  Father's  Houje  ! 

Lord's- Day,  June  13.  Felt  fomething  calm  and*  refigneJ  in 
the  publick  Worfhip  :  At  the  Sacrament  faw  my  felf  very  vile 
and  worthlefs.  O  that  I  may  always  lie  low  in  the  Duft.  My 
Soul  feemed  fleadily  to  go  foi-th  after  GOD,  in  longing  Defircs 
to  live  upon  him. 

Monday,   Juneif^,  Felt  fomething  of  the  Sweetrrefs  of  Com- 
munion with  God,    and  the  conftraining   Force  of  hh   Love  : 
How  admirably  it  captivates  the  Soul,  and  makes  all  the  Defirss 
and  AfFcitjons  to  center  m  God  !  —  I  {^i  apart  this  Day  for  fe- 
cret  Failing  and  Prayer,  to  intreat  G^fo  direa   and   hlefs  me 
with  Regard  to  the  great  Work  1  have  in  View,    of  Preaching 
the  Gojpel  -,   and  that  the  Lord  would  return  to  me  and  /hew  me 
the  Light  of  his  Countenance,     Had  little  Life  and  Power  in   the 
Porenoon  :  Near  the  middle  of  theAfternoon,  God  enabled  rae 
to  wreflle  ardently  in  IntercefTion  for  abfent  Friends:— But  juft 
at  Night,  the  Lord  vifited  memarvclloufly  in  Prayer  ;  I  think, 
ifny  Soul  never  was  in  fuch  anAgony  before;  I  fcltnoReftrainf: ; 
for  the  Treafures  of  divineGrace  were  opened  ta  me  :  I  wreftled 
for  abfent  Friends,  for  the  Ingathering  of  Souls,   for  Multitudes 
of  poor  Souls,   and  for  many  that  I  thought  were  the  Children 
of  God,   perf^na'ly,  in  many  diftant  Places.     I  was  in  fuch  an 
Agony,  from  Sun  half  an  Hour  high,  ''till  near  Dark,  that  I  was 
all  over  wet  with  Swear  ;   but  yet  it  feem*d  to  me  that  I  had 
wafted  away  the  D:^y,   and  had  done  nothing.     Oh,    my  dear 
Jesus  didy^.'^^  Blood (qv  poor  Souls  !  f  long  for  more   Com- 
pailion  towards  them..-  Felt  ftiU  in  a  fweet  Frame,    under  a 
fienfe  0/  divine  Love  and  Grace';  and  went  to  Bed  in  fuch  a 
JFrame,  with  my  Heart  fet  on  God. 

Tucfday,  June  15,  Had  the  moft  ardent  Longings  after 
OoD,  that  ever  I  felt  in  ray  Life  :  At  Noon,  in  my  fecret  Re- 
tirement, I  could  do  nothing  but  tell  my  dear  Lord,  ia  a  fweet 
Calm,  that  he  knew  I  longed  for  nothing  ^ut  Himfelf,  nothing 
but  liolinejs  ;  That  He  had  given  me  ihefe  Dcfires,  and  He 
i»«/k  could  give  me  the  Thing  defired.  I  never  feem'd  to  be  (o 
«lihi/]g(?d  fropi  my  {^\f^  and  to  be  fg  whollj'  devoted  to  God. 

My 


Mt.  25;    of  Mr.  David  Brainerd.    A.D.  1 742;    35 

My  Heart  was  fwallowed  up  in  Gop,  moft  of  the  Day.  In  the 
Evening  I  had  fuch  a  View  of  iheSoul's  being  as  it  were  enlarged, 
loconiain  more  Holincfs,  that  my  Soul  fcem'd  ready  to  fcparate 
frcm  my  Body,  and  ftretch  to  obtain  it.  I  tl-^en  wreftled  in  an 
Agony  for  divine  Bleffings ;  had  my  Heart  drawn  out  in  Prayer 
for  fomeCiiriftian  Friends,  beyond  what  I  ever  had  before.--- r 
feel  dilFerentiy  now  from  what  ever  I  did  under  any  fweet  En- 
joyments before,  more  engaged  to  live  to  GOD  for  ever,  and 
Je(s  plealed  with  my  own  Frames  :  I  am  not  larfsfied  with  my 
Frames,  nor  feel  at  all  mor?  eafv  affer  fuch  fweet  Str-.gghngs 
than  before  ;  for  it  feems  far  too  little,  if  1  cnuld  always  be  fo. 
Qh,  how  (hort  do  i  fall  of  my  Duty  in  my  fweeteft  Moments ! 

[In  fels  Diary  for  the  two  next  Days,  he  exprefics  fomething 
of  the  fame  Frame,  but  in  a  fat  lefe  Degree.  *] 

Friday,  June  18.  Confidering  my  great  Unfitnefs  for  the 
Work  of  the  Minijlry,  mv  prefent  Deadnefs,  and  total  Inabilit>' 
io  do  any  Thins  for  the  Glory  of  God  thatWay,  feeling  my  felf 
very  helplefs,  and  at  a  great  Lofs  what  ihi  Lord  would  have  me 
in  do,  I  iet  apart  this  Day  for  Prayer  to  God,  and  fpcnt  mofl 
of  the  Day  in  that  Duty  ;  but  amazingly  deferred,  mofl  of  the 
Day  :  yet  I  found  God  gracioully  near,  once  in  particuhr, 
while  I  was  pleading  for  more  Companion  for  immortal  Souls, 
my  Heart  feem'd  to  be  open'd  at  once,  and  I  was  enabled  ro  cry 
with  great  Ardency,  for  a  itsff  Minutes. --Oh,  f  was  diftrefs'd, 
to  think,  that  i  fhould  offer  fuch  dead  cold  Services  to  ihc  living 
God!  My  Soul  feem-d  to  breathe  after  Holinefs,  a  Life  of 
conftant  Devotednefs  to  God.  But  I  am  almoft  loft  f  metimes 
In  the  puifuit  of  this  BiefTednefs,  and  re^^dy  to  fink,  becaufe  I 
continually  fall  fliort  and  mife  of  my  Defire.  O  that  the  Lord 
would  help  me  to  hold  out,  yet  a  iittk  while,  'tili  the  happy 
Hour  of  Deliverance  corner, 

Saturday,  June  19.  Felt  much  difordered  ;  my  Spirits  were? 
very  low  :  but  yet  enjoyed  feme  Freedom  and  bwse!:ners  in  the 
Puties  of  Religion.     Blefied  bs  God, 


Here  end  the  ?o  firfl  Pages  of  the  third  \'clume  of  his 
Diary,  which  h^e  fpeaks  of  in  the  Beginning  of  this  Volume 
(as  was  obferved  before)  as  containir.g  a  Specimen  of  his 
ordinary  Manner  of  living,  thro'  the  vvhole  Space  of  Time, 
ffom  ibe^eginning  of  ihofe  two  Volumes  i\m  ^eredeftroyM. 
'     ^        ^  f  2  Lord's- 


'36     jEL2S.  ^i^^  life  A.D.  Y742: 

LordVDay,  June  20.  ^pent  much  Time  alone.— My  Soul 
longed  to  be  holy,  and  reached  after  God  ;  but  feemM  not  to 
obtain  my  Dcfirc  :  I  hundred  and  ihirjied  ;  but  was  not  fwcetly 
refrefh'd  and  fatisfied.  My  Sou\  hung  on  God,  as  my  only 
Portion.  O  that  I  could  grow  in  Grace  more  abundantly 
every  Day.  *  ' 

[The  nextDay  he  fpeaks  of  his  havingAiTiftance  in  his^tudies. 
and  Power,  Fervency  and  Comfort  in  Prayer.] 

^  Tuefday,  June  22.  In  the  Morning,  fpcnt  about  twoHours 
'"  ^[^>'7,^"^  ^/^^f^'i^"'  withconfiderable  Delight.  Towards 
Night,  felt  my  Soul  go  out  in  longing  Defires  after  God,  in  fe- 
cret  Retirement.  In  the  Evening,  was  fweetly  compofed  and 
rehgned  to  God^sWill ;  was  enabled  to  leave  my  felf  and  all  my 
Concerns  with  Hrni,  and  to  have  my  whole  Dependance  upon 
Him  :  my  fecret  Retirement  was  very  refrefliing  to  my  Soul  • 
3t  appeared  fuch  a  Happinefs  to  have  God  for  my  Portion,  that  I 
had  rather  be  any  other  Creature  in  this  lower  Creation,  than 
not  come  to  the  Enjovment  of  God  :  I  had  rather  be  a  Bead 
than  a  Man,  without  God,  if  I  were  to  live  here  to  Eternity. 
Lord,  endear  thy  k\i  more  to  me. 

[In  his  Diary  for  the  next  feven  Days,  he  exprefTes  a  variety 
of  Exerc.fesof  Mind  :  He  fpeaks  of  great  Longings  after  God 
and  Holinefo,  and  earnest  Defires  for  the  Co»verfion  of  others, 
of  fervency  in  Prayer,  and  Power  to  wreftle  with  God,  and  of 
Compofare,  Comfort  and  ^weetntfs,  from  Time  to  Time  ; 
but  exprefles  a  Senfe  of  the  vile  Abomination  of  his  Heart,  and 
bitterly  comphinscHii^Barrenners,  and  the  preiTmg  Body  of 
Death  ;  and  fays,  he  /aw  dearly,  that  whatever  he  enjoyed 
better  than  Hell,  was  free  Grace  :  Compluins  of  his  being  ex- 
ceeding low,  much  below  the  Character  of  a  Child  of  God  • 
and  is  fometimes  \tTy  difconfojate  and  dcjeaed.J  ' 

^  Wednefday,  >^,  30.  Spent  this  Day  alone  in  the  Woods, 
Bn  l^alting  and  Prayer  5  underwent  the  moft  dreadful  ConHias 
jn  my  Soul,  that  ever  I  felt,  in  feme  Refpeds  :  I  faw  w.y  kU  fo 
vile  that  I  was  ready  to  fay,  1  Jhallnow  pcrijh  by  the  Hand  of 
taul..— I  thought,  and  almofl  concluded,  I  had  no  Power  to 
itand  for  the  Caufe  of  God,  but  v^2S  7i]nio{^  afraid  0/ the JJjaking 
6f  a  Leaf.  Spent  almoft  the  whole  Day  in  Prayer,  inceffantly. 
I  cou.d  fiot  bt^ar  :o  u^irJc  of  Chfi^ians  ihswing  me  any  Refped. 


^/.  25.       of  Mr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.1742.    37 

I  almoft  defpalred  of  doing  any  Service  in  the  World  :  I  could 
not  feel  anyHope  or  Comfort,refpeaing  i\\tHeathm,\N\{\c\\  ufed 
to  aftord  me  fome  Refrefhment  in  the  darkeft  Hours  of  this  Na- 
ture. 1  fpent  away  the  Day  in  the  ^itternefs  of  my  .^ouL  Near 
Night,  I  felt  a  little  better  3  and  afterwards  enjoyed  fome  Sweet- 
nefs  in  fecret  Prayer. 

Thurfday,  ^uly  I.  Had  fomeSweetnefs  in  Prayer,  this  Morn- 
ing. —  Felt  exceeding  fweetly  in  fecretPrayer  toNight,&  defircd 
nothing  (o  ardently  as  that  God/houlddo  with  meju/i  as  hepleafed. 
Friday,  July  2.  Felt  compofed  in  fecret  Prayer, in  the  Morn- 
ing.— My  Defires  fweetly  afcended  to  God  this  Day,  as  I  was 
travelling  :  and  was  comfortable  in  the  Evening.  Blefled  be 
God  for  all  my  Confolations. 

Saturday,  July  3.  My  Heart  feemed  again  to  link.  TheDif- 
grace  I  was  laid  under  at  College,  feemed  to  damp  me,  as  it  opens 
the  Mouths  of  Oppofers.  I  had  no  Refuge  but  in  God  only. 
Blefled  be  his  Name,  that  I  may  go  to  Him  at  all  Times,  and 
find  him  zprefent  Help. 

Lord's-Day,  ^uh  4..  Had  confiderable  AfHftance.  In  theE- 
vening,  I  withdrew  and  enjoyed  a  happy  Seafon  in  fecretPrayer : 
God  was  pleafed  to  give  me  the  Exercife  of  Faith,  and  thereby 
brought  the  invifible  and  eternal  World  near  to  my  Soul  ;  which 
appeared  fweetly  to  me.  I  hoped,  that  my  weary  Pilgrimage  in 
the  World  would  be  Jhorty  and  that  it  would  not  be  long  before 
I  was  brought  to  my  heavenly  Home  and  Father'sHoufe  :  I  was 
fweetly  refigned  to'God's  Will,  to  tarry  his  Time,  to  do  his 
Work,  and  fuffer  his  Pleafure.  I  felt  Thankfulnefs  to  God  for 
all  my  preiTing  Defer tions^oi  late  ;  for  I  am  perfwaded,  they 
have  been  made  a  Means  of  making  me  more  humble, and  much 
more  refioin'd.  I  felt  pleafed,  to  be  little,  to  be  nothing,  and  to 
lie  in  the  Duji.  I  enjoyM  Life  and  fwect  Confolation  in  plead- 
ing for  the  dear  Children  of  God,  and  the  Kingdom  of  Chrift 
in  the  World  :  and  my  Soul  earneftly  breathed  aftcrHolinefs  and 
the  Enjoyment  of  God.  0  come  Lord  Jesus  /  Come  quickly. 
Allien, 

[  By  his  Diary  for  the  remaining  Days  of  thisWeek,it  appears 
that  he  enjoyed  confiderable  Corapofure  and  Tranquillity,  and 
had  Sweetnefs  and  Fervency  of  Spirit  in  Prayer,  from  Day  to 
Day.] 

Lords-Day,  July  11.  Was  deferted  and  exceeding  dejefted  m 
the  Morning.—  In  theAfternoon,  had  fome  Life  and.  Afliftance, 
aud  fslt  refigned  :  I  faw  my  felf  6;sceedir>g  vile. 


3 ^      J^t.  IS.  ne  hlYE  A.D. 1 742 : 

[On  the  two  next  Days  he  cxpre^Tes  inward  Comfort,  K.efig- 
Tiation,  and  Strength  in  God.] 

Wednerday,7«//>'  14.  Felt  a  Kind  of  humble  refigned  Sweet- 
tit^i  :  Spent  a  confiderable  Time  in  Secret,  giving  my  felf  up 
wholly  to  cheLord.—  Heard  Mr.  Bellamy  preach, towardsNight : 
felt  very  Sweetly,  part  of  the  Time  :  Longed  for  never  accf/s  U 
!GoD. 

[The  four  next  Days,  he  exprefTes  confiderable  Comfort  and 
Fervency  of  Spirit  in  ChriftianConverfation  and  Religious  Exer- 
cifes.] 

Monday,  July  19.  My  Dcfires  feem  efpecially  to  be  carried 
out  after  Weaned nefs  from  the  fVorld^  perfeiSlDeadnefs  to  it,and 
Co  be  even  crucified  to  all  its  Allurements.  My  Soul  longs  to  feel 
it  felf  more  of  a  Pilgrim  and  Stranger  here  below  5  that  nothtng 
ftiay  divert  me  from  prefiing  through  the  lonely  Dcfart,  'till! 
arrive  at  my  Father's  floufe. 

Tuefday,  July  20.  It  was  fweet,to  give  away  my  felf  toGoD, 
to  bedifpofed  of  at  his  PJeafure  ;  and  had  fome  feeling  Senfe  of 
tiie  Sweetnefs  of  being  a  Pilgrim  on  Earth. 

[The  nextDayjhe  cxprefles  himfelf  as  determined  to  be  wholly 
devoted  to  Gcd  ;  and  it  appears  by  his  Diary,  that  he  fpent  the 
whole  Day  in  a  moft  diligent  Exercife  oi  Religion,  and  exceed*- 
ing  comfortably.] 

Thurfday,  July  22.  Journeying  from  Souihbury  to  Ripton, 
called  at  aHoufe  by  theWay, where  being  very  kindly  entertained 
and  refrefh'd,  I  was  fiil'd  wiih  Amazement  and  Shame,  tha£ 
God  fhould  Itir  up  the  Hearts  of  any  to  fnew  (o  much  Kindnefs 
to  fuch  a  dead  Dog  as  I  ;  was  made  fenfible,  .in  fome  Meafure, 
Ijow  exceeding  vile  it  is,  not  to  be  wkol!y  devoted  to  God.  I 
wonder'd,  that  God  would  fufFcr  any  of  his  Creatures  to  feed  and 
fuftain  me,  from  Time  to  Time. 

[  In  his  Diary  for  the. fix  next  Days,  are  exprefied  various 
Exercifes  and  Experiences,  fuch  as  fvveet  Compofure  and  Fer- 
veRcy  of  Spirit  in  Mediiaiion  afid  Prayer,  V/eanednefs  from  the 
World,  being  fenfibly  a  Pilgrim  and  Stranger  on  the  Earth, 
Engagednefs  of  Mind  to  fpend  every  Inch  of  Time  forGodyi^c.'j 

Thurfday,  July^  2p.  Was  examined  by  the  Aflbciation  meC 
at  Danhur^^zs  to  my  f^earning,  and  alfomy  Experiences  in  Re- 
Jigicn,  and  received  a  Licence  from  them  to  preach  the  Gofpel 
of  Chrift.---  Afterwards  felt  much  devoted  to  God  ;  join'd  in 
Prayer  with  one  of  the  Miniiters,  my  peculiar  Friend,  in  a 
convenient  PUces  wcat  to  Bed  rcfolving  to  liv^  devoted  toGod 
fill  wy  Davj;, 

PART] 


y£/.  25;      of  Mr.  David    Bralnerd.      A  D.  1742:     39 


Part     IIL 

M  From  theTme  of  his  being  licenfed  to  preachy 
by  the  AfTociation,  'till  he  was  examined 
in  New- York,  by  the  Correfpondents  or 
^CommiJJioners  of  the  Society  in  Scotland 
for  propagating  Chriflian  Knowledge^ 
and  approved  a7td  appoi?tted  as  their 
Miffionary  to  the  Indians. 

FRiday,  July  30.  1742.  Rode  from  Danbury  to  Souihhury^  i 
Preach'd  there  from  iP^/.iv.  8.  Had  much  of  the  comfor- 
table Prefence  of  God  in  the  Exercife  :  1  feem'd  to  have 
Power  withGod  in  Prayer,  and  Power  to  get  hold  of  the  Hearts 
of  the  People  in  Preaching. 

Saturday,  July  31.  Exceeding  calm  and  compofed,  and  was 
greatly  refrefhed  and  encouraged. 

[  It  appears  by  his  Diary,  that  he  continued  in  this  Siveetnefs 
and  Tranquillity,  almoft  through  the  whole  of  the  next  VVeek,  j 

LordVDay,  Jug.  8.  In  the  Morning  felt  comfortably  in  fe- 
cret  Prayer  ;  my  Soul  was  refrefh'u  with  the  Hopes  of  the  Hea- 
ihem  coming  home  to  Chrift  -,  was  much  refigned  to  God,  i 
thought  it  was  no  Matter  what  became  of  me.  —  Preach'd  boih 
Parts  of  the  Day  at  Bethlehem^  from  Job  xiv.  14.  It  was  fvveet  to 
me  to  meditate  on  Death.  In  the  Evening,  felt  very  ccmforu- 
bly,  and  cried  to  God  fervently,  in  fecret  Prayer. 

[  It  appears  by  his  Diary,  that  he  continued  thro'  the  three 
nextDays,  engaged  with  all  his  Might  in  the  Bufinefs  of  Religi- 
ooj  and  in  almoft  a  conilant  Enjoyment  of  the  Comforts  of  iz.'\ 

Thurfday 


40    Mt,  25.  T??^  LIFE  A.D.I 742: 

Thuifday,  Augufi  12.  This  Morning  and  laft  Night  was  ex- 
crcifed  with  fore  inward  Trials  :  I  had  no  Power  to  pray  ;  but 
feemed  fhut  out  from  God.  I  had  in  a  great  Meafure  loft  my 
Hopes  ot  God's  fending  me  among  the  Heathen  afar  off,  and 
of  feeing  them  fl  jck  home  to  Chrift.  I  faw  fo  much  of  my  hellifh 
Vilenefs,  that  f  appear'd  worfe  to  my  felf,  than  any  Devil :  I 
wondered,  that  God  would  \t\  me  live,  and  wondered  that  Peo- 
ple did  not  ftone  me,  much  more,  that  they  would  ever  hear  mc-j^ 
preach  !  Jt  fecm'd  as  tho'  I  never  could  nor  fliould  preach  any^ 
more,  yet  about  9  or  10  o'Clock,  the  People  came  over,  and  I 
was  forced  to  pi  each  :  And  blefled  be  God,  he  gave  me  his  Pre- 
fenceand  Spirit  in  Prayer  and  Preaching  :  5o  that  I  was  much 
aflifted,  and  fpake  v;ith  Power  from  Jobidv.  14.  5ome  Ind^am 
cry'd  out  in  great  Diftrefs,  *  and  all  appear'd  greatly  concerned. 
After  we  had  pray'd  and  exhorted  them  to  feek  the  Lord  with 
Conftancy,  and  hired  an  Englijh  Woman  to  keep  a  Kind  of 
5f)5?c5/ among  them,  we  came  away  about  one  o'Clock, and  came 
to  yW^ff, about  15  or  16  Miles.  There  God  was  pleafed  to  vifit 
my  5oul  with  n}uch  Comfort.  Bleffed  be  the  Lord  for  allThings 
I  meet  with,  . 

[  It  appears,  that  the  two  next  Days  he  had  muph  Comfort, 
and  had  his  Heart  much  engaged  in  Religion.] 

Lords-Day,  Auguft  13.  Felt  much  Comfort  and  Devotednefs 
to  God  this  Day.  At  Night,  it  was  refrefliing,  to  get  alone  with 
Gop  and  pur  cut  my  SouL  O,  who  can  conceive  of  the  Sweet- 
nefs  of  Con)munion  with  the  blefled  God,  but  thofe  that  have 
Experience  of  it  !  Glory  to  God  forever,  that  I  may  tafte  Hea- 
ven below. 

Monday,  Aaguji  16.  Had  feme  Comfort  in  fecret  Prayer,  in 
the  Morning  :--  Feltfweetly  fundry  Times  in  Prayer  this  Day": 
But  was  much  perplexed  in  the  Evening  with  vain  Converfaiion. 

TuefJay,  Au^v/i  ly.  Exceedingly  deprefs'd  in  Spirit.  It  cuts 
and  wounds  my  Heart,  to  think  how  much  Se'f- Exaltation, Spi- 
ritual  Pride.tiUannth  cf  Temper, \  hzvt  formerly  had  interming- 
led with  my  Endeavours  to  promote  God's  Work  :  And  fomc- 
times  I  long  to  lie  down  at  the  Feetof  OppoferSjand  confcfs  what 
a  poor   imperfciSl  Creature  i  have  been  and  ftill  am.--  Oh,  the 


*  It  was  in  a  Place  near  Kent,  in  the  Weflern  Borders  of  Con- 

nciiuut,  wbeie  there  is  a  ^wn^^i ^ihdiAr.u 


£t,  25.     (?/ A/r.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.1742.     41 

Lord  forgive  me,  and  make  me  for  the  future  wife  as  a  Serpent 
and  harmiefi  ai  a  /)^u^.-- Afterwards  enjoy 'd  confiderable  Com- 
fort and  Delight  of  Soul. 

Wednefday,  Aw^uji  18.  Spent  moil  of  this  Day  m  Prayer  and 
Readmg.—  I  fee  fo  much  ot  my  own  extream  Vilenefs,  that  1 
feel  afliamed  and  euilty  before  God  and  Man  :  I  look,  to  my 
felf,  like  the  vileft  Fellow  in  the  Land  :  I  wonder,  that  God  ftirs 
up  his  People  to  be  fo  kind  to  me. 
Ji.  Thurfday,  Augu/i  19.  This  Day,  being  about  to  go  frora 
Mr.  Bellamy's  at  Beihuhem,  where  I  had  refided  fome  Time, 
pravM  with  him,  and  two  or  three  other  Chriftian  Friends,  and 
gave  our  felves  to  God  with  all  our  Hearts,  to  be  his  for  ever : 
Eternity  look'd  very  near  to  me,  while  I  was  praying.  If^  I 
never  (h  >uld  fee  thefe  Chrif^ians  again  in  this  World,  it  feemM 
but  a  fewMomcnts  before  I  fhould  meet 'em  in  another VVoild.- 
Parted  with  them  fweetly.  /  ,r   .      t  u     n 

Friday,  Augu^  20.  I  appeared  fo  vile  to  my  felf,that  I  hardly 
dared  to  think  of  being  feen,  efpecially  en  Account  of  fpiriiual 
Pride.  However,  to  Night,  1  enjoyed  a  fweet  Hour  alone  with 
God  [at  Ripton]  I  was  lifted  above  the  Frowns  and  Flatteries  oi 
this  lower  World,  had  a  fweet  Relifti  of  heavenly  Joys,  and  piy 
Soul  did  as  it  were  get  into  the  eternal  World,  and  really  tafte 
of  Heaven.  I  had  a  fweet  Seafon  of  IntercefTion  for  deai Friends 
^  in  Chrifl  ;  andGod  helped  me  to  cry  fervently  for  Zion,  BltlTed 
be  God  for  this  Seafon.  */f      • 

Saturdav,  Augu/i  ti.  Was  much  perplex'd,intheMorniiig." 
Towards  Noon  enjoyed  more  of  God  in  fecrct,  was  enabled  to 
fee  that  it  was  beft  to  throw  my  felf  into  the  Hands  of  God,  to 
bedifpd'edof  according  to  his  Pleafure,  and  rejoyced  in  fuch 
Thoughts.  In  the  Afternoon, rode  to  New-Haven  ;  was  much 
confufed  all  the  Way.— Juft  at  Night,  underwent  fuch  a  dread- 
ful Confl.a,  as  I  have  fcarcc  ever  fell.  I  faw  my  kM  exceed- 
ing vile  and  unworthy  ;  fo  that  I  was  guilty,  and  afhamed,  that 
any  Body  (hould  beftow  any  Favour  on  me,  or  (hew  me  any 
R^rpea.  *  ^^     .  .      .   _.,, 

LordVDay,  Augufl  22.  In  the  Morning,  continued  ft.li 
in  Perplexity.—  In  the  Evening,  enjoyed  that  Comfort  that 
feemM  to  me  fufHcicnt  to  ovcr-ballance  all  my  late  Diitrelics. 
I  faw,  that  God  is  the  only  Soul-faiisfying  Portion,  and  I  really 
foQnd  .saiisfaaion  m  him  :  My  Soul  was  much  enlarged  in 
fweet  Interccffion  tor  my  Feliow-Men  every  where,  and  lor 
m^ny  Chrittun  Friends,  in  particular,  in  diftant  Fiaces. 

'  G  Monday, 


42     JEt.2s.  T/^^LIFE  A.D.1742; 

Monday,  y^uguji  13.  Ha^  a  fweet  Seafon  in  fecret  Prayer  : 
The  Lord  drew  near  to  my  Soul,  and  filled  me  with  Peace  and 
divine  Confulation.  O,  my  Soul  tafted  the  Sweetnefs  of  the 
upper  World  ;  and  was  fweetly  drawn  out  in  Prayer  for  the 
World, that  it  mio^ht  come  home  toChrift  I  Had  much  Comfort 
in  the  Thoughts  and  Hopes  of  the  Ingathering  of  the  Heathen  5 
was  grciuly  alTifted  in  InterceiTion  for  Chriftian  Friends. 

[He  cojitinued  ftijl  in  the  fame  Frame  of  Mind  the  next  Day,- 
but  in  a  leiTer  Degree.] 

Wednefday,  Augufi  25.  In  Family-Prayer,  God  helped  me 
to  climb  up  wear  Him,  fo  that  I  fcarce  ever  got  nearer. 

[The  four  next  Days,  he  appears  to  have  been  the  Subje<fl 
of  Dcfertion,  and  of  Comfort  and  Fervency^ in  Religion jinter- 
changeably,  together  with  a  Senfc  of  Vilenefs  and  Unprofita- 
blenefsj 

Monday,  Juau/i  30.  Felt  fomething  comfortably  in  the 
Morning  ;  converfed  fweetly  with  fome  Friends  ;  was  in  a  fe- 
rious  compofed  Frania  ;  pray'd  at  a  certain  Houfe  with  fome 
Degree  of  Sweetnefs,  Afterwards,  at  another  Houfe,  pray'd 
privately  with  a  dear  Chriftian  Friend  or  two  ;  and  I  think,  I 
fcarce  ever  launcb'd  fo  far  into  the  eteri^l  World,  as  then  ;  I 
got  f.i  far  out  on  the  broad  Ocean,  that  my  Soul  with  Joy  tri- 
umphed over  all  the  Evils  on  the  Shores  of  Mortality.  I  think, 
Turn  and  all  its  ga/  Amufements  and  cruel  Difappointments, 
never  appeared  ^0  inconliderable  to  me  before  :  I  was  in  a  i'^e^i 
Frame  5  i  faw  nr/  felf  nothing,  and  my  Soul  reach'd  after 
God  with  intenfe  Oefire.  O  !  I  faw  what  I  owed  to  God,  in 
futh  a  Manner,  as  {  fcarce  ever  did  :  {  knew,  I  had  never  lived 
a  Momeijt  to  him,  as  I  flioulJ  do  :  In-decd  it  appeared  to  me,  I 
had  never  done  any  Thing  inCbrlrtianity  :  My  Soul  longed  with 
8  vehement  Dclirc  to  live  ia  GOD. ---In  the  Evening,  fung  and 
pray'd  with  a  Number  of  Chriftians  :  Feit  the  Pcwers  of  the 
Wo^  d  to  come,  in  my  Soul,  in  Prayer.  Afterwards  pray'd  again 
])fivatcfy,  with  a  dp-v  Ch-iilian  or  two,  and  found  the  Prefence 
oT  God  ;  was  fomcihing  humbled  in  my  fecret  Renrement  ; 
ft;  1 1  my  In;^;.:fitL;u'e,  bccaufe  I  was  not  vvholjy  fwailowed  up  in 
God, 

[i  Ic  w.i-  j;i  4  i  .vcet  Frame  great  Part  of  the  next  Day.] 

Wednesday, 


JEi.2^,     r/ Mr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.1742.       43 

Wcdr^fday,  Septemh.  i.  —  Went  to  Judea^  to  the  Ordina- 
ticjn  ol:  Mr.  Judd.  Dear  Mr.  Bellamy  preach'd  from  Maah. 
xxiv.  46.  Bleffed  is  that  Sgrvant  &c.  I  telt  very  folemn,  and 
very  i'weetly,  moft  of  the  Time  ;  had  my  Tnoug,hts  mucli  on 
thzitTimQ  when  our  Lord  will  come ;  that  Time  lefrefhcd  my 
Soul  much  ;  only  I  was  afraid,  1  (hould  not  be  iouvA  faithful y 
becaufe  I  have  fo  vile  a  Heart.  My  llioughts  were  much  in 
Eternity,  where  I  love  to  dwell.  Bleffed  be  God  for  this  fo- 
^lemn'Seafon.--- Rode  home  to  Night  with  Mr.  Bellamy  \  felt 
fomething  fweetly  on  the  Road  ;  converfed  with  fome  Friends 
'till  it  was  \Qiy  late,  aivd  then  retired  to  Reft  in  a  ccmfortable 
Frame. 

Thurfday,  September  2.  About  two  in  the  Afterncon,  1 
preach'd  from  John  vi.  67.  And  God  aflifted  me  in  feme  com- 
fortable Degree  ;  but  more  efpeciajly  in  my  firft  Prcyer  j  my 
Soul  feemed  then  to  launch  quite  into  the  eternal  WoilJ,  and 
to  be  as  it  were  feparated  from  this  lower  World.--  Afterwards 
preached  again  from  Jfaiah  v.  4.  God  gave  me  fome  Affiliancci 
But  I  faw  my  felf  a  poor  Worm. 

[  On  Friday,  September  3.  He  complains  of  having  but  little 
Lite  in  the  Things  of  God,  the  former  Pare  of  the  Day,  but  af- 
terwards fpeaks  of  Sweetnefs  an^  Fnlargem-ent.] 

Saturday,  September  4.  Much  out  of  Health,  and  exceedingly 
deprefb'd  in  my  Soul^aud  was  at  an  awful  Diftancefrom  God.--- 
Towards  Night,  fpent  fome  Time  in  pVolirable  Thoughts  on 
Rom.  viii.  2.—  Near  Night,  had  a  very  fweet  Seafon  in  Prayer  ; 
God  enabled  me  to  w^reftie  ardently  for  the  Advancement  of  the 
Redeemer's  Kingdom  ;  pleaded  earneftly  for  my  ov/n  <lear  Bro- 
ther'/o^w,  that  God  would  nvike  him  more  of  a  Pilgrim  and 
Stranger  on  iheEarth,  and  fit  him  for  lingular  Serviceablerefs  in 
the  World  ;  and  my  Heart  (^t?:\\y  exulted  m  ihe  Lord,  in  the 
71ioughts  of  anyDiftreiles  that  might  alight  on  him  or  me,in  (he 
Advancement  of  Chrift's  Kingdom.  —  *Twas  a  fweet  and  com- 
fortablt  Hour  unto  my  Soul,  while  I  was  indulged  Freedom  to 
plead,  not  onlv  for  my  felf,  but  for  many' other  Souls. 

LordVDay,  S.^ptemher  5.    Preach'd  all  Day  :  was  fomeihin^^ 

ftrengthen'd  &  afiilied  in  the  Afternoon;  more  efpedally  in  the 

Evening:  had  a  Senfc  of  my  unfncikable    Short-comings  m  all 

my  Duties.     1  found;  alas !    thai  I  had  never  lived  to  God  ni 

my  Life.  ,  ^  ^     , 

G  2  Monaay, 


44     ^t.  25.        5^^^  LIFE  A.  D.  1742. 

Monday,  Septrmb.  6.  Was  informed,  that  they  only  waited 
for  an  Opportunity  to  apprehend  me  for  Preaching  at  New- Hc^ 
ven  lately,  that  (o  they  might  imprifon  me  :  This  made  me  more 
folemn  and  ferious,  and  to  quit  all  Hopes  of  the  World's 
Kriendfhip:  It  brought  mc  to  a  further  Senfe  of  my  Vilenefs, 
and  ju(t  Defcrt  of  this,  and  much  more,  from  the  Hand  of  God, 
tho'  not  from  the  Hand  of  Man  :  Retired  into  a  convenient  Place 
in  the  Woods,  and  fpread  the  Matter  before  God. 

Tuefday,  Septemb.  7.  Had  fome  Reliih  of  divine  Things  in 
the  Morning.  Afterwards  felt  more  barren  and  melancholy. 
Kode  to  NewHaveTiyto  a  Friend's  Houfe  at  a  Diftance  from  the 
Town  ;  that  I  remain  undifcovered,  and  yet  have  Opportunity 
to  do  Bufmefs  privately  with  Friends,  which  come  to  Com- 
tnencsment, 

Wedncfday,  Septemb,  8.  Felt  very  fweetly,  when  I  firft  rofe 
in  the  Morning.  In  Family- Prayer,  had  fome  Enlafgement,but 
not  much  Spirituality,  'till  Eternity  came  up  before  me  and  look'd 
near  ;  I  found  fume  Swectnefs  in  theThoughts  of  bidding  a  dying 
Farewell  to  this  tircfom  World  :  Tho'  fomctime  ago  I  reckon'd 
upon  feeing  my  dear  Friends  at  Commencement^  yet  being  now 
denied  the  Opportunity,  for  fear  of  Imprifbnment,  I  felt  totally 
rcfign'd,  and  as  contented  to  fpend  this  Day  alone  in  the  Woods, 
as  I  could  have  done,  if  I  had  been  allowed  to  go  to  Town.  Felt 
exceedingly  wean'd  from  the  World  to  Day.—  In  the  A/teinoon 
difcourfed  fometbing  on  fome  divineThings  with  a  dearChriftian 
Friend,  whereby  we  were  both  refrefhed.  Then  I  pray'd, 
with  a  fweet  Senfe  of  the  BlefTednefs  of  Communion  with  God  ; 
I  think,  I  fcarceevcr  enjoyed  more  of  God  in  any  one  Prayer, 
O  it  was  a  blelTed  Seafon  indeed  to  my  Soul  !  I  knew  not  that 
ever  I  faw  fo  much  of  my  own  Nothingnefs  in  my  Life  ;  never 
wondered  fo,  that  God  allowed  me  to  preach  his  Word  ;  never 
was  fo  aftonifhed  as  now.— This  has  been  a  fweet  and  comforta- 
ble Day  to  my  Soul  :  BlefTed  be  God.—  Pray'd  again  with  my 
dear  Friend,  with  fomething  of  the  divine  Prefence.—  I  long  to 
be  wholly  conformed  to  God,  and  transformed  intp  his  Image. 

Tburfday,  5^;)/^wA.  Q.  Spent  lyiuch  of  the  Day  alone":  En^ 
joyed  the  Prefence  of  Cjod  in  fome  comfortable  Degree  :  was 
vifited  by  fome  dear  Friends,  and  pray'd  with  them  :  Wrote 
fundry  Letters  to  Friends  ;  felt  Religion  in  my  Soul  while  writ- 
ing: Enjoyed  fome  fweet  Meditations  on  fome  Scriptures.—  In 
the  Evenmg,  went  very  privately  into  Town,  from  the  Place  of 
myRefidence  at  theFarms,and  converfed  with  fome  dearFriends  5 
^It  fwectly  in  fingmg  Hymns  wi:h  !hein  i  and  made  my  Efcape 


JEt.  25.       <ff  Mr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D  1 742.     45 

to  the  Farms  again,  without  being  difcovered  by  anv  Enemies, 
as  I  knew  of.     Thus  the  Lord  preferves  me  connnualy. 

Friday,  Septmber  10.  Longed  with  inttnfe  Dcfire  after  God  t 
mv  whole  Soul  fcemM  impatient  to  be  Conformed  to   h.m,  and 
to  become  Holy,  as  he  is  Holy.--  In  the  Afternoon    prav  d  wtth 
a  dear  Friend  privately,  and  had  the  Prefence  of  God  with  us  ; 
our  Souls  united  together  to  reach  after  a  bltfTed  Immortaluv,  to 
be   unclothed  of  the   Body  of  Sin  and  De.th,   and    to   enter  the 
blefTed   World,  where  n^  unclean  Thing  enters.     O,    with  what 
intenfe  Defire  did  our  Souls  long  for  that  blefTed  Diy,   that  we 
might  be  freed  from  Sin,    and  forever  live  to  and  in  our  God  !- 
In  the  EveHing,took  leave  of  thatHoufe  ;    But  hrtt  knee,  d  down 
and  prayed  5    The  Lord  was  of  a  Truth  in  the  mdji  of  us  -    twas  a 
fweet  parting  Seafon  ;  felt  in  my  felf  much  Sweetnefs  and  Affec- 
tion in  theThings  of  God.     BlefTed  be  God  for  every  f.ch  d.v.ns 
Gale  of  his  Spirit,  to  fpeed  me  on  in  my  W  ay  to  the  New  Jeru- 
fatem  '"-  Felt  fome  Sweetnefs  afterwards,  and  fpent  ihehvemng 
in  Converfation  with   Friends,  and  prayM  with  fume  Life,  and 
retired  to  Reft  very  late. 

[The  five  next  Days^he  appears  to  have  been  in  an  exceeding 
comfortable,  fweet  Frame  of  Mind,  for  the  mofl  Part,  and 
to  have  been  the  Subjca  of  the  like  heavenly  Exercires  as  are 
often  exprelTed  in  preceeding  PafTages  «f  his  Diary  ;  fuch  as  hav- 
inghis  Heart  much  engaged  for  God,  w^eltliog  with  God  la 
Prayer  with  Power  andArdency,enjaying  aiT-mes,  f^veet  «^ahn- 
nefs  and  Compofure  of  Mind,  giving  himfelf  up  to  God  to  be  his 
forever,  with  great  Complacence  of  Mind,  being  wholly  rcfi-ned 
to  theWill  of  God, that  God  might  do  with  h.m  what  he  pkafed, 
loncring  well  to  improve  Time,  having  the  eternal  World  as  it 
Wer^'e  brought  nigh,  longing  after  God  and  Holinefs  earneflly 
defiring  a  compleat  Conformity  to  him,  and  wondring  how  poor 
Souls  do  to  exift  without  God.] 

Thurfday,  September  16.  At  Night,  felt  exceeding  fweetJy  : 
Enjoyed  much  of  God  in  fecretPraver  :  Felt  an  uncomm  .nRcfig- 
natior,  to  A^and  ^^whatGod  pleafed.  SomeDays  paf^,  I  itU great 
Perplexity  ^n  Account  of  my  pafl  Condud  :  My  Bittemef^  and 
Want  of  Chriflian  Kindnefs  andLove,has  been  very  dijlreffing  to 
my  Soul :  The  Lord  forgive  me  my  umhrij'iianff'armth.md  want 
of  a  Spirit  of  Meeknefs. 

[Th5 


46    JEt.  25.  ne  LIFE  A,  D. 


742. 


[The  next  Day,  He  fpeaks  of  much  Refignation,  Calmncfs 
and  Peace  of  Muid,  and  near  Views  of  the  cLernai  World.  J 

Saturday,  Septemb,  48.  Felt  fonie  CompaiTion  for  Souls,  and 
mourn'd  I  had  no  more.  I  i^^l  much  more  Kindnefs,  Meek- 
nefs,  Gcntlcnefs  and  Love  towards  all  Mankind,  than  ever.  I 
Jong  to  be  at  theFeet  of  my  Enemies  and  Perfecutors .  Enjoyed 
fonie  Sweetncfs,  in  feeling  my  Soul  conform'd  to  Chri/i  7efuSy 
and  given  ^way  to  him  forever,  in  Prayer  to  Day. 

[  The  next  Day,  hexfpeaks  of  much  Dejeflion  and  Difcou- 
ngement,  from  an  Apprehenfion  of  his  own  Unfitnefsever  to  do 
^ny  Good  in  Preachmg  ;  But  biefTes  God  for  all  D.fpenfations  of 
Providence  andGrace ;  finding  that  by  all  God  wean'd  him  more 
from  the  World,  and  made  him  more  refign'd. 

The  next  ten  Days,  he  appears  to  have  been  for  the  moft  Part 
under  great  Degrees  of  Melancholy,  exceedingly  dejeaed  and 
difcouraged  ;  fpeaks  of  his  being  ready  to  give  up  ail  for  gone 
refpeamg  the  Caufe  of  Chrif},  and  exceedingly  longing  to 
die  :  Yet  h  ad  fome  fweet  Seafons  and  Intervals  of  Comfort,  and 
fpecial  Affiftance  and  Enlargement  in  the  Duties  of  Religion, 
and  m  performing  publick  Servicer,  and  coofiderable  Succds  m 
them.  ] 

Thurfday,  September  ^0.  Still  very  low  in  Spirits,  and  did  not 
know  how  10  engage  in  anv  Woik  or  Bufinefs,  efpecially  to  cor^ 
rea  fome  Di for  den  among  Cbrifliam  ;  felt  as  tho'  I  had  noPower 
to  be  faithful  in  that  Regard.  However  towards  Noon,  preach'd 
from  Deut.  viii.  2.  And  wa5  enabled  with  Freedom  to  reprove 
fom^  Fhingi  in  Chriftians  Condua,  that  I  thought  very  unfuica- 
ble  and  incgular  ;  inlKted  near  two  Hours  on  this  Subjea. 

[  Throii-h  this,  and  th^  two  fojlowing  Weeks,  he  pa/Ted 
through  a  Variety  of  Exerciics :  He  was  frequently  dejeaed,and 
felt  jn  ward  JJ^.il.efres  ;  and  fomctimes  funk  into  the  depths  of 
Mcj.uich.>!y  :  At  which  Turns,  he  was  not  exercifed  about  the 
btare  of  his  Soul,  with  Regard  to  the  Favour  of  God  and  his  In- 
tereft  in  Chnlt,  but  about  his  own  linfui  Infirmities,  and  unfitnefs 
for  God'b  Service.  His  Mind  appears  rametimcs  extrcmdv  de- 
prefb'd  and  funk  wilh  a  Senfe  of  mcxpreliible  Vilenefs.  But  in 
the  mean  Time,he  fpeaks  of  n.any  ^^afcns  of  Comfort  and  fpiri- 
tua,  Rc'rahmcnr,  wherein  hisHcart  was  encouraged  andftrength- 
ned  in  G  :d,    and  r.vcetly  rcTigncd  to  his    VV1II3  and  of   fome 

Seafons 


'^Z.  25.      <>/ Mr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.   1742.    47 

Seafons  of  very  high  Degrees  of  fpiritual  Confolation,  and  of  his 
great  Longings  after  Holinefs  and  Conformity  to  God,  of  his 
great  Fear  ot  offending  God, of  hisHeart*s  being  fweetly  melted 
in  religiousDuties,of  his  longing  for  tbe-AdvancemenC  of  Chrift's 
Kingdom,  and  of  his  having  at  fome  Times  much  Affiftance  in 
Preaching,  and  of  remarkable  Effects  on  the  Auditory.  J 

Lords-Day,  OSiob^  17.  Had  a  confiderable  Senfeof  my  Help- 
lefnefe  and  Inability  ;  faw  that  I  muft  be  dependent  on  God  for 
all  I  want ;  and  eipecialiy  when  I  went  to  the  Place  of  publiclc 
Worfhip  :  I  found  I  could  not  fpeak  a  Word  for  God  without 
his  fpecial  Help  and  AlTifhnce  :  I  went  into  the  Aflembly  trem- 
bling, as  I  frequently  do,  under  a  Senfe  of  my  Infuificiency  to 
do  any  Thing  in  the  Caufe  of  God,  as  I  ought  todo.— -  But  it 
pleafed  God  to  afford  me  rrkuchAfliftance,  and  there  feemM  to  be 
a  confiderable  Effect  aw  the  Hearers.---  Jn  the  Evening,  I  felt  a 
Difpofition  to  praife  God  for  his  Goodnefs  to  me,  in  fpecial, that 
he  had  enabled  me  in  fome  Meafure  to  be  faithful  j  and  my  Soul 
rejoyced  to  think,  that  1  had  thug  performed  the  Work  of  one 
Day  more,  and  was  oneDay  nearer  my  eternal, and  (I  truft  )  my 
heavenly  Home.  O  that  i  might  he  faithful  to  ths  Dcath^  ful^ 
filling  as  an  Hireling  my  Day,  'till  the  Shades  of  the  Evening  of 
Life  (hall  free  my  boul  from  the  Toils  of  the  Day  !  This  Even- 
ing, in  fecret  Prayer,  1  felt  exceeding  folemn,  and  fuch  longing 
Defires  after  Deliverance  from  Sin, and  afterConformity  toGod, 
as  melted  my  Heart.  Oh,  I  longed  to  be  delivered  from  this  Body 
of  Death  !  I  felt  inward  pleafmg  Pain,  that  I  could  not  be  con- 
formed toGod  entirely,  fully  and  forever.—  I  fcarce  ever  presch 
without  being  firft  vifited  with  inward  Corifli<51s  and  foreTrials.-- 
Bleffed  be  the  f^ord  for  thefs  Trials  and  Diihefil'S,  as  they  are 
blefs'd  for  my  humbh'ng. 

Monday,  OSiob.   18.  In  ihe  Morning,  felt  fome  Sweet ncf^, 
but  ftill  prcfs'd  thro'  fome  Trials  of  SomJ.      My  Life    is   a  con- 
ftant  Mixture  of  Confjlations  and  Conflicts,  and  wil!  be  1j  'lill 
arrive  at  the  World  of  Spirits. 

Tuefday,  O^ober,  19.  This  Morning  and  laft  Nigbr,  ftit  a 
fwe-et  Longitig  i.T  my  Soul  after  Holinefs  :  My  Soul  fccm'd  fb 
to  reach  and  (Wretch  towards  the  Mark  of  perfedl  Sanifity,  that 
it  was  ready  to  break  with  Longir-gs. 

Wcdnefday,  O^ober  20.  Exceeding  infirm  in  Body,exerc!red 
with  much  Pain,  and  very  life'efs  in  u'ivinc  Things. -•-  Kelt  a 
iittis  Swee:nef^ia  the.  Evening. 

Thurfd.iy 


48      ^/.  25.  r.&^  L  I  F  E  A.D.  1742. 

Tiiurfday,  OSfcber  21.  Had  a  very  deep  Senfe  of  the  Vanity 
of  the  World,  moft  of  the  Day  ;  had  little  more  Regard  to  it, 
than  if  1  had  been  ro  go  into  Eternity  the  next  Hour.  Thro' 
<iivine  Goodnefs,  I  felt  very  ferious  and  folemn.  O,  I  love  to 
Jive  on  the  Brink  of  Eternity,  io  my  Views  and  Meditations  [ 
This  gives  me  a  Iweet,  awful  and  reverential  Senfe  and  Appre- 
henfi 'n  of  God  and  divir^e  Things,  when  I  fee  my  felf  as  it 
YiCit  /landing  before  the  jfudgmeni-Seat  of  Chrj/i. 

Friday,  O^cber  22.  Uncommonly  weaned  from  the  World 
to  Day  ;  Mv  Sc»ul  delighted  to  be  a  Stranger  and  Pilgrim  on 
the  Earth  :  I  felr  a  Difpofition  in  me  never  to  have  any  Thing 
to  00  wiih  this  World  :  The  Charadlcr  given  of  fome  of  the 
ancient  People  ol  God,  in  Heb.  xi.  13,  was  verv  pleafing  to  me, 
2 hey  conffjjed  that  they  we*  e Pilgrims  &  Strangers  on  the  Earthy  by 

their  diiily  Practice  ;   and  O  that  I   could  always  do  fo  1 

Spent  fome  corfiderable  Time,  in  a  pleafant  Grove,  in  Prayer 
and  Meditation.  O  it  is  iweet,  to  be  thus  wean'd  fromFriends, 
and  from  my  felf,  and  dead  to  the  prefent  World,  that  fp  I 
may  live  wholly  /«  and  upon  the  bleiled  God  !  Saw  my  felf 
little,  l«)W5  and  vile,  in  my  (elf.-'-ln  theAfternoon,  preach*d  at 
Btth.ehem^  from  Deut.  viii.  2.  and  felt  fweetly  both  in  Prayer 
and  Preaching  :  Cjod  helped  me  to  fpeak  to  the  Hearts  of 
dear  Chriftjans.  Bltflld  be  the  Lord  for  this  Seafon  :  I  truft, 
they  a«'d  f  fhall  rfjoyce  en  ihisAccount  to  all  Eternity.—  Dear 
A'Jr.  Bellamy  came  in, while  I  was  making  the  firflPrayer  (  bting 
returned  Home  frcm  a  Journe\ )  and  after  Meeting,  we  walked 
away  together,  and  fpent  the  Evening  in  fweetly  coveifmg  on 
divineThings,af'>d  praying  together,  wiih  fweet  and  tender  Love 
to  each  other,  and  ieturn*d  to  Reft  with  our  Hearts  in  a  ferious 
fpiritual  Frame 

Saturday,  O^oh.  23.  Something  perj5lexed  and  confufed. 
Rode  this  Day  trcni  'tiihlelxim  to  Sujjbury. 

Lord's- Day, G675^  24.  Felt  fo  vile  and  unworthyjthat  I  fcarcc 
knew  how  to  converfc  with  human  Creatures. 

Mf-nday,  OlUiir  55.  [At  7/^r/fy-/:<';7A,]  In  the  Evening  en- 
joyed the  divine  PicfM  cc  in  ftcret  Prayer  :  It  was  a  fweet  and 
comfortable  Scafof  to  me  :  I\4y  Soul  Icr.gid  for Ged^  for  the  living 
Gcd  :  Enjoyed  a  f^tet  Solemnity  of  spirit,  and  longing  De- 
fne  after  the  Recovery  of  the  divine  Imape  in  my  Soul  :  Then 
jhall  I  he  Jaiiifcd.iubcn  1  f..au  ctiake  in  6  OD^i  Liktnejs^  and  ne- 
ver b::fore. 

Tucfday,  Gilder  26.  [At  JViO'SviffieU,']  Underwent  (he 
mcft  dreadful  D  ilrtfilsjunccr  a  tcnrcvi  my  vvviiUnwoithiners : 

\\ 


Mt.  25.     c/ ilfr.  David  Brained.    A.D.1742.    ^i^^ 

It  feemM  to  me,  I  defervcd  rather  to  be  driven  out  of  the  Place, 
than  to  have  any  Body  treat  me  with  any  Kindnefs,  or  come  to 
hear  me  preach.  And  verily  my  Spirits  were  fo  deprefs'd  at 
this  Time,  as  well  as  at  many  others,  that  it  was  impoffible  1 
Ihoald  treat  immortal  Souls  with  FaithfuJnefs  :  I  could  not  deal 
clofelv  &  faithfully  with  them,  I  felt  fo  infinitely  vile  m  myfelf. 
Oh  what  Vuft  andAfhes  I  am,  to  think  of  preachmg  theCjofpel 
to  o'thcrs  I  indeed,!  never  can  be  faithful  for  oneMoraent,but 
(hall  certainly  daub  with  untempend  Mortar,  if  God  don't  grant 
me  fpecial  Help.-In  theEvening,  I  went  to  the  Meeting-Houfc, 
and  it  lookM  to  me  near  as  eafy  tor  one  to  rife  out  of  the  Grave 
and  preach,  as  for  me.  However,  God  afforded  me  fome  Life 
and  Power,  both  in  Prayer  and  Sermon:  God  was  pleafed  to 
lift  me  up,  and  fhew  me  that  he  could  enable  me  to  preach. 
O  the  wonderful  Goodnefs  of  Gad  to  fo  vile  a  Smner  !---  Re- 
turned to  my  Quarters  ;  and  enjoy M  fome  Sweetnefs  in  Prayer 
alone,  and  mourn'd  that  I  could  not  Uve  more  to  God. 

Wednefday,  OSlober  27.  Spcat  the  Forenoon  in  Prayer  and 
Meditation  :  Was  not  a  little  concern'd  about  Preaching  in  the 
Afternoon  :  Felt  exceedingly  without  Strength,  and  very  helplefs 
indeed  *  Went  into  the  Mceting-Houfe,  afbamed  to  fee  any 
come  to  hear  fuch  an  unfpeakably  worthlefs Wretch.  However, 
God  enabled  me  to  fpeak  with  Ciearnefs,  Power,  &  Pungency, 
But  there  was  forae  Noife  and  Tumult  in  the  Ailembly,  that  1 
did  not  well  like,  and  endeavoured  to  bear  publick  Teftimony 
againft,  with  Moderation  and  Mildnefs,  through  the  Current  of 
my  Difcourfe.— In  the  Evening,was  enabled  to  be  in  fomeMea- 
fure  thankful  and  devoted  to  God. 

[The  Frames  and  Exercifes  of  hisMind,  during  the  four  next 
Days,  were  moftly  very  SimUar  to  thgfe  of  the  two  Days  paft  ; 
excepting  Intervals  of  confiderable  Degrees  of  divine  Peace  and 

Confolation.  ^  ,      ,        r  11      •   * 

The  Things  exprefs'd  within  the  Space  of  the  three  followmg 
Days  are  fuch  as  thefe  ;  fome  Seafons  of  Dejeaion,  muurning 
for  being  fodcftitute  of  the  Exercifes  of  Grace,  longing  to  be 
delivered  from  Sin,  preffmg  after  more  of  God,  Seafons  of  fweet 
Confolation,  precious  and  intimate  Converfe  with  God  in  lecret 
Prayer,  Sweetnefs  of  Chriftian  Converfation  kc.^"  W»thm  this 
.    Time  he  rode  from  Suffield  to  EajUury,  Hebron,  and  Lebanon.^ 

Thurfday,   l^o'oemb.  4.   [kt  Lebanon. 1^    Saw    much  of   my 

NQthingaeiSjmQft  oi  ihisDay  ;  buc  i^\i  eoftcerned  that  1  had  no 

*  H  mors 


50      Bt.is.  <The   LIFE  A.ai742. 

more  Senfe  of  my  Infufficiency  &  Unworthlnefs.     O  'tis  f\veet 
lying  in  tkeDuJi  !  But  'tis  diftreffingjto  feel  in  my  Soul  thatHell  of 
Corruption,  which  ftiJl  remains  in  me.— In  theAfternoon,  had  a 
Senfeof  theSwectnefsof  a  ftria  clofe  &  conftantDcvotcdnefs  to 
God ,  &  ray  Soul  was  comforted  with  theConfoIations  of  God ;  my 
Soul  felt  a  pleafing,  yet  painfulConcern,  left  1  fhould  fpend  fome 
Moments  without  God.     O  may  I  always  live  to  God.  —  In  the 
Evening,  was  vifitcd  by  fome  Friends,  and  fpent  the  Time  in 
Prayer  and  fuch  Converfation  as  tended  to  our  Edification.     It 
was  a  comfortable  Seafon  to  my  Soul :  I  felt  an  intenfe  Defire 
to  fpend  every  Moment  for  God.—  God  is  unfpeakably  graci- 
ous to  me  continually  :  In  Times  paft,  he  has  given  me  inex- 
preiiible  Swcetnefs  in  the  Performance  of  Duty  :  Frequently  my 
Soul  has  enjoyed  much  of  God  ;    but  has   been  ready  to  fay. 
Lord,   'tis  good  to  be  here  ;  and  fo  to  indulge  Sloth,  while  I  have 
lived  on  the  Sweetnefs  of  my  Feelings.     But  of  late,   God  has 
been  pleafed  to  keep  my  Soul  hungry ,2\ir\o^  continually  ;  fo  that 
I  have  been  fiU'd  with  aKind  of  a  pleafmgPain  :   When  I  really 
enjoy  God,   I  feel  my  Defires  of  him  the  more  infatiablc,  and 
rray  Thirftings  after  Holinefs  the  more  unquenchable  ;  and  the 
Lord  will  not  allow  me  to  feel  as  tho'  I  were  fully  fupplied  and 
fetjsfied,  but  keeps  me  ftill  reaching  forward  ;  and  1  feel  barren 
and  empty,  as  tho'  I  could  notlive»  without  more  of  God  in 
me  5  I  feel  afliamed  and  guilty  before  God.     Oh,[  fee,  theLow 
iJ  fpintual,   but  2  am  carnal/     I  don't,   f  can't  live  to  God. 
Oh  for  Holinefs  !  Oh  for  more  of  God  in  my  Soul  !     Oh  this 
pleafing  Pain  !  It  makes  my  Soul  prefs  after  God  ;    the  Lan- 
guage of  it  is.  Then /bail  I  be  fatisfiedy  when  I  awake  in  GOD's 
Likenefs  (Pfal.  xvii.  ult.)  but  never,  never  before  :   and  confc- 
quently  I  am  engaged  to  prefs  toward  the  Mark,  Day  by  Day. 
O  that  I  may  feel  this  continual  Hunger,  and   not  be  retarded, 
but  rather  animated  by  every  Cluftcr  from  Canaan,  to  reach  for- 
ward in  the  narrow  Way,  for  the  full  Enjoyment  andPofTeflion 
of  the  heavenly  Inheritance.     O  that  I  may  never  loiter  in  my 
heavenly  Journey.  ' 

[  Thefe  infatiable  Defires  after  God  and  Holinefs  continued 
the  two  next  Days,  with  a  great  Senfe  of  his  own  exceeding 
Unworthmefs,  and  the  Nothingnefs  of  the  Things  of  this 
World.] 

Lord's-Day,  Novemb.  7.     [At  Millington.]   It  fecm'd  as  if 
fuch  ap  unholy  Wretch  as  1  never  could  arrive  at  thatBleffednefs,     ' 
to  hzkoly,  as  Gfdis  holy.    At  NoonJ  longed  for  Sanaification, 

and 


Mu  25.       of  Mr.  David  Braincrd.     A.D.1742.    51 

rfhd  Conformity  toGod.     Oh,  That  is  the  All,  the  All  ! 
The  Lord  help  me  to  prefs  afUr  GOD  for  ever. 

Monday,  Novemb,^,  Towards  Night,  enjoyed  muchSweet- 
nefs  in  fecret  Prayer,  (o  that  my  Soul  longed  for  an  Arrival  m 
the  heavtnly  Country,  the  blcfled  Paradlfe  of  God.  Thro'  divine 
Goodnefs,  Ihavefcarce  feen  the  Day,  for  two  Months,  but 
Death  has  look'd  fo  pleafant  to  me  at  one  Time  or  other  of  the 
Day,  that  I  could  have  rejoyced  the  pre/ent  jfhould  be  my  lafl^ 
notwirtiftanding  ray  prefling  inward  Trials  and  Conflias :  And  I 
truft,  the  Lord  will  finally  make  me  a  Conqueror^  and  more  than 
fo  ;  that  I  fhali  be  able  to  ufc  that  triumphant  Language,  O 
Deaths  where  is  thy  Sting  !     And  O  Grave,  ivhsre  is  thyViSiory  ! 

[Within  the  next  ten  Days,  the  following  Things  are  ex- 
prefs'd  i  Longing  and  wreftling  to  be  holy  and  to  live  to  God  ; 
a  Defire  that  every  fingle  Thought  might  be  for  God  ;  feeling 
guilty,  that  his  Thoughts  were  no  more  fwallowed  up  m  God  ; 
fweet  Solemnity  and  Calmnefs  of  Mind,  Submiflion  and  Rehg- 
nation  to  God,  great  Weanednefs  from  theWorld,  Abafement 
in  the  Duft,  Grief  at  fome  vain  Converfation  that  wasobfsrved, 
Sweetnefst  from  Time  to  Time  in  fecret  Prayer  and  in  con- 
verfmg  and  praying  with  Chriftian  Friends.  And  every  Day  he 
appear°s  to  have  been  greatly  engaged  in  the  great  Bufmels  of 
Religion  and  living  to  God,  without  interruption.] 

Friday,  Kovemb.  19.  [hi  New- Haven]  Receiv'd  a  Letter 
from  the  Rev.  Mr.  Pembertono^  A'^m;- r^^ri,  defiring  me  fpec- 
dily  to  go  down  thither,  and  confult  about  the  Indian  Affairs  m 
thofe  Parts,  and  to  meet  certain  Gentleoien  there,  that  were 
intrufted  with  thofe  Affairs  :  My  Mind  was  inftantly  feizM  with 
Concern  ;  fo  I  retired  with  two  or  threeChriftian  Friends,  and 
prayed  ;  and  indeed  it  was  a  fweet  Time  with  me  i  1  was  ena- 
bled to  leave  my  felf  and  all  my  Concerns  with  God  ;  and  taking 
Leave  of  Friends,  I  rode  io.Ripton,  and  was  cooiforted  in  an 
Opportunity  to  fee  and  conveife  with  dear  Mr.  Mills, 

[  In  the  four  next  followingDays,  he  was  fometimes  opprefsM 
with  the  Weight  of  that  great  Affair,  about  which  Mr.  Pern- 
berton  had  written  to  him  ;  but  was  enabled  fromTime  to^  i^e 
to  coji  bis  Burden  on  the  Lord,  and  to  commit  himfelf  and  allhis 
Concerns  to  him  :  And  he  continued  ft  ill  in  a  Senfc  of  t|jf  Lx* 
cellency  of  Holinefs,  and  Longings  after  it,  and  earneftDelires 
of  thsAdvanceroent  of  Cbrift'sKingdw  iu  theWorld  %  and  haj 

Ha  ^f^ra 


52      ^V.  25.  y.^^  L I F  E  A.a  1 742; 

from  Time  to  Time  fweet  Comfort  in  Meditation  and 
Prayer.] 

Weonefday,  Novemh.  24.  Came  to  New-York;  fdt  ftill 
much  concerned  about  the  Importance  of  my  Bufinefs  ;  put  up 
many  carneftRequefts  to  God  for  his  Help  and  Direaion  ;  was 
confufed  with  the  Noife  and  Tumult  of  the  City  ;  enjoyed  but 
little  Time  alone  with  God  ;  but  my  Soul  longed  after  Him. 

Thurfday,  Novemb.  25.  Spent  much  Time  in  Prayer  and 
Supplication  :  Was  examined  by  fome  Gentlemen,  of  my 
Chriftian  Experiences,  and  my  Acquaintance  with  Divinity, 
and  fome  other  Studies,  in  order  to  my  Improvement  in  that 
important  AfFair  of  Gofpellizing  the  Heathen  ;  ||  Was  made 
fenfible  of  my  great  Ignorance  and  Unfitncfs  for  publick  Ser- 
vice :  I  had  the  moft  abafmg  Thoughts  of  my  felf,  I  think,  that 
ever  I  had  ;  I  thought  my  felf  the  worft  Wrench  tkat  ever 
Jived  :  it  hurt  me  &  pained  my  very  Heart,  that  any  Body  fliould 
Ihew  me  any  Refpedt :  Alas  j  methought,  how  fadly  they  are 
deceived  in  me  ;  how  miferably  would  they  be  difappointed,  if 
they  knew  my  Infide  !  Oh  my  Heart  !  —  And  in  this  deprefsM 
Condition,  1  was  forced  to  go  and  preach  to  a  confiderable 
Aflcmbly,  before  fome  grave  and  learned  Minifters  ;  but  felt 
fuch  a  PrefTure  from  a  Senfe  of  my  Vilenefs,  Ignorance  &  Unfit- 
nefs^tu  appear  in  Pubiick,  that  J  v/as  almoft  overcome  with  it  ; 
my  Soul  was  grieved  for  the  Congregation,  that  they  Ihould  fit 
there  to  hear  fuch  a  dead  Dog  as  I  preach  ;  I  thought  my  felf 
infinitely  indebted  to  the  People,  and  longed  that  God  would 
reward  them  with  the  Rewards  of  his  Grace.— I  fpent  much  of 
the  Evening  alone. 


H  TMq  Gentlemen  that  examined  Mr.  drainer d^  were  the 
Currefpondents,  in  New-Tork^New-Jerfey  zudPenn/ihania, 
of  the  honourable  Society  m  Scttland  for  propagating 
Chriftian  Knowledge  ;  to  whom  was  committed  the 
Management  of  their  AfFairs  in  thofe  Parts,  and  who 
were  now  met  at  New-Tor k. 


PART 


'JEl.  25-     fl/ iWr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1742.     53 

Part     IV. 

From  the  Time  of  his  Examination  hy  the 
Correfpondents  of  the  Society  for  propa- 
gating Chrifiian  Knowledge,  and  being 
appointed  //6^/r  Miffionary,  to  his  firji 
Entrance  on  the  Bufmef  of  his  Miffion 
among  the  Indians  at  Kaunaumeek. 

FRlday,   Vwemh.  26.  Had  ftill  a  Senfe  of  my  great  Vile- 
nefs,  and  endeavoured  as  much  as  I  could  to  keep  alone. 
Oh,  what  a  Nothing,  what  Dull  and  Aftes  am  I  !    -En- 
joy'd  fome  Peace  and  Comfort  in  fpreading  my  Complamts  be- 
fore the  God  of  all  Grace.  ^    ,  ,     n^A  »;.h 
Saturday,  Nmemb.  27.  Committed  my  Soul  to  God  with 
fome  Degree  of  Comfort  ;    left  New-York  about  n,ne  m  the 
Morning;  came  away  with  a  diftreffing  Senfe  ft.U   of  my  un- 
fpeakableUnworthinefs.     Surely  I  may  well  love  all  my  Bre- 
thren i  for  none  of  them  all  is  fo  vile  as  I ;    whatever  they  do 
outwardly,   yet  it  feems  to  me  none  is  confc.ous  of  fo  much 
Guilt  before  God.     Oh  my  Leaniiefs,  my  Barrennefa,  my  ^-^r- 
na!ity,and  naft  Bitternefs,  &VVant  of  »Gofpel-Temper  !  Thefc 
Thincs  opprefs  mv  Soul.-Rode  fromA?m-ror*,th,rtyM.les,  to 
WhiuPlaim,   and  moil  of  the  Way  continued  lifl.ng  up  my 
Heart  to  Qod  for  Mercy  and  purifying  Grace  ;  and  Ipent  tlie 
Evening  much  dejefled  in  Spirit. 

r  The  three  next  Davs,  he  continued  in  this  Frame.in  a  great 
Senfe  of  his  own  Vilene'fs,  with  an  evident  Mixture  of  Melan- 
choly, in  no  fmall  Degree  ;  but  had  fome  Intervals  of  Com- 
fort and  God's  fenfible  Ptefence  with  him.  ] 

Wednefday,  Decmb.  I.  My  Soul  breath'd  after  God,  in 
fweet  fpiritual  and  longing  Defires  of  Conformity  to  him  ;  my 
Ssul  was  brought  to  reft  it  felf  and  all  on  his  neh  Grace,  and 


si     Ml  25.  ne   LIFE 

felt  Strength  and  Encouragement  to  do  or  fufferany  Thinp  that 
divine  Providence  (hould  allot  me.— Rode;  about  twenty  Miles 
from  Stratfield  to  TSIeivtown,  * 

[Within  the  Space  of  the  next  nine  Days,  he  went  a  Jour- 
ney from  Newion  to  Haddam,  his  Native  Tovi^n  j  and  after 
flaying  there  fomeDays,  returned  again  into  theWeftern  Part  of 
ConneSiicut,  k  came  ioSouthbury.  In  hisAccount  of  theFrames 
and  Exercifes  of  his  Mjnd,  during  this  Space  of  Time,  are  fuch 
Thmgs  as  tbefe  5  Frequent  Turns  of  Dejedlion,  a  Senfe  of"  his 
Vilenefs,  Emptinefs,  and  an  unfathomable  Abyfs  of  defperatc 
Wickednefs  in  his  Heart,  attended  with  a  Conviaion  that  he 
had  never  ken  but  little  of  it  ;  bitterly  mourning  over  his  Bar- 
rennefs,  being  greatly  grieved  that  he  could  not  hve  to  God,  to 
y9homhQOViQdh\S2\\UuThoufaKdTim45  ;  crvin^  out,A/^£/^;/- 
nefs,  my  Leannefs  !  A  Senfe  of  the  Meetnc;.  'l^  '^uitabieneft 
of  hfs  lying  in  the  Duft  beneath  God's  Feet,  Fe:  vcncy  and  Ar- 
dour in  Prayer,  longing  to  live  to  God,  a  being  aiflided  with 
fome  impertment  trifling  Converfation  that  he  heard ;  but  enjoy- 
ing Sweetnefs  in  Chriftian  Converfation.] 

Saturday,i)^^^«?^.ii.  Converfed  with  a  dear  Friend,  to  whom 
I  had  Thought  of  giving  a  liberal  Education,  and  being  at  (he 
whole  Charge  of  it,that  he  might  be  fitted  fur  the  Gofpel-Mini- 
ftry.  *  I  acquainted  l;im  with  my  Thoughts  in  that  Matter,  and 
fo  left  him  to  confider  of  it,  'till  I  fliouJd  fee  him  again.     Then 


« 


Mr.  Braimrd  hzv'wg  now   undertaken  the   Bufinefs  of  a 
Miflionary  to  the  Indianiy  and  expcding  in  a  little  Time  to 
leave  his  native  Country,  to  go  among  the  Savages,  into  the 
Wildernefs,  far  diftant^and  fpend  the  Remainder  of  his  Life 
among  them,  aod  having  fome  Eftate  left  him  by  his  Father, 
«nd  thinking  he  ihould  have  noOccafion  for  it  among  them, 
(  tho'  afterwards, as  he  told  me,  he  found  himfdf  miftakcn) 
he  fet  himfelf  to  think  which  Way  he  might  fpend  it  moft 
to  theGlory  of  God  ;  &no  Way  prefenting^'to  his  Thoughts, 
wherein  he  could  do  more  Good  with  it,   than  by  being  at 
the  Charge  of  educating  fofiie  young  Perfon  for  the  Mini- 
ftry,  that  appear 'd  to  be  of  good  Abilities  and  well  difpofed, 
he  pitched  upon  this  Perfon  here  fpoken  of,  to    this  End  ; 
who  accordingly  was  foon  put  to  Learning  ;  and  Mr.Brai- 
nerd  continued  to  be  at  the  Charge  of  his  Education  from 
Year  to  Year,  fo  long  as  he   (Mr.  Braimrd)   lived,  which 
was  'till  this  young  Man  was  ,C3rricd  through  his  third 
Year  in  CoJlege.  '  I 


^/ Mr.  David  Braincrd,      AD.  1742;     55 

I  rode  to  Bethlehem^  and  fo  came  to  Mr.  Bellamy  s  Lodgings  ; 
/pent  the  Evening  with  him  in  fweet  Converfation  and  Prayer  : 
We  recommended  the  important  Concern  before  mentioned  (of 
fending  my  Friend  to  College)  unto  the  God  of  all  Grace. 
BlefTed  be  the  Lord  for  this  Evening's  Opportunity  together. 

Lord's-Day,  Decemb.  12.  I  felt,  in  the  Morning,  as  if  I  had 
little  or  no  Power  either  to  pray  or  preach,  and  felt  a  diftrefling 
Need  of  divine  Help  :  1  went  to  Meeting  trembling  ;  But  it 
pleafed  God  to  affift  me  in  Prayer  &  Sermon  :  1  think,  my  Soul 
fcarce  ever  penetrated  fo  far  into  the  immaterial  World,  in  any 
onePrayer  that  ever  I  made,nor  were  my  Devotions  ever  fo  much 
refined, and  free  from  grofsConceptions,  &  Imaginations  framed 
frcm  beholding  material  Objedls.  I  preach'd  with  fome  Sweet- 
nefsjfrom  Math,M\.2^^.But  feek  ye firji  &c.  And  in  theAfternoon 
from  Rom.  xv.  30.  u^nd  now  1  befeech  you^  Srethren^  &c.  There 
was  much  Affection  in  the  A ficmbly.  This  has  been  a  fweet 
Sabbath  to  me  ;  and  blefled  be  God,  I  have  Reafon  to  think, 
that  my  Religion  is  become  more  refined  and  fpiritual,byMcans 
of  my  late  inward  Conflicts.  Jmen  !  May  I  always  be  willing 
that  God  fhould  ufe  his  own  Methods  with  me. 

Monday,  Decemb.  13.  Join'd  in  Prayer  with  Mr.  Bellamy  ; 
and  found  Sweetnefs  and  Compofurc  in  parting  with  hira,  who 
went  a  Journey.  Enjoy'd  fome  Svvee.tnefs  through  the  Day, 
and  juft  at  Night  rode  down  to  Woodbury, 

I'uefday,  Decemb,  14.  Some  Perplexity  bung  on  my  Mind: 
wasdiftrefs'd,  lalt  Night  and  this  Morning,  for  the  Intercft  of 
"Lion.,  cfpecially  on  Account  of  xh^  falfe  Appearances  of  Religion , 
that  do  but  rather  breed  Confufion,  efpccially  in  fome  Places.  I 
cried  to  God  for  Help,  to  enable  me  to  bear  Teflimony  againft 
thofe  Things,  which  inftead  of  promoting,  do  but  hinder  the 
Progrefs  ofvital  Piety.  In  the  Afternoon,  rode  dov/n  toSouth- 
burvy  and  converfcd  again  with  my  Friend  about  the  important 
Affair  of  his  following  the  Work  of  the  Miniftry  ;  and  he  ap- 
peared much  inclined  to  devote  himfclf  to  that  Work,  if  God 
ftiould  fucceed  his  AttempJs  to  qyali/y  himfelf  for  fo  great  a 
Work.  In  the  Evening,  I  preach'd  from  i  The/,  iv.  8.  And 
endeavoured,  tho*  withTenderriefs,  to  undermine  falfeReligion. 
The  Lord  gave  me  fome  AfTiftance  ;  but  however,  I  fcemM 
fo  vile,  I  was  afhamed  to  befeen  when  I  came  outoftheMeet- 
ing-Houfe. 

W^(ine(dzy,  Decemb.  15.  Enjoyed  fomething  of  God  toDay, 
both  in  fccrel  and  locial  Prayer  ;  but  was  fenuble  of  much  Bar- 
rennefs,  and  Defcd  in  Duty,  as  well  as  my  Inability  to  help  my 


55    Mt.  25.  ne  LIFE 

felf  for  the  Time  to  come,  or  to  perform  the  Work  and  Bufincfe 
Ihavetodo.  Afterwards, felt  muc^i  of  the  Sweetnefsof  Reh'gion, 
and  the  Tendernefs  of  the  Gofpel-Temper  :  was  far  from  Bit- 
ternefs,  and  found  a  dear  Love  to  all  Mankind,  and  was  afraid 
of  fcarcely  any  Thing  fo  much  as  left  fome  Motion  of  Anger  or 
Refentment  Ihould  fome  Time  or  other  creep  into  my  Heart. 
Had  fome  comforting  Soul-Refreihing  Difcourfe  with  fome  dear 
Friends,  juft  as  we  took  our  Leave  of  each  other,  and  fuppofed 
it  might  be  likely  we  fhould  not  meet  again  'till  we  came  to  the 
eternal  World.  *  But  I  doubt  not, thro'  Grace,  but  that  fome  of 
»js  fhali  have  a  happy  Meeting  there,  and  blefs  God  for  this  Sea- 
fan,  as  well  as  many  others.   Amen. 

ThurfdayjD^f^-^^.  16.  Rode  down  toDarby  ;  had  fome  fwect 
Thoughts,  on  the  Road  :  My  Thoughts  were  very  clear,  efpe- 
rialiy  on  theEfi'ence  of  our  Salvation  byChrift,from  thofeWords, 
Thou /halt  call  hi:  Name  Jefus^  he, 

Friday,  Decemb.  17.  ^pent  muchTime  in  fweet  Converfation 
on  fpiritual  Things  vviih  dear  Mr.  Humphreys.  Rode  ioRipton  j 
fpcnt  fome  Time  in  Pravcr  with  dear  Chriftian  Friends. 

Saturday,  Z^etvw/'.  1  S.i^pent  muchTime  inPrayer  in  the  Woods: 
feem'd  raifed  above  tiieThings  of  the  World  :  raySoul  was  Itrong 
in  the  Lord  of  Hoft^  :   But  was  fenfible  of  great  Barrennefs. 

LordVDay,  Decemb.  19.  At  the  Sacrament  of  the  Lord's 
Supper,  fcem'd  ftrong  in  the^  Lord  ;  and  the  World  with  all  its 
Frowns  ti  Flatteries  in  a  great  Meafure  difappear'd,  fo  that  my 
Soul  had  nothing  to  do  vvith  them  ;  and  I  felt  aDifpofition  to  be 
wholly  and  forever  the  Lord's.--  In  theEvening,  enjoyed  fome- 
thing  of  the  divine  Prefence  ;  Had  a  humbling  Senfeof  my  Vile- 
nefs,  Barrcnnif5,and  Sinfulncfs.  Oh,  it  wounded  me, to  think  of 
the  Mifimprovtrnent  0/  Time  !     God  be  merciful  to  me  a  Sinner, 

Monday.  Decemb.  20.  Spent  this  Day  in  Prayer, Reading,  and 
Writing  ;  and  enjoyed  fome  Afliftance,  efpccially  in  correcting 
fome  Thoughts  on  a  certain  Subject  ,  but  had  a  mournful  Senfe 
of  my  Barrennefs. 


*  It  had  been  determined  by  the  CommifTioners,  who  em- 
ployed Mr.  Brainerdzsz  Miilionary,  that  he  fhould  go  as 
faon  as  miehi  be  convcnientlv^to  the  Indians  living  near  the 
Fork5  oi  Delaware  River  '\n  Pen/yhanla  zr^d  the  Indr.ns  on 
Sufquehanneh  River  ;  which  being  <ar  off,  whcie  he  would 
be  e^pofcd  to  manv  Hardfhips  nr^J  Danger?  j  This  was 
the  Occaficn  oi  his  takin;^:  f.c:;.^,-  .,',f  his  Friends  in  this 
Manner.  '  TueUla?. 


c/ Afr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1742,     57 

Tiit(dzy,  Decmh,  21 »  Had  a  Senfe  of  my  Infufficiency  for 
any  publick  Work  and  Bufinefs,  as  well  as  to  live  to  God.  I 
rode  over  to  Derby^  and  preach'd  there  :  It  plcafed  (Sod  to  give 
me  very  fweet  Affiftance  and  Enlargement,  and  th  enable  me  to 
fpeak  with  a  foft  and  tender  Power  and  Energy.—  We  had  after- 
wards a  comfortable  Evening  in  Singing  and  Prayer  :  God  ena- 
bled me  to  pray  with  as  much  Spirituality  and  Sweetnefs  as  I 
have  done  for  fome  Time  :  My  Mind  feem'd  to  be  uncloathed 
of  Senfe  and  Imagination,  and  was  in  a  Mcafure  let  into  tHe 
immaterial  World  of  Spirits.  This  Day  and  Evening  was,  I 
truft,  thro'  infinite  Goodnefs  made  very  profitable  to  a  Number 
of  us,  to  advance  our  Souls  in  Holinefs  and  Conformity  to  God  : 
The  Glory  be  to  Him  forever  :  Jmen.  How  blefled  'tis  to 
grow  more  and  more  like  God  ! 

Wednefday,  Decemb.  22.  Enjoyed  fome  Affiftance  in  Preach- 
ing at  RIpton  j  but  my  Soul  mourned  within  me  for  my  Barren- 

nels. 

Thurfday,  Decemh.  23.  Enjoy'd,  I  truft,  fomethingof  God 
this  Morning  in  Secret.  Oh  how  divinely  fweet  is  it  to  come 
into  the  Secret  of  his  Prcfence,  &  abide  in  his  Pavilion  !— Took 
an  afFeaionate  Leave  of  Friends,  not  expeding  to  fee  Them 
again  for  a  very  confiderable  Time,  if  ever  in  ihisWorld.  Rode 
with  Mr.  Humphreyi  to  his  Houfe  at  Derby  ;  fpent  the  Time  iii 
fweet  Converfation  ;  my  Soul  was  rfereftiM  and  fweetly  melted 
with  divine  Things.  Oh  that  I  was  always  confecra.ted  toGod. 
Near  Night,  \x':^d.Q  to  New- Haven,  and  there  enjoyed  fome 
Sweetnefs  in  Prayer  and  Converfation,  with  fome  dear  Chriftian 
Friends  :  My  Mind  was  fweetly  ferious  and  compofed  :  Hue 
alas,  I  too  much  loft  the  Senfe  of  divine  Things  I 

[He  continued  much  in  the  fame  Frame  of  Mind,  and  in  like 
Exercifes,  the  two  followingDays.] 

LordVDay,  Dectmb.  26.  Felt  much  Sweetnefs  and  Tender- 
nefs  in  Prayer,  efpccially  my  whole  Soul  feem'd  to  love  my  worft 
Enemies,  and  was  enabled  to  pray  for  thofc  that  are  Strangers 
and  Enemies  to  God  with  a  great  Degree  of  Softnefs  and  pache- 
tick  Fervour.  In  the  Evening^rode  from  New-Haven  to  Bran- 
ford,  after  I  had  kneel'd  down  and  pray'd  with  a  Number  of 
dear  Chriftian  Friends  in  a  very  retired  Place  in  iheWoods^and 

fo  parted.  n    r     •  j  ^    u  a 

Monday,  Decemb.  27,  Enjoyed  a  preciousSeafon  indeeU  ;  haa 

a  fweet  melting  Senfe  of  divine  Things,  of  tbe  pureSpuuuality 


58    m.  25.  r-6^  LIFE 

of  the  Religion  of  Chrift  Jefus.  In  the  Evening,  I  preach'd 
from  Matth.  vi.  33.  with  much  Freef^om,  and  fv/eet  Power  and 
Pungency  :  The  Prefenc-e  of  God  attended  our  Meeting.  O 
the  Sweetnefs'  the  Tendernefs  I  felt  in  my  Soul  !  If  ever  I  felt 
the  Temper  of  Chrift,  I  had  fome  Senfe  of  it  now.  Blelled  bd 
my  God,  I  have  feldcm  enjcTy'd  a  more  comfortable  and  profita- 
bJe  Day  than  this.  O  that  I  could  fpend  all  myTime  for  God. 
Tuefday,  Decemh,  28.  Rode  from  Branford  to  Haddani'  In 
the  Morning,  myClearnefs  and  Sweetnefs  in  divine  Things  con- 
tinued ;  but  afterwards  my  fpiritualLife  fcnfibly  declined. 

[The  next  twelve  Days,  be  was  for  the  moft  Part  extreamly 
dejedtedjdifcou raged  and  diftrefTed,  and  was  evidently  very  much 
under  the  Power  of  Melancholy  ;  and  there  are  from  Day  to 
Day  moft  bitter  Complaints  of  exceeding  Vilenefs,  Ignorance, 
Corruption,  an  amazing  Load  of  Guilt,  Unwortbinefs  to  creep 
on  God's  Earth,  everlafting  Ufslefnefs,  Fitnefs  forNothing,^V. 
and  fometimes  Expreflions  even  of  Horror  at  the  Thoughts  of 
ever  Preaching  again.  But  yet  in  this  Time  of  grcatDeje6tion, 
he  rpeaks  offeveral  Intervals  of  divine  Help  and  Comfort. 

[The  three  next  Days,  which  were  fpent  at  Hebron  and  thd 
Crank  (a  Parifh  in  Lebanon)  he  had  Relief,  and  enjoyed  confide- 
rable  Comfort.] 

Friday,    Jan.  14.   174^,3.     My  fpiritual  Confli<5ls  to   Day 
were  unfpeakably   dreadful,    heavier  than   the  Mountains  and 
overflowing  Floods  :  I  feem'd  inclofed,  as  it  were,    in  Hell  it 
felf  !     I  was  deprived  of  all  Senfe  oi  God,    even   of  the   Being 
of  a  God  ;  and  that  was  my  Mifery  !   I  had  no  awfulApprehen- 
lions  of  God  as  angry.     This  was  Diftrefs,  the  neareft  a-kin  to 
the  Damned's  Torments,   that  1   ever  endured  ;    Their   Tor- 
ment, I  am  fure,  will  confift  much  in  a  Privation  of-God,  and 
confeqaently  of  all  Good.     This  taught  me  the  abfolute  Depen- 
dance  of  a  Creature  upon  God  the  Creator,  for  every  Crumb  of 
Happinefs  it  enjoys.     Oh  !  I  feel  that  if  there  is  no  Go&',    iho' 
I  might  live  for  ever  here,  and  enjoy  not  only  jlhis,  but  all  other 
Worlds,  I  fhould  be  ten  Thoufand  Times  more  miferable  than 
a  Toad  I     My  Soul  was  in  fuch  Anguilh   I  could  not  eat,    but 
felt  as  I  fnppofed  a  poor  Wretch  would  that  isjuft  going  to  the 
Place  of  Execution.     I  was  almoft  fwallowed  up  with  Anguifh, 
when  I  faw  People  gathering  together  to  hear  me  preach.    How- 
ever, I  went  in  that  Dif^refs  to  the  Houfe  of  God,   and  found 
not  much  ReJk/  in  the  fi^ft  Prayer ;  It  fecm'd  as  if  God  would 

let 


of  Mr.  David  Brainerd.      A.D.  1 743.     551 

•w^rH?     in  mv  Difcourfe  from  Veut,  vm.  ^*    ^  ^ 

7oJ:^  mefome  Freedom  and  Enlargement     fome  Power  .nd 
SpirSuy  iTnd  I  fpent  the  Evening  fome.htng  comfortably. 

[The  two  next  Days,  his  Comfort  ;°"/'""^''.  ^"^=1^';,;^: 

Part  of  the  Day  had  more  Freedom.     Un  H  ueiuay  ne 
Canterbury,  and  continued  more  comfortable.] 

Ppnnle  to  lovc  one  anoiner,    ana  noc  lu  ^^^"1^  , , 

as  aS  anl  d  ,o  try  all  theirBrethren  by.  Bat  was  much  p  ef  d. 
Lft  of  the  Day/with  a  Senfe  of  my  own  Ba  neft  mwad  Im- 
purity, and  unfpeakable  Corruption.     Spent   the  tvenmg  in 

'TfuSr>?"o!t;rto  my  Brother.  Houfe  between 
Jvl'v^and'Zw  :  and  preach'd  in  '^^^E-'j-S  °^;^t 
ber  of  People:  enjoy'd  neither  Freedom  nor  Spirituality  , 

faw  my  felf  exceeding  unworthy.  p„„fl;;i,  .    .„:r,\'6  but 

Friday,  7<J«.li.  Had  great  inward  Conflifls  ,  enjo>  a  out 
little  Comfort.  Went  to  fee  Mr.  /r,7/,-.«,.  of  i.^.^-,  anj 
fpent  feveral  Hours  with  him  ;  and  was  P'^Xr  '^^l"^Zt 
Ss  ferious,  deliberate  and  impartial  Way  of  Difcou.i.  about 

Religion.  ^^^^  ^^  ^^  ^'i'^i;l    „„fi,   t3 

LordVDav.  7<>«.  23.  Scarce  ever  felt  my  felf  fo  unfit   to 
exU^^  asnow     1  faw,  1  was  not  worthy  of  a  Place  among  .hi 
ii.   ^here  I  am    oing.  if  God  permit :  I  .hou^,h.,    fnou 
be  afhamL-d  to  look  them  in  the  Face,    and  much  "i"  «   f Jf  = 
ay  Refpea  fhewn  me  there.     Indeed  1   felt  ^   ft»^''-;^^J 
from  the  Earth,  as  if  all  Places  were  too  good  for  "^h^^;^^  f. 
as  I  •  I  thou.'ht  1  (hould  be  afhamed  to  go  among  the  very  sava 
ges  of  JMca";  I  appeared  to  my  felf  a  Creature  fi'  f-I^°«fmg 
Neither  Heaven  nor  Earth.-  None  knows,   but  thofe  that  teel 
it,  what  the  Soul  endures  that  is  fenfibly  ftut  out   rom  the  Fie 
fcnse  of  God  :  Alas,  'lis  more  bitter  than  P eath  . 

12  '■ 


€o      JSl  25.  r.^^  L  I  F  E    • 

[On  Monday,  he  rode  to  Sioningtoivn,  Mr.  FIfi's  Parifh.— 
On  Tuefday  he  exprefTes  confiderableDegrees  of  fpiritual  Com- 
fort and  Refrefhment.j 

Wedncfd?iy.,  Jan.  26.  Preach'd  to  a  pretty  largeAfTembly  at 
Mr.  Fi/h*s  MeetingHoufe  :  Infilled  on  Humility,  &  Stedfaftnefs. 
in  keeping  God's  Commands,  and  that  thro'  Humility  we  fhould 
prefer  one  another  in  Love,  and  not  make  our  own  Frames  the 
Rule  by  which  we  judge  others.  I  felt  fweetly  calm  and,  full  of 
brotherly  Love  ;  and  never  more  free  from  Party-Spirit.  I 
hope,  fome  Good  will  follow,  that  Chriftians  will  be  freed 
from  -^alfe  j  oy,  and  Party- Zeal,   and  cenfuring  one  another. 

[On  Thurfday,  after  confiderable  Time  fpent  in  Prayer  and 
Chriflian  Converfation,    he  rode  to  New-London] 

Friday,  Jan.  28.  Here  I  found  fome  fallen  into  fome  Extra- 
vagances, too  much  carried  away  with  a  falfe  Zeal  and  Bitter- 
nefs.  Oh,  the  Want  of  a  Gofpel-Temper  is  greatly  to  be  la- 
mented. Spent  theEvening  in  converfing  with  fome  about  fome 
Points  of  Condu6^  in  both  Miniflers  and  private  Chriftians  ;  but 
did  not  agree  with  them  ;  God  had  not  taught  them  with  Briers. ^ 
and  '^Thorns  to  be  of  a  kind  Difpofition  toward  Mankind. 

[On  Saturday,  he  rode  to  Eaft-Haddam^  and  fpent  the  three 
following  Days  there  ;  and  in  that  Space  of  Time  he  fpeaks  of 
his  feelingWeanednefs  from  the  World,  a  Senfe  of  the  Nearnefs 
of  Eterp.ity,  fpecial  AfBftance  in  praying  for  the  Enlargement 
pf  Chrift's  Kingdom,  Times  of  fpiritual  C®mfort  &c.] 

Wedncfday,  Feb.  2.  Preach'd  my  Farewell-Sermon,  laft 
Night,  at  the  Floufe  of  an  aged  Man,  who  had  been  unable  to 
aticnd  on  the  publick  Worfliip  for  fome  Time  ;  and  thisMorn- 
ing,  fpent  liie  Time  in  Prayer,  almoli  wherever  I  went  ;  and 
having  taken  Leave  of  Friends,  I  fet  out  on  my  Journey  towards 
thw  Indians  \  tho*  by  the  Way  I  was  to  fpsnd  fome  Time  at 
I^ a II- Hampton  on  Lang-IJIand^hy  theLeavc  of  theCommiilioners 
who  employ^  me  in  the  Indian  Affair  ;  *  and  being  accompa- 


The  Reafon  why  the  CommifHoners  or  Correfpondents 
did  not  order  Mr.  Brainerd  to  go  immediately  to  the  Indi- 
an^i  and  enter  on  his  Bufmefs  as  a  Miflionary  to  them,  was 
that  thePFjnter  was  not  judged  to  be  a  convenient  Seafon  for 
him  firft  to  go  out  into  the  Wjldernefs,  and  enter  on  the 
Difficulties  and  Hardftiips  he  m-ift  there  be  cxpofed  to. 

nied 


1 


(?/ Afr.  David  Brainerd.      A.D.1743.      6t 

nied  by  a  Meflengcr  from  Eaji- Hampton,  we  travelled  io  Lyme. 
On  the  Road  I  felt  an  uncommon  PrefTure  of  Mmd  •  I  feem  d 
to  ftruegle  hard  for  fome  Pieafure  in  fomething  here  be  ow  and 
feem'd^ioth  to  give  up  all  for  gone  ;  but  ther.  faw  my  felf  evident- 
ly  throwing  my  felf  into  all  Hardfhips  and  DiftreiTes  m  my  pre- 
fentUndertaking  ;  I  thought  .t  would  be  lefs  d.fficult  to  he  dowa 
in  the  Grave  :  But  yet  I  chcfc  to  go,  rather  than  Iky.—  Came 
to  Lyme  that  Night. 

r  He  waited  the  two  next  Days  for  a  PafTage  over  tlieSound, 
and  fpent  much  of  the  Time  m  inward  Confliaa  and  Deje^ion, 
but  had  feme  Comfort. 

On  Saturday,  he  crofs'd  the  Sound,  landed  at  Oyjief^ Ponds  on 
Long- 1  (land,  and  travelled  from  thence  to  E aft- Hampton.  And 
the  feven  following  Days  he  fpent  therc,for  the  moft  Part,under 
extream  Deieaion  and  Gloominefs  of  Mind,  with  great  Cora- 
plaints  of  Darknefs,  Ignorance  &c.  Yet  his  Heart  appears  to 
have  been  conftantly  engaged  in  the  great  Bufmefs  of  Religion, 
much  concerned  for  the  Intercft  of  Religion  m  Eaji-Hampton, 
and  praying  and  labouring  much  for  it.  ] 

Saturday,  Fib,  12.  Enjoyed  a  little  more  Comfort,  was  ena- 
bled to  meditate  with  fome  Compofure  of  Mind  ;  and  efpecially 
in  the  Evening,  found  my  Soul  more  refrefh'd  in  Prayer,  than 
at  any  Time  of  late  ;  my  Soul  feem'd  io  take  hold  of  God  t 
Strength,  Si  was  comforted  with  hisConfolations.  O  how  Iweet 
are  fome  Glimpfcs  of  divine  Glory  !  How  ftrengthemng  and 
quickening.  ,  _  - 

Lord's-Day,  F^b.  13.  At  Noon,  under  a  great  Degree  of 
Difcouragement ;  knew  not  how  it  was  poffible  for  me  to  preach 
in  the  Afternoon,  was  ready  to  give  up  all  for  gone  ;  but  God 
was  pleafed  to  afTift  me  in  fome  Mealure.  In  the  Evening,  my 
Heart  was  fweetly  drawn  ou<  after  God,  and  devoted  to  him. 

[  The  next  Day,he  had  Comfort  andDejeaion  intermingled.] 

Tuefday,  Feb.  15.  Early  in  the  Day  I  felt  fome  Comfort, 
afterwards  1  walked  into  a  neighbouring  Grove,  and  felt  more 
as  a  Stranaer  on  Earth,  I  think,  than  ever  before  ;  Dead  to  any 
of  the  Enjoyments  of  the  World  as  if  I  had  been  dead  in  a  na- 
turalSenfe.--IntheEvening,  had  divine  Sweetnefs  m  fecret 
Duty  !  God  was  the^i  my  Portion,and  my  Soul  rofe  above  thole 
di.^p  Waters,  into  which  I  have  funk  fo  low  of  kte  :—  My  Soul 
then  cried  for  '^ion,  and  had  Sweetnefs  m  fo  doing. 


62     Mt.  25.  Ue  LIFE 

[  This  fweet  Frame  continued  the  next  Morning  ;  but  after- 
wards  bis  inward  Diftrefs  returned.] 

Thurfday,  Feb.  17.  In  the  Morning,  found  my  felf  fomething 
comfortable,  and  refted  on  God  in  fome  Meafure.—  Preached 
thisDay  at  a  little  Village  belonging  ioEa/i- Hampton  ;  and  God 
was  pleafed  to  give  me  his  gracious  Prefence  and  Afliftance,  fo 
that  I  fpake  with  Freedom,  Boldnefs  and  fome  Power.  In  the 
Evening,  fpent  fome  Time  with  a  dear  Chriftian  Friend  ;  felt 
fweetly  ferious,  as  on  the  Brink  of  Eternity  ;  my  Soul  enjoyed 
SweStnefs  in  lively  Apprehenfions  of  ftanding  before  the  glorious 
God  :  prayed  with  my  dear  Friend  withSweetnefs,and  difcourfed 
with  utmoft  Solemnity.  And  truly  it  was  a  little  Emblem 
of  Heaven  it  felf.---  I  find  my  Soul  is  more  refined  and  weaned 
from  a  Dependance  on  my  Frames  and  fpiritual  Feelings. 

Friday, /v^.  18.  Felt  fomething  fweetly  moil  of  the  Day, 
and  found  accefs  to  the  Throne  of  Grace.  BlefTed  be  the  Lord 
for  any  Intervals  of  heavenly  Delight  and  Compofure,  while  I 
am  engaged  in  the  Field  of  Battle.  O  that  I  might  be  ferious, 
folemn  and  always  vigilant,  while  in  an  evil  World.  Had  fome 
Opportunity  alone  to  Day,  and  found  fome  Freedom  in  Study. 
G,.I  long  to //z;^ /fl  God. 

Saturday, /^pi*.  19.  Was  exceeding  infirm  to  Day,  greatly 
troubled  with  Pain  in  my  Head  and  Dizzinefs,  fcarce  able  to 
fit  up.  However,  enjoyed  fomething  of  God  in  Prayer,  and  per- 
formed fome  necefTary  Studies.  I  exceedingly  long  to  die,  and 
yet  through  divine  Goodncfs  have  felt  very  willing  to  live,  for 
two  or  three  Days  paft. 

Lord's-Day,  Feb.  20.  Was  fomething  perplexed  on  Account 
of  my  Carelefncfs  ;  J  thought  I  could  not  be  fuitably  concerned 
about  the  important  Work  of  the  Day,  and  fo  was  relilefs  with 
myEafinefs.— -  Was  exceeding  infirm  again  to  Day  ;  but  the 
Lord  flrengthcned  me,  both  in  the  outward  and  inward  Man,  fo 
that  I  preach'd  with  fome  Life  and  Spirituality,  efpccially  in  the 
Afternoon,  wherein  1  was  enabled  to  fpeak  clofely  againft  felfifh 
Religion,  that  loves  Chrift  for  his  Benefits,  but  not  for  himfelf. 

[  During  the  next  Fortnight,  it  appears  that  he  for  the  moft 
Part  enjoyed  much  fpiritual  Peace  and  Comfort.  In  his  Diary 
for  this  Space  of  Time,  are  exprcfled  fuch  Things  as  thefe  ; 
Mourning  over  indwellingSin  andUnprofitablenefs  ;  Deadnefs  to 
the  VVorld,  Longing  after  God  and  to  live  to  his  Glory,  Heart- 
melting  Defirts  after  his  eicmal  Home,  fix*d  Reliance  on  God 

for 


ef  Mr.  David  Brainerd.       A.D.  1 743 .     6^ 

for  his  Help,  Experience  of  much  divine'  Afllftance  both  in  the 
private  and  publick  Exercifesof  Religion  ;  inward  Strength  and 
Courage  in  theService  of  God,  very  frequent  Refrefhment,Con- 
folation  and  divine  Sweetnefs  in  Meditation,  Prayer,  Preaching, 
and  Chriftian  Conveifaiion.  And  it  appears  by  his  Account, 
that  this  Space  of  Time  was  filled  up  with  great  Diligence  and 
Earncftnefs  in  ferving  God, in  Study, Prayer, Meditation, Preach- 
ing, and  private  Inftru6ling  and  Counfelling.  ] 

Monday,  March  7.  This  Morning  when  I  arofe,  I  found  my 
Heart  go  forth  afterGod  in  longingDefires  ofConformity  tohira, 
and  in  fecret  Prayer  found  my  felf  fweetly  quicken*d  and  drawn 
out  in  Praifes  to  God  for  all  he  had  done  to  and  for  me,  and  for 
all  my  inward  Trials  and  Diftrefles  of  late  ;  my  Heart  afcribed 
Glory,  Glory,  Glory  to  the  blefled  God  I  AncJ  bid  Welcome 
all  inward  Diftrefs  again,  if  God  faw  meet  to  exercife  me  with 
it ;  Time  appeared  but  an  Inch  long,  and  Eternity  at  Hand  , 
and  I  thought  I  could  with  Patience  and  Chearfulnefs  bear  any 
Thing  for  the  Caufe  of  God  :— For  I  faw  that  a  Moment  would 
bring  me  to  a  World  of  Peace  and  Bleflednefs  ;  and  my  Soul,  by 
the  Strength  of  the  Lord,  rofe  far  above  this  lower  Woild,  and 
all  the  vain  Amufements  and  frightful  Difappointmcnts  of  it. 
Afterwards,  was  vifited  by  fome  Friends,  but  loft  fome  Sweet- 
nefs by  the  Means.  After  that,  had  fome  fweet  Meditation  on 
Gen.  v.  24.  Anl  Enoch  vsalked  with  God  &c.  ---  This  was  a 
comfortable  Day  to  my  Soul. 

[The  next  Day,  he  feems  to  have  continued  in  a  confidera- 
ble  Degreftof  Sweetnefs  and  P'ervency  in  Religion.] 

Wednefday,  March  c).  Endeavoured  t©  commit  my  felf  and 
all  my  Concerns  to  God.  Rode  16  Miles  to  Mantauk,  *  and 
had  fome  inward  Sweetnefs  On  the  Road  ;  but  fomething  of 
Flatncfs  &  Deadnefs  after  I  came  there  and  had  feen  the  Indians : 
I  withdrew,  and  endeavoured  to  pray,  but  found  my  felf 
awfully  deferted  and  left,  and  had  an  aiHicling  Senfe  of  my 
Vilenefs  and  Meannefs.  However,  I  went  and  preach*d  from 
Jfai. -WW.  10.  Had  fomp  AfTiftance  ;  and,  I  truft,  fomething 
of  the  divine  Prefence  was  among  us.  In  the  Evening,  again  I 
pray'd  and  exhorted  among  them,  after  having  had  a  Seafon 
alone,  wherein  I  v^as  fo  prefs'd  with  the  Blacknefs  of  my  Na- 
ture, that  I  thought  it  was  not  fit  for  me  to  fpeak  fo  much  as  tQ 
Indians, 


■*   Marttauk  is  the  Eaftern  Cape  or  End  of  L^ng-lfiand^  inha- 
bited chiefly  by  Indians,  [The 


64    ^/.  25,  The  LIFE 

[The  next  Day,  he  returned  to  Eaft-Hampion  ;  wa$exceed«^ 
ing  infirm  in  Body  through  the  remaining  Part  of  this  Week  ; 
but  fpeaks  of  AfTiftance  and  Enlargement  in  Study  and  religious 
Exercifes,  and  of  inward  Sweetnefs  and  breathing  after  God.] 

Lord's-Day,  March  13.  At  Noon,  I  thought  it  impoffible 
for  me  to  preach,  by  Reafon  of  bodily  Weaknefs  and  inward 
Deadnefs  ;  and  in  the  firft  Prayer,  was  fo  weak  that  I  could 
hardly  ftand  ;  but  in  Sermon,  God  ftrenthgned  me,  fo  that  I 
fpake  near  an  Hour  and  half  with  fweet  Freedom,Clearnefs,and 
fome  tender  Power,  from  Gen,  v.  24.  And  Enoch  walked  with 
God,  I  was  fweetly  aflifted  to  infift  on  a  clofe  Walk  with  God^ 
and  to  leave  This  as  my  parting  Advice  to  God*s  People  here, 
that  they  Jhould  walk  with  God.  May  the  God  of  all  Grace 
fucceed  my  poor  Labours  in  this  Place  ! 

Monday,  March  14.  In  the  Morning,  was  very  bufy  in  Pre- 
paration for  myjourney,  and  was  almoft  continually  engaged  in 
ejaculatory  Prayer.  About  ten,  took  Leave  of  the  dear  People 
of  Ea/l- Hampton.  MyHeaft  grieved  &  mourned,  and  rejoyced 
at  thefameTime,  rode  near  fiftyMiJes  to  aPart  of  Brook-Haven, 
and  lodged  therCjand  had  refrefhingConverfation  with  aChriftian 
Friend. 

[In  two  Days  more  he  reached  New-York  ;  but  complains  of 
m-uch  Defenion  and  Deadnefs  on  the  Road.  He  fiay'd  one 
Day  in  Nnu-Tork,  and  on  Friday  went  to  Mr.  Dickinfon's  at 
Elifabetb-Town.  His  Complaints  are  the  fame  as  on  the  two 
preceeding  Days.]  , 

Saturday,  March  19.  Was  bitterly  diftreflcd  under  a  Senfe 
of  my  Ignorance,  Darknefs  and  Unworihincfs ;  got  alone,  and 
poured  out  my  Complaint  to  God  in  the  Biiternefs  of  mySouL— 
In  the  Afternoon,  rode  to  Newark^  and  had  fome  Sweetnefs  in 
Convcrfation  with  Mr.  Burr^  and  in  Praying  together.  O  ! 
blefled  be  God  forever  and  ever,  for  any  enlivening  and  quick- 
ening. 

Lords- Day,  i'l/fi^i-/^  20.  Preach'd  in  the  Forenoon  .'-God 
gave  me  fome  Ainftance  andSweetnefs,  and  enabled  me  tofpeak 
with  real  Tendcrnefs,  J^ove  and  Impartiality.  In  the  Evening, 
preach'd  again  ;  and  of  a  Truth  God  was  pleafed  to  aflifta  poor 
Worm.  Blefled  be  God,  I  was  enabled  to  fpeak  with  Life, 
Power, and  pafTionate  Defire  of  the  Edification  of  God's  People, 
and  with  fome  Power  to  Sinners.  In  the  Evening,  I  felt  fome- 
thingfpiritual  and  watchful, left  my  Heart  fliould  by  any  Means 
be  diawn  away  from  God»     Qh,  whtjQ  fliall  J  c^Rie  to  that 

bbffed 


of  Mr,  David  Brainer.d.         1743.      ^s 

blcfled  World,  where  every  Power  of  my  Soul  will  be  incefTantly 
and  eternally  wound  up,  in  heavenly  Employments  and  Enjoy- 
ments, to  the  higheft  npgrc*?. 

[  On  Monday  he  went  to  JVoodbrtdgiy  where  he  fpeaks  of  his 
being  with  a  Number  of  Minifters  ;  *  and  the  Day  following 
of  his  travelling  part  of  the  Way  towards  iV<?tt;-2^ri,and  lodging 
at  a  Tavern  :  On  Wednefday,  he  came  to  New-Tor k :  On 
Thurfday,  he  rode  near  50  Miles,  from  ISlew-Tork  to  Norths 
CaftU  :  On  Friday,  went  to  Danbury  :  On  Saturday,  to  New- 
Milford :  On  the  Sabbath,  he  rode  5  or  6  Miles  to  a  Place  near 
Kent  in  ConneSiicut,  called  Scaticoh,  where  dwell  a  Number  of 
Indians,  ||  and  preached  to  them  :  On  Monday,  being  detained 
by  the  Rain,  he  tarried  at  Kent :  On  Tuefday,  he  rode  from 
Kent  to  Salfhury  ;  Wednefday,  he  went  to  Sheffield  :  Thurfday, 
March  31.  he  went  to  Mr.  Sergeant's  at  Stockbridge.  He  was 
dejedled  and  very  difconfolate,  thro'  the  main  of  this  Journey 
from  NeW'Jerfey  to  Stockbridge  s  and  efpecially  on  the  laftDay 
his  Mind  was  overwhelmed  with  an  exceeding  Gloominefs  and 
Melancholy.] 


*  Thefe  Minifters  were  the  Correfpondents,  who  now  met  at 
JVoodbridge^  and  gave  M.X.  Brainerd  new  Direflions,  2nd 
•inftead  of  fending  hira  to  thelndians  at  XhcFcrks  of  Delaware^ 
as  before  intended  •  they  ordered  him  to  go  to  a  Number 
of  Indians,  at  Kaunaumeek^  a  Place  in  the  Province  of  Neii- 
Tork^  in  the  Woods  between  Stockbridge  and  Albany.  This 
Alteration  was  occafioned  by  twoTbings,  viz.  i.  Informa- 
tion that  the  Correfpondents  had  received,  of  fome  Conten- 
tion now  fubfifting  between  the  white  People  and  the  Indi- 
ans atZ)^/tfK/3r^, concerning  their  Lands,  which  they  fuppo- 
fed  would  be  a  Hindrance  at  prefent  to  their  Entertainment 
of  a  Miflionary,  and  to  his  Succefs  amon^.  them.  And  2. 
Some  Intimations  they  had  received  from  Mr  Sergeant^ 
Millionary  to  the  Indians  at  Stockbridge^  concerning  the  In- 
dians at  Kaunaumeek^  and  the  hopeful  Profpe<5l  of  Succefs 
that  a  MifHonary  might  have  among  them. 

II  Thefe  v/erc  the  fame  Indians  that  Mr.  Brainerd  mention* 
in  his  Diary,  on  Aug,  12.  the  preceeding  Year. 


66    ^L  25.  Tbs  LIFE 


♦?! 


Part     V. 

From  his  jirfi  Beginning  to  inJlruB  the 
Indians  at  Kaunaumeek,  to  >6/V  Ordina- 
tion. 

FRiday,  Jpr'il  i,  1743.  I  rode  (o  ^tfanjizw^i,  near  twenty 
Miles  from  Stsckbridgey  where  the  Indians  live, with  whom 
I  am  concerned, and  there  lod^M  on  a  littleHeap  of  Straw  : 
was  greatly  exercifed  with  inward  Trials  and  DiftrefTes  all  Day  ; 
and  in  the  Evening,  my  Heart  was  funk,   and  J  feemed  to  have 
no  God  to  go  to.     O  that  God  would  help  me  ! 

[The  next  five  Days,  he  was  for  the  moft  Part  in  a  dejected 
depref^M  State  of  Mind,  and  fometimes  extreamly  fo.  Hefpeaka 
of  God's  IVavei  and  Billows  rolling  over  his  Soul ',  and  of  his 
beino-  ready  fometimes  to  fay,  Surely  his  Mercy  is  clean  gone  for 
ever,  and  he  will  be  favourable  no  more  ;  and  fays,  The  Anguifh 
he  endured,  was  namelefs  and  inconceivable  :  But  at  the  fame 
Time  fpeaks  thus  concerning  his  Diftrefles,  What  Godde/lgnsby 
alt  my  Diftrcffes  I  know  not  ;  hut  this  I  knew,  1  dsferve  them  all^ 
and  Thoufands  msre.—  He  givis  an  Account  of  the  Indians  kindly 
receivini^  him,  and  being  ferioufly  attentive  to  hisInftru£tions.J 

Fridav,  Jprilj-  Appeared  to  my  felf  exceeding  ignorant, 
weak,  helplefs,  and  unworthy,  and  ahogecher  unequal  to  my 
Work.  It  fcem'd  to  me,  I  (hould  never  do  any  b'ervice,  or 
have  any  Succefs  among  the  Indians.  My  Soul  was  weary  of 
my  Life  :  I  longed  for  Death,  beyond  Meafure.  When  I 
thought  of  any  godly  Soul  departed,  my  Soul  was  ready  tdenvy 
htrn  his  Privilege,  thinking,  O/;,  when  luill  my  Turn  come  / 
Aluj'i  it  be  Tmrs  frft  /---  But  I  know,  thofe  ardent  Defues,  at 
this  and  other  Times,  rofe  partly  for  Want  of  Rcfignation  to 
Go  1  tinder  allMifcries ;  and  fo  were  but  Impatience.  Towards 
Night,  I  had  (1  think)  the  Exercifis  of  Faith  m  Prayer, and  feme 
AfulUncc  in  Writing,     O  thai  G»J  would  keep  q^  near  him  ! 

Ffida;-, 


of  Kir,  David  Brainerd.      A  D.  1 7  43.     6y 

Friday,  April  8.     Was  exceedingly  prefs*d  under  a  .^enfe  of 
my  Pride ^Selfijhnefs^  Bitternefs^  and  Party- Spirit^  inTimes  p:;ft, 
while  I  attempted  to  promote  tiie  Caufe  of  God  :     It*s  vile  Na- 
ture and  dreadful  Confequences  appeared  in  fuch  odious  Colours 
to  me,  that  ray  very  Heart  was  pained  :    I  faw  how  poor  Souls 
ftumbled  over  it  into  everlafiing  Deflru6lion,  that  I   was  con- 
ftrained  to  make  ihat  Prayer  in  the  Bitternefs  of  my  Soul,  Q 
Lord^  deliver  me  from  Blood-Guiltinefs .     I  faw  my  Defert.of  Hell 
on  this  Account.      My  Soul  was  full  of  inward  Anguifh  and 
Shame  before  God,  that  I  had  fpcnt  fo  much  Time  in  Converfa- 
tion  tending  only  to  promote  a  Party-Spirit.     Oh,  I  faw  I  had 
not  faiiably  prized  Mortification,  Self-denial,  Refign^tion  under 
all  Advcrfities,     Mecknefs,  Love,    Candour,    and  Holintfs  06 
Heart  and  Life  :  And  this  Day  was  alraoft  wholly  fpent  in  fuch 
bitter  and  Soul-affli6ting  Reflections  on  my  paft   Frames  and 
ConducSl.— Of  late,I  have  thought  much  of  having  the  Kingdom 
of  Chrift  advanced  in  the  World  j  But  now  I  faw  I  bad  enough 
to  do  within  my  felf.     The  Lord  be  merciful  to  mc  a  Sinner, 
and  wafh  my  Soul. 

Saturday,  April  g.  Remained  much  in  the  fame  State  as 
Yefterday  ;  excepting  that  the  Senfe  of  my  Vilcnefs  was  not  fa 
quick  and  acute. 

Lord's-Day,  Jpril  10.  Rofe  early  in  the  Morning,  and 
walked  out,  and  fpent  confiderable  Time  in  the  Woods,  in 
Prayer  and  Meditation.  Preach'd  to  the  hdians^hoih  Forenoon 
andAfternoon.  They  behaved  foberly  in  general :  two  or  three 
in  particular  appeared  under  fome  religious  Concern  ;  with 
whom  I  difcourfed  privately  ;  and  one  told  me,  her  Heart  had 
cried y   ever  fince  Jhe  heard  me  preach  firji, 

[The  next  Day,   he  complains  of   much  Defcrtion.] 

Tuefday,  April  i2r  Was  greatly  opprefs'd  with  Grief  and 
Shame,  refle6i:ing  on  my  paft  Condudl,  my  Biilernefi  h  Party 
Xeal :  I  was  afiiamed,to  think  that  fuch  a  Wretch  as  I  had  ever 
preach'd  4---  Longed  to  be  excufcd  from  that  Work-  And 
when  my  Soul  was  not  in  Anguifli  and  keen  Diflrefs,  1  felt 
Senfelefs  as  a  Beajl  before  Gad^  and  felt  a  Kind  of  guikyAmufe- 
ment  with  the  leaft  Trifles  ;  which  f^ill  maintained  a  Kind  of 
ftifled  Horror  of  Confcience,  fo  that  I  could  not  reft  anj^  more 
than  a  condemned  Malefadtor. 

Wednefday,   April  \/^.  My  Heart  was  overwhelmed  within 
me  :  I  vgrily  thought  I  wa?  the  m^aneft,  vileft,  moil  helplcfs, 

K  %   ■  &'iilty. 


63      mt,is\  fre^   LIFE 

guilty,  ignorant,  benightncd  Creature  living.  And  yet  I  knew 
\yhat  God  had  done  for  my  Soul, at  thefameTime  :  Tho'  fome- 
times  I  was  .fiaulted  with  damping  Doubts  and  Fears,  whether 
it  was  poflibic  for  fuch  a  Wretch  as  I  to  be  in  a  State  of  Grace. 

ThurfJay,  April  14.  Remain'd  much  in  the  fame  State  as 
Yefterday, 

Friday,  April  15.  In  the  Forenoon,  very  difconfolate.  In 
the  Afrcrnoon.  preach'd  to  my  People,  and  was  a  little  encou- 
laged  in  {om^  Hopes  God  might  beftow  Mercy  on  their  Souls.— 
Felt  n^inefhing  refigned  to  God  under  all  Difpenfations  of  his 
Providence. 

Saturday,  April  16.  Still  in  the  Depths  of  Diftrefs.— In  the 
Affcrnoon,  preach'd  to  my  People  ;  but  was  more  difcouraged 
vi'ith  them  than  before  ;  fearM  that  ncfthing  would  ever  be  done 
for  them  to  any  happy EfFed.  I  retired  and  poured  out  my  Soul 
to  God  for  Mercy  ;  but  witfeout  any  fenfible  Relief.  Soon 
after,  came  an  Irifh-man  and  a  Dutch-man^  with  a  Defign,  as 
they  faid,  to  hear  me  preach  the  next  Day  ;  but  none  can  tell 
how  I  felt,  to  hear  their  profane  Talk.  Oh,  I  longed  that 
feme  dear  Chriftian  knew  my  Diftrefs.  I  got  into  a  Kind  of 
Hovel,  and  there  groan'd  out  my  Complaint  to  God  ;  and  withal 
felt  more  fenfible  Gratitude  and  Thankfulnefs  to  God,  that  he 
had  made  me  to  differ  from  thefe  Men,  as  I  knew  thro' Grace 
he  had, 

LordVDay,  April  17.  In  the  Morning  was  again  diftrefTcd 
^s  foon  as  I  waked,  hearing  much  Talk  about  the  World  and 
the  Things  of  it  :  Tho'  1  perceived  the  Men  were  in  fome 
Meafure  afraid  of  me  ;  and  I  difcourfed  fomcthing  about  fan^ti* 
fying  the  Sabbath,  if  poflible,  to  folemnize  their  Minds  :  But 
when  they  were  at  a  littleDift3nce,they  again  talked  freely  about 
fecular  Afl\--"rv  Oh,  I  thought  what  a /i/^//  it  would  be,  to 
Jive  vvith  fuch  .'vJen  to  Eternity  !  The  Lord  gave  me  fomeAfTift- 
ance  in  P.-eathing,  all  Day,  and  fome  Refignation,  and  a  fmall 
Degree  c;  Comfort  in  Prayer  at  Night. 

[  He  continued  in  this  difconfolate  Frame  the  ne^l'Day.] 

Tuefday,  /Ipril  iq.  In  <Y.z  Morning,  enjoyed  fome  fweet 
Rcpofc  and  Reft  in  God  ;  felt  fome  Strength  and  Confidence  in 
God  ;  and  my  Soul  was  in  fome  Meafure  refrcfli'd  and  com- 
forted. Spent  moft  of  the  Day  in  Writing,  and  had  fome  Ex- 
ercife  of  Grace  fcnilble  and  comfortaUle  ;  my  Soul  feem'd  lifted 
above  the  jiV^/Z/V./r'r.'j  wherein  it  has  been  fo  Ions  almoft  drow/isii ; 

felt 


Mt.^^^        e/ Mr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.1743,     69 

felt  fome  fpiritual  Longings  and  Breathings  of  Soul  .fter  God  ; 
found  my  felf  engaged  for  the  Advancenient  of  Cht: ft  s  .Cmg- 
dom  in-my°wnSou!,  more  than  in  others,   more  than  m  the 

Heathen  World*  ^       ,.      t-«  n*  j 

Wednefday,  ^i^nV  20.  Set  apart  this  Day  for  Faft.ng  and 
Praver  to  bow  my  Soul  before  God  for  the  Beftovvment  of  di- 
vine Grace  ;  efpecially  that  all  my  fpiritual  Amiaions  and  m- 
ward  DiftrefTes  might  be  fandificd  to  my  Soul.  And  endea- 
voured alfo  to  remember  the  Goodnefs  of  God  to  me  ^  the  Year 
part,  this  Day  being  my  5/W^-I)^y.  Having  ootained  Hc.p  of 
God,  I  have  hitherto  lived,  and  am  now  arrived  at  the  Age  ot 
2c  Years.  My  Soul  was  pained,  to  think  of  my  Barrennefs 
and  Deadnefs  /that  I  have  lived  fo  little  to  the  Glory  of  the 
eternal  God.  I  fpent  the  Day  in  the  Woods  alone,  and  there 
poured  out  my  Complaint  to  God.  O  ihat  God  would  enable 
me  to  live  to  his  Glory  for  the  future.  .     „     j,  , 

Thurfday,  April  21.  Spent  the  Forenoon  m  Readmg  and 
Prayer,  and  found  my  felf  fomething  engaged  ;  but  ftiH  much 
deprefs'd  in  Spirit  under  a  Senfe  of  my  Vilenefs  and  Unfirnefs 
{or  any  publick  Service.  In  the  Afternoon,  I  vifited  njy  Peo- 
ple, and  prayed  and  converfed  with  fome  about  their  SoulsCon- 
cerns :  and  afterwards  found  fome  Ardour  of  Soul  in  fecret 
Prayer.     O  that  I  might  grow  up  into  the  Likenefs  ot  God. 

Friday,  April  22.  Spent  the  Day  in  Study,  Reading  and 
Praver  ^  and  felt  a  little  relieved  of  my  Burden,  that  has  been 
fo  heavy  of  late.  But  ftill  in  fome  Meafure  opprefs'd  :  had  a 
Senfe  of  Barrennefs.  Oh,  my  Leannefs  teflifies  againfi:  me  I  My 
very  Soul  abhors  it  felf  for  it's  Unlikenefs  to  God,  it's  Inad.vity 
and  Slugf^ifhnefs.  When  I  have  done  all,  alas,  v/hat  an  un- 
frofitabie^Servani  am  I  !  My  Soul  groans,  to  fee  the  Hours  of 
the  Day  roll  away,  becaufe  I  don't  fill  them,  in  Spirituality 
and  Heavenly-Mindednefs.  And  yet  I  long  they  fhould  fpeed 
their  Pace,  to  haften  me  to  my  eternal  Home,  where  I  may  fall 
up  all  my  Moments,  thro'  Eternity,  for  God  and  his  Glory. 

'  [On  Saturday  and  LordVDay,  his  Melancholy  again  pre- 
vailed :  He  cried  out  of  his  Ignorance,  Stupidity,  and  Senfe- 
lefnefs;  while  yet  he  feems  to  have  fpent  the  Time  with  ut- 
moft  Diligence,  in  Study,  in  Prayer,  and  in  Infrruaing  and 
Counfelling  the  Indiam,  On  Monday,  he  funk  into  the  deepeft 
Melancholy  ;  fo  that  he  fuppofed  he  never  fpent  a  Day  in  iuch 
Diftrefs  in  his  Life  s  not  in  Fears  of  Hell,  (which,  he  fays,  he 
had  no  prcfling  Fear  of)  but  a  diftreiTing  Senfe  of  his  own  Vile- 


o    ^/.  26.  21&^  LIFE 


rcfs  &c.  On  Tuefday,  he  exprcfles  fome  Relief.  WcdneWay 
he  kept  as  a  Day  of  Fading  and  Prayer,  but  in  great  Diftrefs^! 
The  three  Days  next  following,  his  Melancholy  continued,  but 
in  a  lefTcr  Degree,  and  with  Intervals  of  Comfort.  *  ] 

Lord's- Day,  May  i.  Was  at  Siockbridge  to  Day.  In  the 
Forenoon  had  fome  Relief  and  AfTiftancc  ;  tho'  not  fo  much  as 
ufual.  In  the  Afternoon,  felt  poorly  in  Body  and  Soul ;  while 
I  was  preaching,  feemed  to  be  rehearfing  idle  Tales,  without 
the  leaft  Life,  Fervour,  Senfe,  or  Comfort  :  and  efpecially 
afterwards,  at  the  Sacrament,my  Soul  was  filled  withConfufion, 
and  the  utmoft  Anguifh  that  ever  I  endured,  under  the  Feeling 
of  my  inexpreiTible  Vilenefs  and  Meannefs  :  It  was  a  mofl  bitter 
and  diftrciTing  Seafon  to  me,  by  Reafon  of  the  View  I  had  of  my 
own  Heart,  and  the  fecret Abominations  that  lurk  there:  I  tho't 
the  Eyes  of  all  in  the  Houfe  were  upon  me,  and  I  dared  not  look 
any  One  in  the  Face  ;  for  it  verily  feem'd  as  if  they  faw  the  Vile- 
nefs of  my  Heart,  and  all  the  Sins  I  had  ever  been  guilty  of. 
And  if  i  had  been  banifhed  from  the  Prefence  of  all  Mankind  * 
never  to  be  feen  any  more,  or  fo  much  as  thought  of,  fiill  } 
fhould  have  been  diltrcfled  with  Shame  ;  and  I  (hould  have  been 
afhamed  to  fee  the  moft  barbarous  People  on  Earth,  becaufe  i 
was  viler,  and  feemingly  more  brutifhly  ignorant  than  they.  — 
1  am  made  to  pojfeft  the  Sins  of  my  Touih, 

[  The  remaining  Days  of  this  Week  were  fpent,  for  the  moft 
Part,  in  inward  Diflrefs  andGloominefs.  The  next  Sabbarh,  he 
had  Encouragement,  Afliftance  and  Ccmfo^rt ;  but  on  Monday 
funk  again.] 

Tuefday,  May  lo.  Was  in  the  fame  State,  as  to  my  Mind, 
that  I  have  been  in  for  fome  Time,  extremely  prefs'd  with  a 
Senfc  of  Guilt, Pollution,  Blindncfs  :  The  Iniquity  of  my  Heels  have 
compajjed  me  about  i  the  Sim  of  my  Touth  have  been  fet  in  order 
before  me  ;  (hey  h^\Q  gone  over  my  Head,  as  an  heavy  Burden^  too 
heavvfor  me  to  bear.  Almoft  all  the  Anions  of  myLife  paft  fcem 
to  be  cover'd  over  with  Sin  and  Guilt  ;  and  thofe  of  them  that  I 
performed  in  the  mofl  confcientious  Manner,  now  fill  me  with 
Shame5iConfurion,ihat  I  cannot  hold  up  myFace.  Oh  !  thePride, 
Seifi/hnefsyHypocri/y,  Ignorance, Bittirnefs^Party-Zeal.h  ihM'ant 


On  the  laft  of  thefe  Djys  he  wrote  the  firjf  Ltttsr  added  at 
the  End  of  this  Hiftory. 

of 


if  Mr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.1745;    71 

df  Love,  Candour,  Meeknefs  and  Gentlenefsjthat  have  attended 
my  Attempts  to  promote  Religion  and  Vertue  ;  and  this  when 
I  have  Reafon  to  hope  I  had  real  Afliftance  from  above,and  feme 
fweet  Intercourfe  with  Heaven  !  But  alas,  what  corrupt  Mixtures 
attended  my  beft  Duties  ! 

[  The  next  fcven  Days,  his  Gloom  and  Diftrefs  continued, 
for  the  moft  Part :  but  he  had  fome  Turns  of  Relief  and  fpiri- 
tual  Comfort.  He  gives  an  Account  of  his  fpending  Part  of  this 
Time  in  hard  Labour, to  build  himfelf  a  little  Cottage  to  live  in  a- 
mongft  the  Indians ^'m  which  he  might  be  by  himfelf ;  having  ( it 
feems)  hitherto  lived  with  a  poor''Scotch-Man,  as  he  obferves  in 
theLctter  jufl  now  refer'd  to  in  the  Margin  ;  and  afterwards, be- 
fore his  own  Houfe  was  habitable,  lived  in  a  Wigwam  among 
the  Indians.  ] 

Wednefday,  May  18.  My  Circumftances  are  fuch  that  I 
have  no  Comfort,  of  any  Kind,  but  what  I  have  in  God.  I  live 
in  the  moft  lonefom  Wildernefs  -,  have  but  one  fmgle  Perfon  to 
Converfe  with,  that  can  fpeak  Englijh  :  *  Moil  of  the  Talk  I 
hear.  Is  either  Highland- Scotch  or  Indian.  I  have  no  Fellow- 
Chriftian  to  whom  I  might  unbofom  my  felf,  and  lay  open  my 
fpiritual  Sorrows,  and  with  whom  I  might  take  fweet  Counfel 
in  Converfation  about  heavenly  Things, and  join  in  focial  Prayer. 
I  live  poorly  with  Regard  to  the  Comforts  of  Life  :  moft  of  my 
Diet  confilf s  of  boil'd  Corn,  Hafty-Pudding,  ^c,  I  lodge  on  a 
Bundle  of  StraWjand  myLabour  is  hard  and  extreamly  difficult  ; 
and  I  have  'little  Appearance  of  Succefs,  to  comfort  me.  The 
Indians  Affairs  are  very  difficult  5  having  00  Land  to  live  on,  but 
v/hat  the  Dutch  People  lay  Claim  to,  and  threaten  to  drive  them 
ofF  from  ;  they  have  noRegard  to  the  Souls  of  the  poor  Indians  ; 
and, by  what  I  can  learn,  they  hate  me,becaufe  I  come  to  preach 
to  'em.---  But  that  which  makes  all  my  Difficulties  grievous  to 
be  born,  is,  that  God  hides  his  Facefromme* 


*  This  Perfon  was  Mr.  Brainerd's  Interpreter ;  who  was  an 
i*igeniou6  young  Indian  bejonging  to  Stockbridge^  whofe 
Name  was  John  IVauwaumpequunnaunt ,  who  had  been  in- 
ftru6ted  in  the  Chrif^ian  Religion  by  Mr.  Sergeant  ;  and 
bad  lived  with  cheRcv.  Mr.  lyUliams  of  Long'Meadow,2ivA 
had  been  further  in[iru£led  by  him,  at  the  Charge  of  Mr. 
Hcllis  q{  /.^W^?2  5  and  underliood  both  Engllfi  inid  Indian 
.  ve/y  well,  and  wrote  a  good  Hand. 

Thuf  fd  3/, 


72     Mi.  26.  srii?   LIFE 

Thurfday,  May  rg.  Spent  moft  of  this  Day  in  clofe  Studies  i 
But  was  fomerimcs  {q  dift:refs*d,that  I  could  think  of  nothing  but 
my  fpiritual  Blindnefs,  Ignorance,  Pride,  and  Mifery,  Gh,  I 
have  Reafon  to  make  that  Prayer,  Lord,  forgive  my  Sins  ofToutby 
and  former  TrefpafTes  ! 

Friday,  May  20.  Was  much  perplexed, feme  Part  of  theDay ; 
but  towards  Night,  had  fome  comfortable  Meditations  on  Ifai, 
xl.  I.  And  enjoyed  fome  Sweetncfs  in  Prayer.  Afterwards  my 
Soul  rofe  fo  far  above  the  deep  IVateri^  that  I  dared  to  rejoyce  in 
God:  I  faw,  there  was  fufficient  Matter  of  Confolation in  the 
blefled  God. 

[  The  next  nine  Days,  his  Burdens  were  for  the  mofl  Part 
alleviated  ;  but  with  Variety  :  at  fome  Times  "having  confidera- 
bie  Confolation,  and  at  other  Times  more  deprefTed.  The  next 
Day,  Monday,  A'lay  30.  He  fet  out  on  ajourney  ioNew-Jerfey^ 
to  confult  the  Commifiioners  that  employed  him  about  the 
Affairs  of  his  MilTion  :  f  performed  his  Journey  thither  in  four 
Days  ;  and  ariived  at  Mr.  Burr's  in  Newark  on  Thurfday.  In 
great  Part  of  his  Journey,  he  was  in  the  Depths  of  Melancholy, 
lender  like  DiiittUcs  with  thofe  already  mentioned.  On  Friday, 
be  rode  10  ElifHbeth  Town  ;  and  on  Saturday  to  New-York  ;  and 
from  thence  on  his  way  Homewards  as  far  as  IVhite-Plaim  ; 
where  he  fpent  the  Sabbath,  and  had  confiderable  Degrees  of 
i^ivine  Comolaiion  andAfEftance  in  publick  Services.  On  Mon- 
day, he  rode  about  60  Miles  xoNew- Haven.  There  he  attempted 
a  Reconciliation  with  the  Authority  of  the  College-,  and  fpent 
this  Week  in  vifuing  his  Friends  in  thofe  Parts,  and  in  his  Jour- 
ney Homewards,  'till  Saturday,  in  a  pretty  comfortable  PVame 
of  Mind.  On  Saturday,  in  his  Way  from  Stockbridge  to  Kau- 
nauineek^  he  was  lofl  in  theWocds,  and  lay  all  Night  ija  the  open 
Air  ;  but  happily  found  his  Way  in  the  Morning,  and  came  to 
bis  Indians  onLord'j-Dav,  June  12.  And  had  greater  AfTif^ance 
in  Preaching  among  them  than  ever  beforc,fmce  his  lirft  coming 
among  them.] 


t  His  Bufincfs  with  (he  Commi/Ticners  now  was,  to  obtain 
Orders  (roni  thcni  to  fet  up  a  School  among  the  Indians  at 
Kautiaumeek,iT\^  tlat  his  interpreter  might  be  appointed  the 
School- Mail i; I'  :  Which  was  ^accordingly  done. 

From 


of  Mr.  D^vid  Brainerd.     A.D.  1 745.     73 

rFrom  ihisTime  forward  he  was  the  Subjed  of  variousFrames 
and  ExercifesofMind:  But  it  fecms    in  the  general    to  have 
been  with  him  much  after  the  fame  Manner  as  it  had  been  hi- 
thsrto  from  his  firft  coming  to  Kaunaumeek    ; i^\  he   got  nuo 
his  own  Houfe  (a  httlc  Hut,  that  he  made  chiefly  with  his  own 
Hands,with  long  and  hardLabour)  wh.eh  was  near  ^evenjeeks 
froni  this  Time.     Great  Part  of  this  Space  of  Time,  he  was  de- 
iedted  and  deprefTed  with  Melancholy,   and  fometimes  very  ex- 
trearaly  :  his  Melancholy  operating  in  like  Manner  as  has  been 
related  of  Times  part.     How  it  was  with  him  in  thofe  dark  Sea- 
fons,  he  hirafclf  further  defcribes  in  his  Diary  for  July  2.  in  the 
following  Manner.     My  Soul  island  has  for  a  hngjtme  been  in  a 
pitious  Candition.wading  ihro'  aSeries  of  Soy  rows,  of  vanoui Kinds. 
I  have  hem  fo  a  ufb'd  down  fometimes  mth  a  i>en/i  of  my  Meannejs 
end  infinite  Unworthinefs,   that  1  have  been  ajhamed   that  any  ^ven 
the  manefi  ofmyFelhw-Cresturesfioul^fo  much  as  fpenda  Thought 
cb4ut  me,^  have  wijh'd fometimes  while  I  have  traveled  among  tks 
thick  Brakes,   as  one  pf  thim,   to  drop  into  tverlajhni  Oblivion. 
In  this  Cafe,  fometimes,  I  have  almoji  rejolved  never  again  to  fee 
any  of  my  Acquaintance  ;  and  really  thought,  1  could  not  doit  and 
holdup   my  Face ',  and  have  longed  for  the  remoujl  Region,   for  a 
Retreat  from  all  my  Friends,  that  I  might  not  be  feen  or  heard  of  any 
more,'- Sometimes  the  Confideration  of  mylgnorance  has  heenaMeans 
of  my  s-reat  Di/iref  and  Anxiety,     And  efpecially  my  Soul  has  been 
in  Anguijh  withFear,  Shame,  and  Guilt,   that  ever  1  had  preach  d^ 
or  had  anyThought  tbatlVay,—  Sometimes  my  Soul  has  been  inDiJireJt 
en  feeling  feme  particular  Corruptions  rife  and  fwell  Uke  a  mtgbiy 
Torrent,  with  pnfent  Violence  ;  having  at  the  fame  Time,  tinThow 
fand  former  Sins  and  Follies  prefentedto  View,  in  all  their Blacknefs 
end  A^r^ravations.'-'  And  thefe  attended  with  fuch  external  Circum- 
fiancilasmine  at  prefent  are  ;  defiituteofmojiofthe  Conveniences  of 
Life,  and  1  may  fay,  of  all  the  Pleafures  of  it  ;  without  aFrtend  t$ 
communicate  any  of  my  Sorrows  to,  and  fometimes  withsutanyPlaa 
of  Retirement,  where  1  ma^i  unburden  my  Soul  before  God.which  has 
greatly  contributed  tomy  Dijlrefs,— Of  late,  more  efpecialh,  my 
great  Difficulty  has  been  a  Sort  of  Carelefnefs,  a  Kind  of  regardlejs 
Temper  of  Mind,  whence  J  have  been  difpofed  to  Indoience  and  In- 
fiing:  And  this  Temper  of  Mind  bai  cmfiantly  been  attended  witlj 
Guilt  and  Shame  ;  fo  that  fometimes  1  have  been  in  a  Kind  of 
Horror,^  to  find  my  feif  fo  unlike  tbe  bleffed  God  ;  and  have  ihsught 
J  grew  worfe  underbill  my  Trials  \  and  nothing  has  cut  and  wounded 
my  Soul  more  than  This,  Ob,  if  J  am  one  of  God's  chafen,  as  Itruft 
thro'  infinite  Grace  Im^  Jfisid  of  a  Truth,  that  the  righteous  are 
fcatccly  favf  d  I  k 


74    ^t.2e.  2-^5  LIFE 

/Tis  apparent  that  one  mainOccafion  of  that  diflrefJIngGloo- 
minefs  of  Mind  which  he  was  fo  much  exercifed  with  T^iKaunaw 
meek,  was  Rtfleaion  on  his  paft  Errors  and  mifguided  Zeal  at 
<>^/V,  in  the  Beginning  of  the  late  religious  Commotions  in 
the  Land.  And  therefore  he  repeated  his  Endeavours  this  Year 
for  Reconciliation  with  the  Governours  of  the  College,  whom 
he  had  in  that  Time  offended.  Ahho'  he  had  been  at  New- 
Haven  m  June,  this  Year,  and  had  attempted  a  Reconciliation, 
as  has  been  mentioned  already,  yet  in  the  Beginning  of  July,  he 
made  another  Journey  thither,  and  renewed  his  Attempt,  but 
Itill  ]n  V2in,  ^ 

Altho'  he  was  much  dejeaed,  great  Part  of  that  Space  of 
1  ime  that  I^ni  now  fpealcmg  of,  yet  there  were  many  Inter- 
miffions  of  his  Melancholy,  and  fome  Seafons  of  Comfo  rc  fweet 
Tranquillity  and  Refignation  of  Mind,  and  frequent  fpecial 
Afiilbnce  m  publick  Services,  that  he  fpeaks  of  in  his  Diary 
1  he  Manner  ot  his  Relief  from  his  Sorrow,  once  in  particular 
IS  worthy  to  be  mcnlion'd  in  his  own  Words,  in  his  Diary  for 
July  25,  whicli  are  as  follows  :  Had  Utile  orno  Refoluthnfor  a 
Life  of  Hohnefs;  was  ready  abnojl  to  renounce  my  Hotes  of  living 
io  God.      And  Oh  how  dark  it  looked,   to  think  cf  being  unholy   for 

'Z";{   ^^V  ■  ''''^'^""'  '"'^'''''   '^^'^  ^'y  'f  '^y  ^0^^  ^^^  that, 

P>/.lxv. 3. Iniquities  prevail  againf^  me.  But  was  in  fomeMea- 
jure  relieved  by  a  ccmfortable  A<Ieditaiion  on  God's  Eternity,  That  he 
never  had  a  Beginning,  kc.  Whence  1  was  led  to  admire  his  Great- 
re  fs  and  Power  kc,  in  fuch  a  Manner,  that  Ijioodjiill  b'  praised 
the  Lord  for  his  own  Glories  and  Perfe^ions  ;  tho'  1  was  [and 
if  1/hould  forever  be)  an  unholy  Creature,  my  Soul  was  comforted 
io  apprehend  an  eternal,  infinite,  powerful.  Holy  Go r,.-^ 

Saturday,  July '^0.  Juft  at  Night,  moved  into  mv  tfz^;»//^^/>, 
?nd  lodged  there  that  Night  ;  found  it  much  better  fpendine  the 
Time  alone  in  my  own  Houfc,  than  in  the  Ifigwam  wh?re  1 
was  before. 

LordVDay,  July  ^i^  Felt  more  comfortably  than  fomeDays 
palt.— Blehed  be  the  Lord,  that  has  now  given  me  a  Place 
of  Retirement.-  O  thit  I  might  find  God  in  it,  and  that  he 
would  dwell  with  me  for  ever. 

Monday,  Jug.  1..  Was  fliU  bufy  in  further  Labours  on  my 
Houfe.— Felt  a  httlc  of  the  Sweetnefs  of  Religion,  and  thought 
it  was  W'orth  the  while  to  fiodow  nfter  God  thro'  a  Thoufand 
$5nires.  Defarts,andDeath  it  k\L  O  that  i  might  always  follow 
fUfrHffhne/s,  that  i  ^ay  be  fpi]>confprmed    icGo^/  hU^ 


of  Mr,  David  Brainerd.       A.D^  743 :     75 

fome  Degree  of  Sweetnefs,  in  fccret  Prayer,  tho*  I  had  much 
Sorrow.  • 

Tuefday,  Aug,  2.  Was  ftill  labouring  to  make  my  felf  more 
comfortable  with  Regard  to  my  Houfe  and  Lodging.  Labour'd 
under  fpiritual  Anxiety  ;  It  feem'd  to  me,  I  defervtd  to  be 
kick'd  out  of  the  World  ;  yet  found  fome  Comfort  mcommitung 
my  Cauje  to  God,  'Tis  good  for  me  to  be  affliSied^  that  I  may  die 
wholly  to  this  World  and  all  that  is  in  it. 

Wednefday,  Aug,  3.  Spent  moft  of  the  Day  in  Writing. 
Enjoyed  fome  Senfe  of  Religion.  Thro*  divine  Goodnefs  I  am 
now  uninterruptedly  alone  ;  and  find  my  Retirement  comforta- 
ble. I  have  enjoyed  more  Senfe  of  divine  Things  within  a  few 
Days  laft  paft,  than  for  fomeTime  before.  I  longed  after  Holi- 
nefs5Humility&  Meeknefs  :  O  thatGod  would  enable  me  to  pafi 
the  Time  of  my  fojourning  here  in  his  Fear^  and  always  live  to  him, 

Thurfday,  Aug.  4.     Was  enabled  to  pray  much,   thro'  the 

wholeDay  ;  and  thro*  divine  Goodnefs  found  fome  Intenfenefs 

of  Soul  in  the  Duty,  as  I  ufed  to  do,  anr'  fome  Ability  to  perfe- 

vere  in  my  Supplications :   Had  fome  Apprehenfions  of  divine 

Things,  that  were  engaging, and  that  gave  me  fome  Courage  and 

Rcfoiution.    ^Tis  good,  I  find,  to  per  fever  e  in  Attempts  to  pray, 

if  I  can't  pray  with  Perfeverance^  i.  e.  continue  long  in  my  Ad- 

drefles  to  the  divincBeing.  I  have  generally  found,  that  the  more 

I  do  in  fecret  Prayer,  the  more  I  have  delighted  to  do,  and  have 

enjoyed  more  of  a  Spirit  of  Prayer  ;  and  frequently  have  found 

the  contrary,   when  with  Journeying  or  oiherwife,  I  have  been 

much  deprived  of  Retirement.     A  fcafonable  fleadyPerformance 

of  fecret  Duties  in  their  proper  Hours, &  a  careful  Improvement 

of  all  Time,  filling  up  every  Hour  with  fome  profitable  Labour, 

either  of  Heart, Head, or  Hancls,  are  excellent  Means  o   fpiritual 

Peace  and  Boldnefs  before  God.   Chri/i   indeed  is  our  Pence^  and 

by  him  we  have  Boldnefs  of  Accef,  to  God  -,   but  a  good  Covfcience^ 

void  of  Offence^  is  an  excellent  Preparation  (or  an  Approach  into 

the  divine  Prefence.     There  is  Difference  between  Self-Confix 

dence  and  a  Self-righteous  pteafmg  ourfelves  (wi^h  our  ownDuiies, 

Attainments,  and  fpiritual  Enjoyments)  wh'.ch  godlySouIs  fome- 

times  are  guilty  of,    and  that   holy  Confidence  arifmg  from  the 

Teftimony  of  a  good  Confcience,   which  j^cod.  Hezekiah  had 

when  he  fays.   Remember y   O  Lord^  1  beleech   Thee^  hoiu  1  have 

walkea  before  thee  in  Truth  and  with  aperfe£i  Hiart.     Then  (fays 

the  holy  Pfalmift)  fl^all  1  not  be  o/}jamed,  whtn  J  have  RejpeU  to 

all  thy  Commondments.     Filling  up  our  Time  with  and/i?r  God 

is  the  Way  to  lifc  up  and  lie  down  in  Peace. 

L  2  [The 


fo    Mt,  26,  2^^  LIFE 

[  The  next  eight  Days,  he  continued  for  the  moff  Part  in  t 
very  comfortable  Frame,  having  his  Mind  fixed  and  fweetly  en- 
gaged in  Religion  ;  and  more  than  once  blcfl"es  God, that  he  had 
given  him  a  VaihCoitagg,  where  he  might  live  alone,  and  enjoy 
a  happy  Retirement,  free  from  Noife  and  Difturbance,  and 
Cfculd  at  any  Hour  of  the  Day  lay  afide  all  Studies,  and  fpend 
Time  in  lifting  up  his  Soul  to  God  for  fpiritual  BJeflings.] 

Saturday,  Jug,  13.  Was  enabled  in  fecretPrayer  to  raife  my 
Soul  to  God,  with  Defire  and  Delight.  It  was  indeed  a  blefTed 
Seafon  to  my  Soul  :  I  found  the  Comfort  of  bting  a  Chriftian  ; 
J  counted  the  Sufferings  ef  the  prefent  Life  not  worthy  to  he 
compared  with  the  Glory  of  divine  Enjoyments,  even  in  this 
World.  All  my  paft  Sorrows  feemed  kindly  to  difappear, 
and  I  remembred  no  rnore  the  Sorrow ^  for  Jey  -—  O,  how  kindly ,» 
and  with  what  a  filial  Tendernefs,  the  Soul  hangs  on,  and  con- 
fides in  the  Rock  of  Jges,at  fuch  a  Seafon,  that  he  will  never  leave 
it  nor  for  fake  it,  that  he  will  caufe  all  Things  to  work  together 
for  iti  Good,  ^c  !  I  longed,  that  others  fhould  know  how 
good  a  God  the  Lord  is.  My  Soul  was  full  of  Tendernefs  and 
Love,  even  to  the  moft  inveterate  of  my  Enemies :  I  longM 
ihey  (hould  (hare  in  the  fame  Mercy.  1  loved  and  longed 
that  God  fhould  do  juft  as  he  pleafed,  with  mc  and  every 
Thing  elfe.  I  felt  exceeding  ferious,  calm  and  peaceful, 
»nd  encouraged  to  prcfa  after  Holinefs  aj  long  as  I  live,  whatever 
Di  nculties  and  Trials  may  be  in  my  Way.  May  the  Lord 
always  help  me  fo  to  do  ;    /fmen,  and  Jmen  ! 

Lord's- Day,  Jug.  14.  I  had  much  more  Freedom  in  publick, 
than  in  private.  God  enabled  me  to  fpeak  with  feme  feeling 
Senfc  of  divine  Things  ;  but  perceived  no  confiderable  Efted. 

Mcjnday,  Jug.  15.  Spent  moft  of  the  Day  in  Labour  to  pro- 
cure fomething  to  keep  my  Horfe  on  in  the  Winter. --Enjoyed 
not  much  Sweetnefs  in  th.^  Morning  :  Was  very  weak  in  Bcdy, 
through  the  Day,  and  tho*t  this  frail  Body  would  foon  drop 
into  ibcDait  :  Had  feme  very  lealizingApprchcnfionsof  a  fpeedy 
Entrance  into  another  World.  And  in  this  weak  State  of 
Body,  was  not  a  iiale  diltrelTed  for  want  of  fuitablc  Food.  Had 
no  Bread ,  nor  could  I  get  any.  I  am  forced  to  go  or  fend  ten  or 
firteer.  Miles  for  all  the  Bread  I  eat  ;  and  fometimcs  'tis  mouldy 
and  foure,  before  I  eat  ir,  if  1  gc:  any  confiderable  Qiiantity  : 
And  then  again  I  have  none  for  fomc  Days  together,  for  want 
of  an  Opportunity  to  fend  for  it,  a«d  cai/t  find  my  Horfe  in 
ths  VVooc's  to  go  my  feU  ;  and  this  was  my  Cafe  now:  B\At 
t%r<i*  divmc  ^Qodflcfs  I  had  feme  Indian  Meal^  of  which  I 

made 


5/ -Mr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1743."     77! 

made  \Mt  Cakes,  and  fried  them.  Yet  felt  contented  with  my 
Circumftances,  and  fweetly  refigned  to  God.  In  Prayer  I  en- 
toyed  great  Freedom  ;  and  blefsM  God  as  much  for  my  prcfent 
Circumftances,  as  if  I  had  been  a  King  ;  and  thought,  I  found 
a  Difpofition  to  be  contented  in  any  Circumftances :    Klelicd  be 

God  !  ,.  1  .    T»  J 

TThe  reft  of  this  Week,  he  was  exceeding  weak  m  Body, 
and  much  exercifed  with  Pain  ;  and  yet  obliged  from  Day  to 
Day  to  labour  hard,  to  procure  Fodder  for  his  Horfe  ;  except- 
ing fome  Part  of  the  Time  he  was  fo  very  ill,  that  he  was  neither 
able  to  work  nor  ftudy  :  But  fpeaks  of  Longings  afterHolinefs  and 
perfea  Conformity  to  God  ;  complains  of  enjoying  butlitde 
of  God  ;  yet  fays,  That  Utile  was  better  to  him,  than  all  the 
fForUhkides,  In  his  Diary  for  Saturday,  he  fays,  He  was- 
fomething  Melancholy  and  forrowful  in  Mind  ;  and  adds,  / 
never  feel  comforiabty,  but  when  1  find  my  Soul  going  forth  after 
God  :  Jf  leant  he  holy,   1  muft  netfjfarily  he  ml fer  able  for  ever. ^ 

Lord's-Day,  Aug,  21.  Was  much  ftraiten*d  in  theForenoon- 
Exercife  :  my  Thout;hts  feem*d  to  be  all  fcatter'd  to  the  Ends 
of  the  Earth/  At  Noon,  I  fell  down  before  the  Lord,  and 
groan'd  under  my  Vilenefs,  Barrenncfs,  Deadncfs,  and  felt  as  if 
I  was  guilty  of  Soul-Murther,  in  fpeaking  to  immortal  Souls  in 
fuch  a  Manner  as  I  had  then  done.—  In  the  Afternoon,  God 
was  pleas'd  to  give  me  fome  AfTif^ance,  and  I  was  enabled  to 
fct  before  my  Hearers  the  Nature  and  NeceiTity  of  true  Repea- 
tance,  ^c.  Afterwards  had  ferae  fmall  Degree  of  Thankfulnefs. 
Was  very  ill  and  full  of  Pain  in  the  Evening  ;  and  my  Soul 
mourned  that  I  had  fpent  Co  much  Time  to  fo  little  Profit. 

Monday,  Aug,  22.  Spent  mofl  of  the  Yy^y  in  Study  ;  and 
found  my  bodily  Strength  in  a  Meafure  reftored.  Had  ibme 
inrenfe  and  paiTionat^  Breathings  of  Soul  after  Holinefs,  and 
very  clear  Manifelhtions  of  my  utter  inability  to  procure,^  or 
work  it  in  my  fcif ;  'tis  wholly  owing  to  the  Power  of  God. 
O,  with  what  Tenderncfs  the'  Love  and  Defire  of  ^Holinefs 
fills  the  Soul  I  I  wanted  to  v;irig  cut  of  my  felf,  to  God  ;  or 
rather  to  get  a  Conformity  to  Kim  :  But  alas,  1  can't  add  to  my 
Stature  in  Grace  one  Cubit.  .  However,  my  Soul  can  never 
leave  ftriving  for  it  ;  or  at  leaft  groaning,  that  it  can't  ftrive 
for  it,  and  obtain  more  Purity  of  Heart.  —  At  Night,  I  fpent 
fomsTime  in  inftruding  my  poor  People  :  Oh, that  God  would 
pity  their  Souls. 

Tuefday,  >fa^.  23.  Studied  in  the  Forenoon,  and  enjo)'d 
fome  Freedom. "  lo  the  Afternoon,  Ubgured  Abroad  :    Eudea- 

vouitd 


78      ^/.  25.  r.^^  L  I  F  E 

youred  to  pray  mtich  ;  but  found  not  much  Sweetnefs  or  In- 
tenfeneis  of  Mind  Towards  N.ght,  was  very  weary,  &  tir'd 
of  th.s  \A/orId  of  Sorrow  :  The  Thoughts  of  Death  &  Immor- 
tality  appeared  very  defi  able,and  even  refrefh'd  my  Soul.  Thofe 
1-ines  turned  in  my  Mind  with  Pleafurc, 

CcTTii,  Death,  ftjoke  Hands  -,  VR  kifs  thy  Bands  : 
Tis  ticpptnefs  for  im  to  die. 
What  !  Do'li  thou  think,  that  Iwilljhrinkf 
lUgo  to  Immorialiiy, 

In  Evenin^-Praycr,  God  ;yas  pleafed  to  draw  near  my  Soul, 
tho  very  finful  and  unworthy:  Was  enabled  to  wreftle  with 
Crod  and  to  perfev.re  in  my  Requefts  for  Grace  •  I  noured  out 
my  Soul  for  all  the  World,  Friends  and  Enemies.  '  My  SouS 
w.s  concerned,  not  fo  much  for  Souls  as  fuch,  but  rather  for 
^.hrilt  s  Kingdom,  that  it  might  appear  in  the  World,  that  God 
mightbeknown  to  be  God,  in  the  whole  Earth.  And  Oh  mv 
Soul  abhor'd  the  vervThought  of  a  Party  in  Religion  !  Let  the 
1  ruth  of  God  appear,  wherever  it  is  ;  and  God  have  theGlory 
tor  ^ ever,  y/;;2^/7.  7  h,s  was  indeed  a  comfortable  Seafon  •  I 
tho  t  I  had  fome  fmill  Talte  of,  and  real  Relifh  for  the  Enjoy- 
ments and  Employments  of  the  upper  World.  O  that  mySoul 
was  more  attemper'd  to  it. 

Wednefday,  Jug,  24.  Spent  fome  Time,  in  the  Morning,Ln 
btudy  and  f  rayer.  Afterwards,  was  engaged  in  fome  necefTary 
buhnefs  Abroad.  7^owards  Night,  found  a  littleTime  for  feme 
particular  Studies.  I  thought,  if  God  fhould  fay,  Ceafe  making 
miv  Provtfionfcr  this  Life,  for  you /hall  in  a  few  'Days  go  cut  of 
Itme  into  Eternity,  my  Soul,  would  leap  for  Joy.  O  that  I  may 
both  d.fire  to  h,  diffhlved  to  be  with  Chrift^  and  likewife  wait  pati- 
ently all  the  Dayi  of  my  appointed  Time  UiU  my  Change  co?ne.—E\xt 
a^as    I  am  very  uiJit  for  the  Bufmefs  &  BlefTednefs  pf  Heaven.— 

0  for  more  Holinefs. 

Thurfday,  ^//..  25.   Part  of  the  D^^v,  engaged  in  Studies  ; 
and  part,  in  Labour  Abroad.      I  find,    'tis  impc.mb'e  to  enjoy 
f3^^  ^""^  Tr'nquiliiiy  of  Mind  wiihout  a  careful  Improvement 
nr    '^^'  ''  '""'''^'^  ^"  Imicat'ion  of  Ged  and  Lhrift  Jefus  : 

My  I^atherivorketh  hitherto,  and  Iwofk,  fays  cur  Lord.  But 
ftill,  if  we  would  be  like  God,'  we  muit  fee  that  we  fill  up  our 

1  inie  for  him.--  I  daily  long  fo  dwell  in  perfe^  Light  &  Love. 
Jn  the  mean  T.-me  my  Soul  mourn?,  that  1  make  fo  lirtle  Pro- 
grels  in  Grace  ::nd  Prep:uation  for  the  World  of  BlefTcdnefs  :  I 
U%  and  know  cnat  i  m\  a  very  b.ipren  Tree  in  '^od's  Vineyard, 

and 


of  Mr,  David  Bralnerd.     A.D.  1743.     79 

and  that  he  might  juftly  fay.  Cut  it  down  &c.  O  that  God 
would  make  me  more  lively  and  vigorous  in  Grace,  for  his  own 
Glory  !     Amen, 

[The  two  nextDays,  he  was  much  engaged  in  feme  neceiTary 
Labours,  in  which  heextreamly  fpent  himfeif.  He  feems5tbere 
Days  to  have  had  a  great  Senfe  of  the  Vanity  of  the  World  ; 
and  continued  Longings  after  Holinefs,  and  more  Fervency  of 
Spirit  in  the  Service  of  God.] 

Lord's-Day,  Aug,  28.  Was  much  perplex'd  with  fome  irre- 
ligious Dutch-men.  All  their  Difcourfe  turned  upon  theThings 
of  the  World  :  which  was  no  fmall  Exercife  to  my  Mind.  Oh, 
what  a  Hell  it  would  be  to  fpend  an  Eternity  with  fuch  Men  ! 
Well  mighWavid  fay,  1  beheld  theTranfgrfffors,^  was  griived," 
But,  adored  be  God,  Heaven  is  a  Place,  into  which  no  unclean 
Thing  enters.  Oh,  I  long  for  the  Holinefs  of  that.Worid  !  Lord, 
prepare  me  therefor. 

[The  next  Day,  he  fet  out  on  a  Journey  to  New-Tork.  Was 
fomething  dejeded,  the  two  firft  Days  of  his  Journey  ;  but  yet 
feems  to  have  enjoyed  fome  Degrees  of  the  fenfible  Prefence  of 
God.] 

Wcdnefday,  Aug,  31.  Rode  down  to  Bethlehem  :  Was  in  a 
Tweet,  ferious,  and,  I  hope,  Chriftian  Frame,  when  I  came 
there  ;  Eternal  Things  engrofs'd  all  my  Thoughts  ;  and  I  long*d 
to  be  in  the  World  of  Spirits.  O  how  happy  is  it,  to  have  all 
our  Thoughts  fwallowed  up  in  that  World  ;  to  feel  one's  felf  a 
ferious  confiderate  Stranger  in  this  World,  dihgently  feeking  a 
Road  tbro'  it,  the  bcfl,  the  fure  Road  to  the  heavenly  Jeru-^ 
falem  ! 

Thurfday,  Ssptemb,  i.  Rode  to  Danbury,  Was  more  dull 
and  dejedted  in  Spirit,  than  Yefterday.  Indeed,  I  always  feel 
comfortably,  when  God  realizes  Death  and  the  Things  of  ano- 
ther World  to  my  Mind  :  Whenever  my  Mind  is  taken  ofF 
from  the  Things  of  this  World,  and  fet  on  God,  my  Soul  is 
then  at  Reji, 

[He  went  forward  on  his  Journey,  and  came  toNew-Totk  on 
the  next  Monday.  And  after  tarrying  there  two  or  threeDays, 
fet  out  from  theCity  towirdsNew- Haven,  intending  to  be  there 
at  the  Commencement -5  and  on  Friday  came  to  Horfe-Neck. 

In 


to    Mt.  26.  The  LIFE 

In  the  mean  Time,  he  complains  much  of  DuJnefs,  and  Want 
of  Fervour  in  Religion  :  But  yet  from  Time  (o  Time,  fpeaka 
of  his  enjoying  fpiritual  VVarmth  and  Sweetnefs  in  Converfation 
with  Chriftian  Friends,  Afliftance  in  pubjick  Services,  ^c] 

Saturday,  Sept.  10.  Rode  fix  Miles  to  Stanwich^  and  preach *d 
to  a  confiderable  A/Tembly  of  People.  Had  Tome  AfTiftance 
and  Freedom,  efpecially  towards  the  Clofe.  Endeavoured  much 
afterwards,  in  private  Converfation,  to  eflablifh  Holiacfs,  Hu- 
mility, Meeknefs  ^c.  as  the  Eflence  of  true  Religion  ;  and  to 
moderate;  feme  noify  Sort  of  Perfons,  that  appeared  to  me  to  be 
a£led  by  unfeen  fpiritualPride.  Alas,whatExtreams  Men  incline 
to  runinto  !— Returned  io Horfe-NeckyZnd  felt  fome  Serioufnefs 
and  fweet  Solemnity  in  the  Eveaing. 

Lord's-Day,  Sept,  11.  In  the  Afternoon,  preach'd  from 
T/'/w  iii.  8.  I  think,  God  never  helped  me  more  in  painting  out 
true  Religion,  and  in  detecting  clearly,  and  tenderly  difcountc- 
nancingfalfe  Appearances  of  Religion,  Wild-fire  Party- Zeal, 
fpiritual  Pride,  ^c,  as  well  as  a  confident  dogmatical  Spirit, and 
it's  Spring,  viz.  Ignorance  of  the  Heart>--  In  the  Evening, 
took  much  Pains  in  private  Converfation  to  fupprefs  fome  Con- 
fufions,  that  I  perceived  were  amongft  that  People. 

Monday,  Sept,  12.  Rode  to  Mr.  MiUi's  at  Ripton.  Had 
fome  perplexing  Hours ;  but  was  fbme  Part  of  the  Day  very 
comfortable.  'Tis  through  great  Trials ^  I  fee,  that  we  muji  enter 
the  Gates  cf  Paradjfe,  If  my  Soul  could  but  be  Holy,  that  God 
might  not  be  difhonoured,  methinks,  I  could  bear  Sorrows. 

Tuefday,  Sept.  13.  Rode  to  New- Haven.  Was  fometiraes 
dejedled  ;  not  in  the  fweeteft  Frame.  Lodged  at  ****.  Had 
fome  profitable  Cliriftian  Converfation,  ^c.—l  find,tho*  my  in- 
ward Trials  are  great,  and  a  Eife  of  Solitude  gives  'em  greater 
Advantage  to  fettle  and  penetrate  to  the  very  iomoft  Receflts  of 
the  SoLil  j  yet  'tis  better  to  be  alone,  than  incumber'd  withNoife 
and  Tumult.  I  find  it  very  difficult  maintaining  any  Senfe  of 
divime  Things,  while  removing  from  Place  to  Place,  diverted 
with  new  Objc(Sfs,  and  filled  with  Care  and  Bufinefs.  A  fettled 
ifeady.Bufinefs  is  befl  adapted  to  a  Life  of  ftrid  Religion. 

VVednefday,  Sept.  14.  This  Day  I  ought  to  have  taken  my 
Degree  I  *  but  God  fees  fit  to  deny  it  me.  And  the' I  was 
greatly  afraid  of  being  overwhelmed  with  Perplexity  and  Ccn- 
fi'.fion,  when  I  fliould  fee  my  Clafs- Mates  take  theirs ;  }ct,  in 


This  being  Commencement  Day, 

(he 


of  Mr,  David  Brainerd.      A.D.  1 743.     8 1 

the  very  Seafon  of  It,  God  enabled  me  with  Calmnefs  and  Re- 
fignation  to  (zy^Thelf^illofthe  Lord  b^  done-  Indeed,  thro*  divine 
Goodnefs,  I  have  fcarcely  felt  my  Mind  fo  calm,  fedate,  and 
comfortable  for  fome  Time.  I  have  long  fear'd  this  Seafon,  and 
expeded  my  Humility,  Meeknefs,  Patience  and  Refignation 
would  be  much  tried  f  :  But  found  much  more  Pleafure  and 
divine  Comfort,  than  I  expefled.—  Felt  fpiritually  Serious,  ten- 
der and  AfFeaionate  in  private  Prayer  with  a  dear  Chriftian 
Friend  to  Day. 

Thurfday,  Sept.  15.  Had  fome  Satisfadlion  in  hearing  the 
Minifters  difcourfe  ^c.  'Tis  always  a  Comfort  to  me,  to 
hear  religious  and  fpiritual  Difcourfe.  O  that  Minifters  and 
People  were  more  fpiritual  and  devoted  to  God,—-  Towards 
Night,  with  the  Advice  of  Chriftian  Friends,  I  offered  the  fol- 
lowing Reflections  in  Writing,  to  the  Re^or  and  Tru/iees  of  the 
College  (  which  are  for  Subttance  the  fame  that  I  had  freely  of- 
fered to  the  ReSfor  before,  and  intreated  him  to  accept)  and  this 
I  did  that  if  pofTible  I  might  cut  ofFallOccafion  of  Stumbling  and 
OfFence,  from  thofe  that  feek  Occafion.  What  I  offered,  is 
as  follows.  • 

«'  Whereas  I  have  faid  before  feveralPerrons,concernI1hg  Mr. 
<'  JVhittelJeyy  one  of  the  Tutors  of  Yale-College^  that  J  did  not 
«'  believe  he  had  any  more  Grace^than  theChair  2  then  Uan'd  upon  5 
*«  I  humbly  confels,  that  herein  I  have  fmM  agairift  God,  and 
<'  a<Sted  ^contrary  to  the  Rules  of  his  Word,  and  have  injured 
"  Mr.  IV hi  tt  el  fey.  I  had  no  Rig^t  to  make  thus  free  with  his 
*«  Charader  ;  and  had  no  juftReafon  to  fay  as  I  did  concerning 
««  him.  My  Fault  herein  was  the  more  Aggravated,  in  that  I 
"  faid  this  concerningOne  that  was  fo  mach  mv  Superiour,  and 
««  one  that  I  was  obliged  to  treat  with  fpecial  Refpe£t  and  Ho- 
<«  nour,  by  Reafon  of  the  Relation  I  ftood  in  to  him  in  the 
<<  College.  Such  a  Manner  of  Behaviour,  I  confefs,  did  not 
*'  become  a  Chriftian  ;  it  was  taking  too  much  upon  me,  and 


His  Trial  was  the  greater,  in  that,  had  it  not  been  for  the 
Difpleafure  of  the  Governou.  s  of  the  College, he  would  not 
only  on  that  Day  have  fhared  with  his  Clafs-Maies  in  the 
publick  Honours  which  tkey  then  received,  but  would  on 
that  Occafion  have  appeared  at  the  Head  of  that  Oafs  ; 
which,  if  he  had  been  with  them,would  have  been  the  mofl 
numerous  of  any  that  ever  had  been  graduated  at  that 
College.  ' 

M  <^i^ 


82       ^/.25.  Tb^   LIFE 

««  did  not  favour  of  that  humble  Refpefl,  that  I  ought  to  ha^e 
''  exprefs'd  towards  Mr.  fVhittefey.  1  have  long  fince  been 
'«  convinced  of  the  Falfenefs  of  thofc  j^pprchenfions^  by  which  I 
«'  then  juftified  fach  a  Condud,  I  have  often  refleftcd  on  this 
<«  Ad  with  Grief;  I  hope,  on  Account  of  the  Sin  oiii: 
««  And  am  willing  to  lie  low,  and  beabafed  beforcGod  andMan 
<«  for  it.  And  humbly  afk  the  Forgivenefs  of  the  Governours 
<'  of  the  College,  and  of  the  whole  Society  ;  but  of  Mr.  Jf^hit- 
"  te]fey  in  particular.  And  whereas  I  have  been  accufed  by  one 
<<  Perfon  of  faying  concerning  the  Rev.  ReSlcr  of  YaJe-CoHege^ 
* '  that  /  wondered  he  did  not  expeif  to  drop  down  dead  for  fininv 
<«  tkeSchokrs  thjt  followed  Mr.Tcnneni  to  Milford  ;  1  ferioufly 
<«  profefs,  that  I  don't  remember  my  faying  any  Thing  to  this 
««  Purpofe.  But  if  I  did,  which  I  am  not  certain  I  did  not,  I 
<'  utterly  condemn  it,  and  dete/^  all  fuch  Kind  of  Behaviour  ; 
<«  and  efpecially  in  an  Undergraduate  towards  the  Redor.  And 
*■  I  now  appear,  to  judge  and  condemn  my  felf  for  going  once  to 
«'  ihe  feparate  Adeeting  in  New-Haven,  a  little  before  I  wasex- 
*'  pell'd,  tho^  the  Rc£for  had  refufed  to  give  me  Leave.  For  this 
V  1  k^mbly  afk  the  Rector's  Forgivenefs.  And  whether  the 
«'  Governours  of  the  College  (hall  ever  fee  Caufe  to  remove 
«'  the  Academical  Cenfure  I  lie  under,  or  no,  or  to  admit  me 
<«  to  the  Priviledges  I  defire  ;  yet  I  am  willing  to  appear,  if 
*«  they  think  fit,  openly  to  own,  and  to  humble  my  felf  for 
««  thofe  Things  I  have  herein  confefs'd." 

God  ha?  made  ms  v»'illing  to  do  any  Thing,  that  I  can  do, 
confiftent  with  Truth,  for  the  Sake  of  Peace,  and  that  I  might 
not  be  a  Stumbling-block  and  OfFence  to  ethers.  For  thisRea- 
fon  I  can  cheerfully  forego,  and  give  up  what  I  verily  believe, 
after  the  moft  mature  and  impartial  Search,  is  my  Right, in  fome 
Infhnces.  God  has  given  me  that  Difpofition,  that  if  thi^  were 
the  Cafe,  that  a  Man  has  done  nie  an  hundred  Injuries^  and  I 
('iho'  ever  fo  much  provoked  to  it)  have  done  Him  one^  I  feel 
difpofed,  and  heartily  willing  humbly  to  confefs  myFault  to  him, 
and  on  my  Knees  to  afk  Forgivenefs  of  him  ;  iho*  at  the  fame 
Time  he  ihould  jufiify  himfelf  in  all  the  Injuries  he  has  done  me, 
and  Oiould  only  make  Ufeofmy  humble  Ccnfeflion  to  blacken 
my  Chara<Stcr  the  more,  and  rcprefent  me  as  the  only  Perfon' 
guilty,  ^c.  Yea,  tho'  he  fhould  as  it  were  infult  me,  and  fay 
He  knsw  all  this  before^  and  that  1  wm  making  work  for  Repent 
tancc^  &;c.  Tho'  what  I  faid  concerning  lAx.lVhiitelJey  was  only 
fpoken  in  private,  to  a  Friend  or  two  ;  and  being  partly  over- 
heard, was  related  tc  the  Fcclorj  and  bv  him  exicried  from  my 

Fi  lends  ; 


ef  Mr.  Davl^  Braincrd.      A.D.1743.       85 

Friends  ;  yet,  feeing  it  was  divulged  and  made  publick,  I  was 
willing  to  confers  my  Fault  therein  publickly.-"But  I  truft,God 
will  plead  my  Caufe.  * 

[The  nextDay  he  went  to  Derhy  ;  then  to.S*<?tt*^^«^y, where  he 
fpent  the  Sabbath  :  and  fpeaks  of  fome  fpiritual  Comfort  ;  but 
complains  much  of  Unfixednefs,  and  Wandrings  of  Mind  in 
Religion.] 

Monday,  ^ept.  19.  In  the  Afternoon, rode  to  5^/^/^^^^?,  and 
there  preached.  Had  fome  Meafure  of  Affiftance,both  inPrayer 
and  Preaching.  I  felt  ferious,  kind  and  tender  towards  allMan- 
kind,  ^nd  longed  that  Holinefs  might  flourifh  more  on  Earth. 


*  I  was  witnefs  to  the  veryChriftianSpiritMr.^rfl/W^  fhew'd 
at  that  Time,  being  then  at  ISlew- Haven,  and  being  One 
that  he  faw  fit  to  confult  on  that  Occafion.  (This  was  the 
firftTime  that  ever  I  hadOpportunity  of  perfonalAcquain- 
tance  with  him.)  There  truly  appeared  in  him  a  great  De- 
gree of  Calmnefs  and  Humility  ;  without  the  leaft  Ap- 
pearance of  Rifing  of  Spirit  for  any  ill  Treatment  he  fup- 
pofed  he  had  fuffered,  or  the  leaft  Backwardnefs  to  abafe 
himfelf  before  Them  who  he  thought  had  wrong'd  him. 
What  he  did  was  without  any  Objeaion  or  Appearance  of 
Reluaance,  even  in  private  to  his  Friends,  that  he  freely 
open'd  himfelf  to.  Earnelt  Application  was  made  on  his 
Behalf  to  the  Authority  of  the  College,  that  he  might  have 
hisDegree  then  given  him  ;  and  particularly  by  theRev.  Mr. 
Burr^  of  Newark,  one  of  the  Correfpondents  of  the  Hon. 
Society  in  Scotland  ;  He  being  fent  from  New-Jerfey  to 
NeW'Maven,  by  the  reft  of  thcCommiffioners,for  thatEnd  ; 
and  many  Arguments  were  ufed  ;  but  without  Succefs. 
Indeed  the  Governours  of  the  College  were  fo  far  fatisfied 
with  the  Rcfledions  Mr.  Brainerd  had  made  on  himfelf, 
that  they  appeared  willing  to  admit  him  again  into  College  ; 
but  not  to  give  him  \{\sDeiree^  'till  hefhould  have  remam'd 
there,  at  leaft  a  Twelve-Month,  which  being  contrary  to 
what  the  Correfpondents,  to  whom  he  was  now  engaged, 
had  declared  to  be  their  Mind,  he  did  nqt  confent  to  it. 
He  defired  his  Degree,  as  he  thought  it  would  tend  to  his 
being  more  extenfively  ufeful ;  but  ftill  when  he  was  deny '4 
it.  hemanifeftednoDifappointmcntorRefemmeBt. 

M  z  Tuefday 


S4     ^/.  26.  fhs    LIFE 

Tuefday,  Sept.  ao.  Had  Thoughts  of  going  forward  on  my 
Journey  to  my  Indians ;    but  towards   Night  was  taken  with  a 
hard  Pain  in  my  Teeth,  and  fhivcring  Cold,    and    could  not 
poflibly  recover  a  comfortable  Degree  of   Warmth  the  whole 
Night  following.     I  continued  very  full  of  Pain  all  Night  ;  and 
in  the  Morning  had  a  very  hard    Fever,   and    Pains   almoft  all 
ever  my  whole  Body.     1  had  a  Ser.fe  of  the  divine  Goodnefs  in 
appointing  this  to  be  the  Place  of  my  Sickncfs*  viz.  among  my 
Friends  that  were  very  Kind   to  me.      |   fhould  probably   have 
psrifhed,  if  I  had  firll  got  Home  to  my  ovv'n  Ploufe  in  the  Wil- 
derncfi,  where  I  have  none  to  converfe  with  but  the  poor  rude 
ignorant    Indiam.       Here   1    faw   was  Mercy    in  the  midft  of 
AiB'6l:ion.      I  continued  thus,   moftly  confined  to  my  Bed,  'till 
Friday-Night  ;  very  full  of  Pain  moft  of  the  Time  5  but  thro* 
divine  Goodnefs  not  afraid  of  Death.     Then  the  extream  Folly 
of,  rhofe  appeared  to  me,   who  put  ofF  their  turning  to  God  'till 
a  Sic!c-Bed.     Surely  this  is  not  a  Time  proper  to  prepare  for 
Eternity.—-  On  Friday-Evening  mv   Pains  went   ofF  fomething 
fuddenly  ;   and  1  was  exceedino;  weak,  and  almoft  fainted  ;  but 
v-as   very  comfortable   the    Nip.ht    following.     Thofe    Words 
p/i/.  cxviii.17.  I  frequently  revolved  in  myMind  ;  and  thought 
wc  were  to  prize  the  Continuation  of  Life  only  on  this  Account, 
that  we  vmy  p?ew  forth  Gcd's  GoodneJ:  and  Works  of  Grace. 

[From  this  Time,  he  gradually  recovered  :  And  on  the  next 
Tuefday  was  fo  well  as  to  be  able  to  go  forward  on  his  Journey 
Homewards  :  But  v/as  *till  the  Tuefday  following  before  he 
reach'd  KaunaumseK  And  feems,  great  Part  of  this  Time,  to 
have  had  a  very  deep  and  lively  Senfe  of  the  Vanity  and  Empti- 
nefs  of  all  Things  here  below,  and  of  the  Reality,  Nearnefs  and 
vait  Importance  of  eternal  Things.  ] 

Tuefday^O^^Z'^r  4.  This  Day  rodcHome  to  my  ownHoufe  and 
People.  The  poor  Indians  appear'd  very  glad  of  my  Return. 
Found  my  Houfe  and  all  Things  in  Safety.  I  prefently  fell  on 
my  Knees  and  blclled  God  for  ray  fafe  Return,  after  a  long  and 
tedious  Journey,  and  a  Seafon  of  Sicknefs  in  fcveral  Places 
where  I  had  been,  and  afier  I  had  been  lick  my  felf.  God  has 
renewed  his  Kindncfs  to  me,  in  pieferving  me  onejourney  more. 
1  have  taken  many  confiderable  Journeys  iince  this  Time  laft 
Year,  and  yet  (yod  has  never  luflcred  one  of  my  Bones  to  be 
broken,  or  any  diflrefTing  Calamity  to  befall  me,  excepting  the 
ill  Turn  I  had  in  my  l^ft  Journey  ;  Tho'  I  have  been  often  ex- 
pofed  to  Cold  and  Hunger  in  the  Wildcrnefs,  where  the  Com- 
forts 


^/ Mr.  David  Brain erd.  A.D.1743.    85 

for(s  of  Life  were  not  to  be  had  ;  have  frequently  been  loft  in 
the  Woods ;  and  fometimes  oolig'd  to  ride  much  of  the  Night  ; 
and  once  lay  out  in  the  Woods  all  Night.  BkfC^d  be  God  that 
has  preferved  me. 

[  In  his  Diary  for  the  next  eleven  Days,  are  great  Complaints 
of  Diftance  from  God,  fpiritual  Pride,  Corruption,  and  exceed- 
ing Vilenefs.  He  once  fays,  hisHeart  was  fo  prefs'd  v/iih  aSenfe 
of  his  Pollution,  that  he  could  fcarcely  have  the  Face  and  Im- 
pudence (as  it  then  appeared  to  him)  to  defire  that  God  (hould 
not  damn  him  forever.  And  at  another  Time,  he  fays,  He  had 
fo  little  Senfe  of  God,  or  Apprehenfion  and  Relifh  of  his  Glory 
and  Excellency,  that  it  made  him  more  difpofcd  to  Kindnefs 
and  Tendernefs  towards  thofe  who  are  blind  and  ignorant  of 
God  and  Things  divine  and  heavenly.] 

Lord's-Day,  O^ob.  16.  In  the  Evening,  God  was  pleafed  to 
give  me  a  feeling  Senfe  of  my  own  Unworthinefs  ;  but  thro'  di- 
vine Goodnefs  fuch  as  tended  to  draw,  rather  than  drive  ms 
from  God  :  It  filPd  me  withSolemnity.  I  retired  alone  (^having 
at  this  Time  a  Friend  with  me)  and  poured  out  my  Soul  to 
God,  with  much  Freedom  ;  and  yet  in  Anguifti,  to  find  my  felf 
fo  un/peakably  linful  and  unworthy  before  a  holy  God.  Was 
now  much  religned  under  God's  DIfpenfations  towards  me,tho' 
my  Trials  had  been  very  great.  But  thought  whether  I  could 
be  refign'd,  if  God  fhould  let  the  Frenchlndiam  come  upon  me, 
and  deprive  me  of  my  Life,  or  carry  me  away  Captive  (tho*  I 
knew  of  no  fpecial  Reafon  then  to  propofe  this  Trial  to  myfelf, 
more  than  any  other)  and  my  Soul  feem'd  fa- far  to  refi:  and  ac- 
quiefce  in  God,  that  theSting  andTerror  of  thefeThings  feem'd 
in  a  great  Meafure  gone  .  Prefently  after  I  came  to  the  Indians^ 
whom  I  was  teaching  to  fing  Pfalm-Tunes  that  Evening,  I  re- 
ceived the  following  Letter  from  Siocihridge,  bv  a  MefTenger 
fent  on  the  Sabbath  on  Purpofe,  which  made  it  appear  of  greater 
Importance. 

"  •S'/r,  Juftnowwe  received  Advices  from  Qo\.  Stoddard^ 
*^  that  there  is  the  utmoft  Danger  of  a  Rupture  v/ith  France. 
"  He  has  received  the  fame  from  his  Excellency  ourGovcrnour, 
*'  ordering  him  to  give  Notice  to  all  the  expofed  Places,  that 
''  they  may  fecure  themfelves  the  beft  they  can  .againft  any 
"  fudden  Invafion.  VVe  thought  beffc  to  fend  diredtly  to  Kau- 
'*  naumeek,  that  you  may  take  the  prudenteft  Meafures  for  your 
^»  Safety  that  dwell  there.  I  am,  Sir,  ISc, 

I 


85    ^/.  26.  The  LIFE 

1  thought,  upon  reading  the  Contents,  it  came  in  a  goodSea- 
fffn  ;  for  my  Heart  feem'd  fomething  iix'd  on  God,  and  there- 
fore  I  was  not  much  furprized  :  But  this  News  only  made  mc 
more  ferious,  and  taught  me  that  I  muft  not  pleafe  my  felf  with 
any  of  the  Comforts  of  Life  which  I  had  been  preparing  for  my 
Support.  Blefled  be  God,  that  gave  me  any  Intenfenefs  and 
Fervency  this  Evening. 

Monday,  05Uih.  17.  Had  fome-zifing  Hopes  fometimcs,  that 
^od  would ar'ife  and  have  Mercy  on  X\ox\  Jpeed'ily.  My  Heart  is 
indeed  refrefhed,  when  1  have  any  prevailing  Hopes  of  Z/5«*s 
Prcfperity.  O  that  I  may  fee  the  glorious  Day,  when  Zion  fhall 
become  the  Joy  of  the  whde  Earth  I  Truly  there  is  nothing 
that  1  greatly  value  in  this  lower  World, 

[OnTuefdayjhe  rode  ioStockhridge  ;  complains  of  being  much 
diverted,  and  having  but  little  Life.  On  Wednefday,  he  ex- 
p^efles  fome  folemn  Senfe  of  divine  Things,  and  a  longing  to 
be  always  doing  for  God  with  a  godly  Frame  of  Spirit,] 

Thurfday,  Ojish.  20.  Had  but  little  Senfe  of  divine  Things 
this  Day,  Alas,  that  fo  much  of  my  preciousTime  is  fpent  with 
fo  little  of  God  !  Thofe  are  tedious  Days^  wherein  I  have  ko 
Spirituality. 

Friday,  OSIob.  21,  Returned  home  to  Kaunaumeek  :  Was 
glad  to  get  alone  in  my  littleCottage,and  to  cry  to  that  God  who 
fceth  in  fecret  and  is  prefent  in  a  Wildernefs. 

Saturday,  O^ob.  22.  Had  but  little  fenfibleCommunion  with 
God.  ThisWorld  is  a  darkCloudyManfion.  Oh, when  will  the 
Sun  cf  Rigbteoufnefs  Ihineon  my  Soul  withoutCeflation  or  Inter- 
miflion. 

Lords-Day,  O^oh.  23.  In  theMorning,  had  a  little  Dawn  of 
Comfort  arifing  fromFIopes  of  feeing  gloriousDays  in  theChurch 
of  God  :  Was  enabled  to  pray  for  fucha  gloriousDay  withfomc 
Courage  and  Strength  of  Hope.  In  the  Forenoon,  treated  on 
the  Glories  of  Heaven,  difc—  In  the  Aft£rnoon,  on  theMiferies 
of  Hell,  and  the  Danger  of  going  there.  Had  fomeFreedom  and 
Warmth,  both  Parts  of  the  Day.  And  my  People  were  very 
Attentive.  In  the  Evening,  two  or  three  came  to  me  under 
Concern  for  their  Souls ;  to  whom  I  was  enabled  to  difcourfe 
clofely,  and*  with  fome  Earneftnefs  and  Dcfire.  O  that  God 
would  be  merciful  to  their  poor  Souls. 

[He 


(?/ Mr.  David  Brainerd,      AD.1743.      87 

[  He  feems,  through  the  whole  of  this  Week,  to  have  been 
greatly  engaged  to  fill  up  every  Inch  of  Time  in  the  Seivice  of 
God,  and  to  have  been  moft  dcligently  employed  inStudy, Prayer 
and  inftruding  the  Indians  ;  and  from  Time  to  Time  exprefTes 
Longings  of  Soul  after  God,  and  the  Advancement  of  his  King- 
dom,and  fpiritual  Comfort  and  Refreihment.] 

Lords-Day,  OSfoh.  30.  In  the  Morning,  enjoyed  fome  Fixed- 
nefs  of  Soul  in  Prayer,  which  was  indeed  fwcct  awd  defirable  : 
Was  enabled  to  leave  my  felf  with  God,  and  to  acquiefce  in  him. 
At  Noon,  my  Soul  was  refrefh'd  with  reading  Rev.  iii.  more 
efpeciajly  the  nth  and  12th  Verfe?.  O  my  Soul  longed  for 
that  bleiled  Day,  when  I  (hould  dwell  m  the  Temp/e  of  God,  and 
^0  no  more  out  of  his  immediate  Prefence  ! 

Monday,  05lob.  31.  Rode  to  Kinderhook,  about  15  Miles 
from  my  Place.  While  riding,  I  felt  fome  divine  Sweetnefs  in 
the  Thoughts  of  being  a  Pillar  in  the  Temple  of  God  in  the  upper 
World,  and  being  no  more  deprived  of  his  blelTed  Prefence  and 
the  Senfe  of  his  Favour,  which  is  better  than  Life.  My  Soul 
was  fo  lifted  up.  to  God,  that  I  could  pour  out  my  Defires  to 
him,  for  more  Grace  and  furtherDegrees  of  San6lification,with 
abundant  Freedom.  Oh,  I  longed  to  be  more  abundantly  pre- 
pared for  that  BlefTednefs,  with  which  I  was  then  in  fome  Mea- 
fure  refrefh'd  !-—  Returned  Home  in  the  Evening  5  but  took  an 
cxtreamly  bad  Cold  by  riding  in  the  Night. 

Tuefday,  Novemh.  i.  Was  very  much  difordered  in  Body, 
and  fometimes  full  of  Pain  in  my  Face  and  Teeth  :  Was  not 
able  to  ftudy  much,  and  had  not  much  fpiritual  Comfort.  Alas, 
when  God  is  withdrawn,  all  is  gone  I — Had  fome  fweetTho'ts, 
which  I  could  not  but  write  down,  on  the  Benign,  Nature,  and 
End  of  Chri/iianity. 

Wednefday,  Novemb.  2.  Was  ftill  more  indifpofed  in  Body, 
and  in  much  Pain,  moft  of  the  Day  :  Had  not  much  Comfort  ; 
was  fcarcely  able  to  ftudy  at  all  ;  and  ftill  intirely  alone  in  the 
Wildernefs.  But  blefled  be  the  Lord,  I  ben't  expofed  in  the 
©pen  Air  :  I  have  a  Houfe,  and  many  of  the  Comforts  of  Life, 
to  fupport  me.  I  have  learn'd,  in  a  Meafure,  that  all  good 
Things,  relating  both  to  Time  and  Eternity,  come  from  God.— 
In  the  Evening,  had  fome  Degree  of  quickening  in  Prayer  :  I 
think,  God  gave  rae  feme  Senfe  of  his  Prefence. 

Thurfday,  Novemb.  3.  Spent  this  Day  in  fccret  Fafting  and 
Prayer,  from  Morning  'till  Night.  Early  \n  the  Morning,  had 
(I  think)  fome  fmal]  Degree  of  AiTiftancc  in  Prayer.     Aftci- 

warrds-s 


S5     yE/.  26.  5-^5  LIFE 

wards,  read  the  Story  of  Elijah  the  Prophet,"i  Kings^  xvii,  xviii, 
and  XIX  Chapters,  and  alfo  2  Kings  ii.  and  iv.  Chapters.  My  Soul 
was  much  moved,  obferving  the  Faith,  Zeal  and  Power  of  that 
holy  Man  ;  how  he  wreftled  with  God  in  Prayer,  ^c.  My  Soul 
then  cried  with  Elijha^  Where  is  the  Lord  G od  of  EVijzh  !  Oh, 
1  longed  for  more  Faith  !  My  Soul  breathed  after  God,  and 
pleaded  with  him,  that  a  double  Portion  of  that  Spirit,  which  was 
given  to  Elijah,  might  re/^  on  me.  And  that  which  was  divinely 
jefrefliing  and  fhengihning  to  my  Soul,  was,  I  faw  that  God  is 
ihefame  that  he  was  in  the  Days  of  Elijah.  -—  Was  enabled  to 
wreftlc  with  God  by  Prayer,  in  a  more  afFedtionate,  fervent, 
humble,  intenfe,  and  importunate  Manner,  than  I  have  for 
many  Months  pafl.  Nothing  feem'd  too  hard  for  God  to  per- 
form J  nothing  too  great  for  me  to  hope  for  from  Him.—  I 
had  for  many  Months  intirely  loft  all  Hopes  of  being  made  in- 
ftrumental  of  doing  any  fpecial  Service  for  God  in  the  World  : 
It  has  appeared  intirely  impofTible,  that  one  (o  black  and  vile 
(hould  be  thus  improved  for  God  !  But  at  this  Time  God  was 
pleafed  to  revive  this  Hope.— Afterwards  read  the  iiid  Chap,  of 
Exod-  and  on  to  the  xxth,  and  faw  more  of  the  Glory  &  Mojefiy 
of  God  difcovered  m  thofe  Chapters,  than  ever  1  had  feen  be- 
fore J  frequently  in  the  mean  Time  falling  on  my  Knees  and 
crying  to  God  for  the  Faith  of  Mofes,  and  for  a  Manifeflation 
of  the  divine  Glory,  Efpecially  the  iiid  &  ivth,  and  Part  of  the 
xivthSc  xvth  Chapters,  were  unfpeakably  fweet  to  my  Soul  :  My 
Soul  blefTed  God,  that  he  had  fiiewn  himfelf  (o  gracious  to  his 
Servants  of  old.  The  xvth  Chapter  feem*d  to  be  the  very.  Lan- 
guage u'hich  my  Soul  utter'd  toGod  in  theSeafonof  my  firft  fpiri- 
tual  Comfort, v.'hen  I  had  juft  got  thro'  xhcRedSea.,hy2.  /Fizy  that 
I  had  no  Expectation  of.  O  how  my  Soul  then  rejoyced  in  God  ! 
And  now  thofe  Things  came  frefh  and  lively  to  my  Mind  ;  nov/ 
my  Soul  blefs'd  God  afrefh,  that  he  had  opcn'd  that  unthought 
of  fVay  to  deliver  me  from  the  Fear  of  the  Egyptians,  when  I  a!- 
moftdefpair'd  of  Life.-- Afterwards  read  the  Story  of  Abraham's 
Pilgrimage  in  the  Land  of  Canaan:  My  Soul  was  melted,  in 
obferving  his  Faith^  how  he  lean'd  on  God  ;  how  he  commurud 
with  God,  and  what  a  Stranger  he  was  here  in  the  World. 
After  that,  read  the  Story  of  Jojfph\  Sufferings,  and  God's 
CJoodnefs  to  him  :  Blefled  God  tor  thefe  Examples  of  Faith  and 
Patience.  My  Soul  was  ardent  in  Prayer,  was  enabled  to 
wrcftle  ardently  for  my  felf,  for  Chrifiijn  Friends,  and  for  the 
Church  of  God.  And  felt  more  Defire  to  fee  the  Power  of 
God  in  the  Convcrfi^n  of  Soul?;  than  1  have  done  for  a  long 

Seafon. 


c/ Mr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1743:     tf 

Seafon.  Blefied  be  God  for  this  Seafon  of  Fafting  and  Prayer. 
May  hisGoodnefs  always  abide  with  me,&  draw  mySoul  toHim. 
Thurfday,  ISlovemb,  4.  Rode  to  Kinderhook  ;  went  quite  to 
Uu  fen's- River,  about  20  Miles  from  my  Houfe  ;  performed 
fomc  Bufmefs  ;  and  returned  Home  in  the  Evening  to  my  own 
Houfe.  J  had  rather  ride  hard,  and  fatigue  my  felf,  to  get 
Home,  than  to  fpend  the  Evening  and  Night  amongft  thofe  that 
have  no  Regard  for  God, 

[The  two  next  Days,  he  was  very  ill  and  full  of  Pain,  proba- 
bly through  his  riding  in  theNight,  after  a  fatiguing  Day's  Jour- 
ney onThurfday  :  But  yet  fcems  to  have  been  diligent  inBufmefs.] 

Monday,  JSIcvemh.  7.  This  Morning,  the  Lord  afforded  me 
fome  fpecial  AfTiftance  in  Prayer  :  My  Mind  was  folemn, 
fix'd,  affectionate,  and  ardent  in  Defires  after  Holinefs  ;  and 
felt  full  of  Tendernefs  and  Love  ;  and  my  Affedions  feemed  to 
be  difTolved  into  Kindnefs  and  Softnefs.--In  the  Evening,  en- 
joyed the  fame  comforfableAfriftance  in  Prayer,  ?;s  in  theMot-n- 
ing  :  My  Soul  longed  after  God,  and  cried  to  him  wah  a  filial 
Freedom,  Reverence  and  Boldnefs.  O  that  1  might  be  intirely 
confccrated  and  devoted  to  God. 

[The  two  next  Days,  he  complains  of  bodily  Illnefs  &  Pain  5 
but  much  more  of  fpiritual  Barrennefs  and  Unprofitabieners.j 

Thurfday,  Nov.  10.  Spent  this  Day  in  Fafting  and  Prayer 
alone.  In  iheMorning,was  very  dull  and  lifelefs  5  W2S  fomething 
melancholy  and  difcouraged.  But  after  fome  Time,  reading 
2  Kings  xix  Chap,  my  Soul  was  moved  and  affc<5led  ;  efpecially 
reading  Verje  14.  and  onward.  I  faw  there  was  no  other  Way 
for  the  afRided  Children  of  God  to  take,  but  to  go  to  God 
v/iih  all  tJ^eir  Sorrows.  Hezekiah^  in  his  great  Diftrefs,  went 
and  fpread  his  Complaint  before  the  Lord.  1  was  then  enabled 
to  fee  ihe  mighty  Power  of  God,  and  my  extreamNeed  of  that 
Pov/er  :  Was  enabled  to  cry  to  God  afFedionately  &  ardently  for 
his  divine  Power  and  Grace  to  be  exercifed  towards  me.— After- 
wards, read  the  Story  of  David's  Trials,  and  obferved  theCourfe 
he  took  under  them,  how  he  ftrengthncd  his  Hands  in  God  ; 
whereby  my  Soul  was  carried  out  after  God,  enabled  to  cry 
to  Him  and  rely  upon  Him,  and  felt  Jirong  in  ihe  Lord.  Was 
afterwards  refrefh'd,  obferving  the  blefied  Temper  that  was 
wrought  in  David  by  his  Trials  :    All  Bitternefs  and  DdvQ  of 

N  Revenge 


9© 


^t.iG.  rhe   LIFE 


me  in  my  fpiritunl  Cor,fli£ls.     Was  a  little  refrefli'd  to  find  one 
with  whom  I  could  converfe  of  iniuard  Trials^  &;c. 

Wediiefday,  Deccmb.  7.  Spent  the  Evening  in  Perplexity, 
with  a  Kind  of  guilty  Indolence.  When  I  have  no  Heart  or 
Refolution  for  God  and  the  Duties  incunrbent  on  me,  I  feel 
guilty  of  Negligence  and  Mirimprovement  of  Time.  Certainly 
i  ought  to  be  ergaged  in  my  Work  and  Bufinefs,  to  the  utmoft 
Extent  of  my  Strength  and  Ability, 

Thurfday,  Decerr.b,  8.   My  Mind  was  much    diftra£led  with 
different  Affe6tions.   Seem'd  to  be  at  an  amazing  Diftance  from 
God  :  and  looking  round  in  the  World,  to  fee  if  there  was  not 
ibme  Happinefs  to  be  derived  from  it,  God,  and  f(  me  certain 
Ob}e6ls  in  the  World,  feem'd  each  to  invite  my  Heart  and  Af- 
fcdiions  ;  and  my  Soul  ftem'd  to  be  diltra6led    between  them, 
1  have  not  been  fo  much  befet  with  the  World  ior  a  long  Time  ; 
and  that  withRelation  to  fome  particularObje£^j  which  I  thought 
my  felf  moft  dead   to.     But  even  while  1  was  dcTiring  to  pleafe 
my  fclf  with  any  Thing    below,  Guilt,    Sorrow^    and  Perplexity 
attended  the    firft   Motions  of  Defire.     Indeed  I  can't   fee   the 
Appearance  of  Pleafure  and  Happinefs  in  theWorld,   as  I  ufed  to 
do  :   And    blefled    be  God  for  any    Habitual    Deadnefi>  to  the 
World.-  -  I  found  no  Peace,  orDeliverance  from  thisDiitra6lion 
and  Perplexity  of   Mind,  'till  I  found  Accefs   to  the  Throne  of 
Grace  :   And  as  foon  as  1  had  any  Senfe  of  God  and  Things  di- 
vine, the  Allurements  of  the  World  vanif]:!^,  and  my  Heart  was 
determined  for  God.     But  my  Soul    mourned  over  my  P'olly, 
that  f  fhould  dcfirc  any  PJeafure,  but  only  in  God.   God  lorgivc 
my  fpifitual  Idolatry. 

[  The  next  thirteenDays,he  appears  to  have  been  continually 
in  deepConcern  about  the  Improvement  of  preciousTime  ;  and 
ihcTt  are  many  ExprefHons  of  Grief,  that  he  improved  Time  no 
tetter  ;  fuch  2$, Oh,  what  M'lfery  do  I  feel^  when  my  Thought  rove 
oiler  Viimtv  !  I  Jhould  be  happy  if  always  tnga/^ed  for  God  !  O 
wretched  Aian  that  I am^  &c  I  Speaks  of  his  being  pained  with 
a  Senfe  of  hisB^rrennefi,  perplexed  with  hisWandrings,  longing 
for  Deliverance  from  the  Being  of  Sin,  mourning  that  Time 
pafl  away,  and  fa  little  vv?.s  done  for  God,  b'^.--  On  Tuefday, 
Decemh.  20.  He  fpeaks  of  his  being  vifited  at  Kaunaumeek  by 
fjme  under  fpiritual  Concern.] 

Thurfday,  Decemb.  22.  Spent  this  Day  alone  in  Fafting  and 
Fraver,  and  Reading  in  God's  Woid  the  Exercifes  and  Deli- 
verances  of  God's  Children.  Had,  f  truff,  fome  Exercife  o'i 
Faith  and  realising  Apprehenfion  of  divine  Pavver,   Grace  and 

Holinefs  1 


cf  Mr.  David  Brainerd.         ^•^•1743.    95 

Holinefs  ;  and  alfoof  the  Unchangeablenefs  of  God,  that  he  is 
the  fame  as  he  was  when  he  delivered  his  Saints  of  old  out  of 
great  Tribulation.  My  Soul  was  fundry  Times  in  Prayer  en- 
larged lor  ood's  Church  andPeopie.  O  that  Zion  might  become 
t\\Q  Joy  of  the  Whole  Earth.  'Tis  better  to  wait  upon  God  with 
Paiience,  than  to  put  Confidence  in  any  Thing  in  this  lower 
World.  M^  Soul^  wait  Thou  on  ike  Lord  ;  for  from  him  coma 
thy  Salvation. 

Friday,  Decemb.  23.  Felt  a  little  more  Courage  and  Refolu- 
tion  in  Religion,  than  at  fonae  other  Times. 

Saturday,  Decemb.  24.  Had  feme  Affiftance,  and  longing 
Defires  after  San6lification,  in  Prayer  thif  Da^' ;  efpecially  in  the 
Evening  :  Was  fenfible  of  my  own  Weaknefs  and  fpiritual  [m- 
potency  :  Saw  plainly,!  fhould  fall  into  Sin,  if  God  of  his  abun- 
dant Mercy  did  wox.  uphold  my  Soul,  and  withold  me  from  Evil. 
O  that  God  would  uphold  me  by  his  free  Spirit ^  and  fave  me  from 
ihe  Hour  of  Temptation. 

Lord's-Day,  Decemb.  25.  Pray'd  much,  in  theMorning,with 
a  feeling  Senfe  of  my  own  fpiritual  Weaknefs  and  InfuiHcicncy 
for  any  Duty.  God  gave  me  fonae  Afliitance  in  Preaching  to 
the  Indians  ;  and  efpecially  in  the  Afternoon,  when  I  was  ena- 
bled to  fpeak  with  uncommon  Plainnefs,  Freedom,  and  Ear- 
Beftnefs.  BlefTed  be  God  for  any  Affiftance  granted  to  one  fa 
unworthy.  Afterwards  felt  fome  Thankfulnefs  -,  but  ftill  fen- 
fible of  Barrennefs.—  Spent  fome  Time  in  the  Evening,  with 
one  or  twoPetfons  under  fpiritual  Concern, and  exhorting  others 
to  their  Duty,  l3*c. 

Monday,  Decemb.  26.  Rode  down  to  Siotkbrid^e.  Was  very 
much  fatigued  with  my  Journey,  wherein  I  underwent  great 
Hardfhip  :  Was  much  expofed  and  very  wet  by  falling  into  a 
River.  Spent  the  Day  and  Evening  without  much  Senfe  of 
divine  and  heavenly  Things  ;  But  felt  guilty,  griev'd,  and  per- 
plcx'd  with  wandring  carelefs  Thoughts. 

Tuefday,  Deeemb.  27.  Had  a  fmall  Degree  of  Warmth  In 
fecret  Prayer,  in  the  Evening  :  but,  alas,  had  but  little  fpiritual 
Life,  and  confequently  but  littleComfort  !  Oh,  thcPrefTure  of  a 
Body  of  Death  !  * 

Wedncfday,  Decemb.  28.  Rode  about  fix  Miles  to  the  Ordi- 
nation of  Mr.  Hopkins.     In  the  Seafoq  of  the  Sofemnity  was 


»  This  Day  he  wrote  the  2d  Letter  added  at  the  E  nd  of  this 
Hiftory/ 

ibmewhat 


92     j^LiS.  fbe   LIFE  AD.  1744; 

fomewhat  affected  with  a  Senfe  of  theGreafnefs  and  Importance 
of  the  Work  of  a  Minifter  ofChrift.  Afterwards  was  grieved 
to  fee  the  Vanity  of  the  Multitude.  In  the  Evening,  fpent  a 
little  Time  with  feme  Chriftian  Friends,  with  fome  Degree  of 
Satisfadion  ;  but  mod  of  the  Time  had  rather  have  been  alone. 
Thurfday,  Dscemb.  29.  Spent  the  Day  mainly  in  converfing 
with  Friends  ;  yet  enjoyed  h'ttle  Satisfadion,  becaufe  I  could 
find  but  fewdifpofed  to  Converfe  of  divine  and  heavenly  Things. 
Alas,  what  are  Things  of  this  World,  to  afford  Satisfadion  to 
the  Soul  I—  Near  Night,  returned  to  Stockbridge  ;  in  fecret 
blefs'd  God  for  Retirement,  and  that  I  ben't  always  expofed 
to  theCompany  and  Converfation  of  the  World.  O  that  I  could 
Jive  in  the  Jecret  cf  God's  Prefence, 

Friday,  Decemb,  30.  Was  in  a  folcmn  devout  Frame  in  the 
Evening.  Wonder'd  that  Earth,  with  all  its  Charms,  (hould 
ever  allure  me  in  the  leafl  Degree.  O  that  I  could  always  realize 
the  Being  and  Holinefs  of  God. 

Saturday,  Decemb.  31.  Rode  from  Stcckbridge  home  to  my 
Houfe  :  The  Air  was  clear  and  Calm, but  as  Cold  as  ever  I  felt 
it  in  the  World,  or  near.  I  was  in  great  Danger  of  perifhing 
by  the  Extremity  of  the  Seafon.—  Was  enabled  to  Meditate 
much  on  the  Road. 

Lord's-Day,  January  i.  1743,4.  In  the  Morr^ng,  haJ  fome 
fmall  Degree  of  Affiftance  in  Prayer.  Sawmyfelffo  vile  and 
unworthy,  that  I  couid  not  look  my  People  in  the  Face,  when 
I  came  to  Preach.  Oh,  my  Meanncfs,  Folly,  Ignorance,  and 
inward  Pollution  !"-In  the  Evening,  had  a  little  Afliftance  in 
Praver,fo  that  theDuty  was  delightfome, rather  then  burdenfbm. 
Refle<?ted  on  the  Goodnefs  of  God  to  me  in  the  paft  Year,  &c. 
Of  a  Truth  God  lias  been  kind  and  gracious  to  me,  tho'  he  has 
caufed  me  to  pafs  thro'  many  Sorrows  ;  he  has  provided  for  me 
bouniifully,  {o  that  J  have  been  enabled,  in  about  15  Months 
paft,  to  beftow  to  chariiableUfes  about  an  Hundred  Pounds New- 
England  Money,  that  I  can  now  remember.  *  BlefTcd  be"  the 


*  Which  was,  I  fuppofe,  to  the  value  of  about  one  Hundred 
and  eighty  five  Pcundi  in  our  Bills  of  the  old  Tenour,  as 
they  now  pafs.-—  By  this,  as  well  as  many  other  Things, 
it  is  manifeft,  that  his  frequent  Melancho'y  did  nctarifc 
from  the  Confideration  of  any  Difadvantaje  he  was  laid 
Knder  to  get  a  Living  in  the  World ^by  his  Expulfion  frem 
the  Collecze, 

X.ora 


of  Mr,  David  Brainerd.      A.D.  1 744.      gj 

Lord,  that  has  Co  far  ufed  me  as  his  Steward,  to  diftribute  a  Por- 
tion of  his  Goods,  May  I  always  remember,  that  all  I  have  comes 
from  God,  Blefled  be  the  Lord,  that  has  carried  me  thro'  all 
the  Toils,  Fatigues,  and  Hardfliips  of  the  Year  paft,  as  well  as 
the  rpiritual  Sorrows  and  Confli6ls  that  have  attended  it.  O  that 
I  could  begin  this  Year  with  Godj  and  fpend  the  whole  of  it  to 
his  Glory,  either  in  Life  or  Death. 

'Monday,  Jan.  2.  Had  fome  afFecfting  Senfe  of  my  own  Im- 
potency  and  fpiritual  Weaknefs.— -  'Tis  nothing  but  the  Powec 
of  God  that  keeps  me  from  all  Manner  of  VVickednefs.  I  fee, 
I  am  nothing,  and  can  d©  nothing  without  Help  from  above. 
Ob,  for  divine  Grace  !  In  the  Evening,  had  fome  Ardour  of 
Soul  in  Prayer,  and  longing  Delires  to  have  God  for  my  Guide 
and  Safe-guard  at  all  Times,  f 

Tuefday,  Jan.  3.  Was  employed  much  of  theDay  inWrit- 
ing  ;  and  fpent  fome  Time  in  other  necefTary  Employment. 
But  my  Time  pafTes  away  fo  fwiftly,  that  I  am  aftonifhed  when 
I  refle6lon  it,  and  fee  how  little  I, do  in  it.  My  State  of  Solitude 
does  not  make  the  Hours  hang  heavy  upon  my  Hands.  O  what 
Reafon  of  Thankfulnefs  have  I,  on  account  of  this  Retirement  I 
I  find,  that  IdonU,  and  it  feems  I  can't,  lead  a  Chri/iian  Life, 
when  I  am  abroad,  and  can*t  fpend  Time  in  Devotion,  Chrif- 
tian  Converfation,  and  SsriousMeditationjas  Ifhould  dp.  Thofe 
Weeks  that  I  am  obliged  now  to  be  from  heme,  in  order  to 
learn  tbe/«^/^«Tongue,  are  moflly  fpenc  inPerple;dty  &  Barren- 
nefs, without  much  fweetRelifb  of  divineThir?g3  ;  and  f  feel,  my 
felf  a  Stranger  at  theThrone  of  Grace, for  want  of  more  frequent 
and  continued  Retirement.  Whew  I  return  Home,  and  give 
my  felf  to  Meditation,  Prayer,  and  Faffing,  a  new  Scene  opens 
to  my  Mind,  and  my  Soul  longs  for  Mortification,  Self- denial, 
Humih'ty,  and  Divorcement  from  all  the  Things  of  the  VVorld.' 
This  Evening,  my  Heart  was  fomewhat  warm  and  fervent  in' 
Prayer  and  Meditation, To  that  I  was  loth  to  indulge  Sleep.  Con- 
tinued \n  thofe  Duties  'tiil  about  Midnight. 

Wednefday,  Jan,  4.  Was  in  a  refigned  and  mortifiedTempe'r 
of  Mind,  mucfi  of  the  Day.  Time  appeared  a  Mcfnent,  Life  a 
Vapour,  and  all  its  Enjoyments  as  etnoty  Babbles,  and  fleeting 
BUfts  of  Wmd.  -  '■ 


f  This  Day  he  wrote  tht-  yl  Letter^  pubhTned  at  the  End  of 
this  AccoUDCcf  his  L;'e. 

'•'  Thi;rfiay, 


54    ^/.  26.  ri'^  LIFE 

Thurfday,  'Jan  5.  Had  a  humbling  and  preffingSenfe  of  my 
Unworthinefs.  My  Senfe  of  the  Badnefs  cf  my  own  Heart  filPd 
my  Soul  with  Bitternc-rs  and  Anguifh  ;  which  was  ready  to  fink, 
as  under  the  Weight  of  a  heavy  Burden.  And  thus  fpent  the 
Evening,  'till  late.— -Was  fomewhat  intenfe  and  ardent  inPrayer. 

Friday,  Jan.  6.  Feeling  and  confidering  my  extream Weak- 
nefs,  and  Want  of  Grace,  the  Pollution  of  my  Soul,  andDanger 
of  Temptations  on  every  fide,  I  (et  apart  this  Day  for  Fafting 
andPrayer, neither  eating  nor  drinking  fromEvening  toEvening, 
befeechiiig  God  to  have  Mercy  on  me.  And  my  Soulintenfely 
long'd,  that  the  dreadful  Spots  and  Stains  of  Sm  might  be  wafh'd 
away  from  it.  Saw  fomething  of  the  Power  and  Alfufficiency  of 
God.  My  Soul  fef  m'd  to  reft  on  his  Power  andGrace  ;  longed 
for  Refignation  to  his  Will, and  Mortification  to  all  Things  here 
below.  My  Mind  was  greatly  fixM  on  divine  Things  :  My 
Refolutions  for  a  Life  of  Mortification,  continual  Watchful- 
nefs,  Self-denial,  Serioufnefs,  and  Devotion  to  God, were  ftrong 
and  fix*d  ;  my  Defires  ardent  and  Intenfe  ;  my  Confciencc 
tenderjand  afraid  of  every  Appearance  of  Evil.  My  Soul  grieved 
with  the  Rcilecl'on  on  paft  Levity,  and  Want  of  Refolution  for 
God.  I  folemnly  renewed  my  Dedication  of  my  felf  to  God, 
2nd  longed  for  C^race  to  enable  me  always  to  keep  Covenant 
v/iih  him.  Time  appeared  very  (hort.  Eternity  near  5  and  a 
great  Name,  either  in  or  after  Life,  together  with  all  earthly 
Pleafures  and  Profits,  but  an  empty  Bubble,  a  deluding  Dream. 

Saturday,  Ja?:,  -j.  Spent  this  Day  in  Serioufnefs,  with  fied- 
faft  Refolutions  for  God  and  a  Life  of  Mortification.  Studied 
clofely,  'till  I  felt  my  bodily  Strength  fail.  Felt  fame  Degree  of 
Refignation  to  God,  with  an  Acquiefcence  in  his  Difpenfations. 
Was  grieved,  that  I  could  do  fo  fittle  for  God  before  my  bodily 
Strength  faiPd.---  In  the  Evening,  tho'  tired,  yet  was  enabled  to 
continue  inftant  in  Prayer  for  fome  Time.  Spent  the  Time  in 
Reading,  Meditation,  and  Prayer,  'till  rhe  Evening  was  far 
fpent  :  Wa!<  grieved, to  think  that  I  could  not  ivatch  unto  Prayer 
the  whole  Niiihr.---  But  blelfetil  be  God,  Heaven  is  a  Place  of 
continual  and  inceflant  Devotion,  tho'"  Earth  is  dull. 

[The  fix  Days  following,  he  continued  in  the  fame  happy 
Frame  of  Mind  ;  enjoyed  the  fame  Compofure,Calmnefs,  Re- 
fignation, ardent  Delire  and  fvveet  Fervency  of  Spirit,  in  a  high 
Degree,  every  Day,  not  one  excepted.  Thurfday,  this  Week, 
he  kept  as  a  D:iy  of  fecret  Fafting  and  Grayer.] 

Setturday, 


of  Mr,  David  Braincrd,     A.D.  ij^'^,    ^^ 

Saturday,  Jan.  14.     This  Morning,  enjoyed  a  moft  folemn 
Seafon  in  Prayer  :  My  Soul  feem'd  enlarged  and  affifted  to  pour 
out  it  felf  to  God  for  Grace,  and  for  every  Blefling  I  wanted, 
for  my  felf,  my  dear  Chriftian  Friends,  and  for  the  Church  of 
God  ;  and  was  fo  enabled  to    fee  him  who  is  invifbUy  that  my 
Soul  rejied  upon  him  for  the  Performance  of  every  Thing  I  afked 
agreable  to  his  Will.     It  was  then  my  Happinefs,    to  continue 
inftant  in  Prayer^  and  was  enabled  to  continue  in  it  for  near  an 
Hour.     My  Soul  was  then Jirong  in  the  Lord  and  in  the  Power  of 
hisMight :  Long*d  exceedingly  for  angelick  Holinefs  and  Purity, 
and  to  have  all  my  Thoughts,  at  all  Times,  employed  in  divine 
and  heavenly  Things.  O  how  blefTed  is  an  heavenly  Temper  ! 
O  how  unfpeakably  blefled  it  is,  to  feel  a  Meafure  of  that  Re<Sti- 
tHde,  in  which  we  were  at  firft  created  !—  Felt  the  fame  divine 
AlHftance  in  Prayer  fundry  Times  in  the  Day.     My  Soul  con- 
fided in  God  for  m-  felf,  and  for   his  Xion  ;   trufted  in  divine 
Power  and  Grace,  that  he  would  do  glorious  Things  in  his 
Church,  on  Earth,  for  his  own  Giory. 

[  The  next  Day  he  fpeaks  of  fome  Glimpfes  he  had  of  the  di- 
vine Glories,  and  of  his  being  enabled  to  maintain  his  Refolutions 
in  fome  Meafure  ;  but  complains,  that  he  could  not  draw  near 
toGod  :  Seems  to  be  fill'd  with  tremblingFears  left  he  fhould  re- 
turn to  a  Life  of  Vanity,  to  pleafe  himfelf  with  fome  of  the 
Enjoyments  of  this  lower  World ;  awd  fpeaks  of  his  being  much 
troubled,  and  feeling  guilty,  that  he  fhould  addrefs  immortal 
Souls  with  no  more  Ardency  and  Defire  of  their  Salvation.—  Oa 
Monday,  he  rode  down  to  SiocBridge,  was  diftrefs'd  with  the 
cxtream  Cold  :  But  notwithftanding,  hi&  Mind  was  in  a  devout 
and  folemn  Frame  in  his  Journey.  The  four  next  Days,  he 
was  very  ill,  probably  by  his  fufFering  from  the  Gold  in  his  Jour- 
ney ;  yet  he  fays  he  fpent  the  Time  in  a  more  folemn  Manner 
than  he  fear'd.  On  Friday-Evening,  he  rode  down  and  vifited 
Mr.  Hopkins -y  and  on  Saturday,  rode  18  Miles  toSoIfburyyWhciQ 
he  kept  Sabbath,  and  enjoyed  confiderable  Degrees  of  God's 
gracious  PrefencCjAfliftance  in  Duty^  and  divine  Comfort  and 
Refrefhment,  longing  to  give  himfelf  wholly  to  God,  to  be 
his  forever.] 

Monday,  Jan,  23.  I  think  I  never  felt  more  refigned  tQ 
God,  nor  fo  much  dead  to  theWorld,  in  every  Refpe<Sl,asn0w: 
Was  dead  to  all  Defire  of  Reputation  and  Greatnefs,  cither  in 
Life  or  afterDeath  :  All  I  longed  for,  was  tO  be  holy,  humble^ 
crucified  to  the  World  t^Cf 

•O  •  Tucfdaj:^. 


96     JEt.  26.  Tk  LIFE 

^  Tuefday,  Jan,  24.  Near  Noon,  rode  over  ioCanaan,  In  the 
fevening,  was  unexpededly  vlfited  by  a  conliderable  Number  of 
People,  with  whom  1  was  enabled  to  converfe  profitably  of  di- 
V  neThlngs:  Took  Pains  to  defcribe  the  Difference  between  a 
legular  and  i r regular 5"^//^- /cz;.^ :  The  oneconfifting  withaSupream 
Love  to  Gcd,  but  the  othernot  ;  The  former  uniting  God's 
Glory  and  the  Soul's  Happinefs,  that  they  become  one  common 
Interefl,  but  the  latter  disjoining  and  feparating  God's  Glory 
and  the  Man's  Plappinefs,  feeking  the  latter  with  a  Negle6l  of 
the  former.  Illuftiated  this  by  that  genuine  Love  that  is  found 
between  theSexes ;  which  is  diverfe  from  that  which  is  wrought 
up  towards  a  Perfon  only  by  rational  Arguments,  or  Hope  of 
Self-Intereft.  Love  is  a  pleafingPaflionjit  affordsPleafure  to  the 
MinJ  where  it  is  ;  but  yet  true  genuine  Love  is  not  nor  can  be 
placed  upon  any  Objedl  with  that  Defign  of  pleafing  itfelf  with 
the  feeling  of  it  in  a  Man's  own  Breafl. 

[  On  Wednefday,  he  rode  to  Sheffield  ;  the  next  Day,  to 
Siockbridge  :  And  on  Saturday,  home  to  Kaunaumeek^  tho'  the 
Seafon  was  Cold  and  Stormy  :  Which  Journey  was  followed 
with  Illnefs  and  Pain.  It  appears  by  his  Diary,  that  he  fpent 
the  Time, while  riding,  in  profitable  Meditations,  and  in  lifting 
up  his  Heart  to. God  j  and  he  fpeaks  of  AlTifhnce,  Comfort, 
and  Rtfrefhment ;  but  f^ili  complains  ofBarrennefs,  izfc.  His 
Diary  for  the  five  next  Days  is  full  of  the  moft  heavy  bitterCom- 
plaints  ;  and  he  exprefles  himfelf  as  full  of  Shame  and  Self-loath- 
ing for  his  lifelefs Temper  of  Mind  andSluggifhnefs  of  Spirit,  and 
as  being  in  Perplexity  and  Extremity,  and  appearing  to  himfelf 
urifpeakably  vile  and  guilty  before  God  on  Account  of  fome  in- 
ward workings  ofCorruption  he  found  in  his  Heart,  6*^.] 

Thurfday,  Feh.  2.  Spent  this  Day  in  Faffing  and  Prayer, 
feeking  thePrefence  and  Affiftance  of  God,  that  he  would  ena- 
ble me  to  overcome  all  my  Corruptions  and  fpiritual  Enemies. 

Friday,  Feb,  3.  Enjoy *d  more  Freedom  and  Comfort  than 
of  late;  was  intenfely  engaged  in  Meditation  upon  the  different 
Whifpers  of  the  varicusPowers  andAffe6lions  of  a  pious  Mind, 
cxercifed  with  a  greatvariety  ofDifpenfations:  And  could  not  but 
write  as  well  as  meditate  on  fo  entertaining  aSubje6t.  *  I  hope,^ 


1  find  what  he  wrote  on  this  Head  among  his  Papers,  that 
were  left  in  my  Hand,  and  it  is  here  publi/hed  at  thsEnd  of 
this  Accoun.t  of  his  Life. 

the 


c/ Mr.  David  Brairrercl.     A.D.   1744,     ^j 

the  Lord  gave  me  fome  true  Senfe  of  divine  Things  this  Day  : 
But  alas,  how  great  and  prefling  are  the  Remains  of  indwelling 
Corruption  !  I  am  now  more  fenfible  than  ever,  that  God  alonls 
is  the  Jutbor  and  FinlJJjer  of  our  Faith  ;  /.  e.  that  the  whole  and 
every  Part  of  Sandification,  and  every  good  Word,  Work, or 
Thought,  that  is  found  in  me,  is  the  EfFed  of  his  Power^  and 
Grace°;  that  without  him  1  can  do  Nothing,  in  the  flri£teft 
Senfe  j  and  that  he  wor/s  in  us  to  will  and  to  do  oj  his  own  good 
P/ea/ure,  and  from  no  other  Motive.  Oh,  how  amazing  it  is 
that  People  can  talk  fo  much  about  Men'sPovver  and  Goodnefs ; 
when,  if  God  did  not  hold  us  back  every  Moment,  we  fbould 
be  Devils  incarnate  !  This  my  bitter  Experience,  for  feveral 
Days  hd  pafl,  has  abundantly  taught  me  concerning  my  felf. 

Saturday,  Fd.  4.  Enjoyed  fome  Degree  of  Freedom  and 
fpiritualRefrefhm.ent ;  was  enabled  to  pray  with  fomcFervency, 
and  longing  Defires  of  Z/Ws  Profperity  3  and  my  Faith  and 
Hope  feems  to  iah  held  of  God,  for  the  Performance  of  what  I 
was  enabled  to  plead  for.  Sanaification  in  my  felf,  and  the  In- 
gathering of  God's  Elea,  was  ail  my  Defire  j  and  the  Hope  of 
its  Accomplifhment,  all  my  Joy. 

Lords-Day,  Feb.  5.  Was  enabled  in  fome  Meafure  to  reft 
and  confide  in  God,  and  to  prize  his  Prefence  and  fomeGlimpfes 
of  the  Light  of  his  Countenance,  above  my  neceffary  Food. 
Thought  my  felf,  after  the  Seafon  of  Weaknefs,  Temptation, 
and  Defertion  I  endured  the  laft  Week,  to  be  fomewhat  like 
Samfon  j^when  his  Locks  began  to  grow  again.  Was  enabled  to 
preach  to  my  People  with  more  Life  and  Warmth,  than  1  have 
for  fome  Weeks  paft. 

Monday,  Feb,  6.  This  Morning,my  Soul  again  was  ftrength- 
ned  in  God,  and  found  fome  fweet  Repofe  in  hirn  in  Prayer  : 
Longing  efpecially  for  the  complcat  Mortification  of  Senfuality 
and  Pride,  and  for  Refignation  to  God's  Difpenfati^ns,  at  all 
Times,  as  thro*  Grace  1  felt  it  at  this  Time.  I  did  not  defire 
Deliverance  from  any  Difficulty,  that  attends  my  Circumftan- 
ces,  unkfs  God  wars  willing.  O  how  comfortable  is  tliis  Tem- 
per !—  Spent  moft  of  the  Day  in  reading  God's  Vv^ord,  ia 
Writing,  and  Prayer.  Enjoyed  repeated  and  frequent  Comfort, 
andIn.tenfenefsofSoulinPra)erthro'  the  Day.  In  the  Even- 
ing, fpent  fome  Hours  in  private  Converfation  with  my  People  : 
And  afterwards,  felt  fome  Warmth  in  fecret  Prayer. 

Tuefday,  Feb.  7.  Was  much  engaged  in  ion^^  fweet  Medi- 
tations on  the  Powers  and  Afreaionsof  the  godly  Soul  in  their 
Furfuii  of  their  belovedObjea  :   Wrote  fomething  of  the  native 

O  2  Language 


98     J^t.  26.  The  LIFE 

Language  of  fpirltual  Senfation,  in  its  foft  and  tender  Whlfpers  ; 
declaring,  that  it  now  feels  and  ta/ies  that  the  Lord  is  gracious  ; 
that  he  is  the  Supreme  Good,  theonlySoul-fatisfying  Happinefs  ; 
that  he  is  a  Compleat,  Sufficient, and  Almighty  Portion  :  faying, 

"  II  horn  have  I  in  Heaven  hut  Thee  ?  And  there  is  none  upon 
« «  Earth  that  1  deftre^beftdes  this  bleflcd  Portion.  O,  I  feel  'tis 
*<  Heaven  to  pleafe  him,  and  to  be  juft  what  he  would  have  me 
*^  to  be  !  O  that  my  Soul  were  Holy^  as  he  is  Holy  !  O  that  it 
«'  were  pure  even  as  Chriji  is  pure  ;  and  perfe^^  as  my  Father  in 
*^  Heaven  is  perfeSi  !  Thcfe,  I  feel, are  the  fweeteft  Commands 
*'  in  God's  Book,  comprifing  all  others.  And  fhall  I  break 
•^  irem  I  Muft  I  break  'em  !  Am  I  under  a  Neceffity  of  it  as 
«*  long  as  I  live  \n  theVVo.ld  !  O  mySoul,  Wo,  Wo  is  me  that 
*'  I  am  a  Sinner, becaufe  I  now  necefTarily  grieve  and  oftend  this 
*«  blefied  God,  who  is  infinite  in  Goodncfs  and  Grace  !  Oh, 
*'  mcthinks,  if  he  would  punifh  nTe  for  my  Sins,  it  would  not 
•*  wound  my  Heart  fo  deep  to  offend  him  :  But  tho*  I  fin  con- 
<^  tinually,  yet  he  continually  repeats  hisKindncfs  to  me  !  Oh, 
««  Methinks  I  cou'd  bear  any  fuifering  ;  but  how  can  I  bear  to 
*?  grieve  and  difhonour  this  blefled  God  !  How  fhall  I  yieJd 
*'  ten  Thoufand  Times  more  Honour  to  him  ?  What  fhall  I 
*'  do  to  glorify  h  worfliip  this  befl  of  Beings  ?  O  that  I  could 
"  cojfecrate  my  fclf,  Soul  and  Body,  to  his  Service  forever.  O 
'  <  that  I  could  give  up  my  felf  to  him  To  as  never  more  to  attempt 
**  to  be  my  own,  or  to  have  any  Will  or  Affections  that  are 
^«  not  perfe61iy  ccnformed  to  him.  But,  alas, alas, 1  find  I  can't 
*'  be  thus  entirely  devo.ted  to  God  :  I  can't  live  and  not  fin. 
^'  O  ye  Jngels^  do  ye  glorify  him  inceflantly  ;  and  if  pofHble, 
*'  prcflratcyourfelves  lower  before  the  blefled  King  of  Heaven. 
-«'  1  long  to  bear  a  P4rt  with  you  ;  and,  if  it  were  pcfTible,  to 
**  help  you.  Oh,  whpn  we  have  done  all  that  we  can,  to  all 
*<  Eternity,  we  Ihall  not  be  able  to  offer  the  ten  Thoufandth 
*«    Part  of  the  Homage  that  the  glorious  God  dcfervcs  !" 

Felt  roi)ieihing  fpiritua),  devour,  refigned,  and  mortified  to 
the  World,  much  of  the  Day  j  and  efpecially  towards  aad  in 
the  Evening.  Blcffed  be  God,  that  he  enables  me  to  love  him 
i(\   h in? felf. 

WcdntfJay,  J^eh.  8.  Was  in  a  comfortable  Frame  of  Soul, 
moft  of  theDay  ;  tho'  fenfible  of  and  refllefs  under  fpiritual  Bar- 
jennefr.  I  find  that  both  Mind  andBody  are  quickly  tired  with 
Intenfenefs  and  Fejvour  in  iheThings  of  God.  O  that  I  could 
I  cflj.  inceflant  r..6  4fJgi»'  in  Devolioji  and  fpiritiial  Fervour. 

Thurfday, 


of  Mr.  David  Brainerd.       A.D.  1 744. 


99 


ThurWay,  Feb.  9.  Obferved  this  Day  as  aDay  of  Fading  and 
Prayer,  intreating  of  God  to  beftow  upon  me  his  Blelling  and 
Grace  ;  efpecially  to  enable  me  to  live  a  Life  of  Mortification 
to  the  World, as  well  as  of  Refignation  and  Patience.  Enjoy'd 
fome  realizing  Senfe  of  divine  Power  and  Goodnefs  in  Prayer, 
feveral  Times ;  and  was  enabled  to  roll  the  Burden  of  my  felf 
and  Friends, and  of  Zion^  upon  theGoodnefs  andGrace  of  God  : 
But,  in  the  general, was  more  dry  and  barren  than  I  have  ufually 
been  of  late  upon  fuch  Occafions. 

Friday,  Feb,  lo.  Was  exceedingly  opprefs'd,  moft  of  the 
Day,withShame,(Srief  andFear,under  a  Senfe  of  my  paftFolly, 
as  well  as  prefent  Barrennefs  and  Coldnefs.  When  God  fets  be- 
fore me  my  paft  MifconducSl,  efpecially  any  Inftances  of  mi/guid- 
ed Zeal,  it  fmks  my  Soul  into  Shame  and  Confufion,  makes  me 
afraid  of  a  (baking  Leaf.  My  Fear  is  fuch  as  the  ProphetJ^r^- 
my  complains  of,  yer.  xx.  10.— I  have  no  Confidence  to  hold 
up  my  Face,  even  before  my  Fellow- Worms  ;  but  only  when 
my  Soul  confides  in  God, and  I  find  the  fweetTemper  of  Chrift, 
the  Spirrt  of  Humility,  Solemnity,  and  Mortification,  and  Re- 
fignation, alive  in  my  Soul.—  But,  in  the  Evening,  was  unex- 
pectedly refre(h*d  in  pouring  out  my  Complaint  to  God :  MyShame 
and  Fear  was  turned  into  a  fweet  Compofure  and  Acquiefcence 
in  God. 

Saturday,  Feb,  11.  Felt  much  as  Yefterday  :  enjoyed  but 
little  fenfible  Communion  with  God. 

Lords-Day,  Feb.  12,  My  Soul  feem'd  to  confide  in  God, and 
to  repofe  i  tfelf  on  him  ;  and  had  out-goings  of  Soul  after  God  in 
Prayer.  Enjoyed  fome  divine  Afliftance,  in  the  Forenoon,  in 
Preaching  ;  but  in  the  Afternoon,  was  more  perplex'd  with 
Shame  6jV.  Afterwards,  found  fomeRelief  in  Prayer  :  Lov'd,  aa 
a  feeble  afHiCted  defpifedCreaturejto  caft  myfelf  onaGod  of  infi- 
tfttc  Grace  andGoodnefs, hoping  for  noHappinefs  but  from  him* 

Monday,  Feb.  13.  Was  Calm  andSedate  in  Moaning- Devo- 
tions ;  and  my  Soul  feiem*d  to  rely  on  God.—  Rode  to  Stock- 
bridge,  and  enjoy  M  fome  comfortable  Meditations  by  the  Way  : 
Had  a  more  refrefhing  Tafteand  Rclifh  of  heavenly  BlefTednefs, 
than  I  have  enjoy  *d  for  many  Months  paft.  I  have  many  Times, 
of  late,  felt  as  ardent  Defires  of  Holinefs  as  ever :  But  not  fo 
much  Senfe  of  the  Sweetnefs  and  unfpeakable  Pleafare  of  theEn- 
joyments  and  Employmeats  of  Heaven,  My  Soul  longed  to 
leave  Earth,  and  bear  a  Part  with  Angels  in  their  celef^ial  Em- 
ployments. My  Soul  faid.  Lord,  it  Is  gocd  to  be  here  ;  and  it 
appeared  to  me  better  to  die,  than  to  lofe  the  Relifh  of  tbefe 
beavgnlj  Delights,  [A 


loo       JEt,i6.  The   LIFE 

[  A  Scnfe  of  dlvineThings  feem'd  to  continue  wiih  hlm,ina 
JcfferDegrec,thro'thc  nextDay.  On VVednefday  he  was»by  fome 
Difcourfe  that  he  heardjCaft  into  a  melancholyGloom, that  ope- 
rated much  in  the  fameManncr  as  hisMelancholy  had  formerly 
done,  when  he  came  firft  ioKaunaumeek  ;  TheEfFeds  of  which 
feem'd  to  continue  ,in  fame  Degree  the  fix  following  Days.] 

Wednefday,  Feb.  22.  In  the  Morning,  had  as  clear  a  Senfe 
of  the  exceeding  Pollution  of  my  Nature, as  ever  I  remember  to 
have  had  in  my  Life.  I  then  appear'd  to  my  felf  inexpreflibly 
loathfom,  &  defiled  :  Sine  of  Childhood,  of  early  Youth, and  fuch 
Follies  as  1  had  not  thought  of  for  Years  together,  (as  I  remem- 
ber) came  now  frefli  to  my  View,  as  if  committed  but  Yefter- 
day,  and  appeared  in  the  moft  odious  Colours :  They  appeared 
more  in  Number  thfln  the  Hairs  of  my  Head  :  Yea,  they  went 
cvermy  Head  as  an  heavy  Burden.—  In  the  Evening,  the  Hand 
of  Faith  feem'd  to  be  ftrengthen'd  in  God  :  My  Soul  feemed 
to  ref^and  acquiefce  in  him  :  Was  fupported  under  myBurdens, 
reading  the  cxxv.  Pfalm  :  Found  that  it  was  fwect  and  comfor- 
table to  lean  on  God. 

Thurfday,  Feb.  23.  Was  frequent  in  Prayer,  and  enjoyed 
fome  AfTiftance.—  There  is  a  God  in  Heaven^  that  over- rules  all 
Things  for  the  beft  ;  and  this  is  theComfort  of  my  Soul  :  1  had 
fainted^  vnlejs  1  had  believed  to  Jee  the  Goodnejs  of  God  in  the  Land 
cfthe  Livings  notwithftanding  prefent  Sorrows.—  In  the  Even- 
ing, enjoyed  fome  Freedom  in  Prayer,  for  my  felf,  Friends,  and 
the  Church  of  Cjod. 

Friday,  Feb.  24.  Was  exceeding  reftlefs  and  perplex'd  under 
a  Senfe  of  the  IVI  ilimprovement  of  Time  ;  Mourn'd  to  feeTime 
pafs  away  ;  Felc  in  the  greateft  Hurry  ;  feem'd  to  hare  every 
Thing  to  do  :  Yet  could  do  Nothing, but  only  grieve  and  groan 
under  my  Ignorance,  Unprofitablenefs,  Meannefs,  the  P'oolifh- 
nefs  of  my 'Anions  and  Thoughts,  the  Pride  and  Bitternefs  of 
my  pafl  Frames  (at  fome  Times, at  leaftj  all  which  at  thisTime 
2ppear*d  to  me  in  lively  Colours,  and  filPd  me  with  Shame  I 
could  nor  compofe  my  Mind  to  any  profitable  Studies,  by  Rea- 
fon  of  this  Prefiure.  And  the  Reafon,  I  judge,  why  I  am  not 
allowed  to  Study,  a  great  Part  of  my  Time,  is,  becaufe  I  ani 
endeavouring  to  lay  in  fuc^  aStock  ofKnowJedge,  as  fliall  be  a 
Self-Sufficiency.---  I  know  it  to  be  my  indifpenfdble  Duty  to 
Study,  and  qiialifv  my  felf  in  the  beft  Manner  I  can  for  publick 
Service:  But  thi«  ig  rny  Mifery,  1  naturally  Study  and  prepare, 
that  J  mav  confumeit  upon  my  Lujii  of  Pride  andSelf- Confidence. 

[  ^^ 


of  Mr,  David  Brainerd.         A.D.1744.    loi 

[  He  continued  in  much  the  fame  Frame  ofUneafinefs  at  the 
Mifimprovement  of  Time,  and  Preflure  of  Spirit  under  a  Scnfe 
of  Vilenefs,  Unprofitablenefs  tj'i'.  for  the  fix  next  following 
Days  -,  excepting  fomc  Intervals  of  Calmnefs  and  Compofure, 
in  Refignation  to  and  Confidence  in  God.] 

Friday,  March  2.  Was  moft  of  the  Day  employed  in  Writ- 
ing on  a  divine  Subjeft.  Was  frequent  in  Prayer,  and  enjoy'd 
fpme  fmall  Degree  of  Afliftance.  But  in  the  Evening,  God  was 
pleafed  to  grant  me  a  divine  Sweetnefs  in  Prayer  ;  efpecially  in 
the  Duty  of  Tntercefiion.  I  think,  I  never  felt  fo  much  Kind- 
nefs  and  Love  to  thofe  who  I  have  Reafon  to  think  are  my 
Enemies  (tho*  at  that  Time  I  found  fuch  a  Difpofition  to  think 
the  beft  of  all,  that  I  fcarce  knew  how  to  think  that  any  fuch 
Thing  as  Enmity  and  Hatred  lodg'd  in  any  Soul  ;  it  fcem'd  as 
if  all  the  World  muft  needs  be  Friends)  and  never  pray-d  with 
more  Freedom  and  Delight,  for  my  fclf,  or  deareft  Friend,  than 
I  did  now  for  my  Enemies. 

Saturday,  March  3.  In  the  Mornmg,  fpent  ( I  believe)  an 
Hour  in  Prayer,  with  great  Intenfenefs  and  Freedom,  and  with 
the  moft  foft  and  tender  AfFedion  towards  Mankind.  I  longed 
that  thofe  who  I  have  Reafon  to  think  owe  me  HI- Will,  might 
bs  eternally  hippy.  It  feem*drefrefhing,to  think  q{  nteeting  then> 
inHeaven,how  much  foevcr  they  had  injured  me  onEarth  ;  Had 
noDifpofition  to  infill  upon  anyConfeflion  from  them, in  order  to 
Reconciliation  &  theExercife  ofLove  ScKindnefa  to  them.  O'tis 
anEmblem  of  Heaven  it  felf,  to  love  ail  the  World  with  a  Love 
of  Kindnefs,  Forgivenefs,  and  Benevolence  ;  To  feel  our  Souls 
fedate,  mild  and  meek  ;  to  be  void  of  all  evil  Surmifings  and 
Sufpicions,  and  fcarce  able  to  think  Evil  of  any  Man  upon  any 
Occafion  ;  To  find  ourHearts  fimple,  open,  and  free,  to  thofe 
that  look  upon  us  with  a  different  Eye  !---  Prayer  was  iii  fweet 
an  Exsrcife  to  me,  that  1  knew  not  how  to  ceafe,  left  I  Ihould 
lofe  the  Spirit  of  Prayer.  Felt  no  Difpofition  to  cat  or  drink, 
for  the  fake  of  the  Pleafure  of  it,  but  only  to  fupport  my  Na- 
ture, and  fit  me  for  divine  Service.  Could  not  be  content 
without  a  very  particular  mention  of  a  great  Number  of  dear 
Friends  at  the  Throne  of  Grace  ;  as  alfo  the  particularCircum- 
ftances  of  many,  fo  far   as  they  were  known. 

Lords- Day,  Nov,  4.  In  the  Morning,  enjoyed  the  fame  In- 
tenfenefs  in  Prayer  asYefterday-Morning  ;  iho'  not  in  fo  great 
a  Degree  :  Felt  the  fame  Spirit  of  Love,univerfa!  Benevolence, 
Forgivenefs, Humility, Refignation,  Moriificaiion  to  theWojld, 
2^i  Cbr:7pcrL:re  of  Mind, as  then.   My  Soul  reJUd  in  GcD  ;  zt\\ 


102    Ml  26:  «^  LIFE 

I  found,  r  wanted  no  otherRefuge  or  Friend.  While  my  Soul 
thus  trulls  in  God,  all  Things  feem  to  be  at  Peace  with  me, 
even  the  Stones  of  the  Earth  :  But  when  I  can't  apprehend  and 
confide  in  God,  all  Things  appear  with  a  different  Afpecft. 

[  Through  the  four  next  Days,  he  complains  of  Barrennefs, 
want  of  holy  Confidence  in  God,  Stupidity,  Wandrings  of 
Mind,  ^c.  and  fpeaks  of  Oppreifion  of  Mind  under  a  Senfe  of 
exceedingMeannefs,  paft  Follies,  as  well  as  prefent  Workings  of 
Corruption. —  On  Friday,  he  feems  to  have  been  reftored  to  a 
confiderableDegrce  of  the  fame  excellentFrame  that  he  enjoyed 
the  Saturday  before.] 

Saturday,  March  10.     In  the  Morning,  felt  exccefliHg  dead 
to  the  World  and  all  its  Enjoyments  :  I  thought,  I  was  ready 
and  willing  to  give  upLifeand  all  its  Comforts,  as  foon  as  called 
to  it  :  And  yet  then  had  as  muchComfortof  Life  as  almoft  ever 
I  had.     Life  itfelf  now  appeared  but  an  empty  Bubble  :  The 
Riches,  Honours,  and  conamonEnjo^'ments  of  Life  appeared  ex- 
tremely taftlefs.  I  longed  to  be  perpetually  and  entirely  crucified 
to  all  Things  here  below,  by  the  Crojs  of  Chrifl,    My  Soul  was 
fweetly  refigned  toGod's  Difpofal  of  me,  in  every  Regard  ;  and! 
fa  w,  there  had  nothing  happened  to  me  but  what  was  beft  for  me. 
I  confided  in  God,  that  he  would  never  leave  me^  tho'  I  Ihould 
walk  tfjro'  the  Valley  of  the  Shadow  of  Death.     It  was  thtn  my 
Meat  and  Drink  to  be  holy,  to  live  to  the   Lord,  and  die  to  tht 
Lord  :  And  I  thought,  that  I  then  enjoyed   fuch  a  Heaven,  as 
far  exceeded  the  moft  fublime  Conceptions  of  an  unregeneratc 
Soul  ;  and  even   unfpeakably  beyond  what  I  my  felf  could  con- 
ceive of  at  another  Time.     I  did  not  wonder,  that  Peter  faid. 
Lord, it  is  good  to  be  hereyV/\iQn  thus  refrelh'd  with  divineGIories. 
My  Soul  was  full  of  Love  and  Tendernefs  in  the  Duty  of  Inter- 
ceflion  ;  efpecially  felt  a  moft  fwect  AfFedtion  to  fome  precious 
^odly   Minifters,  of  my  Acquaintance.     Pray'd  earneftly  for 
dear  Chriftians,  and  for  thofe  I  have  Reafon  to  fear  are  myEne- 
mies ;   And  could   not  have  fpoken  a  Word   of  Bitternefg,  or 
entertained  a  bitterThought,  againft  the  vileftMan  living.  Had 
a  Senfe  of  my  own  great  Unworthinefs.     My  Soul  feem'd  to 
breath  forth  Love  and  Pr ai/e  to  God  afrefh,  when  I  thought  he 
would  let  his  Children  love  and  receive  me  as  one  of  their  Bre- 
thren andFellow-CiilzcBs  :  And  when  I  thought  of  their  treat- 
ing me  in  that  Manner,  I  longed  to  \'\q  at  theirFeet  j  and  could 
think  of  no  Way  to  exprefstl^eSincerity  ^Simplicity  of  myLove 

and 


<?/  Mr.  David  Brainerd.    A.D.  1 744.    Iq^ 

and  Efieem  of  them,  as  being  much  better  than  my  felf. —  To- 
wards Night,  was  very  forrowfui :  Seem'd  to  my  felf  the  worfl 
Creature  living  ;  and  could  not  pray,  nor  meditate,  nor  think 
of  holding  up  myFace  before  theWorld. — Was  a  little  relieved 
in  Prayer,  in  the  Evening  ;  but  longed  to  get  on  my  Knees^ 
and  afk  Forgivencfs  of  every  Body  that  ever  had  feen  any  Thing 
amifs  in  my  paft  Condu£t,efpecially  in  my  reljgicus2,eai.--^Wgs 
aftervi^ards  much  perplex'd,  fo  that  I  could  not  Sleep  quietly. 

Lords-D^y,  March  11.  My  Soul  was  in  fome  Meafure 
>'?rf»^/^/«V/«GoD,inMorning-Devotion;  fo  that  I  wasreleas'd 
from  trembling  Fear  and  Diftren,..—  Preached  to  my  People 
from  the  Parable  of  the  Sew£r,  Matth.  xiii.  And  enjoyed  fomp 
Afliftance,  both  Parts  of  the  Day  :  Had  fome  Freedom,  Affec- 
tion, and  Fervency  in  addrefling  my  poor  People  ;  long*d  that 
God  Ihould  take  hold  of  their  Hearts, and  make  them  fpirftually 
alive.  And  indeed  I  had  fo  much  to  fay  to  them,  that  I  knew 
not  how  to  leave  ofF  (peaking.  * 

Monday,  March  12.  In  the  Morning,  was  in  a  devout,  ten- 
der, and  loving  Frame  of  Mind  ;  and  was  enabled  to  cry  to 
God,  I  hope,  with  a  Child-like  Spirit,  with  Importui#ty,  and 
Refignation,  and  Compofure  of  Mind.  My  Spirit  was  full  of 
Quietnefs,  and  Love  toMankind  ;  and  longed  thatPeace  fhoujd 
reign  on  theEarth  :  Was  grieved  at  the  very  Thoughts  of  2l  fiery  ^ 
angry  and  intemperate  TLeal  in  Religion  ;  mourn'd  over  paft 
Follies  in  thatRegard  ;  and  mySoul  confided  inGod  forStrength 
and  Grace  fufficient  for  my  future  Work  and  Trials.—  Spent 
the  Day  mainly  in  hard  Labour,  making  Preparation  for  my 
intended  Journey. 

Tuefday,  PAarch  13.  Felt  my  Soul  going  forth  after  God 
fometimcs  5  but  not  with  fuch  Ardency  as  I  longed  for.  In  the 
J^vening,  was  enabled  to  continue  injlani  in  Prayer^  for  fome 
confiderable  Time  together  5  and  efpecially  had  refpedt  to  the 
Journey  I  defigned  to  ent«r  upon,  with  the  Leave  of  divine 
Providence,  on  the  Morrow.  Enjoyed  fome  Freedom  and  Fer- 
vency, intreating  that  the  divine  Prefence  might  attend  me  in 


*  This  was  the  laft  Sabbath  that  ever  he  performed  publick 
Service  at  KGunaumsek^?x\d  thefe  the  laft  Sermcns  that  ever 
he  preached  there.  It  appears  by  his  Diary,  that  while  he 
continued  with  thefe  Indians^  he  took  great  Pains  with 
them,anddid  it  with  much  Difcretion  ;  But  the  parliculajT 
M^nefj  how,  has  been  omitted  fw  Brevity's  ^?^k^, 

P  ever) 


104     -^/.  26.  "the  LIFE 

every  Plaa  where  my  Bufmefs  might  lead  me  ;  and  had  3  par* 
ticuJar  Reference  to  the  Trials  and  Temptations  that  I  appre- 
hended I  might  be  more  eminently  expofed  to  in  particular 
'  Places,  Was  ftrengihen'd  and  comforted  ;  altho*  I  was  before 
very  v/eary.     Truly  the  Joy  of  de  Lord  is  Strength  and  Life, 

Wednefday,  March  14.  Knjoy'd  feme  Intenfenefs  of  Soul 
in  Prayer,  repeating  my  Petitions  for  God's  Prefence  in  every 
f  iace  where  I  expedled  to  be  in  my  Journey.  Befought  theLord 
that  I  might  not  be  too  much  pleafed  and  amufed  with  dear 
Friends  andAcquaintancc,  in  onePlace  and  another.---  Near  lO 
fet  out  on  my  Journey,  anH  near  Night  came  to  Stockbridge, 

Thurfday^  March  15.  Rode  down  to  Sheffield,  Here  I  met 
a  MefTenger  from  Eaji- Hampton  on  Long-l/Jand  ;  who,  hy  the 
unanimous  Vote  of  that  large  Town,  was  fent  to  invite  me  thi- 
ther,in  order  to  fettle  with  that  People, where  I  had  been  befor© 
frequently  invited.  Scem'd  more  at  aLofs  what  was  my  Duty, 
than  before  ;  when  I  heard  of  the  greatDifficulties  of  rhatPJace^ 
I  was  much  concerned  and  grieved,  and  felt  fome  Dcfires  to 
comply  with  their  Requefl  j  but  knew  not  what  to  do  :  En- 
deavourfti  to  commit  the  Cafe  to  God. 

[  The  two  nextDaySjhe  went  no  further  (h^nSalifbury^  being 
much  hinder'd  by  the  Rain.  When  he  came  there,  he  was 
much  indifpofed.--  He  fpeaks  of  comfortable  and  profitable 
Converfation  with  Chriftian  P>iends,  on  thefe  Days.] 

LordVDay,  Jkl^rch  iS.  [  At  Saiifiury,  ]  Was  exceeding 
weak  and  faint,  fo  that  I  cculd  fcarce  walk  :  But  God  was  pleaf- 
ed to  aitbrd  me  much  Freedom,  Clearnefs  and  Fervency  in 
Preaching  :  I  have  not  had  the  like  AfTiilance  in  Preaching  to 
Sinners  for  many  Months  paf^.  --Here another  Meflenger  met 
me,  and  informed  me  of  the  V^ote  of  another  Congregation,  to 
give  me  an  Invitation  to  come  among  them  upon  Probation  for 
Settlement.  *  Was  fomething  exercifcd  inMind  with  aWeight 
and  Burden  of  Care,  O  that  God  would  fend  forth  faithful 
Labour  en  into  his  Harvefu 

^  \  After  this,  he  went  forward  on  his  Journey  towards  IsJcw- 
York  i^ndNeW'Jerfey  :  In  which  he  proceeded  flowiy  ;  perform- 
i-ng  his  Journey  unjder -great  Degrees  of   bodily   Indifpofttiono 


*  This  Congregation  was  that  at  MHUngton,  near  Ha^dam, 
They  were  very  earneftly  defirous  of  his  coming  among 
them,  '  How- 


of  Mr,  David  Bralnerd.     A.D.  1744^      105 

IJowever,  be  preachM  feveral  Times  by  the  Way,  being  urged 
by  Friend  ;  in  which  he  had  confiderable  Affiftance.  He 
fpeaks  of  Comfort  in  Convcrfation  with  Chriftian  Fr.ends,  from 
Time  to  Time,  and  of  various  Things  in  the  Exercifes  and 
Frames  ot  his  Heart,  that  fhew  much  of  a  divine  Influence  on 
his  Mind  in  this  Journey  :  But  yetc  omplains  of  theThtng  that 
he  fear' d  viz-  a  Decline  of  his  fpiritual  Life,  or  Vivacity  m 
Rdieion,  by  Means  of  his  conftant  Removal  from  Place  to 
Place,  and  want  of  Retirement ;  and  complains  bitterly  of  his 
Unworthinefs,  Deadnefs,  ^c.^-  He  came  to  l^ew-iork  on 
Wednefday,  March  28.  And  to  Elizabeth-Town  on  the  Satur- 
day following,  where  itfeems  he  waited  'till  the  Commiflioners 

came  together.]  -..Txr    t 

Thurfday,  April  5.  Was  agam  much  exercifed  with  Weak- 
nefs,  and  with  Pain  in  my  Head.  Attended  on  the Cominiffio- 
ners  in  their  Meeting.  *  Refolved  to  go  onftili  with  the  Indtan 
AfFair  if  divine  Providence  permitted  -,  altho'  I  had  before  felt 
fome  Inclination  to  go  to  Eajl-Hampioriy  where  I  was  folicited 

°  pAfter  this,  he  continued  two  or  three  Days  in  the  Jerfeys^ 
very  ill  ;  and  then  returned  to  New-Tor k  ;  and  from  thence  into 
JSIeiQ-  England  5  and  went  to  his  nativeTown  of  Haddam  :  where 


*  The  IndiuHS  at  Kaunaumeek  being  but  few  inNumber,and 
Mr.  Brainerd  having  now  been  labouring  among  them  about 
a  Year,  and  having  prevailed  upon  them  to  be  willing  to 
leave  Kaunaumeek,  and  remove  to  Stockbridge,  to  live  con- 
ftantly  undcrMr.^flr^^flffit'sMiniftry  ;  he  thought  he  might 
DOW  do  more  Service  for  Chrift  among  the  Miam  clfe- 
where  :  And  therefore  went  this  Journey  to  New-Jerjey 
to  lay  the  Matter  before  the  CommiiHoners ;  who  met  at 
Elizabeth^Town,  on  this  Occafion,  and  determined  that 
he  fhould  forthwith  leave  Kaunaumsek,  and  go  to  the  De- 
iaware  Indians*  ,  . 

4  By  the  Invitations  Mr.  Brainerd  had  lately  received,  M 
appears,  that  it  was  not  from  Necefrity,or  for  want  of  Op- 
portunities to  fettle  in  the  Miniftry  amongft  ihttngUJb, 
iiQtwithftanding  theDifgrace  he  had  been  laid  under  at6./- 
/^^^,  that  lie  was  determine^-l^orfake  all  the  outward 
Commons  to  be  enioyed  in --ie\E«^^>  Settlements,  to  go 
and  fpend  his  Life 'iioioog  the  brutifh  Savag^i,  and  endure 


he  arrived  on  Saturday,  JJpril  14. —  And  he  continues  fiill  hij 
bitter  Complaints  of  want  of  Retirement.  While  he  was  in 
Nnu-Tork,  he  fays  thus,  "  Oh,  'tis  not  the  Plea/ures  of  the 
*'  World  can  Comfort  me  !  2/ God  deny  his  Pre  fence,  what  an 
««  the  Pleafures  of  the  City  to  me?  One  Hour  of  fweet  Retire- 
<«  ment  where  God  is,  is  better  than  the  whole  IVorld.'^  And  he 
continues  to  cry  out  of  his  Ignorance,  Meannefs,  and  Unwor- 
thmefs.  However,  he  fpeaks  of  fome  Seafons  of  fpecial  Affift- 
^nce  and  divine  Sweetnefs.—  He  fpent  fome  Days  among  his 
Friends  at  Ea/i- Hampton  and  Millington.] 

Tued^Yy  jprii  ij.  Rode  to  Millington  again  ;  and  felt 
perplex'd  when  1  fet  out ;  Was  feeble  in  Body,  and  weak  in 
f'aith.  I  was  going  to  preach  a  Le6ture  ;  and  fear'd  I  fhould 
jiever  have  Allifiance  enough  to  get  thro*.  But  contriving  to 
ride  alone,  at-  a  Diftance  from  the  Company  that  was  going,  X 
fpent  the  Time  in  lifting  up  my  Heart  to  Gcd  :  Had  not  gone 
far  before  mySoul  was  abundantlyftrengthen'd  withthofcV/ords, 


the  Difficulties  and  Self-denials  of  an  Indian  Mijfton.  He 
bad,  juit  as  he  was  leaving  Kaunaumeeky  had  an  earneft  In- 
vitation to  a  Settlement  THiEaft- Hampton  on  Long- JJIandyihc 
faireft  pleafanteft  Town  on  the  whole  Ifland,and  one  of  its 
largeft  and  moft  wealthy  Parifties.  The  People  there  were 
unanimous  in  their  Defires  to  have  him  for  their  Paftor, 
and  for  a  long  Time  continued  in  an  earncft  Purfuit  of 
what  they  defired,  and  were  hardly  brought  to  relinquifh 
theirEndeavours  and  give  up  theirHopes  of  obtaining  him. 
Befides  thelnvitation  he  had  ioMillingion  ;  which  was  near 
bis  native  Town,  and  in  the  midft  of  his  Friends.  Nor 
did  Mr.  Braincrd  chufe  the  Bufmefs  of  a  MilHonary  to  the 
Indian,  rather  than  accept  of  thofe  Ijivitations,  becaufe  he 
was  unacquainted  with  the  Difficulties  andSufferings  which 
attended  fuch  aService  :  for  he  had  hadExperience  of  thefe 
Difficulties  in  Summer  and  Winter  ;  having  fpent  about  a 
Twelve- Month  in  a  lonely  Defert  among  thefe  Savages, 
where  he  bad  gone  through  extream  Hardfhips,  and  been 
theSubjecl  of  aTrain  of  outward  and  in wardSorrows, which 
were  now  frefh  in  his  Mind,  Notwithflanding  all  thefe 
Things,  he  chofe  fliJl  to  go  on  with  thij  Bufinefs ;  and 
that  al(ho*  the  Place  he  was  now  going  to,  was  at  a  flill 
much  greater  Diftance  from  moft  ef  his  Friends^  Acquain- 
tance, and   natJve   Land^ 

1/ 


of  Mr,  David  Brainerd.     A.D.1744.       107 

IfGoii  he  for  us,  who  can  be  againft  us  P  I  went  on,  confiding 
in  God  ;  and  fearing  nothing  fo  much  as  Self-Confidence.  In 
this  Frame  I  went  to  the  Houfe  of  God,  and  enjoyed  fo  me 
Affiftance.  Afterwards  felt  the  Spirit  of  Love  and  Meeknefs  in 
Converfation  with  fome  Friends.  Then  rode  Home  to  my 
Brother's  :  And  in  the  Evening,  Tinging  Hymns  with  Friends, 
my  Soul  feem'd  to  melt :  And  in  Prayer  afterwards, enjoyed  the 
Exercife  of  Faiih^znd  was  enabled  to  be  fertj^nt  inspirit :  Found 
more  of  God's  Prefence,  than  I  have  done  any  Time  in  my  late 
wearifom  Journey.  Eternity  appcar'd  very  near  :  My  Nature 
was  very  weak,  and  feem'd  ready  to  be  dilTolved  :  The  Sun 
declining,  and  the  Shadows  of  the  Evening  drawing  on  apace. 
O I  long'd  to  fill  up  the  remaining  Moments  all  forGod  !  Tho' 
my  Bo6y  was  fo  fe-eble,  and  wearied  with  Preaching,  and  much 
private  Converfation,  yet  I  wanted  to  fit  up  all  Night  to  da 
fomething  for  God.  To  God,  the  Giver  of  thefe  Refreftiments, 
be  Glory  forever  and  ever  ;  Amen. 

Wednefday, -^przV  18.  Was  very  weak,  and  enjoyed  but 
little  fpiritualComfort.  Was  exercifed  withOne  cavilling  againfl 
Original  Sin,  May  the  Lord  open  his  Eyes  to  fee  the  Fountain 
of  Sin  in  himfelf. 

[  After  thi»,  he  vifited  feveral  Minifters  in  Conneaicut  ;  and 
then  travelled  towards  Kaunaumeek,  and  came  to  Mr.  Sergeant's 
Sit  Stockbridgey  Thurfday,  April  j6.  He  performed  this  Journey 
in  a  very  weak  State  of  Body.  The  Things  he  fpeaks  of  in 
the  meanTime,  appertaining  to  the  Frames  and  Exercifes  of  his 
Mind,are  at  fome  Times  Deadnefs  and  a  being  void  of  fpiritual 
Comfort,  at  other  Times  refling  in  God,  fpiritual  Sweetnefs  in 
Converfation,  Engagednefs  in  Meditation,  on  the  Road,  Affift- 
ance in  Preaching,  Rejoycing  to  think  that  {o  much  more  of 
his  Work  was  done,and  he  fo  much  nearer  to  the  eternalWorld. 
And  he  once  and  again  fpeaks  of  a  Senfe  of  great  Ignorance, 
fpiritual  Pollution  ^c."] 

Friday  and  Saturday,  Jpril  27,  and  28.  Spent  fome  Time 
in  viliting  Friends,  and  difcourfing  with  my  People  (who  were 
now  moved  down  from  their  own  Place  to  Mr. Sargeant's)  and 
found  thera  very  glad  to  fee  me  returned.  Was  Exercis'd  in  my 
Mind  with  a  Senfe  of  my  own  Unworthlnefs. 

Lord's-Day,  Jpril  29.  Preach'd  for  Mr.  Sargeant, hothF^ts 
©f  the  Day,  from  Rev»  xiv,  4.  Enjoyed  fome  Freedom  in 
Preaching,  tho*  not  much  Spirituality.  In  the  Evening,  my 
Heart  was  in  fome  Meafure  lifted  up  in  Tftankfukcfs  to  God 
for  any  Aiiiftance^. 

Moisdaji 


xo8    ^/.  27.  r^^LIFE 

Monday,  Jpril  30.  Rode  toKaunaumsd^hut  was  extreamly 
111 :  Did  not  enjoy  the  Comfort  I  hoped  for  in  my  own  Houfe. 

Tuefday,  May  i.  Having  received  new  Orders  to  go  to  a 
Number  of  Indians  on  Delaware  River  in  Penfylvania^  and  my 
People  here  being  moftly  removed  to  Mr.  Sergeant'By  I  this  Day 
took  all  my  Cloaths,  Books,  i^c.  and  difpofed  of  them,  and  fet 
out  for  Delaware  River  :  But  made  it  my  Way  to  return  toMr. 
Sargeant's  :  Which  I  did  this  Day,  juft  aiNight.  Rodefeveral 
Hours  in  the  Rain  thro*  the  howling  Wildernefs,  altho*  I  was 
fo  difordered  in  Body,  that  little  or  nothing  but  Blood  came 
from  me. 

[  He  continued  at  Stockhid^e^thc  next  Day  ;  and  on  Thurf- 
day  rode  a  little  Way,  to  Sheffield^  under  a  great  Degree  of 
lllnefs  ;  but  with  Encouragement  andChearfulnefs  of  Mind  un- 
der his  Fatigues.  On  Friday,  he  rode  to  Salifiury,  and  con- 
tinued there  'till  after  the  Sabbath.  He  fpeaks  of  hisSoul's  being, 
fome  Part  of  this  Time,  refrefh'd  in  Converfation  with  fome 
Chriflian  Friends,  about  their  heavenly  Home  and  their  Journey 
thither.  At  other  Times,  he  fpeaks  of  himfelf  as  exceedingly 
perplexed  with  Barrennefs  and  Deadncfs,  and  has  this  Exclama- 
tion, Oh,  that  Time  Jhould  pafs  with  fo  little  done  for  God  /—On 
Monday,  he  rode  to  Sharon  ;  and  fpeaks  ©f  himfelf  as  diftrefs'd 
at  the  Confideration  of  the  Mifimprovement  of  Time.] 

Tuefday,  Moy  8.  Set  out  from  Sharon  in  Conne^icut^  and 
travelJed  about  45  Miles  to  a  Place  called  the  Fijh-Kiiy  f  and 
lodg'd  there.  Spent  much  of  my  Time,while  riding,in  Prayer, 
that  God  w»uld  go  with  me  to  Delaware.  My  Heart  fometimes 
was  ready  to  fink  with  the  Thoughts  of  my  Work,  and  going 
alone  in  the  Wildernefs,  I  knew  not  where  :  But  flili  it  was 
comfortable,to  think,  that  others  of  God'sChildren  had  wander^ 
ed  about  in  Caves  and  Dens  of  the  Earth  ;  and  .Abraham,  when 
he  was  called  to  go  forth,  went  out  not  knowing  whither  he  went* 
O  that  I  might  follow  after  God. 

[  The  next  D^y,  he  went  forward  on  his  Journey  ;  crofsM 
Iiudfon*s  River,  and  Vv^ent  to  GiiP)en  in  the  Highlands  ;  and  fo 
travelled  a-crofs  the  Woods,  (rom Hud/on' s  River  to  Delaware^ 
about  an  100  Miles,  through  a  defulate  and  hideous  Country, 
above  New-Jerfty  ;  v;here  were  very  fewScttlements  :  In  which 
Journey  he  fuffefed  much  Fatigue  and  Hardfhip.     He  vifited 


t  A  Place  fo  called  in  'New-York Governmcntjncar  HudjonH 
River i  on  the  VV eft  fide  of  the  River. 

fome 


of  Mr,  David  Bralnerd,    A.D.1744':     109 

fomS  Indians  in  the  Way,  t  and  difcourfed  with  them  conccrn- 
ingChriftianity.  Was  confiderably  Melancholy  andDifconfolate, 
being  alone  in  a  ftrange  Wildernefs.  On  Saturday,  he  came 
to  a  Settlement  of  Iri/h  and  Dutch  People,about  12  Miles  above 
the  Forks  of  Delaware.  ] 

Lord's- Day,  Ma^  13.  Rofe  early  :  Felt  very  poorly  after  my 
long  Journey,  and  after  being  wet  and  fatigued.  Was  very 
Melancholy  ;  have  fcarce  ever  feen  fuch  a  gloomy  Morning  in 
my  Life  ;  there  appeared  to  be  no  Sabbath ;  the  Children  were 
all  at  Play  ;  I  a  Stranger  in  the  Wildernefs, and  knew  not  where 
to  go  ;  and  all  Circumftances  feem'd  to  confpire  to  render  my 
AfFairsdark  and  difcouraging.  Was  difappointed  refpeiling  aa 
Interpreter^  and  heard  that  ihe Indians  were  much  fcatter'd,  &c. 
Oh,  I  mourned  after  the  Prefence  of  God,  and  feem'd  like  a 
Creature  banifh'd  from  his  Sight  !  Yet  he  was  pleafed  to  fupport 
my  finking  Soul,  amidft  all  my  Sorrows  ;  fo  that  I  never  enter- 
tained any  Thought  of  quitting  my  Bufinefs  among  the  poor 
Indians;  but  was  comforted,  to  think,  that  Death  would  'ere 
long  fet  me  free  from  thefeDiftrefTes.-—  Rode  about  3  or  4  Miles 
to  the  Jrijh  Peeple,  where  I  found  feme  that  appeared  Sober  and 
concerned  about  Religion.  My  Heart  then  began  to  be  a  little 
encouraged  :  VVent  and  preach'd,  firfl  to  the  Jri/b,  and  then  to 
the  Jndians :  And  in  the  Evening,  was  a  little  comforted  ;  my 
Soul  feem'd  to  reft  on  God,  and  take  Courage.  O  that  the  Lord 
would  be  my  Support  and  Comforter  in  an  Evil  World. 

Monday,  May  14.  Was  very  bufy  in  fome  neceflary  Studies, 
Felt  my  felf  very  loofe  from  all  the  World  :  All  appeared Fj«//v 
end  Vexation  of  Spirit.  Seem'd  fomething  loncfom  and  difcon- 
folate,  as  if  1  was  banifli'd  from  all  Mankind, and  bereaved  of  all 
that  is  called  pleafurable  in  the  World  :  But  appeared  to  my 
felf  fo  vile  and  unworthy,  it  feem'd  fitter  for  me  to  be  here  than 
any  where. 

Tuefday,  May  15.  •  Still  much  engaged  in  my  Studies ;  and 
enjoyed  more  Health,  than  I  have  forfomeTime  pafl  :  But  was 
fomething  dejected  in  Spirit  with  a  Senfe  of  my  Meannefs  ; 
feem'd  as  if  1  could  never  do  any  Thing  at  aJI  to  any  good  Pur- 
pofe  by  Reafon  of  Ignorance  and  Folly.  O  that  a  Senfe  of  ihefe 
Things  might  work  more  habitual  Humility  in  my  Soul. 


f  See  Mr.  Brainerd*s  Narrative  in  a  Letter  to  Mr.  Pemherton^ 
at  the  the  End  of  his  Oidinstion-Sermon,—  Pa^e  32,  33. 

I  tie 


[  He  continued  much  in  the  fame  Frame  the  next  Day.] 

Thurfday,  May  17.  Was  this  Day  greatly  diftrefs'd  with  a 
Senfe  o/my  Vilenefs :  Appeared  to  my  felf  too  bad  to  walk  on 
(god's  Earth,  or  to  be  treated  with  Kiifdnefs  by  any  of  hisCrea- 
tures.  God  was  pleafed  to  let  me  fee  my  inward  Pollution  and 
Corruption,  to  fuch  a  Degree,  that  I  aknoft  defpair'd  of  being 
made  holy  :  Oh  !  wreUhid  Man  that  1  am  !  U^ho  /hall  deliver 
me  from  the  Body  of  this  Death?  In  the  Afternoon,  met  with 
the  Indians  according  to  Appointment,  and  preach'd  to  them* 
And  while  riding  to  them,  my  Soul  feem'd  to  confide  in  God  5 
and  afterwards  had  fome  Relief;  and  Enlargement  (Jf  Soul  in 
Prayer,  and  fome  AfHflance  in  the  Duty  of  Interccflion  :  Vital 
Piety  and  Holinefs  appear'd  fweet  to  me,  and  I  longed  for  the 
Ferfe£tion  of  it. 

Friday,  May  18.  Felt  again  fomething  of  the  fweet  Spirit  of 
Religion  ;  2nd  my  Soul  feera'd  to  confide  in  God5that  he  would 
never  leave  me.—  But  oftentimes  faw  my  felf  fo  mean  a  Crea- 
ture, that  I  knew  not  hovi^  to  think  of  Preaching.  O  that  I 
could  alv.'ays  live  to  and  vpon  GoD. 

Saturday,  May  19.  "Was,  fome  Part  of  the  Time,  greatly 
cpprefs'd  with  the  vVeight  andBurden  of  my  Work  :  It  feem'd 
impoiTible  for  me  ever  to  go  thro'  with  the  Bufinefs  I  had  under- 
takes.—TowardsNight, was  very  calm  and  comfortable  3  And  I 
think,  my  Soul  trufted  in  God  for  Help. 

Lord's-Day,  May  20.  Preach'd  twice  to  the  poor  Indians.^ 
and  enjoyed  (ovnt  Freedom  in  fpeaking,  while  I  attempted  to 
remove  theirPrejudices  againfl  Chriftianity.  My  Soul  longed  for 
AfTiftance  from  above,  all  the  while  ;  for  I  faw  1  had  no  Strength 
fnfiicient  for  that  Work.  Afterwards,  preach'd  to  the  Irijk 
People  :  Was  much  affifted  in  the  firft  Prayer,  and  fomething  in 
Sermon.  Several Terfons  feem'd  much  concerned  for  their  Souls, 
with  whom  Idifcourfed  afterwards  with  much  Freedom  and 
fome  Power.  Blefied  be  GvnJ  for  any  AfHfiance  afforded  to  art 
unworthy  Worm.     O  tkat  I  could  live  to  him  I 

[  Thro*  the  reft  of  this  Week,  He  vvas  fometimes  ready  to 
fink  with  a  Senfe  of  hi«  unworthinefs  and  unfitncfs  for  the  Work 
of  the  Miniftry  ;  and  fome'iroes  encouraged  and  lifted  above 
his  Fears  and  Sorrows,  and  was  enabled  confidently  to  rely  on 
God  ;  and  efpecialiy  on  Saturday,  towards  Night,  he  enjoyed 
Calmnefs  and  Compof'ure,  aiid  Afliffance  in  Prayer  to  God. 
He  rejoyced  (as  he  fays)  That  Gcd  remains  unchangeably  powerful 
and  faithful^  a  fure  and  fufficier,t  Poriioriy  and  the  DiveUing- Place 
cf  his  Childrin  in  aUCsnirati^ns-^  Lord's* 


of  Mr,  David  Brainerd.         A.D.  1 744:    1 1  i 

Lord's- Day,  May  27.  Vifited  my  Indians^  in  theMominor, 
and  attended  upon  zPuneral  among  them  :  Was  afFe£ted  to  fee 
their  heaihenijh  Praiiices.  O  that  they  might  be  turned  from 
Dsrknefs  to  Light,  Afterwards,  got  a  confiderable  Number 
of  them  together,  and  preach'd  to  them  ;  and  obferved  them 
Very  attentive.  After  this,  preach'd  to  the  White  People  from 
Meh.  ii.  3.  Was  enabled  to  fpeak  with  fome  Freedom  and 
Power  :  Several  People  fecm'd  much  concerned  for  theirSouIs ; 
efpecially  one  who  had  been  educated  a  Roman  Catholick. 
BlefTed  be  the  Lord  for  any  Help. 

Monday,  May  28.  Set  out  from  the  Indians  above  the 
Forks  of  Delaware,  on  a  Journey  towards  Newark  in  New- 
Jerjey,  according  to  my  Orders.  Rode  thro*  the  Wildernefs  ; 
was  much  fatigued  with  the  Heat ;  lodged  at  a  Place  called 
Black-River  -,  v/as  exceedingly  tired  and  worn  out. 

[  On  Tuefday,  he  came  to  Newark  :  The  next  Day,  went 
to  Eli  [ah  eth 'Town  :  On  Thurfday,  he  went  toNew-Tork  ;  and 
on  Friday  returned  to  Jilifabeth-Town,  Thefe  Days  were 
fpent  in  fome  Perplexity  of  Mind.  Pie  continued  at  Elifabeth- 
Town  'tillFridayin  theWeek  following  .Wasenliven'd,refrefh*d 
and  ftrengthen'd  on  the  Sabbath  at  theLord'sTable.The  enfuing 
Days  of  the  Week  were  fpent  chiefly  in  Studies  preparatory  to 
his  Ordination  ;  and  on  fome  of  them  he  Teemed  to  have  much 
of  God's  gracious  Prefence,  and  of  the  fw^eet  Influences  of 
his  Spirit ;  but  was  in  a  very  weak  State  of  Body,  On  Satur- 
day, he  rode  to  Newark.'] 

Lord's-Day,  June  10.     [  at  Newark]  In  the  Morning,wa3 
much  concerned  how  I  ftiould  perform  the  Work  of  the  Day  ; 
and  trembled  at  the  Thoughts  of  being  left  to  my  felf.— -  En- 
joyed very  confiderable  Affiftance  in  all  Parts  of  the  publick 
Service.     Had  an  Opportunity  again  to  attend  on  the  Ordinance 
of  the  Lord's-Supper,  and  thro*  divine  Goodnefs  was  refrefh'd 
in  it :  My  Soul  was  full  of  Love  and  Tendernefs  towards  the 
Children  of  God,  and  towards  all  Men  :  Felt  a  certain  Sweet- 
ncfs  Of  Dirpofition  towards  every  Creature.     At  Night,  I  en- 
joyed more  Spirituality,  and  fweet  Defire  of  Holinefs,   than  I 
have  felt  for   fome  Time  :  Was  afraid  of  every  Thought  and 
every  Motion  Jeft  thereby  myHeart  fliould  be  drawn  away  from 
God.     O  that  I  might  never  leave  the  blefied  God.     Lord,  in 
thy  Prefence  ii  Fulnefs  of  Joy.     O    the  BleiTednefs  of  living  to 
God  ! 

Q^  Monday, 


112    Muif.  ne  LIFE 

Monday,  June  ii.  This  Day  ihtPrefbyUry  met  together  at 
iSlewark^  in  order  to  my  Ordinatkn,  Was  very  weak  and 
diforder*d  in  Body  ;  yet  endeiivoured  to  lepofe  my  Confidence 
in  God.  Spciit  moft  of  rhe  Day  alone;  efpecially  the  Fore- 
noon. At  three  in  the  Afternr  on  preach'd  my  Probation- Ser- 
mon, from  A6i.  xxvi.  17, 18.  being  a  Text  given  me  for  that 
End.  Felt  not  well,  either  in  Body  or  Mind  ;  hovi^ever,  God 
carried  me  thro'  rommrLably.  Afterwards,  pafs'd  an  Exami- 
nation before  the  Prefbncry.  Was  much  tired,  and  my  Mind 
burden'd  with  the  Greatnefs  of  that  Charge,  [  was  in  the  mofl 
folemn  Manner  about  to  take  upon  me  :  My  Mind  was  fo 
prefs'd  with  the  Weight  of  the  Work  incumbent  upon  me,  that 
I  could  not  Heep  this  Night,  tho'  very  weary  and  in  great  need 
of  Refl. 

Tuefday,  June  12*  Was  this  Morning  further  examined, 
refpe£tingmy  Experimental  Acquaintance  with  Chriflianity.  * 
At  ten  o'clock  my  Ordination  was  attended  :  The  Sermon 
preach'd  by  the  Rev.  Mr.  Pemherton.  At  this  Time  I  was  af- 
fected v/ith  a  Senfe  of  the  important  Trull  committed  to 
me  ;  yet  was  Compofed,  and  folemn,  without  Diftradlion  .* 
And  I  hope,  I  then  (  as  many  Times  bufore)  gave  my  felt  up  to 
God, to  be  for  him,  and  not  for  another.  O  that  I  might  always 
be  engaged  in  the  Service  of  (lod^and  duly  remember  the  folemn 
Charge  I  have  receivei,  in  ihe  Prefence  of  God,  Angels  and 
Men  ;  Amen  :  May  I  b^  aiTifted  of,  God  for  this  Purpofe.— 
Towards  Night,  rode  to  El'fabeth-Toivn. 


Mr.  Pemherton,  in  a  Letter  to  the  Honourable  Society  in 
Scotland  that  employedMr.  Brainerd, which  he  wrote  con- 
cerning him,  (  publifhed  in  Scciland,\nthe  Chrijiian  month' 
ly  Hi/hry  )  writes  thus,  "  We  can  with  PJeafi.re  fay, that 
*'  Mr.  Brainerd  pafs'd  thro'  his  Ordination-Trials,  to  the 
«'  univerfal  Approbaf-rn  of  the  Pr/y^;;/^r^,  and  appeared 
*«  uncomnunlv  qualified  for  the  Work  of  the  Miniftry. 
«'  He  fceniG  to  be  armed  with  a  great  deal  of  Self-deniaJ, 
*«  and  animated  v/iih  a  noble  Zeal  to  propagate  the  Gofpel 
*<  among  tJufe  barbarous  Nations,  who  have  long  dwelt 
<*  in  the  Darknefs  of  Heathenifm. 


PART 


of  Mr*  David  Bralnerd.     A.D.  1 744,       1 1 3 

Part     VI. 

From  his  Ordination,  'till  he  firji  began  to 
preach  to  the  Indians  at  Crofweekfung, 
afnong  whom  he  had  his  mojl  remarkable 
Succefs. 


WEdnefday,  June  13.     Spent  fome  confiderable  Time  in 
writing  an  Actount  of  the  Indian  Affairs  to  go  to  Scot- 
land ',  fpent  fome  Time  in  Converfation  with  Friends  ; 
But  enjoy 'd  not  much  Sweetnefs  and  Satisfadtion. 

Thurfday,  June  14.  Received  fome  particular  Kindnefs  from 
Friends  ;  and  wondered,  that  God  fhould  open  the  Hearts  of 
any  to  treat  m€  with  Kindnefs  :  Saw  my  felf  to  be  unworthy  of 
any  Favour,frora  God,  or  any  of  my  Fellow- Men.  Was  much 
exercifed  with  Pain  in  my  Head  ;  however  determined  to  fet 
out  on  my  Journey  towards  Delaware  in  the  Afternoon  :  But 
in  theAfternoon  my  Pain  increafed  exceedingly  ;  fo  that  1  was  ob- 
liged to  bctajce  my  felf  to  theBed  ;  and  theNight  following, was 
greatly  diftr  efs'd  "withPain  andSicknefs :  Was  fometimes  almoft 
bereaved  of  the  Exercife  of  Reafon  by  the  Extremity  of  Pain. 
Continued  muchDiftrefs'd  'till  Saturday  ;  when  I  v/as  fome^hii^ 
relieved  by  an  Emetick  :  But  was  unable  to  walk  abroad  'till 
the  Monday  following,  in  the  Afternoon  ;  and  ftill  remained 
very  feeble.  I  often  admired  the  Goodnefs  of  God,  that  he 
did  not  fufFef  me  to  proceed  on  my  Journey  from  this  Place 
where  I  was  fo  tenderly  ufed,and  to  be  Sick  by  the  Way  among 
Strangers. —  God  is  very  gracious  to  me,  both  in  Health  and 
Sicknefs,  and  intermingles  much  Mercy  with  ail  my  AfHi£lions 
and  Toils.  Enjoyed  fome  Sweetnefs  in  Things  divine,  in  the 
midft  of  my  Fain  and  Weaknefs.  Ob,  that  I  cpuld  praife  the 
Lord. 

0^2  iQn 


:ii4      ^t.  27.  7;^^  LIFE 

[  On  Tuefday,  June  19.  He  fet  out  on  his  Journey  Home, 
and  in  three  Days  reached  his  Place,  near  the  Forks  of  Dela- 
ware. Performed  thejourney  under  much  Wcaknefs  of  Body  ; 
but  had  Comfort  in  his  Soul,  from  Day  to  Day  :  And  both  his 
Weaknefs  of  Body^and  Confolation  of  Mind  continued  through 
the  Week.] 

Lord's-Day,  June  24.  Extreamly  Feeble  ;  fcarce  able  to 
walk  :  However,  vifited  my  hdiansy  and  took  much  Pains 
to  infhu6t.them  :  Laboured  v/ith  Tome  that  were  much  difaf- 
Ud.t^  to  Chriflianity.  MyMind  was  much  burden'd  with  the 
Weight  and  DifHculty  of  my  Work.  My  whole  Dependance 
and  Hope  of  Succefs  feemM  to  be  on  (god  s  who  alone  1  faw 
could  make  them  willing  to  receive  Inflrudion.  <My  Heart 
was  much  engaged  in  Prayer, fending  up  filent  Requeftsto  God, 
even  while  I  was  fpeaking  to  them.  O  that  I  cculd  always  go 
in  the  Strength  of  the  Lord. 

Monday,  June  25.  Was  fomething  better  in  Health  than 
of  late  :  Was  able  to  fpend  a  confiderable  Part  of  the  Day  in 
Prayer  and  clofe  Studies.  Had  more  Freedom  and  Fervency  in 
Prayer  than  ufual  of  late  :  Efpecially  long'd  for  the  Prefence  of 
God  in  my  Work,  and  that  the  poor  Heathen  might  be  con- 
verted. And  in  Evening-Prayer  my  Faith  and  Hope  in  God 
were  much  raifed.  To  an  Eye  of  Reafon  every  Thing  that 
refpecis  the  Converfion  of  the  Heathen  is  as  dark  as  Midnight  ; 
and  yet  1  can't  but  hope  in  God  for  the  Accomplifnment  of 
fomething  glorious  among  them.  My  Soul  longed  much  for 
the  Advancemeat  of  the  Redeemer's  Kingdom  onEarth.  Was 
very  feaiful  left  I  fliould  admit  forne  vain  Thought,  and  fo  lofc 
the  Senfe  I  then  had  of  divine  Things.  O  for  an  abiding  hea- 
venly Temper   ! 

Tuefday,  June  26.  In  the  Morning,  my  Defires  feem*d  to 
fife, and  afccnd  up  freely  to  God.  Wss  bufy  mod  of  theDay  in 
tranflating  Prayers  into  the  Language  of  the  Delaware- Indians  : 
Met  with  areat  DiiEculty  by  Reafon  that  my  Interpreter  was 
altogether  unacquainted  with  theBufinefs.  But  tho'  I  was  much 
difcoaraged  with  the  extream  DiiKcuIty  of  that  Work,  yet 
God  fupported  me  ;  and  efpecially  in  the  Evening,  gave  me 
fwcet  Refrefhment :  [n  Prayer  my  Soul  was  enlarged,  and  my 
Faith  drawn  into  fenfible  Exercife  ;  was  enabled  to  cry  to  God 
for  my  poor  Indians ;  and  tho'  the  Work  of  their  Converfion 
appeared  impcJJibU  with  Man^  yet  with  God  I  faw  all  Things  wers 
^o£H>l(,     My  Faith  was  much  ftrengthenM,  by  obferving  the 

wonderful 


^/ilfr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1744,     115 

wonderful  Alliftance  God  afforded  his  Servants  Nekemiah  and 
Ezra^  in  reforming  his  People,  and  re-e(hblifhing  his  antient 
Church.  I  was  much  aflifted  in  Prayer  for  dear  Chriftian 
Friends,  and  for  others  that  I  apprehended  to  be  Chriftlefs  ; 
but  was  more  efpecially  concerned  for  the  poor  Heathen,  and 
thofe  of  my  own  Chaige  :  Was  enabled  to  be  inftant  in  Prayer 
for  them  ;  and  hoped  that  God  would  bow  the  Heavens  and 
come  down  for  their  Salvation.  It  feem'd  to  me,  there  could 
be  no  Impediment  fufEcient  to  obftrucl  that  glorious  Work, 
feeing  the  living  God,  as  I  ftrongly  hoped,  was  engaged  for  it. 
I  continued  in  a  folemn  Frame,  lifting  up  my  Heart  to  God  for 
Afliftance,  and  Grace,  that  1  might  be  more  mortified  to  this 
prefent  World,  that  my  whole  Soul  might  be  taken  up  conti- 
nually in  Concern  for  the  Advancement  of  Chrift's  Kingdom  : 
Longed  that  God  would  purge  me  more,  that  I  might  be  as  a 
chofen  Veflel  to  bear  hisName  among  the  Heathens.  Continued 
in  this  Frame  'till  I  drop'd  afleep. 

Wednefday,  June  27.  Felt  fomething  of  the  fame  folemn 
Concern,  and  Spirit  of  Prayer,  that  I  enjoy'd  laft  Night,  foon 
after  I  rofe  in  the  Morning. —  In  the  Afternoon,  rode  feveral 
Miles  to  fee  if  I  could  procure  any  Lands  for  the  poor  Indians^ 
that  they  might  live  together,  and  be  under  better  Advantages 
for  Inftrudlion.  While  I  was  riding,  had  a  deep  Senfe  of  the 
Greatnefs  and  Difficulty  of  my  Work  ;  and  my  Soul  feemed 
to  rely  wholly  upon  God  for  Succefs,  in  the  diligent  and  faith- 
ful ufe  of  Means.  Saw,  with  greatcft  Certainty,  that  the  Arm 
of  the  Lord  muft  be  revealed^  for  the  Help  of  thefe  poor  Hea- 
then, if  ever  they  were  delivered  from  the  Bondage  of  thePow- 
ers  of  Darknefs.  Spent  mofi:,of  the  Time,  while  riding,  in 
lifting  up  my  Heart  for  Grace  and  Afliftance. 

Thurfday,  June  28.  Spent  the  Morning,  in  reading  feveral 
Partsof  the  Holy  Scripture,  and  in  fervent  Prayer  for  my  /«- 
diam^  that  God  would  fet  up  his  Kingdom  among  them,  and 
bring  them  into  his  Church. —  About  nine,  I  withdrew  to 
Biy  ufual  Place  of  Retirement  in  the  Woods  5  and  there  again 
enjoyed  fome  Afliftance  in  Prayer.  My  great  Concern  was  for 
the  Converfion  of  the  Heathen  t(5  God  ;  and  the  Lord  helped 
me  to  plead  with  him  for  it.  Towards  Noon,  rode  up  to  the 
Jndiansy  in  order  to  preach  to  'em  ;  and  while  going,  my  Heart 
v/ent  up  to  God  in  Prayer  for  'em  ;  could  freely  tell  God,  He 
knew  that  the  Caufe  was  not  mine,  which  I  was  engaged  in  ; 
but  it  was  his  own  Caufe,  and  it  would  be  for  his  own  Glory  to 
convert  the  poor  Indians ;  And  bleflcd  be  GodjI  felt  no  Defire 

oi 


ii6     J?/.  27.  ITZ'fLIFE 

of  theirConverfion^that  I  might  rec€lveHo;iour  from  theWorld, 
as  being  the  Inftrumenc  of  it.  Had  feme  Freedom  in  fpeejcing 
to  the  Indians, 

[  The  next  Day,  he  fpeaks  of  fome  ferious  Concern  for  the 
Kingdom  of  the  ble/led  Redeemer  ;  but  complains  much  of 
Barrennefsj  Wandtings,  Inadtivity,  i^c.  ] 

Saturday,  June  30.  My  Soiil  was  njuch  Solemnized  in  read- 
ing God's  Word  ;  efpecially  the  ninth  Chapter  of  Daniel.  I  faw 
how  God  hajd  called  out  his  Servants  to  Prayer,  and  made  them 
wreftle  with  him,  when  he  d^figned  to  beftow  any  great  Mer- 
cy on  his  Church.  And  alas,  I  was  afhamed  of  my  fejf*,  to  think 
of  myDulnefs  and  Ina6tivity,when  there  feemed  to  be  fo  much  to 
do  for  the  upbuilding  of  Zion.  Oh,  how  does  Zion  lie  wafte^!  \ 
longed,  that  the  Church  of  God  might  be  enlarged  :  Was  ena- 
bled to  pray,  I  think,  in  Faith  :  My  Soul  feem*d  fenfibly  to 
confide  in  God,  and  was  enabled  to  wreftle  with  him.  After- 
wards, walk'd  Abroad  to  a  Place  of  fweet  Retirement,  and  en- 
joyed fame  AiTiftance  In  Prayer  again  :  Had  a  Senfe  of  my  great 
need  of  divine  Help,  and  felt  my  Soul  fenfibly  depend  on  God, 
BlefTed  be  God,  this  has  been  a  comfortable  Week  to  me. 

Lord's- Day  jfuly  i.  In  the  Morning,  was  perplexed  with 
wandring  vain  Thoughts :  Was  much  grieved,  judged  and 
condemned  my  felf  before  God.  And  Oh,  how  mifecable  did 
I  feel,  becaufe  f  could  not  live  toGod  !  At  ten,  rode  away  with 
a  heavy  Heart,  to  preach  to  my  Indians.  Upon  the  Road,  I 
attempted  to  lift  up  my  Heart  to  God  ;  but  v/as  infefted  with 
an  unfcttled  wandring  Frame  of  Mind  ;  and  was  exceeding 
reltbsfs  and  perplex'd,  and  fill'd  with  Shame  and  Confufion  be- 
fore God.  1  feem'd  to  my  felf  to  be  more  hrutifo  than  any  Man  ; 
and  thought,  none  deferved  to  be  cafi  out  of  God'%  Prefenceio 
much  as  I,  If  I  attempted  to  lift  up  my  Heart  toGod,  as  I 
frequently  did  by  the  VVay,  on  a  fudden,  before  [  was  aware, 
my  Thouahts  were  wandring  to  the  Ends  of  the  Earth  :  And  my 
Soul  was  fiird  with  Surprize  andAnxiety,  to  find  it  thus.  Thus 
alfo  afterl  came  to  iht Indians ^mvM'md  was  confufed  ;  and  I  felt 
nothing  fenfibly  of  that  fweet  Reliance  on  God,  that  my  Soul 
has  been  comforted  with  in  Days  pafl.  Spent  the  Forenoon  in 
this  Pofture  of  Mind,  and  prcach'd  to  the  Indians  without  any 
Heart.  In  the  Afternoon,  I  felt  ftill  barren,  when  I  began  to 
preach  ;  and  after  about  half  an  Hour,  I  feem'd  to  my  felf  to 
know  nothing,  and  to  have  nothing  to  f^«y  to  the  Indians ;  but 

fotn 


of  Mr,  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  s  744,     1 1 7 

foon  after,  1  found  in  my  felf  a  Spirit   of  Love,  and  Warmth^ 
and  Power  to  addrefs  the  poor  Indians  ;    and  God  helped  me 
to  plead  with  them  to    turn  from  all  the  Vamim  of  the  Heathen^ 
to  the  living  God  :  And  I  am  perfwaded,  the  Lord  touched  their 
Confciences  ;   fori  never  faw fuch  Attention  raifed  in  thera  be- 
fore.    And   wheh  I  came   away  from  them,  I  fpent  the  whole 
Time  whiJe  1  was  riding  to  my  Lodgings,  three  Miles  diflant, 
in  Prayer  and  Praife  to  God.     And  after  I  had  rode  more  than 
two  Miles,  it  came  into  my  Mind  to  dedicate  my  felf  to  God 
again  ;  which  I  <Jid  with  great  Solemnity,  and   unfpeakable 
Satisfadion  ;  efpecially  gave  up  my  felf  to  him  renewedly  in 
the  Work  of  the  Miniftry.       And  this  I  did   by  divine  Grace, 
I  hope,    without  any  Exception  or  Referve  ;  not  in   theleaft 
fhrinking  back  from  any  Difficulties,   (hat  might  attend  this 
great  and  blefTed   Work.     I  feem'd  to  be  moft  free,  chearful, 
and  full  in  this  Dedication  of  my  felf.     My  whole  Soul  cried, 
«<   Lord,  to  thee  I  dedicate  my  felf  :  O  accept  of  me,  and  let 
'<  me  be  thine  forever.     Lord,  1  defire  nothing  elfe  ;  I   defire 
*'  nothing  more.  O  come,  come.  Lord,  accept  a  poor  Worm. 
'«   fj^hom  have  1  in   Heaven^  but  thee  ;  and  there  is   none  upon 
«'   Earthy  that  1  defire  hefidcs  thee^   After  this,  was  enabled  to 
praife  God   with  my    whole  Soul,  that  he  had  enabled  me  to 
devote  and  confecrate  all  myPowers  to  him  in  this  foIemnMan- 
ner.     My  Heart  rejoyced  in  my  particular  Work  as  a  Miffio- 
nary  ;  rejoyced  in  myNecefTiiy  of  Self-denial  in  manyRefpedts  ; 
and  itill  continued  to  give  up  my  felf  to  God,  and  implore  Mer- 
cy of  hirst  ;  praying  incefHintiy,  every  Moment,   \ni\\  fweet 
Fervency.     My  Nature  being  vexy  weak  of  late,    and  much 
fpeot,  was    now  confiderably  overcome  :  My    Fingers  grew 
very    feeble,   and  fomev./h^t  numb  ;    fo  that  I  could    fcarcely 
Itretch  them  out  ftreight  :  And  when  I  ligh.ted  from  my  Horfe, 
could  hardly  walk  :  My  Joints  feem'd  all  to  be  loofed.     But  I 
felt   abundant    Strergth  in   the  inner  Man.     Preach'd    to  the 
White  People  :  God  helped   me  much,   efpecially  in  Prayer. 
Sundry  of  my  poor  Indians  were  fo  moved  as  to  com.e  to  Meet- 
ing alfo  ;   and  one  appeare-d  much  concerned. 

Monday,  July  2.  Had  fome  Reliai  of  the  divine  Comforts 
of  Yeflerday  ;  but  could  no-t  get  that  VVarnith  and  Exercifc  of 
Faith,  that  I  defired.  Had  fometimes  a  diflrefTing  Senfe  of  my 
paft  Follies,  and  prefent  ignorance  and  Barrennefs :  And 
efpecially  in  the  Afte-rnoon,  was  funk  down  under  a  Load  of 
Sin  and  Guilt,  in  that  I  had  lived  fo  little  to  God, after  his  abun- 
dant Goodnefs  to  me  Yefierday.     In  the  Eveniflg,  tho'  very 

weak} 


ii8       MLif.  The   LIFE 

weak,  was  enabled  to  pray  with  Fervency,  and  to  continue  inr 
ftant  in  Prayer,  near  an  Hour.  My  Soul  mourned  over  the 
Power  of  its  Corruption,  and  longed  exceedingly  to  be  waP)'d 
and  purged  as  with  HyJJop,  Was  enabled  to  pray  for  my  dear 
abfent  Friends,  Chrift's  Minifters,  and  hisChurch  5  and  enjoyed 
much  Freedom  and  Fervency,  but  not  fo  much  Comfort,  by 
Reafon  of  Guilt  andShamc  beforeGod.—- Judged  and  condemned 
my  felf  for  the  Follies  of  the  Day. 

Tuefday,  July  3.  Was  ftill  very  weak.  This  Morning, 
was  enabled  to  pray  under  a  feeling  Senfe  of  my  need  of  Help 
from  God, and,  J  truf^,  had  feme  Faith  inExercife  ;  andjblefled 
be  God,  was  enabled  to  plead  with  God  a  confiderable  Time. 
Truly  God  is  good  to  me.  But  my  Soul  mourned  and  was 
grieved  at  my  Sinfulnefs  and  Barrennefs,  and  long'd  to  be  more 
engaged  for  God.  Near  nine,  withdrew  again  for  Prayer  ;  and 
thro*  divine  Gcodnefs,  had  the  blefTed  Spirit  of  Prayer;  my 
Soul  Icved  the  Duty,  and  longed  for  God  in  it.  O  it  is  fweet 
to  be  ihe  Lord's^  to  be  fenfibly  devoted  to  him  !  What  a  blefTed 
Portion  is  QoA  \  How  glorious,  how  lovely  in  himfelf  I  O 
my  Soul  long'd  to  improve  Time  wholly  for  God  !—  Spent 
moft  of  the  Day  \n  iranflating  Prayers  into  Indian,—  In  the 
Evening,  was  enabled  again  to  wreflle  with  God  in  Prayer  with 
Fervency.  Was  enabled  to  maintain  a  Self-diiEdent  and  watch- 
ful Frame  of  Spirit,  in  the  Evening,  and  was  jealous  and  afraid 
left  I  fhouid  admit  Carelefncfs  and  Self- Confidence. 

[  The  next  Day,  he  feems  to  have  had  fpecial  AlTiflance  and 
Fervency  moft  of  the  Day^but  in  a  lefs  Degree  than  the  proceed- 
ing Day.  Thurfday  was  fpent  in  great  bodily  Weaknefs  ; 
yet  fccma  to  have  been  fpent  in  continual  and  exceedingPainful- 
nefs  in  Religion  ;  but  in  great  Bitternefs  of  Spirit  by  Reafon  of 
his  Vilenefs  and  Corruption  ;  he  fays  thus,  1  thought  there  was  not 
cne  Creature  living  fo  vhe  as  /.  Oh,  my  inivard  Pollution  !  Oh^ 
my  Guilt  and  Shame  before  God  !---  I  know  not  what  to  do.  Oh, 
1  long'd  ardently  to  be  dean  fed  end  ivajhed  from  ihe  Stains  of  in- 
ivard  Pollution  !  Oh,  to  be  made  like  God, or  rather  to  be  made 
iit  for  God  to  own.] 

Friday,  July  6.  Awoke  this  Morning  in  the  Fear  of  God  : 
Soon  called  to  Mind  my  Sadnefs  in  the  Evening  paft  ;  and  fpent 
my  >fiifl  waking  Minutes  in  Prayer  for  Sandification,  that  my 
Soul  might  be  wafh'd  from  its  exceeding  Pollution  and  Defile- 
ment.   After  1  arofe,  !  fpcnl  feme  Time  in  readingGod's  Word 

and 


t)f  Mr.  David  Brainerd:      A.D.  1 744;     119 

and  Prayer  :  I  cried  to  God  under  a  Senfe  of  my  great  Indigen- 
cy.—  I  am,  of  late,  moft  of  all  concerned  for  Minifterial  Quali- 
iications,  and  the  Converfion  of  the  Heathen :  Laft  Year,  I 
longed  to  be  prepared  for  a  World  oi  Glory ^  and  fpeedily  to  de- 
part outof  this  World  ^  but  of  late  all  my  Concern  almoft  is 
for  the  Converfion  of  the  Heathen  5  and  for  thatEnd,  I  long  to 
live.  But  blefTed  be  God,  I  have  lefs  defire  to  live  for  any  of 
the  Pleafures  of  the  World,  than  ever  I  had  :  I  long  and  love  to 
be  a  Pilgrim ;  and  want  Grace  to  imitate  the  Life,  Labours 
and  SuiFerings  of  St.  Paul  among  the  Heathen.  And  when  I 
long  for  Holinefs  now,it  is  not  fomuch  for  my  felf  as  formerly  ; 
but  rather  that  thereby  I  may  become  an  able  Minijier  of  tht 
New-Te/iament,  efpecially  to  the  Heathen.  Spent  about  two 
Hours  this  Morning  inReading  and  Prayer  by  Turns  5  and  was 
in  a  watchful  tender  Frame,  afraid  of  every  Thing  that  might 
cool  my  Affe6lions,  and  draw  away  my  Heart  from  God.  Was 
fomething  flrengthen'd  in  my  Studies  j  but  near  Night  was 
very  weak  and  weary. 

Saturday,  July  7.  Was  very  much  difordered  tbisMorning, 
and  my  Vigour  all  fpent  and  exhaufted  :  But  was  aiFedeJ  and 
refrefh'd  in  reading  the  fweet  Story  of  Elijah's  Tranllation,and 
enjoyed  feme  AfFeiSlion  and  Fervency  in  Prayer ;  longed  much 
for  Minifterial  Gifts  and  Graces,  that  I  might  do  fomeihing  in 
the  Caufe  of  God.  Afterwards  was  rcfrefh'd  and  invigorated, 
while  readingMr.  Jofeph AlUine^ s  firftCafeofConfciencej^t.and 
enabled  then  to  pray  with  fome  Ardour  of  Soul,  and  was  afraid 
of  Carelefnefs  and  Self-Confidence,  and  longed  for  Holinefs. 

LordVDay,  July  8.  Was  ill  laft  Night,  not  able  to  reft 
quietly.  Had  fome  fmall  Degree  of  Afliftance  in  preaching  to 
the  Indians  ;  and  afterwards  was  enabled  to  preach  to  the  White 
People  with  fome  Power,  efpecially  in  the  Clofe  of  my  Difcourfe 
from  Jer,  iii.  23.  The  Lord  alfo  affifted  me  in  feme  MeafuVe 
in  the  firft  Prayer  :  Blefled  be  his  Name.  Near  Night,  tho* 
very  weary,  was  enabled  to  read  God's  Word  with  fome  fweet 
Reliih  of  it,  and  to  pray  with  AfFe<Stion,  Fervency,  and  ( f  truft) 
Faith:  My  Soul  was  more  fenfibly  dependent  on  God,  than 
ufual.  Was  watchful,  tender,  and  jealous  of  my  own  Heart, 
left  I  (hould  admit  Carelefnefs  and  vain  Thoughts,  and  grieve 
the  blefTed  Spirit,  fo  that  he  fiiould  withdraw  his  fweet,  kind, 
and  tender  Influences.  Long'd  to  depart  and  he  withChri/i ^moic 
than  at  any  Time  of  late.  My  Soul  was  exceedingly  united  to 
the  Scents  of  antient  Times,  as  well  as  thofe  now  living  ;  efpe- 
ciallv  my  Soul  melted  for  the  Society  of  Elijah  and  Elift:>a, 

R  V/as 


120     Mt.  27.  fJtf   LIFE 

Was  enabled  to  cry  to  God  with  a  Child-like  Spirit,  and  iQ 
continue  inftant  in  Prayer  for  fome  Time.  Was  much  enlarged 
in  the  Aveet  Duty  of  Interceflion  :  Was  enabled  to  remember 
great  Numbers  of  dear  Friends,  and  precious  Souls,  as  well  as 
Chrift's  Minifters.  Continued  in  this  Frame,  afraid  of  every 
idle  Thought,  'till  I  drop'd  afleep. 

Monday,  July  g.  Was  tinder  much  Illnefs  of  Body  moft  of 
the  Day,  and  not  able  to  fit  up  the  whole  Day.  TowardsNight, 
felt  a  little  better.  Then  fpent  fome  Time  in  reading  God's 
Word  and  Prayer  ;  Enjoy'd  fome  Degree  of  Fervency  and  Af- 
fe£lion  :  VVas  enabled  to  plead  with  God  for  his  Caufe  and 
Kingdom  :  And,  thro'  divine  Goodnefs,  It  was  apparent  to  me 
that  it  was  his  Caufe  I  pleaded  for,  and  not  my  own  :  And  wa3 
enabled  to  make  this  an  Argument  with  God  to  anfwer  my 
Requefis. 

Tuefday,  jful^  10.     Was  very  ill  and  full  of  Pain,  and  very 
dull  and  fpiritlefs.— -  In  the  Evening,   had  an  afFecSling  Senfe  of 
my  Ignorance,  i^c»  and  of  my  need  of  God  at  all  Times,  to  do 
every  Thing  for  me  ;  and  mv  Soul  was  humbled  before  God. 

Wednefday,  Ja/y  ir.  Was  ftill  exercifcd  with  Illnefs  and 
Pain.  Had  fome  Degree  of  Aifedion  and  Warmth  in  Pray- 
er and  reading  God's  Word  :  Long'd  for  Abraham'%  Faith  and 
Fellowfhip  with  God ;  and  felt  fome  Refolution  to  fpend  all  my 
Time  for  God,  and  to  exert  ray  felf  with  more  Fervency  in 
bis  Service  j  but  found  my  Body  weak  and  feeble.  In  the 
Afternoon,  tho*  very  ill, was  enabled  to  fpend  fome  confidcrable 
Time  inPrayer  ;  fpent  indeed  moft  of  theDay  in  that  Exercife  ; 
and  my  Soul  was  diffident,  watchful  and  tender,  left  1  fhould 
cfFend  my  bleiled  Friend,  in  Thought  or  Behaviour.  1  am 
perfwaded  my  Soul  confided  in, and  lean'd  upon  the  blefTedGod. 
Oh,  what  need  did  I  fee  my  felf  to  ftand  in  of  God  at  all  Times, 
to  aflift  me  and  lead  me  [---Found  a  great  want  of  Strength  and 
Vigour,  both  in  the  outward  and  inner  Man. 

[  TheExercifes  andExperiences,that  he  fpeaks  of  in  the  next 
nineDay3,arc  verySimilar  to  thofeof  the  prcceedingDays,of  this 
and  the  forefroing  Week  ;  aSenfeof  his  own  Weaknefs,  Igno- 
.rance»  Unprofifablentfs,  and  V^iienefs  ;  loathing  and  abhorring 
Iijmfelf  ;  Self-diffidence  ;  Scnfe  of  the  Grcatnefs  of  his  Work, 
and  his  great  need  of  divine  Help,  and  the  extream  Danger  of 
Self-ConfiJence  ;  longing  for  Holinefs  and  Humility,  and  to 
be  fifted  for  his  Work  ;  and  to  live  toGod  ;  and  longing  for  the 
Conveifion  of  the  Indians ;  aad  thefe  Things  to  a  very  great 
Degree.  J 

#     Saturday, 


of  Mr.  David  Bralnerd.     A.D.  1 744;      1 2  r 

Saturday,  y«i;;  21.     This  Morning,  was  greatly  opprefled 
with  Guilt  and  Shame,  from  a  Senfe  of  inward   Vilenefs  and 
Pollution.     About  nine,  withdrew  to  the  Woods  for  Prayer  ; 
but  had  not  much  Comfort  ;  I  appeared  to  my  felf  the  vileft 
meaneft  Creature  upon  Earth,  and  could  fcarcely  live  with  my 
felf;  fo  mean  and  vile  I  appeared,  that  1  thought  I  (hould  never 
be  able  to  hold  up  my  Face  in  Heaven,  if  God  of  his  infinite 
Grace  fhould  bring  me  thither.     Towards  Night  my  Burden 
refpe6ling  my  Work  among  xhtlndiam  began  to  increafe  much  5 
and  was  aggravated ^by  hearing  fundry  Things  that  look'd  very 
difcouraging,  in  particular  that  they  intended  to  meet  together 
the  next  Day  for  an  idolatrous  Feaji  and  Dance.     Then  I  began 
to  be  in  Anguifh  :  I  thought  I  muft  in  Confcience  go  and  en- 
deavour to  break  them  up  ;  and  knew  not  how  to  attempt  fuch 
a  Thing.      However  I  withdrew  for  Prayer,hoping  forStrength 
from  above.     And  in  Prayer  I  was  exceedingly    enlarged,  and 
my  Soul  was  as  much  drawn  out  as  ever  I  remember  it  to  have 
been  in  my  Life,  or  near.     I  was  in  fuch  Anguifli,  and  pleaded 
with  fo  much  Earncftnefs  and    Importunity,    that  when  1  rofe 
from  my  Knees  I  felt  extreamly  weak  and  overcome,  I  could 
fcarcely  walk  ftrait,  mv  Joints  were  loofed,  the  fweat  ran  down 
my  Face  andBody,  &Nature  feem'd  as  if  it  would  difTolve.     So 
far  as  I  could  judge,  I  was  wholly   free  Uova  felfiJI)  Ends  in  fpy 
ferventSupplications  for  the  poor  Indians,     1  knew,  they  were 
met  together  to  worfhip  Devils^  and  not  God  ;  and  this  made 
me  cry  earneflly,  that  God  would  now  appear,  and  help  me  in 
my  Attempts  to  break  up  this  idolatrous  Meeting.     My  Soul 
pleaded  long  ;  and  I  thought,  God  would  hear,  and  would  go 
with  me  to  vindicate  his   own  Caufe  :  I   feem'd  to  conftde  in 
God  for  his  Prefencc  and  AfHftance.     And  thus  I   fpent  the 
Evening,  praying    incefiantly  for  divine  Afliftance,  and  that  I 
might  not  be  Self-dependent,  but   liill  have  my  whole  Depen- 
dance  upon  God.     What  I  pafs'd  thro'  was  remarkable,  and 
indeed  inexpreflible.     All   Things   here  below  vanifh'd  ;  and 
there  appeared  to  be  nothing  of  any  confiderable  Importance  to 
me,  but  Holinefs  of  Heart  and  Life,  and  the  Converfion  of  the 
Heathen  to  God.     All  my  Cares,  Fears    and  Defires,  which 
might  be  faid  to  be  of  a   worldly  Nature,  difappeared  ;  and 
were,  in  my  Efteem,  of  little  more  Importance  than  a  PufFof 
Wind.     I  exceedingly  long' d,  that  God  would  ^^^  iohvmfelfa 
Name  among  the  Heathen :  And  I  appeal'd   to  him  with  the 
greateft  Freedom,   that  he  knew  I   perfer'd  him  akovtmy  chief 
Joy*    Indeed,  I  had  noNotion  of  Joy  from  this  World ;   1  cared 

R  2  not 


122     Mt.  27.  The  l.\¥E 

not  where  or  how  Hived,  or  what  Hardfhips  I  weht  thro'  ;  fo 
that  1  could  but  gain  Souls ia  Christ.  I  contiwued  in  this 
Frame  all  the  Evening  and  Night.  While  I  was  aflcep,  I 
dream'd  of  thefe Things  ;  and  when  \  waked  (as  I  frequently 
did)  the  firft  Thing  I  thought  of  was  this  great  Work  of  plead- 
ing for  God  againlt  Satan, 

LordVDay,  yw/>22.  When  I  waked,  my  Soul  was  bur- 
dened with  what  feemcd  to  be  before  me  :  I  cried  to  God,  be* 
fore  I  could  get  out  of  my  Bed  :  And  as  foon  as  I  was  drefs'd, 
I  withdrew  into  the  Woods,  to  pour  out  my  burdened  Soul  to 
God,  efpecially  forAfliftance  in  my  great  Work  ;  for  I  could 
fcarcely  think  of  any  Thing  elfe  :  And  cnjoyod  the  fame  Free^ 
dom  and  Fervency  as  the  laft  Evening ;  and  did  with  unfpeaka-^ 
ble  Freedom  give  up  my  felf  afrefh  to  God,  for  Life  or  Death, 
for  all  Hardfhips  he  fliould  call  me  to  among  the  Heathen  ;  and 
felt  as  if  nothing  could  difcourage  me  from  this  blefled  Work. 
I  had  a  ftrong  Hope,  that  God  would  boiu  the  Heavens  and  coma 
down^  and  do  fome  marvellous  Work  among  the  Heathen.  And 
when  I  was  riding  to  the  Indians^  three  Miles,  my  Heart  wag 
continually  going  up  to  God  for  his  Prefence  and  Afllftance  | 
and  hoping, awd  almofl  expecting,  thatGod  would  make  this  th& 
jy ay  of  his  Power  and  Grace  amongft  the  poor  Indians,  When 
I  came  to  them,  I  found  them  engaged  in  their  FrolUk-y  but 
thro'divineGoodnefs  1  got  them  to  break  up,  and  attend  to  my 
Preaching  :  Yet  ftill  there  appeared  nothing  of  the  fpccial  Pow- 
er of  God  among  them,  Preach'd  again  to  them  in  the  Af- 
ternoon ;  and  obfervedjthe/wflVtfSi  were  mox t  fot>er  than  before  : 
But  ftill  faw  nothing  fpeclal  among  them  ;  from  whence 
SaianioQik  occafion  to  tempt  and  buffet  me  with  thefe  curfed 
Suggefiions^Ty^^re-  is  noGod^CM  if  there  be, he  is  not  able  toconvert 
the  Indians,  before  they  had  more  Knowledge,  t!fc.  I  Wwis  very 
weak  and  weary,  and  my  Soul  born  down  with  Perplexity  :  But 
was  mortified  to  all  the  World,  and  was  determined  ftill  to  wait 
tjpQn  God  for  the  Converfion  of  the  Heathen,  tho*  the  Devil 
tempted  me  to  the  contrary. 

Monday,  J^uly  23.  Retain'd  flill  a  deep  and  preiUng  Senfe 
of  what  lay  with  fo  much  Weight  upon  me  Yefterday  :  But 
was  more  calm  and  quiet;  enjoyed  Freedom  and  Compofure, 
after  the  Temptations  of  the  laft  Evening  :  Had  fweet  Refigna- 
tion  to  the  divine  Will  ;  and  defired  nothing  fo  much  as  th$ 
Converfion  of  the  Heathen  to  God,  and  that  hisKingdom  might 
come  in  my  own  Heart,  a^id  the  Hearts  of  others.  Rode  to  9 
§ettlcmtnt  of  .ifrifi  People,  about  15  Mika  South- Wsftwar^J  -^ 


^/ Mr,  David  Brainerd     A.D.  1744.      123 

foent  my  Time  in  Prayer  and  Meditation  by  the  Way.  Near 
Night,  preachM  from  Math,  v.  3.--  God  was  pleas  d  to  afford 
me  feme  Degree  of  Freedom  and  Fervency.  BlefTed  be  Godi 
for  any  Meafure  of  AfTiftance. 

Tuefday,  lul^  24-  ^ode  about  17  Miles  Weft  ward,  over 
a  hideous  Mountain,  to  a  Number  of  Jndiam,  Got  together 
near  20  of  'em  :  Preach'd  to  'em  in  the  Evening,  and  lodg  d 
am-ncr  them  f.—  Was  weak,  and  felt  Ibmething  dsfconrolate : 
Yet  a)uld  have  no  Freedom  in  the  Thought  of  any  other  Cir- 
cumftanccs  or  Bufmefs  in  Life  :  All  my  Defire  was  the  Convi^r- 
fion  of  the  Heathen,  and  all  my  Hope  was  in  God  :  God  does 
notfufferme  topleafe  or  comfort  my  felf  with  Hopes  of  feemg 
Friends,  returning  to  my  dear  Acquaintance,  and  enjoying 
worldly  Comforts.  . 

[  The  next  Day,  he  preach'd  to  thefe  Indiam  agam  ;  and 
then  returned  to  the  Irijh  Settlement,   and  there  preach'd  to  a 
numerous  Congregation  :  There  was   a  confiderable  Appear- 
ance of  Awakening  in  theCongregation.   Thurfday ,  he  returned 
jhome,  exceedingly  fatigued  and  fpent ;  ftill  in  the  fame  Frame 
of  Mortification  to  the  World, and  folicitous  for  the  Advancement 
of  Chrift's  Kingdom:  And  on  this  Day  he  fays  thus,   '«  I  have 
"  felt,  this  Week,  more  of  the  Spirit  of  a  P^r/w  on  Earthy 
*'  than  perhaps  ever  before  \  And  yet  fo  defirous  to  fee  Z/«7«'s 
««  Profperity,   thatlwasnot  fo  willing  to  leave  this  Scene  of 
^'  Sorrow  as  I  ufed  to  be."— The  two  remaining  Days  of  the 
Week,  he  was  very  ill,  and  cries  out  of  Wandrings,  ^Dulnefi., 
and  want  of  fpiiitual  Fervency  and  Sweetnefs.  On  the  Sabbath, 
He  was  confined  by Hhiefs,  not  able  to  go  out  to  preach.  After 
this,  his  lllnefs  increafed  upon  him,  and  he  continued  very  ill 
all  the  Week  ;   *  and  fays,  that  "  he  thought  be  never  before 
♦  '  endured  fuch  a  Seafon  of  diftreffingWeaknefs ;  and  that  his 
««  Nature  was  fo  fpent,  that  he  could  neither  ftand,  fic,  nor  lie 
*«  with  any  Quiet  ;  and  that  he  was  exercifed   with  extream 
««  Faintnefsand   Sicknefs  at  his  Stomach;  and  that  his  Mind 
^«   was  as  much  diforder'd  as  his  Body,  feeming  to  be  ftupid, 
<'  and  without  all  kind  of  Affedions  towards  allObje<5b ;  and 
««  yet  perplex'd,  to  think,  that  he  lived  for  nothing,  that  preci- 


t  See  Mr.  Brainerd' s  Narrative  at  the  End  of  his  Ordinaiios 

Sermon^  Page  34. 
^  This  Week,  on  Tuefday,  he  wrote  {he  4tb  LttUr  added 

at  ^he  End  of  thisAcccunt* 


124    Mt.zf.  21&<?LIFE 

<«  ousTime  roird  away,  and  he  could  do  nothing  but  trifle: 
«^  And  fpeaks  of  it  as  a  Seafon  wherein  Satan  buffeted  him  with 
«*  fome  peculiar  Temptations."—  Concerning  the  next  five 
Days  he  writes'thus,  "  OnLord*s-Day -*^«^.  5.  Was  ftill  very 
*«  poor.  But,  tho'  very  weak,  I  vifited  and  preach'd  to  the 
«<  poor  Indians  twice,  and  was  flrengthen'd  vaftly  beyond  my 
««  Expectations.  And  indeed,  the  Lord  gave  me  fome  Free- 
«'  dom  and  Fervency  in  addrefling  them  ;  tho'  I  had  not 
•'  Strength  enough  to  ftand,  but  was  obliged  to  fit  down  the 
<^  wholeTime  ;  TowardsNight,was  extreamly  weak,faint,fick 
««  and  full  ofPain.  And  thus  I  have  continued  much  in  the  fame 
««  Statethat  I  was  in  lafl Week, through  the  mod  of  this(it  being 
««  now  Friday  ;  )  unable  to  engage  in  anyBufinefs  ;  frequently 
*«  unable  to  pray  in  the  Family.  I  am  obliged  to  let  all  my 
«*  Thoughts  and  Concerns  run  atRandom  ;  for  I  have  neither 
**  Strengch  to  read,medrtate,  or  pray  :  And  this  naturally  per- 
*'  plexes  my  Mind.  I  feem  to  my  felf  like  a  Man  that  has  all 
*«  his  Eftate  embarqued  in  one  fmall  Boat,  unhappily  going 
«'  adrift,  down  a  fwift  Torrent.  The  poor  Owner  ftands  on 
*«  the  Shore,  and  looks,  and  laments  his  Lofs.— But  alas,  tho' 
<«  my  all  feems  to  be  adrift,  and  I  ftand  and  fee  it,  I  dare  not 
«'  lament ;  for  this  finks  my  Spirits  more,  and  aggravates  my 
<:«  bodiK'  Diforders  I  lam  forced  therefore  to  divert  my  felf 
<«  withTrifles  ;  altho'  at  the  fameTimel  am  afraid,  and  after 
<«  feel  as  if  I  was  guilty  of  the  Mifimprovement  of  Time.  And 
««  oftentimes  my  Confcience  is  fo  exercifed  ^with  this  miferable 
<«  Way  of  fpending  Time,  that  I  have  no  Peace  ;  tho'  I  have 
*:'  no  Strength  of  Mind  orBody  to  improve  it  to  betterPurpofe. 
'«  O  that  God  would  pity  my  diftreffed  State. 

The  next  three  Weeks  after  this,  his  Illnefs  was  not  fo  ex- 
treme: He  was  in  fome  Degree  capable  of  Bufinefs,  both  pub- 
lick  and  private  ;  (  altho  he  had  fome  Turns  wherein  his  Indif- 
pofition  prevailed  to  a  great  Degree  : )  He  alfo  in  this  Space 
had,  for  the  moft  Part,  much  more  inward  Affiftance,  and 
Strength  of  Mind  :  He  often  exprefTes  great  Longings  for  the 
Enlargement  of  Chrifl's  Kingdom  ;  efpecially  by  the  Conver- 
fion  of  the  Heathen  to  God  :  He  fpeaks  of  his  Hope  of  this  as 
sU  his  Delight  and  Joy.  He  continues  ftill  to  exprefs  his  ufual 
Longings  after  Holinefs  and  living  to  God,  and  his  Senfe  of  his 
own  Unworthinefs :  He  feveral  Times  fpeaks  of  his  appearing 
to  himfelf  the  vilefl  Creature  on  Earth  ;  and  once  fays,  that  he 
verily  tho't  there  were  none  of  God's  Children  who  fell  fo  far 
(hort  of  that  Holinefs,  and  Perfe6tion  in  their  Qbediehcc, which 

God 


cf  Mr*  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1744^     125 

God  requires,  as  he.  He  fpeaks  of  his  feeling  more  dead  than 
ever  to  the  Enjoyments  of  the  World.  He  fometimes  mentions 
fpecial  Afliftancc  that  he  had  in  this  Space  ofTime,  in  preaching 
to  the  Indians,  and  of  Appearances  of  religiousConcern  among 
them.  He  fpeaks  alfo  of Affiftance  in  Prayer  for  abfentFriends, 
and  cfpecially  Minifters  and  Candidates  for  the  Miniftry  ;  and 
of  much  Comfort  he  enjoy'd  in  the  Company  of  fomeMinifters 
that  came  to  vifit  him.  ]  .      ,.      ^  c    r       ir 

Saturday,  Sepu  i.  Wasfo  far  ftrengthen'd,  after  a  Seafon  of 
great  Wcaknefs,  that  I  was  able  to  fpend  two  or  three  Hours  in 
writing  on  a  divine  Subjea.  Enjoy'd  fomeComfort  andSweet- 
ncfs  in  Things  divine  and  facred  :  And  as  my  bodily  Strength 
was  in  fome  Meafure  reftored,  fo  my  Soul  feemM  to  be  fome- 
what  vigorous,  and  engaged  in  the  Things  of  God. 

Lords-Day,  Sept,  2.  Was  enabled  to  fpeak  to  my  poor 7;7<i/<7« 
with  much  Concern  and  Fervency  ;  and  I  am  perfwaded,  God 
enabled  me  to  exercifeFaith  in  him,whilelwasfpeaking  tothem. 
I  perceived,  that  fome  of  them  were  afraid  to  hearken  to,  and 
embrace  Chrijiianiiy,  left  they  fliould  be  inchanted  and  poifon'd 
by  fome  of  the  Powcws  :  But  I  was  enabled  to  plead  with  them 
not  to  fear  thefe  ;  and  confiding  in  God  for  Safety  andDeliver- 
ance,  I  bid  a  Challenge  to  all  thefe  Powers  of  Darknefs,  to  do 
their  worft  upon  me  firft  :  I  told  my  People,  I  was  a  Chnjiian, 
and  afk'd  them  why  the  Powows  did  not  Bewitch  and  Poifon 
me.  I  fcarcely  ever  felt  more  fenfible  of  my  ownllnworthinefs, 
than  in  this  Aaion  ;  I  faw,  that  the  Honour  of  God  was  con- 
cerned in  the  Affair  ;  and  I  defired  to  be  preferved,  not  from 
felfilh  Views,  but  for  a  Teftimony  of  the  divine  Pov/er  and 
Goodnefs,  and  of  thcTruth  ofChriftianity,  and  that  God^  might 
be  glorified.  Afterwards,  I  found  my  Soul  rejoice  in  God  for 
his  afTifting  Grace. 

[  After  this,  he  went  a  Journey  into  Neiv-Evgland,  and  was 

abfent  from  the  Place  of  his  Abode,  at  the  Forks  of  Delaware^ 

about  three   Weeks.     He  was  in  a  feeble  State  the  greater  Part 

of  the  Time.     But  in  the  latter  Part  of  the  Journey,  be  found 

he  gained  much  in  Health    and  Strength.      And  as  to  the  State 

of  his  Mind,and  his  religious  and  fpiritualExercifeSjit  was  much 

with  him  as  had  been  before  ufual  in  Journeys  ;  excepting  that 

theFrame  of  hisMind  fcemed  more  generally  to  be  comfortable. 

But  yet  there  are  Complaints  of  fome  uncomfortable  Seafons, 

want  of  Fervency,  and  want  of  Retirements,  and  Time  alone 

with  God.     In   this  Journey,  he  did  not  forget  the  Indians', 

bit  once  aad  again  fpeaks  of  his  longing  for  their  Converfion.  ] 

VYeclnefda/, 


126  Ml  27  ir^^  LIFE 

Wednefday,  ^ept.  26.  Rode  HomCjto  tbeForks  ofDelaivanl 
What  Reafon  have  1  to  blefsGod,  who  has  preferved  me  in  rid- 
ing more  than  420  Miles,  and  has  kept  all  my  Bonesy  that  not  cm 
of  them  has  been  broken  I  My  Health  like  wife  is  greatly  recover'd. 

0  that  I  could  dedicate  my  all  to  God  :  This  is  all  the  Return 

1  can  make  to  him. 

Thurfday,  Sept.  27.  Was  fomething  melancholy  :  Had  not 
much  Freedom  and  Comfort  in  Prayer  :  My  Soul  is  difconlb- 
late,  when  God  is  withdrawn. 

Friday,  Sept.  28.  Spent  the  Day  in  Prayer,  Reading,  and 
Writing.  Felt  fomcfm  all  Degree  of  warmth  inPrayer,and  fomc 
Defires  of  the  Enlargement  of  Chrift*s  Kingdom  by  the  Con- 
verfion  of  the  Heathen,  and  that  God  would  make  me  a  chofen 
Vejfel^  to  bear  his  Name  before  them :  Longed  for  Grace  to  ena- 
ble me  to  be  faithful. 

[  The  next  Day,  he  fpeaks  of  the  fame  Longings  for  the  Ad- 
vancement of  Chrilt's  Kingdom,  and  the  Converfion  of  the  Inr 
dims  ;  but  complains  greatly  of  the  ill  E6Fe6tsof  theDiverfions 
of  his  late  Journey,  as  unfixing  his  Mind  ire  m  that  Degree  of 
Engagednefs,  Fervency,  Watchfulnefs,  k^c,  which  he  enjoyed 
before.     And  the  like  Complaints  are  continued  the  nextDay.] 

Monday,  O^ob.  i.  Was  engaged  this  Day  in  makingPrepa- 
raticn  for  my  intended  Journey  ioSufquahannah  :  Withdrew  fe- 
veral  Times  to  the  Woods  for  fecret  Duties,  and  endeavoured 
to  plead  for  thcdivinePrefenceto  go  with  me  to  the  poorPagans, 
to  whom  I  was  going  to  preach  the  Gofpel.  Towards  Night, 
rode  about  four  MiJcs,  and  met  Brother  Byram  ;  *  who  was 
come,at  myDefire,  tobe  myCompanion  inTravel  ioihelndians^ 
I  rejoiced  to  fee  him  ;  and,  I  trufl,God  made  his  Converfation 
profitable  to  me  ;  I  fa w  him,  as  I  thought,  more  dead  to  the 
World,  it's  anxious  Cares,  and  alluring  Objects,  than  I  was  : 
and  this  made  me  look  within  my  felf,  and  gave  me  a  greater 
Senfeof  m}'Gui!t,  Ingratitude,  and  Mifery. 

Tuefday,  O^oh.  2.  Set  out  on  my  Journey,  in  Company 
with  dear  Brother  Byram,  and  my  Interpreter,  and  two  chief 
Mndians  from  (he  Forks  of  Delaware,  Travelled  about  25  Miles 
and  lodged  in  one  of  the  laft  Houfes  on  our  Road  ;  after  which 
ih^iQ  was  nothing  but  a  hideous  and  howling  IVildernefs. 


*  Minifter  at  a  Place  called  RockdticuSy  about  40  Miles  from 
Mr.  Braimrd'i  Lodginos. 

Wednelday, 


(?/ Mr.  David  Braiaerd.        ^.0.1744?    127 

Wednefday,  OBoh.  3.  We  went  on  our  Way  into  the 
Wildernefs,  and  found  the  moft  difficult  and  dangerous  travel- 
ling, by  far,  that  ever  any  of  us  had  feen  ;  we  had  fcarce  any 
Thing  elfebut  loftyMountains,  deepValleys,ahd  hideousRocks, 
to  make  our  Way  thro*.  However,  I  felt  fome  Sweetnefs  in 
divineThings,  part  of  the  Day,  and  had  my  Mind  intenfely  en- 
gaged in  Meditation  on  a  divine  Subjedl.  Near  Night,  my 
Beaft  that  I  rode  upon,  hung  one  of  her  Legs  in  the  Rocks,  and 
fell  down  under  me  5  But  thro'  divineGoodnels,  I  was  not  hurt. 
However,  fhe  broke  herLeg  ;  and  being  in  fuch  ahideousPlace» 
and  near  30  Miles  from  any  Houfe,  I  faw  nothing  that  could  be 
done  topreferve  her  Life,  and  fo  was  obliged  to  kill  her,  and  to 
profecute  my  Journey  on  Foot.  This  Accident  made  me  ad- 
mire thedivineGoodnefs  to  me,  that  myBones  were  not  broken, 
and  the  Multitade  of  'em  fill'd  with  ftrong  Pain,  Juft  at  Dark^ 
we  kindled  a  Fire, cut  up  a  few  Bufties,  and  made  a  Shelter  over 
our  Heads,  to  fave  us  from  the  Froft,  which  was  very  hard  that 
Night ;  and  committing  our  felves  to  God  by  Prayer,  we  lay 
down  on  the  Ground,  and  ilept  quietly. 

[  The  next  Day,  they  went  forward  on  their  Journey,  and  afi 
Night  took  up  their  Lodging  in  the  Woods  in  like  Manner.] 

Friday,  Oaoh.  5.  We  arrived  at  Sufquahannah  River,  at  a 
Place  called  Opeholhaupung  \  i  Found  there  12  Indian  Houfes  : 
After  I  had  faluted  the  King  in  a  friendly  Manner,  I  told  him 
my  Bufinefs,  and  that  my  Defirc  was  to  teach  themChrifiianiiy. 
After  fome  Confultation,  the  Indians  gathered,  and  I  preach'd 
to  'em.  And  when  I  had  done,  I  afked,  if  they  would  hear  me 
again.  They  reply'd,  that  they  would  confider  of  it  5  and  foon 
after  fent  me  Word,  that  they  would  immediately  attend,  if  I 
would  preach  :  Which  I  did,  witbFreedom,bothTimes,  When 
I  afked  'em  again,  whether  they  would  hear  me  further,  they 
reply'd,  they  would  the  next  Day.  I  was  exceeding  fenfible  of 
the  ImpofTibility  of  doing  any  Thing  for  the  poor  Heathen  with- 
out fpecial  Affiftancc  from  above  :  And  my  Soul  feem'd  to  reft 
on  God,  and  leave  it  to  him  to  do  as  he  pleafed  in  that  which  I 
faw  was  his  own  Caufe  :  And  indeed,  thro'  divine  Goodnefs,  1 
had  felt  fomething  of  this  Frame  moft  of  the  Time  while  I  was 
travelling  thither  i  and  in  fome  Meafure  before  I  fet  out. 


t  See h\sNarrauv$  at  theEnd  oihhOrd.  S^rmsnF^g*  35*  S^- 
S  Saturday, 


[122      Mt.if,  ire^LIFE 

Saturday,  O^ioh.  6.  Rofe  early,  and  befought  the  Lord  for 
Help  in  my  great  V/ork.  Near  Noon,  preach'd  again  to  the 
Indians  :  And  in  the  Afternoon,  vifited  them  from  Houfe  to 
Houfe,  and  invited  them  to  come  and  hear  me  again  the  next 
Day,  and  put  off  their  hunting  Defign, which  they  were  juft  en- 
tring  upon,  'till  Monday.  This  Night,  I  truft,  the  Lord  flood  by 
me  to  encourage  and  firengthen  my  Soul  :  I  fpent  more  than  an 
Hour  in  fecret  Retirement  ;  was  enabled  to  pour  cut  my  Mean 
he/ore  God,  for  the  Increafe  of  Grace  in  my  Soul,  for  Miqifle- 
rial  Endowments,  for  Succefs  among  the  poor  Indians ^{oi:  God's 
Minifters  and  People,  and  for  dear  Friends  vaftly  diflant,  ^f. 
Blefled  me  God. 

[  The  next  Day,he  complains  of  great  want  of  Fixednefs  and 
Intenfenefs  in  Religion,  fo  that  he  could  not  keep  any  fpiriiual 
Thought  one  Minute  without  Diflradion  ;  which  occafion'd 
Anguifh  of  Spirit.  He  felt  (he  fays)  amazingly  Guilty ^  and  ea- 
Iremely  MiferahU  ;  and  cries  out,  *'  Oh  my  Soul,  what  Death 
**  it  is,  to  have  the  AfFedtions  unable  to  center  iu  God,  byRea- 
*'  fon  of  Darknefs,and  confequently  roving  after  thatSatisfadion 
'«  elfewhere,  that  is  only  to  be  found  here  i"  However,  he 
preach'd  twice  to  the  Indians  with  fome  Freedom  and  Power  ; 
But  was  afterwards  damp'd  hy  the  QhjeSiiom  they  made  againft 
Chrijiianity.  In  the  Evening,  in  a  Senfe  of  his  great  Defeds  in 
Preaching,  he  inireaied  God  not  to  impute  to  him  Blood-Guiltinefs  j 
but  yet  was  at  the  fame  Time  enabled  to  rejoyce  in  God."] 

Monday,  O£iob.  8.  Vifited  the  Indiam  with  a  Dcfign  to  take 
my  Leave  of  them,fuppc  ling  they  would  this  Morning  go  out  to 
Hunting  early  ;  but  beyond  my  Expedlation  and  Hope,  they 
defired  to  hear  nie  preach  again.  I  gladly  complied  with  their 
Rcquefl-,  and  aftervi'ards  endeavoured  to  anfwer  their  Obje^ions 
againft  Chriftianity.  Then  they  went  away  ;  and  we  fpentthe 
reft  of  the  Afternoon  in  Reading  and  Prayer,  intending  to  go 
Home- ward  vtry  early  the  next  Day.  My  Soul  was  in  fome 
Meafure  refrefii'd  in  /ccret  Prayer  and  Meditation.  BlefTed  be 
the  Lord  for  all  his  Goodnefs. 

Tuefday,  O^i?.*.  9.  We  rofe  about  4  in  the  MornJng,  and 
commending  our  felves  to  God  by  Prayer,  and  afking  his  fpccial 
Proted^ion,  we  fet  out  on  our  Journey  homewards  about  5.  and 
travelled  with  great  fteadinefs 'till  pad  6  at  Night.  And  then 
made  us  2Firc,and  aSheher  of  Barks,  and  fo  refted.  I  had  fome 
clear  and  comfortable  Thoughts  on  a  divine  Subje^Sl,by  the  Way, 
towards  Night.-—  In  the  Night,  the  Wolves  howi'd  around  us ; 
but  God  prefcrved  us. 

[The 


of  Mr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1 744.     1 29 

[  The  next  Day,  they  rofe  early,  and  fet  forward,  and  tra- 
velled that  Day,  'till  they  came  to  an  hiP)  Settlement,  where 
Mr.  Brsimrd  was  acquainted,  and  lodged  there.  He  fpeaks  of 
fomeSweetnefs  in  divineThings,  andThankfulnefs  toGod  for  his 
Goodnefs  to  him  in  this  Journey,  that  he  felt  in  his  Heart  in  the 
Evening,  tho*  attended  with  Shame  for  his  Barrennefs.  On 
Thurfday,  he  continued  in  the  fame  Place  5  and  he  and  Mr. 
Byram  preached  there  to  the  People.] 

Friday,  O^ob.  12.  Rode  Home  to  my  Lodging  ;  where  F 
poured  out  my  Soul  to  God  in  fecret  Prayer,  and  endeavoured 
to  blefs  him  for  his  abundantGoodnefs  tome  in  my  late  Journey. 
I  fcarce  ever  enjoyed  moreHealth  ;  at  leaft,  of  later  Years  ;  And 
God  marvelloufly,  and  almoft  miraculoufly,  fupported  me  under 
theFatiguesof^theWay,  and  Travelling onFoot.  BlefTed  be  the 
Lord,  that  continually  preferves  me  in  all  my  Ways. 

[  0;i  Saturday,  he  went  again  to  the  IriJJj  Settlement,  to 
fpend  the  Sabbath  there,  his  Indians  being  gone.] 

Lord's-Day,  0^7^^.  14.     Was  much  confufed  and  perplexed 
in  my  Thoughts  ;  could  not  pray  ;  and  was  almoft  difcouraged, 
thinking  Ifhould  never  be  able  to  preach  any  more.     But  after- 
wards,  God   was   pleafed  to  give   me   fome  Relief  from  thefe 
Confufions :  But  ftill  1  was  afraid,  and   even   trembled  before 
God.     I  went  to  the  Place  of  publick  Worfhip,  lifting  up  my 
Heart  to  God  for  Afiiftance  and  Grace,   in  my  great  Work : 
And  God  was  gracious  to  me,  and  helped  me  to  plead  with  him 
for  Holinefs,and  to  \\(q  the  ftrongeft  Aigumenis  with  him, drawn 
from  the  Incarnation  and  SufFerings  of  Chrift  for  this  very  End, 
that  Men  might  be  made  holy.   Afterwards,  I  was  much  aflifted 
in  preaching.     1  know  not  that  ever  God  helped  me  to  preach 
inamore  clofe  and  diftinguifhingManner  for  thcTrial  of  Men's 
State.     Thro'  the  infinite  Gocdnefs  of  God,  I  felt  what  I  fpake  ; 
and  God  enabled  me  to  treat  on  divine  Truth  with  uncommon 
Clearnefs  :  And  yet  I  was  fo  fenfible  of  myDefe(3ts  inPreaching, 
that  I  could  not  be  proud  of  myPerformance,  as  at  fome  Times ; 
And  blefTed  be    the  Lord  for  this  Mercy.     In  the  Evening,  I 
bng'd  to  be  entirely  alone,  to  blefs  God   for  Help  in  a  Time  of 
Extremity  j  and  longed  for  great  Degrees  of  Holinefs,  that  I 
might  fhewmy  Gratitude  to  God. 

[  The  next  Morning,  he  fpent  fome  Time  before  Sun-rife  in 
Prayer,  in  the  fame  fweet  and  grateful  Frame  of  Mind,  that  he 
had  been  in  the  Evening  before  :  And  afterwards  went  to  his 
Indiam^  and  fpent  fome  Time  in  teaching  and  exhorting  them.] 

S  2  Tuefday, 


J^o    Mt,  if.  The  LIFE 

Tuefday,  OSfoh.  1 6.  Felt  a  Spirit  of  Solemnity  and  Watch- 
fulncfs  ;  was  afraid  I  {hould  not  live  to  and  upon  God  :  Longed 
for  more  Intenfenefs  and  Spirituality.  Spent  the  Day  in  Writ- 
ing ;  frequently  lifting  upmyHeart  to  God  for  more  Heavenly- 
mindednefs.  In  the  Evening,enjoyed  fweet  AfBftance  in  Prayer, 
and  thirfted  and  pleaded  to  be  as  holy  as  the  blelTed  Jngels  ; 
Longed  for  Minifterial  Gifts  and  Graces,  and  Succefs  in  my 
Work  :  Was  fweetly  afTifted  in  the  Duty  of  Interceffion,  and 
enabled  to  remember  and  plead  for  Numbers  of  dear  Friends, 
and  Chrift's  Mmifters. 

[He  feemed  to  have  much  of  the  fame  Frame  of  Mind,  the 
two  next  Days.] 

Friday,  O^ob,  19.  Felt  an  abafmg  Senfe  of  my  own  Impu- 
rity and  Unholinefs  ;  and  felt  my  Soul  melt  and  mourn,  that  £ 
had  abufed  and  grieved  a  very  gracious  God,  who  was  (till  kind 
to  me,  notwithftanding  all  my  Unworthinefs.  My  Soul  en- 
joyed a  fweet  Seafon  of  bitter  Repentance  and  Sorrow,  that  I 
had  wronged  that  blefTed  God,  who  (I  was  perfwaded  )  was 
reconciled  to  me  in  his  dear  Son.  My  Soul  was  now  tender, 
devout,  and  folemn.  And  I  was  afraid  of  nothing,  but  Sin  i 
and  afraid  of  that  in  every  Adion  and  Thought. 

[The  four  nextDays,were  manifeftly  fpent  in  a  moft  conftant 
TendernefsjWatchfulnefs, Diligence  and  Self- Diffidence.  But 
he  complains  ofWandrings  of  Mind, Languor  of  AfFedtions  b*^.] 

Wednefday,  Gcloh.  24.  Near  Noon,  rode  to  my  People  ; 
fpent  fome  Time,  and  pray'd  with  them  :  Felt  the  Frame  of  a 
Pilgrim  on  Earth  ;  longed  much  to  L-ave  this  gloomy  Manfion  ; 
but  yet  found  the  Exercife  of  Patience  and  Refignation.  And  as 
i"  returned  home  frora  the  Indians^  fpent  the  whole  Time  in 
lifting  up  my  Heart  to  God.  In  the  Evening,  enjoy'd  a  blefTed 
Seafon  alone  in  Prayer  ;  was  cnabied  to  cry  toGod  with  aChild- 
iike  Spirit,  for  the  Space  of  near  an  Hour:  Enjoyed  a  fweet 
Ineedom  in  fapplicating  for  my  felf,  for  dearFriend3,Minifters, 
and  fome  who  are  preparing  for  that  Work,  and  for  the 
Church  of  God  ;  and  longed  to  be  as  lively  my  felf  in  God's 
Service  as  the  Jngtls. 

Thurfday,  Ociob,  25.  Was  bufy  in  Writing.  Was  very 
fenfible  of  my  abfoluteDependance  on  God  in  allRefpeds  ;  fav/ 
ifhat  I  could  do  nothing  in  thofe  Affairs, that  I  have  fufficient  na- 
turalFacult[e6for,unlcfsGod  fhoald  fmileupon  my  Attempt.  AW 
that  zve are  fi^ff^cient  of  our  felvesy  to  think  anyTking^ai  vf  ourfelve^ >, 
vm  s,  facrc'd  Text  that  1  faw  tfee  Truih  uf. 

Friday^' 


c/Afr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1744.    131 

Friday,  Octob.  26.  In  the  Morning,  my  Soul  was  melted 
with  a  Senfe  of  divine  Goodnefs  and  Mercy  to  fuch  a  vile  un- 
worthy Worm  as  1  :  Delighted  to  lean  upon  Godjand  place  my 
whole  Truft  in  him  :  My  Soul  was  exceedingly  grieved  for 
Sin,  and  prized  and  longed  afterHolinefs ;  it  wounded  my  Heart 
deeply,  yet  fweeily,  to  think  how  I  had  abufed  a  kind  God. 
I  longed  to  be  perfedily  Holy, that  I  might  not  grieve  a  gracious 
God  ;  who  will  continue  to  love,  notwithftanding  his  Love  is 
abufed  :  I  longed  for  Holinefs  more  for  this  End,  than  I  did  for 
jny  own  Happinefs  fake  :  And  yet  this  was  my  greateft  Happi- 
rcfs,  never  more  to  difhonour,  but  always  to  glorify  the  blefled 
God.     Afterwards, rode  "Up  to  the  Indians^  in  theAfternoon,^^-. 

[  The  four  next  Days,  he  was  exercifcd  with  much  Diforder 
andPain  of  Body, with  a  Degree  of  Melancholy  andGloominefs 
of  Mind, bitterly  complaining  of  Deadnefs  andUnprofitablenefs, 
yet  mourning  and  longing  after  God.] 

Wednefday,  Octob.  31.  Was  fenfible  of  my  Barrennefs,  and 
Decays,  in  theThings  of  God  :  My  Soul  fail'd,  when  I  remem- 
bered the  Fervency  |  bad  enjoyed  at  the  Throne  of  Grace. 
Oh  (I  thought)  If  I  could  but  befpiritual,  warm,  heavenly- 
minded,  and  affectionately  breathing  after  God,  this  would  be 
better  thanLife  to  me  !  My  Soul  longed  exceedingly  forDeath, 
to  be  loofed  from  this  Dullnefs  andBarrennefsjand  made  forever 
a£tivc  in  the  Service  of  God.  I  feemed  to  live  for  nothing;,  and 
to  do  no  Good  :  And  Oh,  the  Burden  of  fuch  a  Life  I  Ob, 
Death,  Death,  my  kind  Friendjhaften  and  deliver  me  from  dull 
Mortality,  and  make  me  fpiritual  and  vigorous  to  Eternity. 

Thurfday,  November  i.  Had  but  little  Sweetnefs  in  divine 
Things.  But  afterwards,  in  the  Evening,  felt  fome  LUe,  and 
Longings  afterGod  5  I  longed  to  be  always  foiemn, devout,  and 
heavenly-minded  ;  &  v^as  afraid  to  leave  ofFprayingJeft  I  fhould 
9gain  lofe  a  Senfe  of  the  fweet  Things  of  God. 

Friday,  Nov,  2.  Was  fiird  with  Sorrow  and  Confufion,  m 
the  Morning,  and  could  enjoy  no  fweet  Senfe  of  divine  Things, 
nor  get  any  Relief  in  Prayer.  Sav/  I  deferved,  that  every  one  of 
God's  Creatures  fhould  be  let  loofe  upon  me  to  be  theExccutio* 
nets  of  his  Wrath  againft  me  :  And  yet  therein  I  faw  I  deferved 
what  I  did  not  fear  as  my  Portion.  About  Noon,  rode  up  to 
ehe  Indians ;  and  while  going,  could  ktX  no  Defires  for  them, 
and  even  dreaded  to  fay  any  Thing  to  'em  ;  but  God  was 
pleafed  tQ  give  ics  fome  Fr eedoip*  and  Enlargement,  aiid  made 

the 


"132      ^/.27-  ^^^   LIFE 

the  Seafon  comfortable  to  me.  In  the  Evening,hadEnlargement 
in  Prayer.  But  alas,  what  Comforts  and  Enlargements  I  have 
felt  for  thefe  many  Weeks  paft,  have  been  only  tranfient  &  {hort  ; 
and  the  greater  Part  of  my  Time  has  been  iill*d  up  with  Dead- 
nefs,  or  Struggles  with  Deadnefs,  and  bitter  Conflicts  with  Cor- 
ruption. I  have  found  my  felf  exercifed  forely  with  fome  parti- 
cular Things  that  I  thought  my  felf  moft  of  all  freed  from.  And 
thus  I  have  ever  found  it,  when  I  have  tho't  theBatlle  was  over, 
and  the  Conqueft  gained,  and  fo  let  down  my  Watch,  the  Ene- 
my has  rifenup  and  done  me  the  greateft  Injury. 

Saturday,  'Nov.  3.  I  read  the  Life  andTrials  of  a  godly  Man, 
and  was  much  warm*d  by  it  :  I  wondered  at  my  paftDeadnefs  ; 
and  was  more  convinced  of  it,  than  ever.  Was  enabled  to 
confefs  and  bewail  my  Sin  before  God,  with  Self-abhorrence. 

Lord's-Day,  ISJov.  4.  Had,  I  think,  fome  Exercife  of  Faith 
in  Prayer,  in  the  Morning  :  Long'd  to  be  Spiritual.  Had  con- 
fidcrableHclp  in  preaching  to  my  ^001  Indians :  Was  encouraged 
with  them,  and  hoped  that  God  defigned  Mercy  for  them. 

[  The  next  Day^  f  He  fet  out  on  a  Journey  to  New-York ^  to 
the  Meeting  of  the  Prejhytery  there  ;  and  was  gone  from  Home 
more  than  a  Fortnight.  lie  feem'd  to  enter  on  this  Journey 
with  great  Relu(5lance  j  fearing,  that  the  Diverfions  of  it  would 
prove  a  Means  of  cooling  his  rcligiousAfFe6lions,ashe  had  found 
m  other  Journeys.  But  yet,  in  thisjourney  he  had  fome  fpecial 
Seafons  wherein  he  enjoyed  extraordinary  Evidences  and  Fruits 
of  God's  graciousPrefence.  He  was  greatly  fatigued  and  expofed 
in  this  Journey  by  Cold  and  Storms  ;  And  when  he  returned 
from  NeiV'Torkio  New-Jerjey,  on  Friday,  was  taken  very  ill, 
and  was  detained  by  his  Dlneis  fome  Time.] 

Wednefday,  Nov.  21.  Rode  from  Newark  to  Rockciticus  \rx 
the  Cold,  and  was  almoft  overcome  with  it.  Enjoyed  fome 
Sweetnefs  in  Convcrfation  with  dear  Mr.  Jones,  while  I  dined 
with  him  :  My  Soul  loves  the  People  of  God,  and  efpecially  the 
Minifters  of  Jefas  Chrift,  who  feel  the  fame  Trials  that  I  do. 

Thurfday,  Nov.  22.  Came  on  my  Way  from  Rockciticus  to 
Dilaware  River.  Was  very  much  difordered  with  a  Cold  and 
Pain  in  my  Head.     About  6  at  Night,  I  loft  my  Way  in  the 


On  this  Day  he  concluded  his  Narrative^  that  is  at  the 
Fnd  of  his  Ordination  Sermon* 

Wildernefs, 


of  Mr.  David  Brainerd,     ;A.D.  1 744.      'J  ^  ^ 

Wildernefs,  and  wandered  over  Rocks  and  Mountains,  down 
hideousSteeps,  thro'  Swamps,  and  moft  dreadful  and  dangerous 
Places ;  And  the  Night  being  dark,  fo  that  few  Stars  could  be 
feen,  I  was  greatly  expofed  ;  Was  much  pinch*d  with  Cold, 
and  diftrefsM  with  an  extream  Pain  in  my  Head,  attended  with 
Sicknefs  at  my  Stomach  ;  fo  that  every  Step  I  took  was  diftrcf- 
fing  to  me.  I  had  little  Hope  for  feveral  Hours  together,  but 
that  I  muft  lie  out  in  the  Woods  all  Night,  in  this  diftrefled 
Cafe.  But  about  9  o'Clock,  I  found  a  Houfc,  thro'  theabun- 
dantGoodnefs  of  God,  and  was  kindly  entertained.  Thus  I  have 
frequently  beeq  expofed,  &  fometimeslain  out  the  whole  Night : 
but  God  has  hitherto  preferved  me  ;  and  blefTed  be  his  Name. 
Such  Fatigues  and  Hardfhips  as  thefe  ferve  to  wean  me  more 
from  the  Earth  ;  and,  I  truft,  will  make  Fleaven  the  fweeter. 
Formerly,  when  I  was  thus  expofed  to  Cold,  Rain,  ^c*  I  was 
ready  to  pleafe  my  felf  with  the  Thoughts  of  enjoying  a  com- 
fortable Houfe,  a  warm  Fire,  and  other  outward  Comforts; 
but  now  thefe  have  lefs  Place  in  my  Heart  ( thro'  the  Grace  of 
God  )  and  my  Eye  is  more  to  God  for  Comfort.  In  this  World 
I  exped  Tribulation  ;  and  it  does  not  now,  as  formerly,  appear 
ilrange  to  me  ;  I  don't  in  fuch  Seafons  of  Difficulty  flatter  my 
felf  that  it  will  be  better  hereafter  ;  but  rather  think, how  much 
worfe  it  might  be ;  how  much  greater  Trials  others  of  God's 
Children  have  endured  ^  and  how  much  greater  are  yet  per- 
haps refer ved  for  me.  Blefled  be  God,  that  he  makes  the 
Thoughts  of  my  Journey's  End  and  of  my  DifTolution  a  great 
Comfort  to  me,under  my  fharpeftTrials  ;  &  fcarce  ever  lets  thefe 
Thoughts  be  attended  with  Terror  or  Melancholy  s  but  they 
are  attended  frequently  with  great  Joy. 

Friday,  Nov,  23.  Vifited  a  Tick  Man  ;  difcourfed  and  pray'd 
with  him.  Then  vifited  another  Houfe,  where  was  one  dead  and 
laid  out ;  look'd  on  the  Corps, 'and  longed  that  my  Time  might 
come  to  depart^  that  I  might  be  zvith  Chrijf,  Then  went  home 
to  my  Lodgings,  about  one  o'Clock.  Felt  poorly  ;  but  was 
able  to  read,  moft  of  the  Afternoon. 

[  Within  the  Space  of  the  next  twelve  Days,  he  paffed  under 
many  Changes  in  the  Frames  and  Exercifes  of  his  Mind.  He  had 
many  Seafons  of  the  fpecial  Influences  of  God's  Spirit,  animat- 
ing, invigorating,  and  comforting  him  in  the  Ways  of  God  and 
Duties  of  Religion  ;  but  had  fome  Turns  of  great  Dejection 
and  Melancholy.  He  fpent  much  Tirae,  within  this  Space,  in 
hard'Labour,  with  others,  to  make  for  himfelf  a  little  Cottage 


.   134     ^^.  27:  «^  LIFE 

or  Hutjto  live  in  by  hinifelf  thro'  the  Winter,  Yet  he  frequently 
preached  to  thelndians^Si  fpeaks  offpecial  Afliftance  he  had  from 
Time  to  Time,  in  addreflinghimfelf  to  them  ;  And  of  his  fomc" 
times  having  confiderableEncouragementjfrom  theAttention  they 
gave.  ButonTuefdayZ)^f^w^.4.  he  vi^as  funk  into greatDifcou- 
ragement,  to  fee  'em  (  moft  of  'em  )  going  in  Company  to  an 
idolatrous  Fea/f  and  Dance^  after  he  had  taken  abundant  Pains 
with  them  to  difTwade  'em  from  thefe  Things.  ] 

Thurfday,  Decemh.  6.  Having  now  a  happy  Opportunity  of 
being  retired  in  a  Houfe  of  my  own,  which  I  have  lately  procur- 
ed and  moved  into,  and  confidering  that  it  is  now  a  long  Time 
fmce  I  have  been  able,  either  on  Account  of  bodily  Weaknefs, 
or  for  waat  of  Retirement,  or  fomc  other  Difficulty,   to  fpend 
any  Time  in  fecret  Faffing  and  Prayer  ;  confidering   alfo  the 
greatnefsofmyWork,  and  the  extream  Diflicuities  that  attend 
it :   And  that  my  poor  Indians  are  now  worjhipping  Devils^  not- 
withftandingall  the  Pains  I  have  taken  with  them,  which  almofi 
overwhelms  my  Spirit  :  Moreover,  confidering  my  extremeBar- 
renncfs,    fpiritual  Deadnefs   and  Dejedion,  of  late  ;  as  alfo  the 
Pov/er  of  fome  particular  Corruptions  ;  I  fat  apart  this  Day  for 
fecret  Prayer  and  Fafting,  to  implore  the  BlefTing  of  God  on  my 
fclf,  on  ray  poor  People,  on  my  Friends,  and  on  the  Church  of 
God.      At  firff,  I  felt  a  great  Backwardnefs  to  the  Duties  of  the 
Day,  on  Account  of  the  feeming  Impoffibility  of  performing 
them:  But  the  Lord  helped  me    to  break  thro' this  Difficulty. 
God  was  pleafed,    by  the  Ufe  of  Means,  to  give  me  fome  clear 
Convidion  of  my  Sinfulnefs,  and  a  Difcovcry  of   the  Plague  of 
my  own  Hearty   more    afte£ling  than  what  I  have  of  late  had. 
And  efpecially  I  faw  my  Sinfulnefs  in  this,    that  when  God  had 
withdrawn  himfelf,  then,  inftead  of  living  and  dying  in  Purfuit 
of  him,  I  have  been  difpofed  to  one  of  thele   two  Things  ;  ei- 
ther (  firft  )  to  yield  an  unbecoming  P.efped  to  fome  earthlyOh- 
je61s,  as  if  Happincfs  were  to  be  derived  from  them  ;  or  (2dJy) 
to  be  kcTt\\y  froward  and  impatient,  and  unfuitably  defirous   of 
Deaih^  fo  that  [  have  fomctimcs  tbo't  I  could  not   bear   to  think 
my  Li/e  mutt  belengthcn'd  out.     And  that  which  often  drove 
me  to  this  impatient  Dcure  of  Death,  was  aDefpair  of  doing  any 
Good  in  Life  ;  and  I  chofe  Death,  rather  than  a  Life  fpent  for 
Nothing.     But  now  God  made  me  fenfible  of  my  Sin  in  thefe 
Things,  and  enabled  me  to  cry    to  him  for   Forgivenefs.     Yet 
this  was  not  all  {  wanted  \  for   my  Soul  appeared  exceedingly 
poJluted.  my  Heart  feem'd  like  a  Nefl  of  Vip-r?.  or  a  Cage  of 

unclean 


i/ M".  David  Braincrd.     A.D.1744,;      135 

unclean  and  hateful  Birds  :  And  therefore  I  wanted  to  be  pu- 
iified  by  the  Blood  ef  Sprinklings  that  clean ftth  from  all  Sin,  And 
this,  I  hopcjl  was  enabled  to  pray  for  inFaith.  I  enjoyed  much 
more  Intenfenefs,  Fervency,  andSpirituality,  than  I  expe6led; 
God  was  better  to  me  than  my  Fears.  And  towards  Night, 
I  felt  my  Soul  rejoyce,  that  God  is  unchangeably  happy  and 
glorious  ;  that  he  will  be  glorified,  whatever  becomes  of  his 
Creatures.  I  was  enabled  to  perfevere  in  Prayer  'till  fomeTime 
in  the  Evening  :  At  whichTime  I  faw  fo  much  Need  of  divine 
Help,  in  every  Refpedt,  that  I  knew  not  how  to  leave  ofF,  and 
had  forgot  that  I  needed  Food.  This  Evening,  I  was  much 
affifted  in  meditating  on  I/ai,  lii.  3.  Blefled  be  the  Lord  for 
any  Help  in  the  paft  Day. 

Friday,  Decemb.  7.  Spent  fome  Time  in  Prayer,  in  the 
Morning  ;  enjoyed  fome  Freedom  and  Affe6Jion  in  the  Duty, 
and  had  longing  Defires  of  being  made  faithful  to  the  Death, 
Spent  a  little  Time  in  writing  on  a  divine  Subjedl  :  Then 
vifited  the  Indians,  and  preachM  to  *em.  But  under  inexpreffi- 
ble  Dejedlion :  1  had  no  Heart  to  fpeak  to  them,  and  could 
not  do  it,  but  as  I  forced  my  fclf :  I  knew,  they  muft  hate  to 
hear  me,  as  having  but  juft  got  Home  from  their  idolatrous 
Feaft  and  Devil- Worfhip.—- In  the  Evening,  had  fome  Free ^ 
dom  in  Prayer  and  Meditation. 

Saturday,  Decern.  8.  Have  been  uncommonly  free  this  Day 
from  Dejedlion,  and  from  that  diftrelHng  Apprehenfion,  that. 
I  could  do  nothing  :  Was  enabled  to  pray  and  ftudy  with  feme 
Comfort ;  and  efpecially  was  affifted  in  writing  on  a  divine 
Subje6l.  In  the  Evening,  my  Soul  rejoyced  in  God  ;  and 
I  blefs'd  his  Name  for  fhining  en  my  Soul.  O  the  fv/eet 
and  blefTed  Change  I  then  felt,  when  God  brought  me  out  of 
Darknefi  into  his  marvellous  Light  I 

Lord*s-Day,  Decern.  9.  Preach'd,  both  Parts  of  the  Days*' 
at  a  Place  caird  Greenwich^  in  JsJew-Jerfey^  about  10 Miles  from 
my  own  Houfe.  In  the  firft  Difcourfe  I  had  fcarcc  any  Warmth 
or  afFe6lionate  Longing  forSouis.  In  the  Intermiffion-Seafon  I 
got  alone  among  the  Bufhes,  and  cried  to  God  for  Pardon  of  my 
Deadnefs  ;  and  was  in  Anguifh  and  Bitternefs,  that  I  courfd  not 
addrcfs  Souls  with  more  Compaflion  and  tender  Affe6lion  z 
Judged  and  condemned  my  felf  for  want  of  this  divineTemper  : 
Tho'  I  faw  I  could  not  get  it  as  of  my  felf,  any  more  than  I 
could  make  a  World.  In  the  latter  Exercife,  blefTed  be  the 
Lord,  I  had  fome  Fervency,  both  in  Prayer  andPreaching  ;  ani 
efpecially  in  the  Application  of  my  Difcgurfij  was  enabled  to 

T  '        ■    "  add.^efa 


1^6   2Et.  27:  ITy&i?  L  I  F  E 

addrefs  precious  Souls  with  AfFe6lion, Concern,  Tendcrnefs  and 
Importunity.  The  Spirit  of  God,  I  think,  was  there  ;  as  the 
Effe£ls  were  apparent,  Tears  running  down  many  Cheeks. 

Monday,  Decern.  10.  Near  Noon,  I  preach'd  again  :  God 
gave  me  Tome  AfTiftance,  and  enabled  me  to  be  in  fome  Degree 
faithful  ;  fo  that  I  had  Peace  in  my  own  Soul,  and  a  very  com- 
fortable Compofure,  aliho*  Ifrael  fhould  not  he  gathered.  Came 
away  iromGreenwich^and  rodeHome  ;  arrived  juft  in  theEvening. 
By  the  Way,  my  Soul  blefs'd  God  for  his  Goodnefs  ;  and  I 
rejoyced,  that  fomuch  of  my  Work  was  done,  and  I  fo  much 
nearer  my  bleffcd  Reward.  Blefled  be  God  for  Grace  to  be 
faithful. 

Tuefday,  Decern.  11.  Felt  very  poorly  in  Body,being  much 
tired  and  worn  out  the  laft  Night.  Was  aflifted  in  fome  Mea- 
fure  in  writing  on  a  divineSubje(£l :  But  was  fo  feeble  and  fore  in 
my  Breaft,  that  I  had  not  much  Refoiution  in  my  Work.  Oh, 
how  I  long  for  thatWorld  where  the  weary  are  atReJi  !  And  yet 
thro'  the  Goodnefs  of  God  I  don't  now  feel  impatient. 

Wednefday,  Decern.  12.  Was  again  very  weak  ;  but  fome- 
what  afTifted  in  fccret  Prayer,  and  enabled  with  PJeafure  and 
Sweetnefs  to  cry ^  Come ,  Lord  Je/us  f  Come,  Lordjefus;  come 
quickly,  My  So\i\  longed  for  God,  for  the  living  God.  O  how 
celightful  it  is,  to  pray  under  fuch  fweet  Influences  !  Oh  how 
much  better  is  this, than  one's  neceJfaryFooi  !  I  had  at  thisTime 
no  Difpofition  to  eat  ( tho'  late  in  the  Morning  ;  )  for  earthly 
Food  appeared  wholly  Taftlefs.  O  how  much  better  is  thy  Love 
than  PVine,  than  the  fweeteft  Wine  !—  I  vifited  and  preached 
to  the  Indians,  in  the  Afternoon  ;  but  under  much  Dejection. 
Found  my  Interpreter  under  fome  Concern  for  his  Soul  ;  which 
was  fome  Comfort  to  me  ;  and  yet  fiil'd  me  with  new  Cire. 
I  longed  greatly  for  his  Converfion  ;  lifted  up  myHeart  to  God 
for  it, while  I  was  talking  to  him  :  CameH'.me,ar?d  poured  out 
my  Soul  to  God  for  him  :  Enjoyed  fome  t  reedom  in  Prayer, 
and  was  enabled,  I  think,  to  leave  all  with  God. 

Thurfday,  Decern.  13.  Endeavoured  to  fpend  the  Day  in 
Fafting  and  Piayei,  to  implore  the  divine  Blefling,  moreefpeci- 
aljy  on  my  poor  People  ;  and  in  particular,  {  fought  for  con- 
verting Grace  for  my  Interpreter,  and  three  or  four  mo;:e  under 
fome  Concern  for  their  Souls.  I  was  much  difordered  in  the 
Mornijig  when  I  arofe  ;  but  having  determined  to  fpend  theDay 
in  this  Manner,!  attempted  it.  SomeKreedom  I  had  in  pleading  \ 
for  thefe  poor  concerned  Souls,  feveral  Times  ;  and  when  in- 
tcrceeditig  for  them,  I  enjoyed  greater  Freedom  from  wandring 

and 


^  Mr,  David  Brainerd:       A.D.  1 744.;     13 7 

iind  di(lra6ling  Thoughts,  than  in  any  Part  of  my  Supplications  : 
But,  in  the  general,  was  greatly  exercifed  with  Wandrings  ;  fo 
that  in  the  Evening  it  feemed  as  if  1  had  need  to  pray  for  no- 
thing (o  much  as  for  thePardon  of  Sins  committed  in  theDay  paft, 
and  the  Vilenefs  I  then  found  in  ray  felf.  TheSins  I  had  moftSenfii 
of,  were  Pride,  and  wandring  Thoughts,  whereby  1  mocked 
God.  The  former  of  thefe  curfed  Iniquities  excited  me  to  think 
of  writing,  or  preaching,  or  converting  Heathen,or  performing 
ibme  other  great  Work,  that  my  Name  might  live  when  I  fhould 
be  dead.  My  Soul  was  in  Anguifh,  and  ready  to  drop  into 
Defpair,  to  find  fo  much  of  that  curCsd  Temper.  With  this, 
and  the  other  Evil  I  laboured  under,  viz,  wandring  Thoughts, 
I  was  almoft  overwhelmed,  and  even  ready  to  give  over  {driving 
after  aSpiritof  Devotion  ;  and  oftentimes  funk  into  a  confidera- 
ble  Degree  of  Defpondency,  and  thought  I  was  more  bruii(h  than 
any  Man.  Yet  after  all  my  Sorrows,  1  truft  thro*  Grace,  this 
Day  and  the  Exercifes  of  it  hive  been  for  my  Good,  and  taught 
me  more  of  my  Corruption,  and  Weaknefs  without  Chrift,  than 
I  knew  before. 

Friday,  Decern.  14.  Near  Noon,  went  to  the  Indians ;  but 
knew  not  what  to  fay  to  them,  and  was  afhamed  to  look  them 
in  the  Face  :  I  felt  I  had  no  Power  to  addrefs  their  Confciences, 
and  therefore  had  no  Boldnefs  to  fay  any  Thing.  Was,  much 
of  the  Day,  in  a  great  Degree  of  Defpair  about  ever  doing  or 
feeing  any  Good  in  the  Land  of  the\Living, 

[  He  continued  under  the  fame  De;d6!ioi  the  next  Day.] 

Lord's- Day,  Decern.  16.  Was  fo  overwhelmed  with  De- 
jeaion,that  I'knew  not  how  to  live  :  I  long'd  forDeath  exceed- 
ingly :  My  Soul  v^zs  funk  into  deep  Waters.,  and  the  Floods  were 
ready  to  drown  me  :  I  was  fo  much  opprefs'd,  that  my  Soul  was 
in  a  kind  of  Horrour  :  I  could  not  keep  my  Thoughts  fixed  in 
Prayer,  for  the  Space  of  one  Minute,  without  Fluttering  andDi- 
ftradtion  :  I  was  exceedingly  afliamed,thatl  did  not  live  toGod  : 
I  had  no  diftrefling  Doubt  about  my  own  State  ;  but  would 
have  cheerfully  ventured  (  as  far  as  I  could  polTibly  know)  into 
Eternity.  While  I  was  going  to  preach  to  the  Indians,  my 
Soul  was  in  Anguifh  ;  I  was  fo  overborn  withDifcouragement  ; 
thatldcfpair*d  of  doing  any  Good,  and  was  driven  to  my  Wita 
End  ;  I  knew  nothing  what  to  fay,  nor  what  Courfe  to  take. 
But  at  laft  I  infifted  on  the  Evidence  we  have  of  the  Truth  of 
Chriftianity  from  the  iW/rtfr/^^  of  Chrift  i  many  of  which  I  fet 
-  -  T  2  before 


138    -ffi/.  2/:  TbeLlFE 

before  them :  And  God  helped  me  to  make  a  clofe  Application 
to  thofe  that  refufed  to  believe  theTruth  of  what  I  taught  them  : 
And  indeed  I  was  enabled  to  fpeak  to  the  Confciences  of  all, 
in  fome  Meafure.  I  was  fomething  encouraged,  to  find,  that 
God  enabled  me  to  be  faithful  once  more.  Then  came  and 
preached  to  another  Company  of  them ;  but  was  very  weary 
and  faint.  In  the  Evening,  I  was  fomething  refrefh'd,  and  was 
enabled  to  pray  andpraife  God  with  Compofure  and  AfFeftion  : 
Had  fome  Enlargement  andCourage  with  Refpeil  tomyVVork  : 
Was  willing  to  live,  and  longed  to  do  more  for  God,  than  my 
weak  ftate  of  B  jdy  woald  admit  of.  /  can  do  all  Things  through 
Chriji  that  Jlrengthem  me  ;  and  by  his  Grace,  I  am  willing  to 
fpend  2,^^  he  [pent  in  his  Service,  when  lam  not  thus  funk  in 
£)ejj6lion  and  a  kind  of  Defpair. 

Monday,  Decern.  17.  Was  fomething  comfortable  in  MinJ, 
moft  of  the  Day  ;  and  was  enabled  to  pray  with  fome  Freedom, 
Cheerfulnefs,  Conipofure,  and  Devotion  ;  had  aUo  fome  Af» 
firtance  in  writing  on  a  divine  Subjeih 

Tuefdavj  Z)^f^/«^.  18.  Went  to  the /«i/(3«;,  and  difcourfed 
to  them,  near  an  Hour,  without  any  Power  to  come  clofe  to 
their  Hearts.  But  at  laft,  I  felt  fome  Fervency,  andGod  helped 
me  to  fpeak  witlv  Warmth.  My  Intnpreter  alfo  was  amazingly 
afiifted  ;  and  I  doubt  not  hwttheSpirit  o/God  was  upon  him  (tho* 
I  had  no  R-eafon  to  think  he  had  any  true  and  faving  Grace,  but 
was  only  under  Convidion  of  his  loft  State  ;  )  and  prefently 
lipon  this  moft  of  the  grown  Perfons  were  much  affecSled,  and 
the  Tears  ran  down  their  Cheeks ;  and  one  oldMan  (  I  fuppofe, 
an  hundred  Years  old  }  was  fo  afFedled,  that  he  wept, and  feem'd 
convinced  of  the  Importance  of  what  I  taught  them.  I  ftaid 
■with  them  a  confiderable  Time,  exhorting  and  dire6iing  them  j 
and  came  away,  lifting  up  my  Heart  toGod  in  Prayer  andPraife, 
and  encouraged  and  exhorted  my  Interpntgr  to  /irive  to  enter  in 
at' the  ji rait  Gate.  Came  home,  and  fpent  moft  of  the  Evening 
in  Prayer  and  Tiunlcfgiving  ;  and  found  my  felf  much  enlarged 
snd  quicken'd.  Was  greatly  concerned,  that  the  Lord'3 
Work  which  feem'd  to  be  begun, might  be  carried  onwithPower, 
to  the  Converfion  of  poor  Souls, and  the  Glory  of  divine  Grace. 

Wednefday,  Decemh.  19.  Spent  a  greatPart  of  theDay  inPray* 
er  to  God  for  the  Outpouring  of  his  Spirit  on  my  poor  People  ; 
«s  alfo  to  blefs  his  Name  for  awakning  my  Interpreter^  and  fome 
others,  and  giving  us  fome  Tokens  of  his  Prcfence  Yefterday- 
And  blefted  be  God,  I  had  much  Freedom,  five  or  fix  Times 
ifi  the  D^y^  in  Pra^'cr  and  Pfaife,    ?^?A  felt  a  weighty  Concern 

upon 


of  Mr,  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1 744;     139 

tspon  my  Spirit  for  the  Salvation  of  thofe  precious  Souls,  and 
the  Enlargement  of  the  Redeemer's  Kingdom  among  them.  My 
Soul  hoped  inGod  for  fomeSuccefs  m  my  Miniftry  :  And  blefled 
be  his  Name  forfo  much  Hope. 

Thurfday,  Decemb.  20.  Was  enabled  to  vifit  the  Throne  of 
Grace  frequently,  this  Day  ;  and  thro*  divine  Goodnefs  enjoy- 
ed much  Freedom  and  Fervency,  fundry  Times  :  Was  much 
ailifted  in  crying  for  Mercy  for  my  poor  People,  and  feltChear- 
fulnefs  and  Hope  in  my  Requefts  for  them.  I  fpent  much  of 
£he  Day  in  Writing  3  but  was  enabled  to  intermix  Prayer  with 
my  Studies. 

Fndzy^Decemh.21.  Was  enabled  again  to  pray  wIthFreedom, 
Chearfulnefs,  and  Hope.  God  was  pleafed  to  make  the  Duty 
comfortable  and  pleafant  to  me  ;  fo  that  1  delighted  to  perfe- 
vere,  and  repeatedly  to  engage  in  it.  Towards  Noon,  vifited 
my  People,  and  fpent  the  whole  Time  in  the  Way  to  them  ia 
Prayer,  longing  io  fee  the  Power  of  God  among  them,  as  there 
appeared  fomething  of  it  the  lafl  Tuefday  ;  and  1  found  it  fweet 
to  reft  and  hope  in  God*  Preach'd  to  them  twice,  and  at  two 
diftin6l  Places  :  Had  confiderable  Freedom,  each  Time,  and 
ioh^(i  my  Interpreter,  Several  of  'em  followed  me  from  one 
Place  to  the  other  :  And  I  thought,  there  was  fome  divine  In- 
fluence difcernable  amongft  them.  In  the  EvcningjWas  afTifted 
ID.  Prayer  again.  BlefTed,  blefled  be  the  Lord. 

[  Very  much  the  fame  Things  are  cxprefled  concerning  his 
inward  Frame,  Exercifes,  and  Afiiftances  on  Saturday,  as  on 
the  preceeding  Days.  He  obferves,  that  this  was  a  comfortable 
Week  to  him.  •  But  then  concludes,  Oh  !  That  1  had  mReafon 
to  complain  of  much  Barrenmfs.  Oh  that  there  were  no  vainThoUs 
end  evil  AffeSliom  lodging  within  me,  The  Lord  knows  how  1  long 
for  that  IVorld^  where  they  reft  not  Day  nor  Nighty  f^y^^*iy  Holy, 
Jtioly^  Holy,  ii  the  Lord  God  Almighty y  he.  On  the  following 
Sabbath,  he  fpeaks  of  Affiftance  and  Freedom  in  his  publicls 
Work,  but  as  having  lefs  of  the  fenfible  Prefence  of  God,  than 
frequently  in  (he  Week  paft :  But  yet  fay3,hisSoul  was  kept  from 
finking  in  Dilcouragement.  On  Monday,  again  he  feem'd  to 
enjoy  very  much  the  fame  Liberty  and  Fervency,  thro'  theDay, 
that  he  enjoyed  thro'  the  greaterPartof  the  preceeding  Week.*] 


This  Day  he  wrote  the  fifth  Litttr  added  at  the  End  of 
this  Hiflory, 

Tuefday,' 


¥46    ^^/.  2 7'  y^^   LIFE         A.a  1 745; 

Tuefday,  Decemh.  l5.EnjoyM  very  little  quietSleeplaftNight; 
by  Reafon  of  bodily  Weaknefs,  and  the  clofenefs  of  my  Studies 
Yefterday  :  YetmyHeart  was  fomewhat  lively  in  Prayer&Praifc  : 
I  was  delighted  with  the  divine  Glory  and  Happinefs,  and  re- 
joyced  that  God  was  God,  &  that  he  was  unchangeably  poflefs'd 
of  Glory  and  BlefTednefs.  Tho*  God  held  my  Eyes  waking,  yet 
he  helped  me  ^o  improve  my  Time  profitably  amidft  my  Pains 
and  Weaknefs,  in  continued  Meditations  on  Lukexm,  ^.Behold 
ihefe  three  Tears  I  come  JeeUng  Fruity  &c.  My  Meditations  were 
fweet  j  and  1  wanted  to  fet  before  Sinners  their  Sin  andDanger. 

[  He  continued  in  a  very  low  State,  as  to  his  bodily  Health, 
for  fome  Days  :  Which  feems  to  have  been  a  great  Hindrance 
to  him  in  his  religious  Exercifes  and  Purfuits.  But  yet  he  ex- 
prefTes  fome  Degree  of  divine  AiTiftance,  from  Day  to  Day, 
thro'  the  remaining  Part  of  this  Week.  He  preached  feveral 
Times  this  Week  to  his  Indians  ;  and  there  appeared  ftill  fome 
Concern  amongft  them  for  theirSouls.  OnSaturday,  he  rode  to 
the  Jrip  Settlement,  about  15  Miles  from  his  Lodgings^in  order 
to  fpend  the  Sabbath  there.  ] 

Lord's-Day,  Decemh,  30.  Difcourfed,  both  Parts  of  the  Day, 
from  Mark  viii.  34.  Who fcever  will  come  after  me^  &c.  God  gave 
me  very  great  Freedom  and  Clearnefs,  and  ( in  the  Afternoon 
efpecially  )  confiderable  Warmth  and  Fervency.  In  tfce  Even- 
ing alfo,  had  very  great  Clearnefs  while  converfing  with  Friends 
on  divine  Things  :  I  don't  remember  ever  to  have  had  more 
clear  Apprehenfions  of  Religion  in  myLife  :  But  found  a  Strug- 
gle, in  the  Evening,  with  fpiritual  Piide. 

[On  Monday,  he  preach'd  again  in  the  fame  Place  v/ith 
Freedom  and  Fervency  ;  and  rode  home  to  his  Lodging  ;  and 
arrived  in  the  Evening,  under  a  confiderable  Degree  of  bodily 
Illnefs,  which  continued  the  two  next  Days.  And  he  complains 
much  of  fpiritual  Emptinefs  and  Barrennefs  on  thofe  Days. J 

Thurfday,7<2«r/flry  3.1744^5.  Being fenfiblc  of  the  great  want 
of  divine  Influences,  and  the  out-pouring  of  God's  Spirit,  I  fpent 
this  Day  in  Fafling  and  Prayer,  to  feck  fo  great  a  Mercy  for  my 
felf,  and  my  pcor  People  in  particular,  and  for  the  Church  of 
God  in  general.  In  the  Morning,  was  very  Lifelefs  in  Prayer, 
and  could  get  fcarce  any  Senfe  of  God.  Near  Noon,  enjoyed 
fome  fweet  Freedom  to  pray  that  the^/7/^  G^</ might  in  tvtxy 

-  Refpedt 


e/ Mr,  David  Braincfd:     AD,  i'745;     14^ 

Rcfpe6l  become  mine  :  And  I  am  perfwaded,  it  was  fo  at  that 
Time  in  fome  good  Degree.  In  the  Afternoon,  I  was  exceeding 
weak,  and  could  not  enjoy  much  Fervency  in  Prayer  ;  but  felt 
a  great  Degree  of  Dejedion  ;  which,  I  believe,  was  very  m«ch 
©Ving  to  my  bodily  Weaknefs  and  Difordcr. 

Friday,  Jan.  4.  Rode  up  to  the  Indians^  near  Noon  ;  fpent 
fome  Time  there  under  greatDifofder  :  My  Soul  vitls  funk  down 
into  dseplVaUrs^zxi^  1  was  almoft  overwhelmed  withMelancholy. 

Saturday,  Jan.  5.  Was  able  to  do  fomething  at  Writing  i 
but  was  much  difordered  with  Pain  in  my  Head.  At  Night,  was 
cHftrefs'd  with  a  Senfe  of  my  fpiritual  Pollution,  and  ten  Thou- 
fand  youthful,  yea,  and  childifli  Follies,  that  no  Body  but  my 
idi  had  any  Thought  about  ;  all  which  appeared  to  me  now 
frefh,  and  in  a  lively  View,  as  if  committed  Yefterday, and  made 
my  Soul  afhamed  before  God,  and  caufed  me  to  hate  my  felf. 

Lord's- Day,  Jan.  6.  Was  ftill  diftrefs'd  with  vapoury  Dif^ 
orders.  Preached  to  my  poor  Indians  ;  but  had  little  Heart  or 
Life.  Towards  Night,  my  Soul  was  prefs'd  under  a  Senfe  of 
inyUnfaiihfulnefs.  O  the  Joy  &  Peace  that  arifes  from  a  Senfe 
of  having  obtain' dMercy  of  God  to  be  faithful  J  And  Oh,theMifery 
andAnguifh  that  fpring  from  an  Apprehenfion  of  the  contrary  ! 

[  His  Dejection  continued  the  two  next  Days  ;  but  not  to 
fo  great  a  Degree  on  Tuefday,  when  he  enjoyed  fome  Freedom 
and  Fervency  in  preaching  to  the  Indians.^ 

Wednefday,  Jan.  9.  In  the  Morning,  God  was  pleas'd  to 
remove  that  Gloom  which  has  of  late  opprefs'd  my  Mind,  and 
gave  me  Freedom  and  Sweetnefs  in  Prayer.  I  was  encouraged 
and  f^rengthe'd,  and  enabled  to  plead  for  Grace  for  my  {t\i^  and 
Mercy  for  my  poor  Indians  ;  and  was  fweetly  afTilted  in  my 
Interceflions  with  God  for  others.  BlcfTed  be  his  holy  Name 
forever  and  ever  ;  Amen,  and  Amen.  Thofe  Things  that  of 
late  have  appeared  moft  difficult  and  almoft  impoflible,  now  ap- 
peared not  only  poffible,  but  eafy.  My  Soul  fo  much  delighted 
to  continue  infant  in  Prayer,  at  this  blcfled  Seafon,  that  i  had 
noDefire  for  my  necejfary  Food :  even  dreaded  leaving  ofFpraying 
at  all, led  I  fliould  lofe  this  Spirituality, and  this  blefTedl'hankful- 
nefs  to  God  which  I  then  felt.  I  felt  now  quite  willing  to  Vive, 
and  undergo  all  Trials  that  might  remain  for  me  in  a  World  of 
Sorrow  ;  but  llill  longed  for  Heaven,  that  I  might  glorify  God 
in  a  perfect  Manner.  O  comey  Lord  Jefus,  come  quickly.  Spent 
the  Day  in  Readiog  a  little  ;  and  in  fome  Diveifions,  which  f 
was  neceiTitated  to  take  by  Reafon  of  much  Weaknefs  and 
Diiordcr.  In  the  Evening,  enjoyed  fomeFrcedom  and  Intenfe- 
Defs  in  Prayer.  '  [The 


'1 42    /£/.  27;  W^LIFE 

[  The  three  remaining  Days  of  the  Week,  he  was  very  \ov9 
and  feeble  inBody  ;  but  nevcrthelefs  continued  conftantly  in  the 
fame  comfortable  fweet  Frame  of  Mind,  as  is  exprelTed  onWed- 
nefday.  On  the  Sabbath,  this  Swoetnefs  and  fpiritual  Alacrity 
began  to  abate  :  But  ftill  he  enjoyed  fome  Degree  of  Comfort5 
snd  had  Alliance  in  preaching  to  the  Indians.} 

Monday,  Jan.  14.  Spent  this  Day  under  a  great  Degree  of 
bodily  Weaknefs  and  Djforder  ;  and  had  very  little  Freedom, 
either  in  my  Studies  or  Devotions  :  And  in  the  Evening,  I  was 
ihuch  dcjedled  and  melancholy.  It  pains  and  diftrenes  me, 
that  I  live  Co  much  of  my  Time  for  nothing.  I  long  to  do  much 
in  a  little.Tirae,  and  if  it  might  be  the  Lord's  will,  \q  finijh  my 
If^ork  (peedlly  in  this  tirefom  World.  Vm  fure,  I  don't  defire 
to  live  for  any  Thing  in  this  World  ;  and  thro'  Grace  I  am 
not  afraid  to  look  the  King  of  Terrors  in  the  Face :  1  know,  I 
fhallbeafraid,  if  God  leaves  me  ;  and  therefore  I  think  it  always 
Duty  to  lay  in  for  that  folemn  Hour.  But  for  a  very  confidera- 
ble  Time  pafl^,  my  Soul  has  rejoyced  to  think  of  Death  in  its 
neareft  Approaches  ;  and  even  when  I  have  been  very  weak, and 
feem'd  neareft  Eternity.  Not  unto  me^  not  unto  me.,  but  to  God 
be  the  Glory,  I  feel  that  which  convinces  me,  that  if  God  don't 
enable  me  to  maintain  a  holy  Dependance  upon  him, Death  will 
eafijy  be  a  Terrourto  me;  but  at  prefent,  Imuft  fay,  1  long  to 
depart  end  to  be  with  ChriJ}^  which  is  beft  of  all.  When  I  am  in 
a  fweet  refigned  Frame  of  Soul,  I  am  willing  to  tarry  a  while  in 
a  World  of  Sorrow,  J  am  willing  to  be  from  Home  as  long  as 
God  fees  fit  it  flioulcj  be  fo  :  But  when  I  want  the  Influence  of 
this  Temper,  I  am  then  apt  to  be  impatient  to  be  gone.---  Oh 
when  will  the  Day  appear,  that  I  fhall  be  perfect  m  Holinefs, 
and  in  the  Enjo)ment  of  God  ! 

[  The  next  Day  was  fpent  unc!er  a  great  Degree  of  Deje£lion 
andMelancholy  ;  which  (  as  he  himfelf  fays,  he  was  perfwaded  ) 
was  (Twing  partly  to  bodily  Weaknefs,  and  vapouryDiforders.J 

Wednefday,  &  ThurHay,  Jan.  16  &  17.  I  fpent  moft  of 
theTime  in  writing  on  a  fweet  divine  Subject, and  enjoyed  fome 
Freedom  and  AfTiftance.  Was  11  fcewife  enabled  to  pray  more 
frequently  and  fervently  than  ufual  :  and  my  Soul,  1  think, 
ipjosced  Ir  God  ;  efpecially  on  the  Evening  of  the  laft  of  thefe 
Days  :  Proife\\]tt\  fcem'd  comely^  and  I  delighted  to  blefs  the 
Lord.     O   what  Rc'jfon  have  1  tobe  thankful,  that  God  ever 

help? 


of  Mr,  David  Brainerc!.         A.D.1745.    14^' 

helps  me  to  Labour  and  Study  for  him  !  He  does  but  receive  his 
«?«;«, when  I  am  enabled  in  anyMeafure  to  praife  him, labour  for 
him,  and  live  to  him.  Oh,  how  comfortable  and  Tweet  it  is, 
to  feel  the  Affiftance  of  divine  Grace  in  the  Performance  of  the 
Duties  God  has  enjoined  us  !   Blefi  the  Lordy  O  my  SouL 

[  The  fame  Enlargement  of  Heart  and  joy  fulFrame  of  Soul 
continued  thro'  the  next  Day.  But  on  the  Day  following  it 
began  to  decline  ;  which  Decay  feems  to  have  continued  the 
whole  of  the  next  Week  :  Yet  he  enjoyed  fome  Seafons  of 
fpccial  and  fweet  Afliltance.] 

Lord's- Day i   Jan.  27.     Had  the  greatefl  Degree  of  inward 
Anguifti,   that    almoft  ever  I  endured  :   I  was   perfeaiy  over- 
whelmed,  and  fo  confufed,that  after  I  began  to  difcourfe  to  the 
Indians,  before  1  could  finifti  a  Sentence,  fometimes  I  forgot  en- 
tirely what  I  was  aiming  at ;  or  if,  with  much  difficulty,  I  had 
recoIle£ted  what  I  had  before  defigned,  ftill  it  appeared  ff  range, 
and  like  fomething  I  had    long  forgotten,  and   had  now  but  an 
imperfect   Remembrance   of.     I    know,   it  was  a  Degree    of 
Diftra£tion,    occafion'd    by  vapoury    Diforders,  Melancholy, 
fpiritual  Defertion,   and  fome  other   Things  that  particularly 
prefs'd  upon  me,  this  Morning,  with    an  uncommon  Weiirht, 
the   principal  of   which  refpe<Sed  my  Indians.     This  diflreffing 
Gloom  never  went  ofFthe  whole  Day  ;  but  v/asfo  far  removed, 
that  I  was  enabled  to  fpeak   with  fome  Freedom  and    Concern 
to  the  Indians,  at  two  of  their  Settlements  ;  and  I  think,  there 
was  fome   Appearance  of  the  Prefence  of  God  with  us,  fome 
Serioufnefs,  and  feeming  Concern  among  the  Indians,  at  leaft  a 
few  of  them.     In  the  Evening,  this  Gloom  continued  ftiil,  'till 
Family-Prayer,  *  aboat  nine  o'CIock,  and  almoft    thro'  this, 
until  I  came   near  the  Clofe,  when  I  was  praying  (  as  I  ufually 
do)  for  the  Illumination  andConverfion  of  my  poor  People  ;  and 
then  the  Cloud  was  fcatter'd^   fo  that  I  enjoy 'd   Sweetnefa   and 
Freedom,  and  conceived  Hopes,   that  God  defianed  Mercy  for 
fome  of  them.  The  fame  I  enjoyed  afterwards  in  fecrstPnyer  ; 


* 


Tho'  Mr.  Brainerd  now  dwelt  by  himfelf  in  the  foremen- 
tion'd  littleCottage, which  he  had  built  for  his  ownUre,yet 
that  was  near  to  a  Family  of  white  People  with  whom  he 
had  lived  before^  and  with  whom  he  ftill  attended  Family- 
Fray  er, 

V  in 


144    ^^-  27.  5^^^  LIFE 

in  which  preciousDutv  I  had  for  a  confiderable  Time  Sweet-* 
nefs  and  Freedom,  and  ( I  hope  )  Faith,  in  praying  for  my  felf, 
my  poor  Indiam^  and  dear  Friends  and  Acquaintance  in  NeW' 
England  and  elfevvhere,  and  for  the  dear  Interelt  of  Zzm  in 
general.  Bleji  the  Lord,  O  my  Souly  and  forget  not  all  hit 
Benefits, 

[  He  fpent  the  reft  of  this  Week,  or  at  leaft  the  moft  of  it, 
under  Deje^^ion  andMelancholy  :  Which  on  Friday  rofe  to  an 
cxtream  Heiglit  i  he  being  then,  as  he  himfelf  obferves,  much 
cxercifed  with  vapoury  Diforders.  This  exceedingGloominefs 
continued  on  Saturday,  'tiJI  the  Evening, when  he  was  again  re- 
lieved in  Family-Prayer  j  and  after  it,  was  refrefh'd  in  fecrer, 
and  felt  willing  to  live,  and  endure  Hardfhips  in  the  Caufe  of 
God  ;  and  found  his  Hopes  of  the  Advancement  of  Chrift's 
Kingdom,  as  alfo  his  Hopes  to  fee  the  Power  of  God  among  the 
poor  Indians^  confiderably  raifed.  ] 

Lord's-Day,  Feb.  3.  In  the  Morning,  I  was  fomewhat  re- 
lieved of  that  Gloom  and  Confufion,  that  my  Mind  has  of  late 
Icen  greatly  exercifed  with  :  Was  enabled  to  pray  with  fonic 
Compofure,  and  Comfort.  But  however,  went  to  my  Indians 
trembling  5  for  my  Soul  remembred  the  Wormwood  and  the  Gall 
(  I  might  almoft  fay  the  Hell )  of  Friday  laft  ;  and  I  was  greatly 
afraid  i  fhould  be  obliged  again  to  drink  of  thatCw/*  of  Tremblings 
"which  was  inconceivably  more  bitter  than  Death,  and  made  me 
long  for  the  Grave  more,  unfpeakably  more,  than  for  hid  Trea- 
sures, yea,  inconceivably  more  than  the  Men  of  this  World  long 
for  fuch  Treafures.  But  God  was  pleafed  to  hear  my  Cries, and 
to  afford  me  great  Affiftance  ;  fo  that  I  felt  Peace  in  my  own 
Soul  ;  and  was  fatisfied  that  if  not  one  of  the  Indians  fhould  be 
profited  by  my  Preaching, but  fhould  all  be  damned,  yet  I  fhould 
be  accepted  and  rewarded  as  faithful ;  for  I  am  perfwaded,  God 
enabled  me  to  be  fo.-—  Had  fome  good  Degree  of  Help  after- 
wards, at  another  Place  ;  and  much  longed  for  the  Converfion 
of  the  poor  Indians.  Was  fomewhat  refrefiied,  and  comfortable, 
it)wards  Night,  and  in  the  Evening.  O  that  my  Soul  might 
praife  the  Lord  for  his  GooJnefs.—  Enjoyed  romeFreedom,  in 
ihe  Evening,  in  Meditation  on  Luke  xiii.  24. 

[  In  the  three  next  Days,  he  was  the  Subject  of  much  De- 
;?6tion  :  But  the'  three  remaining  Days  of  the  Week  feem  to 
have  been  fpent  with  much  Compofure  and  Comfort.  On  the 
next  Sabbath,  i)c  prcach'd  at  Greenwich  m  Ncw-Jerfey.  In  the 
Evening,  he  lode  eight  Miles  to  vifit  a  fick  Man  at  the  Point  of 
Death,  ^nd  fgund  him  Spccchkfs  and  Scafelsfs.J 

Monday^ 


c/Mr.  David  Brainerd:     A,D.  1745."    145 

Monday,  Feb.  ir.  About  Break-of-Day,  the  fick  Man 
died.  I  was  affcded  at  the  Sight :  Spent  the  Morning  with  the 
Mourners  ;  and  after  Prayer,  and  fome  Difcourfe  with  them, 
I  returned  to  Greenwich, 2nd  preached  again  hem Pfal.  !xxxix  15. 
And  the  Lord  gave  me  AfHftance  :  1  felt  a  fweet  Love  to 
Souls,  and  to  the  Kingdom  of  Chrift  ;  and  longed  that  poor 
Sinners  might  J^now  the  joyful  Sound,  Several  Perfcns  were  much 
afFeded,  And  after  Meeting,  I  was  enabled  to  dircourfe,  with 
Freedom  and  Concern,  to  fome  Perfons  that  applied  to  me  under 
fpiritual  Trouble.  Left  the  Place,  fweetly  compofed,  and  rede 
home  tomyHcufe  about  8  Miles  difhnt.  Dircourfed  toFricn'ds, 
and  inculcated  divine  Truths  upon  fome.  Jn  the  Evening,  was 
in  the  moft  folemn  Fri:me  that  alnioft  ever  I  remember  to  have 
experienced:  1  know  not  that  ever*Death  appeared  more  real 
to  me,  or  that  ever  I  faw  my  felf  in  the  Condition  of  a  dead 
Corpfe,  laid  out, and  drefb'd  for  aLndging  in  the  filent  Grave,  fo 
evidently  as  at  thisTime.  And  yet  I  felt  exceeding  comfortably  : 
My  Mind  was  compofed  and  calm,  and  Death  appeared  with- 
out  a  Sting,  I  think,  J  never  felt  fuch  an  univerfal  Mortifica- 
tion to  all  created  Objects  as  nov/.  Oh,  hov*r  great  and  folemn 
a  Thing  it  appeared  to  die  !  Ob,  how  it  lays  the  greateflHonour 
in  the  Dufl !  And  Oh,  how  vain  and  trifling  did  the  Riches, 
Honours,  and  Pleafurcs  of  the  World  appear  !  I  could  not,! 
dare  not,  fomuc.h  as  think  of  any  of  them  ;  for  Death,  Death, 
folemn  (  tho'  not  frightful  )  Death  appeared  at  the  Door.  Oh, 
I  could  fee  my  felf  dead,  and  laid  out,  and  inclofed  in  myCoffin, 
and  put  down  into  the  cold  Grave,  with  greateft  Solemnity, but 
without  Terror  !  I  fpent  moft  of  the  Evening,  in  converfing 
with  a  dearChriftianFriend  :  And,ble(lcd  be  God, it  was  a  com- 
fortable Evening  to  us  both.—-  What  are  Friends?  What  are 
Comforts  ?  What  are  Sorrows  ?  What  are  DiftrefTes  ?---  The 
Time  isjhort :  Jt  remains^  that  they  which  we^p^be  as  tho^  they  wept 
not ;  and  they  which  rejoyce,  as  tha^  they  rejoyced  not :  for  the 
Faflnon  of  this  JVorld  pajfeth  azvay,  O  come.  Lord  J'ejus,  cewe 
quickly  ;  Amen.—  Blefled  be  God  for  the  Comforts  cf  the 
paft  Day. 

Tuefday,  Feb.  12.  V/as  exceeding  weak  ;  but  in  a  fweet 
rcfigned,  compofed  Frame,  moft  of  the  Day  :  Felt  my  Heart 
freely  go  forth  after  God  in  Prayer. 

Wednefday,  Feb,  13.  Was  much  exerclfed  with  vapoury 
Dlforders;  butflili  enabled  to  maintain  SolemnitVjand  I  think. 
Spirituality* 

V  2  Tuefday, 


U^      ^A27-^  ^^^   LIFE 

Thurfday,  Feb.  14.  Spent  the  Day  in  writing  on  a  divine 
Subjeft  :  Enjoy'd  Health,  and  Freedom  in  my  Work  :  Had  a 
folemn  SenTe  of  Death  ;  as  I  have  '  indeed  had  every  Day  this 
Week,  jn  Tome  Meafure  :  Whatl  felt  on  Monday  laft,  has 
been  abiding,  in  fome  confiderable  Degree,  ever  fince. 

Fiidav,  Feb,  15.  Was  engaged  in  writing  again  almoft  the 
whole  Day.  In  the  Evening,  was  much  affifted  in  meditating 
on  that  precious  Text,  John  vii.  37.  Jefusjiood  and  cried  &c, 
I  had  then  a  fw?;et  Senfe  of  the  free  Grace  of  the  Gofpel  :  My 
Soul  was  encouraged,  warm*d  and  quicken'd,  and  my  Defires 
drawn  out  after  God  in  Prayer  :  My  Soul  was  watchful,  and 
afraid  of  lofing  fo  fweet  a  Guefl  as  I  then  enlertain'd.  I  conti- 
r.ued  long  in  Prayer  and  Meditation,  intermixing  one  with  the 
other  ;  and  was  unwilling  to  be  diverted  by  any  Thing  at  all 
from  To  fweet  an  Exerc ife.  I  longed  to  proclaim  the  Grace  I 
then  meditated  upon,  to  the  World  of  Sinners.—-  O  how  quick 
and  powerful  is  the  IVord  of  the  ble/Ted  God  ! 

[  The  next  Day,  he  complains  of  great  Conflicts  with  Cor- 
ruption, and  much  Difcompofure  of  Mind,] 

Lord *s- Day, /^^^.  17.  Preached  to  the  tt^y{»;/^  People  (  my 
Interpreter  being  abfent )  in  the  Wildernefs  upon  the  funny  fide 
of  a  Hill:  Had  a  cofmderable  AfTembly,  confifting  of  People 
that  lived  (at  leatt  many  of  them)  not  lefs  than  30  Miles  afun- 
der  ;  fonic  of  them  came  near  20  Miles.  I  difcourfed  to  *em, 
all  Dav,  from  John  vii»  37.  Jefui  ftood  and  cried ^  /^>*^^»  ^f  ^f^i 
AIuu  ihhji.  Sec.  In  the  Afternoon,  it  pleafed  God  to  grant  me 
great  Freedj:n  and  Fervency  in  my  Difcourfe  ;  and  I  was  ena- 
bled to  imitate  the  Example  of  Chriftin  the  Textywhojhod  and 
cried."-  1  think,  I  was  fcar/:e  ever  enabled  to  ofier  the  free 
Grace  of  God  to  perifliing  Sinners  with  more  Freedom  anft 
Piainoefs  in  n>v'  Life.  And  afterwards,  I  was  enabled  earneftly 
to  invite  ihe  Children  of  God  to  come  renewedly,  and  drink  of 
ibis  Fountain  of  W'^ater  of  Life,  from  whence  they  have  here- 
tofore derived  unfpeukabie  Saiisfa6lion.  It  was  a  very  comfor- 
table 7'ime  to  me:  There  were  many  Tears  in  the  Aflembly  ; 
and  I  doubt  not  but  that  the  Spirit  of  God  was  there,  convincing 
poor  Sinners  of  their  need  of  Chrift.--- In  the  Evening,  I  felt 
compofed,  and  comror table,  tho*  much  tired  :  I  had  i^onie  fweet 
SenCe  of  the  Excellency  and  Glory  of  God  ;  and  my  Soul  re- 
joyced,  that  he  was  God  over  all,  bltjfed  forever  ;  but  was  too 
fciuzii    •"  -J-^]  fyjjii  Ccmpauy  and  Convcrfation,  and  longed 

10 


ef  Mr*  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1 745,     "J^^ 

to  be  more  alone  with  God.  Oh  that  I  could  forever  blefs  God 
for  the  Mercy  of  this  Dayj  who  anfwered  me  in  the  Joy  of  my 
Heart, 

[The  reft  of  this  Week  feems  to  have  been  fpent  under  a 
Decay  of  this  Life  and  Joy,  and  in  diitreffing  Conflidls  with 
Corruption  ;  but  not  without  fomc  Seafons  of  Refrefhment 
and  Comfort.] 

Lord's-Day,  Feb*  24.  In  the  Morning,  was  much  perplex'd  : 
My  Interpreter  being  abfent,  I   knev/  not  how  to  perform  my 
Work  among  the  Indians.  However,  f  rode  to  the  Indians^  got 
a  Dutch' Man  to  Interpret  for  me,  tho*  he   was  but  poorly  qua- 
lified for  the  Bufmefs.     Afterwards,  I  came  and   preach'd  to  a 
few  v/hite  People  from  Johnv],  67.    Here  the  Lord  feemed  to 
unburden  me  in  fome  Meafurc  ;  efpecially  towards  the  clofe  o{ 
my  Difcourfe  :  I  felt  Freedom  to  open  the  Love  of  Chriji  to  his 
own  dear  Difciples  :   When  the  reft  of  the  World  forfakes  him, 
and  zxcforfaken  by  him,   that  he  calls  them  no   more,  he  then 
turns  to  his  own,  and   fays,  Wtll  ye  alfogoaway  !  1  had  a  Senfe 
of  the  irtQ  Grace  of  Chrift  to  his  own  People,  in  fuch  Seafons 
of  general  Apoftacy,  and  when  they  themfelves  in  fome    Mea- 
sure backflide  with  the  World.     O  the  free  Grace   of   Chrift, 
that  he  feafonably   minds  his  People  of  their  Danger  of  Back- 
fliding^  and  invites  them  to  perfevere  in  their  Adherence  to  him- 
felf !   I  faw  that  hackfi'iding  Souls,  who  feemM  to  be  about  xogo 
away  with  the  World,  might  return,  and  welcome,  to  himz>2- 
mediately  ;  without  any  Thing  to  recommend  them  ;  notwith- 
ftandingall  their  formerBackHidings.  And  thus  myDifcourfe  was 
luited  to  my  own  Soul's  Cafe  :  For, of  late,  I  have  found  a  great 
want  of  this  Senfe  and  Apprehenfion  of  divineGtace  ;   and  have 
often  been  greatly  diftrefsM  in  my  own  Soul,  becaufe  I  did    not 
'Yuitably  apprehend  this  Fountain  opened  to  purge  away  Sin  ;  and  fo 
have  been  too  much  labouring  for  fpiritual  Life,  Peace  of  Ccn- 
fcience,  and  progreflive  Holincfs,  in  my  own  Strength  :   But 
now  God  (hewed  me,  fn  fome  Meafure,  the  Jrmof  z\\  Strength, 
and  the  Fountain  of  all  Grace.—-  In  the  Evening,  I  felt  folemn, 
devout,  and  fwcer,  refting  on  free  Grace  for  AiTiftanse,  Accep- 
tance, andPeace  of  Conlcience. 

[  Within  the  Space  of  the  next  nine  Days,  be  had  frequent 
refrsfhing,  invigorating  Influences  of  God's  Spirit ;  attended 
withComplaintof  Dulnefs,  and  withLongings  after  fpiritualLife 
a.p,(i  holy  Fervency.] 

WeJncfday^ 


T4S      2Ei.  if.  TSif  L  I  F  E 

Wednefday,  Afarch  6.  Spent  moft  of  the  Day  in  preparing 
for  a  Journey  to  New- England.  Spent  feme  Time  in  Prayer, 
with  a  rpecial  Reference  to  my  intended  Joiu-ney.  Was  afraid 
I  (hould  forfake  theFountain  of  livingfVater^^Sz  attempt  to  derive 
Satisfa6iion  from  brokenCiJIerm^my  dearFriends&Acquaintance, 
with  whom  I  might  meet  in  my  Journey.  1  look'd  to  God 
10  keep  me  from  iWuVanity  in  fpecialjas  weJl  as  others.  Towards 
Night,  and  in  the  Evening, was  vifited  by  feme  Friends,  fome  of 
whom,  I  trufl,  were  real  Chriftians  ;  who  difcovered  an  af- 
fc61ionate  Regard  to  me,  and  feem'd  grieved  that  1  was  about 
toieave  them  ;  efpecially  feeing  1  did  not  expert  to  make  any 
confiderable  Stay  among  them,  if  I  fhould  live  to  return  from 
New- England.  *  O  how  kind  has  God  been  to  me  !  How  has 
he  raifed  up  Friends  in  every  Place,  where  his  Providence  has 
called  me  !  Friends  are  a  great  Comfort ;  and  *tis  God  that 
gives  them  ;  't\s  he  makes  them  friendly  to  me.  Blefs  the  Lord^ 
O  my  Soul,  and  forget  not  all  his  Benefits, 

[  The  next  Dav,  he  fet  out  on  his  Journey  :  And  It  w^s 
about  five  Weeks  before  he  returned.---  The  fpecial  Defign  of 
this  Journey,  he  himfelf  declares  afterwards^  in  his  Diary  for 
March  21.  VVhere,  fpeaking  of  his  converfing  with  a  certain 
Minifter  in  New- England,  he  fays  thus.  Contrived  with  him  how 
to  raife  fome  Money  among  Ckriflian  Friends.,  in  order  to  fupport  a 
Colleague  with  me  in  the  fFildernefs^  (  1  having  mwf pent  twoTears 
in  avtry  folitary  Alanrnr^  that  we  might  he  together  ;  as  Chrijljent 
out  hisDifciples^  two  and  two  :  And  as  this  luas  the  principal  Con* 
cern  1  had  in  Fiew,  in  taking  this  yourney.,  fo  1  took  Pains  in  itj 
and  hope  God  will  fucceed  it^  if  for  his  Glory.  He  firft  went  into 
various  Parts  o(  Neiu-ferfey^^nd  vifited  feveralMinifters  there  : 
And  then  went  to  New-Tori:  ;  and  from  thence  into  New- Eng- 
land, goin^  to  various  Parts  of  ConneSticut  :  And  trhen  returned 
into  New- Jer fey  :  He  met  aNumber  of  Minifters  at  IVoodbridge^ 
ivho  (he  fays)  met  there  to  ccnfult  about  the  Affairs  of  Chrifi\  King- 
dom, in  fome  important  Articles.  He  fcems,  for  the  moft  Part,  to 
have  been  free  from  Melancholy  in  this  Journey  ;  and  many 
Times  to  have  had  extraordinary  Afliftance  in  publick  Miniftra- 
tions,  and  his  preaching  fometimes  attended  with  very  hopeful 


*  It  feems,  be  had  a  Defign,  bv  what  afterwards  appears, 
to  remove  and  live  among  tb(  Indians  at  Sufquahannah- 
River. 

Appcaf^ccs 


of  Mr.  David  Brainerd.     ^A.D.  1 745;       1 49 

Appearances  of  a  good  ElFed  on  the  Auditory.  He  alfo  had 
many  Seafons  of  fi^ecial  Comfort  and  fpiritual  Refrcihment,  in 
Converfation  with  Minlfters  and  other  Chriftian  Friends,  aruJ 
alfo  in  Meditation  and  Prayer  by  himfelf  alone,  j 

Saturday,  Jpril  13.  Rode  Home  to  my  ov/n  Houfe  at  the 
Forks  of  Delavjau  :  Was  enabled  to  remember  the  Goodnefs  of 
the  Lord, who  hasnowpreferved  me  while  riding  full  600  Miles 
in  this  Journey  5  has  kept  me  that  none  of  my  Bones  have  beea 
broken.  BJefl'ed  be  the  Lord,  who  has  preferved  me  in  this 
tedious  Journey,  and  returned  me  in  Safety  to  my  own  Houfe. 
Verily  'tis  God  that  has  upheld  me,  and  guarded  my  Goings. 

LordVDay,  April  14.  Was  difordered  in  Body  with  the 
Fatigues  of  my  late  Journey  5  but  was  enabled  however  to  preach 
to  a  confiderable  Aflbmbly  of  white  People,  gathered  from  all 
Par-ts  round  about,with  fome  Freedom,  from  E^ek.  xxxiii.  ii. 
As  1  live,  faith  the  Lord  God^  5cC.  had  much  moie  Ailiftance 
than  I  expected. 

[  This  Week,  he  went  a  Journey  to  PbiladMid,  in  order 
to  engage  the  GoverTjour  there  to  ufe  his  Intereft  with  the  Chief 
Man  of  the  Six  Nations,  (  with  whom  he  maintained  a  ftricS 
Friendfhip)that  he  would  give  himLcave  to  W'vq  ziSufquahannah^ 
and  inftruit  the  Indians  that  are  whhin  their  Territories.  *  in 
his  Way  to  and  from  thence,  he  lodged  with  Mr.  Beai^y  a 
young  Prefbyterian  Minifter.  He  fpeaks  of  Seafons  of  fweet 
fpiritual  Refrcfhaient,  that  he  enjoyed  at  his  Lodgings] 

Saturday,  April  20.  Rode  with  Mr.  Beaty  to  Abingion,  to 
attend  Mr.  Tnat^s  Adminiftration  of  the  Sacrament,  according 
to  the  Method  of  the  Church  of  Scotland.  When  we  arrived, 
we  found  Mv,Treat  preaching  ;  Afterwards  I  preach'd  aSermon 
from  Matih,  v.  3.  BUjfed  are  the  Poor  in  Spirit^  Sic.  God  was 
pleafed  to  give  me  great  Freedom  and  Tendernefs,  both  inPray- 
er  and  Sermon  .*  The  Aflembly  was  fweetly  melted,  and  Scores 


The  Indians  ztSufquahannah  are  a  mix'dCompany  of  many 
Nations,  fpeaking  various  Languages,  and  [ew  of  'em  pro-» 
perly  of  the  Six  Nations.  But  yet  the  Country  having 
formerly  been  conquered  by  the  Six  Nations^  thcv  claim 
the  Land  ;  and  ths  Sufquahannah- Indiar.s  are  a  kmd  of 
VailaJs  to  them, 

J  were 


,.f5<^    JEt.  28.  7^^  LIFE 

were  all  in  Tears.  It  was,  as  I  then  hoped  and  was  afterwards 
abundantly  fatisfied  by  converfing  with  them,  a  Jford  fpohn  in 
Seafon  to  many  weary  Souls*  I  was  extremely  tiredjand  my  Spi- 
rits much  exhaufted,  (o  that  I  could  fcarcely  fpeak  loudj  yet  I 
could  not  help  rejoicing  in  God. 

Lords-Day,  Jpril2i,  In  the  Morning,  was  calm  and  com- 
pofed^and  had  fome  out-goings  of  Soul  afterGod  in  fccretDutics^ 
and  longing  Defires  of  his  Prefence  in  the  SonSiuary  and  at  his 
Table  ;  that  his  Prefence  might  be  in  the  Aflembly  5  and  that 
his  Children  might  be  entertained  with  a  Fea/i  of  fat  Things,— - 
In  the  Forenoon,  Mr.  Treat  preach'd.  I  felt  fome  Affection  and 
Tendernefs  in  the  Seafon  of  theAdminiftration  of  theOrdinancc. 
Mr.  Seaty  preached  to  the  Multitude  abroad,  who  could  not 
half  havecrouded  into  the  Meeting- Houfe.  In  the  Seafon  of  the 
Communion,  I  had  comfortable  and  fweet  Apprehenfions  of  the 
blifsful  Communion  of  God's  People,  when  thev  fhall  meet  at 
their  Father's  Table  in  his  Kingdom,  in  a  Stale  of  Perfe6ticn.-» 
In  theAfternoon,  1  preach'd  abroad  to  the  whole  Afremb]y,froni 
Rev,  xiv.  4.  Thefe  are  they  that  follow  the  Lamb^  &c.  God  was 
pleafed  again  to  give  me  very  great  Freedom  and  Clearnefs,  but 
not  fo  much  Warmth  as  before.  However, there  was  a  mofl  a-* 
•mazing  Attention  in  the  whole  AfTembly  ;  and,  as  I  was  in- 
formed afterwards,   this  was  a  fweet  Seafon  to  many. 

Monday,  Jpr.  22.  I  enjoy 'd  fome  Swcetnefs  inRetirementj 
in  the  Morning.  At  eleven  o'Clock,  Mr.  Beaty  preach'd, with 
Freedom  and  Life.  Then  1  preach'd  from  'Jch.  vii.  37.  and 
concluded  the  Solemnity.  Had  fome  Freedom  ;  but  not  equal 
to  what  I  had  enjoyed  before  :  Yet  m  thePra^er,  the  Lord  ena- 
bled me  to  cry  (  I  hope)  with  a  Child-like  Temper,  withTcn- 
dernefsand  Brokennefs  of  Heart.---  CameHome  with  Mr. Seat) 
to  his  Lodgings ;  and  fpent  the  Time,  while  riding,  and  after- 
wards, very  agreably  on  divine  Things. 

Tuefday,  Jprjl2^.  Left  Mr.  Seaty's,  and  returnedHomc  to 
thcForks  of  Delaware  :  Enjoyed  fome  fweet  Meditations,  on 
the  Road,  and  was  enabled  to  Hft  up  my  Heart  to  God  inPrayer 
and  Praife. 

[  The  two  ne<t  Days,  he  fpeaks  of  much  bodily  DifordcFj 
but  of  fome  Degrees  of  fpiritual  Afliflancc  and  Freedom,  j 

Friday,  Jpril  26.  Converfed   with  a  Chriftian  Friend   with 
fomevVarmth  ;  and  felt  a  Spirit  of  Mortification  to  theWorldj 
in  a  very  great  Degree.     Afterwards,  was  enabled  to  pray  fer- 
vently 


of  Mr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1745.     15  f 

tently,  and  to  rely  on  God  fweetly,  for  all  Things  pertaining  i3 
Life  and  Godlinefs.  Juft  in  the  Evening,  was  vifited  by  a  dear 
Chriftian  Friend,  with  whom  I  fpent  an  Hour  or  two  in  Con- 
verfation,  on  the  very  Soul  of  Religion.  There  are  many  with 
whom  I  can  talk  about  Religion  :  But  alas,  1  find  few  with  whom 
I  can  talk  Religion  it  f elf  :  But,  blefled  be  the  Lord,  there  are 
fome  that  love  to  feed  on  the  Kernel,  rather  than  the  Shell. 

[  The  next  Day,  he  went  to  the  Iri/h  Settlement,  often  be- 
fore mentioned,  about  15  Miles  diftant  ;  where  hie  fpent  the 
Sabbath,  and  preached  with  fome  confiderable  AiTiftance.  On 
Monday,he  returnedjin  a  very  weakState^to  his  ownLodgings.l 

Tuefday,  Jpril  30.  Was  fcarce  able  to  walk  about,  and  was 
obliged  to  betake  my  felf  to  the  Bed,  much  of  the  Day  ;  and 
fpent  away  the  Time  in  a  very  folitary  Manner  ;  being  neither 
able  to  read,  meditate,  nor  pray,  and  had  none  to  converfc 
with  in  that  Wildernefs.  Oh,  how  heavily  does  Time  pafs 
away,  when  I  can  do  nothing  to  any  good  Purpofe  ;  but  feem 
obliged  to  trifle  away  precious  Time  !  But  of  late,  I  have  feen 
it  my  Duty  to  divert  my  fe!f  by  all  lawful  Means,  that  I  may  be 
fit,  at  leaft  feme  fmall  Part  of  my  Time,  to  labour  for  God^ 
And  here  is  the  Difference  between  my  prefent  Divcrflons,  and 
thofe  1  once  purfued,  when  in  a  natural  State.  Then  I 
made  a  god  of  Diverfions,  delighted  in  them  with  a  Negle6t  of 
God,  and  drew  my  higheft  Satisfadion  from  them  :  Now  I  ufc 
them  as  Means  to  help  me  in  living  to  God  ;  fixedly  delighting 
in  Him,  and  not  in  them,  drawing  my  higheft  Sitisfa(5lion  from 
Him,  Then  they  were  my  All ;  now  they  are  only  Means 
leading  to  my  All,  And  thofe  Things  that  are  the  greateft  Di- 
verfion,  when  purfued  with  this  View,  don't  tend  to  hinder,but 
promote  my  Spirituality  ;  and  1  fee  now,  more  than  ever,  that 
they  are  abfolutely  neceflary. 

V/ednefday,  iWfl)^  i.  Was  not  able  to  fit  up  more  than  half 
the  Day  ;  and  yet  had  fucb-  Recruits  of  Strength  fometimes, 
that  I  was  able  to  write  a  little  on  a  divine  Subjed.  Was 
grieved  that  I  could  no  more  live  to  God.  In  the  Evening,^ 
had  fome  Sweetnefs  and  Intenfenefs  in  fecrct  Prayer. 

Thurfday,  May  2.  In  the  Evening,  being  a  little  better  in 
Health,  I  walk'd  into  the  Woods,  and  enjoyed  a  fweet  Seafon 
ef  Meditation  and  Prayer.  MyThoughts  run  uponP/a/.xvii.i5. 
IJhall  befatiifiedy  when  I  awake  with  thy  Likenefs,  And  it  was 
indssd  a  preciousText  \q  me.  I  longM  to  preach  to  the  whole 
'  X         '  World; 


152     JTJ,  28.  t;^^  LIFE    - 

World  :  And  it  feem'd  to  me,  they  muft  needs  all  be  melted 
in  hearing  fuch  precious  divineTruths, as  I  had  then  aView  and 
Relifh  of.  MyThoughts  were  exceeding  clearjand  my  Soul  was 
refrefhed. ---BlefTed  be  the  Lord,  that  in  my  late  5c  prefent 
Weaknefs,  now  for  many  Days  together,  my  Mind  is  not  gloo- 
my, as  at  fome  other  Times. 

Friday,  May  3.  Felt  a  little  Vigour  of  Body  and  Mind,  in 
the  Morning :  Had  fome  Freedom,  Strength,  and  Sweetnefs 
in  Prayer.  Rode  to  and  fpent  fome  Time  with  my  Indians. 
In  the  Evenings  again  retiring  into  the  Woods,  I  enjoyed  fome 
fweet  Meditations  on  Ifaiah  liii.  i.  Tet  it  pkafed  the  Lord  to 
Iruije  him.  Sic 

[  The  three  nextDays  were  fpent  in  much  weaknefs  of  Body  : 
But  yet  he  enjoyed  fomeAfliftance  in  publick  and  privateDuties : 
and  feems  to  have  remained  free  from  Melancholy.] 

Tuefday,  Afay  7.  Spent  the  Day  mainly  in  making  Prepa- 
ration for  a  Journey  into  the  Wildernefs.  Was  flill  weak,  and 
concerned  howl  fhould  perform  (o  difHculta  Journey.  Spent 
fome  Tim.e  in  Prayer  for  the  divine  BleHing,  Diredtion  and 
Protection  in  my  intended  Journey  ;  but  wanted  bodily  Strength 
to  fpend  the  Day  in  Fafting  and  Prayer. 

[The  next  Day,  he  fet  out  on  his  Journey  to  Sufquahannah^ 
with  his  Interpreter.  He  endured  great  Hardlhips  &  Fatigues 
in  his  Way  thither  thro'  a  hideous  Wildernefs  ;  where,  after 
having  lodg'd  one  Night  in  the  open  Woods,  he  was  overtaken 
with  a  North- Eaflerly  Storm,  in  which  he  was  almoft  ready  to 
perifh.  Having  no  Manner  of  Shelter,  and  not  being  able  to 
make  a  Fire  in  fo  great  a  Rain,  he  could  have  no  Comfort  if  ho 
ftopt  ;  therefore  determined  to  go  forward,  in  Hopes  of  meeting 
with  fomeShelter,  without  which  he  tho't  it  impcflible  he  fhould 
live  theNight  thro* :  But  theirHorfes  hap'ning  to  have  eatPoifon 
(for  want  of  otherFood)  at  a  Place  where  they  lodged  the  Night 
before, were  {^  fick  that  they  could  neither  ride  nor  lead  'em, but 
were  obliged  to  drive  *em  before  them>and  travel  onFoot ;  until 
thro*  theMercy  of  God  (juft  aiDufk)they  came  to  aBark-Huttj 
where  they  lodged  thatNight.  After  he  came  ioSufquahannak^hQ 
frave!1cd  about  theLength  of  an  lOoMiles  on  theRiver,&  vifited 
irj:\r.y'Fowfi5  Iz  Settlement^}  of  xhtlndlans ;  faw  feme  of  7  or  8 
diltin6l  Tribes  ;  and  preached  to  difFerentNations,  by  different 
Interpeterj.  f  Ic  v/as  fometimes  much  difcouraged,  and  funk 
.";  ^"  - '     ■     •  ?  •   '  the  OppoAiion  that  appeared  in  the  Indians 

tQ 


i?/ Mr,  D&vid  Bralnerd.      A.D.  1745.     "153 

to  Chriftlanity.     At  other  Times,   he  was  encouraged  by  the 
Difpofition  that  fome  of  thefe   People  manifefted   to  hear,  and 
Williiignefs  to  be  inftruded.     He  here  met  with  fome  that  had 
formerly  been  his  Hearers  at  Kaunaumeek^  and  had  removed  hi- 
ther \  who  faw  and  heard  him  again  with  great  Joy.     He  fpent 
a  Fortnight  among  the  Indians  on  this  River  ;     and  pafs'd  thro* 
confiderable  Labours  and  Hardfhips,  frequently  lodging  on  the 
Ground,  and  fometimes  in  the  open  Air  ;   And  at  length  he  fell 
extremely  111,  as  he  was  Riding  in  the  Wildernefs,  being  feized 
with  anAgue,  followed  with  a  burning  Feyer,and  extremePains 
in  his  Head  and  Bowels,  attended  with   a  great  Evacuation  of 
Blood  ;  {0  that  he  tho't  hemuft  have  periflied  in  the  Wildernefs; 
But  at  iafl  coming  to  an  Indian  Trader's  Hutt,  he  got  Leave  to 
ftay  there  ;  and  tho'  without  Phyfick  or  Food  proper  for  him,  it 
pleafed  God, after  about  aWeek's  Diftrefs,  to  relieve  him  (o  far 
that  he  was  able   to  ride.     He  returned  homewards  from  Jun- 
cauta^   an  Ifland  far  down  the  River  \  where  was  a  confiderabie 
Number  of  Indians,  who  appeared  more  free  from  Prejudices  a- 
gainft  Chriftianityjthan  molt  of  the  other  Indians*  He  arrived  at 
theForks  of  Delaware  on  Thurfday^^jy  30, after  having  rode  ia 
this  Journey  about  34oMiles.  f    He  cameHome  in  a  very  w^ak 
State, &  underDejecSlion  of  Mind  ;  which  was  a  greatHindrance 
to  him  in  religious  Exercifes.     However,  on  the  Sabbath,  after 
having  preach'd  to  the  Indians,  he  preach'd  to  the  ivhife  People, 
wirh  fome  Succefs,  from  I/ai,  liii.  10.   Tet  itpkajedthe  Lord  to 
hruife  him,  &c.     fome  being  awakened  by  his  preaching.     The 
next  Day,  he  was  much  exercifed  for   want  of  fpiritual  Life 
and  Fervency.]  • 

Tuefday,  June  4.  Towards  Evening,  was  in  DIftrefs  for 
God's  Prefence  and  a  Senfe  of  divine  Things :  Withdrew  my 
felf  to  the  Woods,  and  fpent  near  an  Hour  in  Prayer  and  Me- 
ditation ;  and  I  think,  the  Lord  had  CompalTion  on  me,  and 
gave  mc  fome  Senfe  of  divine  Things  ;  which  was  indeed  re- 
frefhing  &  quick'ning  to  me  :  MySoul  enjoyed  Intenfenefs  2nd 
Freedom  in  Prayer,  fo  that  it  griev'd  me  to  leave  the  Place. 

Wednefday,  June  5.  Felt  thirfling  Defires  after  God,  in 
the  Morning.  In  the  Evening,enjoyed  a  precious  Seafon  ofRe- 
tirement  :  Was  favoured  with  fome  clear  and  fweetMeditation» 
upon  a  facred  Text ;  DivineThings  open'd  with  Clearnefs  and 


+  This  is  the  Journey  which  he  occafiQaally  mentions  in  his 
printed  Journal^  Pag.  S^-^"^^* 

X  2  Certainty 


154    ^/^/.  28.  fre^LIFE 

Certainty,  and  had  a  divine  Stamp  upon  them  f  My  Soul  was 
alfo  enlarged  and  refrefli'd  inPrayer  ;  and  I  delighted  to  continue 
jn  the  Duty  ;  and  was  fweetly  affifted  in  praying  for  Fellow- 
Chriftians,  and  my  dear  Brethren  in  the  Miniftry.  Bleffedbc 
the  dear  Lord  for  fuch  Enjoyments.  O  how  fweet  &  precious 
it  is,  to  have  a  clear  Apprehenfion  &  t^derSenfe  of  the  Myflery 
cf  Godlimfsy  of  true  Holinefs,  &  Likenefs  to  the  beft  of  Beings  ! 
O  what  a  Bleflednefs  it  is,  to  be  as  much  like  God,  as  'tis  poffi- 
ble  for  a  Creature  to  be  like  his  great  Creator  !  Lord,  give  me 
more  of /^y  Likenefs  :  I  {hall  be  fatisfed,  when  I  awake  with  it. 
Thurfday,  June  6.  Was  engaged,  a  confiderable  Part  of  the 
Day,  in  Meditation  and  Study  on  divine  Subjedls.  Enjoyed 
fome  fpecial  Freedom,  Clearnefs,  and  Sweetnefs  in  Meditation. 
O  how  refrefhing  it  is,  to  be  enabled  to  improve  Time  well  ! 

[  The  next  Day,  hje  went  a  Journey  of  near  fifty  Miles  to 
2<lefhamingy  to  affift  at  a  Sacramental  Occafion,  to  be  attended  at 
Mr.  Beaty's  Meeting-Houfe  i  being  invited  thither  by  him  and 
his  People.  ] 

Saturday,  June  8-  Was  exceeding  weak  and  fatigued  with 
Riding  in  the  Heat  Yefterday  :  But  being  defired,  1  preached  in 
the  Afternoon,  to  a  crouded  Audience,  from  Ifai,  xl.  i.  Comfort 
yey  Comfort  ye  my  People,  faith  your  God.  God  was  pleafed  to 
give  me  great  Freedom,  in  opening  the  Sorrows  of  God's  Peo- 
ple, and  in  fetting  before  them  comfortingConfiderations.  And, 
blefTed  be  the  Lord,  it  was  a  fweet  melting  Seafon  in  the  Aflem- 
bjy. 

Lord's- Day,  June  g.  Felt  fome  longing  Defires  of  the  Pre- 
fence  of  God  to  be  with  his  People  on  the  folemnOccafion  of  the 
Dav.  In  the  Forenoon,  Br.  Beaiy  preached  ;  and  there  appear- 
ed fome  Warmth  in  the  AfTcmbly.  Afterwards,  I  afTifted  in  the 
Adminiftration  of  the  Lord's  Supper  :  And  towards  the  clofe  of 
it,  I  difcourfed  to  the  Multitude  extempore,  with  fomeReference 
to  that  facred  PafTage  Jfai.  liii.  lO-  Fet  it  pleafed  theLord  to  bruife 
Him.  Here  God  gave  me  great  Afliftance  in  addreflingJ^inners  : 
And  theWord  was  attended  with  amazingPower  ;  manyScores, 
if  not  Hundreds,  in  that  great  AfTembly,  confifting  of  three  or 
four  Thoufand,  were  much  afFecled  ;  fo  that  there   was  a  very 

great  Alourning,   like   the  Adcurning    of  Hadadrimmon. In 

the  Evening,  I  could  hardly  look  any  Body  in  the  Face,  be- 
caufe  of  the  f mp? rfe^ions  I  faw  in  my  Performances  in  the 
Day  paft. 

Mondajj 


9f  Mr,  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1 745:      '155 

Monc^ay  Juneio.  PreacbM  with  a  good  Degree  of  Clearnefs 
snd  feme  fweet  Warmth,  from  Pfal.  xvii  ,5^  7/7.^//  befath^ 
fled  when  1  awake  with  thy  Ltkenefs,  And  blefled  beGod  there 
was  aKreatSoIemnity,and  Attention  in  the  AfTembly,  and  Tweet 
Refrcftimcnt  among  God's  People  ;  as  was    evident  then,  and 

afterwards.  ^  .  ,    •    r^  r  .• 

Tuefday  June  11.  Spent  the  Day  mamly  in  Converfauon 
with  dear  Chriftian  Friends  ;  and  enjoyed  fome  fweet  Senfeo^ 
divine  Things.  O  hovir  deflrable  it  is,  to  keep  Company  with 
God's  dear  Children  !  Thefe  are  the  excellent  Ones  of  the  Earth 
h  whom.  I  czn  truly  fay,  is  all  my  Delight,  O  what  Dehght 
will  it  afford,  to  meet  them  all  in  a  State  of  Perfedion  !  Lord, 
prepare  mc  for  that  Mate.  ,^  . ,    »      . 

[The  next  Day,  he  left  Mr.i5/^//s,and  went  to  Maidenhead 
in  Newjerfey,  and  fpent  the  next  feven  Days  m  a  com- 
fortable State  of  Mind,  vifiting  feveral  Minifters  in  thofe  Parts.] 
Tuefday,  June  18.  Set  out  from  Ncw-Brunfwick  with  a 
Defian  to  vifit  fome  Indians  zt  a  Place  called  Crofweekjungia 
New'Jerfey,  towards  the  Sea.  \  In  the  Afternoon,  came  to  a 
Place  called  Cranberry^  and  meeting  with  a  ferious  Minifter, 
Mr.  Mc  Night,  I  lodged  there  with  him.  Had  fome  Enlarge- 
ment and  Freedom  in  Prayer  with  a  Number  of  People. 


t  Mr.  Brainerd  having,  when  at  Bo/ion,   wrote  and  left  with 
a  Friend  a  brief  Relation  of  Fads  touching  hisLabours  with 

•  the  Indians  znd  Reception  among  them,  during  the  Space 
of  Time  between  Nov.  5.  1744^  ^nd  Ju^e  19.  1745. (wuh 
a  View  to  connea  his  Narrative,  at  the  End  of  Mr.  Pern- 
berton's  Ordination-Sermon,  and  his  Journal,  in  Cafe  they 
fhouldever  be  reprinted)  concludes  the  fame  with  this 
FafTage  :  Js  my  Body  was  very  feeble,  Jo  my  Mind  was  fear  ce 
ever  jo  much  damp'd  and  difcourag'd  about  the  Converfion  of 
the  Indians,  as  at  this  Time,  .  And  in  this  State  of  Body  and, 
Mind  1  made  my  firji  Vifit  to  the  Indians  in  New- Jerfey, 
where  Godwas  pleased  to  difplay  his  Power  ^  Grace  m  the 
remarkable  Manner  that  1  have  reprefenied  in  my  printed 
JournaL 


^wm^^^^^m^^n%^ 


PART 


1^6     JEliS.  Tie  life 

Part     VIL 

Fro7n  his  frji  Begimiing  to  preach  to   the, 
Indians  at  Crofweekfung,   '////  he  r^- 
tur?id  from  his  laji  yourney  to  Sufqua- 
liannah  ///  with  the  Confuhtption^  whereof 
he  died. 


r  IT  7  E  are  now  come  to  that  Part  of  Mr.  Bratnerd's  Li7e, 
|_  VV  wherein  he  had  his  greateft  Succefs^  in  his  Labours  for 
the  good  of  Souls,  and  in  his  particular  Bufinefs  as  a 
MifTionary  to  the  Indians,  An  Account  of  which,  if  here  pub- 
]i{h*d,  would  doubtlefs  be  very  fntertainlng  to  the  Reader,  after 
he  hasfeen  by  the  preceeding  Parts  of  this  Account  of  his  Life, 
how  great  and  long-continued  his  Defires  for  the  fpiritual  Good 
of  this  Sort  of  People  were, how  he  prayed, labouredj^c  wreftjed, 
and  how  much  he  denied  himfelf  and  iufFered,to  this  End.  After 
all  Mr.  Brai'nerd's  agonizing  in  Prayer,  and  travailing  in  Bij^h; 
for  the  Converfion  of  Indians,  and  all  the  Interchanges  or  his 
raifcd  Hopes  and  Expectations,  and  then  Difappointments  ^nd 
Difcouragcments  ;  and  after  waiting  in  a  Way  of  perfevering 
Prayer,  Labour  and  Suffering,  as  it  were  through  a  \ongNight  ; 
at  length  the  Day  dawns :  (Veeplng  continues  for  a  Night  j  but  Joy 
comes  in  the  Morning,  He  went  forth  weepings  hearing  precious 
Seed,  and  now  he  comes  with  Rejoycing,  bringing  his  Sheaves 
with  him.  The  defircd  Invent  is  bro'c  to  pafs  at  laft  ;  but  at  a 
Time, in  a  Place, arKl  uponSubje<9s,that  fcarce  ever  entered  into 
bis  Heart.  An  Account  of  this  would  undoubtedly  now  much 
gratify  the  Chriflian  Reader :  And  it  fliould  have  been  here  in- 
ferted,  as  it  ftands  in  his  Diary,  had  it  not  been,  that  a  particu- 
lar Account  of  this  glorious  and  wonderful  Succefs  was  drawn 
up  bv  Mr.  Brainerd  h'lmkU,  purfuant  to  the  Order  of  the  ho- 
nourable Society  in  Scotland,  and  publifh'd  by  him  in  his  Llfe- 
fime  ',  which  Account  many  have  in  their  Hands  y  and  the  in- 

fercing 


of  Mr.  David  Bralnerd.       A.D.  1 745.     157 

fertlng  it  here  would  too  much  fwell  this  Book,  as  was  faid 
before  in  the  Preface.  However,  1  look  upon  the  want  of  this 
Account  here,  as  a  real  Defe6l  in  this  Hiftory  of  Mr.  BrainercTs 
Life  ;  which,  I  would  hopejjrtiofe  of  my  Readers,  who  are  not 
already  poflefs'd  of  his  publick  Journal,  will  fupply,  by  procur- 
ing one  of  thofe  Books,  that  they  mayn't  be  without  that  which 
in  feme  Refpe^ts  is  the  molt  remarkable,  and  to  a  Chriftian 
Mind  would  be  the  moft  pleafantPart  of  the  wholeStory.  That 
theReader  who  is  furnifh'd  with  one  of  thofe  Books, may  know 
the  Placg  where  the  Defeats  of  thisHiftory  are  to  be  fupplied  from 
thence,    I  fhall  either  exprefly  obferve  it  as  I  go  along,  or  elfe 

make  a  dafh  or  ftroke  thus Which  when  the  Reader  finds 

in  this  7th  Part  of  this  Hiftory, he  is  to  underftand  by  it,  that  in 
that  Place  fomething  in  Mr.  Brainerd's  Diary,yf/or\.\\  obferving, 
is  left  out,  becaufe  the  fame  for  Subftance  was  publifhed  before 
in  his  printed  yournal.^  ♦ 

Wednefdajr  June  19.  1745.  Rode  to  the  Indians  at  Crofweeh" 
fung  :  Found  few  at  Home  :  Difcourfed  to  them  however  ;  and 
obferved  them  very  ferious  and  attentive.  At  Night  I  was  ex- 
treamly  worn  out,  and  fcarce  able  to  walk  or  fit  up.  Oh,  how 
tirefome  is  Earth  !    How  dull  the  Body  ! 

Thurfday,  yune  20.  Towards  Night,  preach'd  to  the  Indians 
again  ;  and  had  more  Hearers  than  before.  In  the  Evening, 
enjoy 'dforae  Peace  and  Serenity  of  Mind,  fomeCompofure  and 
Comfort  in  Prayer  alone;  and  was  enabled  to  lift  up  my  Head 
with  fome  Degree  of  Joy,  under  an  Apprehenfioa  that  my  Re- 
demption draws  nigh.  Oh,  blefTed  be  God,  that  there  remains 
a  R^ft  to  his  poor  weary  People  ! 

Friday,  yune  21.  Rode  ioFreehold^Xok^MrMWamTinnent-^ 
and  fpcnt  the  Day  comfortably  with  him.  My  finking  Spirits 
were  a  little  raifed  and  encouraged  ;  and  I  felt  my  Soul  breath- 
ing after  God,  in  the  midftof  Chriftian  Converfation.  And  in 
the  Evening,was  r^frefh'd  in  fecret  Prayer  :  Saw  my  felf  a  poor 
worthlefs  Creature,  without  Wifdom  to  direft,  or  Strength  td 
help  my  felf.  Oh,  blefled  be  God,  that  lavs  me  under  a  happy, 
a  blefled  Neceflity  of  living  upon  himfelf  ! 

Saturday,  June  22.  About  Noon, rode  to  the  Indians  again  ; 
and  ncarNight.preach'd  to  'em.  Found  nivBody  much  ftrength- 
en'd,and  was  enabled  tofpeak  with  abundantPlainnefs^  Warmth. 
And  the  Power  of  God  evidently  attended  thz  Word  ;  fcj  that 
fundry  Perfons  were  brought  under  greatConcern  for  theirSou!s» 
2nd  made  to  Ihed  many  Tears,  and  to  vvifti  for  Chrift  to  (livc 

them* 


158    ^/.  28:  lie  LIFE 

them.  My  Soul  was  much  refre{h'd,and  quicken*d  in  my  Work; 
and  1  could  not  but  fpend  much  Time  with  them,  in  order  to 
cpen  both  their  Mifery  and  Remedy.  This  was  indeed  a  fweet. 
Afternoon  to  me.  While  ridfng,  before  I  came  to  the  Indians^ 
my  Spirits  were  refrcfti'd,  and  my  Soul  enabled  to  cry  to  God 
almoift  incefianrly,  for  many  Miles  together.  In  the  Evening 
alfo  I  found  the  Confolations  ofGod  were  not  fmall :  1  was  then 
willing  to  live,  and  infome  Refpec^s  defirous  of  it,  that  I  might 
do  fomething  for  the  dear  Kingdom  of  Chrift  ;  and  yet  Death 
appeared  pleafant :  So  that  I  was  in  fome  Meafure  in  a  Strait 
between  two, having  a  defire  to  depart.  I  am  often  weary  of 
this  World,  and  want  to  leave  it  on  that  Account :  But  'tis 
defirsbi'e  to  be  drawn,  rather  than  driven  out  of  it. 

[  In  the  four  next  Da>s  is  nothing  remarkable  in  his  Diary, 
-||ut  what  is  in  his  pubiick  Journal.  ] 

Thurfday,  J^;;^  27. MySoul  rejoiced, to  find,thatGod  ena- 
bled me  to  be  faithful,  and  that  he  was  pleafed  to  awaken  ihefe 
poor  Indians  by  my  Means.  O  how  Heart-reviving,  and  Soul- 
lefiefhing  is  it  to  me  to  fee  the  Frtiit  of  my  Labours  ! 

Friday,  yz^w^  28. In  theEvening,mySoul  was  revived, and 

my  Heart  hfted  up  to  God  in  Prayer,  for  my  poor  Indians^  my 
Self  and  Friends,  and  the  dear  Church  of  God.  And  O  how  re- 
freftiing,  how  fweet  was  this  !  Blefs  the  Lord,  O  my  Soul,  and 
forget  not  his  Goodnefs  and  tender  Mercy. 

Saturday,  June2<^.  PreachM  twice  to  the  Indiam  ;  and  could 
not  but  wonder  at  their  Serioufnefs,  and  the  Stridtnefs  of  their 

Attention BlefTed  be  God,  that  has  inclined    their  Hearts 

to  hear.  And  O  how  refrefhing  it  is  to  me,  to  fee  them  attend 
withfuch  uncommon  Diligence  and  AfFe<5lion,  with  Tears  in 
their  Eyes,  and  Concern  in  their  Hearts  I  In  thcEvening, could 
not  but  lift  up  my  Heart  to  God  in  Prayer,  while  riding  to  my 
Lodgings :  And  bleffed  be  his  Name,  had  AfTiftance  and  Free- 
dom.    O  how  much  better  than  Life  is  the  Prefence  ai  God  I 

[  }^\%  Diary  gives  an  Account  of  nothing  remarkable  on  the 
two  next  Days,  befides  what  is  in  his  pubiick  Journal  ;  except- 
inghis  Heart's  being  lifted  up  with  Thanktulnefs,  rejoicing  ixi 
God,  &c.-\ 

Tue(day,yu/),'  2.  Rode  from  thQ Indians  ioBrunfwick,  near  40 
Miles,  and  lodged  there.  Felt  my  Heart  drawn  out  after  God 
m  Prayer,  ^Jmtit  ajl  the  Forenoon  ;  cfpecialjy  while  riding. 

An4 


(P/ Mr.  David  Braiflcrd;        A.D.1745;    159 

And  in  the  Evening,  could  not  help  crying  to  God  for  tbofc 
poor  Indiam  ;  and  after  I  went  to  Bed,  my  Heart  continued  to 
go  out  to  God  for  them/till  I  dropM  afleep.  O  blefled  be  God 
that  I  may  pray  ! 

[  He  was  fo  beat  out  by  conftafit  preaching  to  thefe  Indians, 
yielding  to  their  earneft  and  importunate  Defires,  that  he  found 
it  necefTary  to  give  himfelf  fome  Relaxation.  He  fpent  therefore 
about  a  Week  in  New-yerfey^ziitt  he  left  thefe  Indians^  vifiting 
feveralMinifters,  and  performing  fome  neceflary  Bufinefs,before 
he  went  to  the  Forks  of  Delaware,  And  the*  he  was  very  weak 
inBody,  yet  he  feems  to  have  been  ftrongin  Spirit.  OnFriday, 
July  12.  he  arrived  at  his  own]Houfe  in  theForks  of  Delaware  ; 
continuing  ftill  free  from  Melancholy  ;  from  Day  to  Day,  en- 
joying Freedom,  Afliftance  and  Refrefhment  in  the  inner  Man. 
But  on  Wednefday,  the  next  Week,  he  feems  to  have  had  fome 
melancholy  Thoughts  about  his  doing  fo  little  for  God  j  being 
(o  nJuch  hindered  by  weaknefsof  Body.] 

^Thurfday,  July  18.  Longed  to  fpend  the  little  Iilch  of  Time 
I  have  in  the  World  more  for  God.  Felt  a  Spirit  of  Seriouf"' 
nefs,  TendernefsjSweetnefs,  and  Devotion^  and  wifh'd  to  fpcnd 
the  whole  Night  in  Prayer  and  Communion  with  God. 

Friday,  July  19.  In  the  Evening,  walked  abroad  for  Prayer 
and  Meditation,  and  enjoyed  Compofure  and  Freedom  in'  thefe 
fweet  Exercifes ;  efpecially  in  Meditation  on  Rev.  iii.  12.  Him 
that  overcomeih^will  I  make  a  Pillar  in  the  Temple  of  my  God  Sec, 
This  was  then  a  delightful  Theme  to  me,  and  it  refrefhed  my 
Soul  to  dwell  upon  it.  Oh,  when  {hall  I  go  no  more  out  from 
the  Service  and  Enjoyment  of  the  dear  Lord  ?  Lord,  haften 
the  blefTed  Day. 

[  Within  the  Space  of  the  next  fix  Days,  he  fpeaks  of  much 
inward  Refrefhment  and  Enlargement,  from  Time  to  Time.] 

Friday,  July  26.  In  the  Evening,  God  was  pleafed  to  help 
me  in  Prayer,  beyond  what  I  have  experienced  for  fome  Time  ; 
efpecially  my  Soul  was  drawn  out  for  theEnlargement  of  Chrilt's 
Kingdom,  and  for  the  Converfion  of  my  poor  People  :  and  my 
Soul  relied  on  God  for  the  Accomplifhment  of  that  great  Work. 
Oh, how  fweet  were  theThoughts  of  Death  to  me  at  thisTime  ! 
Oh,  how  I  longed  to  be  with  Chrift,  to  be  imployed  in  the  glo- 
rious W^rk  of  Angels,  and  with  an  Angel's  Freedom,  Vigour 

Y  and 


i6o    ^/.  2S.  ne  LIFE 

and  Delight !  And  yet  how  willing  was  I  fo  ftay  a  while  on 
Earih,  that  [  might  do  fonneihing,  if  the  Lord  pleafed,  for  his 
Intereft  in  the  World  !  My  Soul,  my  very  Soul,  longed  for  the 
Ingathering  of  the  poor  Heafhen  ;  and  I  cried  to  God  (or  them 
moft  willingly  and  heartily  ;  and  yet  becaufe  1  could  not  but  cry. 
This  was  a  fweetSeafon  ;  for  1  had  fome  livelyTaf^e  of  Heaven, 
and  a  Temper  of  Mind  fuited  in  Tome  Mcafure  to  the  Employ- 
ments and  Entertainments  of  it.  My  Soul  was  grieved  to  leave 
the  Place  ;  but  my  Body  was  weak  and  worn  out,  and  it  was 
near  nine  o'clock.  Oh,  I  longed  that  the  remaining  Part  of 
mvLife  migJ^t  be  fiird  up  with  moreFervcncy  and  Activity  in  the 
Things  of  God  I  Oh  the  inwardPeace^Compofure,  andGod-like 
Serenity  of  fuch  aFrame  !  Heaven  muft  needs  differ  from  thisonly 
in  Degree,and  not  inKind.  Lord^ever  give  me  this  Sread  of  Life* 
[  Much  of  this  Frame  feem'd  to  continue  the  next  Day.] 
Lofii's-Day,  Juiy  28.  In  the  Evening,  my  Soul  was  melted, 
and  my  Heart  broken,  with  aSenfeof  paft  Barrennefsand  Dead- 
nefs  :  And  Ob,  how  I  then  longed  to  live  to  God,  and  bring 
forth  much  Fruit  to  his  Glory  ! 

Monday,  July  29.  Was  much  exercifed  with  a  Senfe  of 
Vilcnefs,  with  Guilt  and  Shame  before  God. 

[  For  other  Things  remarkable,  while  he  was  this  Time  at 
the  Forks  oi  Delaware ^t.ht  Reader'muft  be  refer*d  tohispublick 
Journal.  As  particularly  for  hi^Labours  andbuccefs  there  among 
the  Indians, 

On  Wednefday,  July  31.  He  fet  out  on  his  Return  to  Crof- 
week/ung  ^2}[\d  arrived  there  the  nextDay.  In  his  Way  thither, he 
had  longing  Dtfires  that  be  might  come  to  theJndians  there, in  the 
fulnefsofthe  BleJJing  of  theGofpel  of  Chrift  ;  attended  with  a  Senfe 
cf  his  own  great  Weaknefs,  Dependance  and  Wonhlefnefs.  ] 

Friday,  Augufi  2.  In  the  Evening,  I  retired,  and  my  Soul 
was  drawn  out  in  Prayer  to  God  ;  efpecially  for  my  poor  Peo- 
ple, to  whom  I  had  fent  Word  that  they  might  gather  together, 
that  I  might  preach  to  'em  the  next  Y):.^.  I  vi'as  much  enlarged  < 
in  Praying  for  their  faving  Converfion  ;  and  fcarce  ever  found 
my  Defires  of  any  Thing  of  this  Nature  fo  fenfibly  and  clearly 
(  to  my  own  Satisfaction)  difinterefied,  and  iitt,  from  felfifh 
Views.  It  feem'd  to  me,  I  had  no  Care,  or  hardly  any  Defire 
to  be  the  Inftrumentof  fo  glorious  a  Work,  as  I  wifli'd  and 
pray'd  {or  among  the  Indians  \  If  the  blefTed  Woik  might  be 
accompliflied  to  the  Honour  of  God,  and  the  Enlargement  of 
the  dear  Redeemer'^  Kirgdcm,  this  v.'as  all  my  Defire  and 
Care  ;  and  for  this  Mere)'  I  hoiked,  but  with  Ticmbling ;  for  I 

felt 


of  Mr.  David  Brainerd.      A.D.  1 745.       161 

felt  what  7^^  exprefles,  Chapter  vx.,  16.  My  rifing  Hopes,  re- 
fpedling  the  Converfion  of  the  Indians^  have  been  lo  often  dafh- 
ed,  that  my  Spirit  is  as  it  were  broken,  and  Courage  wafted, 
^nd  1  hardly  dare  hope. 

[  Concerning  his  Labours  and  marvellous  Succefs  amongft  the 
Jndians^for  the  following  16  Days,  let  (he  Reader  fee  his  pubjick 
'Journal.  The  Things  worthy  of  Note  in  his  Diary,  not  there 
pubh'fhed,  are  his  earneft  and  importunate  Prayers  for  the  /n- 
diansy  and  the  Travail  of  his  Soul  for  them  from  Day  to  Day  ; 
and  his  great  Refrefliment  and  Joy  in  beholding  the  wonderful 
Mercy  of  God,  and  t!"»e  glorious  Manifeftations  of  his  Power 
and  Grace  in  his  VVork  among  them  ;  and  his  ardetJt  Thankf- 
givings  to  God  ;  his  Heart's  rejoycing  in  Chrift,  as  King  of 
his  Church,  and  King  of  his  Soul  ;  in  particular,  at  the  Sacra- 
ment of  the  Lord's  Supper,  at  Mr.  McNi^ht's  Meeting-Houfe  ; 
aSenfeofhis  own  exceeding  Unworthinefs  ;  which  fometimes 
was  attended  with  Deje<^ion  and  Melancholy.] 

Monday,  Jug.   ig. Near  Noon,  I  rede  ioFreehold,  and 

preached  to  a  confiderableAflembly,  ivomMatth.  v. 3.  It  plcafed 
God  to  leave  me  to  be  very  dry  and  barren  ,  (o  that  I  don't  re- 
member to  have  been  fo  ftraiten'd  for  a  whole  twelve  Month 
paft.  God  is  juft,  and  he  has  made  mv  Soul  acquiefce  in  his 
Will  in  this 'Regard.  'Tis  contrary  to Fle/h  and  Blood  to  be  cut 
off  from  all  Freedom,  in  a  large  Auditory,  where  their  Expedla- 
tions  are  much  raifed  ;  but  ^o  it  was  with  me  :  AndGod  helped 
me  to  fay  yimen  to  it  ',  Good  is  theWill  of  the  Lord.  In'theEven- 
ing,  I  felt  quiet  and  compofed,  and  had  Freedom  and  Comfof  t 
in  fecret  Prayer. 

Tuefday,  Jug.  20.  Was  compofed  and  comfortable,  ftill 
in  a  refigned  Frame.  Travelled  from  Mr.  Tennent's  in  Freehold 
to  Elifabeth-Town.  Was  refrefh'd  to  fee  Friends,  and  relate 
to  them  what  God  had  done,and  was  fiill  doing  among  my  poor 
People. 

Wednefday,  Jug.  21.  Spent  the  Forenoon  in  Converfation 
with  Mr.  Dickinforiy  contriving  fomething  for  the  Settlement  of 
the  Indians  together  in  a  Body,  that  they  might  be  under  better 
Advantages  for  Inftrudion.  In  the  Afternoon,  fpent  Time 
agreably  with  other  Friends  ;  wrote  to  my  Brother  at  College  : 
But  was  grieved  that  Ticne  Aid  away,  while  I  did  fo  little  for 
God. 

y  2  Frida}', 


1 52      ^t.is:  The  LIFE 

Friday,  Mg.  23.     In   the  Morning,   was  very  weak  •  hnt 
favoured  with  fome  Freedom  and   Sweetnef  [n  P^rfyer     Wa 
^ompored  and  comfortable  in  JMind.     After  Noon,  Vodrto 
Crojweikfms  to  my  poor  People '  "* 

frol'?h''7'/''^'^'^'~^"'"'^°'"P'''""f=&P"ce,  while  riding 
Sou?  trt'n  'T^  ^°''g'"S'  =  ^"^  ^"^bied  to  pour  out  my 
fcoul  to  God   for  dear  Fnends  m  New- England.     Felt  a  fweet 

LordVDay  A^.25 J  rode  to  myLodgingsin  theEven- 

mg  blefllng  ,he  Lord  for  his  gracious  Vifitation  of  the  S 
and  the  Soul-refrefhmg  Thmgs  I  had  feen  thcDay  paft  amon/ft 

Monday,  A^.26.--_I  went  from  the  7,^^«  to  my  Lodg- 
ings, rejoycng  for  the  Goodnefs  of  God  to  my  poor  People  • 
ana  enjoyed  Freedom  of  Soul  i„  Prayer,  and  other  ffiin 
theEvenmg.     Blefs  the  Lord,  O  my  Soul.  '"^""«,in 

nf  nUl"  "'"i  ?'^'  ^^  ^''  °"'  °"  "  ^""""^y  '""-"ds  the  Forks 
of  Z)./^i<.<,r.,dengn.ng  to  go  from  rbcnce  toSufquahar.„ab  before 
he  returned  to  C..>„i/^,,.     „  ,3,  fi,,  Q^/f  ,^„^  ^j^^'^f"  « 

ture  from  Cr^fw,ekfur:gMioro  he  reach'd  (hef.ri.,going  round 
by  the  W^yol  PhUaJelphia,  and  waiting  on  .he  Gove"  nour  of 
^"Jy'vama,  to  get  a  Recommendaiion  from  him  to  the  Chiefs 
of  he  /,i,..;  ;  which  he  obtainM.  He  fpeaks  of  much  Com 
fort  and  fp.ruual  Refrefhmen.  in  this  Journey  ;  and  alfo  a  Sel 
cU;L?£';^rS7^"'^^^'  '"'^'"^  '^in^relfthemeanS 
Lo,JvDay,  S^,.;„i,;.  ,.    (-  A,  theForks  ofi).;<,«;^r,  J , 

lilt  12.1"  U  t'l  '^^r^^r'  =""• ''  "'^^  =■  bi^fl-^'J  Seafon  in 
m^^T  {.  ;^^y  ^''"' ""=t'»«'"'  forMercy.inanalFcaionate 
Planner.     In  the  Ever.mg  alfo  my  Soul  rpjoyccd  in  God. 

[His  private  Dlar,  has  nothing  remarkable,  for  the  two  ne« 
B^s,  but  wlj^t  is  in  bis  publics  JwW.  ]  • 

JVedncfdjyj 


c/ Mr.  David  Brainerd:     A.D.  1745.     1^3 

Wednefday,  Sept.  4.  Rode  15  Miles  to  an  Iri/h  S(|ttlement, 
and  preachM  there  from  Luke  xiv  22. —  And  yet  there  is  Room. 
God  was  pleafed  to  afford  me  fome  Tender nefs  and  Enlarge- 
ment in  the  firft  Prayer,  and  much  Freedom,as  well  as  Warmth, 
in  Sermon.  There  were  many  Tears  in  the  Aflembly  :  The 
People  of  God  feemed  to  melt,  and  others  to  be  in  fome  Mea- 
fure  awakenM,  BleiTed  be  the  Lord,  that  lets  me  fee  his  Work 
going  on  in  one  Place  and  another. 

[  The  Account  for  Thurfday  is  the  fame  for  Subftanceas  in 
hispublick  Journal.] 

Friday,  Sept,  6.  Enjoyed  fome  Freedom  and  Intenfenefs  of 
Mind  in  Prayer  alone  ;  and  longed  to  have  mySoul  more  warm'd 
with  divine  and  heavenly  Things.  Was  fomewhat  melancholy, 
towards  Night,  and  longed  to  die  and  quit  a  Scene  of  Sin  and 
Darknefs  j  but  was  a  little  fupported  in  Prayer. 

[  This  Melancholy  continued  the  next  Day.] 

ljOrd*s^Day,Sept.  8.— In  theEveningjGod  was  pleafed  to 

enlarge  me  in  Prayer,  and  give  me  Freedom  at  the  Throne  of 
Grace  :  I  cried  to  God  for  the  Enlargement  of  his  Kingdom  in 
the  World,  and  in  particular  among  my  dear  People  ;  was  alfo 
ertabled  to  pray  for  many  dear  Minifters  of  my  Acquaintance, 
both  in  thefe  Parts,  and  in  New- England  ;  and  alfo  for  other 
dear  Friends  in  New-  England*  And  my  Soul  was  fo  engaged 
and  enlarged  in  that  fweet  Exercife,  that  I  fpent  near  an  Hour 
in  it,  and  knew  not  how  to  leave  the  Mercy-Seat.  Oh,  how  I 
delighted  to  pray  and  cry  to  God  ?  I  faw,  God  was  both  able 
and  willing  to  do  all  that  I  defired,  for  my  felf  and  Friends,  and 
bis  Church  in  general.  I  was  likewife  much  enlarged  and  allift- 
ed  in  Family-Prayer.  And  afterwards,  when  I  was  juft  going 
to  Bed,  God  helped  me  to  renew  myPetitions  withArdency  and 
Freedom.  Oh,  'twas  to  me  a  biefied Evening  of  Prayer  I  Blefs 
the  Lord,  O  my  Soul. 

[  The  next  Day,  he  kt  out  from  the  Forks  of  Delaware  to 
go  to  Sufquahannah.  And  on  the  fifth  Day  of  his  Journey,  he 
arrived  at  Shaumoking,  a  large  Indian  Town  on  Sufquahannah- 
River.  He  performed  the  Journey  under  a  confiderable  Degree 
of  Melancholy,  occafion'd  at  firft  by  his  hearing  that  the  Alora^ 
vkns  were  gone  befgre  him  to  the  Sufyuahann^- Indians.] 

Saturday, 


z64    mu  28.  Iht  LIFE 

Saturday,  Sepu  14.    [  At  Shaumoking  ]-, In  the  Evening, 

myboul  was  enlarged  aiid  fweetly  engaged  inPrayer  ;  efpeciallv, 
thatOoD  would  let  up  hisKingdom  in  thisPIace,  where  the  Devil 
now  reigns  in  the  moft  eminent  Manner.  And  I  was  enabled  to 
alk  this  /or  God,  for  his  Glory,  and  becaufe  I  longed  for  the 
iLnlargement  of  his  Kingdom,  to  the  Honour  of  his  dear  Name 
1  could  appeal  to  God  with  the  greateft  Freedom,  that  he  knew 
A  ^''  ^" '^^^r  Caufe,  and  not  my  own,  that  engaged  myHeart  - 
And  my  Soul  cried,  Z.r^,  fet  up  thy  Kingdom,  for  thine  ownG  lory. 
Glorify  thjfelf',  and  1 /halt  rejoyce.      Get  Honour   to  thy  blefTed 

^7fr'h     A   t'  "  f  ^  ^'^''''     ^'  "'^■'^  '"^-/V  ^hat  thou  wilt. 
Blefjed  be  thy  Name  forever,  that  thou  art  God,  and  that  thou  wilt 

frtfythyfef      O   that  the   whole    ll^orld  might  glorify  thee.     O 
Ut^theje  poor  People  ht  brought  to  know  thee,  and  love  thee,  for  the 
Glory  of  thy  dear  ever-blejjed  Name,     I  could  not  but  hope,    that 
Ood  would   bring  in   thefe  miferable,  wicked  Indians  :    Tho* 
there  appeared  little  humanProbability  of  it  ;  for  they  were  then 
dancing  and  revelling,    as  if  pofTefTed'by  the  Devil.     But  yet  f 
hoped,  iho'  againji  Hope,  that  God  would  be  glorified,  that  God's 
Name  would  be  glorified    by   thefe  poor  7W/^«;.     I  continued 
Jong  in  Prayer  and  Praife  to  God  ;  and  had  great  Freedom,  En- 
largement and  Sweetn^fs,  remembring  dearFriendsinA^^ru-^'^^- 
hnd,  as  well  as  the  People  of  ray  Charge.      Was  entirely  free 
from  that  Dejedion  of  Spirit, with  which  I  am  frequently  exer- 
cifed  :  Blelled  be  God. 

[  His  Diary  from  this  Time  ioSept.  22.  ( the  laft  Day  of  his 
Continuance  among  the  Indiam  at  Sufquahannah)  is  not  legible  , 
by  Reafon  of  the  Badnefs  of  the  Ink.  It  was  probably  written 
with  the  Juice  of  fome  Berries  found  in  the  Woods,  having  no 
other  Ink  in  that  VVildernefs.  So  that  for  this  Space  of  Time 
the  Reader  muft  be  wholly  refer'd  to  his  publick  Journal. 

On  Monday,  Sept.  23.  He  left  the  Indians,  in  order  to  his 
Return  to  the  Porks  of  Delazvare,  in  a  very  weak  State  of  Body, 
and  under  Dejeaion  of  Mind,  which  continued  the  two  firft 
Days  of  his  Journey,  j 

Wednefday,  Sept.  25.  Rode  ftill  homeward.  In  the  Fore- 
noon, enjoy 'd  l^reedom  and  Intenfenefs  of  Mind  in  Meditation 
on  yob  xln.  5,6.  ;  have  heard  of  Thee  by  the  hearing  of  theEar  ; 
hut  now  mine  Eye  feeth  thee  :  IVberefore  habhor  my  felt,  and  repent 
in  Dufl  and  /JJhes.  The  Lord  gave  me  Clearnefs  to  penetrate  ^ 
mto  the  fweet  Truths  contained  in  that  Text.  It  was  a  com- 
lortable  and  fweet  Seafon  to  me» 


Thurfday 


(?/Afr.  David  Braiherd.     A.D.1745.     165 

Thurfday,  Sept*  26.  Was  ftill  much  diforder'd  in  Body,  and 
able  to  ride  but  flowly.  Continued  my  journey  however. 
Near  Night,  arrived  at  the  Iri/h  Settlement,  about  15  Miles 
from  mine  own  Houfe.  This  Day,  while  riding,  1  was  much 
exercifed  with  a  Senfe  of  my  Barrennefs  ;  and  verily  thought, 
there  was  no  Creature  that  had  any  true  Grace,  but  what  was 
more  fpiritual  and  fruitful  than  I ;  I  could  not  think  that  any 
of  God's  Children  made  fo  poor  a  fiand  of  living  to  God  as  L 

Friday,  S^pi.  27.  Spent  confidcrableTime,  in  the  Morning;* 
in  Prayer  and  Praife  to  God.  My  Mind  was  fomewhat  intenfe 
in  the  Duty,  and  my  Heart  in  fome  Degree  warm*d  with  aSenfe 
of  divine  Things :  My  Soul  was  melted,  to  think,  that  God  had 
accounted  me  faithful^  putting  me  into  the  Minijiry,  notwithftand- 
ing  all  my  Barrennefs  and  Deadnefs.  My  Soul  was  alfo  in  fomc 
Meafure  enlarged  in  Prayer  for  the  dear  People  of  my  Charge, 
as  well  as  for  other  dearFriends.  In  theAfternoon,vi{ited  fome 
Chriftian  Friends,  and  fpent  theTime,  I  think,  profitably  :  My 
Heart  was  warm'd,  and  more  engaged  in  the  Things  of  God. 
In  the  Evening,  I  enjoyed  Enlargement,  Warmth,  andComfort 
in  Prayer  .•  My  Soul  relied  on  God  for  Afliftance  and  Grace  to 
enable  me  to  dofomething  in  his  Caufe  :  My  Heart  was  drawn 
out  in  Thankfulnefs  to  God  for  what  he  had  done  for  his  own 
Glory  among  my  poorPeople  of  late  :  And  I  felt  encouraged  to 
proceed  in  his  Work,  being  perfwaded  of  his  Power,and  hoping 
his  Arm  might  be  further  revealed^  for  the  Enlargeiaent  of  his 
dearKingdom  :  And  my  Soul  rejoycedin  hope  of  the  Glory  of  Gody 
in  Hope  of  the  Advancement  of  his  declarative  Glory  in  the 
World,  as  well  as  of  enjoying  him  in  a  World  of  Glory.  Oh, 
ble/Ted  be  God,  the  living  God,  forever  ! 

[  He  continued  in  this  comfortable,  fweet  Frame  of  Mind, 
the  two  next  Days.  On  theDay  following,  he  went  to  his  own 
Houfe,  in  the  Forks  of  Delaware^  and  continued  fiill  in  the  fame 
Frame.  Thene^Day,  which  was  Tuefday,  he  vifited  his  /«- 
dians, Wednefday  he  fpent  moftly  in  writing  the  Medita- 
tions he  had  had  in  his  latejourney  to  Sufquahannah.  On  Tharf- 
jday,  he  left  the  Forks  of  Delaware^  and  travelled  towards  Crof- 
weekfung^  where  he  arrived  on  Saturday  (  O^ob.  5.)  and  conti- 
nued from  Day  to  Day  in  a  comfortable  State  of  Mind.  There 
is  nothing  material  in  his  Diary  for  this  Day  and  'he  next,  but 
what  is  in  his  printed  JournaL} 

Monday, 


>66      JElzS.  nehll^E 

Monday,  O£foh.  7.  Being  called  by  the  Church  and  People 
of  Eaflhamptonon  Long'ljlandy  2iS2L  Member  of  a  Council,  to 
ailift  and  advife  in  Affairs  of  Difficulty  in  that  Church,  I  fet  out 
on  my  Journey  this  Morning,  before  it  was  well  Light,  and  tra- 
velled to  EliJabeih'Towny  and  there  lodged.  Enjoyed  feme 
Comfort  on  the  Road,  in  Converfation  with  Mr.  tVilliamTen^ 
nent^  who  was  fent  for  on  the  fame  Bufinefs. 

[  He  profecuted  his  Journey  with  thcotherMinifters  that  were 
fent  for  ;  and  did  not  return  till  Oifob.  24.  While  he  was  at 
E a fl- Hampton^  the  Importance  of  the  Bufinefs  that  the  Council 
were  come  upon,lay  with  fuch  Weight  on  his  Mind,  and  he  was 
fo  concerned  for  the  Intereft  of  Religion  in  that  Place,  that  he 
flept  but  little  for  feveral  Nights  fucceflively.  In  his  Way  to 
and  from  Ea/i- Hampton ^  he  had  feveral  Seafons  of  fweetRefrefh- 
ment,  wherein  his  Soul  was  enlarged  and  comforted  with  divine 
Confolations,  in  fecret  Retirement ;  and  he  had  fpecial  Affift- 
ance  in  publick  miniflerial  Performances  in  the  Houfe  of  God  ; 
and  yet,  at  the  fame  Time,  a  Scnfe  of  extreme  Vilenefs  and  Un- 
proiitablenefs.  He  from  Time  to  Time  fpeaks  of  Soul-refrefh- 
ment  and  Comfort  in  Converfation  with  the  Miniftcrs  that  tra- 
velled with  him  ;  and  fecms  to  have  little  or  nothing  of  Melan- 
choly, 'till  he  came  to  the  Welt-End  of  Long-J/Iandy  in  his 
Return.  After  that, he  was  opprefTed  withDeje6tion  andGloomi- 
nefs  of  Mind,  for  feveral  Days  together. —  For  an  Account  of 
the  four  firft  Days  after  his  return  from  his  Journey,  I  refer  the 
Reacier  to  his  publick  Journal. 

Monday,G/f?(7^.28. Had  anEvening  of  fweetRefrefting; 

my  Thoughts  were  raifed  to  a  blefTed  Eternity  ;  my  Soul  was 
melted  with  Defircs  of  perfedt  Holinefs,  and  perfedtly  glorifying 
God. 

Tuefday,  OSfoh.  2g.  About  Noon,  rode  and  view'd  the 
Indian  Lands  at  Cranberry  :  Was  much  dejected,  and  grea:ly 
perplexed  in  Mind  :  Knew  not  how  to  fee  any  Body  again,  my 
Soul  was  fo  funk  within  me.  Oh  that  thefe  Trials  might  make 
me  more  hurable  and  holy.  Oh  that  God  would  keep  me 
from  giving  Way  to  finful  Dejedion,  which  may  hinder  my 
Ufefulnefs. 

Wednefday,  O^ob.  30.  My  Soul  was  refrefhcd  with  ^ 
View  of  the  Continuance  of  God's  blcfi'ed  Work  among  the 
Indians* 

Thurfday,  Osiob.  31.  Spent  mofl  of  the  Day  in  Writing  : 
Enjoyed  not  much  fpiritualComfort  ;  but  was  not  fo  much  funk 
With  Melancholy  as  at  fome  other  Times. 

Friday^ 


of  Mr,  David  Brainerd.       A.D.  1 745.     1 6j 

Friday,  Nov.  i.  [See  the  publick  jfournal.  ] 
Saturday,  Nov.  2.  Spent  the  D^y  with  ihelndians,  and  wrote 
fome  Things  of  Importance ;  and  long'd  to  do  more  for  God, 
than  I  did,  or  cou  d  do  in  this  prefent  feeble  and  imperfedStatc. 
[  Nov.   3.  &  4.  [  See  the  publick  Journal,  ] 
Tuefday,  Nov.  5.  He  left  the  Indians,  and  Tpent  the  remain- 
ing Part  of  this  Week  in  travelling  to  variousPartsofA^^«/-7^'/0'> 
in  order  to  get  a  ColU^ion  for  the  Ufe  of  the  Indians,  and  to 
obtain  a  School- Mafler  toinftrudt  them.  And  in  the  meanTime, 
he  fpeaksof  very  fweet  Refrefhment  and  Entertainment  with 
Chriftian  Friends,   and  of  his  being  fweetly  employed,  while 
ridingjin  Meditation  on  divine  Subjeds  ;  his  Heart's  being  en- 
larged, his  Mind  clear,  his  Spirit  refrefhed  with  divine  Truths, 
and  his  Heart'' s  burning  within  him, while  he  went  by  the  PVay^ani 
the  Lord  opened  to  him  the  Scriptures.  ] 

Lord's- Day,  Nov.  10.  [At  Elizabeih-Town.  ]  V/as  com- 
fortable in  the  Morning,  both  in  Body  and  Mind  ;  preachM  in 
the  Forenoon  from  2  Cor,  v.  20.  God  was  pleafed  to  give  me 
Freedom  and  Fervency  in  my  Difcourfc;  and  the  Prefence  of 
God  feem'd  to  be  in  theAfTembly  :  Numbers  were  afFe6lcd,and 
there  were  manyTears  among  them.  In  the  Afternoon, preachM 
from  Luk.  xiv.  22.  And  yet  there  is  Room,  Was  favourM  with 
divine  AfTiftance  in  the  firft  Prayer,  and  poured  out  my  Soul  to 
CS^od  with  a  filial  Temper  of  Mind  ;  the  living  God  alfo  ailided 
me  in  Sermon. 

[  The  next  Day,  he  went  to  New-Town  on  Long-ljland,  to 
a  Meeting  of  the  Prefoyiery,  He  fpeaks  of  fome  fweet  Medi- 
tations he  had  while  there,  on  Chrifi^s  delivering  up  the  Kingdom 
to  the  Father,  and  of  hisboul's  being  much  refrelh'd  and  warm'd 
with  the  Confideration  of  that  blifsfui  Day.  ] 

Friday,  Nov.  15.  Could  not  crofstheFerry  by  Rcafonof  the 
Violence  of  the  Wind  ;  nor  could  I  enjoy  any  Place  of  Retire- 
ment at  the  Ferry-Houfe  :  So  that  I  was  in  Perplexity.  Yet 
God  gave  me  fome  Satisfaction  and  Sweetnefs  inMeditation,and 
lifting  up  my  Heart  to  God  in  the  midfl  of  Company.  And 
altho'  fome  were  drinking  and  talking  profanely? which  was  in- 
deed a  Grief  to  me,  yet  my  Mind  was  calm  and  comppfod. 
And  I  could  not  but  blefs  God,  that  I  was  not  like  to  fpeod  an 
Eternity  in  fuchCompany.  In  theEvening,  I  fat  down  and  wrote 
with  Compofure  and  Freedom  ;  and  can  fay  (  through  pure 
Grace  )  it  was  a  comfortable  Evening  to  my  Scul,  an  Evening 
1  was  enabled  to  fpend  in  the  Service  of  C3cd. 

Z  Saturday^ 


i68     yEt  28.  "The  LIFE 

Saturday,  Nov*  16.  Crofs'd  theFerry  about  tcrto'Clock  ;  ar- 
rived at  Eliza  be  tb-Toivn  near  Night.     Was  in  a  calm  compofed 
Frame  of  Mind,  and  felt  an  entire  Refignation  with  Refpedl  to 
a  Lofs  I  had  lately  fuftain*d,  in  having  my  Horfe  ftollen  from  mc 
the  laftVVednefdayNight,at  New-Town,     Had  fomeLongings  of 
Soul  for  the  dear  People  of  EUzaheth-Town^   that  God  wonld 
pour  out  his  Spirit  upon  them, and  revive  hisWork  amongft  them. 
[  He  fpent  the  four  next  Days  at  Elizabeth-Town  y  for  the 
moft  Part,  in  a  Free  and  Comfortable  State  of  Mind,    intenfcly 
engaged  in  the  Service  of  God,  and  enjoying,  at  fome  Times, 
the  fpccial  Affiftances  of  his  Spirit.     OnThurfdayjthisVVeekjhe 
rode  to  Freehold ^3iT\d  fpent  theDay  under  confiderableDejedion.l 
Friday,  A^<?u.  2  2,   Rode  to  Mr.  Tennent^s^  and  fromlhence  to 
Crofvueekfung,     Had  h'ttle  Freedom  in  Meditation,  whife  riding; 
which  vi^asaGrief  and  Burden  to  my  Soul.     Oh  that  I^could  fill 
up  all  my  Time,  whether  in  the  Houfe  or  by  the  Way,  forGod! 
I  was  enabled,   I  think,  this  Day  to  give  up  mySoultoGcd, 
and  put  over  all  my  Concerns  into  his  Hands  ;  and   found  fome 
real  Confolation  in  the  Tnought  of    being  entirely  at  the  divine 
Difpofal,  and  having  no  Will  or  Intereftof  my  own.     I  have  re- 
ceived  my  all  from  God  ;  Oh  that  I  could  return  my  all  to 
God.     Surely  God  is  worthy  of  my  higheftAfFeftion,  and  moft 
devout  Adoration  :  He  is  infinitely  worthy,   that  I  fhould  make 
him  my  laft  End,    and  live  forever  to  him  :  Oh  that  I  might 
never  more,   in  any  one  lnflance,live  to  my  felf. 

Saturday,  A^ot/.  23.  Vifited  my  People ;  fpent  the  Day  with 
them  :  Wrote  fome  Things  of  Importance.  But  was  pretty 
muGh  deje<5ted,  moft  of  the  Day. 

[  There  is  nothing  very  material  in  hisD/^ry  for  the  four  next 
Days,  but  what  is  alfo  in  his  publick  JournaL  ] 

Thurfday,  Nav.  28 I  enjoyed  fome  divine  Comfort, 

and  Fervency  in  the  publick  Exercife,  and  afterwards.  And 
while  ridiiTg  to  my  Lodgings,  was  favoured  with  fome  fweet 
Meditations  on  £^.i  ix,  2,"^'  Who  appeared  in  Glory ^  and /pake 
ofhii  Deceafe,  which  he  Jhould  acccmplijh  at  Jerufalem.  My 
Tho'ts  ran  with  Freedom,  and  I  faw  and  fek  what  a  glorious 
Subjea  the  Death  of  Ckr  i  s  r  is  for  ^hrljied  Souls  to  dwell  upon 
in  their  Converfafion.  Oh,  the  Death  of  Christ  !  Hov/  in- 
^M\\tz\s precicui  ! 

[  For  the  tliree  next  Days,  fee  the  publick  Journal] 
Monday,  Deamb.  2.   Was  much   atFeiSled  with  Grief,  that  I 
had  not  lived  more  to  Gcd  ;  and  felt  fhong  Refoluticns  todou- 
blcmy  Dii'gcnce  in  my  Mifter*s Service. 

^         ^  ^  f  A'-tcr 


of  Mr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1745.      169 

[  After  this,  he  went  to  a  Meeting  of  the  Prefhytery,  at  a 
Place  mNew-JerJey^caWQdConneSikut-Fiirms  5  which  cccafion'd 
hisAbfence  from  his  People  the  rtftof  (his  V/eek.  He  fpeaks 
of  fome  Searons  of  Sweetnefs,  Solemnity  anaTpiritual  AiFeclion 
in  his  Abfence. 

Lord's-Day,  Decemh,  8.     See  his  publick  Journal'] 

Monday,  JDccem.  9.  Spent  moft  of  the  Day  in  procuring 
Provifions,  in  Order  to  my  fetting  up  Hou^e-keeping  among 
the  Inoians,  Enjoyed  little  Satisfadion  thro'  the  Day,  being 
veryjmuch  out  of  my  Element. 

Tuefday,  Decemh.  10.  Was  engaged  in  the  fame  Bufinefs 
as  Yefterday.     Towards  Night,  got  into  my  own  Houfe.* 

Wednefday,  D^f^zw.  II.  Spent  the  Forenoon  in  neccflary 
Labour  about  my  Houfe.  In  the  Afternoon,  rode  out  upon 
Bufmefs,  and  fpent  the  Evening  with  fome  Satisfa<Slion  among 
Friends  in  Converfation  on  a  ferious  and  profitable  Subjedl. 

[  Thurfday,  Decern,  12.     See  his  piiblick  Journall 

Friday,  Decern,  13.  Spent  the  Day  mainly  in  Labour  about 
my  Houfe.  In  the  Evening,  fpent  forae  Time  in  writing  ; 
but  was  very  weary,  and  much  out-done  with  the  Labour  ot 
the  Day. 

Saturday,  Decern.  14.  Rofe  early,and  wrote  by  Candle- Light 
fome  confiderable  Time  ;  fpent  moft  of  the  Day  in  writing  : 
But  was  fomewhat  dejeded.  In  the  Evening,  was  exercifed 
with  a  Pain  in  my  Head. 

[  For  the  twonextDaySjfee  his  publick y^wrffa/.  The  remain- 
der of  thisWeek  he  fpent  chiefly  in  writing  :  Seme  part  of  the 
Time  under  aDegree  of  Melancholy  \  but  fome  Part  of  it  with 
a  fweet  Ardency  in  Religion.] 

Saturday,  Decern.  21.  ■  ■  After  my  Labours  with  the  In^' 
dians,  I  fpent  fome  Time  in  writing  fome  Things  divine  and 
folemn  i  and  was  much  wearied  with  the  Labours  of  the  Day  ; 

1 
*  This  is  the  third  Houfe  that  he  built  to  dwell  in  by  him- 
felf  among  the /»df'/a«j  ;  The  fir  ft  at  Kaunaumeek  in  the 
County  of  Many  ;  the  fecond  at  the  Forks  of  Delaware 
in  Penfylvania  ;  And  now  this  at  Crofweckfung  in  ISIew- 
Jerfey. 

Z  2  found 


1 70    Ml  28:  W^  L I F  E  1 746. 

found  that  mySpirlts  were  extremely  fpent,  and  that  I  could  do 
no  more.  I  am  confcious  to  my  felf  that  my  Labours  are  as 
great  and  conftant  as  my  Nature  will  bear,  and  that  ordina- 
rily I  go  to  theExtent  of  my  Strength  ;  So  that  I  do  all  I  can  : 
But  the  Mifery  is,  I  don't  labour  with  that  heavenly  Temper, 
that  fingle  Eye  to  the  Glory  of  God,     that  i  long  for. 

[  Lord's-Day,  Decern.  12.     See  x\\t^M\ck  Journal] 

Monday,  and  Tuefday,  Decern.  23  &  24.  Spent  thefe  Days 
in  Writing,  with  the  utm  )(t  Diligeace.  Felt  in  the  main  a 
fweet  Mortification  to  the  World,  and  a  Delire  to  live  and  la*- 
bouronly  for  God  ;  but  wanted  more  Warmth  andSpirituality, 
a  more  fenfibie  and  afFeciionate  Regard  to  the  Glory  of  God. 
[.  Wednefday,  Dec.  25.  See  the  publick  yewrna/.  ] 

ThurfJay,  and  Friday,  Decern.  26,  &  27  Laboured  in  my 
Studies,  to  the  utmoft  of  myStrength  :  And  tho'  I  felt  a  fteady 
Difpofition  of  Mind  to  live  to  God,  nnd  that  I  had  nothing  in 
this  World  to  live  for  r  yet  I  did  not  find  that  fenfibIeAiFe6tioii 
in  the  Service  of  God, that  I  wanted  to  have  ;  myHeart  feem'd 
barren,  tho'  my  Head  and  Hands  were  full  of  Labour, 

[  For  the  four  next  Days,  fee  his  publick  Journal,*] 

Wednefday,  January  i.  1745,6. 1  am  thisDay  begin- 
ning a  New-Tear  ;  and  God  has  carried  me  thro*  numerous 
Trials  and  Labours  in  th?  paft.  He  has  amazingly  fupported 
my  feeble  Frame  ;  for  having  obtained  Help  of  God,  I  continue 
to  this  Day  O  that  I  might  live  nearer  to  God,  this  Year, than 
1  did  the  laft.  The  Bufinefs  I  have  been  called  to,  and  enabled 
to  go  through,  I  know,has  been  as  great  as  Nature  could  bear 
up  under,  and  what  would  have  funk  and  overcome  me  quite, 
without  fpecial  Supoort.  But  Alas,  Alas  I  Tho*  I  have  done 
the  Labours,  anJ  ertdured  the  Trials,  with  what  Spirit  have  I 
done  the  one,  and  bDrii  the  other  ?  How  cold  has  been  the 
Frame  of  my  Heart  oftentimes  I  And  how  little  have  I  fenfibly 
eyed  the  Glory  of  God,  in  all  myDoings  andSufferings  I  I  have 
found,  that  I  could  have  no  Peace  without  filling  up  all  my 
Time  with  Labours  ;  and  thus  NeceJJity  has  been  laid  upon  me  ; 
yea,  in  that  Refpeft,  I  have  loved  to  labour:  But  theMifery  is, 
f  could  not  fenftblv  labour  for  God,a.s  {  would  have  done.  May 
1  for  the  future  be  enabled  more  fenfibly  to  make  the  Glory  of 
God  my  all. 


On  the  fi:/t  of  tbefePays  he  wrote  the  6thZ,^//<r  here  pub- 
: ilj'd  a  I  ih?  Kiid. 

Tot 


e?/ Mr.  David  Bralnerd.     A.D.  1746.     171 

[  For  the  Space  from  this  Time  'till  the  next  Monday,  fee 
the  pubh'ck  Journal.] 

Monday,  Jan.  6  Being  very  weak  in  Body,  I  rode  for  my 
Health.  While  riding,  my  Thoughts  were  fweetly  engaged, 
for  a  Time,  upon  theStone  cut  out  of  the  Mountain  without  Hands  y 
which  brake  in  Pieces  all  before  it,  and  waxed  great,  and  became 
a  great  Mountain^  z^A  filled  the  whole  Earth  :  And  I  longed  that 
Jesus  (hould  take  to  him/elf  his  great  Power,  and  reign  to  the 
Ends  of  the  Earth,  And  Oh,  how  fweet  were  the  Moments, 
wherein  I  /eit  my  Soul  warrti  with  Hopes  of  the  Enlargement 
of  the  Redeemer's  Kingdom  1  I  wanted  nothing  elfe  but  that 
Christ  (hould  reigny  to  the  Glory  of  his  blefled  Name. 

t  The  next  Day  he  complains  of  want  of  Fervency.  ] 

Wednefday,  Jatt,  8.  In  the  Evening,  mv  Heart  was  drawn 
out  afterGod  in  fecret :  My  Soul  was  refre{h*d  and  quicken'd  ; 
and  I  truft.  Faith  was  in  Exercife.  J  had  great  Hopes  of  the 
Ingathering  of  precious  Souls  to  Chrift ;  not  only  among  my 
own  People,  but  others  alfo.  I  was  fweetly  refigned  and  com- 
pofcd  under  my  bodily  Weaknefs  -,  and  was  willing  to  liveor 
die,  and  defirous  to  labour  for  God  to  the  utmoft  of  my 
Strength. 

Thurfday,  Jan,  9.  Was  ftill  very  weak, and  much  exercifed 
with  vapoury  Diforders.  In  the  Evening,  enjoyed  fome  En- 
largement and  Spirituality  in  Prayer.  Oh  that  I  could  always 
fpend  my  Time  profitably,  both  in  Health  and  Weaknefs. 

Friday,  Jan.  10.  My  Soul  was  in  a  fweet,  calm,  ccmpofed 
Frame,  and  my  Heart  fiil'd  with  Love  to  all  the  World  ;  and 
Chriftian  Simplicity  and  Tendernefs  feemed  then  to  prevail  and 
reign  within  me.  NearNight,vifited  a  feriousBaptift-  Minifter, 
and  had  fome  agreabie  Converfation  with  him  5  and  found  that 
I  could  tafte  God  in  Friends. 

[  For  the  four  next  Days,  fee  the  publick  JournaL] 

Wednefday,  Jan,  15.  MySpirits  were  very  low  and  flat,and 
I  could  not  but  think  I  was  aBurden  toGod*sEarth  ;  and  could 
fcarcely  look  any  Body  in  the  Face,  thro'  Shame  and  Senfe  of 
Barrennefs.     God  pity  a  poor  unprofitable  Creature. 

[  The  two  next  Days,  he  had  fome  Comfort  and  Refrefh- 
mcnt.     Forihe  two  following  Days,  fee  the  ^hYizk  Journal. 

The 


172  Ml  28.  5r;&^  LIFE 

The  next  Day,  he  Tet  out  on  a  Journey  to  Elifabeth-Towny 
to  confer  with  the  Coirefpondents  at  their  Meeting  there  ;  and 
enjoyed  much  fpiritual  Refrefhnient  frjm  Day  to  J3ay, through 
this  Week.  The  Things  exprefled  in  this  Space  of  Time,  are 
fuch  as  thefe  ;  Serenity,  Compofure,  Swcernefs^and  Tenderncfs 
of  Soul,  Thankfgiving  toGod  for  his  Succ^'s  among  the  Indians^ 
Delight  in  Prayer  and  Pr^ife,  fwtct  and  profitable  Medications 
on  various  divine  Subjects,  L^^nging  for  more  Love,  for  more 
Vigour  to  live  to  God,  for  a  Life  more  intirely  devoted  toGod, 
that  he  might  fpend  all  his  Time  profitably  for  God,  and  in  his 
Caufe  ;  converfing  on  fpiritual  Subjects  with  Affedtion  ;  and 
Lamentation  for  unprofiiablenefs. 

Lord's-Day,  jfan.  26.  [  At  Conne^icut^Farmu  ]  Was  calm 
and  compofed.  Was  made  fenfible  of  my  utter  Inability  to 
preach,  without  divine  Help;  and  was  in  fome  good  Meafure 
willing  to  leave  it  with  God,  to  give  or  with-hold  Alliftance,  as 
he  faw  would  be  molt  for  his  own  Glory,  Was  favoured  with 
a  confiderabJe  Degree  of  AfTiftance  in  my  publick  Work.  After 
publick  Woifhip,  I  was  in  a  fweet  and  folemn  Frame  of  Mind, 
thankful  to  God  that  he  had  made  me  in  fome  Meafure  faithful 
in  addrefHng  precious  Souls, but  grievdd  that  I  had  been  no  more 
fervent  in  my  Work  5  and  was  tenderly  affected  towards  all 
the  World,  longing  that  every  Sinner  might  be  faved  ;  and 
could  not  have  entertain'd  any  Bitternefs  towards  the  worft 
Enemy  living.  In  the  Evening,rode  to  E lifabeth'Town  :  while 
riding,  was  almoft  conflantly  engaged  in  lifting  up  my  Heart  to 
God,  left  I  fhould  lofe  t4iat  fweet  heavenly  Solemnity  and  Com- 
pofure of  Soul  1  then  enjoyed.  Afterwards,  was  pleafed,  to 
think,  that  God  reigneth  ;  and  thought,  1  could  never  be  un- 
eafy  with  any  of  his  Difpenfations  ;  but  muft  be  entirely  Satis- 
fied, what  ever  Trials  he  fliould  caufe  me  or  his  Church  to  en- 
counter. Never  felt  more  b'edatenefs,  divine  Serenity  andCom- 
pofure  of  Mind  :  Could  freely  have  left  the  deareft  earthly 
Fiiend,  for  the  Society  of  Jngeh  and  Spirits  of  juji  Men  made 
•perftei :  My  AfFc^tions  foar'd  aloft  to  the  bfelled  Author  of 
every  dear  Enjoyment  :  I  vicw'd  the  Kniptinef>  andUnfatisfac- 
tory  Nature  of  the  molt  defirabie  earthly  Obje<Sls,  any  further 
than  God  isfeen  in  them  :  and  longed  for  aLife  of  Spirituality 
and  inward  Purity  ;  without  which,  I  faw,  there  could  be  no 
true  Pieafure. 

f  He  retained  a  greatDegree  of  thisexcellentFrame  ofMind, 
the  four  next  Days.  As  to  his  publick  Services  for  and  among 
thclndians^  and  hisSucccfs  in  lhisTimc,fee  the  publicky^«r»tf/.]' 

biturday 


of  Mr,  Davia  Brainerd.     A.D.  i  j^6.     1 73 

Saturday,  Fd.  i.  Towards  NjVht,  enjoyed  fome  of  the  clear- 
eft  Thoughts  on  a  divine  Subject  (  vi%.  that  treated  of  1  Cor. 
XV.  13,-16.)  that  ever  I  remember  to  have  had  upon  anySub- 
je6l  whatfoever ;  and  fpent  tv/oor  threeHours  in  writing  them. 
I  vi^as  refrelhM  virith  this  Intenfenefs  :  My  Mind  wasfo  engaged 
in  thefe  Meditations,  I  could  fcarcely  turn  it  to  anv  Thing  elfe  5 
and  indeed  1  could  pot  be  willing  to  part  with  fo  fweet  an  Ea^ 
tertainment.  ■ 

Lord's-Day,  Feb,  2 After  gublickWorfHIi), my  bodily 

Strength  being  much  fpent,  my  Spirits  ^nk  amazingly  5  and  ef- 
pecially  on  hearing  that  I  was  fo  generally  taken  to  be  a  Roman 
Catholick^  fent  by  the  Papijis  to  draw  the  Indians  into  an  Infur- 
redion  againft  the  Englifhy  that  fome  were  in  Fear  of  me,  and 
others  were  for  having  me  taken  up  by  Authority  and  punifh'd. 
Alas,  what  will  not  the  Devil  do  to  bring  a  Slur  artvi  Difgrace 
on  the  Work  of  God  I  Oh,  how  holy  and  circumfpea:  had  I 
need   to  be  !  Thro'  divine  Goodnefs,  I  have  been  enabled  to 
mind  my  own  Bufmefsy  in  thefe  Parts,  as  well  as  elfewhere  ;  and 
to  let  all  Men  and  all  Denominations  of  Men  alone,   as  to  their 
Party  Notions  5  and  only  preach'd  the  plain  and  neceflary Truths 
oiChrifiianity^  neither  inviting  to  nor  excluding  from  my  meeting 
Any,  of  any  Sort  or  Perfwafion  v/hatfoever.     Towards  Night, 
the  Lord  gave  me  Freedom  at  the  Throne  of  Grace,  in  my  firft 
Prayer   before  my  Catechetical  Ledure :  And  in   opening  the 
xlvi.  Pfalm  to  my  People,  my  Soul  confided  in  God,  altho'  the 
wicked  World  fhould  flander  and  perfecute  me,  or  even  con- 
demn and  execute  me  as  a  Traitor  to  my  King  and  Country. 
Truly  God  is  a  pr^fent  Help  in  Time  of  Trouble,  [n  theE  vening, 
my  Soul  was  in  fome  Meafure  comforted,  having   fome  Hope 
that  one  poor  Soul  was  brought  Home  to  God  this  Day  ;   tho' 
the  Cafe  did  by  no  Means  appear  clear.     Oh  that  I  could    fill 
up  every  Moment  of  Time,  during  my  Abode  here  below,  in 
the  Service  of  my  God  and  King. 

Monday,  Feb.  3.  My  Spirits  were  flill  much  funk  with  what 
I  heard  the  Day  before,  of  my  being  fufpeded  to  be  engaged  iti 
the  Pretender* i  Intereft  ;  It  griev'd  me,  th^t  after  there  had  beet* 
fo  much  Evidence  of  a  glorious  Work  of  Grace  among  thefe  poor 
Indians^  as  that  the  moft  carnal  Men  could  rot  but  rake  Notice 
of  the  greatCbsnge  made  among  them,  fo  many  poorSjuls  fhould 
ftill  fufpc<Sl  the  whole  to  be  only  z  Popij9)  Plot,  andfo  caftan 
awful  Reproach  on  this  blefled  Work  of  the  divine  Spirit  ; 
and  at  the  fame  Time  wholly  e^clud^^  thcmfelves  from  receiving 
any  Benefit  by  this  divine  Infljeace.     This  put  me  upon  fcarch- 


174    ^/.  28.  ne  LIFE 

ing  whether  I  had  ever  drop*d  any  Thing  inadvertently,  that 
might  give  Occafion  to  any  to  fufpe6l  that  I  was  ftirring  up  the 
Indians  againft  the  EngUJh  :  And  could  think  of  Nothing,  un- 
lefs  it  was  my  attempting  fometimes  to  vindicate  the  Rights  of 
the  Indians^  and  complaining  of  the  horrid  Pra6lice  of  making 
the  Indians  driink,  and  then  cheating  them  out  of  theirLands  and 
oiherProperties  :  And  once,  I  remembred,  I  had  done  this  with 
too  much  Warmth  of  Spirif.  And  this  much  diftrefs'd  me; 
thinking  thft  this  might  poiTibly  prejudice  them  againft  (his 
Work  of  Grace,  to  their  everlafting  Deftrudlion.  God,  I  be- 
lieve, did  me  good  by  this  Trial  ;  which  ferved  to  humble  me, 
and  fhew  me  the  Neceffity  of  Watchfulnefs,  and  of  being  wife 
as  a  Serpent^  as  well  as  harmUfs  as  a  Dove,  This  Exercife  led 
me  often  to  rhe  Throne  of  Grace  ;  and  there  I  found  fome  Sup- 
port :  Tho'  I  could  not  get  the  Burden  wholly  removed.  Was 
aiTifted  in  Prayer,  efpecially  in  the  Evening. 

[  He  remained  f!ill  under  aDegree  of  Exercife  of  Mind  about 
this  Affair  ;  which  continued  to  have  the  fame  Effcd  upoa  him, 
to  caufe  him  to  refledt  upon,  and  humble  himfelf,  and  frequent 
the  Throne  of  Grace  :  But  foon  found  himfelf  much  more  re- 
lieved and  Tupported.  He  was,  this  Week,  in  an  extremely 
weak  Stare,  and  obliged  (as  he  exprefies  it )  to  confume  confidertL- 
bh  Ttmi  in  Diver/ton)  for  his  Health, 

For  Saturday,  Feb.  7.  And  the  Sabbath  following,  fee  his 
publick  Journal, 

The  Monday  after,  he  fet  out  on  a  Journey  to  the  Forks  of 
Delaware,  to  vifit  the  Indians  there.  He  performed  the  Jour- 
ney under  great  Weaknefs,  and  fcmetimes  was  exercifed  with 
much  Pain  j  but  fays  nothing  of  Dejection  and  Melancholy. 
He  arrived  at  his  own  Houfe  at  the  Forks,  en  Friday.  The 
Things  appertaining  to  his  inward  Frames  and  Exercifes,  ex- 
prefs'd  withia  this  Week,  are  fweetCompofure  ofMind,Thank- 
fulnefs  to  God  for  his  Mercies  to  him  and  others,  Refignation 
to  the  divir.e Will,  Comfort  inPraycr  and  religious  Converfation, 
his  Heart  drawn  out  after  God,  and  affeded  with  a  Senfe 
of  his  own  Barrennefs,  as  well  as  the  Fulnefs  and  Freenefs  of 
divine  Grace.  ] 

Lord'f'Day,  Feb.  16 — •  In  the  Evening,   was  in  a  fwcet 

crnipofed  Frame  of  Mind.  It  was  exceedit)g  refrefhing  and 
ccnilortkb'e,  to  think,  thatC^od  had  been  with  me,  affordingme 
kn\^  go<  d  Meafuie  of  Aflift;:|ice.     1  then  found  Freedom  and 

Sweetnefs 


tf  Mr.  David  BrainerdJ    A.D.  1 746.     1 75 

Sweetnefs  in  Prayer  and  Thankfgiving  to  God  ;  and  found  my, 
Soul  fweetly  engaged  and  enlarged  in  Prayer  for  dear  Friends 
and  Acquaintance.  Blefled  be  the  Name  of  the  Lord,  that  ever 
I  am  enabled  to  do  any  Thing  for  his  dear  Intereft  and  Kingdom. 
Blefled  be  God  who  enables  me  to  be  faithful.  Enjoyed  more 
Refolution  and  Courage  for  God,  and  more  Refrefhment  of 
Spirit,  than  I  have  been  favoured  with  for  many  Weeks  paft. 

Monday,  Fth,  17 I  was  rcfrefhed   and   encouraged  : 

Found  a  Spirit  of  Prayer,  in  the  Evening,  and  earneft  Longings 
for  the  Illumination  and  Converfion  of  thefe  poor  Indians. 

)  [  Tuefday  Ffb,  18.     See  the  publick  Journai.} 

Wednefday,i^i?^.  19.  My  Heart  was  comforted  and  re- 

frefh'd,  and  my  Soul  fill'd  with  Longings  for  the  Converfion  of 
the  Indians  here. 

Thurfday,  Feb.  20.  -  —  ■  God  was  pleafed  to  fupport  and 
•refrcfh  my  Spirits,  by  affording  me  Aififlance,  this  Day,  a^d 
fo  hopeful  aProfpe£t  of  Succefs  ;  and  I  returned  home  rejoycing, 
and  bleffing  the  Name  of  the  Lord  ;  and  found  Freedom  and 
Sweetnefs  afterwards  in  fecret  Prayer,  and  had  my  Soul  drawn 
"  but  for  dearFriends.  Oh,  how  blefled  a  Thing  is  it,to  labour  for 
God  faithfully,  and  with  Encouragement  of  Succefs  !  Blefled 
be  the  Lord  forever  and  ever,  for  the  Afliftance  and  Comfort 
granted  this  Day. 

Friday,  Fd.  21. My  Soul  was  refrefh'd  and  comforted, 

and  I  could  not  but  blefsGod,who  had  enabled  me  in  feme  good 
Meafure  to  be  faithful  in  the  Day  paft.  Oh,  how  fweet  it  is 
to  be  fpcnt  and  worn  out  for  God  ! 

Saturday,  Fd.  22.- My  Spirits  were  much  fupported, 

tho'  my  bodily  Strength  was  much  wafted.  Oh  that  God 
would  be  gracious  to  the  Souls  of  thefe  poor  Indians. 

God  has  been  verygraciousto  me  this  Week  :  He  has  enabled  me 
to  preach  every  Day  ;  and  has  given  me  fome  Afliftance,  and 
cncouragingProfpea  of  Succefs,in  almoft  every  Sermon.  Bleffed 
be  his  Name.  Divers  of  the  white  People  have  been  awaken'd 
this  Week,  and  fundry  of  the  Indians  much  cured  of  their  Pre- 
judices and  Jealoufies  they  had  conceived  againft  Chriftianity> 
and  fome  feem  to  be  really  awaken'd. 

[  Lord's-Day,  Feb.  23.     See  the  publick  Journal. 
The  next  Day,  he  left   the  Forks  of  Delaware^  to  return  to 
Crojmekfung  5  and  fpent  the  wliole  Week  'till  Saturday,  before 

A  a  «? 


jy6      Mi,  28.  SrS^  LI  FE 

he  arrived  there  ;  but  preach'd  by  the  Way  every  Day,  except- 
ing one  ;  and  was  feveralTimes  greatiy  a/Tided  ;  and  had  much 
inward  Cdnirort,  and  earneft  Longings  to  fill  up  all  his  Time 
with  the  Service  of  God.  He  utters  fuch  Expitllions  as  thefe, 
after  Preaching  :  Oh  that  (may  he  enabled  to  plead  the  Caufe  of 
God  faithfully,  to  my  dying  Moment,  Oh  how  jweet  it  would  be 
to  fpend  my  felf  wholly  for  God,  and  in  his  Caufe y  and  to  be  freed 
frcmfe}fijh  Motives  in  my  Labours  ! 

For  Saturday  and  Lord's- Day,  March  i  &  2.  Seethe  pub- 
lick  Journal.  The  four  next  Days  were  fpent  in  great  bodily 
Weaknefs ;  but  he  fpeaks  of  fomeSeafons  of  confiderable  inward 
Comfort.] 

Thurfday,  March  6.  I  walked  alone  in  the  Evening,  and 
enjoyed  Sweetnefs  and  Comfort  in  Prayer,  beyond  what  1  have 
of  late  enjoyed  :  My  Soul  rejoyced  in  my  Pilgrimage- State,  and 
I  was  delighted  with  the  Thoughts  of  labouring  and  enduring 
Mardnefs  for  Ggd  :  Felt  foine  longing  Defires  to  preach  the 
Gofpel  to  dear  immortal  Souls ;  and  confided  in  God,  that  he 
would  be  with  me  in  my  Work,  and  that  he  never  would  leave  nor' 
for  fake  me,  to  the  End  of  my  Race.  Oh,  may  I  obtain  Mercy  of 
Godifi  be  faithful,  to  my  dying  Moment. 

Friday,  March  7.  In  the  Afternoon,  went  on  in  my  Work 
with  Freedom  and  Chearfulnefs,  God  affifting  me  ;  and  enjoyed 
Comfort  in  the  Evening. 

[  For  the  two^iext  Days,  fee  the  publick  Journal'^ 

Monday,  March  10. My  Soul  was  refrefh'd  withFree- 

dom  and  Enlargement,and  ( I  hope  )  the  livelyExercife  of  Faith, 
in  fecret  Prayer,  this  Night :  My  Will  was  fweetly  rcfigned  to 
the  divine  Will,  and  my  Hopes  refpe£ling  the  Enlargement  of 
the  dear  Kingdom  of  Chrift  fornewhat  raifed,  and  could  commit 
'Zion's  Caufe  to  God  as  his  own. 

f  On  TuefJay,  heYpeaks  of  Tome  Sweetnefs  and  Spirituality 
i  n  Chrif^ian  Converfation.  On  Wednefday,  complains  that  he 
enjoyed  not  much  Comfort  and  Satisfaaion,  thro'  the  Day, 
becaufche  did  but  little  for  God.  On  Thurfday,  fpent  confi- 
derable Time  in  Company,  on  a  fpccial  Occafion  5  but  in  Per- 
plexity, becaufe  without  favoury  religious  Converfation.  For 
Friday,  Saturday  and  Lord'?- Day,  fee  the  publick  Journal, 

In  the  former  Part  of  the  Week  following  he  was  very  ill  5 
?»nd  alfo  under   great  Dejci^ion  5  beings  as  he  apprehended, 

rcndei'd 


e>/ Mr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D    1746,     177 

reoder'd  unfervlceable  by  his  IJlnefs,  and  fearing  (bat  he  fhould 
never  be  Serviceable  any  more  ;  and  therefore  exceedingly  long- 
ed for  Death.  But  afterwards  was  more  encouraged,  and  Life 
appeared  more  defirable  ;  becaufe  (  as  he  favs  )  he  had  a  liitle 
Dawn  of  Hope,  that  he  might  be  ufeful  in  the  World.  In  ihe  latter . 
Part  of  [he  Week,  he  was  in  fome  Meafure  relieved  of  his  III- 
nefs,  in  the  Ufe  of  Means  prefcribed  by  a  Fhyfician. 

For  Saturday,  and  LordVDay,  March  22^  and  23.  See  his 
publick  journal.] 

Monday,   March  24. After  the  Indians  were  gons  to 

their  Work,to  clear  their  Lands,  I  got  alone  and  poured  out  my 
Soul  to  God,  that  he  would  fmile  upon  thefe  feeble  Beginnings, 
an<I  chat  he  would  fettle  an  Indian  Town,  that  might  be  aMoun- 
tain  of  HoJinefs ',  and  found  my  Soul  much  refrefhed  in  thefe 
Petitions,  and  much  enlarged  for  Z/on's  Intereft,  and  for  Num- 
bers of  dear  Friends  in  particular.  My  finking  Spirits  were  re- 
vived and  raifed,  and  I  felt  animated  in  the  Service  God  has 
called  me  to.  This  was  the  deareft  Hour  1  have  enjoyed  for 
many  Days,  if  not  Weeks.  1  found  an  encouraging  Hope, 
that  fomething  would  be  done  for  God,  and  that  God  would 
ufe  and  help  me  in  his  Work.  And  Oh,  how  fweet  were  the 
Thoughts  of  labouring  for  God,  when  I  felt  my  Spirit  andCourage, 
and  had  any  Hope  that  ever  1  fhould  be  fucceeded  ! 

[  The  next  Day,  his  School- Majier  was  taken  Sick  with  a 
Pleurify  ;  and  he  fpent  great  Part  of  theRemainder  of  thisWeek 
in  tending  him  :  which  in  his  weak  State  was  almoft  an  over- 
bearingBur^en  to  him  ;  he  being  obliged  conftantlyto  wait  upon 
him,  all  Day,  from  Day  toDay,and  to  lie  on  the  Floor  at  Night. 
His  Spirits  funk  in  a  conriderableDegree,wiih  his  bodily  Strength, 
under  this  Burden. 

For  Saturday,  and  Lord's- Day,  March  29,  U  30.  See  the 
publick  Journal, 

Monday,  March  31,  Towards  Night,  enjoyed  fome  fweet 
Meditations  on  thofe  Words,  It  is  good  for  ms  to  draw  near  to 
God,  My  Soul,  I  think,  had  fome  fweet  Senfe  of  what  is  in- 
tended in  thofe  Words. 

[  The  next  Day^he  was  extremely  bufy  in  tending  theSchooI- 
Mafler,  and  in  fom^  other neceffary  AfFairSjthat  greatly  diverted 
him  from  what  he  looked  upon  as  his  proper  Bafmefs :  But  yet 
fpeaks  oi  Comfort  and  Refrefhment,  at  fome  Times  of  the 

A  a  2  Wcdftcfday, 


173     JEt.  28.-  The  LIFE 

•  %Wcdnefday,  April  i.  Was  fomewhat  exerclfed  w'th  a  fpirit- 
lefs  Frame  oT  Mind.  Was  a  little  relieved  and  refiffti'd  in  the 
Evening,  with  Meditation  alone  in  the  VVoods.  But  alas,  my 
Days  pafs  away  as  rhe  Choff!  'Tis  but  little  f  do,  or  can  do, 
that  turns  to  any  Account  ;  and  *tis  my  conftant  Mifery  andBur- 
den,  that  I  am  fu  fruitlefs  in  the  Vineyard  of  the  Lord.  Oh  that 
I  were  Spirit y  that  I  might  bcaclive  for  God.  This  (  I  think  ) 
more  than  any  Thing  Q\{Qy  makes  me  lor.g,  that  this  corruptible 
might  put  on  ]nc^rruption,.xnd  this  mortal  put  on  Immjrtality.  God 
deliver  me  from  Clogs,  Fetters,and  a  Body  ofDcath^  that  impede 
my  Service  for  him. 

[  The  next  Day,  he  complains  bitterly  of  fome  Exercifes  by 
Currupiicn  he  lound  in  his  own  Heart,] 

Friday,  April  ^.  Spent  moftof  the  Day  in  writing  on  Rev. 
xxii.  17.  And  who/oever  willy  &c.  Enjoyed  fome  Freedom  and 
Encouragement  in  my  Work  ;  and  found  fome  Comfort  and 
Compofure  in  Prayer. 

Saturday,  April' ^. After  publick  Worfhip,   a  Number 

of  my  dear  Chridian  Indians  came  to  my  Houfe  ;  with  whom 
I  felt  a  fweet  Union  of  Soul  :  My  Heart  was  knit  to  them  ;  and 
I  can't  fay,  I  have  felt  fuch  a  fweet  and  fervent  Love  to  the  Bre- 
threny  for  feme  Time  paft  :  And  1  faw  in  them  Appearances  of 
the  fame  Love.  T'his  gave  me  fomething  of  a  View  of  the  hea- 
venly State  ;  and  particularly  that  Part  of  the  Happinefs  of  Hea- 
ven, which  confifts  in  the  Communion  of  Saints :  and  this  was 
afFeding  tome* 

f  For  the  two  next  Days,  fee  the  publick  Journal, 
On  Tuerjav.he  went  to  aMeeting  of  the  Prcfbytery  appointed 
at  Eli  [ah  dh  Town,  In  his  Way  thither,  he  enjoyed  fome  fweet 
Medi  ati  >ns :  But  after  he  came  there,  he  was  (  as  he  exprefTes 
ii  )  very  vspour)}  and  mdanchoiy ^  and  under  an  oiu Jul  Gloomy  that 
opprcffed  his  Mind.  And  this  continued  'till  Saturday-Evening, 
^\'heii  he  befr-^n  to  have  fume  Relief  and  Encouragement.  He 
fpent  the  Sabbath  at  Staten-IfJind  ;  where  he  preach'J  to  an 
AiTcmbly  of  Dutch  and  Engl'i/by  and  enjoyed  confiderable  Re- 
frefliment  and  Comfort,  both  in  pwblick  and  private.  In  the 
Evening,  he  returned  to  Elifabetb  Town.] 

Monday,  April  14.  My  Spirits  this  D^y  were  raifed  and  re- 
frefi-jM  an  i  my  Mind  compofed,  fo  that  \  was  in  a  comfortable 
Frame  oi  Saul,  mcTt  ©f  t»he  Day.   in  ihe  Evening,  my  Head  was 

cleafji 


tf  Mr.  David  Brainerd.      ^tk,  1 746.     1 75 

clear,  my  Mind  ferene;  I  enjoyed  Sweetnefs  in  fecretPrayer>and 
Meditation  onPfal.  Ixxiii.  28.  Oh,  how  free,how  comfortable, 
cheerful,  and  yet  folemn  do  I  feel  when  I  am  in  a  good  Meafure 
freed  from  thofe  Damps  and  melancholy  Glooms,  that  I  often 
labour  under  !  And  blefled  be  the  Lord,  I  find  my  lelf  re- 
lieved in  this  Refpedl. 

Tuefday,  jlpril  15.  My  Soul  longed  for  more  Spirituality  ; 
and  it  was  my  Burden,  that  I  could  do  no  more  for  God.  Oh, 
my  Barrennefs  is  my  daily  Affliction  and  heavy  Load  !  Oh,  how 
precious  is  Time :  and  how  it  pains  me,  to  fee  it  Hide  away, 
while  I  do  (o  very  little  to  any  good  Purpofe  !  Oh  thatGod  would 
make  me  more  fruitful  and  fpiritual. 

[  The  next  Day,  be  fpeaks  of  his  being  almoft  overwhelmed 
with  vapoury  Diforders  ;  but  yet  not  io  as  wholly  to  deftroy  the 
Compofurc  of  his  Mind.] 

Thurfday,  Jfpril  17.  Enjoyed  fome  Comfort  in  Prayer,  fome 
Freedom  in  Meditation,  and  Compofure  in  my  Studies.  Spent 
fome  Time  in  writing,  in  the  Forenoon.  In  the  Afternoon, 
fpent  fome  Time  in  Converfation  with  feveral  dear  Minifiers. 
In  the  Evening,  preached  from  P/aL  Ixxiii.  28.  But  it  is  good 
for  me  io  draw  near  to  God.  God  helped  me  to  feel  the  Truth 
of  my  Text,  both  in  the  firft  Prayer  and  \n  Sermon.  I  was 
enabled  to  pour.out  my  Soul  to  God,  with  great  Freedom,  Fer- 
vency, and  AfFedlion  :  And,  blefTed  be  the  Lord,  it  was  a  com- 
fortable Seafon  to  me.  I  was  enabled  to  fpeak  with  Tcndernefs, 
and  yet  with  Faithfulnefs :  And  divine  Truths  feemed  to  fall 
with  Weight  and  Influence  upon  the  Hearers.  My  Heart  was 
melted  for  the  dear  AfTembly,  and  I  loved  every  Body  in  it  ;  and 
fcarce  ever  felt  more  Love  to  immortal  Souls  in  my  Life  ;  my 
Soul  cried,  Oh  that  the  dear  Creatures  might  bejaved  !  Oh  that 
God  would  have  Mercy  on  them  / 

[  He  feems  to  have  been  in  a  very  comfortable  Frame  of  Mind 
the  two  next  Days.] 

Lord *£- Day,  ^/)r//  20.  %  Enjoyed  fomeFreedomjand,!  hope, 
Exercife  of  Faith  in  Prayer,  in  the  Morning  ;  efpecially  wiien 
I  came  to  pray  for  "Lion.  I  was  free  from  that  gloomy Difcour- 
agement,  that  To  often  opprelTes  my  Mind  ;  and  mySoul  rejoyc- 
ed  in  the  Hopes  of  lion's  Profperity,  an  J  the  Enlargement  of  the 
dear  Kingdom  of  the  great  Redeemer.  0\\  that  his  Kingdoxa 
might  come. — ■ — 


X  TliiDay  he  cnter'd  ifito  the  ^^ih  Year  of  his  Age 

M 


Monday, 


Monday,  Mrilii,  Was  compofed  and  comfortable  InMind, 
moft  of  theDay  :  Was  mercifully  freed  from  thofe  gloomy  Damps, 
that  I  am  frequently  exercifed  with  :  Had  Freedom  and  Com- 
fort in  Prayer,  feveral  Times  ;  efpecially  had  fome  rifing  Hopes 
of  Teton's  Enlargement  and  Profpcrity.  And  Oh,  how  refrefhing 
were  thefe  Hopes  to  my  Soul  !  Oh  that  the  Kingdom  of  the 
dear  Lord  might  come.  Oh  that  the  poor  Indiam  might  quick- 
ly be  gathered  in,  in  great  Numbers. 

Tuefday,  April  22.  My  Mind  was  remarkably  free,  thisDay, 
from  melancholy  Damps  and  Glooms,  and  animated  in  my 
Work;.  I  found/uchfrefh  Vigour  and  Refolution  in  the  Ser- 
vice of  God,  that  the  Mountains  fcem'd  to  become  a  Plain  be- 
fore me.  Oh,  blefTed  be  God  for  an  Interval  of  Refrefhment, 
and  fervent  Refolution  in  my  Lord's  Work  !  In  the  Evening, 
my  Soul  was  refrefh'd  in  fecret  Prayer,  and  my  Heart  drawn  out 
for  divine  Bleflings ;  efpecially  for  the  Church  of  God,  and  his 
Intereft  among  my  own  People,  and  for  dear  Friends  in  remote 
Places.  Oh  that  Xion  might  profper,  and  precious  Souls  be 
brought  home  to  God  ! 

[  In  this  comfortable  fervent  Frame  of  Mind  he  remained  thj 
two  next  Days. 

For  the  four  Days  next  following,  viz,  Friday,  Saturday, 
LordVDay,  and  Monday,  fee  his  publick  journal,  ■  On 

Tuefday  he  went  io  E li f abet b -Town,  to  attend  the  meeting  of 
the  Prejbytery  there  :  And  feem'd  to  fpend  the  Time,  while 
abfent  from  his  People  on  this  Oecafion,  in  a  free  and  comfort- 
abje  State  of  Mind.  ] 

Saturday,  Myy  3.  Rode  from  Eltfaheth-Town  home  to  my 
People,  at  or  near  Cranberry  ;  whither  they  are  now  removed, 
and  where,  I  hope,  God  will  fettle  them  as  a  Chriftian  Congre- 
gation. Was  refrefh'd  in  lifting  up  my  Heart  to  God,  while 
riding  ;  and  enjoyed  a  thankful  Frame  of  Spirit,  for  divine  Fa- 
vours receiv'd  the  Week  paft.  Was  fomewhat  uneafy  and 
dejed^ed,  in  the  Evening  ;  having  no  Houfe  of  my  own  to  go 
into  in  this  Place  :  But  God  was  my  Support. 

[  For  Lord's-Day  and  Monday, See  the  publick J^a-»'«a/.  ] 

Tuefday,  May  6.  Enjoy'd  fome  Spirit  and  Courage  in  my 
Work  ;  was  in  a  good  Meafure  free  from  Melancholy  :  Blefled 
be  Gcd  for  Freedom  from  this  Dtath, 

Wedncfdav, 


of  Mr.  David  Brainerd.        A.D.  1 746.    181 

Wednefday,  May  7.  Spent  moft  of  the  Day  in  writing,  as 
ufual.  Enjoyed  fome  Freedom  in  my  Work.  Was  favoured 
with  fome  comfortable  Meditations,  this  Day.  In  theEvening, 
was  in  a  fweet  compofed  Frame  of  Mind  :  Was  pleafed  and  de- 
lighted to  leave  all  with  God,  refpeding  my  fclf,  for  Time  and 
Eternity,  and  refpedling  the  People  of  my  Charge,  and  dear 
Friends  :  Had  no  Doubt  but  that  God  would  take  Care  of  me, 
and  of  his  ownlntereft  among  my  People  :  And  was  enabled  to 
ufe  Freedom  in  Prayer,  as  a  Child  with  a  tender  Father.  Oh, 
how  fweet  is  fuch  a  Frame  ! 

Thurfday,  May  8.  In  the  Evening,  was  fomewhat  refrefh'd 
with  divine  Things,  and  enjoyed  a  tender  melting  Frame  in  fe- 
cret  Prayer,  wherein  my  Soul  was  drawn  cut  for  the  Intereft  of 
Z;fl»,  and  comforted  with  the  lively  Hope  of  the  appearing  of 
the  Kingdom  of  the  great  Redeemer.  Thefe  were  fweet  Mo- 
ments:  Ifelt  almoftloth  to  go  to  Bed,  and  grieved  that  Sleep 
was  necefTary.  However,  Hay  down  with  a.  tender  reverential 
Fear  of  God,  fenfible  that  his  Favour  is  Life^  and  his  Smiles 
better  than  all  that  Earth  can  boaffc  of,  infinitely  better  than 
Life  it  felf. 

[  Friday,  May  9.  See  the  publick  Journal  ] 

Saturday,  May  10.  Rode  to  ^//^aVTiiun,  to  aflift  in  theAd- 
miniftration  of  theLord's-Supper.     In  the  Afternoon,  preach'd 
from  77/.  ii.  14.  Who  gave  him  felf  for  us^  &c.  God  was  pleafed 
to  carry  me  thro^  withfbme  Competency  of  Freedom  ;   and  yet 
to  deny  me  that  Enlargement  and  Power  I  long'd  for.     In  the 
Evening,  my  Soul  mourn'd  ,and  could  not  but  mourn,  that  I  had 
treated  fo  excellent  a  Subjedt  in  To  defective  aManner,thatI  had 
born  fo  broken  a  Teftimony  for  fo  worthy  and  glorious  a  Re- 
deemer.    And  if  myDifcourfe  had  met  with  the  utmoftApplaufe 
from  all  the  World  ( as  I  accidentally  heard  it  applauded  by  fome 
Perfons  of  Judgment  )   it  would  not  have  given  me  any  Satis- 
fadion  :  Oh,  it  grieved  me,   to  think,    that  I  had  had  no  more 
holy  Warmth  and  Fervency,  that  I   had  been  no   more  melted 
in     difcourfing    of  Chrifl's  Death,  and   the  End  and    Defign 
of  it  I   Afterwards,  enjoyed  fome  Freedom  and  Fervency  in  fe- 
cret  and  Family-Prayer,  and  longed   much    for  the  Prefence  of 
God  to  attend  his  Word  and  Ordinances  the  next  Day. 

Lord*s-Day,  May  11.  AiTified  in  the  Adminiftration  of  the 
Lord's-Supper  ;  but  enjoyed  little  Enlargement  :  Was  grieved 
and  funk  with  fome  Things  I  thought  undefirable,  ^c.  Jn  the 
Afternoon,  went  to  the  Houfe  of  God   weak  and  fick  in  Soul, 


i82      mt.  29;  ^e   LIFE 

as  well  as  feeble  in  Body  :  And  longed,  that  the  People  might 
be  entertained  and  edified  with  divine  Truths,  and  that  an  honeft 
fervent  Teftimony  might  be  born  for  God  ;  but  knew  not  how 
it  was  poflible  for  me  to  do  any  Thingof  that  Kind,  toany  good 
Purpofe.  Yet  God,  who  is  rich  in  Mercy,  was  pleafed  to  give 
me  Afliftance,  both  in  Prayer  and  Preaching  :  God  helped  me 
to  vvreftle  for  his  Prefence,  in  Prayer,  and  to  tell  him,  that  he 
had  promifed.  Where  two  or  three  are  met  together  in  his  Name^ 
there  he  would  he  in  the  midjl  of  them  ;  and  that  we  were,  at  leaft 
fome  of  us,  fo  met  ;  and  pleaded,  that  for  his  Truth's  fake  he 
would  be  with  us.  And  blefled  be  God,  it  was  fweet  to  my 
Soul,  thus  to  plead,  and  rely  on  God's  Promifes.  Difcourfed 
upon  Luke  ix.  30,  31.  And  behold^th ere  talked  with  him  twoMen^ 
tvhich  were  Mofes  and  Elias  ;  who  appeared  in  Glory^  and  fpaki 
§f  his  Deceafe^  which  he /hould accompli/}}  at]ti\x{d\Qm*  Enjoyed 
fpccialFreedom,  from  theBeginning  to  the  End  of  myDifcourfe, 
without  Interruptfon.  Things  pertinent  to  the  Subject  were 
abundantly  prefented  to  my  View,  and  fuch  a  Fulnefs  of  Mat- 
ter, that  I  fcarce  knew  how  to  difmifs  the  various  Heads  and 
Particulars  I  had  Occafion  to  touch  upon.  And,  bleffed  be  the 
Lord,  1  was  favoured  with  fome  Fervency  and  Power,  as  well  as 
Freedom  ;  fo  that  the  VVord  of  God  feem'd  to  awaken  theAt- 
tention  of  a  ftupid  Audience,  to  a  confiderable  Degree.  I  was 
inwardly  refrefh'd  with  the  Confolations  of  God  ;  and  could 
with  my  whole  Heart  fay,  Tho^  there  he  no  Fruit  in  the  Fine^Szc. 
yet  will  1  rfjoyce  in  the  Lord.  After  publick  Service,  was  refrefh'd 
with  the  fweet  Converfation  of  fome  Chriftian  Friends. 

[  The  four  next  Days  fcem  to  have  been  moftly  fpent  with 
Xpiritual  Comfort  and  Profit.  ] 

Friday,  ^l/^jy  16.  Near  Night,  enjoyed  fome  agreeable  and 
fweet  Converfation  with  a  dear  Minifter,  which,  I  truft,  was 
blefs'd  to  my  Soul  :  My  Heart  was  warmed,  and  my  Soul  en- 
gaged to  live  to  God  ;  fo  that  I  longed  to  exert  my  felf  with 
more  Vigour,  than  ever  I  had  done,  in  his  Caufe  :  And  thofe 
Words  werequickning  to  me,/i/^m«  xi  wy  Father  glorified^  that 
ye  bring  forth  much  Fruit.  Oh,  my  Soullonged,  and  wifh'd,and 
pray'cj,  to  be  enabled  to  live  to  God  with  utmoft  Conftancy  and 
Ardour  I  ip  the  Evening,  God  was  pleafed  to  (hine  upon  me  in 
fecret  Prayer,  and  draw  out  my  Soul  after  himfelf  ;  and  I  had 
Freedom  in  Supplication  for  my  felf,  but  much  more  in  Inter- 
ceffion  for  others ;  So  that  I  was  fweetly  conftrain'd  to  hy^Lord^ 

uft 


e?/ Mr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1746.     j8^ 

ufe  me  as  theu  wilt ;  do  as  thou  wilt  with  me :  But  Gh,  pro^ 
mote    thine  own  Caufe.     Z'lon  is  thine  ;  Oh  vi/tt  thine  Heritage  • 
Oh  let  thy  Kingdom  come  ;  Oh  let  thy  hlejfed  Jntete/i  be  advanced 
in  the  U'orld.     When  I  attempted    to  look  to  God,   refpet^- 
ing  my   worldly   Circumftances,    and  his  providential  Deal- 
ings with  me,  inRegard  of  my  fettling  down  in  my  Congregati- 
on, which  feems  to  be  necefTary,   and  yet  very  difficult,  and 
contrary  to  my  fix*d  Intention  for  Years  paft,  as   well  as  my 
Difpofition,  which  has  been,  and  ftill  is,  at  Times  efpecially,  to 
go  forth,  and  fpend  my  Life  in  preaching  thcGofpel  from  Place 
to  Place,  and  gathering  Souls  afar  offio  Jesus   the  great  Re- 
deemer ;  when  I  attempted  to  look  to  God  with  Regard   to 
thefe  Things,  and  hisDefigns  concerning  me,  I  could  only  fay, 
ne  l^iU  of  the  Lord   be  done  :  'Tis  no  Matter  forme.     The 
fame  Frame  of  Mind  I  felt  with  Refpe<St  to  another  importart 
Affair  I  have  lately   had  fome    ferious  Thot's  of  :  I  could  fay, 
with  utmoft  Calmnefs  and  Compofure,  Lordy  if  it  be  moft  far 
thy  Glory y  let  me  proceed  in  it  ;  hut  ifthoufeeft  that  it  will  in  any 
wife  hinder  my  Ufefulnefs  in  thy  Caufe ^  Oh  prevent  my  proceeding: 
For  all  1  waniy   refpeifing  this  Worlds   is  fuch  Circum/lances  as 
may  be/i  capacitate  me  to  do  Service  for  God  in  the  World,     Bui 
blefTed  be  God,  I  enjoyed  Liberty  in  Prayer  for  my  dear  Flock, 
and  was  enabled  to  pour  out  my  Soul  into  theBofom  of  a  tender 
Father  :  My  Heart  within   me  was  mehed,  when  [  came  to 
plead  for  my   dear  People,  and  for  the  Kingdom  of  Chtiftin 
general.  Oh,  how  fweet  was  this  Evening  to  my  Soul  I  i  knew 
Dot  how   to  go  to  Bed  ;  and   when  got  to  Bed,   longed  for 
fome  Way  to  improve  Time  for  God,  to  fome    exccllenc 
Purpofe.     Blefs  the  Lori^  O  my  SouL 

Saturday,  May  17.  Walked  out  in  the  Morning,  and  felt 
much  of  the  fame  Frame  I  enjoyed  the  Evening  before  :  Had 
my  Heart  enlarged  in  praying  for  the  Advancement  of  the 
Kingdom  of  Chrift,  and  found  utmoft  Freedom  in  leaving  ail 
my  Concerns  with  God. 

I  find  DifcQuragement  to  be  an  exceeding  Hindrance  to  my 
fpiritual  Fervency  and  AffeQion  :  But  when  God  enables  me 
fenfibly  to  find  that  I  have  done  fome  thing  for  Him^  ihis  re- 
frefhes  and  animates  me,  fo  that  I  could  break  thro'  all  Hard- 
ships, undergo  any  Labours, and  nothing  feems  too  much  eithc  r 
to  do  or  to  fuffer.  But  Oh,  what  a  Death  it  is,  to  ftiive,^i  d 
ftrive  ;  to  be  always  in  a  Hurry ^  and  yet  do  JNothivg^  or  at  le-  ft 
nothing /^r  God  I  Alas,  Alas,  that  Time  flies  away,  anc  •  do 
fo  little  for  God  ! 

B  b  Lord's  Jay, 


ig4     ^A  29;  r^^LIFE 

Lord's-Day,  May  18.  I  felt  my  own  utter  InfufHciency  for 
my  Work  :  God  made  me  to  fee,  that  I  was  TiChiid ;  ycajthat 
I  was  a  FooL  1  difcourfed,  both  Parts  of  the  Day,  from  Rev* 
iii.  20.  Behoid^  1  fttind  at  the  Door^  and  knock.  God  gave  me 
Freedom  and  Power  in  the  latter  Part  of  my  (Forenoon's)  Dif- 
courfe  ;  altho%  in  the  former  Part  of  it,  I  felt  peevifh  and  pro- 
voked with  the  unmannerly  Behaviour  of  the  white  Peop]e,wbo 
crouded  in  between  my  People  and  me  ;  which  proved  a  great 
Temptation  to  me.  But  blefTed  be  God,  Igot  thefe  Shackles 
off  before  the  middle  of  my  Difcourfe,  and  was  favoured  with 
a  fweet  Frame  of  Spirit  in  the  latterPart  of  the  Exercife  ;  was 
full  of  Love,  Warmth,  and  Tendernefs,  in  addreiTmg  my  dear 
People. In  the  Intermiffion-Seafon,  could  not  but  dif- 
courfe to  my  People  on  the  Kindnefs  and  Patience  of  Chrift  'n\ 

fianding  and  knocking  at  the  Door,  occ. In  the  Evening,  I 

was  grieved,  that  I  had  done  fo  little  forGod.     Oh  that  I  could 
be*  a  Flame  of  Fire  in  the  Service  of  my  God, 

[  Monday,  May  ig.  See  the  publick  Journal 
On  Ti/cfday  he  complains  of  Want  of  Freedom  andComfort; 
but  had  (ome  Return  of  thefe  on  Wednefday.  ] 

Thurfday,  May  22.     In  the  Evening,  was  in  aFrame  fomc- 
what  remarkable  :  Had  apprehended  for  feveral  Days  before, 
that  it  was  the  Defign  of  Providence  I  (hoM  fettle  among  my 
People  here  ;  and  had  in  my  own  Mind  begun  to  make  Pro- 
vifion  for  it,  and  to  contrive  Means  to  haften  it  ;  and  found 
my  Heart  fomething  engaged  in  it,  hoping  I  might  then  enjoy 
more  agreableCircumftances  of  Life,  in  feveral  Refpei^s  :  And 
yet  was  never  fully  determined,  never   quite  pleafed  with  the 
Thoughts  of  being  fettled  and  confined  to  one  Place.     Never- 
thelefs  1  fecm'd  to  have  fome  Freedom  in  that  Refpe£l,becaufe 
the  Congregation  I  thought  of  fettling  with,  was  one  ihat  God 
bad  enabled  me  to  gather  from  amongft  Pagans*     For  I  never 
fince  I  began  to  preach,    could  feel  any  Freedom  to  enter  into 
ether  Men's  Labours,  3i\6  fettle  down  in  the  Miniftry  where  the 
Gofps]  was  pr}ached  bffore  ;  I  never   could  make  that  appear  to 
be  my  Province  :  When  I  felt  any  Difpofition  to  confult  my 
Eafe  and  worldly  Comfort,  God  has  never  given  me  anyLiber- 
ty  in  that  Refpe^l,  either  fince,   or  for  Years  before  I  began 
to  preach.     But  God  having  fuccecded  my  Labours,  and  made 
me  inftrumental  of  gathering  a  Church  for  him  among  thefe 
Indians^  I  was  ready  to  think,  it  might  be  hisDefign  to  give  me 

a 


(?/ Mr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1746;     1^5 

a  quiet  Settlement  and  a  ftated  Home  of  my  own.  And  this, 
confid^xrtg  the  late  frequent  Sinking  and  Failure  of  my  Spirits, 
and  the  Need  I  flood  in  of  feme  agreable  Society,  and  my  great 
Defire  of  enjoying  Conveniencies  and  Opportunities  for  profi- 
table Studies,  was  not  altogether  difa^reable  to  me  :  Akho* 
I  ftill  wanted  to  go  about  far  and  wide,  in  order  to  fpread  the 
blefTed  Gofpffl  among  benighted  Souls,  far  remote  ;  yet  I  never 
had  been  fo  willing  to  fettle  in  any  one  Place, for  more  than  five 
Years  paft,  as  I  was  in  the  foregoing  Part  of  this  Week.  But 
now  thefe  Thoughts  feem'd  to  be  wholly  dafli'd  to  Pieces  ; 
not  by  Neceffity,  but  of  Choice  :  For  it  appear'd  to  me,  that 
God'sDsalings  towards  me  had  fitted  me  for  a  Life  of  Solitari- 
tiefs  ami  Hardfhip  ;  it  appeared  to  me,  I  had  nothing  to  lofe, 
oothing  to  do  with  Earth,  and  confequently  nothing  to  lofe  by 
a  total  Renunciation  of  it  :  And  it  appear'd  juft  right,  that  I 
ihould  be  deftitute  of  Houfe  and  Home,  and  many  Comforts  of 
Life,  which  I  rcjoyced  to  fee  others  of  God's  People  enjoy. 
And  at  the  fam:  Time,  I  faw  fo  much  of  the  Excellency  of 
Chrift's  Kingdom,  and  the  infinite  Defirablenefs  of  it's  Ad- 
vancement in  the  World,  that  it  fwallowed  up  all  my  other 
Thoughts  ;  and  made  me  willing,  yea,  even  rejoyce,  to  be 
made  a  Pilgrim  or  Hermit  in  the  Wildernefs,  to  my  dying 
Moment,  if  I  might  thereby  promote  the  blefTed  Intereft  of  the 
great  Redeemer.  And  if  ever  my  Soul  prefented  it  fclf  to  God 
for  his  Service,without  anyReferve  of  any  Kind,  it  did  fo  now. 
The  Language  of  my  Thoughts  and  Difpofition  (  altho'  I  fpake 
no  Words  )  now  were,  "  Here  lam^  Lord,  fend  me  ;  fend 
*'  me  to  the  Ends  of  the  Earth  ;  fend  me  to  the  rough,  the 
*«  favagc  Pagans  of  the  Wildernefs  ;  fend  me  from  all  that 
*«  is  called  Comfort  in  Earth,  or  earthly  Comfort  ;  fend  ms 
*«  even  to  Death  it  felf,  if  it  be  but  in  thy  Service,  and  to  pns- 
'■  mote  thy  Kingdom."  And  at  the  fameTime  I  had  as  quick 
and  lively  a  Senfe  of  the  Value  of  worldly  Comforts,  as  ever  I 
had  ;  bat  only  faw  them  infinitely  overmatch'd  by  the  Worth 
of  Chrift's  Kingdom,  and  the  Propagation  of  his  blefledGofpel. 
The  quiet  Settlement,  the  certain  Place  of  Abode,  the  tender 
Fnendfhip,  which  I  thought  I  might  be  likely  to  enjoy  in  Con- 
fequence  of  fuch  Circumftances,  appear'd  as  valuable  to  me^ 
confidered  abfolutely  and  in  themfelves,  as  ever  before  5  but 
confider'd  comparatively,  they  appeared  nothing  ;  Compared 
with  the  Value  and  Precioufnefs  of  an  Enlargement  of  Chrift's 
Kingdom,  they  vanifh'd  like  the  Stars  before  the  lifing  Sun. 
And  fure  I  am,  that  altho'  the  comfortable  Accommodations  of 

B  b  a  Life 


1^6     j^L  29.  fbe  LIFE 

Life  appeared  valuable  and  dear  to  me,  yet  I  did  furrender  and 
refign  my  felf.  Soul  and  Body,  to  the  Service  of  God  and  Pro- 
motion of  Chrift's  Kingdom  ;  tho'  it  (hould  be  in  t^uLofs  of 
them  all.  And  I  could  not  do  any  other,  becaufe  I  could  not 
will  or  chufe  any  other.  I  was  conft^ained,  and  yet  chofe,  to 
fay.  Farewell,  Friends  and  earthly  Comforts,  the  deareji  of  them 
alii  the  very  jdear  eft,  if  the  Lord  calls  for  it ;  Adieu,  Adieu  ;  77/ 
fpendmy  Life^  to  my  lateji  Moments,  in  Caves  and  Dens  of  the 
Earth,  if  the  Kingdom  of  Chrift  may  thereby  be  advanced,  I  found 
exiraordtnary  Freedom  at  this  Time  in  pouring  out  my  Soul  to 
God,  for  his  Caufe  ;  and  efpecially  that  his  Kingdom  might 
be  extended  among  the  Indians^  far  remote  ;  and  I  had  a  great 
and  flrong  Hope,  thatGod  would  do  it.  I  continued  wrcftling 
with  God  m  Prayer  for  my  dear  little  Flock  here  ;  and  more 
efpecially  for  the  Indians  elfewhere  ;  as  well  as  for  dearFriends 
in  one  PJact?  and  another;  *till  it  was  Bed-Time,  and  I  fear'd 
ITnould  hinoer  the  Family,  U^c.  But  Ob,  with  what  Reluc- 
tancy  did  I  find  my  felf  obliged  to  confume  Time  in  Sleep  ! 
I  longed  to  be  as  a  Flame  of  Fire,  continually  glowing  in  the 
divine  Service,  preaching  and  building  up  Chrift's  Kingdom, 
to  my  latef^,  my  dying  Moment. 

Friday,  ^4ay  23.  In  the  Morning,  was  in  the  fame  Frame 
of  Mind, as  in  the  Evening  before.  TheGlory  of  Chrifl'sKing- 
dom  fo  much  out-fhone  the  Pleafure  of  earthly  Accommodati- 
ons and  Enjoyments,  that  they  appeared  comparatively  Nothing, 
tho'  in  themfelves  good  and  defirable.  My  Soul  was  melted 
in  fecret  Meditation  and  Prayer,  and  f  found  my  felf  divorced 
from  anyPart  in  thisWorld  ;  fo  that  in  thofe  Affairs  that  feera'd 
cf  the  greateft  Importance  to  me,  in  refpedl  of  the  prcfentLife, 
and  thofe  wherein  the  tender  Powers  of  the  Mind  are  moft 
fenfibly  touch'd,  I  could  only  fay.  The  Will  of  the  Lord  be  done* 
But  juft  the  fame  Things  that  I  felt  the  Evening  before,  I  fcft 
now  ;  and  found  the  fame  Freedom  in  Prayer  for  the  People 
of  my  Charge,  for  the  Propagation  of  the  Gofpel  among  the 
Indiam^  and  for  the  Enlargement  and  fpiritual  Welfare  of  Zion 
in  general,  and  my  dear  Friends  in  particular,  now,  as  I  did 
then  ;  and  longed  to  burn  out  in  one  continued  Flame  for  God, 
RetainM  much  of  the  fame  Frame  through  the  Day.  In  the 
Evt  ning,  was  vifited  by  my  Brother  John  Brainerd:  The  firft 
Vifit  I  have  ever  received  from  any  near  Relative,  fince  I  have 
been  a  Mi/Tionary.  Felt  the  fame  Frame  of  Spirit  in  the  Even- 
jnt^,  as  in  the  Morning  ;  and  found  that  //  was  ^ood  for  mi  to 
draw  ntar  is  God,  and  leave  all  my  Concerns  and  Burdens  with 

him* 


ef  Mr.  David Brainerd.       A.D. 1 745.    j^y 

him.  Was  enlarged  and  refrefli'd  in  pouring  out  my  Soul  for 
the  Propagation  of  the  Gofpel  of  the  Redeemer  among  the 
diftant  Tribes  of  hdians.  Blefled  be  God.  If  ever  I  fill'd  up  a 
Day  with  Studies  and  Devotion,  I  was  enabled  fo  to  fill  up  this 
Day. 

Salwrday,  May  24.  Enjoyed  this  Day  fomething  of 

the  fame  Frame  of  Mind  as  I  felt  the  Day  before. 

f  Lord's-Day,  May  25.  See  the  publick  Journal 
This  Week,  at  leaft  the  former  Part  of  it,  he  was  in  a  very 
weak  State  :  but  yet  feems  to  have  hQcn  free  from  Melancholy, 
which  often  had  attended  the  failing  of  his  bodily  Strength.  He 
from  Time  to  Time  fpeaks  of  Comfort  and  inward  Refrefh- 
mcnt»  this  Week. 

Lord's-Day  June  i.  See  the  publick  ycurnah^ 

Monday,  Jung  1,  In  the  Evening,  enjoy'd  fome .  Frecdon::^ 
in  fecret  Prayer  and  Meditation. 

Tuefday,  June  3.  My  Soul  rejoyced,  early  in  the  Morning, 
to  think,  thatall  Things  wereatGod's  Difpofal.  Oh,  it  pleafed 
me,  to  leave  'em  there  !  Felt  afterwards  much  as  I  did,  on 
Thurfday  Evening,  May  22.  laft;  and  continued  in  this  Frame 
for  feveral  Hours.  Walked  out  into  the  Wildernefs,  and  en- 
joyed Freedom,  Fervency, andComfort,  in  Prayer  :  And  again 
enjoyed  the  fame  in  the  Evening. 

Wednefday,  June  4.  Spent  the  Day  in  Writing,  and  en- 
joyed fome  Comfort,  SatisfacSfcion,  and  Freedom  in  my  Work. 
In  the  Evening,  I  was  favoured  with  a  fweet  refrefhing  Frame 
of  Soul  in  fecret  Prayer  and  Meditation.  Prayer  was  now 
wholly  turned  into  Praife  ;  and  I  could  do  little  elfe  but  try  to 
adore  and  blefs  the  living  ©od  :  The  Wonders  of  his  Grace 
difplay'd  in  gathering  to  himfelf  a  Church  among  the  poor  In- 
dians here, were  the  Subje£l-Matter  of  my  Meditation,  and  the 
Occafion  of  exciting  my  Soul  to  praife  and  blefs  his  Name. 
MySoul  v/as  fcarceever  more  difpofed  to  mqu'iTQ^fj^hai  1  (hould 
render  ta  God  for  all  his  Benefits^  than  at  this  Time.  Oh,  I  was 
brought  into  a  Strait,  a  fweet  and  happy  Strait,  to  know  what 
to  do  !  1  longed  to  make  fome  Returns  to  God  ;  but  found  I 
had  nothing  to  return  :  I  could  only  rejoyce,that  God  had  done 
the  Work  himfelf ;  and  that  none  in  Heaven  or  Earth  might 
pretend  to  {hare  the  Honour  of  it  with  him  ;  I  could  only  be 
glad,  that  God's  declarative  Glory  was  advanced  by  the  Con- 
rsfiion'of  thcfe  SquIs,  and  that  it  was  to  the  Enlargement  of 

his 


i88  ^L  25:  yjtf  L  I  F  E 

his  Kingdom  in  the  World  :  But  faw  I  was  fo  poor,  that 
I  had  nothing  to  offer  to  him.  My  Soul  and  Body , thro'  Grace, 
I  could  chearfully  furrender  to  him  :  But  it  appeared  to  me, 
this  was  rather  a  Cumber,  than  a  Gift  :  And  nothing  could  I  do 
to  glorify  his  dear  and  bleffed  Name.  Yet  I  was  glad  at  Heart, 
that  he  was  unchangeably  poflefTed  of  Glory  and  Bleflednefs, 
Oh  that  he  might  be  adored  and  praifed  by  all  his  intelligent 
Creatures,  to  the  utmoft  of  their  Powers  and  Capacities.  My 
Soul  would  have  rejoyced  to  fee  others  praifc  him,  tho*  I  could 
do  nothing  towards  it  my  felf. 

'  [  The  next  Day,  he  fpeaks  of  his  being  fubjedl  to  fomeDc^ 
gree  of  Melancholy  ;  but  of  being  fomething  relieved  in  the 
Evening. 

Friday,  'June  6.  See  the  publick  Journal.  ] 

Saturday,  ^une  7. •  Rode  to  FreehoU^  to  affift  Mr.  7>.l- 

nent  in  the  Adminiftratioa  of  the  Lord's  Supper.  In  the  Af- 
ternoon, preaeh'd  from  Pf<iL  Ixxiii.  28.  God  gave  me  Tome 
Freedom  and  Warmth  in  my  Difcourfe  ;  and  I  truft,  his  Pre- 
fcnce  was  in  the  Aflembly.  Was  comfortably  compofed,  and 
enjoyed  a  thankful  Frame  of  Spirit ;  and  my  Soul  was  grieved, 
that  I  could  not  render  fomething  toGod  forhisBencfits  befloW- 
ed.     Oh  that  1  could  be  fwallowed  up  in  his  Praife  ! 

Lord's  Day,  y;w«^8.  Spent  much  Time,  in  the  Morning, 
in  fecret  Duties ;  but  between  Hope  and  Fear,  refpedling  the 
Enjoyment  of  God  in  the  Bufinefs  of  the  Day  then  before  as. 
"Was  agreeably  entertained, in  theForenoon,by  aDifcourfe  from 
Mr.  7>w«^«/,  and  felt  fomewhat  melted  and  refrefh'd.  In  the 
Seafon  of  Communion,  enjoyed  feme  Comfort ;  and  efpccially 
in  ferving  one  of  the  Tables.  BlefTed  be  the  Lord,  it  was  a 
^Time  of  Refrejhing  to  me,  and  I  truft,  to  many  others.  A 
Number  of  my  dear  People  fat  down  by  themfelves  at  the 
laft  Table  j  at  which  Time  God  feem'd  to  be  in  the  midft  of 
them.—  And  the  Thoughts  of  what  God  had  done  among 
them  were  refrefhing  &  melting  to  me.  In  theAfternoon,God 
enabled  me  to  preach  with  uncommon  Freedom,  from  2  Cor,v, 
20.  Thro' the  great  Goodnefs  of  God,  I  was  favoured  with  a 
conftant  Flow  of  pertinent  Matter, and  propcrExpreirions,from 
the  Beginning  to  the  End  of  my  Difcourfe.  in  the  Even- 
ing, I  could  not  but  rejoice  in  God,  and  blefs  him  for  the  Mani- 
feftations  of  his  Grace  in  the  Day  paft.  Oh,  it  was  a  fwcet  and 
folcmn  Day  and  Evening  !  A  Seafon  of  Comfort  to  the  Godly, 

2nd 


of  Mr.  David  Brainerd,    A.D.  1745J      189 

and  of  Awakning  to  fome  Souls.  Oh  that  I  could  praifc  the 
Lord, 

Monday,7«»tf  g.Enjoy'd  fomeSweetnefs  infecrctDu!ics.— — ; 
Preached  the  concluding  Sermon  from  Gen,  v.  24.  And  Enoch 
walked  with  God,  &c.  God  gave  me  Enlargement  and  Fer- 
vency in  my  Difcourfe  ;  fo  that  I  was  enabled  to  fpeak  with 
Plainnefs  and  Power  ;  and  God's  Prefence  fecm'd  to  be  in  the 
AfTembly.  Praifed  be  the  Lord,  it  was  a  fweet  Meeting,  a 
defirable  AfTembly.  I  found  my  Strength  renewed,and  length- 
ened out,  even  to  a  Wonder ;  fo  that  I  felt  much  ftronger  at 
the  Conclufion,  than  in  the  Beginning  of  this  Sacramental  So- 
lemnity. I  have  great  Reafon  to  blefs  God  for  this  Solemnity, 
whereio  I  have  found  Affiftance  in  addreflingothers^andSweet- 
i|ef»in  my  own  Soul. 

[OnTuefday,  he  found  himfelf  fpent,  and  his  Spirits  exhaufl- 
ed  by  his  late  Labours  ;  and  on  Wednefday,  complains  of  va- 
poury Diforders,  and  Dcjedtion  of  Spirit,  and  of  enjoying  but 
little  Comfort  or  Spirituality.  ] 

Thurfday,  ^une  12.  In  the  Evening,  enjoyed  Freedom  of 
Mind,  and  fome  Sweetnefs  in  fecret  Prayer :  It  was  a  defirable 
Seafon  to  me  ;  my  Soul  was  enlarged  in  Prayer  foi  my  own 
dear  People,  and  for  the  Enlargement  of  Chrift'sKingdom,and 
efpccially  for  the  Propagation  of  theGofpel  among  the  Indiani^ 
back  in  the  Wildernefs.  Was  refrefh'd  in  Prayer  for  d§ar 
Friends  in  New-England^  and  elfewhere  :  I  found  it  fweet  to 
pray  at  this  Time  ;  and  could  with  all  my  Heart  fay,  Itij  good 
for  me  to  draw  near  to  God, 

Friday,  June  13. 1  came  away  from  the  Meeting  of 

the  Indians^  this  Day,  rejoycing  and  blefling  God  for  his  Grace 
manifefted  at  this  Seafon. 

Saturday,  June  14.  Rode  to  Kingflon^  to  aflift  the  Rev.  Mr. 
Wahi  in  the  Adminift ration  of  the  Lord's  Supper.  In  the  Af- 
ternoon, preached  ;  but  almoft  fainted  in  the  Pulpit :  Yet  God 
ftrengthen*d  me  when  I  was  juft  gone,  and  enabled  me  to  fpeak 
his  Word  with  Freedom,  Fervency  and  Application  to  theCon- 
fcience.  And  praifed  be  theLord  ;  Out  ofweaknefs  J  was  made 
Jirong,  I  enjoyed  fome  Sweetnefs,  in  and  after  publickWorfhip; 
but  was  extreamly  tired.  Oh,  how  many  are  the  Mercies  of  the 
Lord  !  To  them  that  hove  no  Mighty  he  incre'^feih  Strength. 

Lord's- Day,  June  15.  Was  in  a  deje£led  fpiritlefs  Frame, 
that  I  could  not  hold  up  my  Head,  nor  look  any  Body  in  the 

•  Face, 


190    /S/.  29.  Til?  LIFE 

Face.  Adminiftred  the  Lord's-Supper  at  Mr.  WaUi*^  DefircJ 
And  found  my  felf  in  a  good  Meafure  unburdened  and  relieved 
of  my  prefling  Load,  when  I  came  to  afk  a  Bleffing  on  theEle- 
ments :  Here  God  gave  me  Enlargement,  and  a  tender  affco^ 
tionate  Senfe  of  fpirltualThings ;  fo  that  it  was  aSeafon  ofCom- 
fort,  in  fome  Meafure,  to  me,  and  I  truft,more  fo  to  others.  In 
the  Afternoon,  preach'd  to  a  vaft  Multitude,  from  Rev.  xxii. 
17.  And  whofoever  willy  Uc,  God  helped  me  toofFera  Tefti- 
mony  for  himfelf,  and  to  leave  Sinners  inexcufable  in  negledting 
his  Grace.  I  was  enabled  to  fpeak  with  fuch  Freedom,  Fluen- 
cy, and  Clearnefs,  as  commanded  the  Attention  of  the  Great. 
Was  extreamly  tired,  in  the  Evening,  but  enjoyed  Compofure 
and  Sweetnefs. 

Monday,  June  16.  PreachM  again  ;  and  God  helped  me 
amazingly,  fo  that  this  was  a  fweet  refrefliing  Seafon  to  my  Soul 
and  others.  Oh,  forever  bleffed  be  God  for  Help  afforded  at 
this  Time,  when  my  Body  wasfo  weak,  and  while  there  was 
fo  large  an  AfTembly  to  hear.  Spent  the  Afternoon  in  a  com"* 
for  table  agreable  Manner. 

[  The  next  Day  was  fpent  comfortably. 

On  Wednefday,  he  went  to  a  meeting   of    Minifters    at 

EopewilL 

Thurfday,  June  19.  See  his  publick  Journal,  * 
On  Friday  and  Saturday,  he  was  very  much  amifs ;  but  yet 
preach'd  to  his  People  on  Saturday.  His  Ilinefs  continued  on 
theSabbaih;  but  he  preach'd,  notwithftanding,  to  his  People, 
both  Parts  of  the  Day  :  And  after  the  publick  Worfhip  was 
ended,  he  endeavoured  to  apply  divine  Truths  to  the  Confcien- 
ces  of  fome,  and  addrefs'd  them  perfonally  for  that  End  :  Se- 
veral were  in  Tears,  and  fome  appeared  much  afFedled,  But 
he  was  extremely  wearied  with  the  Services  of  the  Day,  and 
was  foill  at  Night,  that  he  could  have  no  bodily  Reft  ;  but  re- 
marks, that  God  was  his  Support ^  and  that  he  was  mt  left  defti' 
iute  of  Comfort  in  him.  On  Mtjnday,  he  continued  very  111 ;  but 
fpeaks  of  his  Mind's  being  calm  and  compofed,  refigned  to  the 
divine  DiTpenfations,  and  content  with  his  feeble  State.  And 
by  the  Account  he  gives  of  himfelf,  the  remaining  Part  of  this 
Week,  he  continued  very  feeble,and  for  the  moft  Part  dejeded 


The  publick  Journal  that  has   been  fo  often  refcr'd  iOf 
^ncludjfj  wiib  the  Accpuniof  this  Day. 

in 


(?/ Mr.  David  Braiflerd.         AX),iy^6,    191 

ed  in  Mind,  and  enjoy'd  no  great  Freedom  nor  Sweetnefs  in 
fpiritual  Things  ;  excepting  that  for  feme  very  fhort  Spaces  of 
Time  he  had  Refrcfhment  and  Encouragement,  which  engaged 
bis  Heart  on  divine  Things ;  and  fometimes  his  Heart  was 
xneited  with  fpiritual  AiFedion.  ] 

Lord  VDay,  Jum  29.  Preach'd,  both  Parts  of  the  Dayjfrom 
yoh,  xiv.  ip  Tft  a  little  while^  and  the  World  feeth  me  no  morcy 
&c.  God  was  plcafed  to  ailift  me,  to  afford  me  both  Freedom 
and  Power  ^  efpecially  towards  the  clofe  of  nay  Difcourfes^both 
Forenoon,  and  Afternoon.  God's  Power  appear'd  in  the  Af- 
fembly,  in  both  Exercifes.  Numbers  of  God's  People  were 
rc/refh'd  and  melted  with  divine  Thmgs  ;  ono  or  two  comfort- 
ed, who  had  been  long  under  Diftrefs  :  Convictions,  in  divers 
Inftances,  powerfully  revived  ;  and  one  Man  in  Years  much 
awaken'd,  who  had  not  long  frequented  our  Meeting,  and  ap- 
pear'd before  as  ftupid  as  a  Stock.  God  amazingly  renewed  and 
lengthen'd  out  my  Strength.  J  was  fo  fpent  at  Noon,  that  I 
could  fcarcewalk,  and  all  my  Joints  trembled  ;  fo  that  I  could 
not  fit,  nor  fo  much  as  bold  my  Hand  ftrll  :  And  yet  God 
ftrengihned  me  to  preach  with  Power  in  the  Afternoon  j  aliho' 
I  had  given  out  Word  to  my  People,  that  I  did  not  exped  to  be 
able  to  do  it.  Spent  fome  Time  afterwards  in  converfing, 
particularly,  with  feveral  Perfons,  about  their  fpiritual  State  ; 
and  had  fome  Satisfaction  concerning  one  or  two.  Pray'd  af- 
terwards with  a  fick  Child,  and  gave  a  Word  ot  Exhortation. 
Was  aiTifled  in  all  my  Work.  BlefTed  be  God.  Returned 
home  with  more  Health,  than  I  went  out  with  ;  altho  my  Lin- 
nen  v/as  wringing  wet  upon  me,  from  a  little  after  ten  in  the 
Morning,  'till  paft  five  in  the  Afternoon.  My  Spirits  alfo  were 
confidefably  refrefh'd  ;  and  my  Soul  rejoiced  in  Hope,  that  I 
bad  through  Grace  done  fomething  for  God.  In  theEvening, 
•walked  out,  and  enjoyed  a  fweet  Seafon  in  fecret  Prayer  and 
Praife.  But  Oh,  I  found  the  Truth  of  the  Pfalmif^^  Words, 
jyiy  Goodnefi  extendeih  not  io  Thee  J  I  could  not  make  any  Re- 
turns to  God  :  I  longed  to  five  only  to  Him, and  to  be  in  Tune 
for  his  Praife  and  Service  forever.  Oh,  for  Spirituality  and 
holy  Fervency,  that  I  might  fpend  and  befp^nt  for  God,  to  my 
lateft  Moment  I 

Monday,  June  30.  Spent  the  Day  in  writing  ;  but  under 
much  Weaknefs  and  Diforder.  Felt  the  Labours  of  the  pre- 
ceeding  Day  ;  altho'  my  Spirits  were  fo  refrefh'd  the  Evening 
before,  that  I  was  not  not  then  fenfible  oi  my  being  fpent. 

C  c  Tuefday, 


192     Mu  29;  W^  L I F  E 

Tuefday,  July  I.  In  the  Afternoon,  vifited,  and  preach'd  to 
my  People,  from  Heh.  ix.  27.  on  Occafion  of  fome  Perfons 
jying  at  the  Point  of  Death,  in  my  Congregation.  God  gave 
me  fome  AfTiftance  ;  and  his  Word  made  fome  Impreffions  on 
the  Audience,  in  general.  This  was  an  agreable  and  com- 
fortable Evening  to  my  Soul :  My  Spirits  were  fomewhat  re- 
frefh'd  ,  with  a  fmall  Degree  of  Freedom  and  Help  enjoyed  in 
my  Work.  '^ 

[  On  Wednefday,  he  went  to  Newarh^  to  a  Meeting  of  the 
Prejhyteiy  :  Complains  of  lownefs  of  Spirits ;  and  greatly  la- 
ments his  fpending  his  Time  fo  unfruitfully.  The  remaining 
Part  of  the  Week  he  fpent  there,  and  at  Elifabeth-Town  ;  and 
/peaks  of  Comfort  and  divine  Afliftance,  from  Day  to  Day  : 
But  yet  greatly  complains  for  want  of  more  Spirituality.  ] 

Lord's-Day,  July  6.  [  At  EUfaheth-Town  ]  Enjoyed  fome 
Compofure  and  Serenity  of  Mind,  in  the  Morning :  HeardMr. 
Dicktnjon  preach,  in  the  Forenoon,  and  was  refrefh'd  wit^.  his 
Difcourfe  j  was  in  a  melting  Frame  ,  fome  Part  of  the  Time 
of  Sermon  :  Partook  of  the  Lord's- Supper,  and  enjoyed  fome 
Senfe  of  divine  Things  in  that  Ordinance.  In  the  Afternoon,  I 
preach'd  from  E%ek.  xxxiii.  11.  As  llive^  faith  th$  Lord  God^ 
Uc,  God  favcur'd  me  with  Freedom  andFcrvency  ;  and  help- 
ed me  to  plead  his  Caufe,  beyond  my  own  Power. 

Monday,  jfuly  7.  My  Spirits  were  confiderably  refrefti'd  and 
raifed,  in  the  Morning.  There  is  no  Comfort,  I  find,  in  any 
Enjoyment,  without  enjoying  God  and  being  engaged  in  his 
Service.  In  the  Evening,  had  the  moft  agreeable  Converfation 
that  ever  I  remember  in  all  my  Life,  upon  God's  being  all  in 
all,  and  all  Enjoyments  being  jufl  thtt  to  us  which  God  makes 
them,  and  no  more.  ^Tis  good  to  begin  and  end  with  G0D4 
Oh,  how  does  a  fweet  Solemnity  lay  a  Foundation  for  true 
Pleafure  and  Happinefs  ! 

Tuefday,  jfuly  8.  Rode  home,  and  enjoyed  fome  agreeable 
Meditations  by  the  Way. 

Wednefday,  July  9.  Spent  the  Day  in  writing,enjojedfome 
Comfort  and  Refrefliiment  of  Spirit  in  my  Evening-Retirement. 

Thurfday,  July  10.  Spent  moft  of  theDay  in  writing.  To- 
wards Night,  rode  to  Mr.  Tenmnt's  ;  enjoyed  fome  agreeable 
Converfation  :  Went  home,  in  the  Evening,  in  afolemn  fweet 
Frame  of  Mind  ;  was  refrefn'd  in  fecret  Duties,  longed  to  live 
wholly  and  only  fcr  God,  and  fav/  plainly,  there  was  nothing  in 

the 


•/Afr.  David  Brainerd.     AD.  174(5.     193 

the  World  worthy  of  myAfFc£lion  ;  fo  that  mv  Heart  was  dead 
to  all  below  ;  yet  not  thro'  Dejection  as,  at  feme  Times,  but 
from  Views  of  a  better  Inheritance. 

Friday,  July  ii»  Was  in  a  calm  compofed  Frame,  in  the 
Morning,  efpecially  in  the  Seafon  of  my  fecret  Retirement  :  i 
thinkjl  was  wellpleafed  with  the  Will  of  Godjwhatever  it  was, 
or  ihould  be,  in  all  Refpefls  I  had  then  any  Thought  of.  Intend- 
ing  toadminifter  theLordVSupper  the  nextLord'sDay,!  lookM 
to  God  for  his  Prefeuce  and  Ailiftance  upon  that  Occalion  ;  but 
felt  a  Difpofition  to  fay.  The  Will  of  the  Lord  be  done,  whether 
it  be  to  give  me  Afliftancc,  or  not.  Spent  fome  little  Time  in 
•writing  :  Vifited  the  Indians^  and  fpent  fume  Time  in  ferious 
Converfation  with  them  ;  thinking  it  not  beft  to  preach,  by 
Reafcn  that  many  of  them  were  abfent. 

Saturday,  July  12.  This  Day  was  fpent  in  Faffing andPray- 
er  by  my  Congregation,  as  preparatory  to  the  Sacrament.  I 
difcourfed,  both  Parts  of  the  Day,  from  Rom.  iv.  25.  Who  was 
delivered  for  our  Offences,  &c.  God  gave  me  fome  AiTiflance  \n 
my  Difcourfes,  and  fomething  of  divine  Power  attended  the 
Word  ;  fothat  this  was  an  agreeable  Seafon.  Afterwards  \zd 
.them  to  a  folemn  Renewal  of  theirCovenant,  and  freihDedica- 
tion  of  themfelves  to  God.  This  was  a  Seafon  both  of  Solemni- 
ty and  Sweetnefs,  and  God  feem'd  to  be  in  the  inidjl  of  uu  Re- 
turt)ed  to  my  Lodgings,  in  theEvening,  in  a  comfortableFrame 
of  Mind. 

Lord's-Day,  July  i^'  In  the  Forenoon,  difcourfed  on  the 
Bread  of  Life,  from  Joh,  vi.  35.  God  gave  me  fomeAiliftance, 
in  Part  of  my  Difcourfe  efpecially;  and  there  appeared  fome 
tender  AfFedlion  in  the  Allembly  under  divine  Truths  ; 
my  Soul  alfo  wasfomewhat  rcfrefh*d.  Adminiftred  the  Sacra- 
ment of  the  Lord's  Supper  to  thirty-one  Perfons  of  the  Indians.. 
God  feem'd  to  be  prefent  in  this  Ordinance  ;  the  Communi- 
cants were  fweetly  melted  and  refrefh'd,  molt  of  them.  Ob, 
how  they  melted, even  when  theElements  were firft  uncovered  \ 
There  was  fcarcely  adry  Eye  amongft  them,  when  I  took  off 
the  Linnen,  and  fliewed  thena  the  Symbols  of  Christ's  broken 

Body, Having  refted  a  little,  after  the  Adminiflration  of 

the  Sacrament,  I  vifited  the  Communicants,  and  found  them 
generally  in  a  fweet  loving  Frame  ;  not  unlike  what  appear'd 
among  them  on  the  former  SacramentalOccafion,  on  Jpril  27. 
In  the  Afternoon,  difcourfed  upon  coming  to  Christ,  and  the 
SatiifaSHonoA  thofe  who  do  fo,  from  the  fameF^r/^  I  infifted  on 
iii  the  Forenoon,    This   was  likcwifean  agreeabls  Seafon ,   a 

C  c  2  SeafDfi 


194    ^^-  29;  ^he  LIFE 

Seafon  of  much  Tendernefs,  AfFe6lIon  and  Enlargement  in  di- 
vine Service  :  And  God,  I  am  perfwaded,crown'd  ourAfTembly 
with  his  divine  Prefence.  I  returned  home  much  fpent,  yet 
rejoicing  in  the  Goodnefs  of  God. 

Monday,  Juiy  14.  Went  to  my  People,  and  difcourfed  to 
them  ixomPfal  cxix  106.  1  hovg  fworn^and  I  wiil perform  it, Sic, 
Obferved,  i.  That  ail  God's  "JudgmenU  or  Commandments 
2.x t  righteous.  2.  That  God's  People  have /«;<?r«  Ko  keep  them  ; 
and  this  they  do  efpecially  at  the  Lord's  Table.  There  appeared 
to  be  a  powerful  divine  Influence  on  the  AflemWy,  and  conli- 
derable  melting  under  the  Word.  Aftcrvv^ard^,  1  led  them  to 
a  Renewal  of  their  Covenant  before  God  (  that  they  would 
watch  over  themfelves  and  one  another,  left  they  fhould  fall 
into  Sin,,  and  difhonour  the  Name  of  Chrift )  juft  as  I  did  oa 
Monday  yf/)r// 28.  Tais  Tranfadion  was  attended  with  great 
Solemnity  :  And  God  feem'd  to  own  it  by  exciting  in  them  a 
Fear  and  Jealoufy  of  themfelves,  left  they  fhould  Sin  againft 
God  ;  fo  that  the  Prefence  of  God  feem'd  to  be  amongft  us  in 
this  Conclufion  of  the  Sacramental  Solemnity. 

[  The  next  Day,  he  fet  out  on  a  Journey  towards  Philadel" 
phia  ;  from  whence  he  did  not  return  'till  Saturday.  He  went 
this  Journey,  and  fpcnt  the  Week,  under  a  great  Degree  of 
lilnefs  of  Body,  and  Dtjcdion  of  Mind.] 

Lord's- Day,  ywy  20.  Preach 'd  twice  to  my  People,  from 
^oh.  xvii.  24.  Father,  1  will  that  they  alfo  whom  ihou  haft  given 
me,  he  with  trie,  where  1  am,  that  they  may  behold  my  Glory,  which 
thou  haft  given  me.  Was  helped  to  difcourfe  with  great  Clear- 
nefs  and  Plainnefs  in  thePorenooB.  In  the  Afternoon,  enjoy'd 
fome7>ndernefs,  and  fpake  with  fome  Influence.  Divers  were 
in  Tears  ;  and  fome,  to  Appearance,  in  Diftrefs. 

Monday  y^/y  21.  Preach'd  to  xht  Indians,  chiefly  for  the 
fake  of  fome  Strangers.  Then  propofed  my  Defign  of  taking  a 
Journey  fpeedily  ioSuJquahannah  :  Exhorted  my  People  to  pray 
for  mc,  that  God  would  be  with  me  in  thatjourney,  ^c.  Then 
chofe  divers  Perfons  of  the  Congregation  to  travel  with  me. 
Afterwards,  fpcnt  Time  in  difcourling  to  the  Strangers, and  was 
fomewhat  encouraged  with  them.  Took  Care  of  my  People's 
fecular  Bufinefo,  and  was  not  a  little  exercifed  with  it.  Had 
fpme  Degree  of  Compofure  and  Comfort  in  fecret  Retirement. 

TucfJay,  Ju/y  22.  Was  in  a  deje6ted  Frame,  moft  of  the 
Pay  :  Wanted  to  wear  out  Life, and  have  it  at  anEnd  ;  but  bad 
feme  Defires  of //W^tf-/^?  Gopjand  wearing  out  lAi^fgr  him»  0\i 
Ithat  i  ^ould  i;idced  do  To  ! 

rxh^ 


of  Mr,  David  Brainerd.      A.D. i y^6,     igs 

[The  nextDay,  he  went  to  Elijah eth-1  own ^  to  a  Meeting  of 
the  Prefbytery  \  and  fpent  this,  and  Thurfday,  and  the  former 
Part  of  Friday,  under  a  very  great  Degree  o\  Melancholy,  and 
exceed ingGloominefs  of  Mind  ;  not  through  anyFear  of  future 
Punifhment,  butas  being  diftrefTed  with  a  Scnfelefnefs  of  all 
Good,  fo  that  the  whole  World  appeared  empty  and  gloomy  to 
him.  Bur,  in  the  latter  Part  of  Friday,  he  was  greatly  relievM 
and  comforted.] 

Saturday,  July  26.  Was  comfor.table  in  the  Morning  ;  my 
Countenance  and  Heart  were  not  fad,  as  in  Days  paft  ;  enjoyM 
fome  Sweetnefs  in  lifting  up  my  Heart  toGod.  Rode  Home  to 
my  People,  and  was  in  a  comfortable  pleafant  Frame  b/  the 
Way  i  my  Spirits  were  much  relieved  of  their  Burden,  and  I 
felt  free  to  go  through  all  Di faculties  and  Labours  in  my  Ma- 
iler's Service. 

Lord  V Day,  y^^jK  27.  Difcourfed  to  my  People,in  theFore- 
noon,  from  Luke  xii.  37.  on  the  Duty  and  Benefit  of  watch- 
ing :  God  helped  me  in  the  latter  Part  of  my  Difcourfe,  and 
the  Power  of  God  appeared  in  the  AfTembly.  In  the  Afternoon, 
difcourfed  from  Luke  xiii.  25.  Here  alfo  I  enjoyed  fome  AfEft- 
ance,  and  the  Spirit  of  God  feemed  to  attend  what  was  fpoken, 
fo  that  there  was  a  great  Solemnity,  and  fome  Tears  among  In- 
dians and  others. 

Monday,  July  28.  Was  very  weak,  and  fcarce  able  to  per- 
form any  Bufinefs  at  all ;  but  enjoyed  Sweetnefs  and  Comfort  in 
Prayer,  both  Morning  and  Evening  ;  and  was  compofed  and 
comfortable  thro'  the  Day  :  My  Mind  was  intenfe,  and  my 
Heart  fervent,  at  leaft  in  fome  Degree,  in  fecret  Duties  j  and 
I  longed  io  Jpend  and  be  fpent  for  God. 

Tuefday,  y^/y  29.  My  Mind  was  chearful,  and  free  from 
thofe  melancholy  Damps,  that  I  am  often  exercifed  with  :  Had 
Freedom  in  looking  up  to  God,  at  fundry  Times  in  the  Day. 
In  the  Evening,  I  enjoyed  a  comfortable  Seafon  in  fecretPrayer ; 
was  help'd  to  plead  with  God  for  my  own  dear  People,  that  he 
would  carry  on  his  own  bleffed  Work  among  them  ;  was  afTifted 
alfo  in  praying  for  the  divinePrefencc  to  attend  me  in  my  intend- 
ed Journey  to  Sufquahannah  ;  was  alfo  helped  to  remember 
dear  Brethren  and  Friends  in  New- England  :  fcarce  knew  how 
fo  leave  the  Throne  of  Grace,  and  it  grieved  me  that  I  was 
obliged  to  go  to  Bed  ;  I  longed  to  do  fomething  for  God,  but 
knew  not  how*  jBIefled  be  God  for  this  Freedom  from  De- 
jection* 

Wednefday^ 


1^6    mt.  29;         nt  LIFE 

Wcdncfday,  Jul^  30.  Was  uncommonly  comfortable, both 
in  Body  and  Mind  ;  in  the  Forenoon  efpecially  :  My  Mind  was 
folemn,  I  was  afiifted  in  my  Work,  and  God  feem'd  to  be  near 
to  me  ;  fo  that  the  Day  was  as  comfortable  as  moft  I  have  en- 
joyed for  fome  Time.  In  the  Evening,  was  favoured  with 
Afliftance  in  fecret  Prayer,  and  felt  much  as  I  did  the  Evening 
before.  BlefTed  be  God  for  that  Freedom  I  then  enjoyed  at  the 
Throne  of  Grace,  for  my  felf,  my  People  and  my  dear  Friends. 
It  is  goad  for  me  to  draw  near  to  God, 

[  He  feems  to  have  continued  very  much  in  the  fame  free, 
comfortable  State  of  Mind  the  next  Day.] 

Friday,  Augujl  i.  In  the  Evening,  enjoyed  a  fweet  Seafon 
in  fecret  Prayer;  Clouds  of  Darknefs  and  perplexing  Care 
were  fweetly  fcatter'd,  and  nothing  anxious  remain'd.  Ob, 
how  ferene  was  my  Mind  at  this  Seafon  I  How  free  from  that 
diftrafting  Concern  I  have  often  felt  I  Th  Will  he  done^  was  a 
Petition  fweet  to  my  Soul  ;  and  if  God  had  bidden  me  chufe 
for  my  felf  in  any  Affair  ;  I  fhould  have  chofen  rather  to  have 
refer'd  the  Choice  to  him ;  for  I  faw  he  was  infinitely  wife, 
and  could  not  do  anyThing  amifs,  as  I  was  in  Danger  of  doing. 
Was  afTifted  in  Prayer,  for  my  dear  Flock, that  God  would  pro- 
mote his  own  Work  among  them^  and  that  God  would  go  with 
me  in  my  intended  Journey  to  Sufquohannah  ;  was  helped  to 
remember  dear  Friends  in  New-  England,  and  my  dear  Brethren 
in  the  Miniftry,  1  found  enough  in  the  fweet  Duty  of  Prayer  to 
have  engaged  me  to  continue  in  it  the  whole  Night,  would  my 
bodily  State  have  admitted  of  it.  Oh,  how  fweet  it  is,  to  be 
enabled  heartily  to  fay,  Lord^not  my  Will,  hut  thine  be  done  / 

Saturday,  Aug.  2.  Near  Night,  preach'd  frohiMatih,  xl.  29. 
Was  confiderably  helped  ;  and  the  Prefence  of  God  feem'd  to 
be  fomewhat  remarkably  in  the  Aflembly  ;  divine  Truths  made 
powerful  ImprefTions,  both  upon  Saints  and  Sinners.  Blefled 
be  God  for  fuch  a  Revival  among  us.  In  the  Evening,  was 
very  weary,  but  found  my  Spirits  fupported  and  refrefti'd. 

Lord's-Day,  Aug.  3.  Difcourfed  to  my  People,  in  the  Fore- 
noon, from  Colof.  iii.  4.  Obferved,  that  Cbri^  is  the  Believer's 
Life.  God  helped  me,  and  gave  me  his  Prefence  in  this  Dif- 
courfe  ;  and  it  was  a  Seafon  of  confiderable  Power  In  iheAfTem- 
bly.  In  the  Afternoon,  preach'd  from  Lukexix  41,  42.  I  en- 
joyed fome  Affif^ance  ;  tho*  not  fo  much  as  in  the  Forfenoon. 
in  the  Evening,  I  enjoyed  Freedom  and  Swcetnefs  in   fecret 

Prayer  ^ 


of  Mr.  David  BrainerdJ     A.D.  1746,     j^j 

Prayer  5  God  enlarged  my  Heart,  freed  me  from  melancholy 
Damps,  and  gave  me  Satista6lion  in  drawing  neat  to  himfelf. 
Oh  that  my  Soul  could  magnify  the  Lord,  for  thefe  Seafoii?  of 
Compofure  and  Refignation  to  his  Will. 

Monday,  Jug»  4.  Spent  the  Day  in  writing  ;  enjoyed  mach 
Freedom  and  AlTiftance  m  my  Work  :  Was  in  a  compofed  and 
comfoitableFrame,moft  of  the  Day  ;  and  in  theEvening  enjoy- 
ed fome  Swcetnefs  in  Prayer.  BlelTed  be  God,mySpirits  were 
yet  up,  and  J  was  free  from  fmkins:  Damps ;  as  I  have  been  in 
general  ever  fince  I  came  from  EUfabetb-Town  laft.  Oh  what  a 
Mercy  is    this  ! 

Friday,  ^k^.  5.  Towards  Night,  preach'd  at  the  Funeral 
of  one  of  my  Chriftians,  from  Ifai,  Ivii.  2.  Was  opprefled  with 
the  nervous  Head-Ach,  and  confiderably  dejected  :  However, 
had  a  little  Freedom,  fome  Part  of  the  Time  I  was  difcourfing. 
Was  extreamly  weary  in  the  Evening;  but  notwithftanding 
enjoyed  fome  Liberty  and  Chearfulnefs  of  Mind  in  Prayer  ;  and 
found  the  Dejedtionthat  I  feared,much  removed,  and  mySpirits 
confiderably  refrefh'd. 

[  He  continued  in  a  very  comfortable  chearful  Frame  of 
Mind  the  next  Day,  with  his  Heart  enlarged  in   the  Service  of 

Thuvfday,  Aug,  7.  Rode  to  my  HoufejWhere  I  fpent  the  laft 
"W  inter,  in  order  to  bring  fome  Things  I  needed  for  my  Sufqua- 
hannah*Jo\impy  :  Was  refrefti'd  to  fee  that  Place, which  God  fo 
marvelloufly  vifited  with  the  Showers  of  his  Grace.  Oh  how 
amazingl>  did  the  Power  of  God  often  appear  there  [  Blefi  tht 
Lordy  O  my  Soul,  and  forget  not  ail  his  Benefits, 

[  The  next  Day,  he  fpeaks  of  Liberty,  Enlargement,  and 
Sweetneis  of  Mind,  in  Prayer  and  religious  Converfation.] 

Saturday,  Aug.  g.  In  the  Afternoon,  vifited  my  People ;  fet 
their  Affairs  m  Order,  as  much  as  polfible,  and  contrived  for 
them  theManagement  of  their  worldly  Bufinefs  :  Difcourfed  to 
thetn  in  afolemn  Manner,  and  concluded  with  Prayer.  Was 
com,-/jfed,and  comfortable  in  the  Evening,  2nd  fomewbat  fer- 
vent iQ  iecret. Prayer  :  Had  fome  Senfe  and  View  of  the  eternal 
World, and  found  a  Serenity  of  Mind.  Oh  that  I  could  magnify 
thcLord  for  any  Freedom  he  affords  nne  in  Prayec.      , 

i^ord's-Day,  Aug.  10.  Difcourfed  to  my  People,  both  Parts 
he  Day,  from  ASis  iii.  1^5.     In  dircourfing  oi  Repmtance,  \n 

the 


Tg8      i&V.  29:  ire^LIFE 

the  Forenoon,Go^  helped  me,  (o  that  roy  Difcourfe  was  fearch- 
ingj  (owe  were  in  Tears,  both  of  the  Indians  and  white  People  ; 
and  thQ  Word  of  God  was  attended  withfome  Power.  In  the 
Infermi/lion-Seafon,  I  was  engaged  in  dlfcourfing  to  fome  in  or- 
der to  their  Baptifm  ;  as  well  as  with  One  who  had  then  lately 
met  with  feme  Comfort,  after  fpiritual  Trouble  and  Diflrefs.  In 
the  Afternoon,  was  fomewhat  aflifted  again,  tho'  weak  and 
weary.  Afterwards  baptised  6  Perfons ;  3  Adults,  and  3  Chil- 
dren. Was  in  a  comfortable  Frame  in  the  Evening,  and  en- 
joyed fome  Satisfa6lion  in  fecret  Prayer.  1  fcarce  ever  in  my 
Life  felt  my  felt  io  full  of  Teniernefs,  as  this  Day. 

Monday,  Aug»  1 1.   Being  about    to  fet  out   on  a  Journey  to 
Sufquahannah  the  next  Day,   with  Leave  of  Providence,  1  fpent 
fome  Time  this  Day  in  Prayer  with  my  People,  thatGod  would 
blefs  and  fucceed  my  intended  Journey,  that  he  would  fend  forth 
his  bleil'ed  Spirit  with  his  Word,  and  itt  up  his  Kingdom  among 
the  poor  Indians  in  the  Wildernefs.     While  I  was  opening  and 
applying  Part  of  the  cxth  &  iidPfaims,ihe  Power  cf  God  feem^d 
to  defcend  on  the  AfTembly  in  fome  Meafure  ;  and   while  I  was 
making  the  firft  Prayer,  Numbers   were  melted,  and  1  found 
fome  afFe<£tionateEnlargementof  Soul  my  felf.  Preach'd  iromJ^s 
iv.  31.  God  helped  me,   and  my  interpreter  alfo  :  Theie  was  a 
fhaking  and  melting  among  us ;  and  divers,  I  doubt  not, were  in 
fome  Meafure  JilUd  with  the  Holy  Ghofi,     Afterwards,  Mr. 
Mc  Knight     pray'd  :   I  then  open'd  the  two  laft  Stanza's  of  the 
Ixxiid  Pfalm  ;  at  which  Time  God  was  prefent  with  Ui,  ;  efpe- 
ciaily  while  I  infifted  upon  theProm.ife  o^  aU  Nations  hlejfing  the 
great  Redeemer  :  My   Soul    was  'efrefh'd,   to  think,    that 
this  Day,  this  blefTed  glorious  Seafbn,  (houid  furely  come  ;  and 
I  truft.  Numbers  of  my  dear  People  were  alfo  refrefh'd.    After- 
wards prayM  ;    had  fome  Freedom,but  was  almoit  6pent :  Then 
waik*d  out,  and  left  my  People  to  carry  on   religious  Exeroifes 
among  themfelves  :  They  pray'd  repeatedly5and  fung,  while  I 
refled  and  refrefh'd  my  felf.     Afterwards,  went  to  theMeeting; 
pray'd  with,    and  difmife'd  the  AfTembly.     BlefTed  be  God, 
this  has  been  a  Day  of  Grace.     There  were  many  Tears  and 
afreftionate  Sobs  among   us  this  Day.     In  the  Evenin^i,  my 
Soul  was  refrefh^d  in  Prayer  :  Enjoyed  Liberty  at  the  Throne 
of  Grace,  in  praying  for  my  People  and  l^riends  and  theChurch 
of  Gcd  in  general.     BUJs  the  Lord^  Omy  SouL 

[  The  next  Day,  he  fet  out  on    his  Journey  towards  Sufqua* 
hannahy  and  fix  of  his  Chriftian  Indians  with  him,  whom  he  had 

chofen 


(?/ Afr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1746.     V99 

chofen  out  of  his  Congregation, as  thofe  that  he  Judged  moft  fie 
to  aflift  him  in  the  Bufinefs  he  was  going  upon.  He  took  his 
Way  through  Philadelphia  ;  intending  to  go  to  Sufquahannah^ 
River,  far  down  along,where  it  is  fettled  by  the  white  People, 
below  the  Country  inhabited  by  the  Indians ;  and  fo  to  travel 
up  the  River  to  the  Indian  Habitations  :  For  ahho'  this  was 
much  further  about,yet  hereby  he  avoided  the  hugeMountains, 
and  hideousWildernefsjthat  muft  be  crofs'd  m  the  nearerWay  ; 
which  in  Time  paft  he  had  found  to  be  extreamly  difficult  and 
fatiguing.  He  rode  this  Week  as  far  as  Charlejiown^  a  Place 
of  thatName  about  30  Miles  Weftward  of  Philadelphia  ;  where 
he  arrived  on  Friday  :  And  in  his  Way  hither,  was  for  the 
moft  Part  in  a  compofed  comfortable  State  of  Mind.] 

Saturday,  Jug,  16.  [  At  Charlefiown  ]  It  being  a  Day  kept 
by  thePeople  of  the  Place  Where  I  now  was,  as  preparatory  to 
the  Celebration  of  the  Lord's-Supper,  I  tarried  ;  heard  Mr. 
Treat  preach  ;  and  then  preach'd,my  felf.  God  gave  me  fome 
good  Degree  of  Freedom,  and  helped  me  to  difcourfe  with 
Warmth,  and  Application  to  the  Confcience.  Afterwards, 
I  was  refrcfh'd  in  Spirit,  tho'  much  tired  -,  and  fpent  the  Even- 
in<y  a<yreably5having  fomeFreedom  inPrayerjas  well  asChriftian 
Converfation. 

Lord's-Day,  Aug,  17.  Enjoyed  Liberty,  CompofurCjand  Sa- 
tisfadion,  in  the  fecret  Duties  of  the  Morning  :  Had  myHeart 
fomewhat  enlarged  in  Prayer  for  dearFriends,aii  well  as  for  my 
felf.  In  the  Forenoon,  attended  Mr.  Treat'^  Preaching,  par- 
took of  the  Lord's-Supper,  five  of  my  People  alfo  communr- 
cating  in  this  holy  Ordinance  :  I  enjoyed  fome  Enlargement 
andOut-going  of  Soul  in  thisSeafon.  In  theAfternoon,preach*d 
from  Ezek,  xxxiii.  11.  Enjoyed  not  fo  much  fenfibleAffiftance 
as  the  Day  before  ;  however,  was  helped  to  fome  Fervency  in 
addreffing  immortal  Souls.  Was  fomewhat  confounded  in  the 
Evening,  becaufe  I  thought  I  had  done  little  or  nothing  for 
God  ;  yet  enjoyed  fome  Refrefhment  of  Spirit  in  Chrifiiaa 
Converfation  and  Prayer.  Spent  the  Evening,  'till  near  mid- 
night, in  religious  Exercifes  ;  and  found  my  bodily  Stren^h, 
which  was  much  fpent  when  I  came  from  the  publickWorfhip, 
fomething  renewed  before  I  went  to  Bed. 

Monday,  Aug,  18.  Rode  on  my  Way  towards  Paxton^  upon 
Sufquabannah'RWev,  Felt  my  Spirits  fink,  towards  Night,  fo 
that  I  had  little  Comfort. 

D  d  Tuefday, 


200     ^/.  29.  The  L IF ^ 

Tuefday,  yfw^.  19.  Rode  forward  ftill  ;  and  at  Night  lodged 
by  theSide  of  Sufquahannah,  Was  weak  and  diforder'd,  both 
this  and  the  preceeding  Dayjand  found  my  Spirits  confiderably 
damped,  meeting  with  none  that  I  thought  godly  People. 

Wednefday,  Aug,  20.  Having  lain  in  a  cold  fweat  allNight, 
I  cough'd  much  bloody  Matter  this  Morning,  and  was  under 
great  Diforder  of  Body,  and  not  a  little  Melancholy ;  but 
what  gave  me  fome  Encouragement,  was,  I  had  a  fccret  Hope 
that  I  might  fpeedily  get  a  Difmiflion  from  Earth  and  all  it's 
Toils  and  Sorrows.  Rode  this  Day  to  one  Chambers's^  upon 
Sujquahannah^  and  there  lodged.  Was  much  afflicted,  in  the 
EveningjWith  an  ungodly  Crew,  drinking,  fwearing,  ^c.  Ob, 
what  a  Hell  it  would  be,  to  be  numbered  with  the  Ungocly  ! 
Enjoyed  fome  agreable  Converfation  with  a  Traveller,  who 
feem'd  to  have  fome  Relifh  of  true  Religion. 

Thurfday,  Aug.  21.  Rode  up  the  River  about  15  Miles,  and 
there  lodg'd,  in  a  Family  that  appeared  quite  deftitute  of  God. 
Laboured  to  difcourfe  with  the  Man  about  the  Life  of  Religion, 
but  found  him  very  artful  in  evading  fuch  Converfation. 
Oh,what  a  Death  it  is  to  fome,  to  hear  of  the  Things  of  God  I 
Was  out  of  my  Element  ;  but  was  not  fo  dejeded  as  at  fome 
Times. 

Friday,  Aug,  22.  Continued  my  Courfc  up  the  River  ;  my 
People  now  being  with  me,  who  before  were  parted  from  me  : 
Travelled  above  all  the  Englijh  Settlements ;  at  Night,  lodged 
in  the  open  Woods ;  and  flept  with  more  Comfort,  than  while 
among  an  ungodly  Company  of  white  People.  Enjoyed  fome 
Liberty  in  fecret  Prayer,  this  Evening ;  and  was  helped  to  re- 
member dear  Friends,as  well  as  my  dear  Flock,and  theChurch 
of  God  in  general. 

Saturday,  Aug,  23.  Arrived  at  the  Indian  Town,  called 
Shaumoking^  near  Night.  Was  not  fo  dejeded  as  formerly  ; 
but  yet  fomewhat  exercifed.  Felt  fomewhat  compofed  in  the 
Evening  ;  enjoyed  fomeFreedom  in  leaving  my  All  withGoD  : 
Thro*  the  great  Goodnefs  of  God,  I  enjoyed  feme  Liberty  of 
Mind;  was  not  diftrefi'd  with  a  Defpondency,  as  frequently 
heretofore, 

Lord's-Day,  Aug,  24.  Towards  Noon,  vifited  feme  of  the 
Delawares^  and  difcourfed  with  them  about  Chriftianity.  Jn 
the  Afternoon,  difcourfed  to  the  King^zrA  others,  upon  divine 
Things ;  who  feem'd  difpofcd  to  hear.  Spent  moft  of  the  Day 
in  thefe  Exercifes.  In  the  Evening,  enjoyed  fome  Comfort 
and  cati^faclion  •,   and  efpecialiy  had  fome  Swcetnefs  \n  fecret 

Prayer ; 


r/  Afr.  David  Brainerd.    A.D.  1746.     201 

Prayer  •  This  Duty  was  made  fo  agreable  to  me,  that  I  loved 
to  walk  abroad  and  repeatedly  engage  in  it.  Oh,  how  comfor- 
table is  a  little  Gliropfe  of  God  !  . 

Monday,^-/.  25-  Spent  mo«  of  the  Day  mwrmng.  Sent 
out  mv  People  that  were  wiih  me,  to  talk  with  the  Mwm.^Ki 
contra'a  a  Friendfhip  and  Familiarity  with  them,  that  I  might 
have  abetter  Opportunity  of  treating  v^ith  them  about  Chrif- 
tianity.  SomeGood  feem'd  to  be  done  by  their  Vifits  this  Day, 
diverLppear'd  willing  to  hearken  .0  Chrifjianuy.  My  Sp.rUs 
were  a  little  refre(h'd,this  Evening  j  and  I  found  feme  Liberty 
and  Satisfaaion,  in  Prayer. 

Tuefday,  Aug.  26.  About  Noon.difcourfed  to  =>  conf.dera- 
ble  Number  Jlndiam  :  God  help'd  me,  1  arn  perfwaded  ;  I 
was  enabled  to  fpeak  with  much  Plainnefs.  and  fome  Warmth 
and  Power.  The  Difcourfe  had  ImprefTion  upon  fome,  and 
made  them  appear  very  fcrious.  I  thought.  Things  now  ap- 
pear'd  as  encouraging,as  they  did  at  Crofwuh  At  the  Time 
of  my  firft  Vifit  to  thofe  Indians.  I  was  a  little  encouraged  : 
I  preffed  Things  with  all  my  Might ;  and  "U'd  out  my  Peo- 
ple, who  were  then  prefent,  to  give  in  ih»r  Tejimony  iot 
God  ;  which  they  did.  Towards  Night  was  refrcfh  d  ; 
felt  a  Heart  to  pray  for  thefetting  up  of  God's  Kmgdoin  here  ; 
as  well  as  for  my  deatCongregation  below,and  my  dear  Friends 

Wednefday,  Jug.  27.  There  having  been  a  thick  Smoak, 
in  the  Houfe  where  I  lodged,  all  Night  before,  whereby  I  was 
almoft  choked,  I  wa3  this  Morning  diftrefs'd  with  Pains  m  my 
Head  and  Neck,  and  could  have  no  Rett.  In  the  Morning,  the 
Emoak  was  flill  the  fame  ;  and  a  cold  eaflerly  Storm  gathermg, 
I  could  neither  live  within  Doors  nor  without,  fny  long  1  ime 
together  ;  I  was  pierced  with  the  Rawnefs  of  the  Air  abroad, 
in  the  Houfe  diflrefs'd  with  the  Smoak.  I  was  this  Day  very 
vapoury,  and  lived  in  greatDiftrefs.and  had  not  Health  enough 
to  do  any  Thing  to  any  Purpofe. 

Thurfday,  M-  28-  I"  'he  Forenoon,  was  under  great 
Concern  of  Mind  about  my  Work.  Was  vifued  by  fome  who 
defired  to  hear  me  preach;  difcourfed  to  'em,  m  the  After- 
noon, with  fome  Fervency,  antl  laboured  to  perfwadeeni  to 
turn  to  God.  Was  full  of  Concern  for  the  Kingdom  of  Uiritt, 
and  found  fome  Enlargement  of  Soul  in  Prayer,  both  in  fecret 
and  in  myFamily.  Scarcely  ever  faw  moreclearly,than  thisDay 
that 'tis  God's V»ri  to  convert  Souls,  and  efpecially  poor 
Hmthms  :  1  knew,  I  could  not  touch  them;  Ifaw,  1  could 
D  d  2  «"'? 


202    'Mt.K^^.  ^re^LIFE 

cnly  fpcak  to  dry  Bones^  but  could  give  them  no  Senfe  of  what 
I  faid.  My  Eyes  were  up  to  God  for  Help  :  I  could  fay 
the  Work  was  his  j  and  if  done,  the  Glory  would  be  his, 

Friday,  Aug.  29.  Felt  the  fame  Concern  of  Mind^  as  the 
Day  before.  Enjoyed  fome  Freedom  in  Prayer,  and  a  Satis- 
faaion  to  leave  all  with  God.  Travelled  to  the  Delawares^ 
^und  itvf  at  home :  Felt  poorly,  but  wps  able  to  fpend  fome 
Time  alone  m  readingGod'sWord  &.inPrayer,3cenjoyedfome 
Sweetnefs  in  thefe  Exercifes.  In  the  Evening,  was  affifled  re- 
peatedly in  Prayer,  and  found  fome  Comfort  in  cominff  to  the 
Throne  of  Grace. 

Saturday,  Jug.  30.     Spent  theForenoon  in  vifiting  ^Trader^ 
that  came  down  the  River >i  ;   who  appeared  as  ignorant  as 
any  Indian.     In  the  Afternoon,  fpent  fome  Time  in  Writing 
Reading  and  Prayer. 

.  i^ord's-Day,  Aug.  31.  Spent  much  TJme,in  theMorning, 
in  fecret  Duties :  Found  a  Weight  upon  my  Spirits,  and  could 
not  but  cry  to  God  with  Concern  and  Engagement  of  Soul. 
Spent  fome  Time  alfo  in  reading  and  expounding  God's  Word 
to  my  dear  Family,  that  was  with  me,as  well  as  in  Singing  and 
Prayer  with  them.  Afterwards,  fpake  the  Word  of  God,  to 
fome  few  of  the  Sufquahannah- Indians.  In  the  Afternoon,  felt 
very  weak  and  feeble.  Near  Night,  was  fomething  refrefh'd 
in  Mind,  wuh  fome  Views  of  Things  relating  to  my  great 
Work.  Oh,  how  heavy  is  my  Work,  when  Faith  can't  take 
hold  of  an  Almighty  Arm,  for  the  Performance  of  it !  Many 
Times  have  I  been  ready  to  fink  in  this  Cafe.  BlefTed  be  God, 
that  I  may  repair  to  a  full  Fountain. 

Monday,  September  i.  Set  out  on  ajourney  towards  a  Place 
called  The  great  Ifland,  about50  MWesd'AUtithomShaumoking, 
in  the  North- weitern  Branch  of  Sufquahannah.  Travelled  fome 
Part  of  the  Way,  and  at  Night  lodged  in  tli.e  Woods.  Was 
exceeding  feeb:e,thisDay,and  fweat  much  the  Night  following. 

i  uclday,  S^^t.  2.  Rode  forward  ;  but  no  fafter  than  my 
1  cople  went  on  Foot.  Was  very  weak,  on  this,  as  well  as  the 
preceedingDavs  :  Was  fo  feeble  and  faint,that  1  fear'd  it  would 
K\\\  me  to  he  out  m  the  open  Air  ;  And  fome  of  ourCompany 
being  parted  from  u.s  fo  that  we  had, now  no  Ax  with  us,  1  had 
?io  vVay  but  to  climb  into  a  young  Pine-Tree,  and  with  my 
Knife  to  lop  the  Branchcs^and  lo  made  a  Shelter  from  theDew. 
but  the  Evening  being  cloudy  and  very  likely  for  Rain,  I  was 
tt.h  under  Pears  of  being  extremely  expofcd  :  Sweat  muc^m 
:iie.\ighr,  to  chat  my    Linen  was  almoft  wringing  wet  all 

Night, 


of  Mr,  David  Brainerd.       A.D.  1 746.    203 

Nieht.  I  fcarce  ever  was  more  weak  and  weary,  than  this 
Evening,  when  I  was  able  to  fit  up  at  all.  This  wa3  a  melan- 
choly Situation  I  was  in  ;  but  I  endeavoured  to  quiet  my  felf 
withConfiderations  of  the  Pcffibiiity  of  my  being  m  much  worfe 
Circumftances,amongft  Enemies,  e^r^. 

Wednefday,  Sept.  3.  Rode  to  the  Delaware-Tovjn  ;  found 
divers  drinkinc^  and  drunken.  Difcourfed  with  feme  of  the 
7«^/^«j  about  Chriftiariity;  obferved  my  7«/^rpr^/^r  much  eri- 
p-acred  and  affifled  in  his  Work  :  Some  few  Perfons  feem'd  to 
hear  with  great  Earneftnefs  and  Engagement  of  Soul.  About 
Neon,  rode  to  a  fmall  Town  of  Shauwaunoei,  about  8  Miles 
dittant ;  fpent  an  Hour  or  two  there,  and  returned  to  UntDda- 
^^r.-Town,  and  lodged  there.  Was  fcarce  ever  more  con- 
founded with  a  Senfe  of  my  own  Unfruitfulnefs  and  Unfitnef^ 
for  my  Work,  than  now.  Oh,  what  a  dead,  heartlef3,bar  ren, 
unprofitable  Wretch  did  I  now  fee  my  felf  to  be  !  My  Spirits 
were  fo  low,  and  my  bodily  Strength  fo  wafted,  that  I  could 
do  nothing  at  all.  At  Length,  being  much  overdone,  lay 
down  on  a  Buffalo-Skin  ;  but  fweat  much,  the  whole  Night. 

Thurfday,  Sept.  4.  Difcourfed  with  the  Indians^  in  the 
Morning,  about  Chriftianity  ;  my  Interpreter^  afterwards,car- 
rying  on  the  Difcourfe,  to  a  confiderable  Length  :  Some  few 
appeared  well-difpofed,  and  fomewhat  affeded.  Left  thisPlace, 
and  returned  towards  Shaumoking  ;  and  at  Night  lodged  in  the 
Place  where  1  lodged  the  Monday-Night  before  :  Was  in  very 
uncomfortable  Circumftances  in  the  Evening,my  People  being 
belated,  and  not  coming  to  me  'till  paft  10  at  Night ;  fo  that 
I  had  no  Fire  to  drefs  any  Viduals,  or  to  keep  me  Warm,  or 
keep  ofF  wild  Beafts  ;  and  I  was  fcarce  ever  more  weak  and 
worn  out  in  all  my  Life.  However,  I  lay  down  and  flept  be- 
fore my  People  came  up,  expedlng  Nothing  elfe  but  to  fpend 
the  whole  Night  alone  and  without  Fire. 

Friday,  Sept.  5.  Was  exceeding  weak,fo  that  I  could  fcarce- 
ly  ride  ;  it  feem'd  fometimes  as  if  I  muft  fall  ofFfrom  myHorfe, 
and  lie  in  the  open  Woods :  However,  got  to  Shaumoking^ 
towards  Night :  Felt,  fomething  of  a  Spirit  of  Thankmlnels, 
tftat  God  had  fo  far  returned  mc  :  Was  refrefh'd,  to  fee  one 
of  my  Chriilians,  whom  I  \di  here  in  my  late  Excurfion. 

Saturday,  Sept.  6.  Spent  the  Day  in  a  very  weak  State  ; 
Coughing'and  fpitting  Blood,  and  having  little  Appetite  to  any 
Food  I  had  with  me  :  Was  able  io  do  very  little,  except 
difcourfe  a  while  of  divine  Things  to  my  own  People,  and  to 
fome  few  I  met  with.     Had,  by  this  Time,  very  little  Life  or 

Heart 


'204  Mt,  29;  ^e  LIFE 

Heart  to  fpeak  for  God,  thro'  Fecblenefs  of  Body,  and  Flatnefs 
of  Spirits.  Was  fcarcely  evermore  afhamed  and  confounded 
in  my  felf,  than  now.  I  was  fenfible,  that  there  wereNum- 
bers  of  God's  People,  who  knew  I  was  then  out  apon  a  Defign 
{or  at  leaft  the  Pretence)  of  doing  fomething  for  God,  and  in 
bis  Caufe,  among  the  poor  Indians  ;  and  they  were  ready  to 
fuppofe,  that  I  yi2i%  fervent  in  Spirit :  But  Oh,  the  heartlefs 
Frame  of  Mind  that  I  felt,  fill'd  me  with  Confufion  !  Oh 
(methought)  if  God's  People  knew  me,  as  God  knows,  they 
would  not  think  fo  highly  of  my  Zeal  and  Refolution  for 
God,  as  perhaps  now  they  do  !  I  could  not  but  defire  they 
fhould  fee  how  heartlefs  and  irrefolute  I  was,  that  they  might 
be  undeceived,  and  not  think  "^of  me  above  what  they  ought  to 
think.  And  yet  I  thought,  if  they  faw  the  ufmoftof  myFlat- 
nefs  and  Unfaithfulnefs,  the  Smallnefs  of  my  Courage  andRe- 
folution  for  God,  they  would  be  ready  to  fliut  me  out  of  their 
Doors, as  unworthy  of  theCompany  orFriendfhipof  Chriftians. 

Lord's-Day,  Sept.  7,  Was  much  in  the  fame  weak  State  of 
Body,  and  afBifted  Frame  of  Mind,  as  in  the  preceedingDay: 
My  Soul  was  grieved,  and  mourn'd,  that  I  could  do  nothing 
for  God.  Read  and  expounded  fome  Part  of  God's  Word  to 
my  own  dear  Family,  and  fpent  fome  Time  in  Prayer  with 
them;  difcourfed  alfo  a  little  ioih^Pagam:  But  fpent  the 
Sabbath  with  little  Comfort. 

Monday,  Sept.  8.  Spent  the  Forenon  among  the  Indians ; 
in  the  Afternoon,  left  Shaumoking,    and    returned   down   the 
River,  a  few  Miles.     Had  propofed  to  have   tarried  a  confide- 
rable  Time  longer   among  the  Indians  upon  Sufquahannah^  but 
washindred"  from  purfuing   my  Purpofe  by  the  Sicknefs  that 
prevailed  there,   the  weakly  Circumftances  of  my  own  People 
that  were  with  me,  &  efpecially  my  own  extraordinary  Weak- 
nefs,  having  been  exercifed  with  great  nocturnal  Sweats,    and 
a  coughing  up  of  Blood,  in  almoft  the  whole  of  the  Journey  ; 
and  was  a  great  Part  of  the   Time  fo  feeble  and  faint,    that  it 
feem'd  as  tho*  I  never  fhould  be  able  to  reach  home  ;  and  at 
the  fameTime  very  deftitute  of  theComforts&  evenNeceflariei 
o(Life  ;  at  leaft, what  was  necefTary  for  one  in  (o  weak  aState. 
In  this  Journey  1  fometimes  was  enabled  to  fpeak  the  Word  of 
God  with  fome  Power,  and  divine  Truths  made  fome  Impref* 
fions  on  divers  that  heard  me  ;  fo  thatfeveral,  both  Men  and 
Women,   old  and  young,  feem'd  to  cleave  to  usy  and   be  well 
difpofed   towards  Chri/iianity  ;  but  others  mocked  and  flouted, 
which  damp'd  thofe  who  before  feem'd  friendly,  at  leaflfome 

of 


(?/ Air,  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1746;     205 

<r.t,.m  •  Yet  God,  at  Times,  was  evidently  prefent,  affifting 
^?  mTlnte  Prete'  .nd  other  dear  Friends  who  we,e  with 
Zl'-  God  gave,  fometimes.  a  goodDegree  of  Freedom  mPray- 
?r  for  the  iLathering  of  Souls  there  j  and  I  could  not  but  en- 
ter ain  a  ftrong  Hope,  that  the  Journey  fhould  not  bewhc^iy 
Jru  lef'  Whether  ^h^  Iffue  of  it  would  be  the  fettmg  upChr.ft's 
^KrS^mT*.^-„lytf.dr^^^^^ 

;ro^on^yTeS^orfoSuS  Attempt,    that  nJght  be 

%ueTy?5rp.td"Xwnthe  River,  near  3?  Mje,. 
Was  extreme  weak,  much  fatigued,  and  wet  with  aThunder- 
sTorm  oTfcourfed  with  fome  Warmth  and  Clofenefs  to  fome 
poor^gnorant  Souls,  on  the  Life  and  P^wer  of  Rehg.cn  ■  what 
lere  and  what  were  not  the  ^t;i^.»."  of  it  They  feem  d 
Tuch  aftonifh'd,  when  they  faw  my  /«^,.«i  a&  a  Bleffing  and 
give  Thanks  at  Dinner ;  coneluding  /^  a  very  h^ght-vdence 
o  Grace  in  them:  But  were  aftomlhed,  when  I  mfifted  that 
neUher  that,  nor  yet  (ecret  Prayer,  was  any  fure  Evidence  of 
G  Ice  Oh  the  Ignorance  of  the  V/orld  How^  are  fome 
emotv  outward  pJms,  that  may  all  be  intirely /#A  m.ftaken 
SeTligion.infamble  Evidences  of  it!  The  Lord  pity  a 

^'^tfdZ!ly,'s.pt.  TO.  Rode  near  twenty  Miles  homeward. 
Was  much  folicited  to  preach,  but  was  utterly  unable,  thro 
todily  Weaknefs.     Was   extremely  overdone  wuh  the  Heat 
and  Showers  this  Day,  and  coughed  up  confiderable  Blood. 

Thurfdav,  J>/".  II.  Rode  homeward  J  but  was  very  weak, 
and  fometimes  fcarce  able  to  ride.  Had  a  very  impor.unatein 
Vi^ation  to  preach  at  aMeeting-Houfe  I  came  by  hePeople  be 
inMften  gathering  ;  but  could  not.byReafon  ofWeaknefs.Was 
efigr..d  ^and'  compofed  under  my  Weaknefs  ;  but  was  much 
exercifed  with  Concern  for  mv  Companionsm  Travel,  whom 
I  had  left  with  much  Regret,  fome  lame,  and  fome  lick. 

Friday  SM.  .2.  Rode  about  fifty  Miles  ;  andcamejuftat 
Nigh  tJ'a  Chrift.an  Fricnd'sHoufe,  about  35  Miles Weftward 
froL  Phiiaielphia.  Was  courteoufly  received,  and  k'ndly  en- 
terl^ir/d!  and  found  my  f=lf  much  refrca'd  in  the  mtdft  of  my 
Weaknefs  andFatigucs. 

Saturday, 


2o6    JEi.  29;  The  LIF  E 

Saturday,  Sept,  13.  Was  ftill  agreably  entertained  with 
Chriftian  Friendfhip,  and  allThings  neceiTary  for  my  weakCir- 
cumftances  ;  In  the  Afternoon,  heard  Mr.  Treat  preach  j 
and  was  refrefh'd    in  Convcrfation  with  him,  in  the  Evening. 

LordVDay,  5^/>M4.  At  the  Defire  of  Mr.  Treat  and  the 
People,  I  preach'd  both  Parts  of  the  Day  (  but  (hort )  from 
Luk.  xiv.  23.  God  gave  me  fome  Freedom  and  Warmth  in 
my  Difcourfe  ;  and  1  truft,  helped  me  in  fome  Meafure  to  la- 
bour in  fmglenefs  of  Heart,  Was  much  tired  in  the  Evening, 
but  was  comforted  with  the  moft  tender  Treatment  1  ever  met 
within  my  Life.  My  Mind,  thro'  the  whole  of  this  Day, 
was  exceeding  calm  ;  and  I  could  afk  for  nothing  in  Prayer, 
with  any  Encouragement  of  Soul,  but  that  the  Will  of  God 
might  be  done, 

Monday,  Sept,  15.  Spent  the  whole  Day,  in  Concert  with 
Mr.  Tre(.t,  in  Endeavours  to  compofe  a  Difference,  fubfifting 
between  certain  Perfons  in  the  Congregation  where  we  now 
were  ;  There  feem'd  to  be  a  Blefling  on  our  Endeavours.  In 
theEvening, baptized  aChild  :  Was  in  a  calm  compofeuFrame^ 
and  enjoyed  (  I  truft  )  a  fpiritual  Senfe  of  divine  Things, while 
adminiftring  the  Ordinance.  Afterwards,  fpent  the  Time  in 
religious  Converfation,  'till  late  in  the  Night.  This  was  indeed 
a  pleafant  agreable  Evening. 

Tuefday,  Sept.  16.  Continued  ftill  at  my  Friend's  Houfe, 
about  25  Miles  Weftward  of  Philadelphia,  Was  very  weak, 
unable  to  perform  any  Bufinefs,  and  fcarcely  able  to  fit  up. 

Wednel'day,  Sept.  17.  Rode  into  Philadelphia.  Still  very 
weak,  and  my  Cough  and  fpitting  of  Blood  continued.  Enjoy- 
ed fome  agreable  Converfation  with  Friends,  but  wanted  more 
Spirituality.' 

Thurfday,  Sept.  18.  Went  from  Philadelphia  toMr.  Treat's  : 
Was  agreably  entertained  on  the  Road  ;  and  was  in  a  fweet 
compofed  Frame,  in  the  Evening. 

Friday,  Sept.  19.  Rode  from  Mr.  Treat's  to  Mr.  Stockton'^ 
at  Prince-Town  :  Was  extream  weak,  but  kindly  received  and 
cnterrain'd.  Spent  the  Evening  with  fome  Degree  of  Satis- 
facS^ion. 

Saturdsy,  Sfpi- 10.  Arrived  among  my  own  People,  juft  at 
Night  :  Found  'em  praying  together :  Went  in, and  gave  them 
fome  Account  of  God's  Dealings  with  me  and  my  Companions 
in  the  Journey  ;  which  feem'd  afFe<Sting  to  them.  I  then  pray'd 
with  them,  and  thought  the  divine  Prefence  was  smongft  us  ; 
divers  were  mJted  into  Tears,  and  feem'd  to  have  a  Senfe  of 

Divine 


ef  Mr.  David  Brainerd:     A.D.  1 746.     207 

divine  Things.  Being  very  weak,  I  was  obliged  foon  to  re- 
pair to  my  Lodgings,  and  felt  much  worn  out,  in  the  Evening. 
Thus  God  has  carried  me  thro'  the  Fatigues  and  Perils  of  ano- 
ther Journey  to  Su/quahannabyZnd  returned  me  again  in  Safety, 
tho'  under  a  great  Degree  of  bodily  Indifpofition.  Oh  that 
my  Soul  were  truly  thankful  for  renewed  Inftances  of  Mercy  ! 
Many  Hardships  andDiftrefTes  I  endured  in  this  Journey  :  But 
the  Lord  fupported  me  under  them  all. 


Part     VIIL 

After  Bis  Return  from  his  lafl  "Journey  to 
Sufquahannah,  until  his  Death. 

[iV.  jg.y  TITHERTO  Mr.  Braherdhzi^ kept  a  conftant 
J~l  Z)/<7r;',  giving  anAccount  of  what  pafs*d  frcra 
Day  to  Day,  with  very  little  Interruption  : 
But  henceforward  his  Diary  is  very  much  interrupted  by  his 
Illnefs  ;  under  which  he  was  often  brought  fo  low,  as  either 
not  to  be  capable  of  writing,  or  not  well  able  to  bear  the  Bur- 
den of  a  Care  fo  conflant,  as  was  rcquiflte,  to  recolleft,  every 
Evening, what  had  pafTed  in  the  Day, and  digeft  it,  and  fet  down 
an  orderly  Account  of  it  in  Writing.  However,  his  Diary 
was  not  wholly  neglected  ;  but  he  took  Care,  from  Time  to 
Time,  to  take  fome  Notice  in  it  of  the  moft  material  Things 
concerning  himfelf  and  the  State  of  his  Mind, even  till  within  a 
few  Days  of  his  Death  ^   as  the  Reader  will  fee  afterwards.  *] 

Lord's-Day, 

*  Mr.  Shepard^  in  his  Seka  Cafes  refolved^  under  the  firft 
Cafe  fays  as  follows.  ' '  1  have  lately  known  one  very  able, 
*«  wife,  and  godly,  put  upon  the  Rack,  by  him  that  en- 
*'  vyingGod'sPeople's  Peace, knows  how  to  change  him- 
"  felf  into  zTi  Angel  of  Light :  For  it  being  his  ufualCourfe 
^««  in  the  Time  of  his  Health  toroakeaZ)/flry  of  his  hourly 
**  Life,  and  finding  much  Benefit  by  it,  he  was  in  Con- 
E  e  fcieoec 


2o8    Mt.  29:  7^^  L I F  E 

LordVDay  ,  Sept.  21.  1746.  I  was  fo  weak  I  could  not 
preach,  nor  pretend  to  ride  over  to  my  People  in  theForeqoorj. 
In  the  Afternoon,  rode  out  ;  fat  in  my  Chair,  and  difcourfed 
tomyPeople  fromRom.  xiv.  7,8.  I  was  ftrengthen'd  and  helped 
in  my  DJfcourfe  :  And  there  appeared  fomething  agreable  in 
the  AfFembly.  I  returned  to  my  Lodgings  extremely  tired  ; 
but  thankful,  that  I  had  been  enabled  to  fpeak  a  Word  to  my 
poor  People  I  had  been  fo  long  abfent  from.  Was  able  to 
fleep  very  little  this  l^Tight,  thro'  Wearinefs  and  Pain.  Oh, 
how  blefled  fliould  I  be,  if  the  little  I  do  were  all  done  with 
rightViews  !  Oh  that  whether  J  live  ^l  might  live  to  theLord.kc. 

Saturday,  Sept.  27.  Spent  this  Day,  as  well  as  the  whole 
Week  pari,  under  a  great  Degree  of  bodily  Weaknefs,  cxcr- 
cifed  with  a  violent  Cough,  and  a  confiderable  Fever  ;  had  no 
Appetite  to  anyKind  of  Food  3  and  frequently  brought  up  what 
I  eat,  as  foon  as  it  was  down ;  and  oftentimes  had  little  Reft 
in  my  Bed,  by  Reafon  of  Pains  in  my  Breaft  and  Back  :  Was 
able,  however,  to  ride  over  to  my  People,  about  two  Miles, 
every  Day,  ^nd  take  fome  Care  of  thofe  who  were  then  at 
Work  upon  a  fmall  Houfe  for  me  to  refide  in  amongft  the/«i;- 
ons.  *  I  was  fometimes  fcarce  able  to  walk,  and  never  able 
to  fit  up  the  whole  Day, thro'  the  Week.  Was  calm  and.com- 
pofed,  and  but  little  exercifed  with  melancholy  Damps,  as  in 
former  Seafons  of  weaknefs :  Whether  I  fhould  ever  recover, 
cr  no,  feem'd  very  doubtful  ;  but  this  was  many  times  a  Com- 
fort to  me,thatZ«//>  and  Death  did  not  depend  upon  my  Choice, 
I  was  pleafed,  to  think,  that  he  who  is  infinitely  wife,  had  the 


<«  fcience  prefs'd,  by  the  Power  and  Dclufion  of  Satan^ 
«'  to  make  and  take  the  fame  daily  Survey  of  his  Life  in 
*«  theTime  of  his  Sicknefi :  By  Means  of  which  he  fpent 
*«  his  enfeebled  Spirits,  caft  on  Fuel  to  fire  his  Sicknefs. 
*«  Had  not  a  Friend  of  his  convinced  him  of  his  erroneous 
««  ConrcicncemineadinghiniatthatTime,bebadmurdcr'd 
<«  hisBody,outotConfciencetofavehisSouIand  topreferve 
«'  his  Grace.  And  do  you  think  thefe  were  theMotions  of 
«<  God'bSpirit, which  \\kQ{hokLocu/fs^Rev.\x>  9,  10.  Had 
"  Faces  likeA//«,  but  had  Tails  like  Scorpions y^nd  Stings 
**  in  their  Tails  ?'* 
*  This  was  the  fourth  Hou(c  he  built  for  his  Refidencea- 
mong  the  Indium.  Bcfidcs  that  at  Kaunaumeek^  and  that 
at  the  Forks  of  Delawatey  and  another  at  Crojweekjung^ 
he  built  one  r.ovv  at  Cranbcry,  Determination 


of  Mr,  David  Brainerd.        A,D.  1 746.  209 

Determination  of  this  Matter  ;  and  that  I  had  no  Trouble,  to 
confider  and  weighThings  upon  all  Sides,in  order  to  mi^kc  the 
Choice,  whether  I  would  live  or  die.  Thus  my  1  ime  was 
confumed  ;  I  had  little  Strength  to  pray,none  to  write  or  read 
and  fcarce  any  to  meditate  :  But  thro'  divincGoodnef^J  ecu  d 
with  ereat  Compofure  look  Death  in  the  Face,  and  frequently 
with  fenfible  Jov.  Oh,  how  blefTed  it  is,  to  be  habitually  pre- 
pared '.ox  Death'!  The  Lord  grant,   that  I  may  htactudly  rca- 

^  Lord's-Day,  Sept^  28.  Rode  to  my  People  ;  and  tho'  under 
much  VVeaknefs,  attempted  to  preach,frcm  2  CorrAnx,  5.  Dil- 
courfed  about  half  an  Hour  5  at  which  Seafon  divme  Power 
feem'd  to  attend  the  Word  :  But  being  extreme  weak,  I  was 
obliged  to  defift  ;  and  after  a  Turn  of  Pamtnefs,  wiih  much 
Difficulty,  rode  to  my  Lodgings;  where  betaking  my  k\i  to 
my  Bed,  Hay  in  a  burning  Fever,  and  aim' ft  delinous,  for 
feveral  Hours ;  'till  towards  Morning,  my  Fever  went  eft 
with  a  violent  Sweat.  I  have  often  been  fcverjfb,  and  unable 
to  reft  quietly  after  Preaching  ;  but  this  was  the  moll  feverc 
diftreffint^  Turn,  that  ever  Preaching  brought  upon  me.  Yet 
I  fe't  per%aiy  at  Keft  in  my  own  Mind,  becaufe  1  had  made 
my  utmoft  Attempts  to  fpcak  for  God,  and  knew  I  could  do 

no  more.  r^  -       1 

Tuefday,  Sept,  30.  Yeflerday,  and  to  Day,  was  m  me 
fame  weak  State,  or  rather  weaker  ihm  in  Days  paft  ;  was 
fcarce  able  to  fit  up  half  the  Day.  Was  in  a  corapofed  V  rame 
of  Mind,  remarkably  free  from  Dejeaion  and  melancholy 
Damns  ;  as  God  has  been  plcafed,  in  great  Meafure,  to  cc.i-^ 
ver  me  from  tbefc  unhappy  Glooms,  in  the  general  Courfe  of 
my  prefent  weakncfs  hitherto,  andalfo  from  a  peevifn  frowara 
Spirit :  And  Oh,  how  great  a  Mercy  is  this  !  Oh  thatl  might 
always  be  perfeaiv  quiet  in  Seafonsof  greateftWeaknefs^altho 
Nature  fhould  fink  and  fail.  Oh  that  1  may  always  be^  anle 
with  utmoft  Sincerity  to  fay.  Lord,  not  my  Will,  hut  thine  be 
iom  /  This,  thro'  Grace,  I  can  fay  at  prefent,  with  Regard  to 
Life  or  Death  :  The  Lord  do  with  tji^  ai  feems  gosd  in  his  Sight  ; 
that  whether  I  live  or  die,  I  may  ^/^rZ/y  him,  yNhox^ivorthyU 
remve  BklTing,  and  Honour^  and  Dominion  forever.^  Amen, 

Saturday,  OP.oh.  4.  Spent  the  former  Part  of  this  Week  un- 
^er  a  great  Decree  of  Infirm.ity  and  DIforder,  as  I  had  done 
feveral  Weeks  before  :  Was  able  however  to  ride  a  little  every 
Day,  altho' unable  to  fit  up  half  the  Day,  'till  Thurfday. 
Took  fome  Cars  daily  of  fomePerfons  at  work  upon  myHouic. 

E  e  2  <-ii 


2io      ^7.29:  ^/JtfLIFE 

On  Friday,  after  Noon, found  my  felf  wonderfully  revived  and 
ftrcngthen'd  ;  and  having  fome  Time   before  given  Notice  to 
my  People,  and  thofe  of  'em  at  the  Forks  of  Delaware  in  parti- 
cular, that  I  defigned  with  Leave  of  Providence  to  adminifter 
the  Sacrament  of  the  Lord's  Supper  upon   the  firft  Sabbath  in 
O^ober,  the  Sabbath  now  approaching,  on  Friday-Afternoon  I 
preach'd,  preparatory  to   the  Sacrament,   from  2  Cer.  xiii.  5. 
Finifhing  what  I  had  propofed  to  offer  upon  the  Subjedt   the 
Sabbath  before.  The  Sermon  was  blefs'd  of  God  to  the  flirring 
up  religious  AfFedlion,  and    a  Spirit  of  Devotion,  in  the  Peo- 
ple of  God  ;  and  to  the  greatly  afFeding  one  who  had  hack- 
Jlidden  hom  God ^  which  caufed  him  to    judge   and    condemn 
himfelf.     I  was  furprizingly  ftrengthned  in  my  Work,  while  I 
was  fpeaking  :  But  was  obliged  immediately  after  to  repair  to 
Bed,  being;  no(v  removed  into  my  own  Houfe  among  the  7/2- 
dians ;  v/hich  gave  me  fuch  fpeedy  Relief  and  Refrefhment, 
as  I  could  not  well  have  liv'd  without.      Spent  fome  Time  on 
Frida)  -Night  in  converfing  with  my  People  about  divineThings, 
as  I  lay  upon  my  Bed  -,  andfomd  my  Soul  refrefh'd,   tho*  my 
Body  was  weak.     This  being  Saturday,  I  difcourfed    particu- 
larly with  divers  of  the  Communicants  ;  and  this   Afternoon 
preach'd  from  Z^^^.  xii.  10.  There    feem'd    to  be  a  tender 
Melting,  and  hearty  mourning  for  Sin,  inNumbers  in  theCon- 
gregation.     My  Soul  was  in    a  comfortable  Frame,   and  I  en- 
joy'd  Freedom  andAfliftance  in  publick  Service  :  Was  my  felf, 
as  well  as  moftof  the  Congregation,    much  afFe6led  with  the 
humble  Confeffion,  and  apparent  Broken-heartednefs  of  the 
forementioned    Eackjlider  ;  and   could  not  but  rejoyce,  that 
God  had  given  him  fuch  a  Senfe  of  his  Sin  and  tJnworthinefs, 
Was  extremely  tired  in  the  Evenings  but  lay  on  my  Bed,  and 
difcourfed  to  my  People. 

Lord*i-Day,  OHoh.  5.  Was  ftill  very  weak  ;  and  in  the 
Morning,  confiderably  afraid  I  fliou'Id  not  be  able  to  go  thro' 
the  Work  of  the  Day  ;  having  much  lo  do,  both  in  private  and 
publick.  Difcourfed  before  the  Adminiftration  of  the  Sacra- 
ment, from  7<j/;.  i.  29.  Behold  the  Lamb  of  God,  that  iahtb 
away  the/in  cf  the  IVorld.  Where  I  confidsred,  I.  Jn  what  Re- 
fpe6tsChri(t  is  called  thcLamb  ofGcd  ;  and  obferved  that  he  is  fo 
called,  (  i)  From  the  Purity  and  Innocencyoi  his  Nature.(2  ) 
From  his  Mcehnefi  and  Patience  under  Sufferings.  (  3  )  From 
his  being  that  Atonement^  which  was  pointed  out  in  the  Sacrifice 
of  Lambs,  and  in  particular  by  the.  pa/chal  h^mb,  II.  Confi- 
dcred  how  nnd  in  what  Senfe  he  nktsaway  the  SinofiheJVorld  : 

And 


e/ Mr.  David  Brainerd.      A.D.1746,     211 

And  obferved,  that  the  Means  and  Manner,  in  and  by  which 
he  takes  away  the  Sins  of  Men,  was  his  giving  himfelffor  them^ 
doing  and  fuffering  in  theirRoom  and  Stead, b^f.  And  he  is  (aid 
to  take  away  the  Sin  of  the  Worlds  not  becaufe  all  the  World 
fhaJl  aSlually  be  redeemed  from  Sin  by  him,  but  becaufe,  (  i  ) 
He  has  done  and  fufFered  fufficient  to  anfwer  for  the  Sins  of  the 
World,  and  fo  to  redeem  all  Mankind  ;  (^  2  )  He  aSually  does 
take  away  the  Sins  of  the  eh^  World.  And  III.  Confidered 
how  we  are  to  behold  him, in  order  to  have  our  Sins  taken  away. 
(  I  )  Not  with  bur  bodily  Eyes :  Nor  (  2  )  By  imagining  him 
on  theCrofs,  ^c.  But  by  z  fpiritual  View  of  his  Glory  and 

Goodnefs,  engaging  the  Soul  to  rely  on  him,  i^c. The  di- 

vinePrefence  attended  thisDifcourfe  ;  and  theAlTembly  wascon- 
fidcrably  melted  withdivineTruths.  After  Sermon  baptized  two 
Perfons.  Then  adminiftred  theLord's  Supper  to  near  40  Com- 
municants, of  the  7«i/^nj,  befides  divers  dear  Chriftians  of  the 
white  People.  It  feem*d  to  be  a  Seafon  of  divine  Pov^er  and 
Grace;  and  Numbers  feem'd  to  rejoyce  in  God.  Oh,  the 
fvveet  Union  and  Harmony  then  appearing  among  the  religious 
People  !  My  Soul  was  refrefh'd,  and  my  reli^ous  Friends,  of 
the  whitePeople,  with  me.  After  the  Sacrament, could  fcarcely 
get  home,  tho*  it  was  not  more  than  20  Rods ;  but  was  fup- 
ported  and  led  by  my  Friends,  and  laid  on  my  Bed  ;  where  I 
lay  in  Pain  'till  fomeTime  in  the  Evening  ;  and  then  was  able 
to  fit  up  and  difcourfe  withFriends.  Oh, how  was  thisDay  fpent 
in  Prayers  and  Praifes  among  my  dearPeople  !  One  might  hear 
them,  all  the  Morning,  before  publick  Worfhip,  and  in  the 
Evening,  'till  near  Midnight,  praying  and  tinging  Praifes  to 
God,  in  one  or  other  of  their  Houfes.  MySoul  was  refrefh'd, 
tho'  my  Body  was  weak. 

[  This  Week,  he  went  (  in  a  very  low  State  )  in  two  Days, 
to  £ lifabeth 'Town yio  attend  the  Meeting  of  the  Synod  thevc  : 
But  was  difappointed  by  it's  Removal  to  New-Tork.  He  con- 
tinued in  a  very  compofed  comfortable  Frame  of  Mind,  j 

Saturday,  Oi7<?5.  11.  Towards  Night  was  Seized  with  an 
Ague  ,  which  was  followed  with  a  hard  Fever,and  confiderable 
Pain  :  Was  treated  with  great  Kindnefs,  and  was  afhamed  to 
fe«  fo  much  Concern  about  fo  unworthy  a  Creature,  as  I  knew 
my  felf  to  be.  Was  in  a  comfortable  Frame  of  Mind,  wholly 
fubmifTive,  with  Regard  to  Life  or  Death,  It  was  indeed  a 
peculiar  Satisfa^ion  to  me, to  think^that  li  was  not  w^'Conccrn 

or 


5i2       JEt.  ig.  ne   LIFE 

or  Bufinefs  to  determine  whether  I  flioulJ  live  or  die.  I  like- 
wife  felt  peculiarly  fatisfied,  while  under  this  uncommon  De- 
gree of  Diforder  ;  beiog  now  fully  convinced  of  my  being  really 
weak,  and  unable  to  perform  my  Work  ;  whereas  at  other 
Times  my  Mind  was  perplex'd  with  Fears,  that  I  was  a  Mif- 
improver  of  Time,  by  conceiting  I  was  fick,  when  I  was  not 
in  Reality  fo.  Oh, how  precious  is  Time  !  And  how  guilty  it 
makes  me  feel,  when  I  think  I  have  trifled  away  and  mifim- 
proved  it,  or  ncg]e«Sled  to  fill  up  each  Part  of  it  with  Duty,  to 
the  utmoft  of  my  Ability  and  Capacity  I  • 

Lord's-Day,  6^/^^.  12.  Was  fcarce  able  to  fit  up,  in  (he 
Forenoon  ;  In  the  Afternoon,  attended  publick  Worfhip,  and 
was  in  a  compofcd  and  comfortable  Frame. 

Lord*s-Day,  Octob.  19.  Was  fcarcely  able  to  do  any  Thing 
at  all  in  the  Week  paft,  cxcep^t  that  on  Thurfday  I  rode  out 
about  four  Miles  5  at  which  Time  I  took  Cold.  As  I  was  able 
to  dolittleor  nothing,  fo  I  enjoyed  not  much  Spirituality,  or 
lively  religious  AiFedlion  ;  tho'  at  fome  Times  I  longed  much 
to  be  more  fruitful  and  full  of  heavenly  Afredtion  ;  and  was 
grieved  to  fee  the  Hours  Aide  away,  while  I  could  do  nothing 
for  God.—. Was  able,  this  Day,  to  attend  publick  Wor- 
ship. Was  compofcd  and  comfortable,  willing  either  to  die  or 
live  ;  but  found  it  hard  to  be  reconciled  to  the  Tho'ls  of  living 
IJfehfi,  Oh  that  I  might  never  live  to  be  a  Burden  to  God*s 
Creation  ;  but  that  I  might  be  allowed  to  repair  Home^  when 
my/cjourniiJg  Work  is  done. 

[  This  Week,  he  went  back  to  his  hdlam  at  Cranberry^  to 
take  fome  Care  of  their  fpiritual  and  temporal  Concerns  :  And 
was  rrnich  fpcnt  with  riding  ;  tho'  he  rode  but  a  little  Way  in 
a  Day.  ] 

Thurfday,  Octob.  23.  Went  to  my  own  Houfc,  and  fet 
Things  in  Order.  Was  very  weak,  and  fomewhat  melan- 
■cHoly  :  Laboured  to  do  fomething^  but  had  no  Strength  ;  and 
was  forced  to  lie  down  on  my  Bed,  very  folitary. 

Friiday,  Octob.  24..  Spent  the  Day  in  overfceing  and  direct- 
ing my  People,  about  mending  their  Fence,  and  fecurincf  their 
Wheat.     Found,  that  all  their  Concerns  of  a  fecular  Nature 

depended    upon  me Was    fomewhat  refrefli'd  in  the 

Evening,  having  been  able  to  do  fomething  valuable  in  the 
Day-Time.  Oh,  how  it  pair.s  me,  to  fee  Time  pafs  away, 
when  I  can  do  nothing  to  any  Purpofc  ' 

Saturdays 


c/ Mr.  David  Braiuerd.     A.D.  1746.'  213 

Saturday,  Octoh.  25.  Vifited  fome  of  my  People  ;  fpent 
fomeTime  in  writing,and  felt  much  better  inBody,than  ufual  : 
When  it  Was  near  Night,  I  felt  fo  well,  that  I  had  Tho'ts 
of  expounding  :  But  in  iheEvcning  was  much  difordcred  again, 
and  fpcnt  the  Night  in  Coughing,  and  fpifling  of  Blood. 

Lord's- Day,  Ociob.  26.  In  the  Morning,  was  exceeding 
weak  :  Spent  the  Day,  'till  near  Night,in  Pain  to  fee  my  poor 
People,  wandring  as  Sheep  not  having  a  Shepherd^  waiting  and 
hoping  to  fee  me  able  to  preach  to  them  before  Night :  It 
could  not  but  diftrefs  me,  to  fee  'em  in  this  Cafe,  and  to  find 
my  fclf  unable  to  attempt  any  Tiling  for  their fpiritual  Benefit. 
But  towardsNight,  finding  my  fclf  a  little  better,  I  call'd  them 
together  to  my  Houfe,  and  fat  down  and  read  and  expounded 

Matth,  V.  I,' —16.  ThisDifcourfe,  tho*  delivered  in  much 

Weaknefs,  wi^s  attended  with  Power  to  many  of  the  Hearers  ; 
cfpecially  what  was  fpokcn  upon  the  laftof  thofeVerfes ;  where 
I  infilled  on  the  infinite  Wrong  done  to  Religion,  by  having 
our  Light  become  Darkn/'fs^  inftcad  oi  fhining  before  Men.  As 
many  in  the  Congregation  were  nov.^  deeply  afFedled  vi-ith  a 
iienfe  of  their  Deficiency,  in  Regard  of  a  fpiritual  Converfati- 
on,  that  migkt  recommend  Religion  to  others,  and  as  a  Spirit 
of  Concern  and  Watchfujnefs  feem'd  to  be  excited  in  them  ; 
fo  there  was  one,  in  particular,  that  had  fallen  into  the  Sin  of 
Drunkennefs,  fome  Time  before,  v;ho  was  now  deeply  con- 
vinced of  his  Sin,  and  the  great  Difhonour  done  to  Religion 
by  his  Mifcondtidi,  and  difcovereda  great  Degree  of  Grief  and 
Concern  on  that  Account.  My  Soul  was  refrefli'd,  to  fee 
this.  And  tho'  1  had  no  Strength  to  fpeak  {q  much  as  I  would 
have  done,  but  was  obliged  to  lie  down  on  the  Bed  :  Yet  I  re- 
joyced  to  fee  fuchan  humbleMelting  in  theCongregation  ;  and 
that  divine  Truths,  tho'  faintly  delivered,  were  attended  with 
fo  much  Efficacy  upon  the  Auditory. 

Monday,  Octoh,  27.  ^'pent  the  Day  in  overftjeing  and 
diredling  the  Indians,  about  mending  the  Fence  round  their 
Wheat  :  Was  able  to  v/a)k  with  them,  and  contrive  their  Bu- 
fmcfs,  all  the  Forenoon.  In  the  Afternoon,  was  vifued  by  tvva 
dear  Friends, and  foent  foniel'ime  in  Converfation  with  them  ; 
towards  Night,  was  able  to  walk  out,  and  take  Care  of  the 
Indians  again.     In  the  Evening, enjoyed  a  very  peacefulFrlme. 

Tucfday,  Octoh.  28.  Roue  to  Prince-Toiun^  in  a  very  weak 
State  :  Had  fuch  a  vio]eniFever,by  the  Way,  that  I  was  forced 
to  alight  at  a  Friejid's  Houfe  ;  :.ind  lie  down  for  fume  Time. 
Near  N;^ht,\vas  vifi:eu  byM:.  Treaty  Mr.S'^jZ/.aiidhii  Wife, 

211  i 


214    -^A  29,  Tie  LIFE 

and  another  Friend  :  My  Spirits  were  refrefh'd,  to  fee  them  ; 
but  I  was  furprized,  and  even  afhamed,  that  they  had  taken  fo 
muchPains  as  to  ride3o  or  4oMiles  to  fee  me  !  Was  able.to  fit 
up  moft  of  the  Evening  ;  and  fpent  the  Time  in  a  very  com- 
fortable Manner  with  my  Friends. 

Wednefday,  Octob.  29.  Rode  about  1 0  Miles,  with  my 
Friends  that  came  Yefterday  to  fee  me  ;  and  then  parted  with 
them,  all  but  one,  who  ftay'd  on  Purpofe  to  keep  me  Compa- 
ny, and  cheer  my  Spirits.  Was  extreme  weak,  and  very 
fcvcrifh,  efpecialiy  towards  Night  5  but  enjoyed  Comfort  and 
Satisfadtion. 

Thurfday,  OSiob.  30.  Rode  3  or  4  Miles, to  vifit  Mr,Walgs  : 
Spent  fomeTime,in  an  agreableManner^in  Converfation  ;  and 
tho'  extreme  weak,  enjoyed  a  comfortable  compofed  Frame  of 
Mind. 

Friday,  Ociob.  31.  Spent  the  Day  amongFriends,in  a  com- 
fortable Frame  of  Mind,  tho*  exceeding  weak,  and  under  a 
confiderable  Fever. 

Saturday,  JS'ovsmber  i.  Took  Leave  of  Friends,  after 
having  fpent  the  Forenoon  with  them,  and  returned  Home  to 
my  own  Houfe.  Was  much  difordered  in  the  Evening,  and 
opprefs'd  with  my  Cough  5  which  has  now  been  conftant  for  a 
long  Time,  wiih  a  hard  Pain  in  my  Breafl,  and  Fever. 

Lord'i-Day,  Nov.  2.  Was  unable  to  preach,  and  fcarcely 
able  to  fi^  up,  the  whole  Day.  Was  grieved,  and  almofl  funk, 
to  fee  my  poor  People  deftituie  of  the  Means  of  Grace  ;  efpe- 
cialiy confidering  they  could  not  read,  and  {o  were  under  great 
Difad vantages  for  (pending  theSabbath  comfortably.  Oh,me- 
thought,  Icould  be  contented  to  be  fick,  if  my  poor  Flock  had 
a  faithful  Pafior  to  feed  the^n  with  fpiritual  Knowledge  I  A 
View  of  their  Want  of  this  was  more  affli<2ive  to  me,  than  all 
my  bodily  Jllnefs. 

Monday,  AW.  3.  Being  now  in  io  weak  and  low  a  State, 
that  I  was  utterly  uncapable  of  performing  my  Work,  and  hav- 
ing little  Hope  of  Recovery,  unlefs  by  much  Riding,  I  thought 
it  myDut^  to  take  a  lengthy  Journey  into  New-  England  yZnd  to 
divert  my  fclf  among,  my  Friends,  whom  I  had  not  nowfcenfor  a 
longTime.     And  accordingly  took  leave  of  my  Congregatioa 

this  Day.. Before  I  left  my  People,  I  vifited  them  all  in 

iheir  refpc<^iveHoufes,and  difcourfed  to  each  one,  as  I  thought 
moft  proper  and  fuitable  for  their  Circumftances,  and  found 
great  Freedcm  2nd  Affif^ancein  fo  doing:  I  fcarcely  left  one 
Houfe  but  feme  were  inTearsj  and  many  were  not  only  afFeiSed 

with 


of  Mr.  David  Braincfd;    A.D.  174^.     2j^ 

with  my  being  about  to  leave  them,  but  with  the  folemn  Ad- 
drejfes  1  made  them  upon  divine  Things ;  for  I  was  helped  to 
be  fervent  in  Spirit^  while  I  difcourfed  to  them.  When  I  had 
thus  gone  through  my  Congregation  (  which  took  me  moft  of 
iheDay  )  ani  had  taken  leave  of  them,  and  of  the  School,  I  left 
Home,  and  rode  about  two  Miles,  to  the  Houfe  where  I  lived 
in  the  Summer  paft,  and  there  lodg'd.  Was  refrefh'd,  this 
Evening,  in  that  I  had  left  myCongregation  fo  well  difpofedand 
afFede^,  and  that  1  had  been  fo  much  alTifted  in  making  my 
Farevvel-AddrefTes  to  them. 

Tuefday,  Nov.  4»  Rode  to  TVoodbridgef  and  lodg'd  with 
Mr.  Pierfon  ;  continuing  ftill  in  a  very  weak  State. 

Wednefday,  Nov.  5.  Rode  to  Elifaheih-Town  ;  intending,' 
as  fcon  as  pofliblejto  profecute  my  Journey  intoNew- England . 
But  was,  in  anHouror  two  after  myArrival, taken  much  worfe. 

After  this,  for  near  a  Week,  was  confined  to  my  Chamber, 
and  molt  of  the  Time  to  my  Bed  ;  And  then  fo  far  revived  as 
to  be  able  to  walk  about  the  Houfe  j  but  was  ftill  confined 
within  Doors. 

In  the  Beginning  of  this  extraordinary  Turn  of  Diforder,after 
my  coming  to  Eilfabeth-Town^  I  was  enabled  thro'  Mercy  to 
maintain  a  calm  compofed  and  patient  Spirit,  as  I  had  beea 
before  from  the  Beginning  of  my  Weaknefs.  After  I  had  been 
in  Elifahah:Town  about  a  Fortnight,  and  had  io  far  recovered 
that  I  was  able  to  walk  about  Houfe,  upon  a  Day  of  7'hankf- 
givingkeptin  this  Place,  I  was  enabled  to  recall  and  recount 
over  the  Mercies  of  God,  in  fuch  a  Manner  as  greatly  afFe<5led 
me,  and  fill'd  me  ( I  think  )  with  Thankfulnefs  and  Praife  to 
God  :  Efpecially  my  Soul  prais'd  him  for  his  Work  of  Grace 
among  the  Indians^  and  the  Enlargement  of  his  dearKingdom  : 
My  Soul  blefs'dGod  for  what  he  is  in  himfelf,  and  adored  him=> 
that  he  ever  would  difplay  himfelf  to  Creatures  :  I  rejoyced, 
that  he  was  God,  and  longed  that  all  fhould  know  it,  and  feci 
it,  and  rejoyce  in  it.  Lord^  glorify  ihy  [elf^  was  the  Defire  and 
Cry  of  my  Soul.  Oh  that  all  People  might  love  and  praife  the 
ble/Ted  God  :  That. he  might  have  all  poffiblc  Honour  an^. 
Glory  from  the  intelligent  World.  * 

After  thiscomfortableThankfgiving-Seafon,  I  frequently  en- 
joyed Freedom  and  Enlargement  and  Engagcdnefs  of  Soul  in 


*  About  this  Time  he   wrote  .the  yih  Letier,  publifhcd  at 
the  End  of  this  Account  of  his  Life. 

F  f  Prayer, 


2i6     Mf.  2g.  fl^e  LIFE 

Prayer,  and  was  enabled  to  intercede  with  God  for  my  dear 
Congregation,  very  often  for  every  Family,  and  every  Perfon, 
in  particular  ;  and  it  was  often  a  great  Comfort  to  me,  that  I 
could  pray  heartily  to  God  for  thofcjto  whom  I  could  not  fpeak, 
and  whom  I  was  not  allowed  to  fee.  But  at  other  Times,  my 
Spirits  were  fo  flat  and  low,  and  my  bodily  Vigoar  To  much 
wafted,  that  I  had  fcarce  any  Affedtiens  at  all. 

In  December,  I  had  revived  fo  far  as  to  be  able  to  walk  abroad, 
and  vifit  Friends,  and  fecm*d  to  be  on  the  gaining  Hand  with 
Regard  to  myHealth,  inthe  main,umil  Lord's- Day  D^fm^.2i. 
At  which  Time  I  went  to  the  piblick  Worlhip  ;  ind  it  being 
Sacrament- Day,  I  laboured  much,  at  the  Lord's-Table,  to 
bring  forth  a  certain  Corruption,  and  have  lijlaitty  as  beiiig  an 
Emmy  to  God  and  my  own  Soul ;  and  could  not  but  hope,that 
I  had  gain'd  fome  Strength  againft  this,  as  well  as  other  Corrup- 
tions ;  and  felt  fome  Brokennefs  of  Heart  for  my  Srn. 

After  this,  having  perhaps  taken  fome  Cold,  I  began  to  de- 
cline as  to  bodily  Health  j  and  continued  todofo,  *till  the  latter 
End  of  January^  1746,7'  And  having  a  violent  Cough,  a  con- 
iiderable  Fever,  and  afthmatick  Difordcr,  and  no  Appetite  for 
any  Manner  of  Food,  nor  any  Power  of  Digeftion,  I  was  re- 
duced to  fo  low  a  State,  that  my  Friends  ( I  believe  )  generally 
defpaired  of  my  Life  ;  and  fome  of  them,  for  fome  Time  toge- 
ther,thought  I  could  fcarce  liveaDay  to  an  End.  In  this  Time, 
I  could  think  of  nothing  with  any  Application  of  Mind,  and 
feemed  to  be  in  a  great  Meafure  void  of  all  AffecSlion,  and  was 
cxercifed  with  greatTemptations  i  but  yet  was  not,  ordinarily, 
afraid  of  Death. 

On  L«rd's-Day,  Fsb.  r.  Tho'  in  a  very  weak  and  IbwState, 
I  enjoyed  a  confidetablc  deal  of  Comfort  and  Swectnefs  in  divine 
Things  ;  and  was  enabled  to  plead  and  ufe  Arguments  with 
God  in  Prayer,  I  think,with  a  Child-like  Spirit.  That  PafTagc 
of  Scripture  occur'd  to  my  Mind,  and  gave  me  greatAfliftancc, 
Jfjty  bting  Evily  know  btw  ig  ghi  gtoel  Gifts  to  your  Children^ 
how  much  man  luili  ycur  heavenly  JJaihtr  givt  the  holy  Spirit  to 
them  that  ofk  bim  ?  This  Text  1  was  help'd  to  plead,  and  infift 
upon  ;  and  law  the  divineFaithfulnefs  engaged  for  dealing  with 
me  better  than  any  earthly  Parent  can  do  with  his  Child.  This 
Scafon  fo  refrefh'd  my  Soul,  that  my  Body  fcem'd  ajfo  to  be  a 
Gainer  by  it.  And  from  thisTime,  I  began  gradually  to  amend. 
And  ss  1  recovered  fome  Strength,  Vigour  and  Spirit,  I  found 
At  Times  foruq  Freedgm  and  Life  in  the  Excrcifes  of  Devotion, 
and  (ims  Longings  after  Spirituality  and  a  Life  of  Ufefulnefs  to 

the 


of  Mr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1 747.    \  i  y 

the  Interefts  of  the  great  Redeemer  :  Altho*  at  other  Times,  I 
was  awfully  barren  and  iifelefs,  and  out  of  Frame  for  the 
Things  of  God  i  fothat  I  was  ready  often  to  cry  out,  Oh  that 
it  wsn  with  me  as  in  Months  paft  !  Oh  that  God  had  taken  me 
away  in  the  midft  of  my  Ufcfulnefs,  with  a  fudden  Itroke,  that 
I  might  not  have  been  under  a  necelHty  of  trifling  awayTime  ixi 
Diverfions !  Oh  that  I  had  never  lived  to  fpend  fa  much  pre- 
cious Time,  in  fo  poor  a  Manner,  and  to  fo  Ifttle  Purpofe  [ 
Thus  I  often  reflected,  was  grieved,  afhamed  and  even  con* 
founded,  ftjnk  and  difcouraged. 

On  Tuefday,  Feb.  24.  I  was  able  to  ride  as  far  as  Newark^ 
(  having  been  confined  within  Eiifaheth-Town  almoft  fotir 
Months)  and  the  next  Day  returned  to  EUfobeth'Toxvn.  My 
Spirits  were  fomewhat  refrefh'd  with  the  Ride,  tho'  my  Body 
was  weary. 

On  Saturday,  Feh»  18.  Was  vifitei  by  an  Indian  of  my 
own  Congregation  ;  who  brought  me  Letters,  and  goodNews 
of  the  fober  and  good  Behaviour  of  my  People,  in  general : 
This  refrelh'd  my  Soul ;  I  could  not  bat  foon  retire,  and  blcf& 
God  for  his  Goodncfs ;  tnd  found,  I  truft,  a  truly  thankfu' 
Frame  of  Spirit,  that  God  feem'd  to  be  building  up  that  Con- 
gregatioD  for  himfelf. 

On  Wednefday,  March  4,  I  met  with  Reproof  from  a 
Friend,  which,  altho'  I  thought  I  did  not  defcrve  it  from  him, 
yet  was  (  I  truft  )  blefs'd  of  God  to  make  me  more  tenderly 
afraid  of  Sin,  m^osc  jealous  over  my  felf,  and  more  concerned 
to  keep  both  Heart  and  Life  pure  ind  urkblameable  :  Itlikewife 
caufed  me  torcflc<5t  en  my  paft  Deadnefs,  and  want  of  Spiritu- 
ality, and  to  abhor  my  felf,  ind  look  on  my  felf  moft  unworthy. 
This  Frame  of  Mind  continued  the  next  Day  ;  and  for  feveral 
Days  after,  I  grieved,  to  think,  that  in  my  necefTaryDiverfions 
I  had  not  maintained  more  Serioufnefs,  Solemnity,  heavenly 
AflFe(5tion  and  Converfation.  And  thus  my  Spirits  were  often 
deprefs*d  and  funk,  and  yet,  I  truft,  that  Reproof  w?,s  mad«  to 
be  beneficial  to  me. 

Wednefday,  March  11.  Being  kept  in  Elifaheth-Town  as  a 
Day  of  Fafting  and  Prayer,  I  was  able  to  attend  pubiick  Wor- 
ihip  ;  which  was  the  firftTime  I  was  able  fo  to  do  ^fter Dec.  21. 
Oh,  how  much  Weaknefs  and  Diftrefs  did  God  carry  me  thro' 
in  this  Space  of  Time  !  But  having  obtained  Help  from  him,  1 
yet  live  :  Oh'  that  I  could  live  more  to  his  Glory. 

Lord's- Day,  March  15.  Was  able  again  to  attend  the 
Dublick  Worftiip,  and  felt  fome  carneft  Deikes  of  being  re- 
'  F  f  2  ftored 


2i8    2EL7.9:  "The  LIFE 

ficred  to  the  Miniflerial  Work  :  Felt,  I  think,  fomc  Spirit 
and  Life,  to  fpeak  for  God. 

Wcdnefday,  March  18.  Rode  out  with  a  Defign  to  vlfit  my 
People  :  And  the  next  Day  arrived  among  them  :  Was  under 
great  Deje6lion  in  my  Journey. 

On  Friday-Morning,  1  rofe  early,  walk'd  about  among  my 
People,  and  inquired  into  their  State  and  Concerns  ;  and  found 
an  additional  Weight  and  Burden  on  my  Spirits,  upon  hearing 
fame  Things  difagrceable.  1  endeavour'd  to  go  to  God  with 
my  DiflrefTcs,  T^n^A  made  feme  kind  of  lamentable  Complaint  ; 
and  in  a  broken  Manner  fpread  my  Difficulties  before  God  ; 
but  notwiihftanding:,  myMind  continued  very  gloomy.  About 
ten  o'clock,  I  calPd  my  People  together,  and  after  having  ex- 
piain'd  and  fung  a  Pfalm,  I  pray'd  with  them.*  There  was  a 
Gonfiderable  deal  of  Afle61:ion  among  them  ;  I  doubt  not,  in 
fome  Inftances,  that  which  was  more  than  mecrly  natural. 

[  This  was  the  ISji  Interview^  that  lie  ever  had  with  his 
People.  About  II  o'clock  the  fame  Day,  he  left 'em  ;  and 
the  next  Day,  came  to  EUfabeih-Town  y  his  Melancholy  re- 
maining flill  :  A.nd  he  continued  for  a  confidefable  Time  under 
a  great  Degree  of  Dejection  thro'  vapoury  Diforders,  ] 

Saturday,  March  28.  Was  taken  this  Morning  with  violent 
griping  Pains.  Thcfc  Pains  were  extreme,  and  conftant,  for 
ieveral  Hours  ;  fo  that  it  fcem'd  impoffible  for  me,  without 
a  Miracle,  to  live  24  Hours  in  fuch  Diftrefs.  I  lay  confined 
to  i:iy  Bed,  the  v/hole  Day,  and  in  diflrcfiing  Pain,  all  the 
former  Part  of  it :  But  it  plealed  God  to  blefs  Means  for  the 
abatement  of  my  DiRrefa.  Was  exceedingly  weaken'd  by  this 
Pain,  and  continued  fo  for  feveral  Days  following  ;  beiir.g  ex- 
crcifed  with  a  Fevef,  Cough,  2nd  nocSlurnal  Sweats.  In  this 
tjiftrcffed  Cafe,  fo  long  as  my  Head  was  free  of  vapoury  Con- 
fufions,  Death  appeared  agreeable  to  me  ;  i  look'don  it  as  the 
Knd  of  Toils,  and  an  Entrance  into  a  Place  where  the  ivcary 
are  at  refi  ;  and,  1  think,  i  had  fome  Rcliflx  of  the  Entertain- 
ments of  the  heavenly  State  ;  lo  that  by  thefe  I  was  allured  and 
drawn, as  well  as  driven  by  thcFatlgues  of  Life.  Oh, how  happy 
it  is,  to  be  drawn  by  Dcfircs  of  a  State  of  perfect  Holinefs  ! 

Saturday,  yj'/f/j/ 4.  Was  funk  and  dejccied,  very  rcftlefs  and 
uncafy,  by  Reafon  of  the  Miliinprovement  of  Time  ;  and  yet 
knew  not  what  to  do  :  i  longed  to  Ipend  Time  in  Fafting  and 
Prayer,  that  I  miijbt  be  delivered  from  Indolence  and  Coldncfs 

in 


e?/ Mr.  David  Bralnerd."     A.D.  1747.     210 

in  the  Things  of  God  ;  but  alas,  I  had  not  bodily  Strength 
for  thefeExercifes!  Oh,  how  blefTed  a  Thing  is  it,  to  enjoy 
Peace  of  Confcience  !  But  how  dreadful  is  a  Want  of  inward 
Peace  and  Compofure  of  Soul  !  'Tis  impoflible,  I  find,  to  en- 
joy this  Happinefs  without  redeeming  Time^  and  maintaining  a 
fpiritual  Frame  of  Mind. 

Lord's-Day,  April  5.  It  grieved  me,  to  find  my  felf  (q  in- 
conceivably barren.  My  Soul  thirfted  for  Grace  :  But  alas, 
how  far  was  I  from  obtaining  what  I  faw  fo  exceeding  excellent! 
I  was  ready  to  defpair  of  ever  being  a  holy  Creature  ;  and  yet 
my  Soul  wasdefirousof /o//!7«;i;7^  bard  after  God  ^  but  never 
did  I  fee  my  felf  fo  far  from  having  apprehended^  or  being  already 
p^r/>^f?,  as  at  this  Time.  The  Lord's  Supper  being  this  Day 
adminiftred,  I  attended  the  Ordinance  :  And  tho*  I  faw  in  mv 
felf  a  dreadful  Emptincfs,  and  want  of  Grace,  and  faw  my  felf 
as  it  were  at  an  infinite  Diftance  from  that  Purity,  which  is 
becoming  the  Gofpel  ;  yet  in  the  Seafon  of  Communion,  efpe- 
cially  in  the  Time  of  the  Diftribution  of  the  Bread,  I  enjoyed 
fome  Warmth  of  Affe6lion,  and  felt  a  tender  Love  to  the  Bre- 
thren ;  and,  f  think,  to  the  glorious  Redeemer,  the  Firji-hom 
among  them.  I  endeavoured  then  to  bring  forth  mine  and /^/j 
Enemies,  andfiay  them  before  him  ;  and  found  great  Freedom  in 
begging  Deliverance  from  this  fpiritual  Death,  as  well  as  in 
afking  divine  Favours  for  my  Friends,  and  Congregation,  and 
the  Church  of  Chrift  in  general. 

TuefJay,  April  j.  In  the  Afternoon,  to^t  to  Newark^  in 
order  to  marry  the  Rev.  Mr.  Dickinfon  f  ;  and  in  theEvening, 
performed  that  Work.  Afterwards,  rode  home  to  Elifabeth- 
Town,  in  a  pleafant  Frame,  full  of  Compofure  and  SweetneG. 


f  The  late  learned  and  very  excellent  Mr.  Jonathan 
Dickinson,  Paftor  of  a  Church  in  Elifabeth-Town,?iC'' 
fident  of  the  College  of  New-Jerfey,  and  one  of  theCorr^f- 
pondents  of  the  honourable  Society  in  Scotland  for  propa- 
gating Chriftian  Knowledge  :  Who  had  a  great  Efteem 
for  Mr.  Brainerd,  and  had  kindly  entertained  him  in  his 
Houfe  during  his  Sicknefs  in  the  Winter  paft ;  and  who, 
after  afhort  Illnefs,died  in  the  next  cnfuing  O^ober,  tw* 
Days  after  Mr.  Braimrd, 

Thurfday, 


2  20  Mt.  29;        "tht  LIFE 

Thurfday,  April  9.  Attended  the  Ordination  of  Mr.Tuder* 
and  afterwards  the  Examination  of  Mr.  Smith  :  Was  in  a  com- 
fortable Frame  of  Mind  this  Day,  and  felt  my  Heart,  I  think, 
fometiraes  in  a  fpiritual  P'rame. 

Friday,  Jpril  10.  Spent  the  Forenoon  in  Prejbyterial  Bufi- 
ncfs :  In  the  Afternoon,  rode  to  Eli/abeth-Town  ;  found  my 
BroiJier  John  there  ;  J  Spent  fome  Time  in  Converfation  with 
him  ;  but  was  extreme  weak  and  out-donje,  my  Spirits  confi* 
derably  funk,  and  my  Mind  dejedled. 

Monday,  y//>r// 13.  Affifted  in  exam4ning  my  5rtf//^^r.  In 
the  Evening,  was  in  a  folemn  devout  Frame  ;  but  was  much 
overdoi>e  and  oppiefsM  with  a  violent  Head-ach. 

Tuefd^y,  Jpril  14.  Was  able  to  do  little  ornothing  :  Spent 
fo:Tie  Time  with  Mr.  Byram  and  other  Friends.  This  Day 
my  Brother  went  to  my  People. 

VVednefday,  Jpril  15.  Found  fome  Freedom  at  theThrone 
of  Grace,  feveril  Times  this  Day.  In  the  Afternoon,  was  very 
weak,  and  (pent  the  Time  to  very  little  Purpofe  ;  and  yet  in 
the  Evening,  had  (  I  thought )  fome  religious  Warmth  and  fpi- 
xitual  Defires  in  Prayer :  MySoul  feem*d  to  go  forth  afterGod, 
and  take  Complacence  in  his  divine  Perfe6lions.  But  alas, 
afterwards  awfully  letdown  my  Watch,  and  grew  carelefs  and 
fee  u  re. 

Thurfday,  Jpril  16.  Was  in  bitter  Anguifh  of  Soul,  in  the 

Morning,  fuch  as  I  have  fcarce  ever  felt,  with    a  Senfe  of  Sin 

and  Guilt.     I  continued  in  Diftrefs  the  whole  Day,  attempting 

^ to 

*  A  worthy  pious  young  Gentl&man  ;  who  lived  in  theMi- 
jpiiftry  but  a  very  ihort  Time :  He  died  at  Stratfield  in 
Connecticut ^iht December  following  hisOrdination  ;  being  a 
little  while  after  Mr.  Brainerd's  De^ih^i  Northampton, 
He  was  ^aken  ill  on  a  Journey, returning  from  a Vifit  to  his 
Friends  at  J'Jilton  (  in  the  Majfachufetti  )  which,  as  I  take 
it, was  his  native  ?hQQ^^n<^Har yard- College  {h^?\d,QC  of  his 
Education. 

%  This  Brother  of  his  had  been  fent  for  by  xhtCorrefpondents^ 
to  take  Care  or,and  inftru6l  Mr.  Brainerd's  Congregation 
of  Indians  ;  he  being  obliged  by  his  Illnefs  to  be  abfent 
from  them.  And  he  continued  to  take  Care  of  them  'till 
Mr.  Brainerd^s  Death  :  and  fince  his  Death,  has  been  or- 
dained his  ^ucctjfor  in  his  Miflion,  and  to  theCharge  of  his 
Congregation  ;  which  continues  much  to  flourifh  under 
his  paftoral  Cai^. 


(|/ Mr.  David  Brainerd.       A.D.1747;    221 

to  pray  whcre-ever  I  went ;  &  indeed  could  not  help  fo  doing : 
but  look'd  upon  my  felf  fo  vile,  I  dared  not  look  any  Body  in  the 
Face  ;  and  was  even  grieved,  that  any  Body  fhould  fhew  mc 
any  Refpedt,  or  at  leaft,  that  they  fhould  be  fo  deceived  as  to 
think  I  deferved  it. 

Friday,  jfprjl  17.  In  the  Evening,  could  not  but  think,that 
God  helped  me  to  draw  near  to  the  Throne  of  Grace,  tho'  moft 
unworthy,  and  gave  me  a  Senfe  of  his  Favour  ;  which  gave  me 
inexpreflibleSupport  andEncouragement ;  tho'  I  fcarcely  dared 
to  hope  the  Mercy  was  real,  it  appeared  fo  great :  Yet  could 
not  but  rcjoyce,  that  ever  God  (hould  difcover  his  reconciled 
Face  to  fuch  a  vile  Sinner.  Shame  and  Confufion,  at  Times, 
covered  mc ;  and  then  Hope  and  Joy  and  Admiration  of  divine 
Goodnefs  gain'd  the  Afcendant.  Sometimes  I  could  not  but 
admire  the  divine  Goodnefs,  that  the  Lord  had  not  let  me  fall 
into  all  the  groflefl  vileft  Ads  of  Sin  and  open  Scandal,  that 
could  be  thought  of ;  and  felt  my  felf  fo  neceffitated  to  praife 
God,  that  this  was  ready  for  a  little  while  to  fwallow  up  my 
Shame  andPrelTure  of  Spirit  on  Account  of  my  Sins. 

[  After  this,  his  Deje6lion  and  Frefiure  of  Spirit  returned  ; 
and  he  remained  under  it  the  two  next  Days.  J 

Monday,  Jpril  20.  VVas  in  a  very  difordered  State,and  kept 
my  Bed  moft  of  the  Day.  I  enjoyed  a  little  more  Comfort, than 
in  ftveral  of  the  preceeding  Days.  This  Day  I  arrived  at  the 
Age  of  29  Years. 

Tuefday,  April  21.  I  fet  out  on  my  Journey  for  New- Eng- 
land, in  order  ( if  it  might  be  the  Will  of  God  )  to  recover 
my  Health  by  riding:  Travelled  to  NewTork^  and  thece 
lodged.  * 

[  This  proved  his  final  Departure  from  New-Jerfey,^' 
He  travelled  flowly,  and  arrived  among  his  Friends  at  ^afi- 
Haddam,  about  the  beginning  of  May*  There  is  very  \\{.\\c.  Ac- 
count in  his  Diary,  of  the  Time  that  pafs'd  from  hisfetting  out 
on  this  Journey  to  May  10.  He  fpeaks  of  his  fometinies  find- 
ing his  Heart  rejoicing  in  the  glorious  Perfections  of  God,  and 
longing  to  live  to  him;  but  complains  of  the  Unfixcdncfs  of 
hisTho'ts,  and  their  being eafily  diverted  from  divine  Subjects, 
and  cries  out  of  his  Leannefs,  as  tefJifying  sgainfl  him,  in  the 
loudefl  Manner.  And  concerning  ihofe  Divcrjioni  he  was  ob- 
liged to  ufc  for  his  HeaUbj  he  fays,  that  he  fometimes  found  he 

could 


222     Mt.zo.  Sn&^LIFE 

could  ufe  Diverfions  with  fenglenefs  of  Hearty  aifning  at  the 
Glory  of  God  ;  but  that  he  alfo  found  there  was  a  Neceflity 
of  great  Care  and  Watchfulnefs,  left  he  fliould  lofe  that  fpiri- 
tual  Temper  of  Mind  in  his  Diverfions,  and  left  they  Ihould 
degenerate  into  what  was  mcerly  fclfifh,  without  any  fupremc 
Aim  at  the  Glory  of  God  in  them.  ] 

Lord's-Day,  May  lO.  (  At  Had-Lims)  I  could  not  but 
feel  fomeMeafure  of  Gratitude  to  God  ^t  thisTime  (wherein  I 
was  much  exercifed  )  that  he  had  always  difpofed  me,  in  myMi- 
niftry,to  infift  on  the  great  Dodlrines  of  Regeneration,  the  Neiw 
Creature,  Faith  in  Chri/i,  progrejjive  Sanctification,  fuprsme  Lovi 
to  God,  living  intirely  io  the  Glory  of  God,  being  not  our  own,  and 
the  like:  God  has  helped  me  to  fee,  in  the  fureft  Manner^ 
from  Time  to  Time,  that  thefe,  and  the  likeDo6lrines,neceira- 
rily  connected  with  them,  are  the^«/y  Foundation  of  Safety  and 
Salvation  for  perifhing  Sinners ;  and  that  thofe  divine  Difpofi- 
tions,  which  are  confonant  hereto,  are  that  Flolinefs,  without 
which  no  Manjhallfee  the  Lord  :  The  Exercife  of  thefeGod-likc 
Temper?,  wherein  the  Soul  adls  in  a  kind  of  Concert  with  God, 
and  would  be  and  do  every  Thing  that  is  pleafmg  to  God  ; 
This,  1  faw,  would  ftand  by  the  Soul  in  a  dying  Hour  ;  For 
God  muft,  I  think,  deny  Himfelf,  if  he  caftsaway  his  own  Imager 
even  the  Soul  that  is  one  in  Defires  with  himfelf. 

LordVDay,  May  17.  (At  Millington  )  Spent  the  Forenoon 
at  Home, being  unable  to  attend  the  pubiick  Worfhip.  At  this 
Time,  God  gave  me  iome  afFeding  Senfe  of  my  own  Vile- 
xicfs,  and  the  exceeding  Sinfulnefs  of  my  Heart ;  that  there 
feem'd  to  be  Nothing  but  Sin  and  Corruption  within  me.  Innu- 
merable Evils  compfi'dme  about ;  my  want  of  Spirituality  and 
holy  living,  my  neg!e<Stof  God, and  living  to  my  felf  —  All  the 
Abominations  of  my  Heart  and  Life  feem'd  to  be  open  to  my 
View  ;  and  1  had  nothing  to  fay,  but,  God  he  merciful  io  rne 

a  Sinfier. TowardsNcon,  1  raw,that  theGrace  of  God  in 

Chrift  is  ir.finitely  free  towards  Sinners,  and  fuch  Sinners  as  I 
was  ;  I  a!fo  faw,  that  God  is  the  fuprcam  Good,  that  in  his 
Prefence  is  Life  ;  and  I  began  to  long  to  die,  that  I  might 
hi  with  him,  in  a  ftate  of  Freedom  from  all  Sin.  Oh,  how  a 
fmall  Glimpfe  of  his  Excellency  rcfrefh'd  my  Soul  !  Oh,how 
worthy  is  the  blefted  God  to  be  lovedjadored,  and  delighted  in, 
for  himrelf,  for  his  own  divine  Excellencies. 

Tht»'  1  felt  much  Dulnefs,  and  want  of  a  Spirit  of  Prayer, 
this  Week  ;  Ye;  1  had  fgmc  Glimpfes   of  the  Excellency   of 

divine 


f/ Mr.  David  Brainerd.      A.D.174Y,     223 

divine  Things  5  and  efpecially  one  Morning,  in  fecret  Medita- 
tion and  Prayer,  the  Excellency  and  Beauty  of  Holinefs,  as  a 
Likenefs  to  the  glorious  God,  was  fo  difcovered  tome,  that  I 
began  to  long  earneftly  to  be  in  that  World  where  Holinefs 
dwells  in  Perfection  :  And  I  feem'd  to  long  for  this  perfedl 
Holinefs, not  (o  much  for  the  fake  of  my  own  Happinefs  (altho' 
I  faw  clearly  that  this  was  the  greateft,  yea, the  only  Happinefs 
of  the  Soul  )  as  that  I  might  pleafe  God,  live  in#rely  to  him, 
and  glorify  him  to  the  utmoft  Stretch  of  my  rational  Powers 
and  Capacities. 

Lord's- Day,  May  2^,  (At  Long- Meadow  in  Springfield) 
Could  not  but  think,  as  I  have  often  remarked  to  others,  that 
much  more  of  true  Religion  confifts  in  deep  Humility ^  Brokennefs 
tf  Hearty  and  an  aiafing  Senfe  of  Barrennefs  and  want  of  Grace 
end  Holinefs,  than  moft  who  are  called  Chri/iians,  imagine  ; 
efpecially  thofe  who  have  been  efteemed  the  Converts  of  the 
late  Day  ;  many  of  whom  feem  to  know  of  no  other  Religion 
but  elevated  Joys  and  Affe6iiom^  ariling  only  from  fome  Flights 
of  Imagination ^iix  fome  Huggeflion  made  to  theirMind,  of  Chri(l^% 
being  /^«>'/,God's  loving  them^  and  the  like. 

[  On  Thurfday,  May  28.  He  came  from  Long- Meadoiv  to 
Northampton  ;  appearing  vaftly  better  than,  by  his  Account, 
he  had  beenia  the  Winter  ;  indeed  fo  well,  that  he  was  able  to 
ride  25  Miles  in  a  Day,and  to  walk  half  a  Mile  ;  and  appeared 
chearful,  and. free  from  Melancholy  :  But  yet  undoubtedly, 
at  that  Time,  in  a  confirmed,  incurable  Confumption. 

I  had  had  much  Opportunity,  before  this, of  particular  Infor- 
mation concerning  him,  from  many  that  were  well  acquainted 
with  him  ;  and  had  my  felf  once  anOpportunity  of  conliderable 
Converfation  and  fome  Acquaintance  with  \{\v[\^ziNew-  Haven ^ 
near  four  Years  before,  in  the  Time  of  the  Commencement  when 
he  offered  that  Confcffion  to  the  Redtor  of  the  College,  that 
has  been  already  mentionM  in  this  Hiftory  ;  I  being  one  he  was 
pleafed  then  feveral  Times  to  confult  on  that  Affair  :  But  novi^ 
1  had  Opportunity  for  a  more  full  Acquaintance  with  hirn.  I 
found  him  remarkably  fociab]e,pleafant,  and  entertaining  in  his 
Converfation  ;  yet  folid,  fiwoury,  fpiritual,  and  very  profitable  ; 
appearing  meek,  modeft,  and  humble,  far  from  any  Stiffnefs, 
Morofenefs,  fuperftitious  Demurenefs,  or  affcded  Singularity 
in  Speech  orBehaviour,and  feeming  to  naufeate  ail  fuch  Thirgs. 
We  enjoyed  not  only  the  Benefit  of  his  Converfation,  but  had 
the  Comfort  and  Advantage  of  hearing  him  pray  in  theFamily; 

G  2  ^ro™ 


224     ^/.  30.  The  LIFE 

fr(5m  Time  to  Time.  His  Manner  of  praying'  was  very  agre- 
able  ;  molt  becoming  a  Worm  of  the  Duft,  and  a  Difciple  of 
Chrift,  addreffing  to  an  infinitely  c;reat  and  holy  God,  and  Fa- 
ther of  Mercies  ;  not  with  florid  Expreflions,  or  a  ftudy'd  Elo- 
quence }  not  with  any  intemperate  V^ehemence,  or  indecent 
Boldnefs  ;  at  the  greateit  Diftance  from  any  Appearance  of 
Oftentation,  and  from  every  Thing  that  might  look  as  tho'  he 
meant  to  recommend  himfelf  to  thofe  that  were  about  him,or  fet 
himfelf  ofF  to  their  Acceptance ;  free  too  from  vainRcpetitions, 
without  imperinentExcurfionsjOr  needlefsmultiplyingofWords. 
HeexprelFed  himfelf  with  the  Itndleft  Propriety,  with  Weight, 
and  Pungency  ;  and  yet  what  his  Lips  uttered  feem'd  to  flow 
from  x\iQfulnefi  of  his  Heart,  as  deeply  impreflTed  with  a  great 
and  folemn  Senfe  of  our  Neceflities,  Unworthinefs,  and  Depen- 
dance,  and  of  God's  infinite  Greatnefs,  Excellency  and  Suffi- 
ciency, rather  than  meerly  from  a  warm  and  fruitful  Brain, 
pouring  out  good  Expreflions.  And  I  know  not,  that  ever  I 
heard  him  (o  much  as  afk  a  BleiTm  5  or  return  Thanks  at  Table, 
but  there  was  fumething  remarkable,  to  be  obferved  both  in  the 
Matter  and  Manner  of  the  Performance.  In  his  Prayers,  he 
infifted  much  on  the  Profperity  of  Xion^  the  Advancement  of 
Chrift's  Kingdom  in  the  World,  and  the  Flourifhing  and  Pro- 
pagation of  Religion  among  the  Indians*  And  he  generally 
made  it  one  Petition  in  his  VtzyfLX^that  we  might  not  out- Jive  our 
Vfefulnefs,] 

Lord's-Day,  May  31.  [At  Ncrthamptotty]  I  had  little  inward 
Sweetnefs  in  Religion,  moft  of  the  Week  paft  ;  not  realifing 
and  beholding  fpintually  thcGIory  ofQod^andthe  hleJfedRedeemer ; 
from  whence  always  arife  my  Comforts  and  Joys  m  Religion,  if 
I  have  any  at  all :  And  if  f  can't  io  behold  the  Excellencies  and 
Perfe6tions  of  God,  as  to  caufe  me  to  rejoyce  in  him  fcr  what 
he  is  in  himfelf^  I  have  no  folidFoundition  f  irjoy.  To  rcjcyce, 
only  bccauie  I  apprehend  I  have  an  Intereji  in  Ckrijly  and  fhall 
be  finally  faved,  is  a  poor  mean  Bufinefs  indeed. 

[  This  Week,  he  confulted  Dr.  Mather^  at  my  Floufe,  con- 
cerning his  Illnefs  ;  who  plainly  told  him,  that  there  were  great 
Evidences  of  his  being  in  a  confirmed  Confumptiony  and  that 
he  could  give  him  110  Encouragement,  that  he  (hould  ever  re- 
cover. But  it  fecmed  not  to  occafion  the  leaft  Difcompofure 
in  him,  nor  to  make  any  Manner  of  Alteration  as  to  theCJhear- 
fulrcfs  and  Serenity  of  his  Mind,  or  the  Freedam  or  Pieafant- 
iiefsofhij  Converfation.j 

Lord  V  Day, 


o/ Mr.  David  Brain crd:      A.  D.  1747.'     225 

Lord*s-Day,  J«w^  7.  My  Attention  wa^  greatly  engaged, 
and  my  Soul  (o  drawn  forth,  this  Day,  by  what  I  heard  ot  the 
exceeding  Precioujntfs  of  the  faving  Grace  of  Goo's  Spirit^  thai  it 
almoft overcame  my  Body,  in  my  weak  State:  I  faw,  that  true 
Grace  is  exceeding  precious  indeed  ;  that  it  is  very  rare  ;  and 
that  there  is  but  a  very  fmall  Degree  of  it,  even  where  the 
Reality  of  it  is  to  be  found  ;  at  leaft,  I  faw  this  to  b^  my  Cafe. 

In  the  preceeding  Week,  I  enjoyed  fome  comfortable  Seafons 
of  Meditation.  One  Morning,  the  Caufe  of  God  appeared 
exceeding  precious  to  me  :  The  Redeemer'sfCingdom  is  all  that 
is  valuable  in  the  Earth,  and  I  could  -noTbut  Jong  for  the  Pro- 
motion of  it  in  the  World  :  I  faw  alfo,  thn  this  Caufe  is  God's, 
that  he  has  an  infinitely  greater  Regard  and  Concern  for  it, 
than  I  could  pofTibly  have  ;  that  if  I  have  any  true  Love  to  this 
blefTed  Intereft,  it  is  only  a  Drop  derive:^  from  that  Ocean. 
Hence,  I  was  ready  to  lifiup  my  Head  with  Joy  ;  and  conclude, 
IFeli,  if  God's  Caufe  be  fo  dear  and  precious  to  him^  he  will  promote 
it.  And  thus  I  did  as  it  were  reft  on  God, that  furely  he  would 
promote  that  which  was  (o  agreable  to  his  own  will  ;  tho'  the 
Time,  when,  muft  ftill  be  left  to  his  fovereign  Pleafure. 

[  He  was  advifed  by  Phyficians  flill  to  continue  Riding,  as 
what  would  tend,  above  any  other  Means,  to  prolong  his  Life. 
He  was  at  a  Lofs,  for  fomeTime,  which  Way  to  bend  hisCourfe 
next  j  but  finally  determined  to  ride  from  hence  to  Bojlon  ;  we 
having  concluded  that  One  of  this  Family  fhould  go  with  him, 
and  be  helpful  to  him  in  his  weak  and  low  State.  ] 

Tuefday,  June  9.  [  fet  out  on  a  Journey  from  Northampton 
to  Boflon  :  Travelled  flowly,  and  got  fome  Acquaintance  with 
divers  Minifters  on  the  Road. 

I  having  now  continued  to  ride  for  fome  confiGerable  Tims 
together,  felt  my  felf  much  better  than  I  bad  formerly  done  ; 
and  I  found,  that  in  Proportion  to  the  Profpea  I  had  of  bein^ 
reftored  to  a  State  of  Ufefulnefs,  fo  Idefired  the  Continuance 
of  Life:  ButD^a/^  appear'd  inconceivably  more  defirable  to 
me,  than  a  ufelefs  Life  ;  yet  blefied  be  God,  I  found  my  Heart, 
at  Times,  fully  refigned  and  reconciled  to  this  greateit  of  M- 
ilidions,  if  God  faw  fit  thus  to  deal  with  me. 

Friday,  June  12.  I  arrived  in  Bcflon  this  Day,  fcmewhat  fa- 
tigued with  my  Journey.  Obferved,  that  there  is  no  ReJ},  but 
in  God  :  Fatigues  of  fiody,  and  Anxieties  of  Mind  attend  uif, 
both  in  Town  and  Country  ;  no  Place  is  exempted. 

'G  g  a  I^of^^  S'Day, 


\i6      Ml  30:  K^  L  I  F  E 

Lord's-Day,  June  14.  I  enjoyed  fome  Enlargement  &Sweet- 
nefs  in  Family-Prayer,  as  well  as  in  fecrct  Exercifes ;  Godap- 
pear'd  excellent,  his  Ways  full  of  Pleafure  and  Peace,  and  all 
I  wanted  was  a  Spirit  of  holy  Fervency,  to  live  to  him. 

Wednefday,  June  17.  This,  and  the  two  prcceeding  Days, 
I  fpent  mainly  in  vifiting  the  Minifters  of  the  Town,  and  was 
treated  with  great  Refpedl  by  them. 

On  Thttrfday,ytt«^  i8. 1  was  taken  exceeding  ill,and  bro't  to 
the  Gates  of  Death, by  the  breaking  of  fmallUlcers  in  my  Lungs, 
as  my  Phyfician  fuppofed.  In  this  extreme  weak  State  I  conti- 
nued for  feveral  Weeks,  and  was  frequently  reduced  fo  low,  as 
to  be  utterly  Specchlefs,  and  not  able  fo  much  as  to  whifper  a 
Word;  and  even  after  I  had  fo  far  revived,  as  to  walk  about 
Houfe,  and  to  f!ep  out  of  Doors,  I  was  exercifed  every  Day 
with  a  faint  Turn,  which  continued  ufually  four  or  fiveHours; 
at  which  Times,  tho*  I  was  not  utterly  Speechlefs,  fo  but  that 
I  could  fay  Yes  or  iV<7,  yet  I  could  not  converfe  at  all,  nor  fpeak 
cne  Sentence  without  making  Stops  for  Breath  ;  and  divers 
Times  in  this  Seafon,  my  Friends  gathered  round  my  Bed,  to 
fee  me  breathe  my  laft,  which  they  iook'd'for  every  Moment, 
as  I  my  felf  ajfo  ^\<^. 

How  I  was,  the  firft  Day  or  two  of  my  Illnefs,withRegard  to 
the  Exetcifeof  i?^rtfy9//,  1  fcarcely  know  ;  but  I  believe  I  was 
fomething  fhattei'd  witn  the  Violence  of  the  Fever,  at  Times  : 
But  the  third  Diy  of  my  Illnefs,  and  conftantly  afterwards,  for 
four  or  five  Weeks  together,  I  enjoyed  as  much  Serenity  o£ 
JMind,  and  Clearrefsof  Thought,  as  perhaps  I  ever  did  in  my 
Xi''e  ;  and  I  think,  my  Mind  never  penetrated  with  fo  much 
Eafe  and  Freedom  into  divine  Things,  as  at  this  Time  j  and 
I  never  felt  fo  capable  of  demonftrating  the  Truth  of  many  im- 
portant Dc6l:ines  of  the  Gofpel  as  now.  And  as  I  faw  clearly 
the  Truth  o^  rhofe  great  Do£lrines,  which  are  juftly  fliled  the 
DOCTRINES  of  GRACE  ;  fo  I  faw  with  no  lefs  Clcarnefs, 
that  the  EJfence  of  Religion  confified  in  the  SouPs  Conformitv  to 
God,  and  ading  above  all  felfi(h  Views,  for  /;//  Glory y  longing 
to  be  for  him,  to  live  to  him,  and  pleafe  and  honour  him  in  all 
Things  ;  and  this  /rom  a  clear  View  of  his  infinite  Excellency 
andWorthiners/'/z  hirrfelf,  to  be  loved,  adored,  worfhippcd,and 
ferved  by  all  inrelh'gent  Creatuies.  Thus  I  faw, that  when  a  Soul 
/fl7^//God  with  a  fupreme  Love,  he  therein  adls  lih  the  bleiled 
God  himfelf,  v.'ho  moft  juftly  loves  himfelf  in  that  Manner : 
So  when  God's  Intereft  and  his  are  become  one,  and  he  longs 
that  Gg'J  fhould  be^/oW^^W,  and  rejoyces   to  think  that  he  is 

unchangeably 


<?/ iWir.  David  Braiflcrd.         A.D.1747.  227 

unchangeably  pofTefs'd  of  the  higheft  Glory  and  Bleffe'lnefs, 
herein  aifo  he  a£ls  mConformity  toGod:In  likeManner,w« ..  1  the 
Soul  is  fully  refigntd  Uy  and  refts  fatisfied  and  contented  ijuiih  the 
divine  Will,  liere  it  is  aifo  conformed  to  God. 

I  faw  further,  that  as  this  divine  Temper,  whereby  tb*-  Soul 
exalts  God,  and  treads  Self  in  theDuft,  is  wrought  ia  the  Soul 
by  God's  difcovering  his  own  glorious  Perfeftions  in  the  Face 
tf  Jefus  Chri/l  to  it,  by  the  fpecial  Influences  of  the  holy  Spirit, 
fo  he  cannot  but  have  Regard  to  iiy  as  his  own  Work  ;  and  as 
it  is  his  Image  in  the  Soul,  he  cannot  but  take  Deiight  in  it. 
Then  I  faw  again,  that  if  God  fhould  flight  and  rejeft  his  own 
moral  Jmage^  he  muft  needs  deny  himfelfi  which  he  cannot  do. 
And  thus  I  faw  the  Stability  and  Infallibility  of  this  Religion,and 
that  ihofc  who  afe  truly  poflTefsM  of  it,  have  the  moft  compleat 
and  fatisfying  Evidence  of  their  being  interefted  in  all  the  Be- 
nefits oi  Chrift's  Redemption,  having  their  Hearts  conformed  to 
him  j  and  that  thefe  and  thefconly  are  qualified  for  the  Employ- 
ments andEntertainments  of  God'sKingdom  of  Glory  ;  as  none 
but  thefe  have  any  Relifti  for  the  Bufinefs  of  Heaven,  which  is 
to  afcribe Glory  to  God,  and  not  to  themfelves  ;  and  that  God 
f  tho'  I  would  fpeak  it  with  great  Reverence  of  his  Name  and 
Perfe£lions}  cannot,  without  denying  himfelf,  finally  caft  fuch 
away. 

The  next  Thing  I  had  then  to  do,  was  to  enquire,  whether 
this  was  my  Religion  :  And  here  God  was  pleafed  to  help  me  to 
the  moft  eafy  Remembrance  and  critical  Review  of  what  had 
pafs'd  in  Courfe,  of  a  religious- Nature,  thro'  feveral  of  the  lat- 
ter Years  of  my  Life  :  And  altho*  I  could  difcover  much  Cor- 
ruption attending  my  beft  Duties,  many  felfifh  .Views  and  car- 
nal Ends,  much  fpiritual  Pride  and  Self-Exaltation,  and  in- 
numerable other  Evils  which  compafs'd  me  about ;  1  fay,altho' 
i  now  difcerned  the  Sins  of  my  holy  Things,  as  well  as  other 
A^ions,yet  God  was  pleafed,  as  I  was  reviewing,quickly  to  put 
this  Queftion  out  of  Doubt,  by  (hewing  me,  that  I  had,  from 
Time  to  Time,  a6^ed  above  the  utmoft  Influence  of  meer  Self- 
Love ;  that  f  had  longed  to  pleafe  and  glorify  him, as  my  higheft 
Happinefs,  tffc.  And  this  Review  was  thro'  Grace  attended 
with  a  prefent  Feeling  of  the  fame  divine  Temper  of  Mind  ;  I 
felt  now  pleafed,  to  think  of  the  Glory  of  Gcd,  and  longed  for 
Heaven,  as  a  State  wherein  I  might  glorify  God  perfedly*  ra- 
ther than  a  Place  of  Happinefs  for  my  felf  :  And  this  Feeling  of 
ehe  Love  of  God  in  my  Heart,  which  I  truft  the  Spirit  of  God 
C7«cited  la  mc  afrelh,  wastufficiwi^  to  give  mc  full  Satisfa<^Jo"» 

an<i 


228     yEt,  30.  rfc^  LIFE 

2nd  make  me  long, as  I  had  manyTimes  before  done, (0  be  with 
Chrift  .'  I  did  not  now  want  any  of  the  fudden  Sugge/i ions,  which 
many  are  (o  pleafed  wUhyThat  Chri/i  and  his  Benefits  ar^I^i  ne, 
^hat  God  laves  Me,  tffc,  in  order  to  give  me  Satis''a6tion  abouc 
my  State  :  No,  my  Soul  nowabhor'd  ihofeDelufions  of  Satan^ 
which  are  thought  to  be  the  immediaHWiinefs  of  the  Spirit^whUe 
there  is  nothing  but  an  empty  Sugge/iion  of  a  certainFad, without 
any  gracious  Difcovery  of  \ht  divine  Glory,  or  of  the  Spirit's 
IVork'm  their  ownHearts:  I  faw  the  awfulDelufion  of  this  Kind 
of  Confidences,  as  well  as  of  the  whole  of  that  Religion,  which 
they  ufually  fpring  from,  cr  at  leaft  arc  the  Attendants  of ;  the 
falfe  Religion  of  the  late  Day  (^tho*  a  Day  of  wondrousGrace) 
the  Imaginations,  and  Impreffions  made  only  on  the  animal 
AfFe(Slions,  together  with  the  fudden  Suggcftions,  made  to 
the  Mind  by  Satan,  transformed  into  an  /Ingel  of  Li^ht,  of  cer- 
tain Fa6is  not  revealed  in  Scripture  :  Thefe,  and  many  like 
Things,  I  fear,  have  made  up  the  greater  Part  of  the  religious 
Appearances  in  many  Places. 

Thefe  Things  I  faw  with  great  Clearnefs,  when  I  was  tho't 
to  be  dying.  And  God  gave  me  great  Concern  for  his  Church 
and  Intereft  in  theWorld,iat  this  Time  :  Not  fo  much  bircaufe 
the  late  remarkable  Influence  upon  the  Minds  of  People  was 
abated,  and  almoft  wholly  gone,  as  becaufe  that  falfe  Religion, 
thofe  Heats  of  Imagination,  and  wild  and  felfifli  Commotions 
of  the  animal  AfFe6tions,  which  attended  the  Work  of  Grace, 
had  prevailed  fo  far.  This  was  that  which  my  Mind  dwelt  up- 
on, almoft  D2iy  and  Night :  And  ibis,  to  me,  was  the  darkeft 
Appearance,  refpe£ting  Religion,  in  the  Land  ;  for  'twr.s  this 
chiefly,  that  had  prejudiced  the  World  againft  inward  Rfl-gion. 
And  I  faw,  the  great  Mifcryof  all  was,  thatfo  few  faw  anylvlan- 
ner  of  Difference  between  thofe  Exercifes  that  were  fpiritual  and 
holy,  and  thofe  which  have  Self-Love  only  for  their  Beginnings 
Center,  and  End. 

As  God  was  pleafed  to  afi^ord  me  Clearnefs  of  Thought,  and 
Compofure  of  Mind,  almoft  continually,  for  feveral  Weeki 
togethijer, under  my  gr^atWeaknefs  ;  fo  he  enabled  me,  in  fome 
Meafure,  to  improve  my  Time  (  as  1  hope  )  to  valuable  Pur- 
pofes.  I  was  enabled  to  write  a  Number  of  important  Letters^ 
to  Friends  in  remote  Places  *  :  And  fometimes  1  wrote  when 


*  Among  thefe  are  the  eighth,  ninth,  and  teath  Letters,  at 

the  End  of  this  Hiftory. 


«?/ ilfr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.1747.     229 

I  was  Specchlefs  ;  i.  e.  unable  to  maintain  Converfation  with 
any  Body  ;  tho'  perhaps  I  was  able  to  fpeak  a  Word  or  two  fo 
2s  to  be  heard.—  At  this  Seafon  alfo,.  while  I  was  confined  at 
B6f.Qn\,  1  read  with  Care  and  Attention  fome  Papers  of  old  Mr. 
Sh(pard's,  lately  come  to  Light,  and  defigned  for  the  Prefs  • 
And  as  I  was  deiired,  and  greatly  urged,  made  fomeCorrcdions, 
where  the  Senfe  was  left  dark,  for  want  of  a  Word  or  two — 
Befides  this,  I  had  many  Fi/ttarrts;  with  whom,  when  I  was 
able  to  fpeak,  I  always  converfed  oi  the  Things  of  Religion  ; 
and  was  peculiarly  difpofed  and  aflifted  in  diftinguifhing  between 
the  true  and  fal/e  Religion  of  theTimes :  There  was  fcarcc  any 
Subjea,  that  has  been  Matter  of  Debate  in  the  late  Day,  but 
what  I  was  at  one  Time  or  other  brought  to  a  Sortof  Neceflity 
to  difcourfe  upon,  and  (hew  myOpinion  in  ;  and  that  frequently 
beforeNumbers  of  People  ;  and  efpcciallyjdifcourfed  repeatedly 
on  the  Nature  and  NecefTity  of  that  Humiliaiion^Self' Emptinefs^ 
or  full  Convidlion  of  a  Perfon's  being  utterly  undone  in  himfelf, 
which  is  necellary  in  order  to  a  faviflg  Faith^  and  the  extreme 
Difficulty  of  being  brought  to  this,  and  the  great  Danger  there 
is  of  Perfons  taking  up  with  (oweSelf-rightaousJppearances  of  it: 
The  Danger  of  this  I  efpecially  dwelt  upoHjbeingperfwaded  that 
Multitudes  perifh  in  this  hidden  Way  ;  and  becaufe  fo  little  is 
faid  from  moft  Pulpits  to  difcovcr  any  Danger  here  :  So  that 
Perfons  being  never  efFedlually  brought  to  die  in  themfelves, 
are  never  truly  united  to  Chrift,  and  fo  perifh.  I  alfo  difcourfed 
much  on  what  I  take  to  bs  the  Eflence  of  true  Religion,  endea- 
vouring plainly  to  defcribe  that  God-iike  Temper  and  Difpofi- 
tion  of  Soul,  and  that  holy  Cjnverfation  and  Behaviour,  that 
may  juftly  claim  the  Honour  of  having  God  for  its  Original 
and  Patron.  And  I  have  Reafon  to  hope  God  blelTed  my  Way 
of  difccurfing  and  diftinguidiing,  to  forae,  both  Minifters  and 
People  ;  fo  that  my  Time  was  not  wholly  loil, 

[  He  was  much  vlfited,  while  in  Bo/Ion,  by  many  Perfjns  of 
confiderable  Note  and  l^igure,  and  of  the  beft  Charadler,  and  by 
fome  of  the  firft  Rank :  Who  (hewed  him  uncommon  Refpcdi-, 
and  appeared  highly  pleafed  and  entertained  with  hisConverfatiop, 
And  befides  his  being  honoured  with  the  Company  and  Refpedt 
cf  Minifters  of  the  Tov/n,  he  was  vifited  by  feverai  Mi- 
ni'lers  from  various  Parts  of  the  Country.  And  as  he  took 
all  Opportunities  to  difcourfe  ofthe  peculiar  Nature,  anddidin- 
i^-jidiing  Characters  of  true  fpiritualand  vital  Rtligion,  and  to 
.-ir  his  Teitimony  againft  the  various  falfe  Appearances  of  it, 

cundiing 


230      JEt.  30.  ne  LIFE 

confifting  in, or  arlfing  from  Impreffions  on  the  Imagination,and 
fudden  and  fuppofed  immediate  Suggeftions  of  Truths,  not 
contained  in  theScripture,  and  thatFaith  which  confifts  primarily 
in  a  Pef/on's  believing  that  Chri/i  died  for  him  in  particular ^hc 
So  what  he  faid  was  for  the  moft  Part  heard  wilh  uncommon 
Attention  and  Regard;  and  his  Difcourfes  and  Reafonings  ap- 
peared manifeftly  to  have  great  Weight  and  Influence,  with 
many  that  heconverfed  with,  both  Minifters  and  others.* 

Alfo  the  Honourable  Commiffioners  in  Bo/ion,  of  the  incor- 
porated Society  in  London  for  propagating  the  Gofpel  in  New- 
England  zn6  P^rts  adjacentjhaving  newly  had  committed  to  'em 
a  Legacy  of  the  late  Rev.  and  famous  Dr.  Daniel  IVilliams  of 
London,  for  the  Support  oi  two  Mijfionaries  to  the  Heathen,  were 
pleafed,  while  he  was  in  Bo/ion y  to  confult  him  about  a  Miflion 
to  thofe  Indiam  called  the  Six  Nations,  particularly  about  the 
Qualifications  requifite  in  a  Millionary  to  thofe  Indians ;  and 
were  io  fatisfied  with  his  Sentiments  on  this  Head,  and  had 
that  Confidence  in  his  Faithfulnefs  and  his  Judgment  and  Dif- 
cretion  in  Things  of  this  Nature,  that  they  defired  him  to  under- 
take to  find  and  recommend  a  couple  of  Perfons  fit  to  be  employed 
in  this  Bufinefs  ;  and  very  much  left  the  Matter  with  him. 

Likev^rfe  certain  pious  and  generouflv  difpofed  Gentlemen  In 
Bo/ion,  being  moved  by  the  wonderful  Narrative  of  his  Labours 
and  Succefs  among  the  Indians,  in  New-Jerfey,  and  more  efpeci- 
ally  by  their  Converfation  with  him  on  the  fame  Subjeft,  took 
Opportunity  to  enquire  more  particularly  into  the  State  and 
Necefiities  of  his  Congregation,  and  the  School  among  the  7«- 
dians,  with  a  charitable  Intention  of  contributing  fomething  of 
their  Subftance  to  promote  the  excellent  Defign  of  the  Advance- 
ment of  the  Interefts  of  Chriftianity  among  the  Indians  ;  and 
iinderftanding  thst  there  was  a  want  of  Bibles  for  theSchool, three 
Dozen  of  Bibles  were  immediately  procured,  and  14^.  in  Bills 
(  of  the  old  Tenour  )  given  over  and  above,  befides  more  large 
j3eaefa(!^ions  made  afterwards,  which  1  fliall  have  Occafion  to 
fneniion  in  their  proper  Place. 


*  I  have  had  Advantage  for  the  more  full  Information  of  his 
Condu6>.  and  Converfation,  the  Entertainment  he  met  with, 
and  what  pafs'd  relating  to  him  while  in  Bojlcn  ;  as  he  was 
conflantly  attended,  during  his  Continuance  there,  by  one 
•f  my   Children,  in  oidcr  to  his  AfTiftancc  in  his  Illncfs. 

Mr. 


i/ Mr.  David  Braincrd.     A.D.  1747.     231 

Mr.  Brainerd's  Reftoration  from  his  extreamly  low  State  in 
So/ion^  fo  as  to  go  abroad  again  and  to  travel,  was  very  .unex- 
pected to  him  and  his  Friends.  My  Daughter  who  was  wili'^^him, 

writes  thus  concerning  him,in  a  Letter  datedya«^  23.  «'- 

<^  OnThurrday,he  was  very  ill  with  a  violentFevcr,  &  extreme 
"  Pain  in  his  Head  and  Breaftjand,  at  Turns,  delirious.  So  he 
«<  remained  'till  SaturdayEvening,when  hefeemM  to  be  in  the 
<«  Agonies  of  Death  :  The  Family  was  up  with  him  *tillone 
««  or  two  o'clock,  expecting  every  Hour  would  be  his  laft.  On 
<«  Sabbath  Day  he  was  a  little  revived,  his  Head  was  better, 
<«  but  very  full  of  Paift,and  exceeding  fore  at  his  Breaft,  much 
<«  put  to  it  for  Breath  &c.  Yefterday  he  was  better  upon  all 
««  Accounts.  Laft  Night  he  ilept  but  little.  This  Morning 
<«  he  is  much  worfe.— —  Do^otFynchon  faySjhe  has  noHopes 
*«  of  his  Life  ;  nor  docs  be  think  it  likely  he  will  ever  come 
<«  out  of  the  Chamber  ;  tho'  he  fays,  he  may  be  able  to  come 
««  to  Northampton.^—' — 

In  another  Letter  dated  June  29.  She  fays  as  follows.  <«  Mr» 
<«  Brainetd  has  not  fo  much  Pain  nor  Fever,  fince  I  laft  wrote, 
««  as  before  :  Yet  he  is  extreamly  weak  and  low,  and  very 
«  faint,  expecting  every  Day  will  be  his  laft.  He  fays,  'tis  im' 
<«  pofflble  for  him  to  live^  for  warn  of  Life.  He  has  hardly  Vi- 
<«  gour  enough  to  draw  his  Breath.  I  went  this  Morning  into 
«*  Town,  and  when  I  came  Home,  Mr.  Browfield  faid,  he 
««  never  expedled  I  (houldfeehim  alive  ;  for  he  lay  twoHours, 
««  as- they  thought,  dying  ;  One  could  fcarcely  tell,  whether 
«'  he  was  alive,  or  not ;  he  was  not  able  to  fpeak,  for  fome 
*«  Time:  But  now  is  much  as  he  was  before.  The  DoSlor 
*«  thinks,  he  will  drop  away  in  fuch  a  Turn.  Mr.  Brainerd 
<«  fays,  he  never  felt  any  Thing  fo  much  like  Diffolution,  as 
««  what  he  felt  to  Day  ;  and  faySjhe  never  had  any  Conception 
«'  of  its  being  poflible  for  any  Creature  to  be  alive,  and  yet  fo 

<«  weak  as  he  is  from  Day  to  Day — Dodlor  Pyruhon  fays, 

««  he  (hould  not  be  furprized,  if  he  (hould  fo  recover  as  to  live 
«'  half  a  Year  ;  nor  would  it  furprize  him,  ii  hefhould  die  in 
<«  half  a  Day.  Since  I  began  to  write,  he  is  not  fo  well ;  hav- 
'<  ing  had  a  faint  Turn  again  :  Yet  patient  and  refigned,  hav- 
«'  ing  no  diftrefiing  Fears,  but  the  contrary.'' 

His  Phyfician,  the  honourable  Jofepl  Pynchon  Efq;  when  he 
vifited  him  in  his  extream  lllnefsin  Boflon^  attributed  his  fink- 
ing fo  fuddenly  Mnto  a  State  fo  extreamly  low,  and  nigh  unto 
Death,  to  the  breaking  of  Ulcers,  that  had  been  long  gathering 
in  his  Lungs  (as  Mr,  Brainerd  himfelf  intimates  in  a  foremcn- 

H  h  tion'^ 


232    ^t.zo.  sriifLIFE 

tion'd  Paffege  in  his  Diary)  and  there  difcharging  and  dlffufing 
their  £.prulent  Matter ;  which,  while  Nature  was  labouring 
and  fl.uggling  to  throw  ofF  (that  could  be  done  no  otherwife, 
than  by  a  gradual  ftrainingof  it  thro*  the  fmall  Veflels  of  thofc 
vital  Parts )  This  occafion'd  an  high  Fever,  and  violentCough- 
ing,  and  threw  the  whole  Frame  of  Nature  into  the  utmoft 
Diforder,  and  brought  it  near  to  a  Diflblution.  But  fuppofed, 
if  the  Sftength  of  Nature  held  'till  the  Lungs  had  this  Way  gra« 
dually  cleared  themfclves  of  this  putid  Matter,  he  might  revive^ 
and  continue  better,  'till  new  Ulcers  gathered  and  broke  j  but 
then  would  furely  fmk  again  ;  and  that  4here  was  no  Hope  of 
his  Recovery  ;  but  (  as  he  exprelTed  himfclf  to  one  of  my  Neigh- 
bours, who  at  that  Time  faw  him  in  £  oft  on)  he  was  as  certainly 
a  dead  Man,  as  if  he  was  (hot  through  the  Heart. 

But  fo  it  was  ordered  in  divine  Providence,  that  the  Strength 
of  Nature  held  out  through  this  great  Confli£t,  fo  as  juft  to 
cfcape  the  Grave  at  that  Turn  ;  and  then  he  revived,  to  the 
Aftonifhment  of  all  that  knew  his  Cafe. 

After  he  began  to  revive,  he  was  vifited  by  his  youngeft  Bro- 
ther, Mr.  JJrael  Bramrd,  a  Student  at  Tale- College  ;  who  hav- 
ing heard  of  his  extreme  lllnefs,  went  from  thence  to  Sofion^ 
in  order  to  fee  him,  if  he  might  find  him  alive,  which  he  but 
little  expected. 

This  Vifit  was  attended  with  a  mixture  of  Joy  and  Sorrow  to 
Mr.  Brainerd*  He  greatly  rejoyced  to  fee  his  Brother,  efpecially 
bccaufe  he  had  defired  an  Opportunity  of  fome  religiousConver- 
fation  with  him  before  he  died.  But  this  meeting  was  attended 
with  Sorrow,  as  hisBrother  ^♦rought  tohim  the  forrowfulTidings 
of  his  Sifter  Spencer' sDc^ih  at  Haddam ;  a  Sifter,between  whom 
and  him  had  long  fubfifted  a  peculiarly  dear  AfFe(Slion,and  much 
Intimacy  in  fpiritual  Matters,  and  whofe  Houfe  he  ufed  to  make 
his  Home,  when  he  went  to  Haddam^  his  native  Place.  He 
had  heard  nothing  of  her  Sicknefs  'till  this  Report  of  herDeath. 
But  he  had  thefe  Comforts,  together  with  the  Tidings,  viz,  a 
Confidence  of  her  being  gone  to  Heaven,  and  an  Expedation  of 
his  foon  meeting  her  there. —  His  Brother  continued  with  him 
'till  he  left  the  Town,  and  came  with  him  from  thence  to 
JNorthampton. 

Concerning  the  laft  Sabbath  Mr.  Broinerd  {pent  in  Boflon^  he 
writes  in  his  Diary  as  follows.] 

Lord's-Day,  July  ig.  I  was  juft  able  to  attend  publickWcr- 
fliip,  being  carried  to  the  Houfe  of  God  in  a  Chaife.  Heard 
Or,  Sen,':ill  pre;ich,  in  the  Forenoon  ;  Partook  of  the  Lord's- 

Supper 


[  i?/iVfr.  David  Brainerd.     A,D.  1747.     2^:^ 

Supper  at  this  Time.  In  this  Sacrament,  1  faw  aftonifhing  di- 
vine Wifdom  difplay'd  ;  fuch  Wifdom  as  I  faw  required  the 
Tongues  of  Angels  and  glorified  Saints  to  celebrats  :  It  feemM 
to  me,  I  never  (hould  do  any  Thing  at  adoring  the  infinite  Wif- 
dom of  God  difcovered  in  theContrivance  of  Man's  Redemption, 
until  I  arrived  at  a  World  of  Pcrfeflion  ;  yet  I  could  not  help 
ftriving  to  call  upon  my  Soul  and  all  within  me  to  blcfs  the  Name  of 
God.'  >  •  ■  In  the  Aftcrnoonjheard  Mr.  Prince  preach.--- 1  faw 
more  of  God  in  the  Wifdom  difcovered  in  the  Plan  of  Man** 
Redemption,  than!  faw  of  any  other  of  his  Peifedlions, through 
the  whole  Day. 

[  He  left  Bo^on  the  nextDay.  But  before  he  came  away,  he 
had  Occafion  to  bear  a  very  full  plain  and  openTe/iimon^  againft 
that  Opinion,  that  the  EJfence  of  faving  Faith  lies  in  believing 
thatCbriJi  died  for  me  in  particular  ^Tind  that  this  is  the  fr/i  A£t  of 
Faith  in  a  true  Believer's  clofing  v/ith  Chrift.  He  did  it  in  a 
long  Conference  he  had  with  a  Gentleman,  that  has  very  pub- 
lickly  and  flrenuoufly  appeared  to  defend  that  Tenet.  He  had 
this  Difcourfe  with  him  in  the  Prefence  of  a  Number  of  confi- 
derable  Perfons,  who  came  to  vifit  Mr.  Brainerd  before  he  left 
the  Town,  and  to  take  their  Leave  of  him.  In  which  Debate, 
he  made  this  plain  Declaration  (at  the  fame  Time  confirming 
what  he  faid,  by  many  Arguments)  That  the  EJfence o{  faving 
Faith  was  wholly  left  out  of  that  Definition  of  faving  Faith 
which  that  Gentleman  has  publifhed  ;  and  that  the  Faith  which 
he  had  defined,  had  nothing  of  God  in  it,  nothing  above  Na- 
ture, nor  indeed  above  the  Power  of  the  Devils  ;  and  that  all 
fuch  as  had  thit  Faith,  and  had  no  better,  tho*  they  might  have 
this  to  never  fo  high  a  Degree,  would  furely  perifh.  And  he 
declar'd  alfo,  that  he  never  had  greater  AJfurame  of  the  Falfe- 
nefs  of  the  Principles  of  thofe  that  maintained /^^t-^  ^  Faith, and 
of  their  dangerous  and  deflrudive  Tendency,  or  a  more  affecl- 
ing  Senfe  of  the  great  Delufion  and  Mifery  of  thofe  that  de- 
pended on  getting  to  Heaven  hy  fuch  a  Faith  (while  they  had  no 
better)ihzn  he  lately  had  when  he  was  fuppofed  to  be  at  thePoint 

to^/V,and  expedled  everyMinutetopafsinto£/^r«/0'. M^* 

i5r<i;W^*s  Difcourfe  at  this  Time,and  the  forceablcReafonings, 
by  which  he  confirmed  what  he  aflerted,  appeared  to  be  greatly 
to  the  Satisfaftion  of  thofe  prefent ;  as  feveral  of  them  tookOc- 
cafion  cxprcfly  to  manifeft  to  him,  before  they  took  Le^ve  of 
him. 

H  h  2  Whcfi 


254    -^^-  3^*  Wtf  LIFE 

When  this  Converfation  was  ended,  havinp'  bid  an  affeflio- 
natc  Farewel  to  his  Friends,  he  fet  out  in  the  Cool  of  the  Af- 
ternoon, on  his  Journey  toNorthampton^  attended  by  hisBrother, 
and  my  Daughter  that  went  with  him  to  B  often  ;  and  would 
have  been  accompanied  out  of  the  Town  by  a  Number  ofGen- 
tlemen,  befides  that  honourable  Perfon  who  gave  him  his  Com- 
pany for  feme  Miles  on  that  Occafion,  as  a  Teftimony  of  their 
Efteem  and  Refped^had  not  his  Averfton  to  any  Thing  of  Pomp 
and  Shew  prevented  it.  ] 

Saturday,  "July  25.  1  arrived  here  at  Northampton  ;  having 
fet  out  from  Bojlon  on  Monday,  about  4  o'Ciock  P.  M.  In  this 
Journey,  I  rode  about  16  Miles  a  Day,  one  Day  with  another. 
was  fometimes  extremely  tired  and  faint  on  the  Road,  fo  that 
it  feem'd  impolTible  for  me  to  proceed  any  further  :  At  other 
Times  I  was  confiderably  better,  and  felt  fomc  Freedom  both 
of  Body  and  Mind. 

Lord's- Day,  July  26.  This  Day,  I  faw  clearly,  that  I  fhould 
rcver  be  happy  ;  yea,  that  God  himfelf  could  not  make  me  hap- 
py, unlefs  1  could  be  in  a  Capacity  to  pleafe  and  glorify  him  for 
evtr  :  Take  away  thii^  and  admit  me  into  all  the  fine  Heavens 
that  can  be  conceived  of  by  Men  or  Angels,  and  1  (hould  ftill 
be  fr.iferable  forrver. 

[  Tho'  he  had  fo  far  revived,  as  to  be  able  to  travel  thus 
far,  yethe  manifefted  no  Expectation  of  Recovery:  He  fup- 
pofed,  as  his  Phylician  did,  that  his  being  brought  fo  near  to 
Death  at  Bcjlon^  was  owing  to  the  breaking  of  Ulcers  in  his 
Lungs  :  He  told  me,  that  he  had  had  feveral  fuch  ill  Turns  be- 
fore, only  not  to  fo  high  a  Degree,  but  as  he  fuppofed,  owing 
to  the  fame  Caufe,  i;i;s.  the  breaking  of  Ulcers;  and  that  he 
was  brought  lower  and  lower  every  Time  ;  and  it  appeared 
to  him,  that  in  his  laft  Sicknefs  (in  Bojlon)  lie  was  brought  as 
low  as  it  was  po^ible  and  yet  live  ;  and  that  he  had  not  the 
leaftExpe(Slation  of  furviving  the  nexlReturn  of  this  breaking  of 
Ulcers:  But  ffiM  appeared  perfedlly  calm  io  theProfpeft  ofDcath. 

On  Wednefday-Morning,  theVVeek  after  he  came  ioNortb- 
{imptony  he  took  Leave  of  his  Brother  Ifrael^  as  never  expelling 
to  fee  him  again  in  this  World  ;  he  now  fetling  out  from  hence 
on  his  Journey  to  New- idavtn. 

When  Mr.  ^r^j/W-;/ came  hither,  he  had  fo  much  Strength 
as  to  be  able,  from  Day  to  Dav,  to  ride  out  two  or  threeMiles, 
ppd  to  return  ;  and  fometimes  to  pray  in  theFamily ;  but  from 
this  l^ime  he  gradually,  but  fenfibly,  decayed,  U.  became  weak- 
er and  weaker. 

Whilg 


(?/  Mr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1747.      255 

While  he  was  here,  his  Converfation  from  firft  to  laft  was 
much  on  the  fame  Subje<Sls  as  it  had  been  when  in  Bofton  :  He 
was  much  in  fpcakingof  the  Nature  of  true  Religion  of  Heart 
and  Pradice,  as  diftinguifhcd  from  it'*  various  Counterfeits  ; 
cxpreffinghis  great  Concern,  that  the  latter  did  fo  much  prevail 
in  many  Places.  He  often  manifefted  his  great  Abhorrence  of 
all  fuch  DoSfrines  and  Principles  in  Religion,  as  in  any  wife  fa- 
voured of,  and  had  any  (  tho'  but  a  remote  )  Tendency  to  An- 
ttnomianifm  ;  of  all  fuch  Notions,  as  feem*d  to  diminifti  theNe- 
ceflity  of  Holincfsof  Life,or  toabateMen's  Regard  to  thcCom- 
mandsof  Godj,and  a  ftrift  diligent  and  univerfal  PracSlice  of 
Vertue  and  Piety,  under  a  Pretence  of  deprecating  ourWorks, 
and  magnifying  God's  free  Grace.  He  fpake  often,  with  much 
Deteftation,  of  fuch  Experiences  and  pretended  Difcoveries  and 
Joys,  as  have  nothing  of  the  Nature  oi  SanSiification  in  thAs 
and  don't  tend  toStridnefs,  Tendcrnefs,  and  Diligence  inReli- 
gion,  and  Meeknefs  and  Benevolence  towards  Mankind,  and 
an  Humble  Behaviour :  And  he  alfo  declared,  that  he  looked  on 
fuch  pretended  Humility  as  worthy  of  no  Regard,  that  was  not 
manifefted  by  Modejiy  of  ConduSf  and  Converfation,  He  fpake 
often,  with  Abhorrence,  of  the  Spirit  and  Pradice  that  appears 
among  the  greater  Part  of  Separatijis  at  this  Day  in  the  Land, 
particularly,  thofe  in  the  eaftern  Farts  of  ConneSficut ;  in  their 
condemning  andfeparating  fromthe7?<?»^/;7^Miniftry  &Churches, 
their  crying  down  Learning  &  a  Learned  Miniftry,  theirNotion 
of  an  immediate  Call  to  the  Work  of  theMiniftry,and  theForward- 
nefs  o(  Lay- men  to  fet  up  themfelves  as  publick  Teachers*  He 
had  been  much  converfant  in  the  Eaftern  Part  of  ConneSficut(h\s 
native  Place  being  near  to  it)  when  the  fame  Principles,  Noti- 
on and  Spirit  began  to  operate,  which  have  fince  prevailed  to  a 
greater  Height  ;  and  had  Acquaintance  with  feme  of  thofe  Per- 
fons  who  are  become  Heads  and  Leaders  of  the  Separati/is  ;•  he 
had  alfo  been  converfant  withPerfons  of  the  fame  Way  elfewhere: 
And  [heard  him  fay,  once  and  again,  he  knew  by  his  Acquain- 
tance with  this  Sort  of  People,  that  what  was  chiefly  and  moffc 
generally  inRepute  among  them  as  Xh^Power  ofGodlinefs^'TfdkS  an 
intirely  different  Thing  from  that  true  vital  Piety  recommended 
in  the  Scriptures ,  and  had  nothing  in  it  of  that  Nature.  He  ma- 
nifefted a  greatDiflike  of  a  Difpofition  in  Perfons  to  much  Noife 
and  Show  in  Religion, and  afFe£ling  £0  be  abundant  in  proclaim- 
ing and  publifhing  their  o^n  Experiences:  Tho*  at  the  fame 
Time  he  did  not  condemn,  but  approved  of  Chriftians  fpeak- 
of  their  own  Experiences  on  fome  Occafions^^nd  to  fome  Per- 


fons,  with  due  Modefty  andDifcretion.  He  himfelf  ^omtXimcs^ 
while  at  my  Houfe,  fpake  of  his  own  Experiences  :  But  it  was 
always  with  apparent  Rejerve^  and  in  the  Exercife  of  Care  and 
Judgment  with  RefpefttoOccafionSjPerfons,  and  Circumftan- 
ces.  He  mentioned  fome  remarkable  Things  of  his  own  religi- 
ous Experience  to  two  young  Gentlemen,  Candidates  for  the 
Miniftry,  who  watched  with  him  (  each  at  a  different  Time  ) 
when  he  was  very  low  and  not  far  from  his  End  ;  But  he  defired 
both  of  them  not  to  fpeak  of  what  he  had  told  them  'till  afur 
his  Death. 

The  Things  which  were  the  Subjeft  of  that  Debate  I  men- 
tioned before,  th»t  he  had  with  a  certain  Gentleman,  the  Day 
he  left  BoftoHy  feem'd  to  lie  with  much  Weight  on  his  Mind 
after  he  came  hither  ;  and  he  began  to  write  a  Letter  to  that 
Gentleman  ;  expreffing  his  Sentiments  concerning  the  dange- 
rous Tendency  of  fome  of  the  Tenets  he  had  expreflcd  in  Con- 
verfation,  and  in  the  Writings  he  had  publifhed  ;  with  theCon^ 
fiderations  by  which  the  exceeding  hurtful  Nature  ofthofe  No- 
tions is  evident ;  but  he  had  not  Strength  to  iinifh  his  Letter. 

After  he  came  hither,  as  long  as  he  lived,  he  was  much  in 
fpeaking  of  that  future  Profperity  of  Z;ff«,  that  is  io  often  fore- 
told and  promifcd  in  the  Scripture  :  It  was  a  Theme  he  delight- 
ed to  dwell  upon ;  and  his  Mind  feem'd  to  be  carried  forth 
ttrith  earneft  Concern  about  it,  and  intenfe  Defires,  that  Reli- 
gion might  fpeedily  and  abundantly  revive  and  flourifh  ;  tho*  he 
had  not  the  leaft  Expedlation  of  Recovery  ;  yea,  the  nearer 
Death  advanced,  and  the  more  the  Symptoms  of  it's  Approach 
incrcafed,  flill  the  more  did  hisMind  feem  to  be  taken  up  with 
this  Subject.  He  told  me,  when  near  his  End,  that  "  he  ne- 
*«  ver  in  all  his  Life  had  his  Mind  fo  led  forth  in  Defires  and 
*'  earneft  Prayers  for  the  flourifhing  of  Christ's  Kingdom  on 
**  Earth,  as  fince  he  was  brought  {o  exceeding  low  at  BoftonJ** 
He  feem'd  much  to  wonder,  that  there  appear'd  no  more  of  a 
Difpofition  in  Minifters  and  People  to  pray  for  the  flourifhing 
of  Religion  thro'  the  World  ;  that  fo  little  a  Part  of  theirPr^^- 
^rjwas  generally  taken  up  about  it,  in  their  Families,  and  elfe- 
where  ;  and  particularly,  he  fevcral  Times  exprefled  his  Won- 
der, that  there  appear'd  no  more  Forwardness  to  comply  With 
the  Propojal  lately  made,  in  a  Memorial  from  a  Number  ofMi- 
nifters  in  Scotland,  and  fent  over  Into  America,  for  united  extraor^ 
dinary  Prayer^  among  Chrift's  Minifters  and  People,  for  the 
iming  of  Chriji'i  Kingdom  :  And  he  fent  it  as  his  dying  Advice 

19 


^ '^  e/ Mr.  David  Brainerd.       A.D.1747.    237 

to  his  own  Congregation,  that  they  (hould  pra^life  agreably  to 
that  Propofal.  f 

Tho'  he  was  conftantly  exceeding  weak,  yet  there  appeared 
in  him  a  continual  Care  well  to  improve  TirW,and  fill  it  up  with 
fomething  that  might  be  profitablejand  in  fome  Refpe6l  for  the 
Glory  of  God  or  the  Good  of  Men  ;  either  profitable  Conver- 
fation,or  writing  Letters  to  abfent  Friends,  or  noting  fomething 
in  his  Diary,  or  looking  over  his  former  Writings,  corredting 
them,  and  preparing  them  to  be  left  in  the  Hands  of  others  at 
his  Death,  or  giving  fome  Directions  concerning  a  future  Con< 
dudling  and  Management  of  his  People,  or  Employment  in 
fecret  Devotions.  He  feem'd  never  to  be  eafy,  however  111,  if 
he  was  not  doing  fomething  for  God,  or  in  his  Service. 

After  he  came  hither,  he  wrote  a  Preface  to  a  Diary  of  the 
famous  Mr.  Shepard*s  ( in  thofej  Papers  before-mention'd, lately 
found  )  having  been  much  urged  to  it  by  thofe  Gentlemen  ia 
Bojion  who  had  the  Care  of  the  Publication  :  Which  Diary, 
with  his  Preface^  has  fmce  been  publiflied.  % 

In  his  Diary  for  LordVDay,  Augu/i  9.  He  fpeaks  of  longing 
Defires  after  Death^  thro'  a  Senfe  of  the  Excellency  of  a  State 
of  PerfeSfioHr 

In  his  Diary  for  Lord*s-Day  Aug,  16.  He  fpeaks  of  his 
having  fo  much  Refreftiment  of  Soul  in  the  Houfe  of  God,  that 
it  feem'd  alfo  to  refrcfh  his  Body,  And  this  is  not  only  noted 
in  his  Diary,but  was  very  obfervable  to  others  ;  it  was  very  ap- 
parent, not  only,  that  his  Mind  w^s  exhilcrated  with  inward 
Confolation,  but  alfo  that  his  animal  Spirits  and  bodily  Strength 
feemed  to  be  remarkably  reftored,  as   tho'  he  had  forgot  his 

lllnefs But  this  was  the  laft  Time  that  ever  he  attended 

publick  Worfhip  on  the  Sabbath. 


t  His  Congregarion,fmce  this,have  with  great  Chearfulnefs 
and  Unanimity  fallen  in  with  this  Advice,  and  have  pra6tt- 
fed  agreably  to  the  Propofal  from  Scotland;  and  have  at 
Times,  appeared  with  uncommon  Engagednefs  and  Fer- 
vency of  Spirit  in  their  Meetings  and  united  Devotions, 
purfuant  to  that  Propofal  :  Alfo  the  Prefbyteries  of  N^w- 
Torky  and  New-Brunfwick^  fince  this,  have  with  one  Con- 
fent,  fallen  in  with  the  Propofal,  as  likewife  fome  others  of 
God's  People  in  thofe  Parts. 

X  A  Part  of  this  Preface  is  infer  ted  in  the  Appendix  to  this 
Hiftory. 

On 


238     JE"/.  3^-  fri^LIFE 

OnTuefday-Morning  that  Week  ( I  being  abfcnt  on  a  Jour- 
ney )  he  prayed  with  my  Family  ;  but  not  without  much 
Difficulty,  for  want  of  bodily  Strength  :  And  this  was  the  lafl 
Family-Prayer  that  ever  he  made. 

He  had  been  wont,  'till  now,  frequently  to  ride  out,  two  or 
three  Miles ;  But  this  Week,  on  Thurfday,  was  the  laftTime 
he  ever  did  fo.] 

Lord's-Day,  Aug.  23.  This  Morning,  I  was  confiderably 
refrefliM  with  the  Thought,  yea,  the  Hope  and  Expedtation  of 
the  Enlargement  o{  Christ's  Kingdom  ;  and  I  could  not  but 
hope,  the  Time  was  at  Hand, when5a^y/<7«  the  great  would /j//, 
and  rtje  no  more  :  This  led  me  to  fome  fpiritual  Meditations, 
that  were  very  refrefhihg  to  me.  I  was  unable  to  attend  pub- 
lick  Worfhip,  either  Part  of  the  Day  5  but  God  was  pleafad  to 
afford  me  Fixednefs  and  Satisfaction  in  divine  Thoughts.  No- 
thing fo  refrefhes  my  Soul,  as  when  I  can  go  to  God,  yea,  to 
God  my  exceeding  Joy,  When  he  is  fo,  fenfibly,  to  my  Soul,  Oh, 
how  unfpeakably  delightful  is  this  ! 

In  the  Week  paft,  1  had  divers  Turns  of  inward  Refrefhing  ; 
tho' my  Body  was  inexpreffibly  weak,  followed  continually 
with  Agues  and  Fevers.  Sometimes  my  Soul  centered  in  God, 
as  my  on\y Portion  ;  and  I  felt  thatlftiould  be  forever  unhappy, 
if  he  did  not  reign  :  I  faw  the  Sweetnefs  andHappinefs  of  being 
his  Subject,  at  his  Difpofal  :  This  made  all  my  Difficulties 
quickly  vanifli. 

From  thisLord's-DayjV/z.  Aug.i'^A  was  troubled  very  much 
with  vapoury  Diforders,  and  could  neither  write  nor  read,  and 
could  fcarcely  live  ;  altho*  through  Mercy,  was  not  fo  much 
©pprefsM  with  heavy  Melancholy  and  Gloominefs,  as  at  many 
other  Times. 

[  'Till  this  Week  he  had  been  wont  to  lodge  in  a  Room 
above  Stairs;  but  he  now  grew  fo  weak,  that  he  was  no  longer 
able  to  go  up  Stairs  and  down  ;  Friday  Aug.  28.  was  the  laft 
Time  he  ever  went  above  Stairs,  henceforward  he  betook  him- 
felftoa  lower  Room. 

On  Wcdnefday,  September  a.  Being  the  Day  of  our  publick 
J.eaure,he  feem'd  to  be  refrefli'd  with  feeing  theNeighbouring 
Miniftersthat  came  hither  to  the  Le6ture,and  exprcfs'd  a  great 
Dtfire  once  more  to  go  to  theHoufe  of  God  on  thatDay  :  And 
accordingly  rode  to  the  Meeting,  and  attended  divine  Service, 
.while  iheRev.  Mr.  JVoodbridgeoi  Hatfield ^xz^^\i'd.  He  fignified 

that 


p/ M*.  DavIdBraiflcrdI  A.D.1747.'  239 

that  he  fuppofed  it  to  he  the  laft  Time  that  ever  he  fhould  at- 
tend the  publick  Worfliip  ;  as  it  proved.  And  indeed  it  was 
the  laft  Time  that  ever  he  went  out  at  our  Gate  ahvc. 

On  the  Saturday-Evening  next  following,  he  was  unexpc£l- 
cdly  vifited  by  his  Brother  Mr.  John  Braimrd^  who  came  to  fee 
him  from  New-Jerfey»  He  was  much  refreftied  by  this  unex- 
pe(Sled  Vifi(,this  Brother  being  peculiarly  dear  to  him  ;  and  he 
feem*d  torejoycc  in  a  devout  and  folemn  Manner,  to  fee  him, 
and  to  hear  the  comfortable  Tidipgs  he  brought  concerning  the 
State  of  his  dear  Congregation  of  Chriftian  Indians :  And  aCir- 
cumftance  of  this  Vifit,  that  he  was  exceeding  glad  of, was,  that 
his  Brother  brought  him  fomeof  his  private  Writings  {xovnNew- 
f/erfey^  and  particularly  his  Diary  that  he  had  kept  for  many 
Years  paft.  ] 

LordVDay,  Sept.  6.  I  began  to  read  feme  of  my  private 
Writings,  which  my  Brother  brought  me  ;  and  was  confidera- 
bly  refrefh'd,  with  what  I  met  with  in  them. 

Monday,  Sept»  7.  I  proceeded  farther  in  reading  my  old  pri- 
vate Writings,  and  found  they  had  the  fame  EfFe£t  upon  me  as 
before  :  I  could  not  but  rejoyce  and  blefs  God  tor  what  pafTed 
lon^ago,  which  without  Writing  had  been  entirely  loft. 

This  Evening,  when  I  was  in  great  Diftrefs  of  Body,  jnySoul 
long'd  that  God  (hould  be  glorified  :  1  fav/  there  was  no  Hea- 
ven but  this.  I  could  not  but  fpeak  to  the  By-ftandcrs  then  of 
the  only  Happimfs^  viz.  Pleafing  God.  Oh  that  I  could  foyr 
ever  live  to  God !  TheDay,  I  truft,is  at  Hand, the  perfe6lDay : 
Oh,  the  Day  of  Deliverance  from  ail  Sin  ! 

Lord*s-Day,  Sept.  13.  I  was  much  refrefhM  and  engaged  iit 
Meditation  and  Writing,  and  found  a  Heart  to  aft  for  God. 
My  Spirits  were  refrelhed,  and  my  Soul  delighted  to  do  fome- 
thing  for  God. 

[On  the  Evening  following  that  Lord's- Day,'his  Feet  began 
to  appear  fenfibly  fweli*d  ;  whicli  thenceforward  fwell'd  more 
and  more.     A  Symptom  of  his  DifTolution  coming  on. 

The  next  Day,  his  Brother  John  left  him,  being  obliged  t« 
return  to  'New-Jcrfeyon  fome  Bufincfs  of  great  Importance  and 
Neceflity  ;  intending  to  return  again  with  all  pofTible  Speedy 
hoping  to  fee  his  Brother  yet  once  more  in  the  Land  of  ihflf 
Living. 

Mr.  Brainerd  having  now  with  much  Deliberaticn  confidcr- 
cd  of  the  important  Affair  fore-mentioned, left  with  him  by  the 

I  i  feenoaraW* 


240      Ml.  30:  3^^  L  I  F  E 

honourable  Commiflioners  In  Boflon^  of  theCorporatfon  inZoa* 
don  for  the  Propagation  of  the  Gofpel  in  New- England  and 
Parts  adjacent,  viz.  the  fixing  upon  and  recommending  two 
Pcrfur/S  proper  to  be  improved  as  MilTionariea  to  the  Six  Na- 
/wn;,  he  about  this  Time  wrote  a  Letter,  recommending  two 
young  Gentlemen  of  his  Acquaintance  to  ti ';"-(Jommiffioncrs, 
viz.  Mr.  Elibu  Spencer  oi  Ea/i-Haddam,  and  Mr.  Job  Strong 
of  Northampton.  The  Commiilioners  on  the  Receipt  of  thisLet- 
ter,  cheerfully  and  unanimouily  agreed  to  accept  of  and  employ 
thePerfons  he  had  recommended  :  Who  accordingly  have  fmce 
waited  on  the  CommiiTioners  to  receive  their  Inftrudions  5  and 
purfuant  to  their  Inftrucflions,  have  applied  themfelves  to  a  Pre- 
paration for  the  Bufinefs  of  their  Miflion,  in  the  Manner  to 
which  they  dire(5led  them  ;  and  one  of  them,  viz.  Mr.  Spencer, 
has  been  folernnly  ordained  to  that  Work,  by  feveral  of  theMi- 
niftersof  Bofion^  in^he  Prefence  of  an  Eccleliaftical  Council 
convened  for  thatPurpofe  ;  and  is  now  gone  forth  to  the  Nation 
cf  the  Oncidaes^   about  170  Miles  beyond  Albany, 

He  alfo  this  Week,  viz.  on  Wednefday,  Septemb.  16.  wrote 
a  Letter  to  a  particular  Gentleman  in  B 0/^ on  {  one  of  thofc 
charitable  Perfons  foremention'd,  who  appeared  To  forward  to 
contribute  of  t'^eir  Subllance  for  the  promoting  Chriftianity  a- 
moBg  the  Indian:  )  relating  to  the  Growth  of  the  IndianSchoo]^ 
and  the  Netd  of  another  School- Mafter  or  fome  Perfonto  afiift 
the  School-Maffer  in  inftrudting  the  Indian  Children.  Thefe 
Gentlemen,  on  the  Receipt  of  this  Letter,  had  a  Meetingjand 
agreed  with  greatChearfulnefs  to  give  200  Pounds  (  in  Bills,  of 
the  old  Tenor )  for  the  Support  of  another  School-Mafter  ;  and 
defired  the  Rev.  Mr.  Pemberton  o(  New-Tor^  (  who  was  then 
at  Bofton^  and  was  alfo,  at  their  Defire,  prefent  at  their  Meet- 
ing j  as  foon  as  pofiible  to  procure  a  fuitablc  Perfon  for  thatSer- 
vice  ;  and  alfo  agreed  to  allow  75  Pounds  to  defray  fome  fpe- 
cial  Charges,  that  were  requifite  to  encourage  the  Miflion  to 
the  Six  Nation's  (befide?  the  Salary  allowed  by  the  Commiflio- 
ners )  which  was  alfo  done  on  fome  Intimations  given  by  Mr. 
Bro  inerd. 

Mr.  Brainerd  fyent  himfelf  much  in  writing  thofe  Letter?, 
being  exceeding  weak  :  But  it  feem*d  to  be  much  to  his  Satis- 
faction, that  he  had  been  enabled  to  do  it  ;  hoping  that  it  was 
r.;mething  done  for  God,  and  which  might  be  for  the  advance- 
ment of  Christ's  Kingdom  and  Glory.  In  writing  the  laft 
of  thefe  Lettei^s,  he  was  obli^Tcd  to  ufe  the  Hand  of  another, 
noi  being  able  to  write  himfelf. 

On 


tf/ikfr.  David  Brainerd.      A.  D.   1747.'     241 

On  theThurfday  of  this  Week  [Septemh.  17.  )  was  thelaft 
Time  that  ever  he  went  out  of  his  Lodging  Room.  That 
Day,  he  was  again vifited  by  his  Brother  Ifmel,  who  continued 
with  him  thence-forward  'till  his  DearJi.  O  ;  that  Evening,  he 
was  taken  withfomething  of  a  Diarrhea  ;  which  heJook'd  up- 
on as  another  Sign  of  his  approaching  Death  :  Whereupon  he 
exprefs'd  himfeif  thus ;  Oh,  the  glorioui  Time  is  now  coming  !  I 
have  lov.ged  to  ferve  Godperfe£ily  :  Now  Gcd  will  gratify  thofe 
Deftres  !  And  fromTime  toTime,  at  the  feverai  Steps  and  new 
Symptoms  of  the  fenfible  Approach  of  his  Difiblution,  he  was 
fo  far  from  being  funk  or  damped,  that  he  feem'd  to  be  animat- 
ed, and  made  morechearful ;  as  being  glad  at  the  Appearances 
of  Death's  Approach.  He  often  ufed  theEpithet,  glorious,  when 
fpeaking  ofthe  Day  of  his  Death,  c^W'ing  it  that  glorious  Day, 
And  as  he  faw  his  DifTolution  gradually  approaching,  he  was 
much  in  talking  about  it,  with  perfect  Calmnefs  fpeaking  of 
a  future  State  ;  and  alfo  fettling  all  hisAffairs,  very  particularly 
and  minutely  giving  Directions  concerning  what  he  would 
have  done  in  one  Refpedt  and  another  afier  he  was  dead.  And 
the  nearer  Death  approachedjthe  more  defirous  he  feem'd  to  be 
of  it  He  feveral  Times  fpake  of  the  different  Kinds  of  fP'ii- 
lingnefs  iodic  ;  and  fpoke  of  it  as  an  ignoble,meanKind  of  Wil- 
iingnefs  to  die,  to  be  willing  to  leave  the  Body,  only  to  get  rid 
of  Pain  ;  or  to  go  to  Heaven,  only  to  get  Honour  and  Advance- 
ment there.] 

Saturday,  ^^/>/.  19.  near  Night,  while  I  attempted  to  walk 
a  little, my  Tho'ts  turned  thus  ;  How  infinitely  J weet  it  is,to  Icvs 
God,  and  be  all  for  him  !  Upon  which  it  was  fuggcf^ed  to  me, 
Tou  are  not  an  Jngel,mi  lively  and  a^ive.  To  which  my  whole 
Soul  immediately  replied,  I  asfimerely  defire  to  love  and  glorify 
God,as  any  Angel  in  Heaven.  Upon  which  it  was  fuggefted  again. 
But  you  are  filthy, not  fit  for  Heaven.  Hereupon  inftantly  appear'd 
the  blefled  Robes  of  Christ's  i^/^^/.-^w/K^V^', which  1  could  not 
but  exult  and  triumph  in  ;  and  1  viewM  the  infifsiieExceilency 
of  God,  and  my  Soul  even  broke  with  Longings,  that  God 
{hoMht  glorified,  I  thought  of  Dignity  in  Heaven  ;  but  m- 
ftantly  theTho't  returned,  1  don't  goto  Heaven  to  get  Honour , 
hut  to  ^ive  all  poj/ihle  Glory  and  Ptaife,  Oh,  how  I  longed, that 
God  (hould  be  glorified  on  Earth  alfo  I  Oh,  I  was  made,  for 
Eternity,  if  God  might  be  glorified  !  Bodily  Pains  I  cared  not 
for ;  Tho'  I  was  then  in  Extremity,  I  never  felt  eafier  5  I  felt 
willing  to  glorify  GoTi  in  that  State  of  bodily  Diftrefs,  as  long  as 
he  pleafed  i  Ihould  continue  in  it.    The  Gravf  appeared  reahy 

I  i  3  (wczt^ 


242     v^/.  30.  ^be  LIFE  ' 

fwect,  and  I  longed  to  lodge  my  weary  Bones  in  it  :  But  Oh 
that  God  might  be  glorified  !  this  was  the  Burden  of  all  myCry. 
Oh,  1  knew,  1  (hould  be  ailive  as  an  Angel,  in  Heaven  ;  and 
that  I  fhould  be  ftrip*d  of  my  Jilt hyG arm ents  !  So  that  there  wa» 

no  Objedlion. But  Oh,  to  love  Sind  praife  God  more,  to 

plea/e  him  for  ever  !  This  my  Soul  panted  after,  and  even  now 
pants  for  while  1  write.  Oh,  that  God  might  be  glorified  in  the 
whole  Earth.  Lord,  let  thy  Kingdom  come.  I  longed  for  a  Spi- 
lit  of  Preaching  to  defcend  and  reft  on iIf/»//?tfrj, that  they  might 
addrefs  the  Confciences  of  Men  with  Clofenefs  and  Power.  I 
law,  God  had  the  refidue  of  the  Spirit ;  and  my  Soul  longed  it 
fhould  h^ poured  from  on, high,  1  could  not  but  plead  with  God 
/or  my  dear  Congregation,  that  he  would  preferve  it,  and  not 
fufFer  his  great  Name  to  lofe  it's  Glory  in  that  Work  i  MySoul 
ftill  longing,  that  G^^  might  be  glorified. 

[  The  extraordinary  Frame,  that  he  was  in,  that  Evening^ 
could  not  be  hid  ;  his  Mouth  fpake  out  of  the  Abundance  of  hit 
Hearty  eXprefTing  in  a  very  afFedling  Manner  much  the  fame 
Things  as  are  written  in  his  Diary :  And  among  very  many 
other  extraordinary  Expreflions,  which  he  then  uttered,  were 
fuch  a§  thefe  ;  "  A/y  Heaven  is  to  pkafe  God,  and  gUrify  him^ 
*«  and  give  all  to  him,  and  to  be  wholl}'  devoted  to  his  Glory  ; 
**  that  is  the  Heaven  I  long  for  ;  that  is  my  Religion,  and 
*^  that  is  my  Happinefs  ;  and  alvyays  was  ever  fmce  1  fuppoCe 
*«  1  had  any  true  Religion  ;  and  all  thofe  that  are  of  that  Re- 

*'  ligion,  fhall  meet  me  in  Heaven. ^ ■  1  don't  go  to  Heaven 

*'  to  be  advanced, but  to  give  Honour  toGod.  'Tis  noMatter 
*'  where  I  Ihall  be  fiation*d  in  Heaven,  whether  I  have  a  high 
*'  or  a  low  Seat  there  ;  but  to  love  and  pleafe  and  glorify  God 
*'  is  all  :  Had  1  a  Thoufar.d  Sculs,  if  ihey  were  worth  any 
*«  Thing,  I  would  give  'em  all  to  God  ;  but  I  have  nothing 

•'   to  give,  when  all  is  done. h  is  impofTible  for  any  rational 

*'  Creature  to  be  happy  without  adding  z\\  for  God :  God  him- 

<*   felf  could  not  make  him  happy  any  other  Way.- 1  long 

*'    to  be  in  Heaven,   praiftng  and  glorifying  God  with  the  holy 

*<  Angels  :  All  my  Dchre  is  to  glorify  God. My  Heart 

*^  goe.  out  to  the  '£ur)ing  Place  ;  it  r«em8  to  me  a  drjirahlt 
*'   i^lace  :   but  Oh  io  glorify  God  ;  that  is  it  ;    that  is  above 

"  all. 'Tis  a  great  Comfort  to  me,  to  think,  that  I  have 

•'  done  a  little/<;r  God  in  the  World  ;  Oh  !  'tis  bat  a  very 
*'  Jrnall  Matter  ;  yet  I  have  done  a  little  ;  and  I  lament  it, 
•^  that  1  have  not  doxie  more  for  him.;_     ■__  There  is  nothing 

**  ia 


of  Mr,  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1747.     245 

«  in  the  World  worth  living  for,  but  doing  Good^  and  fimflnng 
<<  God*^  Work,  doing  the  Work  that  Chriji  did.  I  fee  nothing 
*'  elfc  in  the  World,   that  can  yield   any  SatisfacStion,  befidc't 

'^  living  to  God,  pleafeng  him,  and  doing  his  whole  Will. • 

''  My  greateft  Joy  and  Comfort  has  heen^  to  do  fomething  for 
*'  promoting  tlielntereft  of  Religion, and  theSouls  or  particular 
•='  Perfons  :  And  now,  in  my  Illnefs,  while  I  am  full  of  Pain 
**  and  Diftrefs,  from  Day  to  Day,  all  the  Comfort  I  have,  is 
''  in  being  able  to  do  fome  little  Chare  [  or  fmall  Piece  of 
"  Work  ]  for  God  ;  either  by  fomething  that  I  fay,  or  by 
*'  writing,  or  fome  other  Way." 

He  intermingled  with  thefe  and  other  like  Expreffions,many 
pathetical  Counjels  to  thofc  that  were  about  him  i  particularly 
to  my  Children  and  Servants.  He  applied  himfelf  to  fome  of 
my  younger  Children  at  this  Time  ;  calling  them  to  him,  and 
fpeaking  to  'em  one  by  one  ;  fetting  before  them,  in  a  very 
plain  Manner,  the  Nature  and  Eflence  of  true  Piety,  and  its 
great  Importance  and  Neceffity  ;  earneftly  warning  them  not 
to  reft  in  any  Thing  fhort  of  that  true  and  thorough  Change  of 
Heart,  and  a  Life  devoted  toGod  ;  counfelling  them  not  to  be 
flack  in  the  great  Bufinefs  of  Religion, nor  in  the  leaft  to  delay 
it  ;  enforcing  his  Counfels  with  this,  that  his  Words  were  the 
Words  of  a  dying  Man  :  Said  he,  "I  (hall  die  here, and  here  J 
*'  {hall  be  buried,  and  here  you  will  fee  my  Grave, and  do  you 
**  remember  what  I  have  faid  to  you. I  am  going  intcEternity : 
'«  And 'tis  fweet  to  me  to  think  of  Eternity;  the  Endlefnefs 
''  of  it  makes  it  fweet:  But  Oh,  what  fhall  I  fay  to  the  Etcr- 
*'  nity  of  the  ^F/Vi<?i/  I  can't  mention  it,nor  think  of  it :  The 
''  Thought  is  too  dreadful.  When  you  fee  my  Grave,  then 
**  remember  v.'hat  I  faid  to  you  while  I  was  alive  :  then  think 
'*  with  your  felf,  how  thatMan,  that  lies  in  that  Grsve,  coun- 
^^  felPd  and  warned  me  to  prepare  for  Death." 

His  Body  feen>ed  to  be  marvelloufly  f^rengthen'd,  through 
the  inward  Vigour  andRefrelhment  of  hisMind  ;  fo  that,  altho' 
before  he  was  fo  weak  that  he  could  hardly  utter  a  S{?ntence, 
yet  now  he  continued  his  moft  afFe£ting  and  profitableDifcourfe 
to  us  for  more  than  an  Hour,  with  fcarce  any  Intermiffion  j 
and  faid  of  it,  when  he  had  done,  //  luas  the  lo[i  Sermon  that 
ever  he  Jhoutd  preach. 

This  extraordinary  Frame  of  Mind  continued  thenextDay  j 
of  which  he  fays  in  his  Diary  as  follows. J 

Lord's- Day  Sept,  20.  W^as  ftill  in  a  fweet  and  comfortable 
Frame  i  and  was  again  ndted  with  Defires  that  God  might 

be 


244    ^/.  30.  T^^  LIFE 

be  glorified^zvd  with  Longings  to  love  and  live  to  him.  Longed 
for  the  Influences  of  the  divine  Spirit  to  defcend  onMini/ien^  in 
a  rpecial  Manner.  And  Oh,  I  longed  to  be  with  God,  to  be- 
held  his  Glory,  and  to  bow  in  his  Prefence  ! 

[  It  appears  by  what  is  noted  in  his  Diary,  both  of  thisDay, 
and  the  Evening  preceeding,  that  his  Mind  at  this  Time  was 
much  imprefs'd  with  a  Senfe  of  the  Importance  of  the  Work  of 
the  Minijiry, znd  the  Need  of  the  Grace  of  God,  and  his  fpecial 
fpiritual  AiTiftance  in  this  Work  :  And  it  alfo  appeared  in  what 
he  exprefei  in  Converfation  ;  particularly  in  his  Difcourfe  to 
his  Brother  J/rat/,  who  was  then  a  Member  of  Tale- College  at 
^ew- Haven,  and  had  been  profecuting  his  Studies  and  acade- 
mical Excrcifes  there,  to  that  End,  that  he  might  be  fitted  for 
the  Work  of  the  Miniftry,  and  was  now  with  him.*  He  now, 
and  from  Time  to  Time,  in  this  his  dying  State, recommended 
to  his  Brother,  a  Life  of  Self-denial,  of  Weanednefs  from  the 
World,  and  Dcvotednefs  to  God,  and  an  earncft  Endeavour  to 
obtain  much  of  the  Grace  of  God's  Spirit,  and  God's  gracious 
Influences  on  his  Heart  ;  reprefenting  the  great  Need  which 
JVlinifters  ftand  in  of  them,  and  the  unfpeakable  Benefit  of 
them  from  his  own  Experience.  Among  many  other  Expref- 
fions,  hefaid  thus  ;  "  When  Minifiers  feel  thefe  fpeci;.!  gra- 
<«  cicus  Influences  on  their  Hearts,  it  wonderfully  afSfts  them 
««  to  come  at  the  Confciences  of  Men, and  as  it  were  to  handle 
«  them  wi^hHands  ;  whereas,  without  themjWhateverReafon 
«'  and  Oratory  we  make  ufe  of, we  do  but  make  ufe  of  Stumps^ 
««  inftead  of  Hands."] 

Monday,  Sept.  2r.  I  began  to  corre£l  a  little  Volume  of 
my  private  Writings:  God,  I  believe,  remarkably  helped  me 
in  it  ;  my  Strength  was  furprizingly  lengthened  out,  and  my 
Thoughts  quick  and  lively,  and  my  Soul  refrefli'd,  hoping  it 
might  be  a  Work  far  God.  Ob,  how  good,  how  fweet  it  is, 
to  labour  for  God  ! 


«t 


This  young  Gentleman  was  an  ingeniou?,ferious,ftu3lous 
and  hopefully  truly  pious  Perfon  :  There  appeared  in  him 
many  Qiialilies  giving  Hope  of  his  being  a  great  Blefling 
in  his  Day.  But  it  has  pieafed  God,  fince  the  Death  of 
his  Brother,  to  take  him  away  alfo.  He  died  that  Winter, 
at  New-Haven^  on  Jan.  6.  1747,8.  of  a  nervous  Fever, 
after  about  a  Fortnight's  Illnefs, 

Tuefday, 


of  Mr.  David  Bralnerd,      A.D.  1 747,     245 

Tuefday,  ^ept,  22.  Was  again  employed  in  reading  and 
correding,  and  had  the  fame  Succefs,  as  the  Day  before.  I  was 
exceeding  weak ;  but  it  feem'd  to  icfrelh  my  Sou),  thus  to 
fpend  Time. 

VVednefday,  Sep*  23.  I  finifh'd  my  Corredtions  of  the  little 
Piece  foremcntion'd,and  felt  uncommonly  peaceful  :  It  feem'd 
as  if  I  had  now  done  all  my  Work  in  this  World, and  ftood  ready 
for  my  Call  to  a  better.  As  long  as  I  fee  any  Thing  to  be  done 
for  God,  Life  is  worth  having  :  But  Oh,how  vain  and  unwor- 
thy 'tis,  to  live  for  any  lower  End  !  — ; — ^-This  Day,  I  indited 
a  Letter,  I  think,  of  great  Importance,  to  the  Rev.  Mr.  Byram 
in  New-Jerfey  :  Oh  that  God  would  blefs  and  fucceed  thatLet- 
ter, which  was  written  for  theBeneiit  of  hisChurch  I  *  Oh  that 
God  would  puri/y  the  Sons  of  Levi,  that  his  Glory  may  be  ad- 
vanced ! This  Night,  I  endured  a  dreadful  Turn,  wherein 

my  Life  was  expefled  fcarce  an  Hour  or  Minute  together.  But 
blefTed  be  God,  I  have  enjoyed  confiderable  Sweetnefs  in  divine 
Things,  this  Week,  both  by  Night  and  Day. 

Thurfday,  Sept,  24.  My  Strength  began  to  fail  exceedingly  ; 
which  look'd  further  as  if  I  had  done  all  my  Work  :  However 
I  had  Strength  to  fold  and  fuperfcribe  my  Letter.  Auout  two 
I  went  to  Bed,  being  weak  and  much  difordered,  and  lay  in  a 
burning  Fever  'till  Night,  without  any  proper  Reft,  in  the 
Evening,  I  got  up, having  lain  down  in  fome  of  myCloatbs  ;  but 
was  in  the  greateft  Diftrefs,  that  ever  I  endured,  having  an  un- 
common Kind  of  Hiccough  ;  which  either  ftrangled  me,  or 
threw  me  into  a  Straining  to  vcmit ;  and  at  the  fame  Time  was 
diftrefs'd  with  griping  Pains.  Oh, the  Diftrefj  of  thisEvening  1 
I  had  little  Expe(^atiDn  of  my  living  the  Night  through,  nor 
indeed  had  any  about  me:  and  1  longed  for  the  fint/hins;  Mo- 
ment ! I  was  obliged   to  repair  to*Bcd  by  6  o'Clock  ; 

and   thro'  Mercy  enjoyed  fome  Reft;   but  was  grievoufly  dif- 

trefs'J  at  Turns  v/ith  the  Hiccough.— .  My  Soul  breath'd 

after  God,  while  the  Watcher  was  with  mt :-— When /hall 
I  come  to  God^  even  to  God^  my  exceeding  Joy  f  Ob  for  kis  bifjfed 
Likenefs  I 

Friday,  Sept.  25.  This  Day,  I  was  unfpeakably  weak,  and 
liitle  better  than  Speechlefs  all  the  D^y  :  However,  I  was  able 

*  It  was  concerning  theQ^ialifications  of  Alir.l/iers,  and  the 
Examination  and  L'ceniing  o'  Can.Jidaies  for  the  Work  of 
the  Minidry. 

to 


246      ^/.  3o:  77^(?LIFE 

to  write  a  little,  and  felt  comfortably  in  fome  Part  of  tbe  Dayc 
Oh,  it  refrefhedmy  Soul,  to  think  of  former  Things,  ofDefires 
to  g\oT\iy  God,  of  the  Pleafures  of  living  to  him  !  Oh  my  dear 
Cod,  I  am  fpeedily  coming  to  thee^  1  hope  !  Haften  the  Day^  OLord^ 
if  it  be  thy  bleJf/dWill :  Ohcome^Lord  "J efus,  come  quickly.  Amen.  * 

Saturday,  Sept,  26.  I  felt  the  Sweetnefs  of  divine  Things, 
this  Forenoon ;  and  had  the  Confolation  of  a  Confcioufnefs  that 
I  was  doing  fomething  for  God. 

Lord's- Day,  Sept.  27.  This  was  a  very  comfortable  Day 
to  my  Soul  ;  I  think,  1  awoke  with  God*  I  was  enabled  to  lift 
vpmy  Soul  to  God,  early  this  Morning  ;  and  while  I  had  little 
bodily  Strength,  I  found  Freedom  to  lift  up  my  Heart  to  God 
for  my  feif  and  others.  Afterwards,  Was  pleafcd  with  theThoughts 
of  fpeedily  entring  into  the  unfecn  World. 

[  Early  this  Morning,  as  one  of  the  Family  came  into  the 
Room,  he  exprefs'd  himfelf  thus  :  I  have  had  more  Pleafurc  this 
Morning,   thsnallthe  Drunkards  in  the  Worli  enjoy ^  if  it  were 

all  extras ed  ! ■  So  much  did  he  efteem  the  Joy  of  Faith 

above  the  Pleafures  of  Sin. 

He  fejf,  that  Morning,  an  unufual  Appetite  to  Food  ;  with 
which  his  Mind  feem'd  to  be  exhilarated^  as  looking  on  it  aSign 
of  the  very  near  Approach  of  Death  ;  and  faid  upon  it,  /  was 
born  on  a  Sabbath-Day  ;  and  1  have  Reafon  to  think  ]  was  new- 
born on  fiSabbath-Day  ;  ^  1  hope  IJJjalldie  on  this  Sabbath-Day  : 
J  fljould  look  upon  it  as  a  Favour^  if  it  may  be  the  Will  of  God  that 
it  (hould  hefo  :  I  long  for  the  Time.  Oh,  why  is  his  Chariot  fo 
long  in  coming  ?  Why  tarry  theWheels  of  his  Chariots  ?  1  am 
very  willing  to  part  with  all  :  1  am  willing  to  part  with  my  dear 
brother  John,  and  never  to  fee  him  again,  to  go  to  be  forever  with 
the]  Lord,  f  Qh,  when  ]  go  there,  how  will  God's  dear  Church  on 
Earth  he  upon   my  Mind  I 


This  was  the  laft  that  ever  he  wrote  In  his  Diary  with  hh 
own  Hand  :  Tho'  it  is  continued  a  little  farther,  in  a  bro- 
ken Manner  ;  written  by  his  Brother  Jfrael,  but  indited 
by  his  Mouth  in  this  his  weak  and  dying  State. 
He  had,  before  this,  exprefsM  a  Defire,  if  it  might  be  the 
Will  of  God,  to  live  'till  his  Brother  returned  from  Kew- 
Jerfey  :  \Vho,v;hen  he  went  away, intended, if  pOiTible,to 
perform  his  Journey  and  return  in  a  Fortnight  ;  hoping 
once  more  to  meet  his  Brother  in  the  Land  of  the  Living. 
The  Fortnight  was  no '.v  near  expired,  it  ending  the  next 
Day.  Afterwardj 


of  Mr.  David  Brainerd.       A.D.  1 747.    247 

Afterwards,  the  fame  Morning,  being  afked,  how  he  did,  he 
anfwercd,  /  am  almojl  in  Eteftiity  :  I  long  to  be  there.  MylVor^ 
is  done:  1  have  done  with  all  my  Friends  :  All  the  World  ts  nothing 
to  me.  I  long  to  be  in  Heaven,  praifmg  and  glorifying  God 
with  the  holy  Angels  :  All  my  Deftre  is  to  glorify  God. 

During  the  whole  of  thefe  laft  two  Weeks  of  his  Life,  he 
feem'd  to  Continue  in  this  Frame  of  Heart,  locfe  from  all  the 
World,  as  having  done  his  Work,  and  done  with  all  Things 
here  below,  having  nothing  to  do  but  to  die,  and  abiding  in  an 
earned  Defire  and  Expeftation  of  the  happy  Moment,  when 
his  SoulOiouId  take  it's  Flight,  and  go  to  a  State  of  Perfeaion 
of  Holinefs  and  perfed  glorifying  and  enjoying  God,  manifeftcd 
in  a  variety  ofExprefTions.  He  faid.  That  the  Confideratton  of  the 
Day  of  Death,  and  the  Day  of  Judgment,  had  a  long  Time  been 
peculiarly  fweet  to  him.  He  from  Time  to  Time  fpake  of  his 
being  willing  to  leave  the  Body  and  the  World  immediately,  that 
Day,  that  Night,  and  that  Moment,  if  it  was  the  Will  ofGod. 
He  a'lfo  was  much  in  exprefTing  his  Longings  that  the  Church 
of  Chrifl  on  Earth  might  flouriih,  and  Chrift's  Kingdom  here 
miiih.  be  advanced,  notwiihftanding  he  was  about  to  leave  the 
Earth,  and  (hould  not  with  his  Eyes  behold  the  defirableEvent^ 
nor  be'inftrumental  in  promoting  it.  He  faid  to  me,oneMorn- 
ing  as  I  came  into  the  Room,  My  Thoughts  have  been  employed 
en  the  old  dear  Theme,  The  Profperity  of  God's  Church  on  Earth. 
Js  I  waked  out  of  Sleep,  I  was  led  to  cry  for  the  pouring  out  of 
God's  Spirit,  and  the  Advancement  of  Chrift's  Kingdom,  which 
the  ear  Redeemer  did  and  fuffered  fo  much  for.  'lis  that  efpeci-^ 
ally  makes  me  long  for  it.—  He  exprefled  much  Hope  that  a  glo- 
rious Advancement  of  Chrift's  Kingdom  was  near  at  Hand. 

He  once  told  me,  that  he  had  formerly  longed  for  the  Out- 
touring  of  the  Spirit  of  God,  and  the  glorious  Times  of  the  Churchy 
and  hoped  they  were  coming  ;  andjhould  have  been  willing  to  have 
lived  to  promote  Religion  attbatTime,  if  that  had  been  the  Will  of 
God  ;  But  ( fays  he  )  lam  zvilling  it  /hould  be  as  //  n  5  ^  would 
not  have  the  Choice  to  mahe  for  my  felf,  for  ten  Thoufand  Worlds. 
He  cxprefTed  on  his  Death- Bed  a  full  Perfwafion,  that  he  (hould 
in  Heaven  fee  the  Profperity  of  the  Church  on  Earth,  snd 
Ihould  rejoyce  with  Chrift  therein  ;  And  the  Confiderat-on  of 
it  feem'd  to  be  highly  pleafing  and  fatisfying  to  his  M'"^- 

He  alfo  ftill  dwelt  much  on  the  grcatlmportance  of  the  WorJc 
of  iW/wY/^foftheGofpel;  and  cxprefsM  his  Longings,  that 
they  might  hefiWdwith  the  Spirit  of  God;  and  manifcfted  much 
I)cfirctofceloin«of  the  Neighbouring  Mimfters,  whpjn  he 


24S     Mt,  30;  T^^  LIFE 

had  fomeAcquaintan.ee  wlth^  and  whofe  fincere  Frienddiip  he 
wasjConficlenc  of,  that  he  might  converfe  freely  with  ihcm  on 
that  Subjc<£t,  before  he  died.  And  it  fo  happened,  that  he  had 
Opportunity  with  fome  of  them,  according  to  his  Defire. 

Another  Thing  that  lay  much  on  hisHeart,  and  that  he  fpake 
of,  from  Time  to  Time,  ia  thefe  near  Approaches  of  Death, 
was  the  fpiritual  Profperity  of  his  own  Congregation  ofChriftiaa 
Indians  in  New  J  erf ey  :  and  when  he  fpake  of  them, it  was  with 
peculiar  Tcndernefs  ;  fo  that  his  Speech  would  be  prefently 
interrupted  and  drowned  with  Tears. 

He  alfo  exprefled  much  Satisfadtion  in  the  Difpofals  of  PrO" 
vidence,  with  Regard  to  the  Circumftanaes  of  his  Death  ;  par- 
ticularly that  God  had  before  his  Death  given  him  the  Oppor- 
tunity he  had  had  in  Bojsn^  with  fo  many  confiderablePerfons, 
Minifters  and  others,  to  give  in  his  Te/iimony  for  God,  and 
againft  falfe  Religion,  and  many  Miftakes  that  lead  to  it,  and 
promote  it  ;  and  there  to  lay  before  pious  and  charitable  Gen- 
tlemen, the  State  of  thejndians,  and  theirNeceiTities,  to  fo  good 
Effect;  and  that  God  had  fmce  given  him  Opportunity  to 
write  to  them  further  concerning  thefe  Affairs  ;  and  to  write 
other  Letters  of  Importance,  that  he  hoped  might  be  of  good 
Influence  with  Regard  to  the^tate  of  Religion  among  the  Indi^ 
ansy  and  elfewhere,  after  his  Death.  Heexprefs'd  greatThank- 
fulnefs  to  God  for  his  Mercy  in  thefe  Things.  He  alfo  men- 
tioned it  as  what  he  accounted  a  merciful  Circumftance  of  his 
Death,  that  he  fhould  die  here  \\  .  And  fpeaking  of  thefe 
Things, he  hi^yGod  had  granted  him  allhiiDeJire  y  and  fignified, 
that  now  he  could  with  the  greater  Alacrity  leave  theWorld,] 


II  The  Editor  takes  Leave  to  make  the  Remark,  (hat  when 
Mr.  Brainerd  was  at  Sojlon^  fick  nigh  unto  Death, 
it  was  with  Relu6lance  he  thought  of  dying  in  a  Place 
where  Funerals  are  often  attended  with  a  Pomp  &  ShcWy 
which  (  efpecially  on  Occafion  of  his  own  )  he  was  very 
averfe  to  any  Appearance  of  :  And  tho*  it  was  with  fome 
Difficulty  he  got  his  Mind  reconciled  to  the  Profpedt  then 
before  h  m,  yet  at  laft  he  was  bro'C  to  acquiefce  in  the 
Divine  Will,  with  Refpe«Sl  to  this  Circumftance  of  his 
D-jpartiire.  However,  it  pleafed  God  to  order  iheEvent 
fo  as  to  gratify  his  Defire^  which  he  ha  J  exprefs'd,  of 
getting  back  to  Northampton.vf'xxh  a  View  particularly  to 
a  more  liknt  and  private  BuriaU 

Monday, 


ef  Mr.  David  Braincrd.     A.D.  1747;      249 

Monday,  Sept.  28.  I  was  able  to  read,  and  make  fome  few 
Cor  i -^rt'  rsiainy  private  Writings  ;  buc  fourd  1  could  not 
Wf.  -..  ,  i^ddone;  I  found  my  felf  fenfibly  declined  in  all 
Rc-.'ci-'.  I;  has  been  only  from  a  little  while  before  Noon, 
'tir  about  one  or  twoo*Clock,  that  I  have  been  able  to  do  any 
Th.;;  j;,  for  lome  Time  part  :  Yet  this  refrefli'd  my  Heart,  that 
I  C(iu'  i  do  any  Thing,  either  publick  or  private,  that  I  hoped 
was  .or  God. 

[  This  Evening,  he  was  fuppos'd  to  be  dyin^^  :  He  tho't  (o 
Wmfelf,  and  was  tho*t  (o  by  thofe  who  were  about  him.  He 
feem'd  glad  at  the  Appeaiance  of  the  near  Approach  of  Death. 
He  was  almoft  Speechlefs,  but  his  Lips  appeared  to  move  ;  and 
one  that  fat  very  near  him, heard  him  utter  fuch  Expieflions  as 

thefe,  C§me,    Lord  Jefus^   come  quickly Oh,  why  is  his 

Chariot  fo  long  ifi  coming  f  — — -  After  he  revived,  he  blamed 
himfelf  for  having  been  too  eager  to  be  gone.  And  in  expreffiog 
what  he  found  in  the  Frame  of  his  Mind  at  that  Time,  he  faid, 
he  then  found  an  inexpreffibly  fweetLove  to  thofe  that  he  lojk- 
ed  upon  as  belonging  to  Chriji,  beyond  almoft  all  that  ever  he 
felt  before  5  fo  that  it  feem'd  (  to  ufe  his  own  Words  )  like 
a  little  Piece  of  Heaven  to  have  one  of  ihem  near  him.  And  being 
afked,  whether  he  heard  the  Prayer  that  was  (  at  his  Defire  ) 
made  with  him  ;  he  faid,  Tes^  he  heard  every  U'ord^  and  had  an 
uncommon  Senje  of  the  Things  that  were  uttered  in  that  Prayer ^and 
that  every  Word  reached  his  Heart, 

On  the  Evening  of  the  next  Day,  viz.  Tuefday,  Septemb.ig, 
As  he  lay  in    his  Bed,  he   feem'd    to  be  in  an  extraordinary 
Frame  j  his  Mind  greatly  engaged   in  fvveet  Meditations  con- 
cerning the  Profperity  of  Zim  :  There  being  prefent  here   at 
that  Time  two  young  Gentlemen   of  his  Acquaintance,  that 
were  Candidates  for  the  Minillry^  he  defired   us  all  to  unite  in 
fmging  a  Pfalm  on  that  Subjedt,  even  Xion's  Profperity.     And 
on  his  Defire  we  fung  a  Part  of  the  CII  Pfalm,     This  feem'd 
much  to  refrefti  and  revive  him,  and  gave  him  new  Strength  ; 
fo  that,   tho'  before  he  could  fcarcely  fpeak  at  all,  nov/  he  pro- 
ceeded, with  fome  Freedom  of  Speech,  to  give  his  dying  Coun- 
fcls^  to  thofe  two  young  Gentlemen  fore-mentioned,  relating  to 
their  Preparation  for,   and  Profecution  of   that  great  Work  of 
theMiniftry  they  were  defigned  for  ;  and  in  particular,  earneftly 
recommended  to  'em  frequent  fccret  Fajiing  and  Prayer  :  And 
enforced  his  Counfel  with  Regard  to  this,  from  his  own  Experi- 
ence of  the  great  Comfort  and  Ben^t  of  it  ;  which  (  faid  he  )   I 
ihould  not  mention,  were  it  not  that  I  am  a  dying  Perfon.  And 

K  k  2  after 


i^o    JEl  30:  ^he  LIFE 

after  he  had  finiflied  his  Counfel,  he  made  a  Prayer,  in  the  Au- 
dience of  us  all  ;  wherein,  befides  praying  for  this  Family,  for 
his  Brethren,  and  thofe  Candidates  for  the  Miniftry,  and  for 
his  own  Congregation,  he  earneftly  prayed  for  the  reviving  and 
flouriftiing  of  Religion  in  the  World. 

'Till  now,  he  had  every  Day  fat  up  Part  of  the  Day  i  but 
after  this,  he  never  rofc  from  his  Bed.  ] 

Wcdnefday,  Sept,  30.  I  was  obliged  to  keep  my  Bed  the 
whole  Day, thro' Weakncfs.  However, redeemed  a  littleTimc, 
and  with  the  HeJp  of  my  Brother,  read  and  corie£ted  about  a 
Dozen  Pages  in  my  M.S. giving  an  Account  of  my  Conveifion. 

Thurfday,  O£iob.  i.  I  endeavoured  again  to  do  fomething  by 
Way  of  writing,  but  foon  found  my  Powers  of  Body  and  Mind 
utterly  fail.  Felt  not  fo  fweetly,  as  when  I  was  able  to  do 
fomething  that  I  hoped  would  do  fome  Good.  Jn  the  Evening, 
was  difcompofed  and  wholly  delirious  ;  but  it  was  not  long  be- 
fore  God  was  pleafed  to  give  me  fomeSlcep,  and  fully  compofed 
my  Mind.  +  Oh,  blefled  be  God  for  his  great  Goodnefs  tome, 
iince  I  was  fo  low  at  Mr.  Bromfitld'%^  on  Thurfday  Junt  18  laft 
paft.  He  has,  except  thofe  few  Minutes,  given  me  the  clear 
Exercife  of  myReafon,  and  enabled  me  to  labour  much  for  him, 
in  Things  both  of  a  publick  and  private  Nature  ;  and  perhaps 
to  do  more  Good,  than  I  fhould  have  done  if  1  had  been  well  ; 
befides  the  comfortable  Influences  of  his  blefled  Spirit,  with 
which  he  has  been  pleafed  to  refrefh  my  Soul.  May  his  Name 
have  all  the  Glory  for  ever  and  ever.  Amen. 

Friday,  Qmh,  2.  My  Soul  was  this  Day,  at  Turns,  fweetly 
feton  God  :  I  longed  to  be  with  hinii  that  I  might  behold  his 
Glory  \  I  felt  fweetly  difpofed  to  commit  all  to  him,  even  my 
deareft  Fiicnds,  my  deartft  Fleck,  and  my  abfent  Brother,  and 
all  my  Concerns  for  Time  and  Eternity.  Oh  that  hisKingdom 
might  come  in  the  World  j  that  ihey  might  all  love  and  glorify 
him,  for  what  he  is  in  himfcif  ;  and  that  the  blefTed  Redeemer 
might /^/  of  the  Travail  of  his  Soul^  and  be  fatisfied.  Oh,  come, 
fjordjefus^  come  quickly,  Amtn.  * 


From  this  Time  forward,  he  had  the  free  Ufc  of  his  Rea- 
fon  'till  the  Day  before  hisDeaih  ;  exceptmg  that  at  fomc 
times  he  appeared  a  little  hit  for  a  Moment,at  £rft  waking 
out  of  Sleep. 

Here  ends  his  Diary  :  Thefe  are  the  laft  fVordsy  that  are 
written  in  it,  either  by  his  owfl  Hand,  or  by  any  othct 
from  his  Mouih.         '  f  Ths 


t?/ Mr.  David  Bralnerd.     A.D.  1747,     251 

[  The  next  Evening,  we  very  much  expedled  his  Brother 
John  from  Nav-Jerfei  ;  it  being  about  a  Week  after  thcTime 
that  he  propofed  for  his  Return, vi^hen  he  went  away.  And  tho' 
our  Expedations  were  ftill  difappointed  ;  yet  Mr.  Brainerd 
fcem'd  to  continue  unmoved,  in  the  fame  calm  and  peaceful 
Frame,  that  he  had  before  manifefted  ;  as  having  refigned  all  to 
God,  and  having  done  with  his  Friends,  and  writh  all  Things 
here  below. 

On  the  Morning  of  the  next  Dav,being  LordVDay,  Oa,  4. 
as  nay  Daughter  Jerufha  (  who  chiefly  tended  him  )  came  into 
the  Room,  he  look'd  on  her  very  pleafantly,  and  ('u\.  Dear  Je- 
rufha, are  you  willing  to  part  with  me  P /  am  quite  willing 

to  part  with  you  :  I  am  willing  to  part  with  all  my  Friends  :  I 
am  luilling  to  part  with  my  dear  Brother  Jnhn  ;  altbo'  /  love  him 
the  befl  of  any  Creature  living  :  I  have  committed  him  and  all  my 
Friendi  to  God, and  can  leave  them  with  God.  Th<i\  if  I  thought 
1  Jhauld  not  fee  you^and  be  happy  with  you  in  another  Wo*-ldy  I  could 
not  bear  to  part  with  you.  But  we  /hall  fpendan  happy  Eternity 
togethtr  !   *  In  the  Evening,as  one  came  into  the  Room  with  a 

Bible 


*  Since  this,  it  has  pleafed  a  holy  and  fovereign  God  to  take 
away  this  my  dear  Child  by  Death,  on  the  14  of  February^ 
next  following  ;  after  a  (hort  Illnefs  of  five  Days  ;  in  the 
eighteenth  Year  of  her  Age.  She  was  a  Pcrfon  of  much 
the  fame  Spirit  with  Mr.  Brainerd,  She  had"  conftantly 
taken  Care  of,and  tended  him  in  hisSicknefs,for  19 Weeks 
before  hisDeath  ;  devoting  herfelf  to  it  with  greatDelighr, 
becaufe  fhe  Iook*d  on  him  as  an  eminent  Servant  of  Je- 
fas  Chrift.  In  thisTime,  he  had  much  Converfation  with 
her  on  Things  of  Religion  ;  and  \n  his  dying  State,  often 
exprefs'd  ta  uSjherP^rents,  his  greatSatisfa6lion  concerning 
her  true  Piety,  and  his  Confidence  that  he  fhould  mset 
her  in  Heaven  ;  and  his  high  Opinion  of  her,  not  only  as 
a  true  Chriflian,  but  a  very  eminent  Saint  ;  One  whofe 
Soul  was  uncommonly  fed  and  cntertain-d  with  Things 
that  appertain  to  the  moft  fpiritual  experimental  and  dif- 
tinguifhingParts  of  Religion  i  and  one  who  by  theTemper 
of  her  Mind  was  fitted  to  deny  herfelf  for  God, and  to  do 
Good,  beyond  any  young  Woman  whatfoever  that  he 
knew  of.  She  had  manifefted  a  Heart  uncommonly  de- 
t-Qted  to  Qodj  in  the  Courfc  of  her  Life,  many  Years  be- 


^52     /Et,  10.  r^^LIFE 

Bible  in  herHand,he  expreCs'd  himfelf  thus ;  Oh, thai  dearBotrk  ! 
that  lovely  Book  !  J  Jhall  foon  fee  it  opened  !  The  Adyfteriei  that 
are  in  it,  and  the  Myjieries  of  God's  Providenciy  will  be  all  un- 
folded ! 

His  Diftemper  now  very  apparently  prey*d  on  hisVitals  in  an 
extraordinary  Manner  :  Not  by  a  fudden  breaking  oi  Ulcers  in  his 
Lungs, asat5<7/?<?», but  by  a  cojiftantDifchargeofpurulentMatter, 
jngreatQuantiiies  :  So  that  what  he  bro*t  up  by  Expe^oration, 
leem'd  to  be  as  it  were  MouthfuJs  of  almoft  clear  Pus  ;  which 
was  attended  with  very  great  inward  Pain  and  Diftrefs. 

On  Thurfday,  O^oh.  6.  He  lay,  for  a  confiderable  Time, as 
if  he  were  dying.  At  which  Time,  he  was  heard  to  utter,  in 
broken  Whifpers,  fuch  Expreflions  as  thefe  ;  He  will  come,  he 
will  net  tarry. —  J  Jhall  foon  be  in  Glory, —  1  /hall  foon  glorify  God 
with  the  Jngels. But  after  fome  Time  he  revived. 

The  next  Day,  viz,  Wednefday,  0<f?tf3.  7.  His  Brother  yehn 
arrived,  being  returned  from  New-Jerfey  ;  where  he  had  been 
detained  much  longer  than  he  intended,  by  a  mortal  sicknefs 
prevailing  among  theChriftian  ]ndians,2nd  by  feme  othcrThings 
in  their  Circumftances  that  made  his  Stay  with  them  n-cefTary. 
Mr.  Brainerd  was  afFeded  and  refrefh'd  with  feeing  him,  and 
appeared  fully  fatisfied  with  the  Reafons  of  his  DeJay  ;  feeing 
the  Intercft  of  Religion  and  of  the  Souls  of  his  People  required 

It, 

The  next  Day,  Thurfday,Oi?fi^.  8.  He  was  in  great  Diflrefs 
and  Agonies  of  Body  ;  and  for  the  bigger  Part  of  the  Day,  was 
much  difordered  as  to  the  Exercife  of  his  Reafon.  In  theEven- 
\i\v,  he  was  more  compofed,  and  had  the  Ufe  of  his  Reafon 
well  ;"  but  the  Pain  of  his  Body  continued  and  increafed.  He 
told  me,  it  wasimpoffible  ior  any  to  conceive  of  the  Ui^xtk  he 
felt  in  his  Breaft.  He  manifefled  much  Concern  left  he  (hould 
diflioncurGod  by  Impatience, under  his  extremeAgony  ;  which 
was  fuch,  that  he  faid,  the  Thought  of  enduring  it  one  Minute 
longer  was  almoft  infupportable.  He  defired,that  others  would 
be  much  in  lifting  up  their  Hearts  continually  to  God  for  him, 
that  God  would  fupport  him,  and  give  him  Patience.     He  fig- 


forc her  Death;  and  faid  on  her  Death-Bed,  ihdii  f})e had 
notfeen  one  Minute  for  fever al  Tears,  wherein  ftje  defined  to 
live  one  Minute  longer,  for  the  fake  of  any  other  Good  in 
Life,  but  doing  Gocd^living  to  Godj  and  doing  what  might  be 

fsr  hit  Glory,. 

*  Oified, 


efMr»  DaTid  Brainerd*    A.D.  1747.    25  j 

ni§ccJ,  thst  he  expeded  to  die  that  Night  ;  but  feem'd  to  fear 
»J«n£;ci  Dc\?.y/.  and  the  DifpofK^onof  his  Mind  with  Regard 
to  Death  appeareci  ilill  the  fame  that  it  had  been  all  along.  And 
KotwifhftanJing  bis  bodily  Agonies,  yet  the  Intereft  of  Zionhy 
ftill  vvilb  grcHt  Weight  on  his  Mind  -,  as  appeared  by  fome  con- 
iiderable  Dircourfe  he   had  that  Evening,  with    the  Rev.  Mr, 
BUling^   ene  of  the  neighbouring  Minifters  (who  was  then  pre- 
feiH  )  concerning  the  great  Importance  of  the  Work  of  theMi- 
niftry,  ^c.  And  afterwards,  when  it  was  very  late  in  theNight, 
he  had  much  very  proper  ar.d  profitable  DifcoUrfc  with  his 
Brother  yohn,  concerning  his  Congregation  in  New-Jerfey^^vA 
the  Interef!  of  Religion  among  the  Indiana     In  the  latter  Pare 
of  the  Night,  his  bodily  Diftrefs  Teemed   to  rife  to  a  greater 
Height  than  ever  ;  and  he  faid  to  thofe  then  about  him,   that  it 
was  another  Thing  to  die,  than  People  imagined  ;  explaining  him- 
felf  to  mean  that  they  were  not  aware  what  bodily  Pain  and  An- 
guifh  is  undergone  before  Death.  Towards  Day, his  Eyes  fix*d  ; 
and  he  continued  lying  immovable,  'till  about  6  o'Clock  in  the 
Morning,  and  then  expired,  on  Friday,  OSiob.  9. 1747.   whea 
his  Soul, as  wc  may  well  conclude, was  received  by  hi^dcarLord 
and  Mafter,  as  an  eminently  faithful  Servant,  into  that  State  of 
Perfedtion  ofHoliners,andFruition  oiGod, which  he  had  fo  often 
and  fo  ardently  longed  for  ;  and  was  Welcomed  by  the  glorious 
AfTembly  in  the  upper  World,  as  one  peculiarly  fitted  to  join 
them  in  their  bleiled  Employment*  and  Enjoyments. 

Much  Refpedt  was  (hewn  to  his  Memory  at  his  Funeral ; 
which  was  on  the  Monday  following,  after  a  Sermon  preach 'd 
the  fame  Day,  on  that  folemn  Cccafion.  His  Funeral  was  at- 
tended by  eight  of  the  neighbouring  Minifters,  and  feventcen 
other  Gentlemen  of  liberal  Education,  and  a  great  Concourfc 
of  People. 


€J'SC®#SS®®S®5J®^®®®  ^^%%m^%'^  s^ss 


©S^^^SeCSg^^Q^'Je^^S^g^SS^I** 


asi  ^e  LIFE 


Some  further  REMAINS  of  the   Rev. 
Mr.  David  Brainerd. 

[I.]  A  Scheme  oFa  D/W^^«^  between  the  vmouiPowers 
and  AffeBions  of  the  Mind,  as  they  are  found  alter- 
ratcly  whifperipg  in  thr  godly  Soul.  [Mention'd  in  his 
Dwry,  Feb.  3.  1744.] 

I*  ^nr^HE  Vnaer/ianding  introduced,  (i)  As  difcovering  it's 
I  own  Excellency,  and  Capacity  of  enjoying  the  moft 
•^  fublime  Pleafure  and  Happinefs.  (2)  As  obferving 
it's  Define  equal  to  it's  Capacity,  and  incapable  of  being fatisfi- 
cd  with  any  Thing  'hat  will  not  fill  it  in  the  utmoftExtent  of  it's 
Exercife.  (3  )  As  finding  it  felf  a  dependent  Thing,  not  Seif- 
fufficient  ;  and  confequently  unable  to  fpin  Happinefs  (  as  the 
Spider  fpins  it's  Web)  out  of  it's  own  Bowels.  This  Self-fuffi- 
ciency  obfcrved  to  be  the  Property  and  Prerogative  of  GOD 
alone,  and  not  belonging  to  any  created  Being.  (4  )  As  in  vain 
feeking  fublime  Pleafure,  Satisfadionjand  Happinefs  adequate  to 
it's  Nature,  amongit  created  {  eings.  The  Search  and  Know- 
ledge of  the  Truth  in  the  natural  World  allowed  indeed  to  be  re- 
frefhing  to  the  Mind  ;  but  fiill  failing  to  afford  compleat  Hap- 
pinefs. (5)  As  difcovering  ihe  Excellency  and  Glory  of  GOD, 
that  he  is  the  Fountain  of  Goodnefs,  and  Well  Spring  of  Happi- 
nefs, and  every  Way  fit  to  anfwer  the  enlarged  DefiresandCrav- 
ings  of  our  immortal  Souls. 

«.  The  //;//  introduced,  ss  neceflarily,  yet  freely  chufing 
this  GOD  for  it's  fupreme  Happinefs  and  only  Portion,  fully 
complyingwith  theUnderffanding'sDi£\ates,acquiefcing  inGOD 
2s  the  beft  Good,  his  WjiJ  as  the  belt  Rule  for  intelligent  Crea- 
tures, and  rejoicing  that  GOD  is  in  every  Refpecl  juft  what  he 
is  ;  and  withal  chufing  and  delighting  to  be  a  dependent  Crea- 
ture, always  rubje6t  to  this  GOD,  not  afpiring  atterSelf-fulfici* 
cncj'  and  Supremacy,   h]x\  acquiefcing  in  the  contrary. 

3.  Ardent 


of  Mr,  David  Brainerd:  255 

3.  Ardent  Love  or  Dejlre  introduced,  as  paflioriately  longing 
it  pleafe  and  glorify  the  Divine  Being,  to  be  in  every  RefpeS 
conformed  to  him,  and  in  that  Way  to  enjoy  him.  This  Love 
ot  Defire  reprefented  as  molt  genuine  ;  not  induced  by  meaa 
and  mercenary  Views;  not  primarily  fpringing  from  felfifh 
^ Hopes  of  Salvation,  whereby  the  divine  Glories  would  be  Sacri- 
ficed to  the  Idol  Self ;  not  arifing  ftom  a  flavifh  Fear  of  Divine 
Anger  in  Cafe  of  Negle(5l,  nor  yet  from  Hopes  of  feeling  the 
Sweetnefs  of  that  tender  and  pleafant  PaiTicn  of  Love  in  one's 
ownBreaft ;  but  from  a  juftEfteem  of  the  beauteousObjed  beloy- 
ed.  This  Z6z><?  further  reprefented,  as  attended  with  vehement 
Longings  after  the  Enjoyment  of  it's  Obje6t,  but  unable  to  find 
by  what  Means. 

4.  The  Under/} anding  again  introduced, as  informing(i.)How 
God  might  have  been  enjoyed, yea^how  he  muft  necefTarily  have 
been  enjoyed,  had  not  Man  fm'd  againft  him  ;  that  as  there  was 
KnowUdge^LikeneJs^2kr\6Love^{o  there  muft  needs  beEnjoyment, 
while  there  was  no  Impediment.  ( 2. )  How  he  may  be  en- 
joyed in  feme  Meafure  now,  vi%.  by  the  fame  Knowledge  be- 
getting Likenefi  and  Lovt^  which  will  be  anfwer*d  with  Returns 
of  Lcve,  and  the  Smiles  of  God's  Countenance,  which  are 
better  than  Life.  (  3.  )  How  God  may  be  perfectly  en- 
joyed, viz.  by  the  SouPs  -perfect  Freedom  from  Sin.  This 
perfect  Freedom  never  obtain'd  *till  Death  ;  and  then  not  by 
any  unaccountable  Means,  or  in  any  unheard-of  Manner  ;  but 
the  fame  by  which  it  has  obtain'd  fomeLikenefs  to  andFruition 
of  God  in  thisWorld,  viz,  a  clear  Manifeftation  of  him. 

5.  Holy  Defire  appears,  and  enquires  why  the  Soul  may  not 
beperfe^ly  holy  ;  and  fo  perfedt  in  theEnjoymentofGod  here  ; 
and  cxpreffes  moft  infatiableThirftuigs  after  fucha  Temper,and 
fuch  Fruition,  and  moft  confummate  Blefledoefs. 

6.  Vnderftanding  again  appears,  and  informs,  that  God 
(Jefigns  that  thofe  whom  he  fan£tifies  in  Part  here,  and  intends 
for  immortalGlory,{hall  tarry  a  whilc-m  this  prefcnt  evil  World, 
that  their  own  Experience  of  Temptations  l^c.  may  teach  *em 
bow  great  the  Deliverance  is,  which  God  has  wrought  for  *em, 
that  they  may  be  fwallowed  up  in  Thankfulnefs  and  Admira- 
tion toEternity  3  as  alfo  that  they  may  be  inftrumental  of  doing 
Good  to  their  Fellow- Men.  Now  if  they  were  perfectly 
holy  ^c,  a  World  of  Sin  would  not  be  a  fit  Habitation  for 
them  :  and  further, fuch  Manifeftations  of  God  as  are  necefTary 
compleatiy  to  fandtify  the  Soul,  would  be  infupportable  to  the 
Body,  fo  that  we  can't  fee  God  and  live, 

L  1  7.  Holy 


256  7be  LIFE 

7  Holy  Impatience  is  next  introducedjcomplaining  of  theSinJ 
and  Sorrows  of  Life,  and  almoft  repining  at  the  Diftance  of  a 
State  of  Perfedion,  uneafy  to  fee  and  feel  the  Hours  hang  fo 
dull  and  heavy,  and  almoft  concluding  that  the  Temptations, 
Hardfliip?,  DifappointmentSjImperfedionf,  and  tediousEmploy- 
ments  of  Life  will  never  come  to  a  happy  Period. 

8.  Tender  Confcience  comes  in,  an^  meekly  reproves  thtf 
Complaints  0/  Impatience  ;  urging  how  careful  and  watchful  we 
ought  to  be,  left  we  fhoujd  offend  the  divine  Being  with  Com- 
plaints ;  alledging  alfo  the  Fitnefs  of  our  waiting  patiently  upon 
God  for  all  we  want,  and  that  in  a  Way  of  doing  and  fufFering; 
and  at  the  fame  Time  mentioning  the  Barrennefsof  the  Soul, 
how  much  precious  Time  it  mifimproved,  and  how  little  it  has 
enjoyed  of  God,  compared  with  what  it  might  have  done  ;  as 
alio  fuggefting  how  frequently  impatient  Complaints  fpring 
from  nothing  better  than  Self-love,  want  of  Refignation,  and 
a  greater  Reverence  of  the  Divine  Being. 

9.  Judgment  or  foufid  Adind  next  ^ppe&rs,  and  duly  weighs 
the  Complaints  of  Impatience^  and  the  gentle  Admonitions  of 
tender  Confcience^  and  impartially  determines  between  'em.  On 
the  ctfie  hand,  it  concludes,  that  we  may  always  be  impatient 
with  Sin  ;  and  fuppofe-,  that  we  may  alfo  with  fuch  Sorrow, 
Pain,  and  Difcouragement,  as  hinder  our  Purfuit  of  Holinefs, 
tho'  they  arife  from  the  weaknefs  of  Nature.  It  allows  us  to 
be  impatient  of  the  Diftance  at  which  we  ftand  from  a  State 
of  Perfedlion  and  Blefiednefs.  It  further  indulges  Impatience 
at  the  Delay  of  Time,  when  we  defire  the  Period  of  it  for  no 
other  End  than  that  we  may  with  Angels  be  employed  in  the 
moft  lively  fpiritual  AcSls  of  Devotion,  and  in  giving  all  poflible 
Glory  to  him  that  lives  forever.  Temptations  and  fmful  Im- 
pcrfcdions,  it  thinks  we  may  juftly  be  uneafy  with  ;  and  Dif- 
appointments,  at  leaft  thofe  that  relate  to  our  Hopes,  of  Com- 
munion with  God,  and  growing  Conformity  to  him.  And  as 
to  the  tedious  Employments  and  Hardfhips  of  Life,  it  fuppofes 
feme  Longing  for  the  End  of  *cm  not  inconfiftent  with  a  Spirit 
of  Eaithfulncfs,  and  a  chearful  Difpofition  to  perform  the  ore 
and  endure  the  other  :  It  fuppofes,  that  a  faithful  Servant,  vho 
fully  dcfigns  to  do  all  he  poiTably  can,  may  ftill  juftly  long  for 
thcEveniiig;  and  that  no  rationalMan  would  blame  his  kind  and 
tender  Spoufejf  he  perceived  her  longing  to  be  with  him, while 
yetFaithfulnefs  &Duty  to  him  might  ftilliinduce  her  to  yield, for 
the  pre^nt,  to  remain  at  a  painful  Diftance  from  him. —  On 
theoihei  Ha  id, it  approves  of  the'Jaution,  Care  and  Watchful- 

nefs 


of  Mr.  David  Brainerd.  257 

ticts  of  fender  Con/denceyhtt.  theDivine  Being  fiiould  be  offended 
with  impatient  Coniplainis  :  It  acknowledges  iheFitnefspf  our 
waiting  upon  God,  in  a  Way  of  patient  doing  and  fuffering  ;  But 
fuppofes  this  very  confiftent  with  ardent  Delires  to  ikpart  and  to 
he  with  Chrijf.  It  owns  it  fit  that  we  (liould  always  remember 
our  own  Barrennefs,and  thinks  alfo  that  we  fliould  be  impatient 
of  it,  and  confequently  long  for  a  State  of  Freedom  from  it  ; 
and  this,  not  fo  much  that  we  may  ittl  the  Happinefs  of  it,  but 
that  God  may  have  the  Glory.  It  grants,  that  impatient  Com- 
plaints often  rpring  from  Self-love,  and  Want  of  Rcfignation  and 
Humility.  Such  as  thefe  it  difapproves  ;  and  determines,  we 
(hould  be  impatient  only  of  Abfencefrom  God,&;  Diilanccfrom 
that  State  and  Temper  wherein  we  may  moft  glorify  him. 

10.  Godly  Sorrow  introduced,  as  making  her  fad  Moan,  not 
fo  much  that  jfhe  is  kept  from  the  free  Pofl'effion  and  full  Enjoy- 
ment of  Happinefs,  but  that  God  muft  be  difiionoured  ;  the 
Soul  being  ftill  in  a  World  of  Sin,  and  itfelf  imperfect.  She 
here,  with  Grief,  counts  overpaft  Faults, prefent  Temptations, 
and  Fears  for  the  future. 

11.  Hope  or  hofy  Confidence  zi^pezrs,  and  feems  perrwaded 
that  nothing  fhall  ever  fepar ate  the  Soul  from  the  Love  of  God  in 
Chriji  Jefus,  It  expedls  divine  AiTiftance  and  Grace  Sufficient 
for  all  the  doing  and  fuffering- Work  of  Time,  and  that  Death 
will  ere  long  put  a  happy  Period  to  all  Sin  and  Sorrow  ;  and 
fo  takes  Occafion  to  rejoyce. 

12.  Godly  Fear,  ox  holy  Jeakufy  here  fleps  in,  and  fuggefls 
feme  timorous  Apprehenfions  of  the  Danger  of  Deception  ; 
mentions  the  Deccitfulnefs  of  the  Heart,  the  great  Influence  of 
irregular  Self- Love  in  a  fallen  Creature;  enquires  whether  it 
felf  is  not  likely  to  have  fallen  in  with  Delufion,  fince  the  Mind 
is  fo  dark,  and  fo  little  of  GOD  appears  to  the  Soul  ;  and  que- 
ries whether  all  lt*s  Hopes  of  perfevering  Grace  mayn't  bePre- 
fumption,  and  whether  it*s  confident  Expe£lations  of  meeting 
Death  as  a  Friend,  mayn't  ilTue  in  Difappointment. 

13.  Hereupon,  jR^fJ7/i7«  appeals,  and  minds  the  Perfon  of 
his  paft  Experiences  ;  as  to  the  preparatory  Work  of  Convi6li- 
on  and  Humiliation  ;  TheView  he  then  had  of  the  Impoffibility 
of  Salvation, from  himfelf,  or  any  created  Arm  :  TheManifefta- 
tion  he  has  likewife  had  of  the  Glory  of  GOD  in  Jefu:  Chri/i  : 
How  he  then  admired  that  Glory,  and  chofe  that  GOD  for  his 
only  Portion,  becaufe  of  the  Excellency  and  Amiablenefs  he  dif- 
covered  in  him  ;  not  from  flavifh  Fear  of  being  damned,  if  he 
did  not,  nor  from  bafe  and  mercenary  Hopes  of  faving  himfelf; 

L  1  2  buj 


258 


The  LIFE 


but  from  a  juft  Eftecm  of  that  bwuteoHs  and  glorious  Obje£l : 
As  alfo  how  he  had  from  Time  toTime  rejoyced  and  acquiefced 
in  GOD,  for  what  he  is  in  himfelf ;  being  delighted,  that  he  is 
infinite  in  Holinefs,  Juftice,  Power,  Sovereignty,  as  well  as  in 
Mercy,  Goodnefs  and  Love  ;  How  he  has  likewife  ,  Scores  of 
Times,  felt  his  Soul  mourn  for  Sin,  for  this  very  Reafon,becaufe 
it  is  contrary  and  grievous  to  GOD  ;  yea, how  he  has  mourned 
over  one  vain  and  impertinent  Thought,  when  he  has  been  fo 
far  from  Fear  cf  the  divine  vindictive  Wrath  for  it,  that  on  the 
contrary  he  has  enjoyed  the  highefl  Aflurance  of  the  divine  ever- 
lafting  Love  :  How  he  has,  from  Time  to  Time,  delighted  in 
the  Commands  of  God,  for  their  own  Purity  and  Perk6tion, 
and  longed  exceedingly  to  be  conformed  to  *em,and  even  to  be 
holy  as  GOD  is  holy  ;  and  counted  it  prefent  Heaven,  to  be  of 
a  heavenly  Temper  :  How  he  has  frequently  rejoyced, to  think 
of  being  for  ever  fubjeCl  to,  U  dependent  on  GOD  ;  account- 
ing it  infinitely  greater  Happinefs  to  glorify  God  in  a  State  of 
Subje^ion  to,  and  Dependence  on  him,  than  to  be  a  god  him- 
felf ;  and  how  Heaven  it  felf  would  be  no  Heaven  to  him, if  he 
could  not  there  be  every  Thing  thatGOD  would  have  him  be. 
14.  ypon  this,  iS^/r/VW  5^»y(?//^«  being  awaked,  comes  in, 
and  declares  (hat  She  now  feels  &  tajies  that  theLord  is  graciousi 
that  he  is  the  only  fupreme  Good,  the  only  Soul-fatisfying  Hap- 
pinefg  ;  that  he  is  acompleat,  felf-fufficient,  and  almighty  Por- 
tion. She  whifpers,  PFhom  have  1  in  Heaven  bat  this  GOD, 
this  dear  and  bieiTed  Portion  ;  and  there  is  none  upon  Earth  I  defire 
befides  him.  Oh,  'tisHeaven,to  pleafehira  and  to  be  juft  what 
he  would  have  me  be  !  O  that  my  Soul  were  holy^asGodis  holy  ; 
O  that  it  was  pure,  as  Chriji  is  pure  j  ^n6perfe£f  as  my  Father  in 
Heaven  isperfeSi.  Thcfe  are  the  fweetefi  Commands  in  God's 
Book,  comprizing  all  others  ;  and  fhall  I  break  'em  ?  Muft  I 
break  'em  ?  Am  J  under  a  fatal  Neceflity  of  it,  as  long  as  I  live 
in  this  World  ?  Oh  my  Soul !  VVo,  Wo  is  me,  that  I  am  a 
Sinner  !  Becaufe  I  now  nectli'arily  grieve  and  oflTend  this  blclTed 
GOD,  who  is  infinire  in  Goodnefs  and  Grace,  Oh,methinks, 
fhould  be  punifh  me  for  my  Sins,  it  would  not  wound  myHeart 
fo  deep  to  ofFv-nd  him  :  But,  tho*  1  fin  continually,  he  continu- 
ally repeats  his  Kindncfs  towards  me  !  Oh,  methinks  I  could 
,bear  anv  Suffsfring  ;  but  how  can  I^bear  to  grieve  and  difhonour 
this  blcfFed  God  !  How  fhali  I  give  ten  Thoufand  Times  more 
Honour  to  him  ?  What  fhall  1  do,  to  glorify  and  worfhip  this 
beft  of  Beings  ?  O  that  I  could  confecrate  my  felf,Soul  and  Body, 
to  his  Service  for  ever,     0  ih*Jt  I  cugld  givq  up  my  felf  tQ  him. 

fa 


of  Mr,  David  Brainerd.  259 

fo  as  never  more  to  attempt  to  be  my  own,  or  to  have  any  Will 
or  AiFedlions  that  are  not  perfectly  conformed  to  his.  But  Oh, 
Alas,  Alas  !  I  can't,  I  feel  I  can't,  be  thus  entirely  devoted  to 
GOD  :  I  can't  live  and  fin  not.  O  ycAngelsy^o  ye  glorify  him 
inceflaotly  :  If  poirible,exert  your  felves  ftill  more,  in  more  live- 
ly and  ardent  Devotion  :  If  poflible,  proftrate  your  felves  flili 
lower  before  the  Throne  of  the  bhefled  King  of  Heaven  :  I  long 
to  bear  a  Part  with  you,  and  if  it  were  poflible,  to  help  you. 
Yet  when  we  have  done,  we  fhall  not  be  able  to  ofFer  the  ten 
Thoufandth  Part  of  the  Homage  he  is  worthy  of.  While yj^/ri- 
tual  Senfation  whifpered  thefe  Things,  Fear  and  Jeahufy  were 
greatly  overcome  ;  and  the  Soul  replied,  IsSow  1  know^andam 
ojfured^  &c.  and  again  it  weleom'd  Death  as  a  Friend,  faying, 
O  Deaths  where  is  thy  Stingy  &c. 

15.  Finally,  Holy  Refolution  concludes  the  Difcourfe,  fixedly 
determining  to  follow  hard  after  GOD  ^znd  continually  to  purfue 
a  Life  of  Conformity  to  him.  And  the  better  to  purfue  this, en* 
joining  it  on  the  Soul  always  to  remember,  that  God  is  the  on- 
ly fource  of  Happinefs,  that  his  Will  is  the  only  Rule  of  Recti- 
tude to  an  intelligent  Creature,  that  Earth  has  nothing  in  it 
defirable  for  it  felf,orany  further  than  GOD  is  feen  in  it ;  and 
that  the  Knowledge  of  God  in  Chrift,  begetting  and  maintain- 
ing Love,  and  mortifying  fenfual  and  flefhly  Appetites,  is  thq 
Way  to  be  holy  on  Earth,  and  fo  to  be  attempered  to  the  com- 
pjeat  Holinefs  of  the  heavenly  World, 


[II.  ]  Some  glomy  and  defponding  Thoughts  of  a  Soul 
under  ConviSions  of  Sin,  and  Concern  for  it's  eter- 
nal Salvation. 

I.  T  Believe,  my  Cafe  h /insular,   that  none  ever  had  fo  many 
*  ftrange  and  different  Thoughts  and  Feelings  as  I. 

2.  I  have  been  concerned  much  longer  than  many  others^  that 
I  have  known  or  read  of,  who  have  been  favingly  convertedy  and 
yet  I  am  left. 

3.  I  have  with/food  the  Power  of  ConviSfiom  a  longTime,ana 
therefore  I  fear,  1  fhall  be  finally  left  of  God. 

4.  I  never  fhall  be  converted,  without  (ironger  Convi£lion$, 
and  greater  Terrors  of  Confcience. 

5.  1  don't  aim  at  the  Glory  ofGoD  IH  any  Thing  I  do,  and 
tkcreforc  1  can't  hope  for  Mercy. 


26o  r^<f  L I F  E 

6*  I  don't  fee  the  Evil  Nature  of  Sin,  nor  the  Sin  of  myNfl- 
turii  and  therefore  I  am  difcouraged. 

7.  The  more  IJirive,  the  more  blind  and  hard  my  Heart  is, 
and  the  worfe  I  grow  continually. 

8.  I  fear,  God  never  {hew*d  Mercy  to  one  fo  vile  as  I. 

9.  I  fear,  I  am  not  eleSied^  and  therefore  muft  perifli. 

1 0.  I  fear,  the  Day  of  Grace  is  paji  with  me. 

11.  I  fear,  I  have  committed  the  unpardonable  Sin. 

12.  I  am  an  0/^  Sinner  ;  and  if  God  had  defigned  Mercy  for 
me,  he  would  have  called  me  Home  to  himfelf  before  now* 


[  III."  3  Some  Signs  of  Godlinefs. 

The  diftinguifhing  Marks  o^  ztrueChriHian,  taken  from 
one  of  my  old  Manufcripts ;  where  I  wrote  as  / 
felt  and  experienced,  and  net  from  any  confiderable 
Degree  of  do(Srinal  Knowledge,  or  Acquaintance 
with  the  Sentiments  of  others  in  this  Point. 

I.  TJ  E  has  a  true  Knowledge  of  the  Glory   and  Excellency  of 
*^  God,  that  he  is  mod  worthy  to  be  loved  and  praifed 
for  his  own  divine  Perfections.  Pfal,  CXLV.  3. 

2:  God  is  his  Portion,  Pfal.  LXXIII.  25.  Aad  God's 
Ghry^  his  great  Concern.  Matth,  VI.  22. 

3.  Holinefs  is  his  Delight ;  nothing  he  fo  much  longs  for,as  to 
be  noJy,  as  God  is  holy.  Phil.  III.  9,  12. 

4.  Sin  is  his  greateft  Enemy.  This  he  hates,  for  it's  own 
Nature,  for  what  it  is  in  it  felf,  being  contrary  to  a  holy  GOD. 
yer.  II.  I.  And  confequently  he  hates  all  Sin.  Rcm>  ^U.  24. 
I  Job.  \\L  9. 

5.  The  Laws  0/  GOD  alfo  are  his  Delight.  P/al.CXlX.gy. 
Rem.  VII.  22.  Thefe  he  obferves,  not  out  of  Conftraint,  from 
a  fervile  Fear  of  Hell  ;  but  they  arehisChoice.  P/al.CXlX*^o* 
The  ftri£i  Obfervance  of  them  is  not  his  Bondage,  but  his  great- 
eft  Liberty,  ver.  45, 


[IV.]  I^TTERS, 


tf/ Mr.  David  Brainerd.  261 

[IV.  ]  L  E  T  T  E  R  S,  written  by  Mr.  Braincrd  to 
his  Friends. 


M^ 


ADVERTISEMENT. 

,  ^  R.  Brainerd  had  a  large  Acquaintance  and  Correfpondence, 
^'^  efpecially  in  the  latter  Part  of  his  Life,  and  he  did  much 
at  writing  Letters  to  his  abfentFriends  ;  but  the  moft  of  his  Ac- 
quaintance living  at  a  great  Diftance  from  me,  I  have  not  been 
able  to  obtain  Copies  of  many  that  he  wrote :  However,  the 
greater  Part  of  jhofe  which  I  have  fcen,are  fuch  as  appear  to  me 
of  profitable  Tendency,  and  worthy  of  the  publick  View  :  £ 
have    therefore  here  added  a  few  of  his  Letters. 

N.  B.  Several  of  thefe  which  follow,  are  not  publiflicd  at 
large,  becaufe  fome  Parts  of  them  were  concerning  particular 
Affairs  of  a  private  Nature. 

No.  I.  To  his  Brother  John,  then  a  Student  at  Tale-CsHfgi 
in  New- Haven, 

Kaunaumeeky  April  30.  174.3. 
Dear  Brother, 
T  Should  tell  you,  /  long  to  fee  you,  but  that  my  ownExperience 
*■  has  taught  me,  there  is  no  Happinefs,  &  plcnarySatisfadion 
to  be  enjoyed,  in  earthly' Friends,  tho*  ever  fo  near  and  dear,  or 
in  any  other  Enjoyment,  that  is  not  God  himfelf.  Therefore, 
U  the  God  of  all  Grace  would  be  pleafed  gracioufly  to  afFord  us 
each  his  Prefence  and  Grace,  that  we  may  perform  the  Work, 
and  endure  the  Trials  he  calls  us  to,  in  a  moft  diftreiTing  tire- 
fome  Wildernefs,  *till  we  arrive  at  our  Journey's  End  ;  the  lo- 
cal Diftance,  at  which  we  are  held  from  each  other  at  the  pre- 
fent,  is  a  Matter  of  no  great  Moment  or  Importance  to  eiihcr  of 

lis.     But  Alas  !  The  Prefence  of  God  is  what  I  want. • 

I  live  in  the  moft  lonely  me!ancholyZ)^/^rf,  about  18  Miles  from 
Albany  (for  it  was  not  thought  beft  that  1  fliould  go  to  Delaiuare-' 
River,  as  I  believe  I  hinted  to  you  in  a  Letter  from  NewTork.) 
1  board  with  a  poor  Scotch-Man  :  His  Wife  can  talk  fcarce  any 
En^lijh.  My  Diet  confifts  moftly  of  Hafty-  Pudding,boirdCorn, 
and  Bread  baked  in  the  Afhes,  and  fomctimes  a  little  Meat  and 
Butter.  My  Lodging  b  a  little  Henp  of  Straw,  laid  upon  fome 
Boards,  a  little  Way  from  the  Groun<i  :  Fcr  it  is  a  Log-Room, 

without 


2^2  The  LIFE 

without  any  Floor,  that  I  lodge  in.  My  Worj^  is  exceeding 
hard  and  difficult :  I  travel  on  Foot  a  MHe  and  half,  the  worft 
of  Way,    almoft  daily,  and  back  again  ;   for  I  live  fo  far  from 

my  Indians I  have  not  feen  an  Engli/h  Perfon  thisMonth. — • 

Thefe,  and  many  otherCiroumftances,  as  uncomfortable, attend 
me  ;  and  yet  my  fpiritualConJliSfs  and  Diflrejfes  fo  far  exceed  zW 
thefe,  that  I  fcarce  think  of  them,  or  hardly  mind  but  that  I 
am  entertain*d  in  the  moft  fumptuous  Manner.  The  Lord 
grant  that  I  may  learn  to  endure  HardneJsyOi  a  goodSoldier  of]  Esvs 
Christ.  As  to  my  Succe/s  here^  I  can't  fay  much  as  yet  : 
The  Indians  feem  generally  kind,  and  well  difpofed  towards  me, 
and  are  moftly  very  attentive  to  my  Inftrudions,  and  feem 
willing  to  be  taught  further:  Two  or  three,  I  hope,  are  under 
fome  Convi^ions  ;  But  there  feems  to  be  little  of  the  fpecial 
workings  of  the  divine  Spirit  among  them  yet  ;  which  gives 
me  many  a  Heart-finking  Hour.  Sometimes  I  hope,  God  hais 
abundant  Bleflings  in  Store  for  them  and  me  ;  but  at  other 
Times  I  am  fo  over- whelmed  with  Diftrefs,  that  I  can't  fee  how 
bis  Dealings  with  me  are  confiftent  with  Covenant-Love  and 
Faithfulnefs,  and  I  fay,  Surely  his  tender  Mercies  are  clean  gone 

for  ever -But  however,  1  fee,  I  needed  all   this  Chajli/ement 

already  :  'Tis  good  for  me^  that  I  have  endured  thefe  Trials,  and 
have  hitherto  little  or  po  apparent  Succefs.  Don't  be  difcou- 
raged  by  my  DiihcfTes  :  I  was  under  great  Diftrefs,  at  Mr. 
Pomroy'iy  when  I  faw  you  laft ;  but  God  has  been  with  me  of  a 
Truths  fince  that :  He  helped  me  fometimes  fweetly  at  Long- 
Iflandy  and  elfewhere.  But  let  us  always  remember,  that  we 
njuft  through  much  Tribulation  enter  mto  God's  eternal  Kingdom 
of  Refl  and  Peace.  The  Righteous  are  f(.arcely  faved  :  Tis  an 
infinite  Wonder,  that  we  have  well-grounded  Hopes  of  being 
faved  at  all.  For  my  Part,  I  feel  the  moft?/;7#of  any  Creature 
living  ;  and  I  am  fure  fometimes,   there  is  not  fuch  another  ex- 

ifting  on  this  Side  Hel! Now,  all  you  can  do  for  me, is,  to 

pray  incefl'antly,  that  God  would  make  me  humble,  holy,  re- 
fttrncd,  and  heavenly-minded,  by  all  my  Trials.  Be Ji rang 

in  the  Lord,  and  in  the  Power  of  his  Might.  Let  us  run^  wre/lle 
2ii\d /ight,  that  we  may  win  the  Prize,  and  obtain  thatcompleat 
Happinefs,  to  be  Holy  as  God  is  Holy.  So,  wifhing  and  praying 
that  you  may  advance  in  Learning  and  Grace,  and  be  fit  for 
fpecial  Service  (or   God,     I  remain 

Your  aiFe6\ionate  Brother, 

ii>.  Brainerd. 

No»  ^. 


ef  Mr.  David  BrainerdJ  '26"? 

No.  2.    To  his  Brother  John,  at  Tale- College  in  Nnu- Haven. 
Kaunaumeek,  December  27.  1743/ 
Dear  Brother, 
T  Long  to  fee  you,  and  know  how  you  fare  In  your  Journey 
-*   thro'  a  World  of  incxpreffible  Sorrow,  where  we  are  com- 
pafs'd  about  with  Fanity,  Confufton  Tind  Vexation  of  Spirit.  I  am 
more  wearv  of  Life,  I  think, than  ever  I  was.  The  whole  IVorld 
appean  to  me  like  a  huge  Vacuum,  a  vaft  empty  Space,  whence 
nothing  defirablcjOr  at  leaft  faii5fa£tory,can  poiTibly  be  derived  5 
and  I  long,  daily  to  die  more   and  more  to  it  ^  even  tho'  I  ob- 
tain not  that  Comfort  from  fpiritual  Things,  which  I  earneftly 
defire.     Worldly  Pleafures,  fuch  as  flow  from  Greatnefs, Riches, 
Honours,  &  fcnfualGratifications,are  infinitely  worfe  than  none. 
May  the  Lord  deliver  us  more  and  more  from  thefe  Vanities.  I 
have  rpent  moft  of  the  Fall  and  Winter  hitherto  in  a  \try  weak 
State  of  Body  ;  and  fometimcs   under   prefling  inward   Trials 
and  fpiritual  Conflifls  :  but  having  obtained  Help  from  God,  L 
continue  to  this  Day  ;  and  am  now  fomething  better  in  Healthy 
than  I  was   fometime  ago.     I  find  nothing  more  conducive  ta 
a  Life  of   CAr/>?/^«;/y,  than  a  diligent,   induftrious  and  faithful 
Improvement  of  precious  Time.     Let  us  then  faithfully  per- 
form that  Bufinefs,  which  is  allotted  to  us  by  divineProvidence, 
to  the  utmoft  of  our  bodily  Strength,  and  mentalVigour.   Why 
fhould  we  fink,andgrow  difcouraged,with  any  particuIarTrials» 
and  Perplexities,  we  are  called  to   encounter  in  the  World  ? 
Death  and  Eternity  are  juft  before  us  ;  a    few  toiTing  Billows 
more  will  waft  us  into  the  World  of  Spirits,  and  we  hope  (thro' 
infinite  Grace  )  intoendlefs   Pleafures,  and  uninterrupted  Reft 
and  Peace.     Let  us  then  run  with  Patience  the  Race  fet  before  us, 
Heb.  xii.  i,  2.     And  Oh  that  we  could  depend  more  upon  the 
living  GOD,  and  Icfs  upon  our  own  Wifdom  and  Strength.--— 
Dear  Brother,  may  the  God  of  all  Grace  comfort  your  Heart, 
and  fucceed  your  Studies, and  make  you  an  Inftrumcnt  of  Good 
to  his  People  in  your  Day.    This  is  the  conftant  Prayer  of 
Your  afFedtionate  Brother : 

David  Brainerd* 

No.  3.     To  his  Brother  JfraeU  at  Haddam, 

Kaunaumeekyaw.  21.  1743,4 
My  Dear  Brother, 
— T^Here  is  but  «»#  Thing,  that  deferves  our  higheft 
Care  and  moft  ardent  Dcfires  ^  and  that  is,  tha{ 
We  may  apfwcr  the  gisat Jfn^,for  which  we  were  made  j  viz.io 


264  ne  LIFE 

glorify  that  God,  who  has  given  us  ourBeings  and  all  ourCom- 
forts,  and  do  all  the  Good,  wc  pofTibly  can,  to  our  Fellow- Men 
while  we  live  in  the  World  :  And  verily  Life  is  not  worth  the 
having,  if  It  be  not  improved  for  this  noble  End  and  Purpofc. 
Yet,  alas,  how  little  \^  this  thought  of  among  Mankind  '  Moft 
Mcnfeem  to//7;^  to  ihemfehes,  without  much  Regard  to  the 
Glory  of  God,  or  the  Good  of  their  Fellow-Crcatures  ;  they 
earneftly  de{ire,and  eagerly  purfue  after  theRiches,theHonours. 
and  the  Pleafures  ofLife,as  if  they  really  fuppofed,  thatWcaltb, 
or  Oreatnefs,  or  Merriment,  could  make  their  immortal  Souls 

A  Pfl'  r.V'r  ^^f,'  "^^^^  ^^^^^  ^"^  ^«'"^ive  Dreams  are  thefe  f 
And  how  Miferable  will  thofe  ere  long  be,  who  are  not  cwaked 
out  of  them  to  fee,  that  all  their  Happincfs  confift,  in  living  to 
OOD,  and  becoming  holy  as  he  is  holy  !  Oh,  may  you  never  fall 
into  the  TeTipers  and  Vanities,  the  Senfuality  and  Folly  of  the 
prefent  World.  You  arc,  by  divine  Providence,  left  as  it  were 
o/..;^  in  a  wide  World,  to  aft  for  your  felf  :  Be  fure  then  to 
remember,  'tis  a  World  of  Temptation.  You  have  no  earthly 
Parents  to  be  the  Means  of  forming  your  Youth  to  Piety  and 
Vertue,  by  their  pious  Examples, and  feafonablcCounfels  j  Let 
this  then  excite  you  with  greater  Diligence  and  Fervency  to 
look  up  to  the  Father  of  Mercies  for  Grace  andAfTiftancc  againft 
111  the  Vanities  of  the  World.  And  if  you  would  glorify  God, 
anfwer  his  juft  Expcftations  from  you,  and  make  your  own 
Soul  happy  m  this  and  the  coming  World,  obferve  thefe  few 
Direlitons  ;  tho'  not  from  a  Father,  yet  from  a  Brother  who 
is  loucbM  with  a  tender  Concern  for  your  prefent  and  future 
Happincfs.  And, 

TT^^^c  ^^^*^^^®  "P°"'  ^^^  ^^'^y  endeavour  to  praftife  a 
l.ife  of  Sertoufnefs  and  ftrid  Sobriety,  The  wife  Man  will  tell 
you  the  great  Advantage  of  fuch  a  Life,  Ecclef.  vii.  3.  Think  of 
thcLifc  of  Christ  ;  and  when  you  can  find  that /^^  was  pleas'd 
with  Jefting  and  vain  Merriment,  then  you  may  indulge  it  in 
your  fclf.  J  J  t3 

./^^/«  be  careful  to  make  a  good  Improvement  of  precious 
lime.  When  you  ceafe  from  Labour,  fill  up  your  Time  in 
Readmg,  Meditation,  &  Prayer  :  And  while  your  Hands  are  la- 
bouring^  let  your  Heart  be  employed,  as  much  as  poffible,  in 
divine  Thoughts.  ^ 

Further^  take  Heed  that  you  faithfully  perform  the  Bufsnefs 
you  have  to  do  in  the  World,  from  a  Regard  to  the  Commands 
of  UoD  }  and  not  from  an  ambitious  defirc  of  being  ef^eemed 
better  than  others.     Wefhould  always  logk  upoo  our  felves  as 

GOD'S 


of  Mr,  DaVid  Bralnerd.  ^5^ 

GOD'S  Servants,  placed  in  GOD's  World,  to  do  hU  Wcrk  ; 
and  accordingly  labour  faithfully  for  him  ;  not  with  a  DefuTn 
to  grow  rich  and  great,but  to  glorifyGOD,and  do  all  tbcGood 
we  poffiblycan. 

yfgain,  Never  expert  any  Satisfaction  or  Happinefs  from  ths 
IVorld.  If  you  hope  for  Happincfs  in  the  World,  hope  for  it 
from  God,  and  not  from  the  World.  Don't  think  you  (hall 
be  more  happy^  if  you  live  to  fuch  or  fuch  a  State  of  Life,  if 
you  live  to  be  for  your  felf,  to  be  fettled  in  the  World,  or  If 
you  (hould  gain  anEftate  in  It :  but  look  upon  it  that  you  fhall 
then  be  happy ^  when  you  can  be  conftantly  employed  forGOD, 
and  not  for  your  felf  ;  and  defire  to  Jive  in  this  World,  only 
to  do  and  fuffer  what  GOD  allots  to  you.  When  you  can  be 
of  the  Spint  and  Temper  oi  Angels ^  who  are  willing  to  come 
down  into  this  lower  World,  to  perform  what  God  commands 
them,  tho'  their  Defires  are  htaveniy^  and  not  in  theleaft  fet  on 
iarthly  Things,  then  you  will  be  of  that  Temper  that  you 
ought  to  have.  CoL  HI.  2. 

Once  more^  Never  think  that  you  can  live  to  GOD  by  your 
cwn  Power  or  Strength  ;  but  always  look  to,  and  rely  on  bim 
for  Affiftance,  yea,  for  all  Strength  and  Grace.  There  is  no 
greater  Truths  than  this,  That  we  can  do  nothing,  of  our  [elves  ; 
Job.  XV.  5.  and  2  Cor.  iii.  5.  Yet  nothing  but  our  own  Expe- 
rience can  effedlually  teach  it  to  us.  Indeed  we  arc  a  long 
Time  in  learning, that  <?// ourStrength  and  Salvation  is  inGOD. 
This  is  a  Life,  that  I  think  no  unconverted  Man  can  poffibly 
live  ;  and  yet  it  is  aLife  that  tw^ry  godly  Soul  is  prefUng  after^ 
in  fome  good  Meafure.  Let  it  then  be  your  great  Concern, thus 
to  devote  y«nr  felf  and  your  all  to  GOD. 

I  long  to  fee  you,  that  f  may  fay  much  more  to  you  than  I 
now  can,  for  your  Benefit  and  Welfare  ;  but  1  defire  to  com- 
mit you  to,  and  leave  you  with  the  Father  of  Alercies,  and 
God  of  all  Grace -y  praying  that  you  maybe  direded  fdfely 
thro'  an  evil  ^oridy  to  GOD's  heavenly  Kingdom. 
1  am  your  affe(5lionate  loving  Brother, 

David  Brainerd, 

No.  4.  To  a  fpecial    Friend. 

The  Forks  of  Delaware,  July  31.  1744. 

i— -/^Ertainly  thegreateft,  the  noble{t  Pleafure  of  intelligent 

^^^  Creatures  muft  refult  from  theirAcquaintance  wiihihe 

tlefTfd  GOD,  and  with  their  own  rational  and  immortalSouls. 

M  m  2  Aad 


i66  TheLlFE 

And  Oh,  how  divinely  fwcet  and  entertaining  is  it,  to  look  in- 
to our  own  Souls,  when  we  can  find  all  our  Powers  andPailions 
"united  and  engaged  in  Purfuit  after  GOD,  our  whole  Souls 
longing  and  paflionately  breathing  after  a  Conformity  to  him, 
and  the  fullEnjoymentof  him  !  Verily  there  are  no  Hours  pals 
away  with  fo  much  divine  Pleafure,  as  thofe  that  are  fpent  \a 
Communing  withGOD  and  our  ownHearts.  Oh,  how  fweeC 
is  a  Spirit  of  Devotion,  a  Spirit  of  Serioufnefs  and  divineSolem-^ 
nity,  a  Spirit  of  Gofpel-Simplicity,  Love,  Tenderncfs  I  Oh, 
how  defirablejand  how  profitable  to  the  Chriftian  Life, is  aSpi- 
rit  of  holyWatchfulnefsj&godlyJealoufy  over  ourfelves;  when 
our  Souls  are  afraid  of  nothing  fo  much  as  that  we  fhall  grieve 
and  offend  the  blefTcdGODjWhom  at  fuchTimeswe  apprehend, 
or  atieafl  hope,  to  be  a  Father  end  Friend ;  whom  we  then 
love  and  long  to  pleafe^  rather  than  to  be  happy  our  felves,  or  at 
Jeaft  we  delight  to  derive  our  Happinefs  from  pleafing  and  glo- 
rifying him  !  Surely  this  is  a  pious  Temper,  worthy  of  the 
higheft  Ambition  and  clofefl  Purfuit  of  intelligent  Creatures 
and  holy  Chriftians.  Oh,  how  vaftly  fuperiour  is  thePleafurc, 
Peace,  and  Satisfaction  derived  from  i\^t{Q  divine  Frames,  to 
that  which  we  (  alas  )  fometimes  purfuein  Things  impertinent 
and  trifling  I  Our  own  bitter  Experience  teaches  us,  that  in 
the  midd  of  fuch  Laughter  the  Heart  is  forrowful^  and  there  is 
no  trueSatisfadionbut  inGOD.  But, alas  I  How  fhall  we  ob- 
tain and  retain  this  fweet  Spirit  of  Religion  and  Devotion  ? 
Let  us  follow  the  Apoflle's  Dire6tion,  Phil.  ii.  12.  and  labour 
upon  the  Encouragement  he  there  mentions  ver.  13.  For 'tis 
GOD  only  can  afford  us  this  Favour;  and  he  will  ht  fought 
/^,  jind  *iis  fit  we  fhould  wait  upon  him  for  fo  rich  a  Mercy, 
Oh,  may  the  GOD  of  allGrace  afford  us  the  Grace  and  influ- 
ences ofh.is  divine  Spirit  ;  and  help  us  that  we  may  from  our 
Hearts  eflcem  it  our  greateft  Liberty  andHappinefs,  that  whe- 
iher  xve  live^  we  viav  live  to  the  LORD^  or  luhether  we  die,  w$ 
may  die  to  the  LORD  ;   that  in  Life  and  Death  we  may  beA/V. 

I  am  in  a  very  poor  State  of  Health  ;  I  think,  fcarce  ever 
poorer  :  But,  thro'  divine  Goodnefs  ;  I  am  not  difconiented 
under  my  Weaknefs,  and  Confinement  to  this  Wiidernefs  :  I 
blefs  GOD  for  this  Retirement :  I  never  was  more  thankful 
for  any  Thing,  than  i  have  been  of  late  for  theNeceflity  I  am 
under  of  Self  denial  in  many  Refpefls  ;  I  love  to  be  a  Pi/grim 
and  Stranger  in  this  Wiidernefs  :  It  fcems  moft  fit  for  fuch  a 
poor  ignorant,  v/orthlefs,  dcfpifed  Creature  as  I.  1  would  not 
|."han^c  my  prefent  Mi /lien  for  any  other  Bulinefs  in  the  whole 


p/  Mr.  David  Bralnerdj  267 

World.  I  may  tell  you  freely,  without  Vanity  and  Oftenta- 
tion,  GOD  has  of  late  given  me  great  Freedom  and  Fervency 
in  Prayer,  when  I  have  been  fo  weak  and  feeble,  my  Nature 
fecm'd  as  if  it  would  fpeedily  difTolve.  I  feel  as  if  my  all  was 
loft,  and  I  was  undone  for  this  World,  if  the  poor  Heathm 
mayn't  be  converted.  I  feel,  in  general,  different  from  whu- 
I  did,  when  I  faw  you  laft  ;  at  leaft  more  crucified  to  all  theEn- 
joyments  of  Life.  It  would  be  very  refreftiing  to  me,to  fee  you 
here  in  thisDefert ;  cfpecially  in  my  weak  difconfolate  Hours: 
But,  I  think,  I  could  be  content  never  to  fee  you,  or  any  of 
my  Friends  again  in  this  World,  if  GOD  would  blefs  my  La- 
bours here  to  the  Converfion  of  the  poor  Indians, 

I  have  much  that  1  could  willingly  communicate  to  you, 
which  I  muft  omit,  *till  Providence  gives  us  Leave  t®  fee  each 
other.     In  the  mean  Time,  I  reft 

Your  obliged  Friend  and  Servant, 

David  Br ai nerd. 

No.  5.  To  a  fpecial  Friend,  a  Minifter  of  the  Gofpel  in 
NeW'Jerfiy. 

The  Forks  of  D^/^a/^r^,  Decemb.  24.  1744. 

Rev.  and  dear  Brother, 
— T  Have  little  to  fay  to  you,  about  fpiritual  Joys^  and  thofe 
1  h\t^QARefreJhmenU^  &  divine  Con/olations,  with  which  I 
have  been  much  favaur^'d  inTimes  paft  :  But  this  I  can  tell  you, 
that  if  I  gainExpericnce  in  no  other  Point, yet  I  am  fure  I  do  in 
this,  viz.  That  ihtprefent  Wofld  has  nothing  in  it  to  Jatiify  an 
immortal  Soul  ;  and  hence, that  it  is  not  to  be  defired  for  it  felf^ 
but  only  becaufe  GOD  may  he  feen  &  fervedm  it  :  And  I  wifh 
I  could  be  more  patient  h  willing  to  live  in  it  ior  thiiEnd^xh^^n 
I  can  ufually  find  my  felf  to  be.  'Tis  no  Vertue,  I  know,  to 
defire  Death,  only  to  be  freed  from  the  Miferies  of  Life  :  But 
I  want  that  divine  HOPE,  which  you  obferved,  when  I  faw  you 
laft,  was  the  very  Sinnews  of  vital  Religion.  Earth  can  do  us 
no  Good,  and  if  there  be  no  HOPE  of  our  doing  Good  onEarth^ 
how  can  we  defire  to  live  in  it  I  And  yet  we  ought  to  defire, or 
at  leaft  to  berefignM,  to  tarry  in  it;  becaufe  'tis  the  Will  of 
our  alwife  Sovereign.  But  perhaps  thefe  Thoughts  will  appear 
melancholy  and  gloomy,  and  confequentiy  will  be  very  unde- 
firable  to  you  ;  and  therefore  I  forbear  to  add.  I  wifh,  you 
mayn't  read  them  in  the  fame  Circumftances  in  which  £  write 
tijem.  I  have  a  little  more  to  dc  and  f'^ffer  in  a  dark  difconfolate 

World  5 


i6g  rfo  L  I  F  E 

World  ;  and  then  I  hope  to  be  as  happy  as  you  are.  >.m.  ■  ■  I 
ihould  aft  you  to  pray  for  me,  were  I  worth  your  Concern. 
May  the  Lord  enable  us  both  to  tndure  Hardnefs  as  good  Soldiers 
#^  Jesus  Christ  ;  and  may  we  obtain  Merc^  of  God  to  bi 
faithful^  to  theDeathy  in  the  Difcharge  of  our  refpedliveTrufts. 
I  am  your  very  unworthy  Brother, 

and  humble  Servant, 

Dav*  Brainerd* 

No.  6.  To  his  Brother  Jthrty  at  College. 

Crofvutekfungy  in  NeW'Jer[ey^  Decem.  a8.  174s* 

Very  dear  Brother, 

* T  Am  in  one  continued,   perpetual,   and  uninterrupted 

-*-  Hurry  ;  and  divine  Providence  throws  fo  much  upon 
me,that  I  don't  fee  it  will  ever  beotherwife.  May  I  obtainMercy 
#/GOD  to  bi  faithful ^io  the  Death.  I  can*t  fay, I  am  weary  of 
my  Hurry  5  I  only  want  Strength  and  Grace  to  do  more  for 
GOD,  than  I  have  everyetdone. 

My  dear  Brother,  'I'he  LORD  of  Heaven^  that  has  carried 
me  thro'  many  Trials,  hleji  you  y  blefs  you  for  Time,  andEter- 
nity;  and  fit  you  to  do  Service  for  him  in  his  Church  below, 
and  to  enjoy  his  blifsfulPrefence  in  hisChurch  triumphant.  My 
Brother,  the  Time  is  Jhort  :  Oh,  let  us  fill  it  up  for  GOD:  Let 
us  count  the  Suferiv.gi  of  this  prefent  Time  as  nothing,  if  we  can 
but  run  our  Race^  and  finijh  our  Courfe  with  Joy.  Oh,  let  us 
ftrive  to  live  to  GOD.  I  blefs  the  Lord,  I  have  nothing  to  do 
with  Earthy  but  only  to  labour  honeftly  in  it  for  GOD,  'till  I 
fhall  accomplifh  as  an  Hireling  my  Day.  1  think,  1  don'c  deft  re 
to  live  one  Minute  for  any  Thing  that  Earth  can  afford.  Oh, 
that  1  could  live  for  none  but  GOD,  'till  mv  dying  Moment. 
1  am  your  afFecStionate  Brother, 

D.  Brainerd. 

No.  7.  To  his  Brother  7/rj//,  then  a  Student  at  Yale-Collegi 
in  New- Haven. 

EliJabeth'Toivn^'New-Jerfey.'^ow.  24.  1746. 

Dear  Brother, 

I  Had  determined  to  make  you  and  my  other  Friends  in  iV/w- 
EngIandzV\{n,  this  Fall ;  partly  from  an  earnelt  Defircl 
had  to  fee  you  and  them,  and  partly  with  a  View  to  the  Reco- 
very of  my  Health;  which  has,  for  more  than  three  Months 
paft,  been  much  imoair'd.  And  in  Order  to  profecule  this  De- 

H^3 


ef  Mr.  David  Brainerd.'  269 

fign,  I  fct  out  from  my  own  People  about  three  Weeks  ago, 
and  came  as  far  as  to  this  Place ;  where,  my  Diforder  greatly 
increafmg,  I  have  been  obliged  to  keep  Houfe  ever  fmce, until 
the  Day  before  Yefterday  ;  at  which  Time,  I  was  able  to  ride 
about  half  a  Mile,  but  found  my  felf  much  tired  with  the  Jour- 
ney. I  have  now  no  Hopes  of  profecuting  my  Journey  into 
N.  £«^/ri«df  this  Winter,  fuppofing  my  prefent  State  of  Health 
will  by  no  Means  admit  of  it :  Altho'  f  am  thro'  divine  Good- 
nefs  much  better  than  I  was  fomeDays  ago,  yetl  han'tStrength 
now  to  ride  more  than  ten  Miles  a  Day,  if  the  Seafon  were 
warm,&  fit  for  me  to  travel  in.  My  Diforder  has  been  attended 
with  feveral  Symptoms  of  a  Confumption  ;  and  I  have  been  at 
Times  apprehenfive,  that  my  great  Changt  was  at  Hand  :  Yet 
blefled  be  GOD,  I  have  never  been  affrighied  \  but  on  the 
contrary,  at  fome  Times  much  delighted  with  a  View  of  it's 
Approach.  Oh,  the  Bleflednefs  of  being  delivered  from  the 
Clogs  of  Flefh  and  Senfe,  from  a  Body  of  Sin  and  fpiritual 
Death  f  Oh,  the  unfpeakable  Sweetnefs  of  being  tranflated  in- 
to a  State  of  compleat  Purity  and  Perfe6lion  !  Believe  me,  my 
Brother,  a  lively  View  and  Hope  of  thefeThings  will  make  the 
King  cf  -ferron  himfelf  appear  agreable.  — Dear  Brother, 
let  me  inrreat  you,  to  keep  Eternity  in  your  View,  and  behave 
your  felf  as  becomes  one  that  muft  fhortly  give  on  Account  of  all 
Things  done  in  the  Body,  That  GOD  may  be  your  GOD,  and 
prepare  you  for  his  Service  here,  and  his  Kingdom  of  Glory 
hereafter,     is  the  Defire    and  daily  Prayer  of 

Your  afFe(Stionate  loving  Brother, 

D.  Brainerd. 

No.  8.  To  his  Brother  Jfrael^  at  College  ;  written  in  the 
Time  of  his  extreme  Illncfs  in  Bojion^  a  few  Month  before  his 
Death. 

Bofton^  June  30.  1747.  ^ 
My  dear  Brother, 
JT  is  Jrom  the  fides  of  Eternity  \  now  addrefs  you.  I  am  hcar- 
*  tily  forry,  that  I  have  fo  little  Strength  to  write  what  1  long 
^o  much  to  communicate  to  you.  But  let  me  tell  you,  my  Bro- 
ther, Eternity  is  another  Thing  than  we  ordinarily  take  it  to  be 
in  a  healthful  State.  Oh,  how  vaft  and  boundlefs  !  Oh,  how 
fix'd  and  unalterable  !  Oh,  of  what  infinite  Importance  is  it, 
that  we  be  prepared  for  Eternity  !  I  have  been  juft  a  dying, 
no-.v  for  more  than  a  Week  ;  and  all  around  me  have  thought 
me  {q  :  But  in  this  Time  I  have  had  clear  Views  of  Eternity  ; 

have 


'27©  y^f  L I F  E 

have  feen  the  Bleflednefs  of  the  Godly,  in  fome  Meafure  ;  ani 
have  long'd  to  (hare  their  happy  State  ;  as  well  as  been  com- 
fortably  faiisiied*  that  through  Grace,  I  fhall  do  fo  :  But  Oh, 
what  Anguifti  is  raifed  in  my  Mind,  to  think  of  an  Eternity  for 
thofe  who  are  Chri/ilefs,  for  thofe  who  are  miftaken,  and  who 
bring  their  fa) fe  Hopes  to  the  Grave  with  them  !  The  Sight 
was  fo  dreadful,  1  could  by  no  Means  bear  it  :  My  Thoughts 
recoiled, and  1  faid  (  but  under  a  more  afFe^^ing  Senfe  than  ever 
before  )  fVho  can  dwitl  with  evtrlafting  Burnings  f  Oh,  me- 
thought,  that  1  could  now  fee  my  Friends,  that  I  might  warn 
them,  to  fee  to  it,  they  lay  their  Foundation  for  Eternity  furc. 
And  you,  my  dear  Brother,  I  have  been  particularly  concerned 
for  ;  and  have  wondered,  I  fo  much  negledtcd  converfmg  with 
you  about  your  fpiritual  State  at  our  laftMceting.  Oh,myBro- 
ther,lel  me  then  befeech  you  now  to  examine, whether  you  are 
indeed  2i  new CreatureP  Whether  you  have  ever  a6tedabovc5^//? 
Whether  the  Gkry  of  God  has  ever  been  the  fweeteft  higheft 
Concern  with  you  ?  Whether  you  have  ever  been  reconciled 
to  all  the  Perfediions  of  God  j  in  a  Word,  whether  God  has 
been  your  Portion,  and  a  holy  Conformity  to  him  your  chief 
Delight  ?  If  you  can't  anfwer  pofitivelyjConfider  ferioufly  the 
frequent  Breathings  ofyourSoul :  But  don't  however  put  your 
felf  off  with  a  flight  Anfwer.  If  you  have  Reafon  to  think  you 
are  GraceJe/s,  Oh  give  your  felf  and  the  Throne  of  Grace  no 
Reft,  'tillGoD  arife  and  fave.  But  if  the  Cafe  (hould  be  other- 
wife,  blefs  GcD  for  his  Grace,  and  prefs  after  Holinefs.  * 

My  Soul  longs,  that  you  fhould  befitted  for,  and  in  dueTime 
go  into  theWoik  of  the  Miniftry,  I  can't  bear  to  think  of  your 
going  into  any  other  Bufmefs  in  Life.  Don't  be  difcouraged, 
becaufe  you  fee  your  elderBrothers  in  theMiniftry  die  early ^qw^ 
after  another  :  I  declare,  now  I  am  dying,  I  would  not  have 
fpcnt  my  Life  othtrwife  for  the  whole  World.  But  I  muft  leave 
this  \^gftyjQD. 

If  CT^^ine  fhould  come  to  your  Hands  foon  after  the  Date, 
1  fhould  be  almolt  defirous  you  Ihould  fct  out  on  a  Journey  to 
ine  :  It  may  be,  you  may  fee  me  alive  ;  which  I  fhould  much 
lejoyce  in.  But  if  you  can't  comc»  I  muft  commit  you  to  the 
Grace  of  GeD,  where  you  are.  May  he  be  your  Guide  and 
Counfeller,  your  Sanilifier  and  eternal  Portion. 


♦  Mr.  5rtf/W</ afterwards  had  greater  SatisfaQion  concern- 
ing the  State  of  his  Brother's  Soul,  by  much  Opportunity 
of  Converfation  with  him  before  hi§  Death,  Ob, 


(?/ A/r.  David  Brainerd.  271 

Oh,  my  dear  Brother,  fleeflefhly  Luftsy  and  the  inchanting 
Amufementiy  as  well  a^  corrupt  Do£irims  of  the  prel'ent  Day  j 
and  ftrive  to  live  to  GOD. 

Take  this  as  the  la/i  Line  from 

Your  affectionate  dying  Brother, 

D,  Broinerd. 

No.  g.  To  a  young  Gentleman,  z  Candidate  for  the  Work 
of  the  Mini/iry^  for  whom  he  had  a  fpecia]  Friendfhip ;  alfo 
written  at  the  fame  Time  of  his  great  Illnefs  and  nearaefs  to 
Death  in  Bofton, 

Very  dear  Sir, 

HOw  amazing  'tis,  that  the  Living,  who  know  they 
mu/i  die,  fhould  notwithftanding  put  (ar  away  the  evil 
Day,  in  a  Seafon  of  Health  and  Profperity  ;  and  live  at  fuch  an 
awful  Diftance  from  a  Familiarity  with  the  Grave,  and  the 
great  Concerns  beyond  it  I  And  efpecially  it  may  juftly  fill  us 
with  Surprize,  that  any  whofeMinds  have  been  divinely  enlight" 
ned^  to  behold  the  importait  Things  of  Eternity  as  they  are, 
1  fay,  that  fuch  (hould  live  in  this  Manner.  And  yet  Sirjhow 
frequently  is  this  the  Cafe  ?  How  rare  are  the  Inftances  of 
thofe  who  live  and  a£t,  from  Day  to  Day,  as  on  the  Verge  of 
Eternity  ;  ftriving  to  fill  up  all  their  remaining  Moments, 
in  the  Service,  and  to  the  Honour  of  their  great  Mafter  f  We 
infenfibly  trifle  away  Time,  while  we  feem  to  have  enough  of 
it;  and  are  fo  f^rangely  amufcd,  as  in  a  great  Meafure  to  lofe  a 
Senfeof  the  Hoiinef:  &nd  blefl'ed  Qualifications  necefTary  to 
prepare  us  to  be  Inhabitants  of  the  heavenly  Paradi/e.  But 
Oh,  dear  Sir,  a  dying  Bed^  if  we  enjoy  our  Reafon  clearly,  will 
give  another  View  of  Things.  I  have  now,  for  more  than 
ihree  Weeks,  lain  under  the  greateftDegree  of  Weaknefs  ;  the 
greater  Part  of  the  Time,  expe6ting  daily  and  hourly  to  enter 
into  the  eternal  World  :  fometimes  have  been  fo  far  gone,  as 
to  be  wholly  ^peechlefs,  for  fome  Hours  together.  And  Oh, 
of  what  vaft  Importance  has  a  holy  fpiritual  Life  appeared  to  ms 
to  be  in  this  Seafon  I  I  have  longed  to  call  upon  all  my  Friends, 
to  make  it  their  Bufmefs  to  live  to  GOD  ;  and  efpecially  all 
that  are  deftgned  for,  or  engaged  in  the  Service  of  iheSan£fuary^ 
O  dear  Sir,  don't  think  it  cnoug,h,to  live  at  theRatc  of  iommon 
Chri/lians,  Alas,  to  how  little  Purpofe  do  they  often  converfe^ 
when  they  meet  together  I  The  Vifits,  even  of  ihofe  who  are 
called  Chriftians  indeed,  are  frequently  extreme  barren :   And 

N  n  Confcience 


5;a  r^^  LIFE 

Ccnfcicnce  can't  but  condemn  us  for  the  Mifimprovcment 
of  Time,  while  we  have  been  conveifant  with  them.  But  the 
Way  to  enjoy  the  divine  Prefencc,and  be  fitted  for  diflinguilh- 
ingService  forGOD,is  to  live  aLifc  oi  gnatDtvoiion  &  con/iant 
Silf- Dedication  to  him  ;  obferving  the  Motions  and  Difpofiti- 
ons  of  our  own  Hearts,  whence  we  may  learn  the  Corruptions 
that  lodge  there,  and  our  conftant  Need  of  Help  from  GOD 
Jor  the  Performance  of  the  leaft  Duty.  And  Oh,  dear  Sir,  let 
me  befeech  you  frequently  to  attend  the  great  and  preciousDu- 
ties  oi  fecret  Fajiing  and  Praytr, 

I  have  a  fecret  Thought, from  feme  Things  I  have  obferved, 
that  GOD  may  perhaps  defign  you  for  feme  fingular  Service  in 
the  World.  Oh  then  labour  to  be  prepared  and  qualified  to 
do  much  for  GOD.  Read  Mr.  Edwards*s  Piece  on  the  Jf- 
fe£fions,  again  and  again  i  and  labour  to  diflinguijh  clearly  upon 
Experiences  &AfFe61ionsinReligion, that  you  may  make  aDiiFe- 
rence  between  theG^/^&  thefhiningDr^/i  ;  I  fay, labour  here, as 
ever  you  would  be  an  ufeful  Mintjitr  of  Chrift :  For  nothing 
has  put  fuch  a  Stop  to  the  Work  of  GOD  in  the  late  Day  as 
the  falfe  Religion,  the  wild  Affe6tions, that  attended  it.  SufFcr 
me  therefore,  finally,  to  intreat  you  earneflly  to^/v^  ^^oar/^// 
to  Prayer,  to  Reading  and  Meditation  on  divineTruths :  Strive 
to  penetrate  to  the  Bottom  of  them,  and  never  be  content  with 
a  fuperficial  Knowledge.  By  this  Means,  yourThoughts  will 
gradually  grow  weighty  and  judicious  ;  and  you  hereby  will  be 
polTeffed  ofa  valuable  Treafure^  out  of  which  you  may  produce 
Thingi  new  and  old,  to  the  Glory  of  GOD. 

And  now  J  commend  you  to  the  Grace  of  GOD  ;  earneflly 
dcfiring,  that  a  plentiful  Portion  of  the  divine  Spirii  may  reft 
upon  you;  that  you  may  /iV(? /^  GOD  in  every  Capacity  of 
Life,  and  do  abundant  Service  for  him  in  2ipuhlick,  if  it  be  his 
Will  ;  and  that  you  may  be  richly  qualified  for  the  Inheritance 
of  the  Saints  in  Light. 

i  fcarce  exped  to  fee  your  Face  anymore  In  the  Body; 
and  therefore  intreat  you  to  accept  this  as  the  laft  Token  of 
Love,  from 

Your  fincerely  afTedlionate  dying  Friend, 

David  Brainerd* 

P.  S,  I  am  now,  at  the  dating  of  this  Letter,   ccnfiderablj^ 
recc.vered  from  wt^  I  was  when  I  wrote  it  ;  it  having  laia 
me  (onie  Time,  for  want  of  an  Opportunity  cf  Conveyance  , 

it 


of  Mr.  David  Brainerd.  273 

it  was  written  in  Bojlon, I  am  now  able  to  ride  a  little, 

and  foam  removed  into  the  Country:  But  I  have  no  more 
Expectation  of  recovering,  than  when  I  wrote,  tho*  I  am  a 
little  better  for  the  prcfent ;  and  therefore  I  ftiil  fubfcribe  my 
felf.  Your  dying  Friend,  &c. 

D.  B. 

No.  10.  To  hi8  Brother  John,  at  Bethgly  the  Town  of 
Chriftian  Indians  in  N^w-Jer/dy  ;  written  likewife  at  Bo/ion, 
when  he  was  there  on  the  Brink  of  the  Grave,  in  the  Summer 
before  his  Death. 

Dear  Brother, 

I  Am  now  juft  on  the  Verge  of  Eternity,  cxpe£ling  very 
fpeedily  to  appear  in  the  unfeen  World.  1  feel  my  felf 
no  more  an  Inhabitant  of  EarthyZnd  fometimes  earneftly  long 
to  depart  and  be  with  Chrijl,  I  blefs  God, he  has  for  feme  Tears 
given  me  an  abiding  Convi£lion,  that  it  is  impoflible  for  any 
rationalCreature  to  enjoy  ixMQ Happinefs  without  being  entirely 
devoted  to  Him,  Under  the  Influence  of  this  Convidion  I  have 
in  fome  Meafure  adled  :  Oh  that  I  had  done  more  fo  !  I  faw 
both  the  Excellency  &  Neceflity  o{  Holinejs  in  Life  ;  but  never 
in  fuch  a  Manner  as  now, when  I  am  jufl  brought  to  the  Sides 
of  the  Grave.  Oh,  my  Brother,  purfue  after  HoUneJs ;  prefs 
towards  this  blefled  Mark  ;  and  let  your  thirfty  Soul  continu- 
ally fay,  7  y2)j//  never  be  Satisfied  *  till  1  awake  in  thy  Likenefs, 
Altho*  there  has  been  a  great  deal  of  Selfijhnefs  in  my  Views  ; 
of  which  I  am  afhamed,  and  for  which  my  Soul  is  humbled  at 
every  View  :  Yet,  blefied  be  God,  I  find  I  have  really  had, 
for  the  moft  part,  fuch  a  Concern  for  his  Glory,  and  the  Ad- 
vancement of  his  Kingdom  in  the  World,  that  it  is  a  Satisfadtion 
to  me  to  refledt  upon  thefe  Tears, 

And  now,  my  dear  Brother,  as  I  mufl  prefs  you  to  purfue 
^Uqx  perfcnal  Holinefs,  to  be  as  much  in  Fafling  and  Prayer  as 
your  Health  wi!l  allow,  and  to  live  above  the  Rate  of  common 
Chri/Iians  ;  fo  I  muft  inireat  you  folemnly  to  attend  to  your 
publick  Work  :  Labour  to  diftinguifh  between /r«^  and  fa  If e 
Religion  :  And  to  that  End,  watch  the  Motions  of  God's 
Spirit  upon  your  own  Heart  ;  look  to  him  for  Help  ;  and  im- 
partially compare  your  Experiences  with  his  fVord.  Read  Mr. 
Edwards  on  the  Jffe£fions,  where  the  EfTencc  and  Soul  of  Re- 

N  n  2  ligion 


274  ^^*  LIFE 

ligion  is  clearly  diftinguifh'd  from  falfe  Affe6lions.  *  Value 
i-eligious  Joyi  according  to  the  Suhje^- Matter  oi  them:  There 
are  many  thatrejoycein  their  {\ippc4ed yu^ijjcathn;  but  what  do 
thefejoys  argue,but  only  that  they  love  them/elves  P  VVhereas,in 
;fr«^  rpiritual  Jeys,  the  Soul  rejoyces  in  God  for  what  he  is  in 
himfelf  \  blcffes  God  for  his  Holinefs,  Sovereignty,- Power, 
Faiihfulnefs,  and  all  his  Perfections  j  adores  God,  that  he  is 
what  he  is,  that  he  is  unchangeably  pofTefs'd  of  infinite  Glory 
and  Happinefs.  Now,  when  Men  thus  rejoyce  in  the  Perfec- 
iionsofGod,  and  in  the  infinite  Excellency  of  the  fFay  of  Sal- 
vation hy  Chriji^  and  in  the  holy  Commands  of  God,  which  are 
a  Tranfcript  of  his  holy  Nature,  thefe  Joys  are  divine  and  fpi- 
ritual.  Our  Joys  will  ftand  by  us  at  the  Hour  of  Death^  if  we 
can  be  then  fatisfied,   that  we  have  thus  aded  SLhowe/el/^  and 

*  I  had  at  firft  fully  intended,  in  publifhing  this  and  the 
foregoingLetters,to  have  fupprefs'd  thefePafTages  wherein 
my  Name  is  mentioned,  and  my  Difcourfe  on  religious  Af- 
feSiians  recommended  :  And  am  fenfiblcjthat  by  my  doing 
othervvife,  I  (hall  bring  upon  me  the  Reproach  of  fome. 
But  how  much  foeverlmay  be  pleafed  with  theCommen- 
dation  of  any  Performance  of  mine  (  and  I  confefs,  I 
efteem  the  Judgment  and  Approbation  of  fuch  a  Perfon  as 
Mr.  Brainerd,  worthy  to  be  valued,  and  look  on  my  felf 
as  highly  honoured  by  it  )  Yet  I  can  truly  fay,  theThings 
that  governed  me  in  altering  my  foremention'd  Determi- 
nation, with  Rerpe(5l  to  thefe  PafTages,  were  thefe  two- 
(i.)  What  Mr. Brainetdheie  fays  of  that  Difcouife,  fhews 
very  fully  and  particularly  what  his  Notions  were  of  ex- 
perimental Religion,  and  the  Nature  of  true  Piety,  and 
how  far  he  was  from  placing  it  in  Impreifions  on  the  Ima- 
gination, or  any  enthufiaftical  Impulfes,  and  how  cflential 
in  Religion  he  cffeem'd  holy  Practice,  &'c.  &'c.  For  all 
that  have  read  that  Difcourfe,  know  what  Sentiments  are 
there  exprefs'd  concerning  thefe  Things.  (  2.  )  I  judged, 
that  the  /Approbation  of  (o  apparent  and  eminent  a  Priend 
and  Example  of  inward  vital  Religion,  and  evangelical 
JPiety  in  the  Height  of  it,  would  probably  tend  to  raaktj 
%huBook  more  Serviceable  ;  efpecially  among  fome  Kinds 
of  zealogis  Perfons,  whofe  Benefit  was  efpecially  aim*d 
at  in  the  Book.;  fome  of  which  are  prejudiced  againf^ 
|t,  as  written  in  too  legal  a  Strain,  and  oppofing  fome 
Things  wherein  the  Height  of  Chriflian  Experience  con- 
fjfts^  and  tending  to  build  Men  up  on  their  own  Works. 

1,1 


of  Mr.  David  Brainerd.  275 

in  a  difinterefted  Manner  (  if  I  may  fo  exprefs  it )  rejoyced  in 

the  Ghry  ot  the  blefled  God. 1  fear,  you  are   not  fuf- 

ficiently  aware  how  much  faffe  Religion  there  is  in  the  World  : 
Many  ferious  Chriftians  and  vafuabie  Minifters  arc  too  eafily 
impofcdupon  bv  thisfalfe£»/tfz^.  I  likewife  /ear, you  are  not  fen- 
fible  of  the  dreadful  EfTeSfi  &  Conjequences  or  this  falfeReligion. 
Let  me  tell  you,*tis  iht  Devii  transformed  into  an  Angel  of  Light  ; 
*ns  a  Brat  of  Hell,  that  always  fprings  up  with  every  Revival  of 
Religion,  andftabs  and  murders  the  Caufe  of  God,  while  it 
pafles  Current  with  Multitudes  of  well-meaning  People  for 
the  Height  of  Religion.  Set  yourfelf,  my  Brother,  (o  crufh  all 
Appearances  of  this  Nature,  among  the  Indians^  and  never  en- 
courage any  Degrees  of  Heat  without  Light.  Charge  my  Peo- 
ple in  the  Name  of  their  dying  Minifier^  yea,  in  the  Name  of 
Him  ivhowas  dead  and  is  aiive,to  live  and  walk  as  becomes  the 
Gofpel.  Tell  them,  how  great  the  Expectations  of  God  and 
his  People  are  from  them,  and  how  awfully  they  v/ill  wound 
God's  Caufe, if  they  fall  into  Vice  ;  as  well  as  fatally  prejudice 
other  poor  Indians.  Always  infift,  that  (heir  Experiences  are 
rottenj  that  their  Joys  are  deluftve,  altho*  they  may  have  been 
rapt  up  into  the  third  Heavens  in  their  own  Conceit  by  them, 
unlefs  the  main  Tenour  of  their  Lives  be  fpiritual,  watchful, 
and  holy.  In  preffing  thefeThings,  Thou  Jhalt  both  fave  thy  f elf ^ 
and  thofe  that  hear  thee  ?  . 

GOD  knows, I  was  heartily  willing  tohaveferved  him  longer 
in  the  Work  of  the  Minifiry,  altho*  it  had  ftill  been  attended 
with  all  iht  Labours  and  Hardjhips  of  paft  Years,  if  he  had  feen 
fit  that  it  jQiould  be  fo  :  but  as  his  Will  now  appears  otherwife, 
I  am  fully  content, and  can  with  utmoflFreedcm  fay.  The  f^Vill 
of  the  Lord  he  done.  It  afFeds  me,  to  think  of  leaving  you  in  a 
V/orldofSin:  My  Heart  pities  you,  tha^  thofe  Storms  and 
Tempefts  are  yet  before  you,  which,  I  truft,  through  Grace  I 
am  almoft  delivered  from.  But  God  lives,  andb'iejfed  he  myRock  : 
He  is  the  fame  almighty  Friend  ;  and  will, I  truft,be  yourGuide 
and  Helper,  as  he  has  been  mine. 

And  now,  my  dear  Brother,  /  commend  you  to  God  and  to 
the  Word  of  His  Grace ^which  is  able  to  build  you  upy  and  give  you 
Inheritance  among  all  th^m  that  are  Janiiified.  May  you  enjoy  the 
divinePfefence,bath  in  private  and  publick  ;  and  may  theArms 
of  your  Hands  be  madejirong,  by  the  right  Hand  of  the  mighty  God 
p/ Jacob.  Which  are  the  paffionate  Defires  and  Prayers  of 
Your  affedlionate,  dying  B/other, 

David  drainer d. 
APPENDIX. 


1^6  Reflexions  d»i  Obfcrvations 

A  N 

APPENDIX. 

Containing  fome  REFLECTIONS  and 
.     OBSERVATIONS  on  the  preceeding 
Memoirs  of  Mr.  Brain erd. 

I.   \T7  E  have  here  Opportunity,   as  I  apprehend,  in  a  very 

VV     lively  Injlance^  to  fee  the  Nature  of  true  Religion  ; 

and  the  Manner  of  it's  Operation^   when  exemplified 

in  2  high  Degree   znd  powerful  Exetcife.     Particularly  it   may 

be  worthy  to  be  obferved  : 

I.  How  greatly  Mr.  Brainerd's  Religion  differed  from  that 
of  fome  Pretenders  to  the  Experience  of  a  clear  IVork  of  favirg 
Converfion  wro't  on  their  Hearts  ;  who  depending   and  living 
on  that, fettle  in  a  cold^carelefs  &  carnal  Frame  of  Mind,andina 
Negled  of  thorough,  earned  Religion,   in  the  ftated  Practice 
of  it.     Altho*  his  Convictions  and  Converfion  were  in  allRef- 
pe6ls  exceeding  clear,  and  very  remarkable  ;    yet  how  far  was 
he  from  adling  as  tho'  he  thought  he  had  got  through  his  Work^ 
when  once  he  had  obtained    Comfort,    and  Satisfaction  of  his 
Jntereft  in  Chrift,    and    Title  to   Heaven.    On  the   contrary, 
thatVVork  on  his  Heart,  by  which  he  was  brought  to  this,  was 
with  him  evidently   but  the    Beginning  of  hii  fVork,   his   firft 
cntring  on  the  great    Bufinefs  of   Religion  and  the  Service  of 
GOD,  his  firft  fetting  out  in  his  Race.     His  obtaining  Reft  of 
Soul  inChrift,  after  earneft  ftriving  to  enter  in  at  the  ftraitGate, 
and  being  violent  to  take  the  Kingdom  of  Heaven,  he  did  not 
look  upon  as  putting  an  End  to  any  further  Occafion  for  ftriv- 
ing  and  Violence  in  Religion  ;   but  thefe  were  continued  ftill, 
and  maintained  conftantly,  through  all  Changes,    to  the  very 
End  uf  Life.     His  Work  was  not  fini{hed,nor  hisRace  ended, 
'tiilLifewas  ended;agreeable  to  fieq^icniScripture-  Reprefentations 
of  the  Chriftian  Life.     He  continued    prefTing  forward    in   a 
conftant  Manner,  forgetting  the  Things  that  were  behind, and 
reaching  fi)rth  towards  the  Things  that  were  before.   HisPains 
and  Euneftnefs  in  the  Bufinefs  o(  Religion  were  rather  increaf- 

ed. 


Oft  the  prececdirjg  Memoirs.  277 

ed,  than  diminifhed,  after  he  had  received  Comfort  and  Satis- 
fa^ion  concerning  the  fafety  of  his  State.  Thofe  divinePrin- 
ciples,  which  after  this  he  was  aduated  by,  of  Love  to  GOD, 
and  Longings  and  Thirftings  after  Holinefs,  feem  to  be  more 
efFedlual  to  engage  him  to  Fains  and  Adlivity  in  Religion,than 
Fear  of  Hell  had  been  before. 

And  as  his  Converfion  was  not  the  End  of  his  fVorky  or  of 
the  Courfe  of  his  Dihgence  and  Strivings  in  Religion  ;  fo  nei- 
ther was  it  the  End  of  the  Work  of  the  Spirit  of  GOD  on  his 
Heart :  But  on  the  contrary,  the  Beginning  of  that  Work  ; 
the  Beginning  of  his  fpiritual  Difcoveries,and  holy  Views  ;  the 
firftDawning  of  theLight, which  thenceforward  increafed  more 
and  more  ;  the  Beginning  of  his  holyAfFe£lions,  hisSorrow  for 
Sin,  his  Love  to  GOD,  his  Rejoycing  in  Chrift  Jefus,  his 
Longings  after  Holinefs.  And  the  powerful  Operations  of  the 
Spirit  ot  God  in  thefe  Things,  were  carried  on,  from  the  Day 
of  his  Converfion,  in  a  continued  Courfe,  to  his  dying  Day. 
His  religious  Experiences,  his  Admiration,  his  Joy  and  Praife, 
and  flowing  AfFe(Slions,  did  not  only  hold  up  to  a  confi'^erable 
Height  for  a  few  Days,  Weeks  or  Months,  at  firft,  whileHope 
and  Comfort  were  new  Things  with  him  ;  and  then  gradually 
dwindle  and  die  away,  'till  they  came  to  almolt  nothing,  and 
fo  leave  him  without  any  fenfible  or  remarkable  Experience  of 
fpiritual  Difcoveries,  or  holy  and  divine  AfFe6tions,  forMonths 
together  ;  as  it  is  with  many, who  afttr  theNewnefs  of  Things 
is  over,  fooncome  to  that  pafs,  that  it  is  again  with  'em  very 
much  as  it  is  ufed  to  be  before  their  fuppofedConverfion,  with 
Refped  to  any  prefcntViews  of  GOD'sGlory,of  Chrift'sExcei- 
lency,  or  of  the  Beauty  of  divine  Things ;  and  with  Refpeft  to 
any  prefent  Thirftings  for  GOD,  or  ardcntOut-goings  of  their 
Souls  after  divine  Objcds  ;  But  only  now  and  then  they  have 
a  comfortableRefledion  onThings  they  have  met  with  inTimes 
patt,  and  are  fomething  affeded  with  them  ;  and  fo  reft  eafy, 
thinking  allThings  are  well  ;  they  have  had  a  good  ckarWork, 
and  their  State  is  fafe,  and  they  doubt  not  but  they  fhal!  go  to 
Heaven  when  they  die.  How  far  otherwife  was  it  wi\h  Mr. 
Srainerd,  than  it  is  with  fuch  Perfons  !  His  Experiences,  in- 
ftead  of  dying  away,  were  evidently  of  an  increafmg  Nature. 
His  firft  Love  and  ether  holy  Afte<Sions,even  at  the  Begitinii;g 
were  very  great  ;  but  after  Months  and  Years,  became  much 
greater,  and  more  remarkable  ;  and  the  Spiritual  Exercifes  of 
his  Mind  continued  exceeding  great  (tho'  not  equally  fo  at  all 
Tin:e5;yet  ufually  fo}  without  indulged  Remifncfs  and  without 

habitual 


278  Refledlions  and  Obfcrvations 

habitual  dwindling  &  dying  away, even  'till  hisDe(;eafe.  They 
began  in  a  Time  of  generalDeadnefs  all  over  theLand,and  were 
greatly  irjcreafed  in  a  Time  of  general  Reviving  of  Religion. 
And  when  i<eligion  decayed  again,  and  a  general  Deadnefs 
returned,  his  Experiences  were  ftill  kept  up  in  their  Height, 
and  his  holy  Exercifes  maintained  in  their  Life  and  Vigour  ; 
and  fo  continued  to  be,  in  a  general  CourfejWherever  he  was, 
and  whatever  his  Circumftances  were,  among  Engltjh  and  In- 
diam^  in  Company  and  alone,  in  Towns  and  Cities  and  in  the 
howliagWildernefSjin  Sicknefs  and  inHeaith,  living  and  dying. 
This  is  agreable  toScripture-Defcriptions  of  true  and  rightRe- 
Jiglon,  and  of  theChriftianLife.  TheChange,  that  was  wrought 
in  him  at  his  Converfion,  was  agreable  to  Sctipture-Reprefen- 
tations  of  that  Change  which  is  wrought  in  true  Converfion  ; 
a  great  Change,  and  an  abiding  Change,  rendring  him  a  new 
Man,  a  new  Creature  :  Not  only  a  Change  as  to  Hope  and 
Comfort,  and  an  Apprehenfion  of  his  own  good  Eftare  ;  and  a 
tranfientChange,conriflinginhighFlights,of  pafTingAfFccSlions  ; 
but  a  Change  of  Nature^  a  Change  ot  the  abiding  Habit  and 
Temper  of  his  Mind.  Nor  a  partial  Change,  meerly  in  Point 
of  Opinion,  or  outward  Reformation  5  much  lefs  a  Change 
from  one  Error  to  another,  or  from  one  Sin  to  another  :  but 
an  univerfal  Change,  both  internal  and  external  ;  as  from  cor- 
rupt and  dangerous  Piinciples  in  Religion,  unto  the  Belief  of 
the  Truth,  fo  from  both  the  Habits  and  Ways  of  Sin,  unto  uni- 
verfal Holinefs  of  Heart  and  Pradice  j  from  the  Power  and 
Service  of  Satan,  unto  God. 

2.  His  Religion  did  apparently  and  greatly  differ  from  that 
of  many  high  Pretenders  to  Religion,  who  are  irequently  ac- 
tuated by  vthement  Emotions  of  Mind,  and  are  carried  on  in  a 
Courfc  Qi{  fuddm  zv\{ijircrjg  bnprejjlons,  and  fuppofed  high  lllu- 
minaticns  and  immediate  Difcoveries^  and  at  the  fame  Time  are 
Perfons  of  a  virulent  Zeal,    not  according  to  Knowledge. 

His  Convidlions,  preceeding  his  Converfion,  did  not  arife 
from  any  frightful  hnpnjjiom  on  his  Imagination,  or  any  external 
Images  and  Ideas  of  Fire  and  Brimftone,  a  Sword  of  Vengeance 
drawn,  a  dark  Pit  open,  Devils  in  terrible  Shapes,  ^c.  fliongly 
fix'd  in  hisMind.  His  Sight  of  his  own  Sinfulnefs  did  not  con- 
fiitin  an)  Imagination  of  a  heap  of  loathfome  material  Filthinefs 
within liim;  nor  did  his  Sciife  of  the  Hardnefs  of  his  Heart 
confift  in  any  bodily  feeling  in  his  Breaft  fomething  hard  and 
heavy  like  a  b'tonej  nor  in  any  Imaginations  whatever  of  fuch 
aNafuic. 

His 


On  the  preceeding  Memoirs.'  279 

His  firft  Difcovery  of  God  or  Chrift,  at  his  Converfion,  was 
not  any  ftron^  Idea  of  any  external   Glory  or  Brighlnefs,  or 
Majefty  and  Beauty  of  Countenance,    or  pleafant  Voice  ;  nor 
was  it  any  fuppofed  immediate  Manifeftation  of  God's  Love 
to  him  in  particular  ;  nor  any  Imagination  of   Chrift's  fmiling 
Face,  Arms  open,  or  Words  immediately  fpoken  to  him,  as 
by  Name,  revealing  Chrift's  Love  to  him ;  eiiher  Words  of 
Scriptare,  or  any  other  :  But  a  Manifeftation  of  God's  Glory> 
and  the  Beauty  of  his  Nature,  as  fupremely  excellent  in  it  felf; 
powerfully  drawing, and  fweetly  captivating  hisHeart ;  bringing 
him  to  a  hearty  Delire  to  exalt  God,  fet  him  on  the  Throne, 
and  give  him  fupreme  Honour  and  Glory,  as  the  King  and 
Sovereign  of  the  Univerfe  ;  and  alfo  a  newSenfe  oi  the  infinite 
Wifdom,  Suittblenefs  and  Excellency  of  the  Way  of  Salvation 
by  Chrift  ;  powerfully  engaging  his  whole  Soul   to  embrace 
this  Way  of  Salvation,  and  to  delight  in  it.     His  firft  Faith  did 
not  confift  in  believing  that  Chrift  loved  him,  and  died  for  him, 
in  particular.     His  firft  Comfort  was  not  from  any  fecret  Sug- 
geftitn  of  God's  Eiernal  Love  to  him,  or  that  Qoi  was  recon- 
ciled to  him,  or  intended  great  Mercy   for  him;  by  any  fuch 
Texts  as  thofe,  Son^  be  of  good  Chear^  thy  Sins  are  forgiven  thee  ^ 
Fear  noty    J  am  thy  God^   &c.  or  in  any  fuch  Way.     On  th.c 
contrary,  when  GOD's  Glory  was  firft  difcovcred  to  him,  it 
was  without  any  Thought  of  Salvation  as  his  own.     His  firft 
Experience  of  the  fandifying  &  comforting  Power  of  GOD's 
Spirit  did  not  begin  in  fome    bodily  Senfation,  any  pleafant 
warmFceling  in  his  Breaft,  that  he  (  as  fome  others  )  called  the 
Feeling  the  Love  of  Chrift  in  him,  and  being  full  of  the  Spirit. 
How  exceeding  far  were  his  Experiences  at  his  firft  Converfion 
from  Things  ef  fuch  a  Nature  ! 

And  if  we  look  thro'  the  whole  Series  of  his  Experiences, 
from  his  Converfion  to  his  Death,  we  (hall  find  none  of  this 
Kind.  I  have  had  Occafion  to  read  his  Diary  over  and  over, 
and  very  particularly  andcritically  to  review  everyPaflfage  in  itj 
and  1  findflo  one  Inftance  of  a  ftrong  Impreffion  on  his  Ima- 
gination, through  his  whole  Life  :  No  Inftance  of  a  ftrongly 
imprefs'd  Idea  of  any  external  Glory  and  Brightnefs,  of  any 
bodily  Form  or  Shape,  any  beautiful  Majeftick  Countenance  : 
No  imaginary  Sight  of  Chrift  hanging  on  the  Crofs,  with  his 
Blood  ftreaming  from  his  Wounds;  or  feated  in  Heaven  on  a 
bright  Throne,  with  Angels  and  Saints  bowing  before  him  ;  or 
with  a  Countenance  fmiling  on  him  ;  or  Arms  open  to  embrace 
him  ;  No  Sight  of  Heaven,  in  his  Imagination^  with  Gates  of 

Q  o  Pearl, 


28o  Reflexions  and  Obfervations 

Pearl,  and  Golden  Streets,  and  vaft  Multitudes  of  glorious  In- 
habitantSj  with  (hining  Garments  ;  No  Sight  of  the  Book  of 
Life  opened,  with  his  Name  written  in  it  :  No  hearing  of  the 
fweet  Mufick  made  by  the  Songs  of  heavenly  Hofts ;  No  hear- 
ing G«d  or  Chrift  immediately  fpeaking  to  him  ;  nor  any  fud- 
den  Suggeftions  of  Words  or  Sentences,  either  Words  of 
Scripture,  or  «ny  other,  as  then  immediately  fpoken  or  fent 
to  him :  No  new  obje<5live  Revelations,no  fudden  ftrong  Sug- 
geftions of  fecretFadls.  Nor  do  I  find  any  one  Inftance  in  all 
the  Records  he  has  left  of  his  own  Life, from  Beginning  toEnd, 
of  Joy  excited  from  a  fuppofed  immediat eWitneCs  of  theSpirit; 
or  inward  immediate  Suggeftion,  that  his  State  was  furely 
good,  that  God  loved  bim  with  an  everlaftingLove,  that  Chrift 
died  for  him  in  particular,  and  that  Heaven  was  his ;  either 
with  or  without  a  Text  of  Scripture  :  No  Inftance  ofComfort 
by  a  fudden  bearing  in  upon  hisMind,  as  tho'  at  that  very  Time 
directed  by  God  to  him  in  particular,  any  fuch  kind  of  Texts 
as  thofe  j  F^ar  not^  la?n  with  thee ;  —  ///;  sour  Father*}  good 
Fleajure  to  give,  you  the  Kingdom  ;  —  Tou  have  not  chofen  mey 
hut  1  have  chofen  you  y  —  /  have  called  thee  by  thy  Name,   thou 

art  mine  ; Before  thou  waft  formed  in  the  Belly  ^   1  knew 

theeySic,  No  fuppofedCommunion  &  Converfation  with  GOD 
carried  on  in  this  Way  ;  no  fuch  fuppofed  Tafting  of  the  Love 
ofChrilt.  But  the  Way  he  was  fatisfied  of  his  own  goodEftate, 
even  to  the  entire  abolifiiing  of  Fear,  was  by  Feeling  within 
himfclf  the  lively  ablings  of  a  holy  Temper  and  heavenly  Dif- 
pofition,the  vigorous  Exercifes  of  that  divineLove,which  cafts 
out  Fear  :  This  was  the  Way  he  had  full  Satisfaction  foon  af- 
ter his  Converfion  (  fee  his  Diary  on  0(^ob.  1 8  5c  19.  1740.) 
And  we  find  no  other  Way  of  Satisfaction  through  his  whole 
Life  afterwards  :  And  this  he  abundantly  declared  to  be  the 
Way,  the  only  Way,  that  he  had  complete  Satisfaction,  when 
he  looked  Death  in  the  Face,  in  it's  near  Approaches. 

Some  of  the  Pretenders  to  an  immediate  Witnefs  by  Suggefti- 
on, and  Defenders  of  it,  with  an  afTuming  Confidence,  would 
bear  ur  in  Hand,  that  there  is  no  full  Afiurance  without  it  ; 
and  that  the  Way  of  being  fatisfied  by  Signs,  and  arguing  an 
Intereft  in  Chrift  from  SanCtification,  if  it  will  keep  Men  qui- 
et in  Life  and  Health,  yet  will  never  do  when  they  come  to 
eiie :  .^Then  ( they  fay  )  Men  muft  have  immediate  Witnefs,  or 
cHc  be  in  a  dreadful  Uncertainty.  But  Mr.  Brainera'sEx^eri' 
cnce  is  a  Confutation  of  this  ;  for  in  him  we  have  an  Inftance 
of  one  that  poirsfi'd  as  cgnftant  and  unfhaken  an  AiTurance, 

thro* 


On  the  preaeding  Memoirs.  2  S  i 

thro'  the  Courfe  of  his  Life,  after  Con vcrfion,  as  perhaps  can 
be  produced  in  this  Age  ;  which  yet  he  obtained  and  enjoy*d 
without  any  fuch  Sort  of  Teflimony^  and  without  all  Manner  of 
Appearance  ofit,orPretence  to  it  5  yea,while  utterly  difclaim- 
ing  any  fuch  Thing,  and  declaring  againft  it :  And  one  whdfe 
Afrurance,we  need  not  fcruple  to  affirm,  has  as  fair aClaim, and 
as  juft  a  Pretenfion  to  Truth  and  Genuinenefs,"  as  any  that  the 
Pretenders  to  immediate  Wiinefi  can  produce  :  And  not  only 
an  Inftance  of  one  that  had   fuch  AfTurance  in  Life,  but  had  it 
in  a  conftant  Manner  in  his  lafl  Illnefs  ;  and  particularly  in 
the  latter  Stages  of  it,  through  thofe  laft  Months  of  his  L/ife, 
wherein  Death  was  more  fcnfibly   approaching,    without  the 
leaft  Hope  of  Life  :  And  had  it  too  in  it's  Fulnefs^  and  in  the 
Height  of  it's  Exercife,  under  thofe  repeated  Trials,  that  he 
had  in  this  Space  of  Time  ;  when  brought  from  Time  toTime 
to  the  very  Brink  of  the  Grave,  expci^ing  in  a  fcwMinutes  to 
be  in  Eternity.     He  had   the  full  j^Jurance  of  Hope^  unto    the 
End*     When  on  the  Verge  of  Eternity,    he  then  declares  his 
AfTurance  to  be  fuch  as  perfectly  fecluJed    all  Fear  ;  and  not 
only  fo,  but  it  manifeftly  fill'd  his  Soul  with  exceeding  Joy  : 
He  declaring  at  the  fame  Time,  that  this  his  Confolatlon  and 
good  Hope  thro*  Grace  arofe  wholly  from  the  Evidence  he  had 
of  his  good  Eftatc,  by  what  he  found  of  his  San<3:ifieation,  or 
thcExercife  of  a  holy  heavenlyTemper  of  Mind,fupreme  Love 
to  God,  if^c.  and  not  in  the  leaft  from  any  immediate  Witnefs 
by  Suggeftion  :  Yea,  he  declares  that  at  thefe  very  Times   he 
faw  the  awful  Delufion  of  that  Confidence  which    is  built  on 
fuch  a  Foundation,   as  well  as  of  the  whole  of  that  Religion 
which  it  ufually  fprings  from,  or  at  leaft  is  the  Attendant  of  5 
and  that  his  Soul  abhor'd   thofe  Delufions  :    And  he  continued 
in  this  Mindjoften  expreifing  it  with  much  Solcmnity,€ven  'till 
Death. 

Mr.  Brainerd*s  Religion  was  not  felji/h  and  mercenary  :  His 
Love  to  God  was  primarily  and  principally  for  the  fupreme 
Excellency  of  his  own  Nature,  and  not  built  on  a  preconceived 
.  Notion  that  God  loved  him^  had  received  him  into  Favour, and 
had  done  greatThings  for  him,or  promifed  greatThings  to  htm  : 
So  hisjoy  was  Joy  in  God, and  not  in  himfelf.  We  fee  by  his 
Diary  how,  from  Time  to  Time,  through  the  Courfe  of  his 
Life,  his  Soul  was  fiird  with  inefFable  Sweetnefs  and  Comfort. 
But  what  was  the  Spring  of  this  ftrong  and  abiding  Confo- 
latlon ?  Not  fo  much  the  Confideration  of  the  fure  Grounds 
^e  had  to  think  that  his  State  was  good, that  God  had  delivered 

O  o  2  faim 


2S2  Rcfleftions  and  Obfcrvaiions 

him  from  Hell,  and  that  Heaven  was  bis ;  or  any  ThotSghti 
concerning  his  own  diftinguiflied  happy  and  exalted  Circunt- 
flances,  as  a  high  Favourite  ot  Heaven:  But  the  fweet  Medi- 
tations and  entertaining  Vtews  he  had  of  divine  Things  without 
himfelf ;  the  affecting  Confiderations  and  liveiy  Ideas  of  God's 
infinite  Glory,  his  unchangeable  Blefledners,  his  Sovereignty 
and  univcrfal  Dominion  ;  together  with  the  f^cet  Exercifes  of 
Lvove  to  GOD,  giving  himfelf  up  to  him,  abafing  himfelf  be- 
fore him,deny/ng  himfelf  for  him,  depending  upon  him,  adting 
for  his  Glory,  diligently  ferving  him  ;  and  the  pleafing  Prof- 
peels  or  Hopes  he  had  of  a  future  Advancement  of  the  King- 
dom of  Chnft,  i^c. 

It  appears  plainly  and  abundantly  all  along,from  hisConver- 
fion  to  his  Death,  that  that  Beauty,  that  S.irt  of  Good,  which 
was  the  great  Ooje£l  of  the  n'^v  Senfe  of  his  Mind,  the  new 
Reiifh  and  Appetite  given  him  in  Converfion,  and  thenecfor-^ 
ward  maintained  ancl  increafed  in  his  H'.art,  was  HOLINESS, 
Conformity  to  God,  living  to  God,  and  glorifying  Him.  This 
was  wlia-  drew  hisHeari  ;  this  was  the  Center  of  his  Soul  ;  this 
was  the  Ocean  ro  which  ail  the  treams  of  his  religious  Affec- 
tions tended  :  This  was  the  Objedt  that  engaged  his  eager 
thirflingDefires  and  earneft  Purfuits  :  He  knew  no  true  Excel- 
Jeney  or  Happinefs,  but  this :  This  was  what  he  Jonged  for 
moft  vehemently  and  conftantly  on  Earth  ;  and  this  was  with 
him  the  Beauty  and  Bleilednefs  of  Heaven  ;  which  made  him  fo 
much  and  fo  often  to  long  for  that  VVorld  of  Glory  ;  it  was  to 
be  perfe^Slly  holy,  and  perfectly  exercifed  in  the  holy  Employ- 
ments of  Heaven  ;  thus  to  glorifvGod  and  enjoy  him  forever. 

His  religious  Illuminations,  AfFedlions  and  Comfort  feem'd, 
to  a  great  Degree, to  be  attended  vtkhEvangelical  Humiliation  ; 
confifting  in  a  Senfe  of  his  own  utter  Infufficiency,Defpicable- 
nefs  andOJioufnefs  ;  with  an  anfwerable  Difpofition  andFrame 
of  Heart,  How  deeply  afFeiled  was  he  almoft  continually  with 
his  greatDefeds  in  Religion ;  with  his  vatt  Diftance  from  that 
Spirituality  and  holy  Frame  of  Mind  that  became  him  ;  with 
his  Ignorance,  Pride,  Deadnefs,  Unfteadinefs,  Batrennefs  ? 
He  ;vas  not  only  afFed^ed  with  the  Remembrance  of  hisfo^mer 
SiafulnefSi  before  his  Canverfion,  but  with  the  Senfe  ofhi.a^ 
prefect  V^iienef?  arjd  Po  lution.  He  was  not  only  difpofed  to 
think  meanly  of  himfeif  as  before  God,  and  in  Comparifon  of 
him  ;  but  among/}  Men^  and  as  compared  with  them  :  He  was 
!:p:  to  think  othcrSaii.ts  better  than  he;  yea,  to  look  on  himfelf 
?s  the  meaneft  and  ie^it  of  Saints  ^  yea,    very  qh^Up  3S  the 

yiJcft 


On  the  preceeding  Memoirs;  283 

vileft  and  worft  of  Mankind.  And  notwithftanding  his  great 
Attainments  in  fpiritual  Knowledge^  yet  we  find  there  is  fcarce 
any  Thing  that  he  is  more  frequently  afFedted  and  abafed  with 
a  Senfe  of,  than  his  Ignorance, 

How  eminently  did  he  appear  to  be  of  a  meek  and  quiet  Spirit, 
refemblingtheLamb-like,Dovc-likeSpirit  of  JefusChrift  !  How 
full  of  Love,  Meeknefs,  Quietncfs,  Forgivenefs  and  Mercy  ! 
His  Love  was  not  meerly  a  Fondnefs  and  Zeal  for  a  Party,  but 
an  univcrfal  Benevolence  ;  very  often  cxercifed  in  the  moft 
fenfible  and  ardent  Love  to  his  greateft  Oppofcrs  and  Enemies. 
His  Love  and  Meeknefs  were  not  a  mcer  Pretence,  and  out- 
ward Profeffion  and  Shew ;  but  they  were  efFe(5lual  Things, 
manifefted  in  expenfive  and  painful  Deeds  of  Love  and  Kind- 
nefs ;  and  in  a  meekBehaviour  ;  readily  confeffingFaults  under 
the  greateft  Trials,  and  humbling  himfelf  even  at  the  Feet  of 
thofe  from  whom  he  fuppofed  he  had  fuiFered  moft  ;  and  from 
Time  to  Time,  very  frequently  praying  for  his  Enemies,  ab- 
horring the  Thoughts  of  Bitternefs  or  Refentment  towards 
them.  I  fcarcely  know  where  to  look  for  any  parallel  Inftance 
of  Self-denial,  in  thefe  Refpedls,  in  the  prefent  Age.  He  was 
a  Perfon  of  great  Zeal ;  bat  how  did  he  abhor  a  bitter  Zeal, 
and  lament  it  where  he  faw  it  !  And  tho*  he  was  once  drawn 
into  fome  Degrees  of  it,  by  the  Force  of  prevailing  Example, 
as  it  were  in  his  Childhood  ;  yet  how  did  he  go  about  with  a 
Heart  bruifed  and  broken  in  Pieces  for  it  all  his  Life  after  I 

Of  hovrfoft  and  tender  a  Spirit  was  he  !  How  far  were  his 
Experiences,  Hopes^andjoys  from  a  Tendency  finally  to  ftupi- 
iy  and  harden  him,  to  lefTen  Convi<5lions  and  Tendernefs  of 
Confcience,  to  caufe  him  to  be  lefs  afFecSed  with  prefent  and 
paft  Sins,  and  lefs  confcientious  with  Refpe6t  to  future  Sins, 
more  eafy  in  the  Negle6t  of  Duties  that  are  troublefome  and 
inconvenient,  more  flow  and  partial  in  complying  with  difficult 
Commands,  lefs  apt  to  be  alarmed  at  the  Appearance  of  his 
own  Dcfcdls  andTranfgreflions,  moreeafily  induced  to  a  Com- 
pliance with  carnal  Appetites  I  On  the  contrary,  how  tender 
was  his  Confcience  !  How  apt  was  his  Heart  to  fmite  him  ! 
How  cafily  and  greatly  was  he  alarmed  at  the  Appearance  of 
ypioral  Evil  !  How  great  and  conftant  was  his  Jealoufy  over 
his  own  Heart !  How  ftridl  his  Care  and  Watchfulnefs  againft 
Sin  I  How  deep  and  fenfible  were  the  Wounds  that  Sin  made 
in  his  Confcience  !  Thofe  Evils  that  are  generally  accounted 
fmall,  were  almoft  an  infupportable  Burden  to  him  ;  fuch  as 
Jjis  inward Deficiencie5,his  having  no  more  Love  toGOD,find- 

ing 


1234  Reflexions  and  Obfervations 

ing  within  himfelf  any  flacknefs  or  dulnefs  in  Religion,  any 
Unfteadinefs,  or  wandriag  Frame  of  Mind,  &c.  How  did  the 
Confideration  of  fuch  Things  as  thefe  opprefs  and  abafc  him, 
and  fill  him  with  inward  Shame  and  Confufion  !  HisLove  and 
Hope,  tho'  they  were  fuch  as  caft  out  a  fervile  Fear  o^  Hell, 
yet  they  were  fuch  as  were  attended  with,and  abundantly  chc- 
rifh'd  and  promoted  a  reverential  filial  Fear  of  God,  a  Oread 
of  Sin  and  of  God's  holy  Difpleafure.  His  Joy  feem 'd  truly 
to  be  a  rejoicing  with  Trembling.  His  AfTurance  and  Com- 
fort differed  greatly  from  a  falfe  enihufiaftick  Confidence  and 
Joy,  in  that  it  promoted  and  maintained  Mourning  for  Sin  : 
holy  mourning,  with  him,  was  not  only  the  Work  of  an  Hour 
or  a  Day,  at  his  firft  Converfion  ;  but  Sorrow  for  Sin  was  like 
aWound  conflantly  running  :  He  was  aMourner  for  Sin  all  his 
Days.  He  did  not,  after  he  received  Comfort  and  full  Satis- 
fadtion  of  the  Forgivenefs  of  all  his  Sins,  and  the  Safety  of  his 
State,  forget  his  paft  Sins,  the  Sins  of  his  Youth,  that  were 
committed  before  his  Converfion  ;  but  the  Remembrance  of 
them,  from  Time  to  Time,  reviv'd  in  his  Heart,  with  renew- 
ed Grief.  That  in  Ezek.  xvi.  63.  was  evidently  fulfil'd  in 
him,  That  thou  may  ft  remember^  and  he  confounded^  and  never  open 
ihy  Mouth  any  more^  becaufe  of  thy  Shame  ;  when  1  am  pacified 
toward  thee  for  alt  that  thou  haji  done.  And  how  laftingly 
did  the  Sins  that  he  committed  after  his  Converfion,  afFe6tand 
break  his  Heart  !  If  he  did  any  Thing  whereby  he  thought  he 
had  in  any  Refpedldifhonoured  God,  and  wounded  thelnterefl 
of  Religion,  he  had  never  done  with  calling  it  to  Mind  with 
Sorrow  and  Bitternefs :  Thd'  he  was  alTured  that  God  had 
forgiven  it,  yet  he  never  forgave  himfelf  :  His  paft  Sorrows 
andjFears  made  no  Satisfadtion,  with  him  ;  but  ftill  the  Wound 
renews  and  bleeds  afrefh,  again  and  again.  And  his  prefent 
Sins,  that  he  daily  found  in  himfelf,  were  an  Occafion  of  daily 
fcnfiblc  and  deep  Sorrow  of  Heart. 

His  Religion  did  not  confift  in  unaccountable  Flights  and 
vehement  Pangs  ;  faddenly  rifing,  and  fuddenly  falling  ;  at 
fome  Turns  exalted  almoft  to  the  third  Heavens,  and  then  at 
other  Turns  negligent,  vain, carnal,  and  fwallowed  up  with  the 
World  ;  for  Days  and  Weeks,  if  not  Months  together.  His 
Religion  was  not  like  a  blazingMeteor,or  like  a  flamingComet, 
(or  a  wandring  Star, as  the  Apoftlejw^^  calls  it,  ver.  13.  j  flying 
thro'  theFirmament  with  a  brightTrain  ;  &  then  quickly  going 
out  in  perfed^Darknefs :  But  more  like  the  fteadyLights  ofHea- 
vens   that  are  conftant  Principles  of  Light,  tho*  fometimes  hid 

with 


On  the  preceeding  Memoits;  285 

With  Clouds.  Nor  like  a  Land-Flood,  which  flows  far  and 
wide,  with  a  rapid  Stream,  bearing  down  all  afore  it,  and  then 
dried  up  ;  but  more  like  a  Stream  fed  by  livingSprings ;  which 
tho'  fometimes  increafed  by  Showers,  and  at  other  Times  di- 
minifticd  by  Drought,  yet  is  a  conjiant  Stream, 

His  religious  AiFedlions  and  Joys  were  not  like  thofc  of 
fome,  who  have  Rapture  and  mighty  Emotions  from  Time  to 
Time  in  Company ;  but  have  very  little  AfFe£lion  in  Retirement 
and  fecret  Places.  Tho'  he  was  of  a  very  fociableTemper,  and 
loved  theCompany  ofSaints,and  delighted  very  much  in  religi- 
ous Converfation  and  in  focial  Worfliip  ;  yet  his  warmeft  Af- 
fedlions  and  their  greateft  EfFe6ls  on  animal  Nature,  and  his 
fweeteftjoys,  were  in  his  Clofet- Devotions, and  folitaryTranf- 
adlions  between  God  and  his  own  Soul  ;  as  is  very  obfervable 
thro'  his  whole  Courfe,  from  his  Convcrfion  to  his  Death.  He 
delighted  greatly  in  facredRetirements  ;  and  loved  to  get  quite 
away  from  all  the  World,  to  converfe  withGoD  alone,in  fecret 
Duties. 

Mr.  Brainerd^s  Experiences  and  Comforts  were  very  far 
from  being  like  thofe  of  fome  Perfons, which  are  attended  with 
a  fpiritual  Satiety,  and  put  an  End  to  their  religious  Defires  and 
Longings,  at  leaftto  the  Edge  and  Ardency  of  them  ;  refting 
fatisfied  in  their  own  Attainments  and  Comforts,  as  haviirg  ob- 
tained their  chief  End,  which  is  to  extinguifti  their  Fears  of 
Hell,  and  give  'em  Confidence  of  the  Favour  of  GOD.  How 
far  were  his  religious  AfFe(Slions,Refrefhments,  &  SatisfaiStions, 
from  fuch  an  Operation  and  Influence  as  this  !  On  the  contra- 
ry, how  were  they  always  attended  with  Longings  and  Thirft- 
ings  after  greater  Degrees  of  Conformity  to  God  !  And  the 
greater  and  fweeter  his  Comforts  were,  the  more  vehement 
were  his  Defires  after  Holinefs,  For  'tis  to  be  obferved,  that 
hisLongings  were  notfo  much  after  joyfulDifcoveries  of  God's 
Love  and  clear  Views  of  his  Title  to  future  Advancement  and 
eternal  Honours  in  Heaven  ;  as  after  more  of  prefent  Holinefs, 
greater  Spirituality,  an  Heart  more  engaged  for  GOD,  to  love 
and  exalt  and  depend  on  him,  an  Ability  better  to  ferve  him, 
to  do  more  for  his  Glory,  and  to  do  all  that  he  did  with  more 
of  a  Regard  to  Chrift  as  his  Righteoufnefs  and  Strength  ;  and 
after  the  Enlargement  and  Advancement  of  Chrilt's  Kingdom 
in  the  Earth.  And  his  Defires  were  not  idle  wifhings  and 
wouldingSj  but  fuch  as  were  powerful  and  efFe6lual,  to  ani- 
mate him  to  the  earneft,  eager  purfuic  of  thefe  Things,  with 
utmoft  Diligence  and  unfainiing  Labour  and  Self-denial.    His 

Comforts 


286  Refledlions  and  Ohkrv^tions 

Comforts  never  put  an  End  to  his  feeking  after  GOD,  and 
ftriving  to  obtain  his  Grace  ;  but  on  the  contrary,  greatly  en- 
gaged and  enlarged  him  therein. 

His  Religion  did  not  confi^  only  in  Experience  tV/hhout  Prac* 
itce,  All  his  inward  Illuminations,  Affedions  and  ComJorts 
feemM  to  have  adiredl  Tendency  to  Pradice,  and  to  iffuc  in 
it !  And  this,  notmeerly  a  Pradtice  negatively  good,  Ugc  from 
grofs  A6ls  of  Irreligion  and  Immorality  ;  But  a  Practice  pofi^' 
tively  Holy  and  Chrif^ian,  in  a  ferious,  devout,  humble,  mtek, 
merciful,  charitable,  and  beneficent  Converfation  ;  making 
the  Service  of  GOD,  and  our  Lord  Jefus  Chrift,  the  greatBu- 
linefs  of  Life,  which  he  was  devoted  to,  and  purfued  with  the 
greatcft  Earneftnefs  and  Diligence  to  the  End  of  his  Days, 
thro'  all  Trials.  In  him  was  to  be  feen  the  right  Way  of  be- 
ing lively  in  Religion  :  His  Livelinefs  in  Religion  did  notcorfift 
meerly  or  mainly  in  his  being  lively  with  the  Tongue^  but  in 
Deed  i  not  in  being  forward  in  Profeflion  and  outward  bbew, 
and  abundant  in  declaring  his  own  Experiences  ;  but  chief!)  in 
being  a6tive  and  abundant  m  theLabours  &Duties  of  Religion  ; 
not  flotkful  in  Bufmefsy  but  fervent  in  Spirit,  ferving  the  Lordy 
and  ferving  his  Generatiov^  according  to  the  fVill  of  God. 

By  thefe  Things,  many  high  Pretenders  to  Religion, andPro- 
fefTorsot  extraordinary  fpiritual  Experience,  may  be  fenfible, 
that  Mr.  Brainerd  did  greatly  condemn  their  kind  of  Religion; 
and  that  not  only  in  Word, but  byExample,both  living  and  dy- 
ing ;  as  the  whole  Series  of  his  Chriflian  Experience  andPrac- 
tice,  from  his  Converfion  to  his  Death, appears  a  conftantCon- 
demnation  of  it. 

It  can't  be  objected, that  theReafon.why  he  fo  much  difliked 
the  Religion  of  thefePretenders,  and  why  his  own  fo  much  dif- 
fered from  it,  was,  that  his  Experiences  were  not  clear.  There 
is  no  Room  to  fay,  they  were  otherwife,  in  any  Refpedt,  in 
which  Clearnefs  of  Experience  has  been  wont  to  be  infifted  on; 
whether  it  be  the  Clearnefs  of  their  h^ature,  or  of  their  O^der^ 
and  the  Method  his  Soul  was  at  firfl  brought  toRelt  ar.d  Com- 
fort in  his  Converfion.  I  am  far  from  thinking  (  and  fo  was 
he)  that  Clear nefs  of  ihe  Order  of  Experience  is,  in  any  Mca- 
furc,  of  equal  Importance  with  the  Clearnefs  of  their  Mature  .* 
I  have  fufficiently  declared  in  my  Difcourfe  on  Religious J^fft if i- 
ens  (which  he  exprefly  approved  of  and  recommended  )  that  I 
don't  ruppofe,a  fenfible  Difiin6nefs  of  the  5/^pJofthe  Spirit's 
Operation  and  Method  of  fucccffive  Cojivi6lions  and  Illumina- 
ticns,  isanecefiary  Requifite  W  Perfons  being  received  in  full 

Charity, 


On  the  preceeding  Memoirs:  2^7 

Charity,  as  true  Saints  ;  provided  the  Nature  of  the  Things 
they  profefs,  be  right,  and  their  Praftice  agreeable.  Ncverthe- 
lefs,  'tis  obfervabic,  (  which  cuts  ofFallObjetaion  from  fuch  as 
would  be  moft  unreafonably  difpofed  to  objecSl  and  cavil  in  the 
prefentCafc  )  So  it  was,  that  Mr. Sraitierd's  Experiences  were 
not  only  clear  in  the  latter  Refpedt,  but  remarkably  fo  in  the 
former :  So  that  there  is  not  perhaps  one  Inftance  in  fiveHun- 
dred  true  Converts,  that  on  this  Account  can  be  parallcl'd 
with  him. 

It  can't  be  pretended  ,  that  the  Reafon  why  he  To  much  ah- 
hor'd  and  condemned  the  Notions  and  Experiences  of  thofc 
whofe/r/?  Faith  confifts  in  believing  that  Chrift ;;  theirs,  and 
that  Chrift  died  for  them  j  without  any  previous  Experience  of 
Union  of  Heart  to  him,  for  his  Excellency,  as  he  is  in  himfelf, 
and  not  for  his  fuppofed  Love  to  them  ;  and  who  judge  of  theic 
Intereft  in  Chrift,  their  Juftification,  and  GOD's  Love  fo 
them,  not  by  their  Sandtification  and  the  Exercifes  and  Fruits 
of  Grace,  but  by  a  fuppofed  immediate  Witnefs  of  the  Spirit,  by 
inward  Suggeftion  ;  I  fay,  it  can't  be  pretended,  that  theRea- 
fon  why  he  fo  much  deteftcd  and  condemned  fuch  Opinions 
and  Experiences,  was,  that  he  was  of  a  too  legal  Spint  ;  either 
that  he  never  was  dead  to  the  Law,  never  experienced  a  thoro* 
Work  of  Convidlion,was  never  fully  brought  off  from  his  own 
Rightcoufnefs,and  wean'd  from  the  old  Covenant ^hy  a  thorough 
legal  Humiliation  ;  or  that  afterwards,  he  had  no  great  De- 
gree of  *va«f*//Vfl/ Humiliation,  not  living  in  a  deep  Scnfe  of 
his  own  Emplinefs,  Wretchednefs,  Poverty,  and  abfolute  De- 
pendance  on  the  mecr  Grace  of  GOD  through  Chrift.  For 
hisConvi<5tions  of  Sin, preceeding  his  firftConfolations  inChrift, 
were  exceeding  deep  and  thorough ;  his  Trouble  and  Exercife 
of  Mind,  by  a  Senfeof  Sin  and  Miferj,  very  great  and  long 
continued  ;  &  theLight  let  into  hisMind  at  hisConverfion  and 
in  progreflive  San6tification,  appears  to  have  had  its  genuine 
humbling  Influence  upon  him,  to  have  kept  him  low  in  his 
ownEyes,not  confiding  in  himfelf,  but  in  Chrift,  living  by  tht 
Faith  of  the  Son  of  GOD,  and  looiing  for  the  Mercy  of  the  Ltrd 
Jejus  to  eternal  Life, 

Nor  can  it  be  pretended,  that  theReafon  why  he  condemned 
thofe,  and  other  Things,  which  this  Sort  ot  People  call  the  very 
Height  of  vital  Religion  and  the  Power  ofGodlinefs,  was, that 
he  was  a  dead  Chrifiian,  and  lived  in  the  Dark  (as  they  cxprefs 
thcmfelves  )  that  his  Experiecces,  tho'  they  mi^ht  be  true, 
were  not  great  3  that  he  did  not  live  near  to  GOD,  had  but  a 

P  p  fmail 


288  Refleftions  ctnd  Obfervatiofts 

fmall  Acquaintance  with  him,  and  had  but  a  dim  Sight  of  fpi- 
ritual  Things.  If  any,  after  they  have  read  the  preceedL 
Account  of  Mr.  Brainerd's  Life,will  venture  to  pretend  thus! 
they  will  only  fhew  that  they  them/elves  are  in  the  Dark  and^ 
do  indeed  put  Darknefsfor  Light,  and  Light  for  Darknefs,  ' 

jTis  common  with  this  Sort  of  People,  if  there  is  any  one 
whom  they  can't  deny  to  exhibit  goodEvidencesof  true  God- 
Jinefsjwho  yet  appears  to  dillike  theirNotions,&  condemn  thofc 
Thmgs  wherem  they  place  theHeight  of  ReIigion,toinfinuate, 
that  they  an  afraid  of  the  Crofs,  and  have  a  Mind  to  curry  Fa- 
vour with  the  World,  and  the  like.  But  I  prefume,  this  will 
not  be  pretended  concerning  Mr.  Brainerd,  by  any  one  Perfon 
that  has  read  the  preceeding  Account  of  hisLifc.  It  muft  needs 
appear  aThing  notorious  to  fuch,that  he  was  an  extraordinary 
and  almoft  unparalleled  Inftance  (  in  thefe  Times  and  thefe 
Parts  of  the  World  )  of  the  contrary  Difpofition  :  and  that, 
whether  we  confider  what  he  has  recorded  of  his  inward  Ex- 
perience, from  Time  to  Times  or  his  Praaice^ho^N  he  in  Faa 
took  up  and  embraced  the  Crofs,  and  bore  it  conftantly,  in 
his  great  Self- Denials,  Labours,  and  Sufferings  for  the  Name 
ofjefus,  and  went  on  without  fainting,  without  repenting, 
or  rep.ning,  to  his  dying  Illnefs  :  How  he  did  not  only,  from 
lime  to  Time,  relmquifh  and  renounce  the  IVorld  (tcrtily, 
in  his  Heart,  with  the  full  and  ferventConfent  of  all  thePowcrs 
of  his  Soul  s  but  openly  and  a^ually  forfook  the  World,  with 
It  s  l^olieffions.  Delights,  and  common  Comforts,  to  dwell  as 
It  were  with  wild  Beafts,  in  a  howlingWiidernefs  ;  with  con- 
Itant  Chearfulnefs,  complying  with   the  nutaerous  Hardfhips 

ru    .    ''n^''''^"^'^'''"'^^^'^^^'   to  promote   the  Kingdom 
of  his  dear  Redeemer.   And  befides,  it  appears  by  the  preceed- 
ing Hittory,  that  he  never  did  more  condemn  the  Things  fore- 
mention  d,    never  had  a  greater  Senfe  of  their  Delulion,  per- 
nicious  Nature    and  ill  Tendency,  and  never  was  more  full  of 
F.tytothofe  that  are    led  av.ay  with   them,  than    in    his  lafl 
Jilnefs  and  atT.mes  when  he  had  the  neareftProfpecl  of  Death, 
fuppofed  himfelfto  be  on  the  very  Brink  of  Eternity,and  looked 
on  all    this  lower  World  as.  what   he  never  (hould  have  any 
ihmgmore  to  do  with.     Surely  he  did  not  condemn  thofc 
1  h.ngs  at  the.e  Seaibns,  only  to  curry  Favour  with  the  IVorld. 
iieades  what  has  been  already  related  of  Mr.^r^rW^'s  Sen- 
t.ments  in  his  dy.ng  State    conce:..}ng  true  and  falfe  Religion, 
we  have  hi,  dehberate  and  foiemn  Tbo'ts  on  this  Subieaffur- 
ther  appearing  by  his  Frefac^  lo  Mr.  ^hepari'i  Diary,   before 

menlioncd  j 


On  the  preceeding  Memoirs;  289 

mentioned  ;  which,  when  he  wrote  if,  he  fuppofed  to  be  (  at 
it  proved)  one  of  the /^  Things  he  fhould  ever  write,  ilhall 
here  inferl  a  Part  of  that  Preface^  as  follows. 

"  How  much  Strefs  is  laid    by  many  upon  fome  Things  as 
.<«  being  EfFe£ls  andEvidences  of  exalted  Degrees  of  Reh'gion, 
*'  when  they  are  fo  far  from  being  of  any  Importance  in  it, 
*'    that  they  are  really  irreligious,  a  Mixture  oiSelf- Lovg^  Ima^ 
*'  gination^  2nd  f^mtuzl  Prid^,   or  perhaps   the  Influence   bf 
*'  5fl/fl»  transformed  into  anAngel  ofLight  ;  I  fay, how  much 
*'  Strefs  is  laid  on  thefeThings  by  many, I  fhall  not  determine  : 
•'  But 'tismuch  to  be  fear'd,  that  while  GOD  was  carrying 
«'  on  a  glorious  Work  of  Grace,  and  undoubtedly  gathering 
•*  a  Harvcft  of  Souls  to  himfelf  (  which  we  fhould  always  re- 
'^  member  with  Thankfulnefs )  Numbers  of  others  have  at  the 
•«  fame  Time  been  fatally  deluded  by  the  Devices  of  iheDevil, 
*'  and  their  own  corrupt  Hearts.     It  is  to  be  fear'd,  that  the 
«*  Canverjions  oi  fome  have   no  better  Foundation  than  this  ; 
*'  viz.  That  after  they   have   been   under   fome  Concern  for 
«<  their  Souls  for  a  while,  and  it  may  be  manifefted    fome 
<c  very   great   and  uncommon    Diftrefs  and  Agonies,    they 
*<  have  on  a  fudden  imagined  they  /hzvChrist ^in  fomePof^ure 
*'  or  other  ;  perhaps  on  theCrofs,  bleeding  and  dying  for  their 
*'  Sins  ;  or  it  may  be,  fmiling  on  them,  and  thereby  fignify- 
*«  ing  his  Love  to  them  :  And  that  thefe  and  the  like  Things, 
**  tho*  meer  Imaginations,   which  have  nothing   Spiritual  in 
•'  them,  have  inftantly  removed  all  their  Fears  and  DiftrefTes, 
**  fill'd  them  with  Raptures  of  Joy,  and  made  them  imagine, 
♦«  that  they  loved  Chrift  with  all  their  Hearts  ;  when'theBot- 
*'  torn  of  all  was  Nothing  but  Self-love.    For  when  they  ima- 
*'  gined  that  Chrift  had  been  fo  good  to  them  as  to  fave  them, 
*'  and  as  it  were  to  fingle   them  out  of  all  the  World,   they 
*'  could  not  but-feel  fome  kind  of  natural  Gratitude  to  him  ; 
*'  altho'  they  neverhad  any  fpiritual  View  of  his  divineGlory, 
*'  Excellency  and  Beauty,  and  confequently   never  hsd   any 
*'  Love  to  him  for  himfelf.      Or  that  inftead  of  having  fome 
*'  fuch  imaginary  View  of  Chrift  as  has  been  mentioned,  in 
**  order  to  remove  their  Diftrefs   and    give  them  Joy,  feme 
*'  having  had  a  Paflage,  or  perhaps  many  PafTages  of  Scripture 
*«  brought   to  their  Minds  with  Power    ( as  they  exprefs  it  ) 
•«  fuch  as  that.  Son,  be  of  good  C  hear, thy  Sins  are  forgiven  thee^ 
*'  and  the  like,  thev  have  immediately   applied  thefe  PafTages 
**  to  themfelviSy  fuppofmg  that   God    hereby  manifefted  his 
♦'  peculiar  Favour  to  them^  as  if  mention'd  by  Name  :  Never 

P  p  2  confidcring; 


290  Rcfleftions  and  Obfervationa 

«*  confidering,  that  they  are  now  giving  Heed  to  new  Revc- 
*'  lations  ;  there  being  no  fuch  Thing  reveard  in  the  Word 
*«  of  God,  as  that  this  or  that  particular  Pcrfon  has,  or  ever 
^*  fliall  have  his  Sins  forgiven  ;  nor  yet  remembring,  that  Sa- 
•«  tan  can,  with  a  great  deal  of  feeming  Pertinency  (and  per- 
*«  haps  alfo  with  confiderable  Power)  bring  Scripture  to  the 
«'  Minds  of  Men, as  he  did  10  Chrift  himfelr.  And  thus  thefc 
>*  rejoyce  upon  having  fome  Scripiure  fuddcnly  fuggetted  to 
■*  them,  or  imprefs^d  upon  their  Minds,  fuppofing  they  arc 
*«  now  the  Children  ofGod,  juft  as  did  the  other  upon  their 
««  imaginary  Views  of  Chrift.  And  'tis  faid,  that  fome  fpeaJc 
««  of  feeing  a  gTcatLight^  which  filTd  all  the  PJacc  where  they 
*'  were,  and  difpel'd  ail  their  Darknefs,  Fears  and  DiftreiTes, 
*'  and  almoft  ravi{h*d  their  Souls.  While  others  have  had  it 
«'  warmlv  fuggefted  to  their  Minds,  not  by  any  PaiFage  of 
*«  Scripture,  but  as  ir  were  by  a  Whifptr  or  Voice  from  Hca- 
•'  ven,  7hat  God  loves  them^  that  Chriji  is  thtirsy  &c.  which 
*'  groundlefs  Imaginations  and  Suggcftions  of  Satan  have  had 
*'  the  fame  EfFed  upon  them,  that  the  Dclufions.  before  men* 

*'  tion'd  had  on  the  others. And  as  is  the  Converlion 

*'  of  this  Sort  of  Perfons,  fo  are  their  After- Experunces  \  th» 
*«  whole  being  built  upon  Imagination, ftrong  Impreffions,and 
*'  fuddcn  Suggcftions  made  to  their  Minds  :  Whence  thejf 
*'  are  ufually  extreme  confident  (as  if  immediately  informed 
•*  from  God  )  not  only  of  the  Goodnefs  of  their  own  State, 
•«  but  of  their  infallible  Knowledge,  and  abfolute  Certainty, of 
**  the  Truth  of  every  Thing  they  pretend  to,  ander  the  No- 
*'  tion  of  Religion  ;  and  thus  allReafoning  with  fome  of  them 
*'  is  utterly  excluded. 

**   But  *(is  remarkable  of  thefe,  that  they  arc  extremely  defi' 
*'  cient  in  Regard  of  true  Poverty  of  Spirit,  Senfe  of  exceeding 
•*    Vilcnefs  ii)  thenrifelves,  fuch  as  frequently  makes  truly  gra- 
•*   cious  Souls  to  groan,   bting  burdened',  as  alfo  in  Regard  of 
*'  Meckncfb,  Love  and  Geiitlenefs  towards   Mankind,  Tcn- 
**  deriiefs  of  Confcieuce-  in  their  ordinary  AfFairs  and  Dealings 
*'  in  the  VVorld.     And  'tis  rare  to  fee  'em  deeply  concerned 
''  about  the  Principles  and  E^ids  of  their  Adlions,  and  under 
*'  Fears  left  they  (houlJ   not  eye  the  Glory  of  God  chiefly, 
'■^  but  live  to  theinfeivcs  i  or  this  at  Icaft  is  the  Cafe  in   their 
"  ordinary  Condud,  whether  civil  or  religious.     But  if  any 
^'  one  of  their  p?rttcuJarM//5«;,v/hich  theirZeal  hasefpoufed, 
•'  be  artaclc'd,  they  are  flien  fo  coufcicntious,  they  muft  burn^ 
i^'  if  Ga]i'd  to  it,  for  the  Defence  uf  it>  Yet,  at  the  famcTimc, 

*«  when 


On  the  prueding  Memoirt:  29 i 

^  when  they  are  fo  actremtly  deficient  in  Regard  of  thefe  preci- 
c«  ous  divine  Tempers  which  have  been  mention  d,  they  are 
««  ufually  full  of  Zm/,  Concern  and  Fervency  in  the  Things 
.«  of  Religion,  and  often  difcourfe  of  them  with  much  Warmth 
*«  and  Engagement :  And  to  thofe  who  don't  know  or  don  t 
«*  confider,  wherein  the  EJfence  of  trueReligion  confifts,  viz. 
««  in  being  conformed  to  the  Image  of  Chrift ,  not  m  Point  of 
i«  Zealand  Fervency  only,  but  in  all  divine  Tempers  and 
«  Praaices;  1  fay,  to  thofe  who  don't  duly  obfervc  and  dif- 
«  tiiiguifh,  they  often  appear  like  the  beft  of  Men. 

n*i8  common  with  this  Sort  of  People  to  fay,  that  Godts 
amonift  them,hi,^irit  accompanies  their  Exhortattom  and  other  Ad- 
mini/iratiom^and  they  are  feai'd  by  the  holyGhoJi.m  the  remarka- 
ble Succefs  they  have,  in  the  greatAfFeaions  that  are  ftirred  up 
in  God's  People  £^r.  but  to  infmuatc,  on  the  contrary,  tnat 
he  is  not  with  their  Opponents  i   and   particularly,    that  iyod  has 
forfaken  theflanding  Mini/iry  ;  and  that  the  Time  is  come,  when 
it  is  the  mil  of  God  that  they  Jhould  he  put  down,  andthii  iaod  s 
People  Jhouid  for  fake  'em  ;  and  that  no  more  Succefs  is  ^o^^^^' 
peSfed  to  attend  their  Adminiflrations.-  But  where  can  they  hnd  aa 
Inftance,  among  all  their  moft  flaming  Exhorters,^hoh2,s  been 
fealed  with  fo  unconteftible  and  wonderful  Suacefs  of  his  l.a- 
boiirs,as  Mr.  Brainerd,  not  only  in  quickening  and  comforting 
God*8  Children,  but  alfo  in  a  Work  of  Convidion  and  Con- 
verfion  (  which  they  own  has  in  a  great  Meafure  ceafed  for  a 
long  Time  among  themfelves  )  with  a  moft  vifible  and  alto- 
nifhing  Manifeftation  of  God's  Power,  on  Subjeas  fo  unpre- 
pared, and  that  had  been  brought  up  and  lived,   fome  of  them 
to  old  Age,  in  the  deepeft  Prejudices  againft  the  very  hrttrnn- 
ciplcs  of  Chriftianity  ;  the  divine  Power  accompanying  his 
Labours,  producing  the  moft  remarkable  and  abiding  Change, 
turning  the  Wildernefs  into  a  fruitful  Field,  and  caufing  that 
which  was  aDefart  indeed  to  bud  and  blolTom  as  theRofe?  And 
this  altho'  he  was  not  only  one  of  their  greateft  Opponents  \i\ 
their  Errors;  but  alfo   one  of  thofe  they  call  the /?tf«i/«^j^^- 
niflry  j  firft  examined  and  licenfcd  to  preach  hy  fuch  Mtntlters^ 
and  fent  forth  among  the  Heathen  by  fuch  Mini/iers  ;  and  af- 
terwards ordained  hy  fuchMiniJiers ;  always  direaed  by  them, 
and  united  with  them  in  theirConfiftories,andAdminiftrations  ; 
3nd  even  abhorring  thePraaice  of  thofe  who  give  out,that  they 
ought  to  be  renounced  and  feparatcd  from,  and  that  Teachers 
may  be  ordained  by  Lay-Men» 

It 


i^i  Reflexions  and  Obfcrvations 

It  cannot  be  pretended  by  thefe  Men,  that  Mr.  BrainerA 
condemned  their  Religion,  only  becaufe  he  was  not  acquainted 
with  them,  and  had  not  Opportunity  for  full  Obfervationof  the 
Nature,Operation  &  Tendency  of  their  Experiences :  For  he  had 
abundant  and  peculiar  Opportunities  of  fuch  Obfervation  and 
Acquaintance:  He  lived  through  the  late  extraordinary  Time 
of  religious  Commotion,  and  faw  the  Beginning  and  End,  the 
Good  and  the  Bad  of  it :  He  had  Opportunity  to  fee  the  vari« 
ous  Operations  and  Effeds,  that  were  wrought  in  this  Seafon, 
more  exten/wefy,  than  any  Perfon  I  know  of :  His  native  Plaee 
was  about  the  middle  of  Conneificut ;  and  he  was  much  con- 
verfantin  all  Parts  of  that  Colony  :  He  was  converfant  in  the 
Eaftern  Parts  of  it,  after  the  Religion,  which  he  condemned, 
began  much  to  prevail  there  :  He  was  converfant  with  the 
zealous  People  onLong-lJJand.hom  one  End  of  the  Ifland  to  the 
other  ;  and  alfo  in  New-Jerfey,  and  Pennfyhania  ;  with  Pec 
pie  of  various  Nations  :  He  had  fome  fpecial  Opportunities  in 
fome  Places  in  this  Province  (  Maffachufetts-Bay)  where  has 
been  very  much  of  this  Sort  of  Religion,  and  at  a  Time  when 
it  greatly  prevailed  :  He  had  converfed  &  difputed  with  Abun- 
dance of  this  Kind  of  People  in  various  Parts,  as  he  told  me  ; 
and  alfo  informed  me,  that  he  had  feen  fomething  of  the  fame 
Appearances  in  fome  of  the  Indians,  whom  he  had  preached  to, 
and  had  Opportunity  to  fee  the  Beginning  and  End  of  them. 
And  befides,  Mr.  Brainerd  could  fpeak  niore  feelingly  and  un- 
derfiandingly  concerning  thefe  Things,  becaufe  there  was  once 
a  Time  when  he  was  drawn  away  into  an  Efteem  of  them,  and 
for  a  (hort  Seafon  had  united  himfelf  to  this  Kind  of  People, 
and  partook,  in  fome  Refpedls,  of  their  Spirit  and  Behaviour. 

But  I  proceed  to  another  Obferviition  on  the  foregoing 
Memoirs. 

II.  This  Hlffory  of  Mr.  Brainerdh  may  help  us  to  make 
Di/iinSiions  smong  the  high  religious  ^//J?/^;M,and  remarkable 
Jinprefftons  made  on  the  Minds  of  Perfons,  in  a  Time  of  great 
Jwakening^^m\  Revival  of  Rehgion  ;  and  may  convince  us,  that 
there  are  not  only  Difiindlions  in  Theory,  invented  to  fave  the 
Credit  cf  pretended  Revivals  of  Religion,  and  what  is  called 
the  Experience  of  the  Operations  of  the  Spirit ;  but  Diftindions 
that  doaaually  take  Place  in  the  Courfe  of  Events,  and  have  a 
real  and  evident  Foundation  in  Fa£f, 

Many  Joand  m//7/ confound  Things,  blend  all  together,  and 
hy,  'Tis  all  alike  j  Uii  all  of  thefam$  Sort,     So  there  arc  many 

that 


0»  ih  freceeding  Memoirs.'  \g^ 

that  fay  concerning  the  Reh'gion  moft  generally  prevailing 
among  the  Separati/fs^  and  the  AfFedtions  they  manifeft,  '77i 
the  jamt  that  was  all  over  the  Land /even  Yean  ago.  And  fome 
that  have  read  Mr.  5rtf/«^r^'s  Journal, giving  an  Account  of  the 
extraordinary  Things  that  have  come  to  pafs  among  ihtlndians 
in  New-Jerfeyy  fay,  *Tis  evidently  the  fame  Thing  that  appeared 
in  many  Places  among/i  /^^Englifh,  which  has  now  proved  naughty 
end  come  to  that  which  is  worfe  than  nothing.  And  all  the  Reafon 
they  have  thus  to  determine  all  to  be  the  fame  Wotk^  and  the. 
fame  Spirit,  is,that  the  one  manifefted  highAfFe(S!ions,  and  fodo 
the  other ;  the  great  AfFedions  of  the  one  had  fome  Influence 
on  their  Bodies,  and  fo  have  the  other;  the  one  ufe  the  Terms 
Convi5iionyConverfion,  Humiliation^Comihg  to  Chri/i ^Difcoveries^ 
Experiences,  &c.  and  fo  do  the  other  ;  the  Impreffions  on  the 
one  are  attended  with  a  great  deal  of  Zeal,  and  fo  it  is  witb 
the  other  ;  the  AfFetStions  of  the  one  difpofe  'em  to  fpeak 
much  about  Things  of  Religion,  and  fo  do  the  other  ;  the  one 
delight  much  in  religious  Meetings,  and  fodo  theother.— - 
The  Agreement,  that  appears  in  thefe,  and  fuch  like  Things, 
make  'em  conclude,  thatfurely  all  is  alike, all  is  the  fame  Work. 
Whereas, on  a  cloferlnfpedlion  &criticalExamination,it  would 
appear,  that  notwithftandmg  an  Agreement  in  fuch  Circum- 
ftances,  yet  indeed  there  is  a  vaft  DifFerence,  both  in  Effence 
and  Fruits,  A  confiderable  Part  of  the  religious  Operations, 
that  were  fix  or  fevenYears  ago,erpecially  towards  the  latterPart 
of  that  extraordinary  Seafon,  was  doubtlefs  of  the  fame  Sort 
with  the  Religion  of  ih^Separahfis  ;  but  not  all :  There  were 
many,  whofe  Experiences  were,  like  Mr.  Brainerd*s^'m  ajudg- 
ment  of  Charity,    genuine  and  inconteftible. 

Not  only  do  theOppofers  of  all  Religion  confifting  in  power- 
ful Operations  and  AfFedions,  thus  confound  Things  ;  but 
many  of  thePretenders  to  fuch  Religion  do  fo.  They  that  have 
been  theSubje6ls  of  fome  fort  of  vehement,but  vain  Operations 
on  their  Mind,  when  they  hear  the  Relation  of  the  Experi- 
ences of  fome  real  and  eminent  Chriftians,  they  fay,Their  Ex- 
periences are  of  the  fame  fort  :  So  they  fay,  they  are  juft  like 
the  Experiences  of  eminentChriftians  in  former  Times, which 
we  have  printed  Accounts  of.  So,  I  doubt  not,  but  there  are 
many  deluded  People,  if  they  (liould  read  thepreceeding  Ac- 
count of  Mr.  Brainerd's  Life,  who  reading  without  much  Un- 
derftanding,  or  careful  Obfervation,  would  fay,  without  Hefi- 
tation,  that  fomeThings  which  they  have  met  with,  are  of  the 
very  fame  Kind  with  what  he  cxpreiTes :  When  the  Agreement 

is 


294  Reflexions  and  Obfcrvations 

is  only  in  fomc  generalCircumftances,or  fomcparticuIarThlngi 
that  are  fupcrficial,  and  belonging  as  it  were  to  the  Profeffion 
anc.  Out-fide  o(  Religion  ;  but  the  inward  Temper  of  Mind 
and  the  Fruits  in  Practice,  are  as  oppolite  and  dlAant  asEaft 
and  Welt. 

Many  hone/} good? co^\c  alfo,  and  trut  Chrijilansy  don't  very 
well  know  how  to  make  a  Difference.    The  gliftering  Appear- 
ance and  glaring  Show    of  falfe  Religion  dazzles  their  Eyes  ; 
and  they  fometimes  are    foi  deluded   by   it,  that  they  look  on 
fome  of  thefe  Jmpreflions,   which  Hypocrites  tell  of,  as  the 
brighteft   Expeiiences.     And  tho'  they  have  experienced  no 
fuchThings  themfcivcs,they  think,  it  is  becaufe  they  are  vaftly 
lower  in  Attainments,  and  but  Babes,  in  Comparifon  of  thefe 
flaming  Chriftians.     Yea,  fometimei   from   their  differing  fo 
much  from  thofe  who  make  fo  great  a  Show,  they  doubt  whe- 
ther they  have  any  Grace  at  all.     And  it  is  a  hard  Thing,  to 
bring  many  well-meaning  People  to  make  proper  Diftin6lions 
in  this  Cafe  ;  and  efpecially   to  maintain   and    ftand  by  'em  ; 
through   a    certain    Weaknefs    they   unhapply    labour    of, 
whereby  they  are    liable  to  be  overcome  wiih  the  Glare  of 
outward  Appearances.     Thus,  if  in  a  fedate  Hour  they  are 
hy  Reafoning  brought  to  allow  fuchand  fuch  Diftindtions,  yet 
the  next  Time  they  come  in  the  Way  of  the  great  Show  of  falfe 
Religion,   the  dazzling  Appearance   fwallows  them  up,  and 
they  are  carried   away.     Thus  the  Devil,   by    his   cunning 
Artifices,  eafily  dazzles  the  feeble  Sight  of  Men,  and  puts  'em 
beyond  a  Capacity  of  a  proper  Exercife  of  Confideration,  or 
hearkning  to  theDidates  of  calmThought  &  cuol  Unt  erltand- 
ing.      When  they  perceive  the  great  Affection,  earneft  Talk, 
ftrong  Voice,  affured  Looks,  vaft  Confidence, and  boldAfferti- 
onsj'of  thefe  empty  affuming  Pretenders,    they   are  over- born, 
lofe  the    Poffeffion  of   their   Judgment,  and  fay.    Surely  thefi 
Jlhn  ere  in  theRight,  God  is  with  'em  of  a  Truth  :  and  fo  they 
are  carried  away,  not  with  Light  and  Reafon,  but  (  like  Chil- 
dren) as  it  were  with  a  flrong  Wind. 

This  confounding  all  Things  together,that  have  a  fair  Shew, 
is  but  ading  the  Partof  aChild,  that  going  into  a  Shop,where 
a  variety  of  Wares  are  expofed  to  Sale  (all  of  a  (hining  Ap- 
pearance ;  fomeVelTels  of  Gold  and  Silver,  and  fomcDiamonds 
and  other  precious  Stones ;  and  other  Things  that  are  Toys 
of  IjttleValue  ;  which  are  of  fome  bafe  Metal  gilt,orGlafs  po- 
lifhed,  and  painted  with  curiousColours,  or  cut  likeDiamonds) 
fibould  efteem  all  alike,  and  give  u  great  a  Price  for  the  vile  as 

foe 


On  the  preceeding  Memoirs  J  205 

for  the  pfeeious  :  Or  'tis  like  the  Conduct  of  fome  unflcilful 
raft  Perfon,  who  finding  himfelf  deceived  by  fome  o/theWarca 
be  had  bought  at  that  Shop,  fliould  at  once  conclude,  all  he 
there  faw  was  of  no  Value  ;  and  purfuanf  to  fuch  aConelulion, 
when  afterwards  he  has  true  Gold  and  Diamonds  offered  him, 
enough  to  enrich  him  and  enable  him  to  live  like  a  Prince  all 
his  Days,  he  (hould  throw  it  all  into  the  Sea. 

But  we  mu/i  get  into  another  Way.  The  want  of  diftlij- 
guifhing  in  Things  that  appertain  to  experimental  Religion,  is 
one  of  the  chief  Miferies  of  the  profeffing  World.  'Tis  at- 
tended with  very  many  moft  difmal  Confcquences :  Multi« 
tudes  of  Souls  are  fatally  deluded  about  themfelves,  and  their 
own  State;  and  foare  eternally  undone  :  Hypocrites  are  con- 
firmed in  their  Delufions,  and  exceedingly  puffed  up  with 
Pride  :  Many  fincere  Chriftians  are  dxeadfully  perplexed^ 
darkened,  tempted,  and  drawn  afide  from  the  Way  of  Duty  ; 
and  fometimes  fadly  tainted  with  fajfe  Religion,  to  the  great 
Difhonour  of  Chriftianity,aod  Hurt  of  their  own  Souls  :  fome 
of  the  molt  dangerous  and  perniciousEnemies  ofReiigion  in  the 
World  (  tho'  called  bright  Chriftians  )  are  encouraged  and 
honoured  ;  who  ought  to  be  difcountenanced  and  fhun'd  by 
every  Body  :  And  Prejudices  are  begotten  and  confirmed  in 
vaft  Multitudes,  againft  every  Thing  wherein  the  Power  and 
EfTence  of  Godlinefs  confifts  ^  and  in  iheEnd  Deifm^&Atheifni 
are  promoted. 

III.  The  foregoing  Account  of  Mr,  Braimrd's  Life  may 
afford  Matter  of  Convidlion,  that  there  is  indeed  fuch  aThing 
as  true  experirmntal  Religion^  arifing  from  immediate  divine 
Influences, fupernaturally  eqlightning  and  convineingtheMind, 
and  powerfully  imprefEng,  quickening,  fandlifying,  and  go- 
verning theHeart  ;  which  Religion  is  indeed  an  amiableThing, 
of  happy  Tendency,  and  of  no  hurtful  Confequence  to  human 
Society  ;  notwithftanding  there  having  been  fo  many  Pretences 
and  Appearances  of  what  is  called  experimental  vital  Re- 
ligion, that  have  proved  to  be  nothing  but  vain,  pernicious 
Enthu/tafm, 

If  any  infift,  that  Mr.  Brainerd*s  Religion  was  Enthujiafm^ 
and  nothing  butaftrange  Heat  and  blind  Fervour  of  Mind,, 
arifing  from  the  ftrong  Fancies  and  Dreams  of  a  notional 
whimfical  Brain  ;  I  would  alk,  if  it  be  fo,  that  fuch  Things  as 
thefe  are  the  Fruits  of  Enthufiafm,  viz,  a  great  Degree  ©£ 
Honefty  and.Simj^licity,fincere  and  earneft  Defircs  !»ndEndea*( 
0.4  VQUrt 


296  Rcfle(5lions  and  Obfervations 

vour9,  to  know  and  do  whatever  is  right,  and  to  avoid  every 
Thing  that  is  wrong  ;  an  high  Degree  of  Love  to  God,  De- 
light ill  ihe  ^-'erfeitions  of  his  Nature,  placing  the  Happinefs 
0/  Life  in  him  ;  not  only  in  contemplating  him,  but  in  being 
active  in  plcaiing  and  ferving  him  ;  a  firm  and  undoubting 
Belief  in  the  Mejfiah^  as  the  Savi  jur  of  the  World,  the  great 
Prophet  of  God,  and  King  of  God's  Church  ;  together  with 
great  Love  to  him.  Delight  and  Complacence  in  the  Way  of 
Salvation  by  him,  and  longing  for  theEnlargement  of  hisKing- 
dom  ;  earntft  Defires  that  God  may  be  glorified  and  the 
J{Jej[ftah^^  Kingdom  advanced,  whatever  Inftrumcnts  are  made 
ufe  of;  uncommon  Refignation  to  the  Will  of  God,  and  that 
under  vaft  Trials  ;  great  and  univerfal  Benevolence  to  Man- 
kind, reaching  all  Sorts  of  Pcrfons  without  Diftindlion,  mani- 
fcfted  in  Sweetnefs  of  Speech  and  Behaviour, kind  Treatment, 
Mercy,  Liberality,  and  earneft  feeking  the  Good  of  the  Souls 
and  Bodies  of  Men  ;  attended  with  extraordinary  Humility* 
Meeknefs,Forgiveners  of  Injuries, and  Love  to  Enemies  ;  and 
a  greatAbhorrence  of  a  contrary  Spirit  andPra6tice  ;  not  only 
as  appearing  in  others,  but  whereinfoever  it  had  appeared  in 
himfelf;  caufing  the  moft  bitter  Repentance,  and  Brokennefs 
of  Heart  on  Account  of  any  paft  Inftances  of  fuch  a  Conduct : 
A  modeft,  difcreet  &  decentDeportment,  among  Superiours, 
Inferiours  and  Equals ;  a  moft  diligent  Improvement  ofTime, 
and  earneft  Care  to  lofe  no  Part  of  it  ;  great  Watchfulnefa 
againft  all  Sorts  of  Sin,  of  Heart,  Speech,  and  Action:  And 
this  Example  and  thefe  Endeavours  attended  with  moft  happy 
Fruits,  and  blefiedEfFeds  on  others,  in  humanizing,  civilizing, 
and  wonderfully  reforming  and  transforming  fome  of  the  moft 
brutifh  Savages  ;  Idle,  Immoral,  Drunkards,  Murderers, grofs 
Idolaters,  andWizards  ;  bringing  them  to  permanentSobriety, 
Diligence,  Devotion, Honefty,  Confcientioufnefs,  andCharity  : 
And  the  foregoiog  amiable  V^irtues  and  fuccefsful  Labours  all 
ending  at  laft  in  a  rr.arvcllousPeace,unmoveableStability,Calm- 
nefs,  and  Refignation,  in  the  fcnfible  Approaches  of  Death  ; 
witb  Longing  for  theHeavenlyState  ;  not  only  for  theHonours 
and  circumli:2ntial  Advantages  of  it, but  above  all  for  the  moral 
PerfccSlion,  and  holy  and  blelTedEmpIoyments  of  it  :  And  thefe 
Things  in  a  Perfun  indifputably  of  good  Underftanding  and 
Judgment  :  I  fay,  if  all  thefe  Things  are  the  Fruits  of  Enihu- 
fiafm^  why  ^^ould  not  Enthujkfm  be  thought  a  dcfirable  and 
excellent  Thing  ?  For  what  can  true  Religion,  what  can  the 
bcft  Philcfophy  do  jnxe:    If  Vapours  and  Whiffy  will  bring 

Men 


On  the  preceeding  Memoirs.  297 

Men  to  the  moft  thorough  Virtue,  to  the  moft  benign  and 
fruitfulMorality  ;  and  will  maintain  it  through  aCourfe  ofLifc 
(  attended  with  many  Trials )  without  AjfFe6tation  or  Self- Ex- 
altation,and  with  an  carneft  conftant  bearingTeftimony  againft 
the  Wildnefs,  the  Extravagances,  the  bitter  Zeal,  afTuming 
Behaviour, &  feparating  Spirit  of  Enthufiafts  ;  &  will  do  all  this 
more  efFe6lually,than  anyThing  eife  has  ever  done  in  any  plain 
knowEj  Jnftance  that  can  be  produced  ;  if  it  be  fo,  I  fay,  what 
Caufe  then  has  the  World  to  prize  and?  pray  for  this  blefTed 
VVhimficalnefs,  and  thefe  benign  Sort  of  Vapours  ? 

It  would  perhaps  be  aPiejudice  with  fome  againft  the  whole 
of  Mr.  Brainerd's  Religion,  if  it  had  begun  in  the  Time  of 
the  iate  religious  Commotion  ;  being  ready  to  conclude  (how- 
ever unreafonably  )  that  nothing  Good  could  take  it's  Rife 
from  thofe  Times,  But  it  was  not  fo ;  his  Conveifion  was 
before  thofe  Times,  in  a  Time  of  general  Deadnefs  ( as  has 
been  before  obferved  )  and  therefore  at  a  Sealbn  when  it 
was  impofliblcthat  he  (hould  receive  aTaint  from  any  corrupt 
Notions,Examples,orCuftom3,that  hadBirth  in  thofeTimes. 

And  whereas  there  are  many  who  are  not  profefled  Oppofers 
of  what  is  called  experimmtalReligion^vfnQ  yet  doubt  of  the  Re- 
ality of  it,  from  the  bad  Lives  of  romeProfeiFors  ;  and  are  ready 
to  determine  that  there  is  nothing  in  all  the  Talk  about  being 
born  a^ain^  being  emptied  of  Self^  brought  toa  faving  Clofewith 
Chri/i,  &c.  becaufe  many  that  pretend  to  thefe  Things,  and 
are  thought  by  others  to  have  been  the  Subje(Sls  of  'em,manifeft 
no  abiding  Alteration  in  their  moral  Difpolition  and  Behaviour; 
are  as  carelcfs, carnal, coveteous,^*^^.  as  ever  5  yea,  fome  much 
worfe  than  ever  :  It  is  to  be  acknowledged  and  lamented,  that 
this  is  the  Cafe  with  fome  ;  but  by  the  preceeding  Account 
ihey  may  be  fenfible,that  it  is  not  fo  with  all.  There  are  fome 
indifputable  Inftances  of  fuch  aChange,  as  the  Scripture  fpeaks 
of  ;  an  abiding  great  Change,  a  Renovation  of  the  Spirit  of  ihi 
Mind^  and  ,a  Walking  in  Newmfs  of  Life,  In  the  foregoing 
Inftance  particularly,  they  may  fee  the  abiding  Influence  of 
fuch  a  Work  of  Converfion,  as  they  have  heard  of  from  the 
Word  of  GOD  ;  the  Fruits  of  fuch  Experiences  through 
a  Courfe  of  Years  ;  under  a  great  Variety  of  Circumffances, 
many  Changes  of  State,  Place,  and  Company  \  and  may  fee 
the  blefled  Iffue  and  Event  of  it  in  Life  and  Death. 

%' 
IV.  The  preceedingHiftory  ferves  to  confirm  thofeDodlrines 
afually  called    tht  DoSirines  of  Grace,     For  if   it  be  allowed 
0.9  2  that 


298  Rcfle6kions  and  Obfervations 

that  (here  is  Truth,  Subftance,  or  Value  in  the  main  of  Mr. 
Bralntrd'n  Religion,  it  will  undoubtedly  foil' w, that  thofe  Doc- 
trines are  divine  :  Since 'tis  evident,  that  the  wh-^ie  of  it,  from 
Beginning  to  End,  is  according  to  that  .scheme  r  *  Things  ;  all 
built  on  thole  Apprehcnfions,  Notions,  and  Vjews,  that  arc 
produced  and  cftablifhed  in  the  Mmd  by  hofe  Dodtrines,  He 
was  brought  by  Doctrines  of  this  Kind,  to  his  Awakening,  and 
deep  Concern  aboui  Things  ot  a  fpintual  and  eternal  Nature  i 
and  by  thefe  Dodrines  his  Convictions  were  maintained  and 
carried  on  ;  and  hisConverfun  was  evidently  altogether  agree- 
able to  this  Scheme,  but  by  no  Means  agreeing  with  the  con- 
trary $  and  utterly  inconfiftent  with  the  jirminian  Notion  of 
Converfion  or  Rf.pentAPCe.  HisConverfion  was  plainly  found- 
ed in  a  c^ear  ftrong  Convidion,  and  undoubting  Ferfwafton 
of  the  Truth  oF  th-^fe  Things  appertaining  to  thefe  Doctrines, 
which  Armtnians  moit  objcid  againft,  and  which  his  own  Mind 
had  contended  molt  about.  And  bis  Converfion  was  no  con- 
firming and  perfecting  of  moral  Principles  and  Habits,  byUfe 
and  Pra£lice,  and  his  own  Libour  in  an  induftrious  difciplinr 
ing  himfelf,  together  with  the  concurring  Suggeftions  and  con- 
spiring Aids  of  GOD'S  Spirit  :  But  entirely  a  fupernatural 
Work,  at  once  turning  him  fromDarknefs  to  marveliousLight, 
and  from  the  Power  ^t  Sin  to  theDominion  of  divine  and  holy 
Principles  ;  an  EfFedl,  in  no  Regard  produced  by  his  Strength 
or  Labour,  or  obtained  by  his  Vertue  ;  and  not  aocomplifh'd 
'till  he  was  firft  brought  to  a  full  Convi6lion  that  all  his  own 
Vertue,  Strength,  Labours,  and  Endeavours  could  never  avail 
any  Thing  to  the  producing  or  procuring  this  EfFe6t. 

Avery  little  while  before,  his  Mind  was  full  of  the  fame 
Cavils  againft  theDodrines  of  GOD's  Sovereign  Grace, which 
are  made  by  Arminiam  ;  And  his  Heart  full  even  of  a  raging 
Oppofition  to  'em.  AndGOD  was  pleafed  to  perform  this  good 
Work  in  him  juft  after  a  fuIlEnd  had  been  put  to  this  Cavilling 
andOppofition;  after  he  wasentirely  convinced, that  he  was  dead 
in  Sin,  and  was  in  the  Haiuls  of  GOD,  as  the  abfolutely  fovc 
reign,  unobliged,  fole  Difpofer  and  Author  of  true  Holinefs. 
GOD's  (liewing  himMercy  at  fuch  a  Time, is  a  Confirmation, 
that  this  was  aPreparation  forMercy ;  &  confequentIy,that  thefe 
Things  which  he  was  convinced  of,  were  true  :'  While  heop- 
pofed  thefe  Things,  he  was  the  Subject  of  no  fuch  Mercy  j 
tho'  he  fo  earnefily  fought  it,  and  prayed  for  it  with  fo  much 
Painfuinefs,  Care  and  Striflnefs  in  Religion  :  But  when  once 
his  OppoUtioa  is  fully  fubdued^  and  he  is  brought  to  fubmit  to 

the 


Oh  the  preceding  Memoirs;  299 

the  Truths,  which  he  before  had  oppofed,with  full  Conviaion, 
then  the  Mercy  he  fought  for  is  granted,  with  abundant  Light, 
great  Evidence  and  exceeding  Joy,  and  he  reaps  the  fweetFruifc 
0/  it  all  his  Life  after,&  in  the  Valley  of  the  Shadow  of  Death. 
In  his  Converfion,  he  was  brought  to  fee  the  Glory  of  that 
Way  of  Salvation  by  Chrift,   that  is  taught  in  what  are  called 
the  Do£irines  of  Grace  ;  and  thence-forward,  with  unfpeakable 
Joy  and  Complacence,-  to  embrace  and  acquiefce  in  that  Way 
of  Salvation.     He  was  in  his  Converfion,  in  all  Refpe6ls,  bro't 
to  thofe  Views,  and  that  State  of  Mind,  which  thereDo6lrines 
(hew  to  be  neceflary.   And  if  his  Converfion  was  any  realCon- 
veriion,  or  any  Thing  befides  a  meer  Whim,  and  if  the  Reli- 
gion of  his  Life  was  any  Thing  elfe  but  a  Series  of  Freaks  of  a 
whimfieal  Mind,  then  this  one  grand  Principle,    on  which  de- 
pends the  whole  Difference  between  Calvini/fi  and  Arminians^ 
is  undeniable,  v/z.  That  the  Grace  or  Vertue  of  truly  good 
Men,  not  only  differs  from  the  Vertue  of  others  r«  D^jr^f, but 
even  in  Natun  and  Kind*     U  ever   Mr.  Brainerd  was  truly 
turned  from  Sin  to  GOD  at  all,  or  ever  became  truly  Religi- 
ous, none  can  reafonably  doubt  but  that  his  Converfion  was  at 
the  Time  when  he  fuppofed   it  to  be  :  The  Change  he  then 
experienced, was  evidently  the  greateft  moral  Change, that  ever 
he  pafs'd  under  ;  and   he  was  then  apparently  firft  brought  to 
that  Kind  of  Religion,  that  remarkable  newHabit  andTemper 
of  Mind,  which  he  held  all  his  Life  after.     The  Nii  ration 
fhews  it  to  be  different,  in  Nature  and  Kind^  from  all  that  ever 
he  was  the  Subjed   of  before.     It  was  evidently  wrought   at 
once,  without  fitting  and  preparing  his  Mind, by  gradually  con- 
vincing it  more  and  more  of  the  fame  Truths,  and  bringing  it 
nearer  and  nearer  to  fuch  aTemper :  For  it  was  foon  after  his 
Mind  had  been  remarkably  full  of  Blafphcmy,  and  a  vehement 
Exercife  of  fenfible  Enmity  againft  God,  and  great  Oppofition 
to  thofe  Truths,  which  he  was  now  brought  with  his  whole 
Soul  to  embrace,  and  refl   in,  as  divine  and  glorious,   and  to 
place  hisHappinefs  in  the  Contemplation  and  Improvement  of. 
And  he  himfelf  (who  wasfurely  befl  able  tojudge)declare5,that 
the  Difpofitions  and  AfFeftions,  which  were  then  given  him, 
and  thence-forward  maintained  in  him,  were  moft  fenfibly  and 
certainly,   perfectly  different,   in  their  Nature^    from  all  that 
ever  he  was  the  Subje6l  of  before,  or  that  he  ever  had  any  Con- 
ception of.  This  he  ever  ftood  to  &  was  peremptory  in  (as  what 
he  certainly  knew j  evea  to  hisDeath.     He  mufl  be  looked  upon 
as  capable  of  judging  3  he  had  OppoHuriity  to  know :  He  had 

pradVifeil 


^00  Reflexions  and  Obfcrvations 

pra£tifecl  a  great  deal  of  Religion  before,  was  exceeding  ftrift 
and  confcientious,  and  had  continued  i'o  for  a  long  Time  ; 
had  various  religious  AfFedions,  with  which  he  often  flattered 
himfelf,  and  fometimes  pleafed  himfelf  as  being  now  in  a  good 
Eftate:  And  after  he  had  thofe  new  Experiences,  that  began 
in  his  Converfion,  they  were  continued  to  the  End  of  hisLife; 
long  enough  for  him  thoroughly  to  obferve  their  Nature,  and 
compare  *em  with  what  had  been  before.  Doubtlefs  he  was 
compos  mentis  ;  and  was  at  leafl  one  of  fo  good  an  Underftand- 
ing  and  Judgment,  as  to  be  pretty  well  capable  of  difcerning 
and  comparing  the  Things  that  pafTed  in  his  own  Mind. 

'Tis  further  obfervable,  that  his  Religion  all  along  operated 
in  fuch  aManner  as  tended  to  confirm  hisMind  in  theDo(Strines 
pf  G9d*s  abfolute  Sovereignty,  Man's  univerfai  and  intire  De- 
pendance  on  God's  Power  and  Grace,  i^c.  The  more  his  Re- 
iigion  prevailed  in  his  Heart,  and  the  fuller  he  was  of  divine 
Love, and  of  clear  and  delightful  Views  of  fpiritual  Things,and 
the  more  his  Heart  was  engaged  in  God's  Service  ;  the  more 
fenfible  he  was  of  the  Certainty  ^^nd  theExcellency  and  Impor- 
tance of  thefc  Truths,  and  the  more  he  was  afi^'ecled  with  them 
and  rejoyced  in  them.  And  he  declares  particularly,  that 
v;hen  he  lay  for  a  long  while  on  theVerge  of  die  eternal  World, 
often  expciling  to  be  in  that  World  in  a  fewMinutes,yet  at  the 
fame  Time  enjoying  great  Serenity  of  Mind,  and  Clearnefs  of 
Thought,  and  being  moft  apparently  in  a  peculiar  Manner  at 
a  Diftance  from  an  cnthufiaftical  Frame,  he  at  that  Time  Jaw 
ckarly  theTruth  of  thofe  great  Do  brines  of  theGofpel, which  are  juj'tly 
filled  the  Dodlrines  of  Grace,  and  never  felt  hunj  elf  fo  capable  cf 
demonfirating  the  Truth  of  them. 

So  that 'tis  very  evident,  Mr.  5rfl/«^r^*s  Religion  was  wholly 
corrcfpondent  to  what  is  called  the  Calvinijiical  Scheme^  and 
was  the  EtR-d  of  thofe  Doctrines  applied  to  his  Heart  :  And 
certainly  it  cannot  be  donied,  that  the  £11*^61   was  good,  unlefs 

we  turn  Athcilts,  or  Dcilts. I  would  afk,  whether  there 

beany  fuch  Thing,  in  Reality,  as  Chrifiian  Devotion  ? —  If 
there  be,  what  is  it  ?  What  is  its  Nature  ?  And  what  its 
jufl  Meafure  ?  Should  it  not  be  in  a  great  Degree  i*  We  read 
abundantly  in  Scripture,  of  loving  God  with  all  the  Hearty  with 
oil  the  Soul,  with  all  the Mind^and  with  all  the  Strength,  of  De- 
lighting in  God,  of  Rejoycing  in  the  Lord,  Rejoycing  with  Joy 
unfpeakiible  and  full  of  Glory,  th^  Soul's  Magnifying  theLord^ 
Tbirfiing  for  God,  Hungring  and  Thirfiing  after  Righteoufnefs^ 
the  Soui's  breaking  fir  the  Lunging  it  hath  to  God's  Judgments^ 

Praying 


On  the  precetdfffg  Memoirs.  30 1 

Praying  to  God  with'firean'wgs  that  cannot  be  uttered^   Mourning 
for  Sin  with  a  broken  Heart  and  contrite  Spirit,  Sec,  How  full 
is  the  Book  of    Pfalms,  and  other  Parts  of  Scripture,  of  fuch 
Things  as  thefe  I  Now  wherein  do  thefe  Things,  as  exprefsM 
by  and  appearing  in  Mr.5ra/«^!r^,either  theThings  themfelves, 
or  their  Effects  and,  Fruits,  differ  from  the  Scripturc-Repre- 
fentaticns?  Thefe  Things  he  was  brought  to  by  that  ftrange 
and  wonderful  Transformation  of  the  Man,  which  he  called 
his  Converfion.  And  don't  this  well  agree  with  what  is  fo  often 
faid,  in  Old  Teftament  and  New,  concerning  the  giving  of 
a  new  Heart,  creating  a  right  Spirit,  a  being  renewed  in  the  Spi" 
rit  of  the  A^ind.^  a  being  farMified  throughout,   becoming  a  new 
Creature,  Szc  ?   Now  where  is  there  to  be  found  an    Jrminian 
Converfion  orRepcnt2nce,confifting  in  fo  great  and  admirable 
a  Change  ?  Can  the  Jrminians  produce  an  Inftance,  within  this 
Age,  and  To,  plainly,  within  our  Reach  and  View,  of  fuch  a 
Reformation,  fuch  a  Transformation  of  a  Man,  to  Scriptural 
Devotion, Heavenly-Mindednefs,  and  true  Chriftian  Morality, 
in  one  that  before  lived  without  thefe  Things,  on  the  Foot  of 
/^^/rPrinciples,and  through  the  Influence  of  thetrDodtrines  ? 

And  here»  is  worthy  to  be  confidered,  not  only  lheEffe<Sl  of 
Cahini/iical  Doctrines  (  as  they  are  called  )  on  Mr.  Brainerd 
himfelf,  but  alfo  the  Effc6l  of  the  fame  Doctrines,  as  taught 
and  inculcated  by  him,  on  others,  'Tis  abundantly  pretended 
and  afierted  of  late,  that  thefe  Doftrines  tend  to  undermine 
the  very  Foundations  of  all  Religion  and  Morality,  and  to  en- 
ervate and  vacate  all  reafonable  Motives  to  the  Exercife  and 
Practice  of  them,  and  lay  invincible  Stumbling-Blocks  be- 
fore//yfi^/j,  to  hinder  their  embracing  Chriftianity  ;  and  that 
the  contrary  Do£lrines  are  the  fruitfulPrinciples  of  Virtue  and 
Goodnefs,  fet  Religion  on  it*s  right  Bafis,  reprcfent  it  in  aa 
amiable  Light,  give  it's  Motives  their  full  Force,  and  recom- 
mend it  to  the  Reafon  and  common  Senfe  of  Mankind. —  But 
where  can  they  find  an  Inflance  of  fo  great  and  fignal  anEffe6l 
of  their  Dextrine?,  in  bringing  JnfMls^  who  were  at  fuch  a 
Diftance  from  all  that  is  Civil,  HuraanjSober,  Raticnalj  and 
Chriftian,  and  fo  full  of  inveterate  Prejudices  againft  thefe 
Things,  to  fuch  a  Degree  of  Humanity,  Civility,  Exercife  of 
Reafon,  Self-denial,  and  Chriitian  Verrue  ?  Arminians  place 
Religion  in  Moraiiiy  :  Let  them  bring  an  Inftance  of  their 
Doflrines  producing  fuch  aTransformation  of  aPeople  inPoint 
o^Moraiitv.  'Tis  ftrange,  if  the  Alwifc  God  ^o  ordersThings 
ill  his  Providence,  that  icafcnable  a<)d  proper  Aleans,  and  his 

own 


302  Refledlions  and  Obfcrvations 

iwn  MearSjWbich  he  himfelf  has  appointedjfhould  in  no  known  . 
lemarkable  Inftance  be  inftrumental  to  produce  fo  good  an  Ef- 
fedt  ;  anEfFed  fo  agreable  to  his  own  Word  &  Mind,  and  that 
very  Effect  for  which  he  appointed  thefe  excellentMeans  ;  that 
they  fhould  not  be  foSuccefsful,as  thofeMeans  which  are  nothis 
own,  but  very  contrary  to  'em,  and  of  a  contrary  Tendency  j 
Means  that  are  in  themfelves  very  abfurd,  and  tend  to  root  all 
Religion  and  Vertue  out  of  the  World,  to  promote  and  efta- 
blifti  InfiJelityjand  to  lay  an  infuperable  Stumbling- Block  be- 
fore Pagans,  to  hinder  their  embracing  the  Gofpel :  1  fay,  if 
this  be  the  true  State  of  the  Cafe,  'tis  certainly  pretty  won- 
derful, and  an  Event  worthy  of  fome  Attention. 

1  know,  that  many  will  be  ready  to  fay,  Jt  is  too  foon  yet,  to 
glory  in  ihel^yorkythat  has  been  wro'i  among  Mr, Btnineid's  Indians; 
•*Tis  hefl  to  wait  and  fee  the  final  Event  ;  It  may  be,  all  will  come 
to  nothing  by  and  by  ;  To  which  I  anfwer  ( not  to  infift,  that  it 
will  not  follow,  according  to  Jrminian  Principles,  they  arc  not 
iiowtrueChriftians5reallypious&  godly, tho'  they  ^ould  faWawzy 
and  come  to  nothing)  that  I  never  fuppofed,  every  one  of  thofe 
Indians, who  inProfeflion  renounced  their  Heathenifm  &  vifibly 
embraced  Chriftianity,  and  have  had  fome  Appearance  of 
Piety,  will  finally  prove  true  Converts  :  If  two  thirds,  or  in- 
deed one  half  of  'em  (  as  great  a  Proportion  as  there  is  in  the 
Parable  of  the  Ten  Virgins)  fhould  perfevere  ;  it  will  be  fufHci- 
ent  to  (hew  the  Work,  wrought  among  them,  to  have  been 
truly  admirable  and  glorious.  But  fo  much  of  Permanence  of 
their  Religion  has  already  appeared,  as  fhews  it  to  be  (omething 
elfe  befides  an  Indian  Humour  or  good  Mood,  or  any  tranfient 
Effedt  in  the  Conceits, Notions,  and  Affedlions  of  thefe  igno- 
rant People,  excited  at  a  particular  Turn,  by  artful  Manage- 
ment. For  'tis  now  more  than  three  r<?ar/ ago, that  thisWork 
•  began  among  them, and  a  remarkableChange  appear'd  in  many 
cf  them  ;  fince  which  Time  the  Number  o(  vifible  Converts 
has  greatly  increafcd  :  And  by  repeated  Accounts,  from  feve- 
ral  Hands,  they  ftill  generally  perfevere  in  diligent  Religion  and 
ftridl  Venue.  I  think  worthy  to  be  here  inferted,  a  Letter  from 
a  young  Gentleman, a  Candidate  for  the  Minifiry,  one  of  thofe 
before  mentioned,  appointed  by  the  honourable  CommifRoncrs 
in^^^»,as  Miflionaries  to  theHeathen  of  the  Six  Nations,  fo 
caDcd  ;  who,  by  their  Order,  dwelt  with  Mr.  John  Srainerdy 
among  thefe  Chriftian  Indians,  in  order  to  their  being  prepared 
for  the  Bufinefs  of  their  Million.  The  Letter  was  written 
from  thence,  to  his  Parents  here  in  NoTtb^rr.ptonM  is  as  follows. 

Bithtl^ 


On  the  preceedifjg  Memoirs.'  goi 

Bethdy  in  New-Jerfey,  Jan.  14.  1747,8. 
Honoured  and  dear  Parent?, 
*«  A  Fter  a  long  and   uncomfortable  Journey,  by  Reafon  of 
*^^   "  bad  Weather,  I  arrived  at  Mr.  Brainerd'^,  the  6th 
<'  of  this  Inftant;  where  I  defign  to  ftay  this  Winter:   And 
*«  as  yet,   upon  many  Accounts,  am  well    (atisfied  with  my 
*'  coming  hither.     The  State  and   Circumftsnces  of  the  In- 
*'  dians,  fpiritual  and  temporaKmuch  exceed  what  I  expelled. 
*'  I  have  endeavoured  to  acquaint  my  felf  with  the  State  6i 
*'   the /«^/fl«j  in  general,  with  particular  Perfons,   and  with 
*'  the  School  5  as  much  as  the  fliort  Time  1  have  been  here 
<«  would  admit  of.     And   notwithftanding   my  Expectations 
*«  were  very  much  raifed,  from  Mr.  David  Brainerd's  Jour- 
*'  nal,  and  from   particular  Informations  from   him;  yet  I 
<«  muft  confefs,  that  in  many  Refpedls,  they  are  not  equal  to 
*'  that  which  now   appears  to   me  to  be  true,  concerning  the 
««  glorious  Work  of  divine  Grace  amongft  the  Indians, 

«•  The  Evening  after  I  came  to  Town,  I  had  Opportunity 
<«  to  fee  the  Indians  together,  whilft  the  Rev.  Mr.  Arthur 
<«  preach'd  to  them  :  At  which  Time  there  appeared  a  very 
*'  general  and  uncommon  Serioufnefs  and  Solemnity  in  the 
<«  Congregation  :  And  this  appear'd  to  me  to  be  the  EfFect 
<«  of  an  inward  Senfe  of  the  Importance  of  divine  Truths, 
<«  and  not  becaufe  they  were  hearing  a  Stranger  :  Which  was 
<«  abundantly  confirmed  to  me  the  next  Sabbath,  when  there 
<«  was  the  fame  devout  Attendance  on  divine  Service,  and  a 
<«  furprizing  Solemnity  appearing  in  the  Performance  of  each 
<«  Part  of  divine  Worfhip.  And  fome,  who  are  hopefully  true 
*«  Chriflians, appear  to  have  been  atthatTime  much  enlivened 
<<  and  comforted  ;  not  from  any  obfervableCommotions  then, 
««  but  from  Converfation  afterwards :  And  others  feem'd  ta 
'«  be  under  preiTing  Concern  for  their  Souls.  I  have  endea- 
<«  voured  to  acquaint  my  felf  with  particular  Perfons ;  many 
««  of  whom  feem  to  be  very  humble  and  growing  Chriflians ; 
*'  altho'  fome  of  them  (  as  I  am  informed )  were  before  their 
<«  Converfion  moft  monftrouflyVVicked.* 

*'  Religious  Converfation  feems  to  be  very  pleafing  and 
<«  delightful  to  many,  and  efpecially  that  which  relates  to 
"  the  Exercifes  of  the  Heart.  And  many  here  don't  feem 
*'  to  be  real  Chriflians  only,  but  growing  Chriflians  alfo  ; 
««  as  well  in  dodlrinal,  as  experimental  Knowledge.  Befides 
**  myConverfation  with  particularPerfons,!  have  hadOppor- 
**  tunity  to  attend  upon  one  of  yii,  ^raingrd'%  catechetical 
R  r        '   ^"^  Le (Surest 


30-4  Reflexions  and  Obfefvations 

««  Le6kure5 ;   where  I  was  furprized  at  their   Readinefs  in 
«'  anfwering  Queftions  which  they  had  not  been  ufed  to  : 
««  Altho'  Mr»Brainerd  complained  much  of  their  uncommon 
<<  Deficiency.     It  is  furprizing,   to  fee  this  People,  who  not 
««  long  fince  were  led  Captive  by  Satan  at  his  Will,   and  liv- 
««  ing  in  the  Pradice  of  all  manner  of  Abominations,  with- 
«'  out  the  leaft  Senfe  even  of  moral  Honefty,  yet  now  living 
««  foberly  and  regularly,  and  not  feeking  every  Man  his  own, 
«<  but  every  Man,  in  fome  Senfe,  his   Neighbour's  Good  ; 
<^  and  to  fee  ihofe,  who  but  a  little  while  paft,  knew  nothing 
««  of  the  true  GOD,  now  worfliipping  Him  in  a  folemn  and 
<«  devout  Manner  ;  not  only  in  publick,    but  in  their  Fami- 
*'  lies  and  in  Secret ;   which  ismanifeftly  the  Cafe;  it  being 
««  a  difficult  Thing  to  walk  out  in  the  Woods  in  theMorn- 
<*  ing,  without  diflurbing  Perfons  at  their  fccret  Devotion. 
«*  And  it  fecms  wonderful,  that  this  fhould  be  the  Cafe,  not 
*«  only  with  adult  Perfons,  but  with  Children  alfo.     It  is  ob- 
««  fervable  here,  that  many  Children  (  if  not   the  Children 
««  in  general)  retire  into  fecret  Places  to  pray.     And,  as  far 
«<  as  at  prefent  I  can  judge,  this  is  not  the  EfFe6t  of  Cuflom 
<«  and  Fafhion,   but  of  real  Serioufnefs  and  Thoughtfulnefa 
««  about  their  Souls. 

*'  I  have  frequently  gone  into  the  School,  and  have  fpent 
<«  confiderable  Time  there  amongft  the  Children  ;  and  have 
«'  been  furprized  to  fee,  not  only  their  diligent  AttencJance 
««  upon  theBufinefs  of  theSchool,but  alfo  the  Proficiency  they 
*«  have  made  in  it,  in  Reading  and  Writing,  and  in  their  Ca- 
*^  techifms  of  divers  Sorts.  It  feems  to  be  as  pleafing  and  as 
«  natural  to  thefe  Children, to  have  th?ir  Boob  in  theirHands, 
««  as  it  does  for  many  others  to  be  at  Play,  I  have  gone  into 
««  an  Koufe  where  there  has  been  a  Number  of  Children  ac- 
*«  cidemally.gathered  together  j  and  obferved,  that  every  one 
*'  hadii^is  Book  in  his  Hand,  and  was  diligently  ftudying  of 
««  it.^  There  is  to  the  Number  of  about  thirty  of  thefe  Chil- 
*«  dren,  who  can  anfwer  tu  all  the  Queftions  in  the  yfjpm- 
<«  bly's  Catecbifm  ;  ^i^  the  bigger  Part  of  them  are  able  to  do 
««  it  with  the /^r^fl/j,  to  the  fourth  Ccmmandment.  I  wifli 
*'  there  were  many  fuch  Schools  :  I  confefs,  that  I  never  was 
*'  acquainted  with  fuch  an  ore,  in  many  Refpeds.  Oh  that 
«*  what  God  has  done  here,  may  prove  to  be  the  Beginning 
*•  of  a  far  more  gloflous  aiid  exteniive  Work  of  Grace  among 
*'  the  H»athen.  '  I  am  your  obedient  ajid  dutiful  Son, 

^  Joh  Strong. 

«  P.  S.  Since 


On  the  proceeding  Memoirs.  305 

<f  P.  S*  Since  the  Date  of  this,  I  have  had  Opportunity  to 
«  attend  upon  another  of  Mr.  5rj;«Ws  catechcticalLedlures: 
<<  ajid  truly  I  was  convinced,  that  Mr.  5r<3/W^did  notcom- 
«  plain  before  of  his  People's  Defe6ls  in  anfwering  toQuefti- 
<«  ons  propofed,  without  Rcafon  :  For  altho*  their  Anfwers 
<«  at  that  Time  exceeded  my  Expedlations  very  much  ;  yet 
*  <  their  Performances  at  this  Lecture  very  much  exceeded 
<«  them.** 

Since  this,  we  have  had  Accounts  from  Time  to  T  me,and 
fome  very  late,  which  fhew  that  Religion  flill  continues  in 
profperous  and  moft  defiiable  Circumftances  among  thefe 
Indians, 

V.  Is  there  not  much  in  thepreceedingMemoIrs  ofMr.Srtf/- 
«^r^to  teach, and  excite  toDuty,u$  who  are  called  to  the  Work 
of  th^MiniJiry^  and  all  that  SLteCandUates  for  that  great  Work?* 
What  a  deep  Senfe  did  he  feem  to  have  of  the  Greatnefs  and 
Importance  of  that  Work,  and  with  what  Weight  did  it  lie 
on  his  Mind  !  How  fenfible  was  he  of  his  own  Infufficiency 
for  this  Work  ;  and  how  great  was  his  Dependance  on  God's 
Sufficiency  !  How  folicitous,  that  he  might  be  fitted  for  it  ! 
And  to  this  End,  how  much  Time  did  he  fpend  in  Prayer  and 
Falling,  as  well  as  Reading  and  Meditation  ;  giving  himfelf 
to  thefe  Things  !  How  did  he  dedicate  his  whole  Life,  all  his 
Powers  and  Talents  to  God  ;  and  forfake  and  renounce  the 
World,  with  all  it's  pleafiagand  enfnaring  Enjoyments,  that 
he  might  be  wholly  at  Liberty,  to  ferve  Chrift  in  this  Work  ; 
and  to  pleafe  him  who  had  chofen  him  to  be  a  Soldier^  under  the 
Captain  of  our  Salvation  !  With  what  Solicitude,  Solemnity, 
and  Diligence  did  he  devote  himfelf  to  God  our  Saviour,  and 
feek  his  Prefence  and  Bleffirig  in  fecret,  at  the  Time  of  his 
Ordination  !  And  how  did  his  whple  Heart  appear  to  be  con- 
ftantly  engaged,  his  whole  Time  employed,  and  his  whole 
Strength  fpent  in  the  Bufmefs  he  then  folemnly  undertook  and 

was  publickly  fet  apart  to  I And  his  Hiftory  (hews  us  the 

right  Way  to  Succefs  in  the  Work  of  the  Miniftry.  He  fuught 
it,  as  a  refolute  Soldier  feeks  Victory,  in  a  Siege  or  Battle  ;  or 
as  a  Man  that  runs  a  Race,  for  a  great  Prize.  Animated  wmi 
Love  to  Chrift  and  Souls,  how  did  he  labour  always  fervently^ 
not  only  in  Word  and  Dodlrine,  in  publick  and  private,  but 
in  Prayers  Day  and  Night,  wrejiling  with  God  in  fecret,  and 
travailing  in  Birth^  with  unutterable  Groans  and  Agonies,  aa- 
til  Chrift  were  formed  in  the  Hearts  of  the  People  to 
R  r  2  whom 


306 


Refleftions  and  Obfervatiohs 


whom  he  was  fent  !  How  did  he  thirft  for  a  Bleffing  on  his 
Miniftry  ;  luid  watch  for  Souls,  as  one  that  mufl  give  Account  ! 
How  did  he  go  forth  in  the  Strength  of  the  Lord  God ;  feeking 
and  depending  on  a  fpecial  Influence  ot  the  Spirit  to  aflift  and 
fucceed  him  !  And  what  was  the  happy  Fruit  at  iait,  though 
after  long  waiting,  and  many  dark  snd  difcouraging  Appear- 
ances !  Like  a  true  Son  of  Jacob,  he  perfevered  in  wreftling, 
through  all  theDarknefs  of  theNight,  until  the  breaking  of  the 
Day. 

And  his  Example  of  labouring, praying, denying  himfelf,anci 
enduring  Hardnefs,  with  unfainting  Refolution  and  Patience, 
and  bis  faithful,  vigilent,and  prudent  Condufl:  in  many  other 
Refpedts  (which  it  would  be  too  long  now  particularly  to  re- 
cite )  may  afford  Inftru61ion  to  Mijftonaries  in  particular, 

•  VI.  The  foregoing  Account  of  Mr.  Brainerd's  Life  may 
afford  Inttru<Stion  to  Chri/rians  in  general ;  as  it  fhewsjn  many 
Refpe6fsj  the  right  Way  of  praSiifing  Religion,  in  order  to 
ob'ainin^  the  Ends  of  it,  and  receiving  the  Benefits  of  it ;  or 
how  Chriftians  fhould  run  the  Race^  jet  before  them,  if  they 
ti'uuld  not  run  in  vain,  or  run  as  uncertainly,  but  would  ho- 
nour God  in  the  World,  adorn  their  Profeffion,  be  Service- 
able to  Mankind,  have  the  Comforts  of  Religion  while  they 
live,  be  free  from  difquieting  Doubts  and  dark  Apprehenfions 
abrout  the  State  of  their  Souls  ;    enjoy  Peace  in  the  Approaches 

of  Death,  and  finijh  their  Courfewith  Joy In  general,  he 

much  recommended,  for  this  Purpofe,  the  Redemption  of  Time^ 
great  Diligence  in  the  Bufifvis  of  the  Chriftian  Life,  fVaichful- 
nefs^  Sec.  And  he  very  remarkably  exemplify'd  thefeThings. 

But  particularly,  his  Example  and  Succefs  with  Regard  to 
one  Duty  in  fpecial,  may  be  of  great  Ufe  to  bothMinifters  and 
private  Chriftians  ;  I  mean,  the  Duty  of  fecret  Fafiinir.  The 
Rcadca*  has  fccn,  how  much  Mr.  i^r^/w^r^  recommends  this 
Dutv;"  and  how  frequently  he  exercifed  himfelf  in  it ;  Nor 
can  it  we-ll  have  efcjp'd  Obfervationjiow  much  he  wasown'd 
and  blefs'd  in  it,  and  of  what  great  Benefit  it  evidently  was  to 
his  Soul.  Among  all  the  many  Days  he  fpent  infecretFafting 
and  Prayer,  that  he  gives  an  Account  of  in  his  Diary ^  there  is 
fcarce  an  Infhnce  of.  one, but  Vvhat  v^as  either  attended  or  foon 
foilov/ed  v/ith  apparent  Succefs,  and  a  remarkable  Blefling, 
i<i  fpecial  Incomes  and  Confolations  of  God's  Spirit  ;  and 
vt»ry  often,  before  the  Day  was  ended.  But  it  muft  be 

obftf  ved,  that  when  he  ki  about  this  Duty,  he  did  it  in  good 

Earngfi  j 


On  the  proceeding  Memoirs;  '^oy 

Earned  ;  fiirring  up  himfelfto  take  hold  o/God^ZTid  continuing 
hjant  in  Prayer,  with  much  of  the  Spirit  of  Jacobs  who 
faid  to  the  Angel,    I  will  net  iet  ihce  go^  except  thou  blefs  me, 

Vlf.  There  is  much  in  the  preceding  Account  to  excite 
and  encourage  God's  People  to  earneft  Prayers  and  Endea- 
vours for  the  ^Advancement  and  Enlargement  of  the  Kingdom  of 
Christ  in  the  fVorld,  Mr.  Brainerdhi  us  an  excellent  Ex- 
ample in  this  Re<*pe6l :  He  fought  the  Profperity  of  Tjton  with 
all  his  Might  :  He  prefer'd  Jerufalem  above  his  chief  Joy. 
How  did  his  Soullong  for  it,  and  pant  after  it  !  And  how 
earneftly  and  often  did  he  wreftle  with  God  for  it  !  And  how 
far  did  he,  in  thefe  Defires  and  Prayers,  i^tm.  to  be  carried 
beyond  all  private  and  felfifh  Views  !  being  animated  by  a 
pure  Love  to  Chrift,  an  earnefl  Defire  of  his  QiXoxy^  and  a 
difinierefted  AfFe£tion  to  the  Souls  of  Mankind. 

The  Confideration  of  this,  not  only  ought  to  be  an  Incitement 
to  the  People  of  God,  but  may  alfo  be  a  juft  Encouragement  to 
'em,     to  be  much  in  feeking  and  praying  for  a  general  Out- 
pouring of  the  Spirit  of  God, and  extenfive  RevivahofReligion. 
1  confefs,  that  God's  giving  fo  much  of  a  Spirit  of  Prayer  for 
this  Mercy  to  fo  eminent  a  Servant  of  his,  and  exciting  him,  in 
fo  extraordinary  a  Manner,  and  with  fuch  vehement  Thirftings 
of  Soul,  to  agonize  in  Prayer  for  it,  fromTime  to  Time,thro' 
the  Courfe  of   his  Life,  is  one  Thing,  r.mong  others,   which 
gives  me  great  Hope,  that  God  has  a  Defiga  of  accomplifhing 
fomething  very  glorious  for  the  Intereft  of  his  Church  before 
long.     One  fuch  Inftance  as  this,  I  conceive,  gives  more  En- 
couragement,   than   the  common,  cold,    formal  Prayers  of 
Thoufands.     As  Mr.  Brainerd*s  Defires  and  Prayers  for   the 
coming ofChrift'sKingdom,  were  very  fpecial and  extraordinary^ 
fo,  I  think,  we  may  reafonably  hope,    that  the  God,  who  ex- 
cited ihofe  Defires  and  Prayers,  will  anfwer  them  with  {otm- 
thing  fpecial  2nd  extraordinary.     And  in  a  particular  Manner, 
do  I  think  it  worthy  to  be  takenNotice  of  for  ourEncouragment, 
that  he  had  his  Heart  (as  he  declared  )  unufually,    and  beyond 
what  had  been  before,  drawn  out  in  Longings  and  Prayers  for 
theFlourifhing  of  Chrift's  Kingdom  on  Earth,  when  he  was  in 
the  Approaches  of  Death  ;  and  that  with  his  dying  Breath  he 
did  as  it  were  breathe  out  his  departing  Soul  into  the  Bofom  of 
hisRedeemer,  in  Prayers  andPantings  after  this  gloriousEvent, 
expiringin  a  very  greatHopethatit  would  foon  begin  to  be  ful- 
fiki»   And  1  wifo,  that  ths  Tho'ts  which  he  in  his  dying  State 

e^prefTe^i 


goS  Reflexions  and  Obfervations 

cxprefled  of  that  explicit  Agreementjand  vifibleUnion  of  God's 
People,  in  extraordinary  Prayer  for  a  general  Revival  of  Reli- 
gion, lately  propofed  in  a  Memorial  from  Scotland^  vvhich  nas 
been  difperfed  among  us,  may  be  wei!  confidered  by  thole  that 

hitherto  have  notfeen  fit  to  fall  in  with  that  Propofal. But 

I  forbear  to  fay  any  more  on  this  Head,  having  alieady  lark,ely 
publifhed  my  Thoughts  upon  it,  in  aDifcourie  w^ritten  onPur- 
pofe  to  promote  that  Affair  ;  which,  I  confers,!  wiih  thai  every 
one  of  myReadersmighr  be  fupplied  with ;  not  that  my  Honour, 
but  that  this  excellent  Defign  m/ght  b©  promoted. 

As  there  is  much  in  Mr.  Brainerd's  Life  to  eocourage  Chri- 
liians  to  feek  the  Advancement  of  Chrift*s  Kingdom,  in  gene- 
jal ;  To  there  is,  in  particular, to  pray  for  the  Converfion  of  the 
Indians  on  this  Continent,  and  to  exert  themfe:v:.'s  in  che  Ufc 
of  proper  Means  for  it's  Accomplifhment.  For  it  appears, 
that  he  in  his  unutterable  Longings  and  Wref^Iings  of  Soul  far 
the  Flourifhing  of  Religion,  had  his  Mind  peculiarly  inten:  on 
the  Converfion  and  Salvation  of  thefe  People,  and  his  Heart 
moreefpecially  engaged  in  Prayer  for  them.  And  if  we  confi- 
der  the  Degree  and  Manner  in  which  he  irom  Time  toTime, 
fought  and  hoped  for  an  extenfiveWork  of  Grace  among  them, 
I  think,  we  have  Reafon  to  hope,  that  the  v^onderful  Thmgs, 
whichGod  wrought  among  them  by  him, are  but  aFore-runner 
of  fomething  yet  much  more  glorious  and  extenfive  of  that 
Kind  ;  and  this  may  juftly  be  an  Encouragement,  to  well- 
difpofed  charitable  Perfons,  to  honour  the  Lord  wiih  their  Sub- 
fiance^  by  contributing,  as  they  are  able,  to  promote  thefpread- 
ing  of  theGofpel  among  them  ;  and  this  alfo  may  incite  and  en- 
courage Gentlemen  who  are  LncorpoiSted,  and  intrufted  with 
the  Care  and  Difpofal  of  thoie  libeial  Benefa«aions,  which  have 
already  been  made  by  piousPerfons,  to  that  End  5  andlikewife 
the  Miffrjoarics  themfelvcs,  thst  are  cr  may  be  employed  ;  and 
it  may  be  01  DirccSlioii  unto  boih,as  to  the  properQualifications 
of  Miffionaries,  and  the  proper  Meafures  to  be  iaken  in  order 
to  their  Succefs. 

One  7>iing  in  particular,  I  would  take  Occnficn  from  the 
foregoing  Hiftory  to  mention  and  propofe  to  the  Confideration 
of  fuch  as  have  the  Care  of  providing  and  fending  MiffiDnaries 
amongSavages  ;  viz.  Whether  it  would  not  ordinarily  be  bcfl 
to  fend  two  together  ?  It  is  pretty  manifeft,  that  Mr.  hrainerd's 
going,  as  hedid,  alone  into  the  howling  Wildernefs,  was  one 
great  Occafion  of  fuch  a  prevailing  of  Melancholy  on  hisMind; 
which  Y/as  his  greateft  Difad  vantage.     He  wai>  much  in  fpeak- 

ing 


On  the  preceeding  Memoirs.'  309 

ing  of  it  himfelfj  when  he  was  here  in  his  dyingState  ;  and  ex- 
pre/Ted  himfclf,  to  this  Purpofe,  that  none  could  conceive  of 
the  Difadvantage  a  Miffionary  in  fuch  Circumftances  was  un- 
der, by  being  alone  ;  efpecially  as  it  expofcd  him  to  Difcou- 
ragement  and  Melancholy  :  And  fpoke  of  theWifdom  ofChrift 
in  fending  forth  his  Difciples  by  Two  and  Two  ;  and  left  it 
as  his  dyinp;Advice  to  his  Brother, never  to  go  to  Sufquahannah^ 
to  travel  about  in  that  remote  VVildcrners,  to  preach  to  the 
Indians  there,  as  he  had  often  done,  without  the  Compsny  of  a 
Fellow-  AJiJfionary. 

VIII.  Gne  Thing  more  may  not  be  unprofitably  obfervcd 
in  the  preceeding  Account  of  Mr.  Brainerd ;  and  that  is  the 
fpecial2ir)d  remarkable  /)///)«^tf2  of  divine  Providence,  with  Re- 
gard to  the  Ci  cumflances'oi  his  laft  Sicknefs  and  Death. 

Tho*  he  had  been  long  infirm,  his  Conftitution  being  much 
broken  by  his  Fatigues  and  Hardfhips  ;  and  tho'  he  was  often 
brought  very  low  by  Illnefs,  before  he  left  Kaunaumeek,  and 
alfo  while  he  lived  at  the  Forks  of  Delaware  :  Yet  his  Life 
was  preferved,  'till  he  had  feen  that  which  he  had  fo  long 
and  greatly  defired  and  fought,  a  glorious  Work  of  Grace 
among  the  Indians^  and  had  received  the  wifhed  for  Bleffingof 
God  on  his  Labours.  Tho*  as  it  were  in  Deaths  cft^  yet  he 
lived  to  behold  the  happy  Fruits  of  the  long  continued  Travail 
of  his  Soul  and  Labour  of  his  Body,  in  the  wonderful  Gonver- 
fion  of  many  of  the  Heathen,  and  the  happy  Ef?e£l  of  it  in  the 
great  Change  of  their  Converfation,  with  manyCircumftances 
which  afforded  a  fair  Profpedi  of  the  Continuance  of  God's 
Bleffing  upon  them  3   as  may  appear  by  what  I  fhali  prefently 

further  obferve Thus   he  did  not  depart^  'till  his  Eyes 

had  feen  God*s  Salvation. 

Tho*  it  was  the  Pieafureof  God,  that  hefhould  betaken 
off  from  his  Labours  among  that  People  whom  God  had  made 
him  a  fpiritual  Father  to,  who  were  {o  dear  to  him, and  whofe 
fpiritual.  Wei  fare  he  was  fo  greatlyconcerned  for  ;  yet  this  was 
not  before  they  were  well  initiated  and  inftru6led  in  the  Cbrif-* 
tian  Religion,  thoroughly  weaned  from  their  old  heathen'ifh 
and  brutifh  Notions  and  PracSlices,  and  all  their  Prejudices  and 
Jealoufies,  which  tended  to  keep  their  Minds  unfettled,  were 
fully  removed  3  and  they  were  confirmed  and  fixed  in  the 
ChriflianFaith  and  Manners,  were  formed  into  a  Church,  had 
ccclefiafticalOrdinances  and  Difcipline  introduced  &  fettled  ; 
were  brought  into  a  good  Way  with  Rerpe6t  to  the  Education 
of  Children^  had  a  Schocl-JVlalkr  fent  to  them  in  Providence, 

excellently 


^  lo  Refledllons  and  Obfervatlons 

excellently  qualified  for  the  Bufinefs,  and  had  a  School  fet  up 
and  eftablifhed,  in  good  Order,  among  them  ;  had  been  well 
brought  ofF  from  their  former  Idle,  ftrolling,  fottifh  Way  of 
Living  j  had  removed  from  their  former  fcattered  uncertain 
Habitations ;  and  were  colleiSled  in  aTovvn  by  themfelves,  on 
a  good  Piece'of  Land  of  their  own  ;  were  introduced  into  the 
Way  of  living  by  Hufbandry,  and  begun  to  experience  the 
Benefits  of  it,  iz^c.  Thefe  Things  were  but  jufl  brought  to 
pafis  by  his  indefatigable  Application  and  Care, and  then  he  was 
taken  off  from  his  Work  by  Illnefs.  If  this  had  been  but  a 
little  fooner,  they  would  by  no  Means  have  been  fo  well  pre- 
pared for  fuch  aDifpenfation  ;  and  it  probably  would  have  been 
unfpeakably  more  to  the  Hurt  of  their  fpiritual  Intereft,  and  of 
the  Caufe  of  Chriftianity  among  them. 

The  Time  and  Circumftances  of  his  Illnefs  were  (o  or- 
dered, that  he  had  juft  Opportunity  to  finifh  his  Journal^  and 
prepare  it  for  the  Prefs ;  giving  an  Account  of  the  marvellous 
Difplay  of  divine  Power  and  Grace  among  ihtlndians  in  New^ 
Jerfey^  and  at  the  Forks  of  Delaware :  His  doing  which  was  a 
Thing  of  great  Confequence,  and  therefore  urged  upon  him 
by  the  Correfpondents^  who  have  honoured  his  Journal  with  a 
Preface.  The  World  being  particularly  and  juftly  informed 
of  that  Affair  by  Mr.  prainerdy  before  hisDeath,  a  Foundation 
was  hereby  laid  for  a  Concern  in  others  for  that  Caufe,  and 
proper  Care  and  Meafures  to  be  taken  for  the  maintaining  it 
after  his  Death.  As  it  has  a6iually  proved  to  be  of  greatlnflu- 
ence  andBencfit  in  thisRefped  ;  it  having  excited  and  engaged 
many  in  thofe  Parts,  and  alfo  more  diltant  Parts  of  Jmerica,  to 
exert  themfelves  for  the  upholding  and  promoting  fo  good  and 
glorious  a  Work,  remarkably  opening  their  Hearts  and  Hands 
to  that  End  :  And  not  only  in  America^  but  in  Great  Britain, 
where  that  Journal  ( which  is  the  fame  that  I  have  earneflly  re- 
commended to  my  Readers  to  poffefs  themfelves  of)  has 
been  an  Occaficn  of  fome  large  Benefadions,  made  for  the 
promotin,^  the  Intereft  ofChriftianity  among  the  Indians,  — '•If 
Mr.  Brainerdh2i^  been  taken  111  but  a  little  fooner,  he  had  not 
been  able  to  compleat  this  his  Journal,  and  prepare  a  Copy  for 
the  Prcfs. 

He  was  not  taken  off  from  the  Work  of  theMiniflry  among 
his  People,  'till  his  Brcther  was  in  a  Capacity  and  Circum- 
ftances  to  fucaed  him  in  hisCare  of  them  :  Who  fucceeds  him 
in  the  like  Spirit,  and  under  whofe  prudent  and  faithful  Care 
bis  Ccrgrcg^tion  l-ai  flcurifhcd,  jnd  been  szxy  h-ppy,  fuicehe 

left 


On  the  preceeding  Memoirs.^  3  1 1 

left  th^m  ;  and  probably  could  not  have  been  (o  well  provided 
for,  otherwifc.  If  Mr.  Brainerd  hid  been  djTabled  fooner,  his 
Brother  would  by  no  Means  have  been  ready  to  ftand  up  in  his 
Flace  ;  having  taken  his  firft  Degree  at  College  but  about 
thL't  very  Time  that  he  was  feiz'd  with  his  fatal  Confump* 
tion. 

Tho*  in  that  VvTinter  that  he  lay  fick  at  Mr.  Dickin[on*s  in 
Eiifabeth-Toivn^  be  continued  for  a  long  Time  in  an  extremely 
low  State,  fo  that  his  Life  was  almoft  defpair'd  of,  and  his 
State  was  fometimes  fuch  that  it  was  hardly  expected  he  would 
live  a  Day  to  an  End  ;  yet  his  Life  was  fpared  a  while  longer  ; 
he  lived  to  fee  his  Brother  arrived  in  New-Jerfey^  being  come 
tofucceed  him  in  theCare  of  his  Indians  ;  and  he  himfelf  had 
Opportunity  to  aflift  in  his  Examination  and  Introdu<Slion  into 
his  Bufmcfs  3  and  to  commit  the  Condud  of  his  dear  People 
to  One  whom  be  well  knew,  and  could  put  Confidence  in,  and 
ufe  PVeedom  with  in  giving  him  particular  Inftrudions  and 
Charges,  and  under  whofe  Care  he  could  leave  his  Congrega- 
tion with  great  Chearfulnefs. 

The  Providence  of  God  was  remarkable  in  fo  ordering  of 
it,  that  before  bis  Death  he  fhould  take  a  Journey  into  New 
Eng/afid,znd  go  to  Bojlon  :  Which  was,  in  many  Refpecls,  of 
very  great  and  happy  Confequence  to  the  Intereft  of  Religion, 
and  efpecially  among  his  own  People.  By  this  Means,  as 
has  been  obferved,  he  was  brought  into  Acquaintance?  with 
many  Perfons  of  Note  and  Influence,  Minifters  and  others, 
belonging  both  to  the  Town  and  varioys  Parts  of  the  Coun- 
try ;  and  had  Opportunity,  under  the  belt  Advantages,  to  bear 
a  Teftimony  for  God  and  true  Religion,  and  againft  thofe  falfe 
Appearances  of  it  that  have  proved  moft  pernicious  to  the 
Interefts  of  Chrifl's  Kingdom  in  the  Land.  And  the  Provi- 
dence of  God  is  particularly  obfervable  in  this  Circumftance 
of  the  Teftimony  he  there  bore  for  true  Religion  ;  viz*  That 
he  there  was  brought  fo  near  the  Grave^  and  continued  for  fa 
\Qn^  a  Time  on  the  very  Brink  of  Eternity  ;  and  from  Time 
to  Time,  look'd  on  himfelf,  and  was  look'd  on  by  others,  as 
juft  leaving  the  World  ;  and  that  in  thefe  Circumfl-afices 
he  fhould  be  fo  particularly  direfled  and  affifted  in  his  Tho'ts 
and  Views  of  Religion,  to  diftinguifh  between  the  true  and 
the  faifc,  with  fuch  Clearnefs  and  Evidence  5  a%d  that  after 
this  he  (liould  be  unexpe£ledly  and  furprizingly  reftored  and 
flrengthned,  fo  far  as  to  be  able  to  ccnverfe  freely  ;  and  have 
fuch  Opportunity,  and  fpecial  Occafions  to  declare  the  Senti* 

S  f  ment^ 


312  Refleftions  and  ObfervatiorJs 

ments  he  had  in  thefe,  which  were,  to  human  Apprehenfion, 
his  dying  Circumftances  ;  and  to  bear  his  Teftimony  concern- 
ing the  Nature  of  true  Rchgion,  and  concerning  the  mlfchic- 
vous  Tendency  of  it's  moft  prevalent  Counterfeits  and  falfe 
Appearances  ;  as  Things  he  had  a  fpecial, clear,  diflin<5tView 
of  at  that  Time,  when  he  e5ipe<5led  in  a  few  Minutes  to  be 
in  Eternity  ;  and  the  Certainty  &  Importance  of  which  were 
then,  in  a  peculiar  Manner,  imprels'd  on  his  Mind. 

Among  ihe  happy  Confequences  of  his  going  to  Bo/ion^w&fe 
thofe  liberal  Benefactions  that  have  been  mentioned,  which 
were  made  by  pious  diTpofed  Perfons,  for  the  maintaining  and 
promoting  the  Intereii  of  Religion  among  his  People  :  And 
alfo  the  meeting  of  a  Number  of  Gentlemen  in  Eo/fon,  of  Note 
and  Ability,  toconfult  upon  Meafures  for  that  Purpofe  i  who 
were  excited  by  their  Acquaintance  and  Converfation  with 
lAr.Brainerdy  and  by  the  Account  of  the  greatThings  God  had 
wrought  by  his  Miniflry,  to  unite  themfelves,  that  by  their 
joint  Endeavours  and  Contributions  they  might  promote  the 
Kingdom  of  Chrif^,  and  the  fpiritual  Good  of  their  Fellow- 
Creatures,  among  the  Indians  in  J^ew-'JerJcy^zvi^  el  e where. 

It  was  alfo  remarkable,  that  Mr.  Brainerd  fliould  go  to 
Bo/ion,  at  that  lime  ;  after  rhe  honourable  Commiffioners 
there,  of  the  Corporation  in  London  for  propagating  theGofpel 
ik New-  England  and  Barts  adjacent,  had  received  Dr.  J^Fil- 
liam's  Legacy  for  the  maintaining  of  tv/o  Miffibnaries  amcrig 
ihe  Heathen  ;  and  at  a  Time  when  they  having  concluded  on 
a  Miflion  to  the  Indiam  of  the  Six- Nations  ( lb  called  )  were 
looking  out  for  fit  Perfons  to  be  impioycd  in  that  Important 
Service.  This  proved  anOccafion  of  their  committing  to  him 
the  Affair  of  finding  and  recommending  fuitable  Perlons  : 
Which  has  proved  a  fuccefsful  Means  of  two  Perfons  being 
f  )und  and  a(£!u?Jly  appointed  to  that  Bufinefs ;  who  feem  to 
be  well  quiihfied  for  it,  and  to  have  theirH.-arts  !?reatlv  engased 
in  it  :  One  of  which  has  been  folemnly  ordain'd  to  thatVVork 
in  Soy^oK,  and  is  now  gone  forth  to  one  of  thofe  Tribes,  who 
have  appeued  well-difpofed  to  hisReccption  :  It  beingjud(7ed 
not  convsnicnt  for  the  other  to  go  'till  the  next  Sprine,  by 
Reafon  of  his  bodily  Infirmity.  *  Tbcfe 


The  Appoinfment  of  thefe  Gentlemen  to  thiS  Million 
has  been  hitherto  much  fniilcd  on  in  Providence;  as  in 
other  RqidcOs,  To  pHflicuhrly  la  ihe  woiiderfu!  opening 

of 


On  the  preceeding  Memoirs,  31  j 

Thefe  happy  Confequences  of  Mr.  Srainerd*s  Journey  to 
^ojion  would  have  been  prevented,  in  Cafe  he  had  died, when 
he  was  brought  fo  near  to  Death  in  ISJew-Jgrfey.  Or  if  after 
he  came  firft  to  Northampton  {  where  he  was  much  at  a  Lofb 
and  long  deliberating  which  VVay  to  bend^his  Courfe  )  he  had 
determined  not  to  go  to  Bo/ion. 

The  Providence  of  God  was  obfervable  in  his  going  to 
So/ion  at  aTime  when  not  only  the  honourableCommiilioners 
were  feeking  Miffionaries  to  the  Six  Nations  ;  but  juft  after 
his  Journal^  which  gives  an  Account  of  his  Labours  and  Suc- 
cefs  among  the  Indians^h^d  been  received  and  fpread  InSo^on  : 
Whereby  his  Name  was  known,  and  the  iVluids  of  ferious 
People  were  well  prepared  to  receive  his  Perfon,  and  the 
Teftimony  he  there  gave  for  God  ;  to  exert  themfelves  for 
the  upholding  and  promoting'  the  Interelt  of  Religion  in  his 
Congregation,  and  amongft  the  Indians  el fe where  ;  and  to 
regard  his  Judgment  concerning  the  Q<_jalifications  of  Miffio* 
naries,  ^c.  If  he  had  gone  there  the  Fall  befr>re  (when  he  had 
intended  to  have  made  his  Joerney  into  New- England,  but 
was  prevented  by  afudden  greatlncreafe  of  his  Illnefs)  it  would 
not  have  been  hkely  to  have  been  in  any  Meafure  to  fo  good 
Effed  :  And  alfo  if  he  had  not  been  unexpe6ledly  detained  in 
Bo/?on  ;  For  when  he  went  from  my  Houfe,  he  intended  to 
make  but  a  very  ihort  Stay  there  ;  But  divine  Providence  by 
his  being  brought  fo  low  there,  detained  him  long  ;  thereby 
to  make  Way  for  the  fulfilling  it's  own  gracious  Defigns. 

The  Providence  of  God  was  remarkable  in  fo  ordering,  that 
altho'  he  was  brouglVt  fo  very  near  theGrave  in  Bo/Ion,  that  it 
was  not  in  the  leaft  expected  he  would  ever  come  alive  out 
of  his  Chamber  ;  yet  he  wonderfully  revived,  and  was  pre- 
f«rved  feveral  Months  longer :  So  that  he  had  Opportunity  to 
iee,and  fully  to  converfe  with  both  his  younger Bnthr^n  before 
he  died  ;  which  wasaThing  he  greaily  dellred  ;  and  efpecially 
to  fee  his  Brother  7o^«,with  whom  was  left  theCare  of  hisCon- 
gregation  3  that  he  might  by  him  be  fdly  informed   of  theip 


of  the  Hearts  of  many  to  contribute  liberally  to  fo  excel- 
lent aDefign  ;  befides  the  Benefaaions  in  /'ff/?c»,aNumfeer 
of  Perfons  at  Northampton  with  much  Chearfulnefs  have 
given  about  ^.  160  fold  Tenor  )  ;  and  a  particular  Per- 
fon  in  Sprinzfo/d  h^is  devoted  a  confiderable  Part  of  his 
Eftaie  to  this  Intereft. 

S  f  2  State 


2 14  Rcfleftioos  a^d  Obfervations 

State,  and  might  leave  with  him  fuch  Inftru6lions  and  DireC" 
tions  as  were  requifite  in  order  to  their  fpiritual  Welfare, 
and  to  fend  to  them  his  dying  Charges  and  Counfels.  And 
he  had  alfo  Opportunity,  by  Means  of  this  Sufpenfion  of  his 
Death,  to  find  and  .recommend  a  Couple  of  Perfons  fit  to  be 
employed  as  Mijfionaries  to  the  Six  Nations ^  as  had  been  defired 
of  him. 

Thus,  altho*  it  was  the  Pleafure  of  a  fovereign  God,  that 
he  fhould  be  taken  away  from  his  Congregation,  the  People 
that  he  had  begotten  through  the  Gofpel,  who  were  fo  dear 
to  him  ;  yet  it  was  granred  to  him,  that  before  he  died  he 
fhould  fee  them  well  provided  for,  every  Way  :  He  faw  them 
provided  for  with  One  to  inlfrudt  themjand  take  Care  of  their 
Souls  ;  his  own  Brother ^  whom  he  could  confide  in  :  He  faw 
a  good  Foundation  laid  for  the  Support  of  the  School  among 
them  ;  thofe  Thing?  that  before  were  wanting  in  order  to  it, 
b -ing  fupplicd  :  And  he  had  the  Profpedl  of  a  charitable  Society 
being  eftablirneci,  of  able  3i)d  well-difpofed  Peifons,  who  feem 
to  make  the  fpiritual  Inttrtfi:  of  his  Congregation  their  own  ; 
whereby  he  had  a  comfortabJe  View  of  .their  being  well-pro- 
vided for,  for  the*  future  :  And  he  had  alfo  Opportunity  to 
leave  all  his  dying  Charges  wiih  his  Succellbr  in  the  Pafloral 
Care  of  his  People,  and  by  him  to  fend  his  d}ing  Counfels  to 
them.  Thus  God  granted  him  to  fee  all  Things  happily  fettled, 
or  in  a  hopeful  Way  of  bdng  fo^  before  his  Death,  with  Re- 
fpe<Sl:  to  bis  dear  People. —  And  whereas  not  only  his  ov/nCon- 
gregation,  but  the  Souls  of  the  Jndianf  in  North- America  in 
ger.eral,  were  very  dear  to  him,  and  he  had  greatly  fet  his 
Heart  on  the  propagating  and  extending  the  Kingdom  of 
Chriit  amongr  'cm  ;  God  was  pleafed  to  grant  to  him  (however 
it  v/as  his  Will,  that  he  fliould  be  taken  away,  and  To  fhould 
not  be  the  immediate  lnf#rument  of  'heir  Jnrirui51ion  and  Con- 
verfinn,  yet )  that  before  his  Death,  he  fhould  fee  unexpected 
extraordinary  Provifior.  nude  for  this  alfo.  And  '(is  remarka- 
ble, that  God  not  only  allowed  liini  to  fee  fuch  Provifion  made 
forihc  maintaining  the  i:j:ereff  op  Religion  among  his  owq 
People, and  thePropagatiun  of  ir  clfewhere  ;  but  honoured  him 
by  making  him  i.'ieiVIeans  or  Occ.  lion  of  it.  So  that  it  is  very 
probable,  however  A'Ir.  Braincrd^  during  the  lafl  four  Months 
of  his  Life,  was  ordinarily  in  an  t?arcmcly  weak  and  lowState, 
very  of^en  fcarcc-!y  able  to  fpcak  ;  yet  that  he  was  made  the 
Inftrumcat  or  Means  of  much  nurc  Good'  In    that  Space  of 

Time, 


On  the  preceeding  Memoirs.'  5 1 5 

Time,  than  he  would  have  been  if  he  had  been  well,  and  in 
full  Strength  of  Body.  Thus  God*s  Power  was  manifefted  in 
bis  IVeaknefsyZm^  ititUfe  Af  Chrijl  was  manifefted  in  hu  mortal 
Flejh. 

Another  Thing,  wherein  appears  the  merciful  Difpofal  of 
Providence  with  Refpedt  to  his  Death,  was,  that  he  did  not 
die  in  the  Wildernefs.amang  theSavages,atiL'^a«c«/w^^i,or  the 
Forh  of  Delaware^  or  at  Sufquahannah ;  but  \a  a  Place  where 
his  dying  Behaviour  and  Speeches  might  be  obferved  and  re- 
membred,  and  fome  Account  given  of  u-Hi  for  (he  Benefit  of 
Survivors ;  and  alfo  where  Care  might  be  taken  of  him  in  his 
Sicknefs,  and  proper  Honours  done  him  at  his  Death. 

The  Providence  of  God  is  alfo  worthy  of  Remark,  in  (0 
over-ruling  and  ordering  the  Matter,  that  he  did  noc  finally 
leave  abfolute  Orders  for  the  intire  fupprefling  of  his  privati 
Papers  ;  as  he  had  intended  and  fully  refolved,  infomuch  that 
all  thelmpartunity  of  hisFriends  could  fcarce  reftraia  him  from 
doing  it,  when  fick  at  ^oJion»  And  one  Thing  relating  to 
this  is  peculiarly  remarkable,  vi%.  that  his  Brother,  a  little 
before  his  Death,  fhould  come  from  the  Jerfeys  unexpedled, 
and  bring  hhDiary  to  him,tho'  he  had  received  nofuchOrder. 
So  that  he  had  Opportunity  of  Accefs  to  thefe  his  referved  Pa» 
pers,  and  for  reviewing  the  fame  ;  without  which,  it  appears, 
he  would  at  lafi  have  ordered  them  to  be  wholly  fapprefs'd  : 
But  after  this,  he  the  more  readily  yielded  to  the  Defires  of 
his  Friends,  and  was  willing  to  leave  them  in  their  Hands  to 
bedifpofed  of  as  they  thought  might  be  mod  for  God's  Glory  : 
Bf  which  Means,  hs  bsing  dead,  yet  fpsaketh,  in  thefeMemoirs 
of  h's  Life,  taken  from  thofe  private  Writings  :  Whereby  it 
is  to  be  hoped  he  may  ftiU  be  'as  it  were  the  Inftrument  of 
much  promoting  the  Intereft  of  Religion  in  this  World  -,  the 
Advancement  of  vi^hich  he  fo  much  dcfired,  and  hoped  would 
be  accomplifh'd  after  his  Death. 

If  thefe  Circumftances  of  Mr.  ^rj herd's  Death  02  duly 
confidered,  I  doubt  not  but  they  will  be  acknowledged  as  a 
notable  Inftance  of  God's  Fitherly  Care,  andCovenant- Faith- 
falnefs  towards  them  that  are  devoted  to  l^im,  and  faithfully 
ferve  him  while  they  live  ;  whereby  he  never  fails  nor  forfakes 
ihem,  but  is  with  them  living  and  dying  \  fo  that  whether  they 
live^  they  live  to  the  LORD  ;  or  whe^er  they  die^they  die  to  the 
Lop.D  ;.  and  both  in  Life  andDeath  they  are  own*d  and  taken 
C-irc  of  as  ///>.— Mr. ier^jn^rihimfeif  as  w|s  before  obferved, 

was 


3x6  RefledlioDS  <7»^  Obfcrvations  6fr. 

was  much  in  taking  Notice  (  when  near  his  End  )  of  the  mer- 
ciful Circumftances  of  his  Death  ;  and  faid,  from  Time  to 
Time,  that  God  had  granted  him  all  his  Defire, 

And  I  would  not  conclude  myObfervations  on  the  merciful 
Circumftances  of  Mr.  Brainerd^s  Death  without  acknowledg- 
ing withThankfulnefs,  the  graciousDifpenfation  of  Providence 
to  me  and  my  Family,  in  fo  ordering,  that  he  (  tho'  the  ordi- 
nary Place  of  his  Abode  was  more  than  200  Miles  diftantJ 
fhould  be  caft  hither,  to  my  Houfe,  in  his  laft  Sicknefs,  agd 
(hould  die  here  :  So  that  we  had  Opportunity  for  much  >V^- 
quaintance  and  Converfation  with  him,  and  tofhewhimKind- 
nefs  in  fuch  Circumftances,  and  to  fee  his  dying  Behaviour, 
to  hear  his  dying  Speeches,  to  receive  his  dying  Counfels, 
and  to  have  the  Benefit  of  his  dyingPrayers.  May  God  in  in- 
finite Mercy  grant,  that  we  may  ever  retain  a  properRemem- 
branceof  thefe  Things,  and  make  a  due  Improvement  or  the 
Advantages  we  have  had,  in  thefe  Refpedls  !  The  Lord  grant 
alfo,  that  the  foregoing  Account  of  Mr.  Brainerd's  Life  and 
Death  may  be  for  the  great  fpiritual  Benefit  of  all  that  fliall 
read  it,  and  prove  a  happy  Means  of  promoting  the  Revival  of 
true  Religion  in  thefe  Parts  of  the  World.     Amen, 


5f     3     iI5     3     5). 


^  R  RJTyf.     Pag.  57.  !.   24.  r,  refredi'd.     Pag-  219- 
Marg.  Net.  Lin.'iilt.  r,  Davs  before. 


r§S^2i§^^l!§?S^^IS?iS?I§^lfi?S^^^?K^ 


BOOKS  printed  for  and  fold  by  D.  Henchman  at 
bfs  Shop  over  againji  the  Old  Brick  Meeting- Hou/e 
171  CornhitL 

CToddarcfs  Sa'ety  of  appearing  in  theRighteoufnefs  of  Chrift* 
^   -"  His  Guide  to  Chriit. 


^ 


Sbepard*s  Sincere  Convert. 
-—  .lound  Believer. 


JJip^eton's  Wifdom  of  GOD  in  theRedemption  of  fallen  Man. 
-r-   Difcourfes  from  Rom.  viii.  14.  Setting  forth  the  cleareft 
and  fureft  Marks  f  four  being  fo  led  by  the  Spirit  of  Go® 
as  to  demonftrate  that  we  are  the  Children  oi  God. 

Pemlerton\  Pra61ical  Difcourfes,  I.  The  Dignity  &  Glory 
of  Man's  Primitive  State.  II.  The  Nature  and  Neceffity  of 
Converfion.  111.  The  ReafonaWcnsfsof  flriving  to  obtain  Sal- 
vation,     IV.   The  Method  of  Divine  Grace   in  Converfian. 

V.  The  Nature  and  Obligation  of  Receiving  Chrift  by  Faith, 

VI.  The   Duty   of   imitating  the    Example    of  Christ, 
VJI.   The  Folly  of  kfing  the  SouKot  the  Gain  oithdVorld, 

Dr.  PVatt's  Guide  to  Prayer. 

An  Account  of  the  Life  and  Death  of  Mri.  Elizabeth 

Bury, 

The  ?v'Tar(ow  of  Modern  Divinity.  Touching  the  Cove- 
nant of  Works,  and  the  Covenant  of  Grace.  In  a  'Oi-i.' 
logue  between  a  Miniffer  of  the  Gofpel— -a  Legalift  -—  aa 
Antinomian  -—   and  a  young  Chriftian. 

Dr.  Caiman's  Difcourfes  on  the  Incomprehenriblsnefs  of 
GOD. 

Spiritual  Son^^-  Or  Songs  of  Praife,  with  Peiiitential 
Crifs  to  Jlmjghty  GOD  upon  feveral  Occalions.  Together 
vnth  the  loNG  oi^  Songs  which  is  Solomons. 

Hooker^s  Doubting   ChrijHan  drawn  to  Christ. 

L-yP'g'i  Nature  an-J  Ncceflity  of  the  Nev^-Bii(h. 

£Jivard/i 
I 


BOOKS  Sold  ly  D.  Hencliman: 

Edwardi's  Humble  Attempt  to  promote  explicit  Agree- 
ment and  vifibi'e  Union  of  God's  People  in  extraordinary 
Prayer  for  the  Revival  of  Religion  &c. 

Hoimeih  Good  Government  of  Chriftian  Families  recom- 
mended.    With  a  Difcourfe  of  fecret  Prayer. 

TFrtzht's  Treatife  of  beirg  born  again,  without  which 
no  Man  can  be  faved. 

Jflliine's  Alarm  to  the  Unconverted. 

Fox  on  Time  and  the  End  of  Time. 

IRuJfel's  ^twtn  Sermons. 

Moody  {Jo/hua)  Pra6lical  Difcourfe  concerning  the  Bene- 
fit of  Comraunlon  with  GOD  in  his  Houfe. 

Mather's  Apology  for  the  Liberty  of  the  Churches  in 
New- England,  To  which  is  prefixed  a  Difcourfe  concerning 
Congregational  Churches. 

Sarnard^s  Sermons  on  feveral  Subjedls,  viz.  A  Confirma- 
tion of  the  Truth  of  the  Chriftian  Religion.     Compel  them 
to  come  in.     The  Chriftian  Hero,  or  the  Saints  Vi6lory  and    | 
Reward. 

miliams  (Solomon)  Christ  the  King  and  WItnefs  of 
Truth,  and  the  Nature  Excellency  and  Extent  of  his 
Kingdom  as  founded  in  Truth  and  only  promoted  by  it. 

Some  Remarkable  PafTages  in  the  Life  of  the  Hen.  Col. 
James  Gardner,  who  was  'bhrnT^t  Preji on- Pans*  With 
a  Sermon  by  P.  Dodridge,  D.  D. 

Meditations  on  feveral  divine  Subjeds.  I.  The  Humanity 
of  Christ,  jl.  The  Extenfivencfs  of  God's  good  Defign 
in  ftlling  Joffph  \nio  Egypt,  III.  Christ  the  King  fitting 
at  his  Table.  1V^  Of  the  Love  of  Christ  and  faving 
Knowledge  of  it.     With  a  Letter  to  a  Friend. 


I 


i 


t? 


(^C«, 


M 


w 


f 


A 


M 


\ 


